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View Full Version : "whats the point in long hair if no one sees it???"



formunkyfrommom
April 22nd, 2010, 12:29 AM
says my mom......im kinda wondering how to respond to that and what some of you lovely long hairs would say :)

mine is down to my tailbone...i always wear in buns so my mom is all upset because she thinks my hair was nicer when it was shoulder length because i wore it down then....now i will never cut my hair again for religious reasons so i am looking at wearing a lot of buns ;) but i dont know what to say to comments like that.....

Svenja
April 22nd, 2010, 01:38 AM
You know, I have thought about that sometimes, too. If noboday sees the hair, why bother? And then I had an epiphany. Hair is a bit like a tattoo in my opinion. You have it for yourself. You choose how it's supposed to look like, and how big it's supposed to be - not because somebody from the "outside world" tells you but because you want it for yourself. The tattoo is decoration/ornament/beauty for your body and for yourself. Even if you cannot see it (if it's on the back) or you never show it to anyone you KNOW it's there and you feel beautiful with it. For me it's the same with hair: i do not have to show my hair to anyone or show it off constantly, but for myself I KNOW it's long and beautiful etc. And that's what counts.

Aditi
April 22nd, 2010, 01:46 AM
To bun your hair or to leave it open is completely on you and if my guessing is correct you usually put your hair in bun because you don't want to damage them by sitting on it or by day-to-day wear and tear :) But you can wear it down on special occasions and surprise your people ;) :D

naereid
April 22nd, 2010, 02:06 AM
My mom says that too. Why have long hair if you wear it up all the time? Last time she mentioned it, I had some sort of an answer for her. I told her that discovering new ways to style my hair is making me happy, whereas with short hair you're only limited to ONE style - down. You can do hundreds of different things with long hair instead of being forced to wear that one style day after day.

Sure there's gels and other products for styling short hair, I've never used them so I don't know. But all in all I'd say that longer hair is more versatile and more fun.

rosek
April 22nd, 2010, 04:19 AM
Because I like it : )

Its not the most witty comeback, but its the truth.

I don't really mind what anyone else thinks about the way I wear my hair, or how long it is. Hair is one of the few things I do for myself.

BlackfootHair
April 22nd, 2010, 04:30 AM
It's for the person wearing it. Even if you don't wear it down, it doesn't mean you can't enjoy it. I work as a nail tech so I always wear my hair back for work. Some days (even right now) I just wear it back because otherwise it's all in my face like a lion mane. I always wear it back when eating. Most of the time, my hair is pulled back, either in a low ponytail or a up in a clip. But I enjoy it even moreso when I let it down at night, and I enjoy it when taking care of it. I wear my hair longer very much so for myself. If others like it, great. If not, eh. :)

Dreams_in_Pink
April 22nd, 2010, 04:32 AM
...there can be times when you want your hair to be seen, and times you don't want ;) for example, when going to work you don't need to show your extra-long hair (it might even create a negative impression at work, where individuality isn't appreciated) but when going to prom or spending time with your partner, you let it down ;)

Blandine
April 22nd, 2010, 04:35 AM
My answer would be: My hair is long because I like updo's and you need long hair for that. I like changing styles and learning new ones. So far I can do about 40 different hair styles - how many can you do with short hair?

Arctic
April 22nd, 2010, 04:43 AM
There are different reasons for everybody why they want long hair and how they enjoy it. For me one of the reasons why I grow mine is to be able to do updos and braids. Your mom seems to have different ideas why she would have long hair and is projecting them to you.

jasper
April 22nd, 2010, 04:50 AM
If you aren't cutting your hair for religious reasons, then you have your answer right there.

My answer to that question is that the point of my long hair is that it takes less time and fuss to get my hair into a practical, professional looking style for work.

Svenja
April 22nd, 2010, 04:52 AM
Can't your mom just accept the answer "Because I like it this way"?

Toadstool
April 22nd, 2010, 05:34 AM
What's the point of wearing clean knickers if nobody sees them??

seedge
April 22nd, 2010, 05:36 AM
When I was growing up, I wasn't allowed to have long hair. My hair is curly-wavy and very frizzy. I lived in a very humid environment. Read this as 'puffball'

Anytime I went to a hairdresser I was told my hair was very damaged. I'm not so sure that was the truth. It is dry and coarse and I think they thought it was damaged. So of course, I would cut it. I always thought (and pictures from the time confirm it) that I looked like a brillo pad most of the time.

