I'm vowing to give up on hair thickness. (Bit of a rant)

[Katurday]

I have always had reasonably thick hair. I never gave it too much thought, aside from complaining about the weight and the thickness making me overheat in the summer. When I joined LHC, I noticed that there is a lot of focus on thickness. Thickness envy, thickness gained, thickness lost etc. I joined the game quickly enough, seeing what I could do to maximize my thickness. Incidentally, I got a shed or two and started feeling insecure. These sheds were normal, but my focus on thickness made me obsessed over every shed hair.

I am absolutely sick of measuring my circumference, and analyzing whether a shed hair is breakage or if it fell out. I am also sick of comparing my hair to those of others. In my class, there is a girl with hair that is at least 5-6 inches of ponytail cir. and has VERY heavy bangs not in the ponytail. I am sick of feeling insanely jealous. I am sick of being shocked that i to ii hair on the boards can be so thick and wonderful. Thickness doesn't matter much in the looking good department. I see it as just another excuse to judge ourselves as not good enough, and I'm giving up on it.

What is the worth of good hair? Said girl with the really thick hair also fries it to the point where its breaking off and the splits are visible (and I gave her a few tips on transitioning to non-straightening, as well as deep treatments with oil, and clarifying and conditioner types; she liked those). Why do members with hair that is a fine and thin fountain of silk complain about it?

I'm giving up circumference measurements, shed hair counts, and overall thickness obsession in favor of my self esteem and overall mental health. Are you with me (and if you're not, how come?)

[little_cherry]

Hi :)

I also gave up on freaking out over shed hairs and measuring the circumference. I concentrate on me and my hairs' overall health. :)

[minnie may]

count me in too!

[ninelifewriter5]

I'm in! My hair changes its thickness depending on the day, the weather, etc. so it's easier to forget about it, I guess. :P

Yay for not caring about thickness!

[SpeakingEZ]

I'm really glad that you're choosing not to obsess over something for the sake of vanity and/or misplaced self-esteem. It's like obsessing over whether you've gained or lost an ounce of weight from one day to the next. It's just not worth the stress.

I, however, measure once a month to monitor my inner health. It's one of the things that tells me how I've been taking care of myself lately. I also think there's a difference between comparing your thickness to that of other people's and comparing it to what your own has been in the past. So as much as I won't let myself obsess over measuring, I don't think there's anything wrong with measuring semi-regularly to keep tabs on it. . . .

[Ravenne]

I never really bothered measuring my circumference after the initial one that told me I was ii. The thought never really crossed my mind. :p I just keep a loose eye on how much comes out during showering and combing and if it's not a shockingly large gob, I don't worry about it. That's good that you're choosing not to stress over it. After all, stress just causes unhealthy hair trends, aye?

[paperwhite]

I'm in :) I don't think that the thickness of my pony tail is really all the accurate because I'm growing out dyed hair that could give an incorrect measurement. I'll start monitoring more closely when the color is gone.

[Kristin]

I never obsessed about the thickness of my hair until I joined LHC, either. Both my mom and I have always shed tons of hair in the shower and still had plenty to spare. Since joining, I find myself counting shed hairs and, like others, checking to see if hairs are shed or broken. I agree that it is time to stop the insanity. I'm in. (At least until my next shower, lol.:o)

[mellie89]

I'm in. I keep getting to almost-BSL and cutting back to APL because I get self-conscious about the thickness. I'm just going to grow it and stop worrying about every little shed hair.

I love my hair and I know that it's unrealistic to expect a 4" ponytail circumference with such fine hair.

[martinxt]

I'm in as well...worrying and obsessing never yields positive outcomes.

[Bethie]

Count me it!

[RoseRedDead]

I never really bothered measuring my circumference after the initial one that told me I was ii. The thought never really crossed my mind. :p I just keep a loose eye on how much comes out during showering and combing and if it's not a shockingly large gob, I don't worry about it. That's good that you're choosing not to stress over it. After all, stress just causes unhealthy hair trends, aye?

This is also my philosophy when it comes to hair thickness. :) I tend to be OCD about a lot of things, and I've worried about this before, but the longer my hair gets, the more I'm just sitting back and letting it be.

Right now I'm focusing on my overall health - healthy body, mind, and spirit are more important than crazy-thick hair to me.

[IStand4u]

Im in! I don't wanna worry about it anymore!

[bumblebums]

I blame the LHC for even putting the thought of measuring ponytail circumference in my head :)

I agree that it can be a very unhealthy obsession. I try to enjoy my hair for what it is and give the measuring tape a rest. So I am with you.

