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View Full Version : How important are opinions of others regarding your hair to you?



juliaxena
April 9th, 2010, 03:45 AM
I have a love hate relationship with my hair at the moment. I love it's color and shine and also its "almost evenness". I don't love its lenght. I have noticed though that I don't need aproval of others as long as far as my hair is concerned. This is really strange because I'm not this super confident ego maniac. If someone wants to criticize it (like a hairdresser last week who said my hair is boring and I could use some layers-I didn't let her do them of course!), I'm not bothered. If someone says it looks great, I'll accept the compliment, but it won't affect me to a great extent. To me it's first and foremost how I feel about my hair. What about you?

Lemur_Catta
April 9th, 2010, 03:59 AM
It depends on the comment. If it is an opinion, like "boring" "too long" "you look like mary magdalene" or something like that, it doesn't bother me at all. If it's something real, that concerns the condition of my hair, for example "the ends look fried" "you have split ends" "the color is uneven", then I care.

elina333
April 9th, 2010, 04:21 AM
I dont really care what others say. I just learned to love my wavy/curly hair and its so liberating! I used to hate it before and somehow it feels like curly hair isnt as "accepted" as straight. My hair is now healthy, thick and lustrous and if people complain and think I should straighten it, I just dont care. Cuz I know when I finally reach waist, they're gonna be envious :D

Also, people who say nasty things about your hair usually dont have a clue about what they're talking about. Like saying its too long... It can NEVER BE TOO LONG! :cheer:

Long live the long hairs :D

Blandine
April 9th, 2010, 04:24 AM
Hairdressers like cutting and they wil always try to talk you into those few current fashion cuts they know, dyeing and whatever they do 50 times per day to make money. That opinion does not matter.

Other people - well, depends what they do to their own hair. People who have nice healthy natural hair may be able to give valuable tips. Being critizised by an artificial blonde with pure chemistry on her head, however - hm, I'd keep quiet and think, forget it.

embee
April 9th, 2010, 05:17 AM
I don't care any longer. When I was younger I did care, and got pushed around because of that. Now if someone does not like long hair, or my updo, or thinks I should cut, that's their opinion, everyone has one. Big deal... not. ;)

Bethie
April 9th, 2010, 05:19 AM
It depends on who is saying it. If DH were to tell me that I'm looking old with my hair, then I will take that more seriously than if a total stranger said something like that.

Sisko
April 9th, 2010, 05:21 AM
Back when I was still getting my hair cut at the salon, I made an appointment for a small trim with my somewhat regular hairdresser. My mum decided to come along since we were planning on going to town after my trim (and I wanted to ensure they didn't cut too much off). While there, my hairdresser complimented the thickness and waves during the combing session. In comes another hairdresser, takes one look at my hair, rolls her eyes and exclaims "Oh, please, she has nothing in the way of hair, that's not a lot of hair at all; it's thin and stringy". My poor 'dresser seemed quite embarrassed at her comment. It was uncalled for and rude. :crazyq: Needless to say, I never went back (although I probably should have).

My mum couldn't stop laughing on the way to town; it was the most blatant jealous dig at someone she'd seen. Nonetheless, it did sting a little that someone would feel the need to make such a remark. It's not their opinion that stinks as much as their intent and that people can be such jerks (I didn't go in to the salon and pay to have my hair insulted). Further, thin or thick hair, it can be just as beautiful when taken care of properly.

More recently while grocery shopping, during a very dry streak - no pun intended - I had a fellow longhair look at my hair in utter disdain, and I knew it was time for a deep conditioning treatment. :D I should add that she had particularly healthy, shiny looking hair.

Other than those two instances, I rarely take note of outside-LHC comments, but I do value my SO's opinion - good taste!

Nae
April 9th, 2010, 05:23 AM
I think part of it is because we have learned so much about hair care by belonging to our lovely LHC that we KNOW what is good or bad advice. Unlike a lot of people we usually have defined hair goals and we know from the experiences of others what it is going to take to get there. Our confidence soars. We know that we have support from people who have the length of hair that we want, most of the people who comment aren't long hairs after all.

I think it would be akin to someone telling a medieval historian that everyone back then lived in a castle, went out slaying dragons and regularly saved damsels in distress. It just isn't right and they wouldn't be too effected by the uninformed opinion. There may be an eye roll but it doesn't change the core beliefs.

