I just can't manage my hair!!

[kristymarie87]

I'm trying so hard to give up the irons, i only do it at the weekends now.

But when i blow dry its just so all over the place i cant leave it i HAVE to striaghten! I tried sectioning it off and blow drying and these are the results-

http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii286/LiveDieBleed87/12345.jpg

The length as of now ^^

http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii286/LiveDieBleed87/IMG00327-20100620-1721.jpg

http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii286/LiveDieBleed87/IMG00326-20100620-1721.jpg

This was after shampooing, conditioning, coconut oil when wet, heat protector/straightening cream and serum!

I've tried COing and WOing but both left my hair too greasy. I tried stretching washes with no luck. Coconut oil often leaves my hair very greasy so i have to use little.

Where am i going wrong???

The sides ^^

[ukuleleclaire]

Have you tried giving up heat styling all together? There was an adjustment period, but after I gave up flat ironing and blow drying my hair improved dramatically.

If you don't like your natural wave or curl pattern, you can always try pin or rag curls. :)

[kristymarie87]

i just cant! I hate having my hair up all the time, i suffer from headaches and they play up when my hair is up. I cant have it up loose coz it will just fall out.

I dont use heat Mon - Fri which is really good considering i used to do it everyday. I tried curls but the layers are too short and it curls awkwardly. I just want rid of the flicks! Once they are gone i can try to give up altogether!

Plus curls are so time consuming and if they dont turn out right i have to wash all over again and then i get frustrated!

[spidermom]

There are better and worse ways to use your straightener. Be sure you've got a good protective spray and iron each section of hair only once and very fast. You will probably need more trims than somebody who has given up heat styling completely. Your hair should be all right with this, especially if you don't have an extra-long length goal. "BSL+" is a little nebulous; I really don't know what you have in mind.

[kristymarie87]

I get trims every 9 weeks now, used to have tehm every 4. Basically i want BSL until i decide if i want to go longer or not! I think the bottom of BSL will be nice. My heat protector is supposed to be good - its by Loreal professional, nectar something or other and it was £16 from my hair salon!

ETA:
still.....just noticed

30 May 2010 -

http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii286/LiveDieBleed87/123456.jpg

20 June 2010 -

http://i267.photobucket.com/albums/ii286/LiveDieBleed87/12345.jpg

So there is quite a bit of growth! I can see my head is slightly more bent down in the May one but wasnt bent that much!

Im happy about that. But not the fact im stuck with the flicks :(

[dropinthebucket]

maybe the issue is the layers, you know, flipping up and sticking out? mine did that, too - i just had to wait and grow the layers out a bit more - once they all got down to shoulder length, it was all totally ok. (this from someone with annoyingly flippy hair - not curly, not wavy, more like super cow licks in several places!)

[aisling]

It looks like you're developing some waves, your hair isn't straight at all and definitely not 1A/B as you've put in your profile. I think you should read up a little on how to handle non straight hair, that may help you.

[Pandora.]

Don't worry, I know exactly how you feel here, and I'm sure there are others here who are in the same boat. :grouphug:

I thought I couldn't live without my hair straighteners, but I find the key is to gradually use them less. At first I started off with only a few times a week, but now I'm down to as little (for me) once a week. Hopefully it will decrease even further as time progresses. I find the less I heat style, the more easier my hair is to manage. That could be the case for you too.

My hair has been damaged from heat (on top of multiple bleaching :shocked:) so mine tinds to be a complete nightmare sometimes, although since joining LHC it's getting better than before. If I were you, I would give up blow-drying and start air-drying instead. I don't know about you, but when I blow-dry my hair it becomes a lot frizzier than it would when I air-dry.

I really hate having my hair up all the time as well, but I just have to keep telling myself it's for the best. You could search around the internet for an updo specifically for shorter hair. You could also try putting your hair in braids - I found this worked for me when I had short hair, WITH these awkward super short layers. If you get headaches when your hair is up, that might be because you have the hair tie secured too tightly?

