How to make buns look young?

[Kristina713]

Hi everyone. I am growing my layered BSL hair to waist. My ends are very damaged (old perm) and my hair is currently half straight and half permed. Awkward! I was fixing things by either straightening it all or curling it all, but I realized that I was just destroying my poor ends. So -- I decided to wear my hair up much more, which will protect my ends and hide the half-curly situation. I've been experimenting with various buns and also bought a hair stick and hair fork, which I am loving.

Here's my problem. When I wear my hair in a bun it just feels kind of old and serious to me. I am 36 and single. I would really like to meet somebody special, and I find it a challenge, since most men my age are married. Anyway, when I leave the house, I like to feel like I look young, and fun, and sexy. I worry that buns make me look older, more serious, and less approachable.

So I'm looking for suggestions to make updos look younger, more fun and more casual. I thought about cutting bangs, because they look so cute on Loepsie (long hair on Youtube). But I have a very short forehead, so bangs tend to look funny on me. Also, I have a greasy forehead, so bangs get greasy fast. Other ideas?

[Pixna]

What about a loose bun or a messy bun like these? They look young, fun, feminine, and sexy to my eye!

Here (http://i.realone.com/assets/rn/img/7/6/7/5/15505767-15505769-large.jpg)

here (http://www.bayareabags.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/messybun1.jpg)

and here (http://www.hairstyleslibrary.com/images/img-thing.jpg)

[jaine]

I agree, the messier the better. Here's a "Tessa bun" that looks sufficiently messy to give the right effect :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H1RfIoV3bZs

[UltraBella]

I wear my hair in a bun almost daily, I have to for work. I also sleep every night in a bun. I have some face framing pieces that make it look casual and soft when left out and I think that makes it look younger and pretty.

[Kristin]

I usually do a "pouf" in the front to create more volume on top for a more youthful look. You could also try doing a lace braid in the front, as people tend to associate braids with younger women. (I personally think that's weird, but women at work have told me they don't wear braids because it makes them look "too young." Whatever.)

I also think that the double-bun style (like in my avatar) is very young-looking, but I like it. Lora posted instructions in the hairstyles section.

[2peasinapod]

ITA with the messy bun idea. It seems that everywhere I look (fashion magazines, youtube, real life, etc), everyone is either wearing one, asking how to do one, or giving instructions for one!

[Siava]

The hair accessory you use to hold the bun in place can make a difference as well. Hair sticks with cute danglies (insects/animals, colorful beads, etc.) and sparkly scrunchies are less serious looking.

[Kristina713]

Thanks for the suggestions. I used to do that "Tessa bun" all the time, but my hair is getting a bit too long for it. I'll have to try other messy bun techniques. And I like the idea of the pouf or braid in front. I agree that it will take away from the "scary librarian" look that I am trying to avoid.

[Katze]

I look terrible in scraped back hairdos too, and the bun emphasizes things I do not want to emphasize. :) Putting a bun higher on my head and poofing the front of my hair, as well as making the whole 'do messy (this is not hard to do with my hair!) is about the only way I can feel comfortable wearing a bun.

A braid in the front does look nice (this seems to be very in among women in their 20s here where I live) - IF you can get your hair to do that.

Another alternative (and something that protects ends while still looking elegant) is to fold the hair on itself, then pin the resulting mass to the crown of the head. On me this looks more retro and thus flatters my particular appearance better.

I totally agree with you on buns making some people look dumpy or unattractive - I see women with long necks, thick hair, or finer features than mine (or who are just younger and thinner!) wearing buns and they look great. On me, it looks BAD. Ugly, dumpy, unkempt, and emphasizes how thin my ends are and how messy my hair is.

[Capybara]

I second that the accessories go a long way in softening down a bun. Headbands and dangly earrings are great for this too :)

I find that bee-butt buns can look really feminine and young, because it's easy to create volume at the top (I usually push the bun up about an inch or two before securing it), and - with my hair - pieces fall out and frame my face.