When I left home, I started to grow my hair. Not knowing how to care for it, and hairdressers saying it was damaged, I would eventually give in and cut it when it was at the most awkward stage of too short to put up and too long to fly frizzily in my face.

Once I got it long enough to keep out of my face, I kept it longer at shoulder length. I tried many products to make it soft and control the frizz with not much success. Then I learned to french braid from a book. For years, I wore it braided.

Then one day it was at my bra strap, and it stopped growing- or so I thought. For more years it stayed at that length. I would wonder why it stopped growing, but I could do many different hairstyles and I was mostly content.

A few years ago, I was reading on the internet and found LHC. I learned my hair was still growing, but breaking off due to a variety of reasons, mostly brushing, protein (to correct 'damaged' hair) and for me, silicones.

I adopted LHC tecniques, dumped SLS and 'cones, added moisture and oil and my hair stopped breaking and began growing again. It made me incredibly happy. There were times I would run my fingers through it and laugh with glee.

On February 11 this year I reached a goal - My hair is now at the bottom of my tail bone. I was shocked and amazed and delighted. Me! Ms. Damaged Hair. I had very long hair with not a lot of taper and a good hemline with below the waist hair. Eureka!

My hair is my secret weapon. It makes me different. It makes me happy. I like the attention it brings when I wear it down (once a month or so). I like it tickling my hips. I like having something that not many people I know have. I like that it is beautiful and healthy. And here is a biggie- It makes me feel feminine. I feel womanly and sexy. My hair is mine. T

The point for me: It is a line in the sand and a beacon of success. A desire fulfilled.

Thanks LHC for giving me the tools and lighting the way.

Nae
April 22nd, 2010, 05:41 AM
I agree with the others, versatility is the key. I had short hair, I had to wear it the same two ways over and over and over. How ridiculous! Now I have cool options and cooler hair toys and it makes me all happy inside. Can't wait till it is a little longer and I have even more updo options!! The possibilities are endless, go long hair!

Purdy Bear
April 22nd, 2010, 05:46 AM
What's the point of wearing clean knickers if nobody sees them??


RFLOL. I will have to remember that one.

Long hair is warm, its a beautiful thing to see whether in an updo or down. Its also very attractive and versatile.

BunnyBee
April 22nd, 2010, 06:16 AM
Well you can't put short hair up in all these fancy buns so what's the point in long hair if you can't put it up?? =/

Carolyn
April 22nd, 2010, 06:34 AM
My hair is my secret weapon. It makes me different. It makes me happy. I like the attention it brings when I wear it down (once a month or so). I like it tickling my hips. I like having something that not many people I know have. I like that it is beautiful and healthy. And here is a biggie- It makes me feel feminine. I feel womanly and sexy. My hair is mine. Oh my goodness, I could have written that word for word except for the attention part. We think alike :D

chotee
April 22nd, 2010, 06:50 AM
My DH too used to complain that i don't look good in buns and to leave my hair down but he loves long hair. He doesn't like me trimming it too :smile:...i know the consequences of letting my hair down that often so i started braiding my hair....you can braid it too with your tail-bone length hair, people can see the length, its safe and there are different styles you can try....

FrannyG
April 22nd, 2010, 06:58 AM
As both a mother and a daughter myself, I think that "I wear it this way because I like it" is a more than sufficient response to anyone who poses such a question. To go into all of your reasoning is really unnecessary and might make you feel defensive.

Calista
April 22nd, 2010, 07:02 AM
The implicit assumption your mother makes (that long hair is more work than short hair, so there´s gotta be something to warrant that extra work) is false. Long hair is easier to care for than short hair - for me anyway. So your answer could be "because short hair is just too much work".

And of course because you like it. That must be everybody´s ultimate motivation. :shrug:

SimplyViki
April 22nd, 2010, 07:09 AM
Some reasons that come to mind:

-I like it
-I see it
-I can do more styles this way
-I let it down sometimes, which is fun
-It's easier
-It's soft and fluffy and I can run my hands through it before I go to bed. :cloud9: :p

jackiesjottings
April 22nd, 2010, 07:35 AM
I agree, with a lot of others, I have my hair long for myself. But one of the great things about long hair is being able to do creative things with it :)

JamieLeigh
April 22nd, 2010, 08:12 AM
It's no one else's business how you wear your hair. It's hard to say that in a nice way, especially to a relative like a mom, but it's the truth! :p

I wear mine up all the time, and I just say "I wear it in protective styles during my busy days, so that it will look nice when I get the urge to wear it down." Usually shuts people up lol :D

Madame J
April 22nd, 2010, 08:24 AM
If you aren't cutting your hair for religious reasons, then you have your answer right there.