[kristymarie87]

Yes i was dreading that answer!! The layers used to grow out so quick and i'd jump to get them cut back in....now i want them gone and they wont budge!

They make my hair look so much more damaged than it is :(

[Kome]

I feel your pain. I hated my hair that length. I found that use Aloe Vera Gel worked very well for me. I would put it in my hair towel dried and scrunch it. A nice big generous glob. It's great for you hair and not damaging or crunchy like regular gels. I did this for awhile instead of straightening and everyone really liked it and it helped my hair health out A LOT. Give it a try! :)

[kristymarie87]

Don't worry, I know exactly how you feel here, and I'm sure there are others here who are in the same boat. :grouphug:

I thought I couldn't live without my hair straighteners, but I find the key is to gradually use them less. At first I started off with only a few times a week, but now I'm down to as little (for me) once a week. Hopefully it will decrease even further as time progresses. I find the less I heat style, the more easier my hair is to manage. That could be the case for you too.

My hair has been damaged from heat (on top of multiple bleaching :shocked:) so mine tinds to be a complete nightmare sometimes, although since joining LHC it's getting better than before. If I were you, I would give up blow-drying and start air-drying instead. I don't know about you, but when I blow-dry my hair it becomes a lot frizzier than it would when I air-dry.

I really hate having my hair up all the time as well, but I just have to keep telling myself it's for the best. You could search around the internet for an updo specifically for shorter hair. You could also try putting your hair in braids - I found this worked for me when I had short hair, WITH these awkward super short layers. If you get headaches when your hair is up, that might be because you have the hair tie secured too tightly?


I'm down to once/twice a week now so i guess thats a start....i do air dry most days as i have it up for work but it takes so long to dry and i cant deal with going out with it wet!! I usually only dry it during the week if im cold (i live in a basement flat) or if i try to do something new and usually fail!

I try to do updos but im so fussy and have no patience, i think i need a stylist! Theres plenty of girls with short messy updos and i love it, but when i do it to myself i just look like a real mess!


I feel your pain. I hated my hair that length. I found that use Aloe Vera Gel worked very well for me. I would put it in my hair towel dried and scrunch it. A nice big generous glob. It's great for you hair and not damaging or crunchy like regular gels. I did this for awhile instead of straightening and everyone really liked it and it helped my hair health out A LOT. Give it a try! :)


I really wanna try the scrunch technique! Its the thought of spending all that time doing it and then it goes wrong....

Did you let it dry naturally? Did you get nice waves? The one time i did try it i got bent bits instead of cute waves!

[Kome]

Here are some pictures of it scrunched with aloe vera:

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk68/kome42/Mah%20Hair/7ba4fab3.jpg (http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk68/kome42/Mah%20Hair/7ba4fab3.jpg)

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk68/kome42/Mah%20Hair/f17edf3e.jpg

[kristymarie87]

Here are some pictures of it scrunched with aloe vera:

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk68/kome42/Mah%20Hair/7ba4fab3.jpg

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk68/kome42/Mah%20Hair/f17edf3e.jpg

I'd love that!! Looks so natural, i will have to get some gel (when i get paid) and try it! Of course i will show everyone how it turns out!

So could you explain exaclty how to do it in steps? Like do you wash, towel dry, apply gel, scrunch and then its done?

[Kome]

I really wanna try the scrunch technique! Its the thought of spending all that time doing it and then it goes wrong....

Did you let it dry naturally? Did you get nice waves? The one time i did try it i got bent bits instead of cute waves!

I just posted two links to pictures. It scrunches quite nicely! My hair normally just POOFS when I try and scrunch it with regular gel. I was ecstatic to find that aloe vera works great for me.

