PDA

View Full Version : The worst day of my life.



BrightEyes7
March 31st, 2010, 03:05 PM
The other night I was assaulted... I don't want to go into details. It was a very painful experience. Both emotionally and physically.

The worst part is that half of my hair was ripped out... I went from a ii/iii to a i/ii in one combing. My hair was so matted I couldn't even comb it myself, all the hair that had been ripped out was tangled into my hair. My mom had to comb my hair for me. Now my hair feels so thin. And I have bald patches on my scalp, nothing visable but it is there. I filled a sandwich bag full of my hair that shedded, completely full... stuffed full of my hair.:(

It is strange because my whole body is bruised and sore but what I'm most upset about it my hair. And not to mention my scalp is in so much pain I don't even want to comb it.

This is a unexpected and saddening bump in my hair journey.

ETA: Thank you everyone for your outpouring of support. It is really helping me.

To those of you who had mentioned it, yes I am seeking counseling. I am fortunate enough to have a local outreach center that offers free services to victims of violence.

I have a long road ahead of me but I am not alone. I have a wonderful family and friends not to mention all my LHC family here.


I am just so sorry, and I hope you can forgive this chump someday, while still supporting that he gets the full punishment he deserves.
The forgiveness is for your sake, so you don't carry it around too too long.

I have already found forgiveness in my heart because I cannot judge him, no matter what he did to me. That is in God's hands as am I. I know it may not be clear now but God did this for a reason and I will come out a better person because of it!

And yes I kept the hair. The bright side of this situation, I guess, is that I made a rather large rat in one sitting! :D I'm trying to see the positive things right now.

Love you all for being my virtual shoulders to lean on!

eyesofsummer
March 31st, 2010, 03:10 PM
I'm so sorry, BrightEyes7.

Sending lots of hugs and thoughts your way.

Beaglebuddy
March 31st, 2010, 03:14 PM
I don't really know what to say, but I am so sorry you had such a terrible experience!:grouphug:

little_cherry
March 31st, 2010, 03:16 PM
Oh no :( I am so very sorry to hear that this happened to you! *hugs*

melrose1985
March 31st, 2010, 03:16 PM
I"m sorry... My thoughts and prays are with you. I hope you scalp feels better soon.

MissCoco
March 31st, 2010, 03:21 PM
..........

lora410
March 31st, 2010, 03:23 PM
I am sorry to hear what has happened to you. There are time I wonder what is wrong with the human race these days.

SolSara
March 31st, 2010, 03:27 PM
Oh, I'm so sorry for you! :cry: That is just horrible, even without the details I can only imagine the pain. :grouphug:

As long as it hurts, be very gentle. That goes for scalp, emotions and body. Let the healing start before putting any strain on yourself. Healing might hurt, so take it slow enough so you don't need to do it all over.

For the scalp, I would think that something soft and calming might be nice. Personally I think I would have done a very gentle massage with aloe vera gel (or better, let someone who loves me do it) in the evening, and if needed rinsed it out in the morning by dipping my hair in a bucket of luke warm water. Honey is very sticky, but can do great things on small wounds and can be rinsed out with only water. Be careful with the shampoo and test first so you don't end up with an even more sore scalp. And be super gentle with combing, you want to let the remaining hair heal before putting any pressure on the follicles.

To loose so much hair in one go is hard, but it will grow back! Sooner than you think you will have a lot of new growth, and even if it looks awkward at some stages, you can use it to show yourself how much you have recovered and grown after this horrible assault! :grouphug:

SylphideNoir
March 31st, 2010, 03:29 PM
I am so very sorry you have had to go through such a violent experience. My heart hurts for you, truly. I can understand the emotional connection with long hair. When you have grown it long it becomes more than hair. It is a body part, a security blanket, an icon of personal identity, a symbol of sensuality and many more things that are special to each person. To have our bodies abused is somehow more tolerable than the violation of what our hair means to us.

BrightEyes7
March 31st, 2010, 03:42 PM
Thank your everyone for your support... My scalp is just really sore. No open wounds. I washed this morning but all hairstyles hurt. I was just so proud of how thick my hair had gotten and it was all taken away from me in one night. The bruises and pain will fade in a short time but it will take me years to get back to where I was before with my hair.

jera
March 31st, 2010, 03:45 PM
I'm so sorry to hear this but glad that in spite of being assaulted you're able to think about your hair.