Ravenne
April 9th, 2010, 05:34 AM
It depends on who it's coming from and what it is, like everyone else said.

If it's someone I don't know or barely know, I always take it with a grain of salt, so to speak. If it's something nice, a simple "Thank you" is in order. If it's not so nice... I just shrug it off and walk away.

On the other hand, if it were to come from say.. my mother, my boyfriend, or another close friend, I'd take their opinion, whatever it is, more to heart. So far though I've had nothing but encouragement. :)

Loreley
April 9th, 2010, 05:50 AM
Yeah, it depends on the comment. If they say my hair is demaged and looks horrible I feel bad. But if they say my hair is not fashionable or I'd look much better with shorter hair, I don't care. :D
My grandma always tells me I should have it cut back to shoulder length because it'd look prettier and it wouldn't take so much time to take care of it. :luke:

chopandchange
April 9th, 2010, 07:00 AM
Their opinions hurt me a lot, but it doesn't change how I feel personally about my hair, nor does it ever make me waver in my determination to carry on growing it and keeping it "natural" instead of dying and straightening.

JenniferNoel
April 9th, 2010, 07:03 AM
I don't give a flying **** what anyone thinks about any aspect of me. I am me, I can wear whatever hair/clothes/whatever I want to, I am not you. It's on my head, not yours. Y'know?

marikamt
April 9th, 2010, 07:07 AM
I think when I was younger, it would have bothered me....

Now, I really only worry (most of the time) about my own opinion.... especially about something like this. My hair is not going to effect the world one way or another, so if I am happy with it, that is all that matters.

chelles2kids
April 9th, 2010, 07:19 AM
Meh...not very important to me, as they saying goes~I'm not here to decorate their world.:p

I remember a comment that my Dad said to me about my hair, he said that I looked like an 'ole hippie granny.
I totally took that as a compliment, so his 'dig' did not get the response that he was looking for.:laugh:

rags
April 9th, 2010, 07:34 AM
I won't lie; sometimes things people say hurt my feelings. Do they make me consider changing my hair? Not at all. The only comments I ever even consider doing anything about are when DD will tell me the back is looking a bit uneven -time for a trim.

Honestly, if I paid attention to people's comments, I would have hair no longer than shoulder (because it's fine and thin) and dyed (because I'm going grey). Oh, and I'd never wear it up - because it's thin. I am just too old now to care what they think. DH loves it long, I love it long, and we're the only ones who matter.

Igor
April 9th, 2010, 07:37 AM
Extremely unimportant. The only ones opinion I care just a little about is my boyfriends (and he happens to like it)
My hair is for me. It makes me happy. The rest of the world could hate it and I wouldn’t care

I don’t understand the people that seem to be gutted by a single non-positive comment. Does that mean they will be affected by everything else the world has to say?
“Buy this, buy that, lose weight, take this loan, buy a house here, wear makeup like this, get promoted in your job, adopt this cat, join the clean up team for the environment today, find a better boyfriend now” etc
No, thanks.

Babyfine
April 9th, 2010, 07:40 AM
I've received some negative comments of late and I must admit they did hurt my feelings- I want to not care, I want to grow my hair long- but I don't like to think I look bad, either.
I'm getting older so when I get told that my thin, stringy hair worn up or down ages me and I should have a shorter cut that would make my hair look thicker,and make me look younger- I HAVE been obsessing about it of late.
I try not to but I do. I've been trying to ignore them and realize that they are coming from a certain worldview.
I don't want to cut my hair, though, and look like every one else my age.

cmnt831
April 9th, 2010, 09:45 AM
I have really never cared what people said about my hair. I've been told it's a mess for most of my life and that never stopped me from wearing it the way I wanted. Even when I was given a rare compliment, I would accept it and then not really think about it again. There was even a time when I covered it with scarves and got very negative feedback from people about that - but I still kept wearing the scarves, because I liked them. :D

I do find that I give more weight to what my husband says and the comments people have given me here on LHC. I do appreciate constructive criticism in most areas of my life - hair included. :)

Speckla
April 9th, 2010, 09:52 AM
Back when my hair was in poor condition? It hurt alot and made me want to chop it off or relax it again. Now? I just flip my hair over my shoulder and ignore them.

Peter
April 9th, 2010, 10:11 AM
It used to bother me but I don't care anymore.