I let it dry naturally and scrunch here and there while I'm getting dressed or whatever. The blow dryer makes it POOF for me too. Give it a try. I think it'll work well for you, but BE GENEROUS on the gel Slop it on there. It won't dry crunchy or wet. It will just make it really soft. :)

[Merlin]

I'm down to once/twice a week now so i guess thats a start..

Sorry, I can't resist it.. For all those people who remember the anti-drug campaigns of the 80s...

"Like, I do straighteners now and again but I can give it up any time I want..."

For what my opinion is worth btw, I think your hair looks great

[rach]

try - http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=37395

[kristymarie87]

Ooooo im doing :D Will get gel tomorrow :D :D bit excited now!

^^ in reply to kome.....i posted and 2 people must have posted while i was typing :D

[Kome]

I'd love that!! Looks so natural, i will have to get some gel (when i get paid) and try it! Of course i will show everyone how it turns out!

So could you explain exaclty how to do it in steps? Like do you wash, towel dry, apply gel, scrunch and then its done?

Your normal washing routine. I use a detangler to brush my hair when It's wet because otherwise it looks awful. Once my hair is not dripping (towel dried), but still wet, I add in the aloe vera and run it through with my fingers. Then I scrunch it up and keep doing this as it dries. Not every second, but just when I think about it as I'm doing other things. I've always brushed it as it's dried too and the aloe vera takes away the poof and frizz and makes it straighter. So you could probably do twists, scrunches, or make it flater. Try some different things out and play with it. I haven't done this in awhile myself, but now I might have to do it again! It's really great for on the go, don't have time to do my hair in the morning, days. You know, when it's still wet and then dries and looks like CRAP. You can just put in the aloe vera with it wet and go and scrunch it here and there as it dries and WALA! You hair be did. Hehe. :cool:

[kristymarie87]

Your normal washing routine. I use a detangler to brush my hair when It's wet because otherwise it looks awful. Once my hair is not dripping (towel dried), but still wet, I add in the aloe vera and run it through with my fingers. Then I scrunch it up and keep doing this as it dries. Not every second, but just when I think about it as I'm doing other things. I've always brushed it as it's dried too and the aloe vera takes away the poof and frizz and makes it straighter. So you could probably do twists, scrunches, or make it flater. Try some different things out and play with it. I haven't done this in awhile myself, but now I might have to do it again! It's really great for on the go, don't have time to do my hair in the morning, days. You know, when it's still wet and then dries and looks like CRAP. You can just put in the aloe vera with it wet and go and scrunch it here and there as it dries and WALA! You hair be did. Hehe. :cool:


That sounds perfect for work in the morning! Especially as its summer now and hopefully by winter it will have grown a bit!

[Kome]

My hair has grown so much in the last year! I didn't think so, but after looking at pictures and realizing it's only been a year since I've cut my hair, I'm so happy! It'll be long before you know it! It's not anywhere near my goal, but it finally doesn't feel short anymore and I don't feel in that awkward faze now. I hope it grows twice as much as normal before winter! Hehe.

[Katze]

It looks like you're developing some waves, your hair isn't straight at all and definitely not 1A/B as you've put in your profile. I think you should read up a little on how to handle non straight hair, that may help you.

this.

my hair looked a lot like yours did at that length. It 'flipped' and 'kinked' - then i realized I have waves! Some patience and better treatment (more moisture) and you might just be surprised.




Did you let it dry naturally? Did you get nice waves? The one time i did try it i got bent bits instead of cute waves!

again, you are at what is, for many people, a very awkward length. Your waves might only develop in your length; mine did.

[loralie]

One thing that helped me give up the straightener was to comb constantly while my hair is drying. Or, I occasionally "blowdry" my hair straight using my box fan... it's cool air so it makes it sleek and shiny... but the real trick is to comb it straight the entire time it dries.

Hope this helps! I was at your length not too long ago and it was really tough to give up the heat styling, but it's been 8 months since I've blowdried or straightened! You can do it, and your hair will love you for it!