Maybe long side bangs in the front would work for you? My bangs are long enough that they fit into a ponytail, yet then help soften a look :)

[klcqtee]

I'll put an off-centered small french braid into my hair that leads into my bun. It makes it more interesting than just a regular old cinnabun. A rose bun is young looking, IMO. Twin buns, though not necessarily work appropriate, are cute and fun.

You could also look into picking up some cute scarves or cloth belts in fun colours to wear as had bands. All mine are in fun bright colours (bright purple or shiny green) that keep me from looking so severe and add some colour.

Also, you could hit Big Lots or a dollar store and pick up some clips with flowers on them. If you can't find any at a reasonable price, you can always pick up regular clips, and hot glue fake flowers on. You can clip the flower to the base of your bun on one side or the other. I'm not sure if it'll feel too young to you, but it's a great way to celebrate spring!

[Igor]

My notes on this:
Messy buns look younger
Adding some fake pieces of (colourful) hair could make a bun look younger and funkier
Headbands seems to work too
Low buns seem to be seen as “older” so place them higher on your head
Cute clips make the overall appearance look less “sleek”

[LadyLongLocks]

A messy bun. Add a cute youthful headband or flower in the bun. Maybe leave some long hairs falling down and curl them. Make an interesting zig zag part or part far on one side and let the hair hang in a pretty swoop!

[Sarahmoon]

I see far more buns on young people than old people so I don't associate it with looking old, but bangs or loose strands will make it look less neat and serious.

[Heidi_234]

here (http://www.bayareabags.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/messybun1.jpg)

I reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally like the look of this one!

[moominhapa]

This is why I got bangs. It really helps to have some kind of hair around the face. If you think your face isn't suited to bangs, you might try some long face framing layers instead or long side swept bangs that can be styled in different ways. I think most kinds of bangs make women look much younger, personally, and can really soften up up-dos. You're also lucky, in a way, that the bottom half of your hair is permed. That way if you put it up the straight part is hidden and you can leave some messy curls loose at the ends.

[Blandine]

Fancy hair accessoires dress up any bun. Endless options that no scary librarian would wear.

By the way, I heard from guys several times that the imagination of pulling the hair stick from a bun and the long mane falling down is very attractive.

Also try a thin scarf, braided with your hair or tied round the bun, or round your head, or both.

[Dreams_in_Pink]

I think the lower the bun is, the older you look :D I've seen many girls with very high cinnabuns. High buns also might include short layers and bangs better.

[pennylane]

I personally prefer messy buns. I do not like very severe buns, a messy bun looks younger and more fun it is also more becoming to the face of the person. :)

For me looking neat is not an issue, looking good is! ;)

http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g290/mikisu/inspiration_messy_bun.jpg

mod ETA: pleas note the On Posting Pictures - Hotlinking with IMG Tags and Copyright Issues (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=35939), thanks.

[VintageBrooklyn]

I love those pictures of the messy buns! They look so elegant and feminine!
I too, cut my bangs because when I wear buns and updo's I felt like my hair looked too severe and not playful enough for a chicky in her late twenties! So I went the bangs route, but I love that tousled (sp?) updo look of the messy buns shown! :)

[emmabovary]

here (http://www.bayareabags.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/messybun1.jpg)


GORGEOUS! I wonder how this is made..

[Roseate]

When I wear a high bun with a headband, I feel almost too young! I make the bun a bit loose, so the scalp hair poofs up a bit behind the headband, and let wisps fall where they may.

[Isilme]

I do a side bun, just a regular cinnamon bun placed right behind one ear! Add optional big flower:)

[LoveMyMutt]

I look terrible with bangs also, but I find that some longish layers around my face help. For me, having them hit about cheekbone softens things. I have a long face and strong features, so severely pulled back hair makes me look like a man dressed as a schoolmarm. But if I leave some layers loose (my hair is wavy so they curl) and making the bun messy (not difficult with my hair!) works.

[Lady Mary]

I :heartbeat messy buns!

[manderly]

I think low side buns (behind an ear) also look really young and hot but still look neat and professional. Stick a lovely flower or sparkly accessory in it and voila!