Try aloe and chamomile for your bruised scalp. It may help you. Hugs. :) I hope you'll be all right both physically and emotionally. My best thoughts are with ya.

halo_tightens
March 31st, 2010, 03:45 PM
I'm so sorry to hear what happened, BrightEyes7!! It's just unbelievable what people can do sometimes... I can't understand it. I hope you're taking very good care of your entire self right now! Trying to get back to a feeling of "normal" can be so daunting after a violent experience. You know you can lean on all of us here!!

And you know... I'd be terribly upset about my hair too, if I were in your shoes. I mean, being sad about your hair doesn't mean that you're not upset about the other ways in which you were hurt physically and emotionally. Please don't feel bad about grieving for the hair that you lost!

I'll be praying for peace and healing for your body and soul. :grouphug:

shrimp
March 31st, 2010, 03:46 PM
:grouphug:

Arctic_Mama
March 31st, 2010, 03:48 PM
I'm sorry this happened to you, the whole lot. Be gentle with yourself and your hair :(

MandyBeth
March 31st, 2010, 03:58 PM
I'm so sorry! *gentle hugs*

Just to check, has a doctor checked your scalp out? Just to make sure everything is "right" besides just being sore?

I'd vote for anti-inflammatories and a very loose braid or something to keep your hair from tangling.

Islandgrrl
March 31st, 2010, 04:02 PM
I'm so very sorry. :grouphug:

bunnii
March 31st, 2010, 04:06 PM
I'm sorry this happened to you :grouphug:

Peter
March 31st, 2010, 04:06 PM
I'm really, really sorry to hear that... :(

Tangerine
March 31st, 2010, 04:07 PM
I am sorry this has happened to you. Take care :grouphug:

feralnature
March 31st, 2010, 04:19 PM
I pray for your to feel better soon. I am sorry someone did something ugly to you. You did not deserve to be harmed. Pamper yourself and heal. You are strong and cannot be pushed down. Cry if you need to. Know that you will be okay.

Merkaba
March 31st, 2010, 04:24 PM
I'm really sorry to hear that you were hurt like that. It's an unnecessary evil that people, especially women, are constantly having to suffer through.

I wanted to tell you that I got a huge chunk of my hair ripped out last July. Like, it was completely bald, and the area was about as big as a softball. Since then it has grown back in. Taking MSM and hair vitamins has really helped this area as well. Now, even though the hair there is not as long as in other areas it is just as thick. It will definately take time, but it will come back.

Cailie
March 31st, 2010, 04:29 PM
I'm so sorry to hear this :(
my prayers and thoughts go to you
please take care

Hana
March 31st, 2010, 04:31 PM
*big hugs and lots of love*
:flower:

i hope you feel much better soon!

NuclearMosquito
March 31st, 2010, 05:01 PM
You are in my thoughts and prayers. I am so sorry this happened to you.

Toadstool
March 31st, 2010, 05:05 PM
I am so sorry someone has hurt you. I hope you have all the love and support you need.xxxx

DragonLady
March 31st, 2010, 05:05 PM
I'm so sorry! :(

Please tell us the person who did this is on the way to prison?

Rennire
March 31st, 2010, 05:17 PM
How awful! I'm so sorry that somebody would do that to you. People can be so cruel=(
I hope that you start to feel better soon.

sugarpixie10988
March 31st, 2010, 05:22 PM
I'm very sorry that happened to you :(. I hope you start to feel better soon, nobody deserves anything like that to happen to them.

Juliannaissance
March 31st, 2010, 05:24 PM
Oh Geez! That is horrible! I'm sending you hugs! And don't worry, just think happy thoughts, your hair will grow back in no time! :)

TheLuckyLurker
March 31st, 2010, 05:25 PM
I'm really sorry that happened to you. :grouphug:

BrightEyes7
March 31st, 2010, 05:28 PM
I'm so sorry! :(

Please tell us the person who did this is on the way to prison?