Purdy Bear
April 9th, 2010, 10:11 AM
Iv only learnt the lesson of the following in the last few years:

"Other peoples opinions are none of my business"

Before I found that quote, I took everything good and bad to heart. Loosing my hair was hard enough without the usual comments.

The thing that broke the back and made me realise was a women I used to work with. When I was over weight she said I was too fat and should loose weight, and then when I got slim (still within healthy range), she said I was too thin and should put on weight. I finally told her I wasnt interested in her opinion anymore!

If people are rude to you, then it says more about them and dont take it on board. If they compliment you, then its your choice to accept that if you so wish.

GoddesJourney
April 9th, 2010, 10:58 AM
I love my hair. I'm not too worried about what others think of it. Most older ladies seem to like it. They tell me how shiny it is. I think it's because my hair is dark, so it reflects the light really well. I like it when my husband says something nice about it. That's about all.

HintOfMint
April 9th, 2010, 12:16 PM
Meh, the first thing I do is consider the source. That alone is usually enough to weed out whether or not the opinion has merit. When my close friends, who loved my long hair, said I needed a haircut because the damage was quite obvious (the damaged parts were several shades lighter and it wasn't because of bleach:rolleyes:) it didn't hurt, because they were right and they weren't insulting me.
An ex-boyfriend said that I shouldn't grow my hair too long, but then I realized that this was the guy who said I should keep my hair at shoulder length and then ate his words with each inch gained.

Loviatar
April 9th, 2010, 12:21 PM
When I was newer to LHC, it bothered me immensely. I was not confident about my own hair and in my mind, everyone had prettier hair than I did.

Now I don't give a [notallowedtosayitonLHC]. My hair is awesome, no matter what anyone else says.

I think I've just become less tolerant of other people's opinions about my body. :cheese:

spidermom
April 9th, 2010, 01:00 PM
I really don't give a rip, except that I do love a compliment.

Topaz
April 9th, 2010, 01:22 PM
I agree with so many others who have said that if the criticism comes from someone else on a long hair journey, and their hair looks fantastic, then their comments can be taken constructively (although really, even other long hairs shouldn't offer criticism unless you ask them for it). If the criticism comes from someone with hair fried by chemicals and bad treatment, then just take it with a grain of salt and blow it off.

However, having said that, deep down inside the negative comments still sting. Just like the positive comments and compliments can make your spirit soar. We're all just human, after all.

bte
April 9th, 2010, 01:35 PM
I'm not at all bothered by those that dislike my hair. They can always go and look at somebody else. If they like it, and tell me so, then I'm pleased. So either way, I win.

Carolyn
April 9th, 2010, 03:58 PM
I haven't gotten any negative comments for a long time. I have heard a couple of second hand comments, both relating to age and long hair. Eh :rolleyes: There is no one's opinion that really matters to me. Note the line in my siggy. I live by that. But as Spidermom said, compliments are always welcome :)

MonikaHa
April 9th, 2010, 06:37 PM
I used to care so much, that I kept my hair a light blonde for many, many years. Once, when I got it a bit darker the "public opinion" hated it, so I lightened it again.

Now, for some reason I don't give a hoot any more, I cut it, hennaed it, and I LOVE IT.

starlights
April 9th, 2010, 07:09 PM
Hair comments do effect me, i cannot deny it. But i bear in mind sometimes people may feel jealous or insecure about their own hair so their comment stems from that.
Always listen to the people who you can TRUST.

ZaBasDa
April 9th, 2010, 07:26 PM
I've never really cared. I learned at a young age that many people would say rude things about my hair because they were very envious. My family (mother and younger sister) and often older people make snide comments about my hair color, but I kind of expect that. I brush off comments like that; it's not like I am growing my hair for others. I do like compliments, but I usually only get those if I'm have a bad, or frizzy, or not curly day, which I really don't understand. :confused:

Katurday
April 9th, 2010, 08:06 PM
Recently my father said I should cut my hair and perm it and bleach it peroxide blonde "Like Marilyn Monroe". Honestly, it made me smile. He's a funny old man. You can't please everyone, and sure comments hurt, but after a while you start to care about your own opinion more than the that of others.

XcaliburGirl
April 9th, 2010, 08:49 PM
It doesn't bother me usually, but if it's someone I care about it I take it more seriously.