[Kome]

One thing that helped me give up the straightener was to comb constantly while my hair is drying. Or, I occasionally "blowdry" my hair straight using my box fan... it's cool air so it makes it sleek and shiny... but the real trick is to comb it straight the entire time it dries.

Hope this helps! I was at your length not too long ago and it was really tough to give up the heat styling, but it's been 8 months since I've blowdried or straightened! You can do it, and your hair will love you for it!

Ditto on this. I've been doing this as well. It doesn't work well when it's humid, but if it's not humid where you are this works great! It's not the best option, but it's better than using heat. One step at a time! Can't wait to see pics of the results, whatever you decide to do. :)

[McFearless]

Is your hair damaged? Could that be the reason it doesnt lie flat?

I think that once your hair has grown out a bit the layers will blend in causing less of a flip and more of a wave.

Good luck.

[kristymarie87]

I cant work the multi quote thingy so...

Katze - i am curious to see if i have waves, but my hair has always been straight, maybe with a kink but never any waves! Can hair just start growing wavy??

Loralie - i try to brush as it drys, but most of the time it still drys with a flick... i know my hair will be much better but sometimes i just cant be bothered to wait for it to dry!

Kome - i live in London so its not humid but i guess my hair thinks it is! I've tried not using heat but only managed a week and couldnt deal with it! I guess its because when i dry naturally its never straight (the flick is there) and its so flat!

McFearless - It is a little damaged, but not exessively, i straighten once a week and colour with a semi. I have regular trims and trim myself a bit in between. I'm hoping as the layers grow out it will settle down.

I just want it to look healthy and shiny and not dry and 'dead'. Even with loads of conditioner/serum/oil it looks dull and most of the time greasy :(

[Deelight]

I think the little flips look way cool!!! My hair did something similar when it was at that length and I actually liked it while it lasted. It made my long-ish bob look kind of edgy.

[curlytm]

I also think this is an issue of taste as well. Just because hair isn't perfectly straight doesn't mean that it looks bad or unhealthy. This might be frustrating, but try thinking of the way your hair shapes itself as it's body and personality. This comes second nature to curly-headed girls that know the curl will go where it wants when it wants. Same with your hair. It's just that your "style" has probably long been sleek and "perfect" and transitioning from that seems awkward.

That being said, I think that encouraging the wave in your hair (which it seems to want to do anyway) might be a big help in the transition. Best of luck, kristymarie. :)

[Gulbahar]

To be honest, I never understood why on earth anybody wanted to have perfectly straight hair and I really dislike the look of flat-ironed hair. I've always wanted my hair to be at least a little wild. (Of course it never is, no matter what I do.) So I actually like your flipping ends a lot.
I agree with curlytm about it being an issue of taste. May be you can try to like it too?

[kristymarie87]

I also think this is an issue of taste as well. Just because hair isn't perfectly straight doesn't mean that it looks bad or unhealthy. This might be frustrating, but try thinking of the way your hair shapes itself as it's body and personality. This comes second nature to curly-headed girls that know the curl will go where it wants when it wants. Same with your hair. It's just that your "style" has probably long been sleek and "perfect" and transitioning from that seems awkward.

That being said, I think that encouraging the wave in your hair (which it seems to want to do anyway) might be a big help in the transition. Best of luck, kristymarie. :)

I wouldnt mind the flicks if i had shiny, soft looking hair. But as you can see from the pics it looks frizzy - the pics are the tamest i could get. I usually flick it under a bit when straightening because i like the moovement, but i look like ive put my finger in a plug socket! I cant seem to work with the waves no matter what i do or use. Someone suggested aloe vera gel which im off to get at lunch today.

I tjust seems if i use anything to smooth it, i end up with greasy! I use a liitle and its not enough a bit more and its too much! The texture of the hairs themselves are a nightmare :(

So if anyone could recommend how i can work with the waves i would be grateful!