He is in jail... to be sentenced soon.

princessp
March 31st, 2010, 05:35 PM
Oh my goodness, how horrible! I wish I knew exactly what to say to you right now to give you even the tiniest bit of light. Please know, we are thinking of you during this recovery time. My thoughts are with you.

cmnt831
March 31st, 2010, 05:42 PM
I'm so very sorry this happened to you. :(

marikamt
March 31st, 2010, 05:46 PM
Not sure what the circumstances are, glad he was caught..... I went thru an attack when I was only a year or two older than you.
The trial was hard.
PM me if you need to talk.

ETA- things will hit you days, months, years later... a therapist will help A LOT..... there is a lot of residual 'crap' that you will deal with.

Altocumulus
March 31st, 2010, 05:54 PM
I'm so sorry this happened to you. :grouphug:

maxzeen
March 31st, 2010, 06:01 PM
Oh BrightEyes7, I'm so sorry what has happened to you. My thoughts go out to you

Fiferstone
March 31st, 2010, 06:05 PM
Hi BrightEyes7, I am so sorry this happened to you. I do hope that he pays for what he did, and I definitely second Marikamt's suggestion. If the place where you work has an employee assistance program (or if your parents have one) you can see someone without it costing you anything. It will DEFINITELY help. The mental/emotional damage can sometimes take quite a while to show up, and no one should have to go through recovery alone.

:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

Take care, I wish you a safe and speedy recovery on all levels.

bytheocean
March 31st, 2010, 06:07 PM
I'm so sorry to hear what happened. Lots of prayers headed your way.

melusine
March 31st, 2010, 06:12 PM
BrightEyes7.. my heart hurts that you went through that, truly. I'm so sorry. I'm so glad you're safe now and that he is in jail.

Please be kind to yourself in every way you can and I'm sorry about your hair. I'm sending healing thoughts to you.

:grouphug:

little_acorn
March 31st, 2010, 06:16 PM
:grouphug: so sorry to hear this - sending lots of positive thoughts your way for a speedy physical and mental recovery

masa_inn
March 31st, 2010, 06:24 PM
BrightEyes7, you did the most important thing - you survived the assault. Your hair will certainly grow back (one of my classmates from high school had a similar experience).

((((((gentle hugs)))))

pennyroyal
March 31st, 2010, 06:29 PM
that is awful! i am so sorry you had to go through that but you will heal in every way. & i bet your hair will grow back even thicker & more beautiful!!! :)

amoulixes
March 31st, 2010, 06:30 PM
I'm so sorry to hear this happened to you :( I hope that the incident was reported. Take care, hair will grow back :)

starlights
March 31st, 2010, 06:45 PM
thats awful what happened to you.
I hope you have friends around you who you can turn to for support.
Its awful when something you love (like your hair) has been tried to be destroyed....
hope you get over this soon.

NiAosSi
March 31st, 2010, 06:49 PM
I'm really sorry that this happened to you. You're in my thoughts. :grouphug:

Shicurls
March 31st, 2010, 06:50 PM
Oh my! I am sending you hugs. I can't think of anything else to ease your pain.

GlassEyes
March 31st, 2010, 06:53 PM
I'm so sorry. ): And it isn't strange that you're upset about your hair. Barring extreme bone-breakage or arterial damage and the like, the rest of the body is fairly resilient and will heal--hair takes longer, even if it isn't something we really need to survive, it still hurts.

Take care, and just know that it'll grow back.

FrannyG
March 31st, 2010, 06:55 PM
I am just so sorry that this happened to you. :grouphug:

Capybara
March 31st, 2010, 06:56 PM
My thoughts and prayers are with you. I hope that you will be filled with peace in the coming days. (((hugs)))

sibiryachka
March 31st, 2010, 07:03 PM
Oh my dear, I'm so sorry, for your awful experience and your hair loss. Talk about adding insult to injury! I wish you a speedy recovery in every way.

bahannas
March 31st, 2010, 07:06 PM
That is horrible. :( But the important thing is that you survived. It could have been much, much worse.