My husband always knew me with at least TBL hair and I cut it to waist for our wedding (straggly ends, plus cutting down on style time). He said it was "just long, not special anymore". That kinda hurt, but he didn't mean it. He was just shocked by the severed 12in of hair he saw before he actually saw the result. Now he's totally supportive whether I want to chop it to pixie or grow it as long as I want (or anything in between).:)

sneakybea
April 9th, 2010, 09:26 PM
I don't get a lot of comments, either positive or negative, about my hair. But once when I was hanging out with my friends, there was another woman who used to have hair close to my length but she cut it to just past her shoulders. She was saying how much easier it was to care for and to color. So the conversation turned to coloring one's hair, and when I said I had never done so, one of my friends said "Oh, you should. It would make your hair look thicker." That really didn't make me want to color my hair, but I did start worrying that my hair was thin looking or I was losing hair or something. I wish it hadn't; she might not have meant "your hair looks thin" as much as "everybody wants thicker hair."
On the other hand, my mother is always talking about how I should cut my hair, and it has really become white noise to me and thus easy to ignore. Besides, back in January I expressed admiration for somebody else's hair, which was long and red, and my mom said "Why? Yours is nicer." Which convinced me that my mom is teasing me more than anything else.

viking_quest
April 9th, 2010, 10:55 PM
I only cared about my dad's comments on my hair since he always hated my hair to be longer than a pixie. When I started growing it out he would tell me that he didn't like my hair or whatnot until one day he said that he liked it, which was more important than all of the other compliments I've gotten combined.

And now I don't care about other people's opinions on my at all.

walterSCAN
April 9th, 2010, 11:52 PM
When I was a lot younger (read: the dreaded elementary and middle school-age) I cared a lot if other people thought my hair looked dirty, and would worry about it constantly, especially given the combination of my really fine, relatively oily, and naturally lighter brown hair. It really did look dirty faster.

Ever since high school though, negative hair comments don't really do anything but bewilder me-- and I don't get many in the first place. I really don't get many hair comments in general, except from the kids at work...

Heh, there's one boy who likes to tell me what he thinks my hair looks like in whatever style I'm wearing that day-- "Miss [myname], your hair looks like a (rope, honey bun, etc)!" Or today, I wore it loose for the first time in months and you should have seen his eyes bulge when he said, "Miss [myname]! Your hair is long!!" :laugh: It always amuses me...

But yeah, I honestly only care what I think of my hair anymore... I'll ask for DF's input, but mine carries a lot more weight! :wink: I like that he likes my hair, but that's not why I like it!

Kelli Kat
April 10th, 2010, 12:51 AM
I really don't care what others think of my hair, or any other part of me for that matter.

Aynir
April 10th, 2010, 02:21 AM
Had to give my two cents to this topic. Normally peoples comments don't affect me at all, but when it's someone really close one, it can really make a difference. My ex used to hate my natural curly/wavy/frizzy/shoulder lenght hair and told me over and over again how messy and dirty it looks. It affected me so much that I started to hate its natural state and got to a cycle of cutting, colouring and flat-ironing and thought that's what I just have to do to look presentable.

Nowadays I have decided to be stubborn and not let anyone tell me how I should look. One day I made a statement to my current boyfriend that my hair will grow and be curly sometimes and get back to natural boring haircolour eventually. He smiled at me and told the longer the better, curly is cute and he likes my natural colour better anyway. It feels really good to have a hair-ally under the same roof :)

windinherhair
April 10th, 2010, 02:56 AM
I don't need approval of others either. I am the reason why my hair is long, because that is what I want. It is nice when I get compliments, but I don't rely on them. Actually, sometimes they surprise me because my hair is ordinary to myself but it becomes very noticeable to others when I have it down.

I have never been the super confident person either, but without my long hair I think then I would feel more insecure.

Noctifer
April 10th, 2010, 03:17 AM
Not that important but then i haven't got a negative remark (that i know of) since i was 15

Thow i usually dont care what people think about me anyway

Clarisse
April 10th, 2010, 03:33 AM
It depends on the opinion and the person it belongs to. If it's something like "long hair doesn't fit you", "it is boring without layers", "dark blinde/light brown doesn't look good on you" and the like, I really couldn't care less. If it's a negative comment from someone who doesn't know anything about healthy hair care, or if I'm just not very close to the person, I don't care.