[Beaglebuddy]

I am in too. Although, I have not been one who has really spent much time in measureing.
But I am tired of feeling my hair is not good enough or thick enough. In fact, I have decided to quit obsessing so much on my hair and am trying to cut back a little on LHC time because it has made me more obsessed. Just a little, though.

[jivete]

Why do members with hair that is a fine and thin fountain of silk complain about it?


For me, it's because any small amount of damage is so readily visible. My thinish/fine hair looks damaged really easily and tends to be hard to grow and keep looking nice.

That being said, I try not to obsess or complain about my hair's thickness. Keeping it healthy will make it as thick as possible and even if that's only a 2.5" circumference, it's all I'm going to get so I may as well accept and enjoy it.

[missmandy]

I'm not in or out either way. I think that thickness is a way to measure the health (or condition) of one's hair. Once you know how thick your hair is naturally, it's easy to see if you're shedding a LOT, and you can tell if that's normal or not.

[lapushka]

I'm really glad that you're choosing not to obsess over something for the sake of vanity and/or misplaced self-esteem. It's like obsessing over whether you've gained or lost an ounce of weight from one day to the next. It's just not worth the stress.

I think the hairtyping system is only there as a guideline, something you establish out of curiosity and then naturally move away from. I find it odd that it could occupy someone's mind daily. I mean, one could start obsessing over lots of things that weren't put in place to obsess over. I think the main issue here is obsession. It's not the system that's at fault.

[Roseate]

I think the hairtyping system is only there as a guideline, something you establish out of curiosity and then naturally move away from.

I agree. It's just there to establish what general kind of hair you've got. It's helpful in determining if other posters are close to you in type, but I don't think it's supposed to be a value judgement at all.

I measured my circumference a couple times when I got to LHC, to see what category I was in, and that's the end of it for me. I guess if I have a massive shed I'd measure again, just to see if I've dropped a category.

I don't measure my length either; photos are easier for me to see growth, and that way I don't focus on the number, and stalls aren't as noticeable if I'm not counting every millimeter.

[freznow]

I go by looks and feel rather than numbers. I still get envious and hurt when somebody points out to me, in their infinite curiosity for comparison, that their hair may be shorter but it's a ton thicker than mine. But other than that I try not to pay attention to it, numberwise. Sometimes I'll mess with my braids trying to make them look thicker, but there isn't much you can do in this area of hairness unless there's something wrong in the first place.

[MandyBeth]

I don't measure my length either; photos are easier for me to see growth, and that way I don't focus on the number, and stalls aren't as noticeable if I'm not counting every millimeter.

I've tried measuring, and I list my guesses so I can have an idea on when I should roughly get somewhere - like I know with my current plan, I'll hit APL in a year. So thus if I'm stalled at some point between SL and APL, I'm not going to worry until it's at this time next year, and by then I'll probably have some plan for how long to BSL and then I'll worry about that when it rolls around.

But my hair ISN'T whatever length I get when I measure over the top of my head. That adds probably 3 or 4" really, and when you are starting with 8" hair, 4" is a HUGE jump and it's not right.

And I'm refusing to measure thickness anymore. There is a lot of it, it doesn't behave, and it doesn't matter if I suddenly have a 2" diameter to my ponytail, it's still not going to behave, and 2" with fine hair is still a lot.

[Arctic_Mama]

Nope, not in! And since you asked why...

My hair defaults at a certain thickness, and I have a certain loss with my natural sheds. I have neve counted shed hairs or looked for breakage, but I do keep a loose eye on my measurement and don't obsess too much. And just yesterday, keeping an eye on my thickness helped me be aware of a major medical problem I didn't figure out any other way. Of course, I'm self conscious NOW because my hair is falling out, but I also know what my normal circumference is and that I'll get back to that in a year or so, with some taper to show for this episode.

I have never obsessed over thickness, so it's never been a problem for me. And knowing my healthy baseline (about 4.5 inches) helped me diagnose when something was seriously wrong.


So I'm with you on not obsessing, but I can still measure my circumference twice a year and not be a nutcase about it :lol:

I hope this challenge helps you, though!