Sending lots of good feelings your way. :blossom:

BranwenWolf
March 31st, 2010, 07:07 PM
I am so very sorry. Your hair is important and part of who you are. I would be very shaken if that happened.
Please take time to heal at your own place and seek some therapy. That is a very terrible thing.

embee
March 31st, 2010, 07:09 PM
Be well! The hair will grow again.

Seeing a counselor may be a very good plan. Best wishes for a thorough healing.

Angela_Rose
March 31st, 2010, 07:23 PM
Oh, honey. I'm so sorry you were subjected to this mess, and I'm sorry you were hurt in any way.
I think seeing a counsellor is probably a good idea. It'll help the healing process.

Barring that, we're here if you need us, and we're all pulling for you in our own ways. Be well and may you heal uneventfully.

gmdiaz
March 31st, 2010, 07:28 PM
I am so sorry that someone hurt you and wrecked your hair.

Sending you all my best lucky stars for a fast healing and loads of love and ice cream.

yellowchariot
March 31st, 2010, 07:29 PM
You will be in my prayers!
I'm glad that the perpetrator is behind bars.

Bethie
March 31st, 2010, 07:34 PM
:grouphug: My heart aches that you had this happen to you. Sending you healing thoughts and prayers.

paperwhite
March 31st, 2010, 07:37 PM
I'm so sorry to hear this :( I hope you recover quickly and fully :grouphug:

Yozhik
March 31st, 2010, 07:51 PM
My deepest sympathy.

I hope you start feeling better soon :flower:

mrs carol
March 31st, 2010, 07:57 PM
I'm sorry for you. I hope you feel better soon. Prayers for your recovery.

walterSCAN
March 31st, 2010, 08:14 PM
I can't begin to let you how sorry I am that this happened... And how glad I am that you are (relatively) ok! ::gentle hugs::

That is so awful and terrifying... I'll be sending good thoughts and wishes that your hair grows back quicker and thicker than before, and the rest of you heals quickly too!

Kristin
March 31st, 2010, 08:18 PM
I am so sorry this happened. My prayers are with you.:flower:

Fractalsofhair
March 31st, 2010, 08:21 PM
Oh gosh! That sucks. At least you'll heal in time, and I hope whoever does it is arrested and punished. Just be gentle with your scalp and yourself for a while.

rachelily
March 31st, 2010, 08:24 PM
I am so sorry! I hope you have a quick recovery, this must be a very terrible experience for you.

xoxophelia
March 31st, 2010, 08:29 PM
I don't know if this was mentioned, but from the posts I read, I didn't see it. What I am understanding, is that you were physically assaulted? I don't think you should sit down and just take it if that is the case. While you are still bruised take yourself and your hair down to a police station and press charges. I wish I had done this in the past..

walterSCAN
March 31st, 2010, 08:36 PM
I don't know if this was mentioned, but from the posts I read, I didn't see it. What I am understanding, is that you were physically assaulted? I don't think you should sit down and just take it if that is the case. While you are still bruised take yourself and your hair down to a police station and press charges. I wish I had done this in the past..

I think she said that he was currently in jail and charges were pending...

xoxophelia
March 31st, 2010, 08:39 PM
I think she said that he was currently in jail and charges were pending...

Good.. sorry if I missed that.

Sister13
March 31st, 2010, 09:10 PM
I wish you peace and justice. You will heal and your glorious hair will grow back. This crime is all about the perpetrator wanting to hurt, wanting to hate wanting control. I've been there.

And I support you recovery.

Resilient woman, your courage is a lesson to us all.

IndigoAsh
March 31st, 2010, 09:12 PM
wow that's terrible, glad you're ok. I would save the hair though, and use it as hair pieces.

LoversLullaby
March 31st, 2010, 09:13 PM
I am so sorry for all that has happened to you. I've never been through something like this, but if you ever need an ear to listen to you, you can always message me. :grouphug: Be strong and get through this, don't be afraid to cry, and seek help. I will be thinking and praying for your safe recovery, both physically and emotionally.

Fillette
March 31st, 2010, 09:14 PM
oh BrightEyes7... I am so so sorry this happened to you. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Sending you tons of hugs and positive energy...