If it is someone who knows about healthy hair care and has about the same aesthetics as me, then I do care - and I always looooove hair compliments :D I'm not here to decorate anybody else's world, but I do certainly like when I do :D

AgnesONutter
April 10th, 2010, 03:58 AM
Once a classmate of mine asked another what colour my hair was, the second classmates verdict was mouse brown. That hurt and I never forgave her, since granted, my hair might not be the prettiest colour in dull classroom lightning but she could just have settled for light brown, or simply dark blonde. But no, she had to go call it mouse brown. Of course I know my natural hair colour is infinitely more interesting than hers and will always be since it changes colour depending on the light, really coming to life in sunlight when it is a glowing copper and gold. I also know that my hair will always be in better condition than hers since she straightens her hair, and colours it, regularly even if she has the most gorgeous, soft, thick wave/curl to her hair and the colour is a wonderful, natural rye blonde. But that is comfort for a tiger's heart. On the other hand, it is the only negative comment I have ever got.

The most surprising comment I ever got was when I was out walking and a strange man in his late 30's suddenly walks up to me and says my hair is the most beautiful, shiny and soft looking he has ever seen and asks if he can touch it. I was a bit freaked out by the request and said no, since touching of my hair is a very personal and intimate thing. Still, the comment made my day and possibly the whole month.

So...I guess I am sensitive to what people think of my hair, but as with most of you I would never do anything about a negative comment like "you would look better in shorter hair" unless the reason given by the commenter was that my ends needed some trimming, and I myself could see it.

Katze
April 10th, 2010, 04:50 AM
When I get comments about my hair, it is usually because I say I am trying to grow it out, then the person responds with some comment about my ends or how thin my hair is. :( This makes me feel bad because these are the things I am sensitive about regarding my hair anyway - I trim and trim and trim and still have taper, and after losing about half my hair, my ends DO look thin.

when comments hit where it hurts, it is hard to brush them off...

*Aoife*
April 10th, 2010, 06:35 AM
I don't get many negative comments to my face. I tend to ignore most people's opinions when it comes to my hair. My parent's opinions are more important to me than strangers. And my mam is just so happy I'm growing out my hair (and taking care of it myself) that she doesn't say anything critical. She just showers me with compliments :)

SHELIAANN1969
April 10th, 2010, 06:38 AM
I am always shocked and surprised when I get a hair compliment,

But in all reality, I love my hair, it's a personal thing and I don't care what anyone else truly thinks about it.

Like I said, a compliment is nice, it is reassurance that it is indeed flattering, but the compliments aren't necessary. :)

rchorr
April 10th, 2010, 10:24 AM
I've been disagreeing with people for YEARS!!! So many people think that it's "ok" to tell someone else that they don't look "right." Well, I don't really want to look like everyone else! It's part of that whole "marching to the beat of a different drummer."

RCHORR'

Elbereth
April 10th, 2010, 10:55 AM
After all these years on LHC, I couldn't care less.

The only people whose opinion about my hair interests me the least bit are myself and DH. We both love my hair just the way it is. It's not "perfect" even to my own standards, but I know it is the best I can get (definitely heat styling, cutting and dyeing are not going to make it any better). End of discussion.:p

Pumpkin
April 10th, 2010, 11:44 AM
I will be 42 this year, and it has taken me awhile to come to the conclusion that I really don't listen to other people when it comes to my 'looks'. I do what makes me happy with myself. My mother is very critical of my looks, always has been, in a very negative way, and this affected me into my adult life. I now realize people like that project their insecurities onto people around them. Making them feel better.

So, no, anyone's opinion about my hair does not bother me one way or the other.

Scarlet_Tear
April 10th, 2010, 12:17 PM
now i don't care about people's opinion. when i was younger, yes. but i've understood that people usually speaks for jealousy :)

Capybara
April 10th, 2010, 12:41 PM
Honestly, I don't mind what people think of my hair. Granted, I don't get many negative comments that I can think of, maybe that helps. But I find that most people seem to either not notice my hair (especially if it's up) or if they do, they appreciate it because it's so different from the "mainstream ideal" of hair.

It helps to have a thick skin. If someone doesn't like my hair, so what? I won't let it ruin my day. They're entitled to their own opinion, and while it may or may not be true (sometimes it does need a trim :P ) I can choose whether to agree or not, or smile and forget about what they said. My hair isn't the most important thing to me :o

katze666
April 28th, 2010, 12:26 PM
Absolutly nothing.