+1 to this. If your mom knows you are growing your hair for religious reasons, why would she think that you would abandon that just because it doesn't look like she wants it?

ilovelonghair
April 22nd, 2010, 08:29 AM
"whats the point in long hair if no one sees it???"


I'm thinking: because updo's are fun! The longer the hair the more crazy updo's you can do. I'm looking forward to that when my hair will be longer :)

Fairlight63
April 22nd, 2010, 08:37 AM
I am growing my hair long because:

1. I can do more hairstyles with long hair than with short.

2.It is easier to take care of - no more having to set it, blow dry it, color it, get it cut every month, etc.

3. It looks different than everyone else. Most women over 60 have hair that is short, permed, colored that looks like dead hair, or short hair - gray & they look like a man.

4. I LOVE long hair!

Bonkers57
April 22nd, 2010, 09:04 AM
Best comeback yet! :cheese: :cheese: lol!!!

If I were the OP, I'd just say it's against my religion.



What's the point of wearing clean knickers if nobody sees them??

spidermom
April 22nd, 2010, 09:21 AM
Good one, Toadstool!

My daughter has said this to me. She'll reach over and pull out my hairstick sometimes when we're out together. I told her it is most practical to wear it up when I'm doing other things because that way I don't get it caught in anything; long hair can be hazardous! But at the end of the day, I can take it down and comb it out; it's part of my ritual, a way to acknowledge that I'm finished with the work of the day.

Keildra
April 22nd, 2010, 09:38 AM
What's the point of wearing clean knickers if nobody sees them??
I second this except my version has to do with the pretty underclothing from Victoria's Secret, only special people get to see it but it still makes you feel pretty when even they don't see it.

grmn-rpnzl
April 22nd, 2010, 09:56 AM
You know, I have thought about that sometimes, too. If noboday sees the hair, why bother? And then I had an epiphany. Hair is a bit like a tattoo in my opinion. You have it for yourself. You choose how it's supposed to look like, and how big it's supposed to be - not because somebody from the "outside world" tells you but because you want it for yourself. The tattoo is decoration/ornament/beauty for your body and for yourself. Even if you cannot see it (if it's on the back) or you never show it to anyone you KNOW it's there and you feel beautiful with it. For me it's the same with hair: i do not have to show my hair to anyone or show it off constantly, but for myself I KNOW it's long and beautiful etc. And that's what counts.
You made a very excellent point. I never thought of it that way. People are so put on to tell you how to dress, look, style and wear your hair becuase those are factors that they can try to manipulate and a tattoo is a permeant choice. My hair is my new tattoo and i want to have long hair permeantly and if i want to hide it, so be it!

:thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup: :thumbsup:

princessp
April 22nd, 2010, 10:08 AM
The implicit assumption your mother makes (that long hair is more work than short hair, so there´s gotta be something to warrant that extra work) is false. Long hair is easier to care for than short hair - for me anyway. So your answer could be "because short hair is just too much work".

And of course because you like it. That must be everybody´s ultimate motivation. :shrug:

I know it's weird that people assume this. I can't count the number of times I have explained that to someone (long hair is easier).

Love all these responses!

I like to answer questions like this with a question (because these usually have more to do with issues the person asking has, rather than you). So next time she says it, you should ask your mom why she doesn't grow her hair (assuming she has short hair). Tell her it's all the rage and send her here! :D

Masara
April 22nd, 2010, 10:16 AM
I never wear my hair down in public, but everyone sees my updos. If I wore it down all the time, it would lose its novelty factor. Updos (and toys) care easily changed.