[Katurday]

I think the hairtyping system is only there as a guideline, something you establish out of curiosity and then naturally move away from. I find it odd that it could occupy someone's mind daily. I mean, one could start obsessing over lots of things that weren't put in place to obsess over. I think the main issue here is obsession. It's not the system that's at fault.
Its like saying ads depicting abnormally thin models aren't the main cause of self esteem drops in women. Sure, the hair typing system is not evil in itself, it never says i or ii or iii is the best thing, however the widespread amount of comments like "ugh my taper" and "my braid is so teeny weeny" and "OMG YOUR HAIR IS SO THICK" just makes me believe the insecurity and negativity aren't too healthy.

[ZaBasDa]

I like measuring the thickness of my hair. I don't measure often, but I do measure to keep tabs on several of my medical problems. I know if I get conditioner A and B under control then my hair thickness should increase because I've had a shed related to A,B, and C. And if it doesn't increase and continues to get thinner then I need to have C checked out and reevaluate A and B too. I don't mind the thinner hair, I just mind the reasons I got thinner hair.

[Ivy~Rose]

Great idea, I'm newish and only since I joined have I started looking at other people's hair thinking, "Wow, so thick, what am I doing wrong?" and being semiconcerned about my hair thickness.

I'm glad you're deciding not to worry about it, I won't worry either! I'll just trust that as long as I'm taking good care of my hair and staying healthy, it'll reflect that.

I have noticed that only washing my hair every other day, and just massaging my scalp with shampoo, not crunching my whole hair on top of my head, has helped a lot overall. Yay!

[ChloeDharma]

Oh i've tried this not caring attitude and embracing whatever my hair naturally wants to do as equally beautiful to whatever blah blah blah.....but OMG it's so hard! My hair used to be a nice thickness, not so thick that a ponytail could compete with a limb in circumference, but a thickness i liked that gave me nice braids, little taper, grew like a weed and shone like glass......i was known for my hair and always got compliments on it.
Like a previous poster i got ill and lost alot of thickness and i admit it hit me quite hard, i've been struggling to gain it back. But, you are right, the worrying and obsessing becomes so draining. But it's hard to maintain feeling happy with yourself when you get so many messages about how bad or inferior fine thin hair is when long. I have fairytale ends too and i know many people would think my hair should be cut because being thin haired and the taper goes against everything we are told constitutes "good hair".
I have to admit, having been a member here for about 5 and a half years now i do feel that attitudes seem to have changed a bit and thin hair with tapered ends does seem more frowned upon than it used to be.
So, i think it's great you have come to this conclusion......i'm trying to do the same, and i admit my condition and shine i'm happy with which does help, and i've had a few compliments lately when my hair has been down that took me by surprise but also showed thin fine hair can get compliments and be considered "good hair".

[jaine]

LHC does seem kind of pro-thickness (and anti-layers too while we're on the topic) ... those were definitely among my first impressions here and it was puzzling.

Luckily I haven't succumbed to the thickness envy yet! :)

If anything I have the opposite problem, wishing my hair were just smaller. My head has a rather large circumference so feel like I need flat thin hair to balance it out!

[marla]

I'm not sure how people go about measuring their thickness anyway. After I wash it and air dry it and poof it out with my hands, the ponytail circumference is pretty big. But a day or so later when I'm ready for a wash, the circumference has decreased markedly.

When are people doing their measuring?

Oh and if people are saying they are measuring 4 inches while wet, then I'm going to jump off a cliff :)

[Arctic_Mama]

I usually measure twice, just to see if there's a difference. Once, on freshly washed but bone dry hair, and once before washing again. Usually I lose a bit of poof when it is dirty so it compacts down more. I put my hair in a tight ponytail and measure right below the band :)

[NuclearMosquito]

I had a similar obsession when I first joined LHC, only it was with the waviness of my hair. I was 2a or 2b and tried really hard to convince my hair it was 2c. I thought, the curlier the better. I remember making topics asking if people thought my hair was 2c, even.

In the end, I was a 2b. Now it seems I am even less, as my waves comb out so easily and most days I comb them and wear my hair relatively straight (hence the 1c/2a). I am not going to stress about making it more wavy this time. If, through better care, the waves increase, so be it. If they don't, big whoop. That's my challenge. :)

[ambism]

I'm not sure how people go about measuring their thickness anyway. After I wash it and air dry it and poof it out with my hands, the ponytail circumference is pretty big. But a day or so later when I'm ready for a wash, the circumference has decreased markedly.

When are people doing their measuring?

Oh and if people are saying they are measuring 4 inches while wet, then I'm going to jump off a cliff :)

Same here. A couple of days after washing, I go from 3" to 1.5" and it kills me! :justy:
So, I don't bother anymore. It's enough that I get sad when a few hairs fall of my head when I'm washing and/or brushing... but a thin circumference is a real downer.