[tanya222]

Lots of great ideas here, I've been following this thread too, I just want to avoid looking like uber-stern Lillith from Frasier :D

[Kristina713]

Thanks everyone! What generous replies. I think I'm going to keep a few of those layers around the face. I'm also going to head to the local accessory shop and pick up some flowers and headbands. I played around with some looser, larger, and messier buns last night and was happily surprised to find that, with my new fork, they do hold. Thanks to the LHC, I'm feeling better about my hair.

By the way, one member gently PM-ed me about the importance of accepting my age and about the value of feeling sexy without looking like a teenager. I just wanted to explain that I am not trying to look younger than my age (36). In fact, for work, I often wear my hair slicked back and feel quite sophisticated. Or if I am going to a more formal event, a sleek updo can indeed by very sexy. But it's becoming summer where I live, and I have a mostly casual lifestyle. So I am wanting to find ways to wear my hair up that will look summery and pretty. But, in fact, I am also aware of not wearing my hair "too young". Pigtails or childish looking hairtoys are not for me. Of course, it's all about context. I wouldn't usually wear two braids, but for the beach they would be really cute. In fact, one of the things that I like about summer is that it feels like I can dress and wear my hair in younger styles. Any other summery updo ideas?

[ravenreed]

I don't think any woman over the age of 20 wakes up and thinks, "You know, I want to add 10 years to the way I look..." I think it is okay to want to wear a youthful look as opposed to something that makes you look older. I am 40, and I am okay with never looking like I did as a teen, however, I am also okay with the fact that no one believes that I am 40 when they first meet me. ;)

[LoveMyMutt]

By the way, one member gently PM-ed me about the importance of accepting my age and about the value of feeling sexy without looking like a teenager. I just wanted to explain that I am not trying to look younger than my age (36). In fact, for work, I often wear my hair slicked back and feel quite sophisticated. Or if I am going to a more formal event, a sleek updo can indeed by very sexy. But it's becoming summer where I live, and I have a mostly casual lifestyle. So I am wanting to find ways to wear my hair up that will look summery and pretty. But, in fact, I am also aware of not wearing my hair "too young". Pigtails or childish looking hairtoys are not for me. Of course, it's all about context. I wouldn't usually wear two braids, but for the beach they would be really cute. In fact, one of the things that I like about summer is that it feels like I can dress and wear my hair in younger styles. Any other summery updo ideas?

For me it's not necessarily that the sleek buns look too "old," it just they look too "ugly" on me ;) They look gorgeous on people with the right sort of face, but on me they emphasize my big nose and the length & angularity of my face. I need some fluffy stuff around to soften things, otherwise I look like the more frightening type of schoolmarm. Maybe not an OLD schoolmarm, but an UNATTRACTIVE one for sure!

[LaurelSpring]

I agree with having some whispy layers and tendrils around the face. This works for me. I am growing out my bangs so I run into this problem also. My bangs are now hitting around the top of my cheekbones. I can pull them across my forehead for a sleek bangish type look or I let them sort of hang in whipies in the front or to the side. Even just pulling out a few chin length side pieces around the face helps elongate your face and make it more youthful and sexy. I also do messy buns and like to add some cute decorations or colored clippies and things. Mostly though the whispies and tendrils are the main thing that keeps me from looking too frumpy I think.

PS. I wanted to add that since I have such fine hair messy buns are hard for me to achieve. I have to fake it with one of those fake hair scrunciis that matches my hair color. I use this to puff out my hair and I blend it in with my own hair.

[pennylane]

Kristina, here you have some more ideas of messy buns! I'm sure they will look lovely on you! :D

On a note aside, messy buns are not only for teenagers, messy buns are for all ages,we are not talking here pigytails :rolleyes: we are talking messy buns, which in my opinion look fun, sexy and very becoming to all! :flower:


http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g290/mikisu/hairstyle091.jpg
http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g290/mikisu/961f9e7e2a6ecbdc_buns_twists_max_ma.jpg
http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g290/mikisu/keira-knightley-updo-hairstyle-p-1.jpg

mod ETA: pleas note the On Posting Pictures - Hotlinking with IMG Tags and Copyright Issues (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=35939), thanks.

[jasper]

Try two instead of one: double styles can be perceived as youthful. And maybe try a French twist or chignon becsuse that can look more sophistocated and less dumpy, maybe, than a bun. Also, I agree that the hair toys make a lot of difference in the look.