Kiraela
March 31st, 2010, 09:30 PM
As long as it hurts, be very gentle. That goes for scalp, emotions and body.

She said exactly what I was thinking - take care of yourself, and remember, it does take time to heal, physically, mentally, emotionally - allow yourself to hurt, to rage at whomever did this, etc, and know that it will pass. *hug*

MissMandyElizab
March 31st, 2010, 09:45 PM
I am sorry.I know when something happened to me instead of focusing on what happened i focused on my hair.I know it hurts. I am sorry,If you need anything PM me. Sometimes just having someone to yell at helps or talk to.

sherigayle
March 31st, 2010, 09:49 PM
I'm so sorry this happened to you. I hope you are able to heal quickly. Both physically and emotionally.

Wanderer09
March 31st, 2010, 09:50 PM
I am so angry on your behalf. Things like this should just not happen. -_-

Sending positive energy your way. May you find strength and healing. :grouphug:

ericthegreat
March 31st, 2010, 09:57 PM
I am so sorry you were attacked Brighteyes.:(

Right now anything you need to do, whether its let yourself cry, or if you need to smash something or break a plate or act out your anger, please do it. Release any feeling you have right now, just let it all out.

If I could somehow reach out across from my computer screen, I'd give you the biggest hug right now. :grouphug:

Edit: I read thro the rest of the thread, and I see now that the man who did this to you has been arrested. Good for you. Whatever charges he faces, make sure you show him no mercy at all.

Beesweet
March 31st, 2010, 10:30 PM
I don't even know what to say. I think growing and being good to our hair represents such a nice self-care and love -- and to have it ripped out like that is just terrible. It is like someone wrecking a beautiful garden. I am just so sorry, and I hope you can forgive this chump someday, while still supporting that he gets the full punishment he deserves.

The forgiveness is for your sake, so you don't carry it around too too long.

Honestwitness
March 31st, 2010, 10:37 PM
BrightEyes7, I'm just speechless with anguish for you. I know it took courage to tell us about this horrible experience, but I'm so glad you did.

Just the other day, my brother gave me a 2-hour overview of the 2-day self-defense course he teaches. There's a lot to learn, but it's SO empowering.

I think we should all enroll in a self-defense course in our own areas. Let's all make the commitment to do this in honor of BrightEyes7, shall we?

urara12
March 31st, 2010, 11:01 PM
I'm so sorry this happened to you.

aef231
March 31st, 2010, 11:18 PM
I hope you heal well and fully, BrightEyes. Put yourself first for a while: nothing is more important right now than regaining your wellness, physically and mentally. He'll reap his karma, one way or another, now or later. Keep your chin up, cherie. You're stronger than you know, and you WILL come out the other side. I'll pray for you.

LovelyGoddess
March 31st, 2010, 11:33 PM
My prayers and thoughts are with you.

lilravendark
April 1st, 2010, 04:27 AM
deplorable behaviour :sad karma it will come back to him, all wounds heal in time I hope you are healing well

Alia
April 1st, 2010, 07:33 AM
I don't know what to say other than that I wish this had never happened to you. :grouphug:

aef231
April 1st, 2010, 07:44 AM
On another, slightly more negative note, I'll also be hoping that he gets celled with a 6'8" brute who wants a new "girlfriend" :twisted: Perhaps not the most Christian thing to want, but hey: I guess I'm just not that evolved ;)

Nae
April 1st, 2010, 07:47 AM
I wish you healing, for you mind, your body and your scalp. I hope you know how happy we are that you survived to tell us and that we believe, we KNOW that you can recover from this and we will be here supporting you the whole time. You are part of our community and we care when someone hurts one of ours. ((((((gentle hugs)))))))

I am glad that the attacker is in jail. I hope he gets everything that is coming to him.

Melisande
April 1st, 2010, 08:31 AM
This is horrible, and so sad. I wish you healing and full recovery, hair-wise and otherwise. Having professional help is probably a good idea.

Your hair will grow back - you know that. But having it brutally vandalized after you pampered it so much is really beyond horrible. It makes me angry to think about it. I'm glad the perpetrator is in the hands of the justice system.