[Mamakash]

We must we must we must increase our bust!:D
Oh, sorry . . . wrong thread.

I can't see being too worried about the circumference of my ponytail . . . while proper nutrition and tender loving hair care can improve thickness/hair density, it isn't going to change genetics. I could see checking my measurement once a year(because any changes in diet or care will take time to grow in) but nothing more than that. It's not something to worry about.

[aef231]

I actually haven't even measured my circumference. My hair is neither especially thin nor especially thick, and I've come to appreciate it after a lifetime of envy over my cousins'/mother's/aunts' ridiculously thick manes. I didn't get that trait, and that's ok. My hair may not be as thick as theirs, but it's much softer :)

[teela1978]

I've tried measuring, and I list my guesses so I can have an idea on when I should roughly get somewhere - like I know with my current plan, I'll hit APL in a year. So thus if I'm stalled at some point between SL and APL, I'm not going to worry until it's at this time next year, and by then I'll probably have some plan for how long to BSL and then I'll worry about that when it rolls around.

But my hair ISN'T whatever length I get when I measure over the top of my head. That adds probably 3 or 4" really, and when you are starting with 8" hair, 4" is a HUGE jump and it's not right.

And I'm refusing to measure thickness anymore. There is a lot of it, it doesn't behave, and it doesn't matter if I suddenly have a 2" diameter to my ponytail, it's still not going to behave, and 2" with fine hair is still a lot.
Just to check... you realize its circumference we use as a measure, not diameter right? A 2 inch diameter ponytail would have over 6 inches of circumference and be a very thick iii.

I don't really think about my thickness that much. My hair was a bit thinner when I was dying it, but over my life its always been about the same thickness. I was pleased when I measured my thickness after growing out my hair dye and it was thicker though (although still in the ii classification).

I usually use the i, ii, iii system more for figuring out what people with my hairtype are doing with their hair. I can probably manage styles similar to what other 2a ii folk around waistlength can do, and any styling tips or haircare plans they have are likely to work for me as well.

[little_cherry]

I probably shed much more stressing about my hair!

[SpeakingEZ]

Nope, not in! And since you asked why...

My hair defaults at a certain thickness, and I have a certain loss with my natural sheds. I have neve counted shed hairs or looked for breakage, but I do keep a loose eye on my measurement and don't obsess too much. And just yesterday, keeping an eye on my thickness helped me be aware of a major medical problem I didn't figure out any other way. Of course, I'm self conscious NOW because my hair is falling out, but I also know what my normal circumference is and that I'll get back to that in a year or so, with some taper to show for this episode.

I have never obsessed over thickness, so it's never been a problem for me. And knowing my healthy baseline (about 4.5 inches) helped me diagnose when something was seriously wrong.


So I'm with you on not obsessing, but I can still measure my circumference twice a year and not be a nutcase about it :lol:

I hope this challenge helps you, though!

Arctic Mama, this is the perfect example of what I meant in my earlier post. The measurement shouldn't be a self-esteem issue, but a health and wellness issue. . . . But I personally measure once a month when I'm doing my other measurements and trimming.

[Rhiannon7]

I obsess on the length, not the thickness. i've never had thick hair.....always had baby fine hair even though a few times i've been told i have so much hair. (told that during perms, ) but i also have chosen to forget about thickness and worry about falling hair. did a circumference twice, might do it once a year to keep up on if i am loosing too much hair or not, but that's it. shedding is always natural and if i have breakage, there is not much more i can do except take even more obsessive care of my hair.

I actually had my last little freak out last weekend when i washed and i saw that so much hair had been shed, ( 2 hands full) then i remembered i had spent 23 days without washing and 3 days without brushing out braid and sighed. it was simply accumulated shed hair.

So good for all who have stopped obsessing on thickness and decided to just love your hair and give it what it needs instead. it is better to not obsess about anything, too much stress can actually cause hair to fall out more often, so the less stress you have the better.

[bumblebums]

Since there seems to be some confusion about properly measuring your hair for hair typing, here's the link to the "official LHC instructions": http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/vbjournal.php?do=article&articleid=164

I also want to add this. Hair thickness changes seasonally--we shed more during some parts of the year than others. This probably depends on where you live, but you have to keep that in mind. Don't immediately assume that you have a health problem just because you suddenly lost some hair in the spring. My dog does this twice a year--if I measured the circumference of her tail, I'd go crazy and go bankrupt from vet bills :) I do not wish to diminish anyone's problems, since hair loss can be a symptom of serious illness, but it will never be the only symptom.