[julliams]

I agree with the "pouf" on top, also you can do some braids on the side of on the top which seems to be the look right now. I find a big flower on one side of the bun is always nice.

[gi2121]

Great ideas here!
Also check these ones (from a longhaired girl who did a different style everyday for a month before chopping it off):
http://hairjunky.com/from-headquarters/jan-in-march-day-21-finger-wave/
http://hairjunky.com/from-headquarters/jan-in-march-day-20-classic-elegance/
http://hairjunky.com/from-headquarters/jan-in-march-day-18-a-crown-of-braids/
http://hairjunky.com/from-headquarters/jan-in-march-day-10-pin-up/
http://hairjunky.com/from-headquarters/jan-in-march-day-7-twisted-sister/
http://hairjunky.com/from-headquarters/jan-in-march-day-2/

How cool is she (she has very short hair now, like so: http://hairjunky.com/from-headquarters/an-accessory-a-day-all-week/ )?? I think all her udpos are youthful and creative but not teen-like.

And I wanted to add... How GORGEOUS is Keira Knightley??? I have beauty-envy :p.

[MandaMom2Three]

Squats! Lunges too :p

[strwbrry dakri]

Squats! Lunges too :p
LOL!!!

My two cents - Taylor Swift. There are several tutorial videos on Youtube that show how to accomplish that VERY youthful look. (It has the soft pieces near the face, too)

[Domino]

Did you try side buns? they look cuter and younger, I'm 19 and I prefer a low messy side bun to neat and tight looks :)

[eezepeeze]

To make my buns seem more trendy and stylish, I put a poof in the very front (aka the bumpit bump) or I make fake bangs by styling the front of my hair in a side swept bangs look and then making the bump at the crown of my head and then making the bun right below it.

Also, I often make a bun right below and just behind my ear and put in a cute flower. I find any style pulled to the side is much more youthful than one centered on the back of your head.

[GeoJ]

When my hair was BSL to waist, I think it gave me the youngest look to wear it down with a headband (still does, but I rarely wear my hair down now). For buns, looser buns paired with headbands, and maybe with an accent braid or two, works for me to get a youthful look. I would normally pair this with jeans and a fitted tank top or t-shirt with boots or mocassins. That's just what works for me, but this kind of thing will vary so much from person to person.

For summer updos, I like to ensure that all of my hair is off of my face and neck, because it gets so hot and humid where I live.

Whoever said squats and lunges was right; exercise does wonders!

[Lamb]

Parting your hair on one side, and bunning the rest while keeping the part in the front would also soften things up.

[may1em]

Where's Trolleypup and the "pull for sexy" hairstick?

[*Aoife*]

I was going to say keep it low, but I've noticed people saying the opposite.
I always associate librarian's buns with being higher up.

[zenobia]

I actually think most people can pull off long, side-swept bangs, regardless of having a long or short forehead. Some bangs, wispy pieces, and a headband can make a world of difference.

Also fun dangly earrings help when wearing a bun.

[bugeyedmonster2]

http://i59.photobucket.com/albums/g290/mikisu/961f9e7e2a6ecbdc_buns_twists_max_ma.jpg


Ooo I like this one! Any ideas on what it is or how to do it?

[curlytm]

I was going to say keep it low, but I've noticed people saying the opposite.
I always associate librarian's buns with being higher up.

So do I! Although, I can see how a tight bun at the nape would make someone look more severe, I always look older when I have a bun just below the crown. I totally agree with the messy bun look. A messy bun at the nape or behind my right ear (I part my hair to the right) allows some of my curly tendrils to fall out naturally. Especially if I'm loose with how I secure the bun. Good luck with your bun-ventures!

[May]

I like these styles and they look pretty easy to do and are so cute! .


http://img710.imageshack.us/img710/1677/ashze.th.jpg (http://img710.imageshack.us/i/ashze.jpg/)

http://img31.imageshack.us/img31/3899/nicoleritchiebraid.th.jpg (http://img31.imageshack.us/i/nicoleritchiebraid.jpg/)