JamieLeigh
April 28th, 2010, 12:41 PM
Since I don't see very many hairstyles I like around me in my daily life, or many who truly know how to take care of their hair if it's growing long, my answer is that it really doesn't matter to me what someone thinks of mine. They are not concerned with what I think, and it's their business what they do with themselves, so why should I concern myself with wearing my hair for others?

I do love compliments, though, but who wouldn't? :p

The only hair advice I ever seem to get is "why don't you cut it and donate it to Locks of Love?"......but that would be threadjacking. ;)

breezefaerie
April 28th, 2010, 12:41 PM
My SO's opinion matters very much, followed by family, then close friends.
However, she hates my hair short so I'm doing ok!

Tegaladwen
April 28th, 2010, 02:45 PM
I had a comment from one of my work colleagues today when I told her that I am growing my hair to waist length. She said I'd look like some sort of hippy or something along those lines. I didn't take it seriously though. Nothing is going to change my mind. I am going to get to waist and maybe beyond :D

Snowcold
April 28th, 2010, 03:48 PM
It depends, sometimes when it's close family it can kinda effect me. But most of the time I don't care about other people and their opinions.

I don't wear fashionable clothes, dyed my hair various colours from blond, to copper to purple and I really never took any notice of what people used to think. Except this one time when there was a forum topic opened about me where they made fun of my looks... now that HURTS, because that took me back to my primary school years...

But even an ex of mine said my hair was getting boring and I was like: 'Well, you might think so but it's not your business anymore! You can't even touch it!' I didn't say it out loud, but oh well.

I'm growing it waist-length and everyone is allowed to know!

Angeletti
April 28th, 2010, 03:54 PM
when it comes to things like the color or style I might not care because I'm happy, but lately my family and a few people at work said my ends need cut and that bothers me because I'm trying to grow it out and at the moment have fairy tale ends and feel like they just don't realize all I put into trying to grow my hair long, and then I'll feel all paranoid that by ends look horrible, etc.

yellowchariot
April 28th, 2010, 04:04 PM
I don't care about peoples' opinions. I do listen to advice and such they may want to share. What people think should be done about others' personal being, is their ignorance. When I first started getting negative comments, I would say something just as goofy and ignorant in return.

For example: "You should cut your hair, it doesn't look good long."

My response: "You should stop wearing long earrings, and wear shorter ones instead."

My Response #2: "Your legs are too long, you should shorten them up a bit."

Their Response: "I'm just trying to help you!"
Mine: "Well. . . so am I!" ;)

Grey
April 28th, 2010, 04:27 PM
I'm growing dreadlocks so others opinions can't matter.
If they did then I would probably cry my life away.

hazelnut
April 28th, 2010, 04:31 PM
It really depends on the comment. If the person can possibly find something nice to say about my hair (kudos to them because I can't find a single nice thing to say about it right now) then we're good. If they say something about it being too thin or too fizzy or just generally bad looking (I've had a few guys come up to me and basically say my hair was crap) then we have a problem.

FrannyG
April 28th, 2010, 04:34 PM
It's been a while since I had a negative hair comment, but when I did, it didn't bother me at all. When I was younger and still getting my hair cut into "styles", a negative comment did sting. Not anymore though. I'm happy with my hair.

I admit to really liking real-life hair compliments though. :o

going gray
April 28th, 2010, 05:07 PM
Negative comments on my long hair ALWAYS bothered me, so I'd take it to heart & wear those "trendy" styles. My age was always the factor, too old for long hair! Then I realized that my opinion is the only one that matters when it comes to my hair.

I'm a late bloomer!

luluj
April 28th, 2010, 05:55 PM
Negative comments on my long hair ALWAYS bothered me, so I'd take it to heart & wear those "trendy" styles. My age was always the factor, too old for long hair! Then I realized that my opinion is the only one that matters when it comes to my hair.

I'm a late bloomer!

