View Full Version : Smack down

May 13th, 2010, 07:23 PM
So my little sister is a long hair, she hovers between wrist length and beyond. Looking for some encouragement I posted a picture of my hair on my family blog, and commented that I can see it's growing, but but still doesn't feel long. Its almost waist length now.

She commented immediately on my blog that your hair is not long until... and made a list of the typical, someone else sits on it, you get it tangled in someone else's buttons, it blows into someone elses mouth etc etc.
I get that her hair is a huge part of her identity, but why does she have to be nasty about mine? Our hair will never look alike, mine is a much darker brown and silver, and hers is very straight where as mine gets curlier the longer it gets. Why couldn't she just ask me if I'm having fun with it, or something?

May 13th, 2010, 07:29 PM
Grr! I have a sister like that.

Long is whatever you think is long. It is very subjective-- and its your hair. You rock it however you want!


May 13th, 2010, 08:08 PM
Little sisters can be mean like that sometimes. Some people just need something to be mean about.

May 13th, 2010, 09:59 PM
It seems pretty long to me. Maybe the picture showed a little too good-looking hair and made your sister a little nervous?

May 13th, 2010, 10:53 PM
Your hair looks great! My guess is your sister is afraid of losing her identity as the long haired one. Make it into a joke and maybe the two of you can have a good laugh. Sisters are pretty much awesome. It is always worth going the extra miles so there are no lasting bad feelings between you (if you can).

May 14th, 2010, 01:49 AM
I have two little sisters, and three daughters. I swear girls are MUCH meaner to each other than boys. It's just a sibling rivalry thing.

May 14th, 2010, 04:35 AM
I actually have 3 little sisters, (and 4 brothers) and 3 daughters (1 son), so I have noticed the nasty-ness of girls... I was just really surprised. Both bu how mean she was, and by how hurt I felt.http://i227.photobucket.com/albums/dd283/chibbylick/100_2385.jpg[/IMG] oh heck sorry it is so big!

May 14th, 2010, 07:49 AM
Looks like you are giving her som competition there!:eyebrows:
You have LOVELY hair!!!! And it is L-O-N-G-HHHH!!:D

May 14th, 2010, 09:25 AM
Well your hair is getting long and it looks pretty. When I read your post, I didn't see her comments as mean particularly, more humorous, but I don't know your sister. I'm sorry that she hurt your feelings.

May 14th, 2010, 09:35 AM
Your hair is long, anyone can see that. Clearly your sister was either just trying to tease you or one-up you. Please try not to let it get to you. If you honestly feel that she was trying to make you feel bad, please remember that some people have a need to one-up everyone else, even their loved ones. Just know that somewhere she has an insecurity, and let it go. :blossom:

May 14th, 2010, 09:38 AM
Sibling rivalry--sister's tend to be very critical when it comes to something they feel "competitive" about. I have an older sister like this. I experience a lot of hurt for the lack of compliments and the abundance of critical comments.

It's just something we'll have to experience with family. You should tell her that the Sun won't supernova and vaporize the Earth if she actually says something nice for a change.

May 14th, 2010, 12:04 PM
I think it may have been her trying to be humourous aswell...

Awhile back my older sister asked me if her hair was long (it's just below APL) and I said no. From her facial expression I saw my answer made her unhappy. I didn't mean to upset her.

May 14th, 2010, 12:50 PM
In developmental psychology class, I learned that they've tracked this "female" characteristic all the way back to kids in elementary / primary / grade school.

Boys tend to be physically aggressive -- fighting and hitting and such -- whereas girls tend to be "relationally" aggressive -- name-calling and forming exclusive cliques and ignoring others.

When you stop to think about it, we girls have figured out (at a very young age even) how to do a "better" job of hurting each other than boys have. If your sister had punched you in the arm, it would have hurt for a day or two, depending on how hard she hit you. Even a black eye will heal up in 1-2 weeks' time. But that hurtful comment that she made can continue to hurt you week after week, month after month.....

That's why you have all of us "tress sisters" to offer support instead! :D

May 14th, 2010, 08:04 PM
Thanks for your encouragement everyone. I guess I probably am over sensitive. I kept my hair short for years, partly because long hair was "her thing". I am growing for me, but I guess I still am threatened by her.
It is kind of funny that all the things she stated as measures of long-hair-ed-ness could all be PREVENTED by protective hair styling! I'm never going to lose my braid up the vacuum cleaner 'cos I'll bun it!

May 15th, 2010, 12:05 AM
I have to say I've played the part of the long-haired sister "smacking down" the growing one. My little sister has hip-length hair and when she says she's catching up to me I reply that she's got a long way to go. I tease her about not having long hair, although by anyone else's standards it is very long. But I've never said anything mean about it - it's always good-natured, and recently it's amazed even me with its length and I've commented on that.
Somewhere deep down though, I do feel a little threatened - I've always been the long haired one in the family, and the slight possibility that my sister might catch up or (god forbid) pass me freaks me out a little. But not enough to be mean. How would that help anything? Her hair is beautiful in its own, very different, way, and I'm happy that it's growing so well for her.
http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/album.php?albumid=5278&pictureid=68979 (excuse the messy braids)
Anyway, she just beat me in height, and she lords that over me every day, so we're even.

From your description of your sister's comments, I don't think they were intended badly. At worst it was probably a form of reverse-bragging - a kind of "look at all the things I have to go through that you don't" - not trying to put you down.
And I'll repeat what some other people have said here: long hair is what you perceive it to be. For me, it's not really long till it reaches Thigh. But for most people, Waist or even BSL is considered long. If your perception of long hair and hers don't match up, that's not a problem - there are probably way more people who agree with your version of long hair than hers.