We will accompany you on every step of your hair recovery, and we will celebrate with you. You are not alone. Your story has touched many hearts. I hope the good wishes and support and prayers can give you some strength and trust in the human nature. There is evil, but there is also much good.

All the best to you.

Nyghtingale
April 1st, 2010, 08:38 AM
I am so sorry this happened to you. I am sending prayers and healing to you.

Unzadi
April 1st, 2010, 08:39 AM
:hugs: I'm sorry you had to go through this. Prayers, thoughts, friendship and support are all here. Do what you have to do to take care of yourself. You will heal.

missmandy
April 1st, 2010, 08:52 AM
All I can say is *hugs*

Liss
April 1st, 2010, 09:14 AM
I'm sorry about what happened to you.
I'm sorry there are people like this in the world
I'm sorry you found yourself in the path of one.

We are all here to support you with your journey to a full recovery with your mind, body, soul and beautiful hair.

dropinthebucket
April 1st, 2010, 09:16 AM
If you feel comfortable talking to a crisis counsellor, it can really help. One of my best friends was assaulted and was dealing with it really well until, well, after a few weeks when the shock had worn off, she began to realize she needed to talk to someone, someone trained. Beyond the body, it was about finding ways to feel safe again in the world. My prayers are with you!

Shimmy
April 1st, 2010, 10:43 AM
I'm sorry........ {{hugs}}

Purdy Bear
April 1st, 2010, 10:54 AM
I am so dreadfully sorry that you have had to endure this. Firstly I would say you are a very brave lady, and you have got through this and you will recover fully. Thank Gawd the awful man was caught.

Secondly I would recommend the following:

. See a therapist to talk through your feelings or write it down in a journal, you can burn it later if you so wish. This way the issue doesnt get stuck to cause problems later.

. I would try either a hot flannel or a cold one on your scalp, or both together (alternate). Traditionally they bring out bruising and lessen the pain.

. I would major treat yourself and your hair. Is there something you hair really loves, Id do that for a bit, and show yourself and your hair how much you love.

Sending lots and lots of prayers and healing thoughts your way.

ravensinger13
April 1st, 2010, 10:58 AM
Sending positive thoughs and gentle hugs your way.

getoffmyskittle
April 1st, 2010, 11:19 AM
Holy crap. I'm so sorry. NOBODY deserves this. :flowers:

I totally understand feeling upset about your hair. I think a lot of us here would feel the same.

You have my best wishes for your recovery. :grouphug:

redwoman
April 1st, 2010, 11:57 AM
Wow, thats a terrible thing to have to endure. I wish you a speedy recovery for mind body and hair.

camara
April 1st, 2010, 12:15 PM
I am terribly sorry you had to make such a horrible experience. :(

Luckysock
April 1st, 2010, 12:20 PM
Oh Hun, I'm so sorry this happened. (hugs)

rchorr
April 1st, 2010, 12:28 PM
Know that we're thinking about you, and sending positive energy your way! I wish you fast regrowth!

RCHORR'

Merewen
April 1st, 2010, 12:51 PM
I'm so sorry! Sending good thoughts and prayers your way.

Tap Dancer
April 1st, 2010, 02:41 PM
I am so sorry to hear that you were hurt. :( I'll keep you in my prayers. :grouphug:


He is in jail... to be sentenced soon.
Thank God for that!!!

Amber Joy
April 1st, 2010, 02:57 PM
I am so sorry that you went through all that. I'll pray for a fast rcovery for you, and hope your hair grows back nice and quickly.

LoveMyLongHair
April 1st, 2010, 03:06 PM
Bright Eyes..................such a soft, warm hug for you from me. In the South, we have a saying that goes, "what you put out on Sunday, comes home on Monday". HIS Monday will come, it's all about Karma and vibes. We are all sending you healing love and sunlight vibes...........HIM on the other hand.........he will rot in his own hell of his own making.

If you need any of us, we are here.