HA HA!! Hello going gray:waving: Like you, negative comments really hurt my feelings, especially when it comes to my hair. Like most of us here at TLHC I am a tad bit hair obsessed!LOL!! I love my hair long and I love my silver streaks even more, so when I hear a comment like "you are too old to wear your hair long and too young to let it go silver" I am not only hurt but completely confused by such a statement:confused: All that said......grow hair grow!!:happydance::cheer::joy:

Ludde
May 12th, 2010, 11:35 AM
I learned something when I joined LHC; I still am not bothered by people who think my hairstyle is ugly or look unkempt; that is an opinion all and everyone is and are entitled to. However; I do not care for comments about my hair thought of as unclean or moldy, or that my reasons for developing dreads are lame, particularily since noone has asked me for my reasons behind why my hair is dreaded today.

moonlight
May 12th, 2010, 12:16 PM
I think other people's opinion mean something to me...if it totally didn't, I'd have dreds. I've always wanted them but I'm almost 50 and white. My friends and coworkers would think I'm nuts. That, and I'm not sure how I'd henna dreds.

Sammich
May 12th, 2010, 12:37 PM
I am a very very sensitive person (Not to many things but when it is sensitive to me, BANG!), and when someone says something negative about my hair or anything it can make me feel really bad for quite a few days. :p
I am not very easily peer pressured, I can easily move away from peer pressure, yet I choose not to do a few things because otherwise I might be made fun of for example.
But hey, my opinion might change on this in the future once I'm more confident in myself!

Kathie
May 12th, 2010, 01:04 PM
It’s good to know that you're aware that you have great hair! Like Blandine said, I think she was just trying to solicit more money out of you!

I really haven’t had any memorable opinionated comments re my hair... hopefully it will become more distinct and comment worthy as it gets longer:pray:

Tap Dancer
May 12th, 2010, 01:46 PM
I don't value anyone's opinions but my own when it comes to me.

Islandgrrl
May 12th, 2010, 02:33 PM
Frankly, I'm amazed that other people even have an opinion about my hair. But people have opinions about everything, so....

I'm secure with my decision to grow and maintain long healthy hair. If someone has a positive opinion about that, I will thank them and get on with my day. If someone has a negative opinion about it, I will thank them and get on with my day.

If I'm not doing anything illegal, immoral or unethical, then I don't need to worry what anyone else thinks.

So I don't.

Cholera
May 12th, 2010, 03:18 PM
All my life, I've never cared one bit about what someone thought of me aesthetically. Back when I dyed my hair crazy colors, cut it short, and wore very "emo" clothes, I got a lot of compliments. Sure, I liked them, but I didn't really care most of the time.

Actually, I think the only exceptions are my mom's ex-boyfriend (he was like a dad to me), and my boyfriend.

Forever_Sophie
May 12th, 2010, 05:57 PM
I agree, all that matters re: my hair is my happiness with it :) Doesn't matter to me what others think.

As some have stated though, if it were about the condition of my hair, that would concern me. I'm pretty much on top of it with trims/deep conditioning though...

Darkhorse1
May 12th, 2010, 10:33 PM
I'm shocked at some of the stories here---how people feel they have a right to insult your hair...how is that any different than insulting your looks/weight/height or anything else?

I've seen people in my area with very long, lovely hair. Some of these ladies have fairytale ends. I love blunt ends. Would I tell them to trim their ends? NO! Because to me, hair is about personal expression! If they love their hair, then good for them :) I'm not a fan of men with long hair, but I'd never tell guys I've seen with long hair to cut it. Heavens..they have every right to have long hair! Whether someone has nice hair or maybe not so nice, unless someone directly asks me for my input, to me, it's not my place to say anything.


For me? I grew my hair long because it was practical. My hair grows fast and I find it looks better and is much easier to keep longer. If people don't like it? Well, they don't have to deal with it, so I can't see how it affects them :)

Arctic_Mama
May 12th, 2010, 11:37 PM
I am a fairly sensitive person, but in my hair I have always been confident - from an early age I got tons of compliments on the thickness and then-color (wheat blonde) and even when I chopped it a few times growing up, got a perm, dyed it, whatever, I still never got negative comments.