Unzadi
April 22nd, 2010, 10:34 AM
Nobody sees long hair when it's up? So it becomes invisible when bunned? Cool. :drums fingers: There must be some way to turn this into a superpower.

redneckprincess
April 22nd, 2010, 10:55 AM
never thought of it that way...thanks
You know, I have thought about that sometimes, too. If noboday sees the hair, why bother? And then I had an epiphany. Hair is a bit like a tattoo in my opinion. You have it for yourself. You choose how it's supposed to look like, and how big it's supposed to be - not because somebody from the "outside world" tells you but because you want it for yourself. The tattoo is decoration/ornament/beauty for your body and for yourself. Even if you cannot see it (if it's on the back) or you never show it to anyone you KNOW it's there and you feel beautiful with it. For me it's the same with hair: i do not have to show my hair to anyone or show it off constantly, but for myself I KNOW it's long and beautiful etc. And that's what counts.

pdy2kn6
April 22nd, 2010, 12:58 PM
hahaha, THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT MY MUM SAYS TOO!!! She really hates my updos, she thinks it looks like a granny style. I constantly just reply saying I am keeping it protected and only will wear it down on certain occasions

Fiferstone
April 22nd, 2010, 04:39 PM
Yep, long hair is for me. For me, it is my only vanity. I actually kind of like the "stealth" aspect of the fact that no one else knows how long it is in my go-to buns (cinnabun, chinese bun, lazy wrap, spidermom). I'm a finey and I'm one inch from tailbone.

I also agree that your "I'm growing it for religious reasons" is reason enough.

What's the point of a short hair cut if you have to keep getting your hair cut (and lay out however much it costs) over and over again? Your hair wants to grow, so why not just give in and let it be as long as it wants to be? :evil grin:

turtlelover
April 22nd, 2010, 10:27 PM
I'm not much of an updo person myself, so I have thought this very thing about people that keep their hair up all the time!!! I always think about how much better their hair would look taken down! But, each to their own!!! :) I would certainly never harass someone else about their choices, though privately I don't care for the constant ponytail/bun looks.

angelthadiva
April 22nd, 2010, 10:35 PM
OP: If you are growing your hair out for religious reasons, it should not matter what your mother thinks. What you are doing is between you and God; if she has issues with it, perhaps she should take that up with Him and not you ;)

On a more serious note, she should respect your view. Trying out new styles that would give your hair protection might help you stay out of a rut. I, personally switch things up and wear English braids sometimes rather than a bunned style, but to each his/her own :flower:

Igor
April 23rd, 2010, 01:59 AM
“That long hair can be put up in wonderful and versatile ways that short hair can't”

Squeak toy
April 23rd, 2010, 11:18 AM
I was recently thinking about this. I have hair to my waist and I wear it up everyday. I work 6 days a week as a nurse so it has to be secured but I even wear it up when I am off. I wore it down a day to show it off because I thought what is the point of it being so long and keeping it up all the time. That day however was a nightmare as it was constantly in my way and by the end was so tangled it took almost an hour to undo. I realized that if you have stuff to do, cleaning cooking and shopping you can not do that with long hair and I am always doing something. I also realized that even when I had my shortest style to just under my chin I constantly wore it up - but as everyone else said in much less interesting or varied ways. Really no matter what my length is if the hair falls in my line of sight round my face it must be pulled back. I wear it in braids often that I learned how to do from a book from the braided image by Karen ribble. This let's the length be seen but I can keep busy. I actually got the cut to my chin after searching for a cut that I could leave down all the time and it not get in my way. I am much happier with my long hair and all I have learned to do on YouTube. One more thing see how much time people with their hair down spend pulling it out of their face all day long, to me that is a
big waste and hassle.

CiannaitTrozel
April 23rd, 2010, 12:17 PM
See personally I want long hair for myself. Mine is just now getting long enough where I wear it up all the time and I get that question alot from my coworkers. But it's like I tell them. My hair isn't for their entertainment or constant veiwing. It's a treat to myself, I remember always wishing I had long hair and ended up asking myself "Why dont I have long hair". Soon after I started growing it out, and it makes me so happy. I think that is the point for me. It makes me so damn happy haha.

Which brings a question from me lol.

Am I the only one here that when I let my bun fall I cant help but smile?

KBG
April 23rd, 2010, 01:39 PM
I think the whole "more than meets the eye"/Transformers factor is neat & I can't wait!:cheese: (<chanting>...growgrowgrow) :o

A family friend who would babysit for us had long hair(about hip length) that was always up. I remember being amazed, when staying overnight or very late @ her house, watching her take down her hair to brush it. It was almost like an insider-type thing as she never wore it out in public.

THe last time I saw her, she'd cut it above the shoulders and bleached it.:(

As a child (this was the '70s) I remember thinking that she was so beautiful and magical with the "secret" longer hair.

Iylivarae
April 23rd, 2010, 01:52 PM
"I bet you are also wearing nice underwear, even though nobody is going to see it".

That usually works...