Love, Light and Healing Thoughts,

Lemur_Catta
April 1st, 2010, 03:20 PM
I am so sorry this happened to you. I hope you feel better soon, both physically and mentally. Your hair will grow back, and it will be more beautiful than ever.
I'm sending a big hug :)

elina333
April 1st, 2010, 03:29 PM
Im so sorry to hear about this. I hope you're surrounded by friends and family... :flowers:

BattahZ
April 1st, 2010, 03:38 PM
I'm so, so sorry that you've had to endure such a traumatic experience! You have a wonderful attitude that will undoubtedly carry you through this and make you stronger than before. Big hugs!

Karala
April 1st, 2010, 05:02 PM
I'm so horribly sorry to hear you had to go through such a terrible experience :[ you will heal and be the stronger for it and your hair will grow back... please take very good care of yourself... my heart goes out to you *hugs*

Laylah
April 1st, 2010, 05:10 PM
That's very painful to hear and even worse to experience... I'm sorry that this happened to you, and I will pray for you.

StephanieB
April 1st, 2010, 07:27 PM
I'm so sorry for your pain, BrightEyes7.

Please get some counseling.

I've been raped twice by the same family member, and it took decades of counseling to forgive the cousin himself and the rest of my enabling family. If you know the man, please try to find a way to forgive him earlier than I did. Don't ever let him near you again - just forgive him and move on with your life. Forgiveness does not mean or include forgetting.

You did nothing wrong, and have nothing to be ashamed of.

Trite sounding as this may be - your hair will grow back.
While I know your pain, I also know that it could have been much worse. :grouphug:

long.again
April 1st, 2010, 07:42 PM
I'm so sorry you are going through this. So awful.

You said you kept the hair, if parts aren't too matted, could you braid it into a headband?

Rimi
April 1st, 2010, 11:56 PM
"If your brother sins against you, rebuke him. And IF he repents, forgive him." Luke 17:3

You're under no obligation to be nicer than God. Be strong, be resolute in dealing with the perpetrator. I had to learn this lesson, and I cannot fully express the freedom in it. It's not bitterness or hatred to not forgive someone so loathesome; it's teaches them that there is no forgiveness without repentence. Teach him well.
And be good and gentle to yourself. Peace.

Pagancat
April 2nd, 2010, 12:14 AM
I am so sorry for your pain! My prayers go out to you and I wish you peace on your journey to healing.

Anje
April 2nd, 2010, 12:41 AM
I'm so sorry you're going through all this.

I don't have any advice for dealing with the main consequences of this, but you should look at Monistat to try to help speed the regrowth of your hair, particularly if you have any bald patches. I hope it grows back full and fast for you.

Leela613
April 2nd, 2010, 01:04 AM
I am so sorry this happened to you! :-( I support you recovery.

Robbi Dehlinger
April 2nd, 2010, 01:08 AM
How HORRIBLE!

Glad you and taking steops and I hope they catch this 'clown" and throw the book at him!!

Rhiannon7
April 2nd, 2010, 01:16 AM
OMG! Hugs! I feel for you, know exactly how you may be feeling, i went through the same thing a few years ago (was almost choked to death by an ex-boyfriend.) and it is very important that you did seek counseling, and that you forgive the one who harmed you. but it is also very important that he is apprehended and does not do the same thing to someone else. sending even more hugs. God will judge him and the person who harmed you will be punished, not only by the law but by God too. don't repress anything, talk about it and know that you are safe, and that as you said it is something that you might need to go through for some reason known only to you and God. but you are loved and the hair will grow back, pamper yourself alot more, for a few days i recommend using your fingers to detangle your hair, give it soothing oils and alot of extra pampering. be always aware of where you are and where others are, be a bit paranoid, it's good.

i always have a big ring made of silver on my index finger so if i have to protect myself the ring will make the hit more powerful, also a finger to the eyes is always effective, don't worry you will not poke the eye out, just make the attacker blind for the time necessary for you to run away. and if you need to feel safer by carrying something, i recommend a small device that i always carry with me and keep beside my bed. it is totaly legal and safe for all, but used properly it can disable someone attacking you. it is called a Kubotan, it fits in the palm of your hand and it is also used as a keyring. you hit the person in the throat, the chest or other sensitive places like the inside of the elbow, the wrist, the eye socket, etc. the attacker is disabled and you can run to safety.


Hope you feel safer and better soon, stay positive and know that you are protected by God, and loved by all.