So by the time I DID get a few negative comments (I imagine I'll get more as it becomes more unusually long and less conformist) they just rolled off my back. I KNOW it is healthy and beautiful, even as a confusingly light shade of ashy brown, with lots of waves and flyaways, it still looks far better than any alternative. The older I get the less I care about the opinions of others regarding my looks.

prosperina
May 12th, 2010, 11:53 PM
Generally I don't care and even sometimes flaunt other people's disapproval as a kind of badge of honor--you know it's pretty easy to take an idiot's criticism and turn it around into a justification of your own awesomeness. :p

One time when I did feel hurt by a criticism was about a year and a half ago. I had taken a semester off of school and come back with red hennaed hair. Previously my naturally blonde hair had been bleached just a shade blonder, but I was beginning to be sick of it. Anyhow, I got lots of compliments, but a few rather tacky comments about how my hair was fake and, I by extension was fake. :rolleyes: And really I had no business being a redhead since that was not my natural color (however these people had no idea that my natural color is strawberry blonde). I don't want to just jump to the jealousy explanation, but the biggest culprit was herself a natural redhead. I'd assume she'd get plenty of compliments because her natural color is lovely, but I don't know. I know it sounds petty, but I'm definitely more attractive than she even with "fake" hair, and what she doesn't understand is the main reason for me being more attractive is I don't have an obnoxious personality and I don't treat my coworkers like trash!

terryn
May 13th, 2010, 12:03 AM
Honestly, I want to look good, and I'd like other people to appreciate my hair, but I definitely get that "you don't really know what you are talking about" attitude. I'm more sensitive to what my mom thinks because she has commented on it all my life, and I am sure will continue to comment on it no matter what I do to it. She is the same with my weight, clothes, earrings (my ears are gauged and I recently found my prize pair of bone dangling earrings, which she promptly informed me looked like tusks the minute I walked in the door with them) and whatever else about my appearance is not to her specifications. So, I've started just repeating the same idea to her that will hopefully make it into my head too one day. I just say "Good thing it's not your hair/clothes/body/etc" and do my best to shrug it off.

Other than her, I've heard nothing but good things, so something must be working a little, lol. :) I love the compliments tho, they make me feel like the effort I am putting into this is worth it.

pennylane
May 13th, 2010, 12:07 AM
If someone says it looks great, I'll accept the compliment, but it won't affect me to a great extent. To me it's first and foremost how I feel about my hair. What about you?

It affects me a whole lot. :confused:

People that i care of, people that loves me, when they say my hair or my hairstyle is not nice .... i do something about it, because most of the time (want it or not) they have been right. :)


So, i trust people who loves me!;) :)

ibleedlipstick
May 13th, 2010, 12:48 AM
For me, it not only depends on who it is coming from but also on the frequency at which it is coming.

Such as, if one random stranger asks me if I was going to donate it to LoL, or said my hair was too long/boring/weird/etc. I wouldn't care. It might put me in a bit of a funk for an hour or so, but I would move on. If, say, every time I went out someone said something nasty, it would probably create some sort of complex for me- I am not totally immune.

Close friends and family? One comment from them can be extremely damaging. I wish I could say that their comments and opinions don't affect me, but they do. However, this could be my age playing a part in the equation. I don't know.

EtherealOde
May 13th, 2010, 12:48 AM
I'm shocked at some of the stories here---how people feel they have a right to insult your hair...how is that any different than insulting your looks/weight/height or anything else?

I've seen people in my area with very long, lovely hair. Some of these ladies have fairytale ends. I love blunt ends. Would I tell them to trim their ends? NO! Because to me, hair is about personal expression! If they love their hair, then good for them :) I'm not a fan of men with long hair, but I'd never tell guys I've seen with long hair to cut it. Heavens..they have every right to have long hair! Whether someone has nice hair or maybe not so nice, unless someone directly asks me for my input, to me, it's not my place to say anything.


For me? I grew my hair long because it was practical. My hair grows fast and I find it looks better and is much easier to keep longer. If people don't like it? Well, they don't have to deal with it, so I can't see how it affects them :)Over my life, I have been insulted for my weight, my height, my looks, my hair, my makeup, my lack of makeup, my voice, my clothing, my age, and my personality. All that did was to reinforce my opinion that a lot of people are asshats. People who do those things try to lift themselves up by putting down others, and it is a form of bullying behaviour. It can still hurt when something hits a sore spot that I might be particularly sensitive about, but the truth is that most are complete strangers. And I don't really care about the opinion of someone who means absolutely nothing to me, that I most probably will never see again.The only opinions that really matter to me are mine and my husband's. And the people here, when I ask for opinions. Anyone else can go pound sand up their nether orifices as far as I'm concerned. I am too old to waste my time and energy caring about the opinions of rude, inconsiderate asshats. I have better things to do with my time. :)