Also, wurly vs. straight vs. tightly curly hair behaves differently throughout the wash cycle when it comes to puffiness and thickness. My hair falls into the wurly category, 2c, and so it makes absolutely no sense to worry about thickness, since it changes even throughout different parts of the day, and it depends on humidity and other things.

And that's why I do not obsess over thickness. Does the hair look good? Are you happy with it? Great. Put away that measuring tape now.

[lapushka]

Its like saying ads depicting abnormally thin models aren't the main cause of self esteem drops in women. Sure, the hair typing system is not evil in itself, it never says i or ii or iii is the best thing, however the widespread amount of comments like "ugh my taper" and "my braid is so teeny weeny" and "OMG YOUR HAIR IS SO THICK" just makes me believe the insecurity and negativity aren't too healthy.

Good point. However, everything has its advantages and disadvantages. There's disadvantages to iii hair too. I mean... the sheer weight of it, esp. when it gets longer, the trouble of finding barrettes or hairtoys that fit and don't break. Getting asked to have it thinned out (not everyone thinks it's wonderful). It's not all peachy in iii-land.

[teela1978]

Good point. However, everything has its advantages and disadvantages. There's disadvantages to iii hair too. I mean... the sheer weight of it, esp. when it gets longer, the trouble of finding barrettes or hairtoys that fit and don't break. Getting asked to have it thinned out (not everyone thinks it's wonderful). It's not all peachy in iii-land.
The time it seems to take to dry is one thing that keeps me thankful for somewhat thinner hair. I can wash my hair and have it be dry in less than an hour. The idea of waiting hours and hours for my hair to dry sounds awful. I would definitely put off washing longer if that were the case :)

[UltraBella]

BUMP !
So I realize I am really *really* late commenting on this thread, but it was very interesting to read ! Everyone seems to have something that they have anxiety over when it comes to their hair and although mine is not thickness, I have always been jealous of the Bollywood female stars with their long black shiny hair. I think having a slight envy of something you can't obtain is normal. I love my hair, but I can't possibly ever grow a head of Indian hair so therefor I want to !

[Chrissy]

I've never been one to count shed hairs. I know some people swear by it. Too me it sounds boring!!!! :) I think I've only once measured my pony circumference once when I first joined here many moons ago. I still measure length but not every month like before.

I've come to like the benign neglect thing. I do take care of my hair. I've recently stopped Pantene and am now using Mane and Tale or Suave Naturals. I'm trying air drying instead of blow drying. I do still blow dry sometimes but not till it's totally dry. I've also given up hair spray and use an Aloe Vera gel to keep my halo in check.

Anyway............this is my long winded way of saying I do the best I can to care for my 1aii hair and not obsess if it's not perfect. I am hair style challenged so I need to work on that one. I just sometimes don't have the patience to try some of the styles cause I get frustrated since my hair is very slippery.

Sorry for such a long answer but I am a big time talker!!!! :)

[Bene]

I measured the circumference of my hair the one time, just so I could fill out the option in the profile thingy. I've never actually counted how much hair I shed. I couldn't begin to imagine developing any sort of anxiety about thickness. Never thought to examine my shed hair either. If it naturally shed or broken, the damage is done already. Perhaps if I start to look like the Crypt Keeper, then I'll pay attention, but not a second before :)


I'll admit to obsessing about the overall condition of my length and scalp, and looking for ways to wean my hair off of products and manipulation.

[chopandchange]

Did you ever stop to think that the people whose thick hair you envy might be envying something about YOUR hair?

I happen to be a thick-haired person, and it annoys me that my hair is so thick that it doesn't lie flat. I doubt it ever will. It just goes POUF, because there's so much of it. So I envy the people with slick, flat hair - who in turn are probably envying me for my "volume." :rolleyes:

I don't think there's any point to obsessing over wanting thicker hair, because it's not something you have any control over. With patience and time, and by simply not cutting it, you can control length, but not thickness. Some people simply have more hairs than others!

Let's just get over ourselves, and let our hair GROW and all have different, unique heads of hair!

Cue dancing cheese man ------> :cheese:

[Arianwen]

I think I measured my ponytail circ. once, when I joined LHC way back when and haven't since. I don't count shed hairs, don't look to see if there's a root at one end etc etc. I do check around my hairline to see if I'm losing hair there on occasion though....

[spidermom]

Maybe it's because I've got relatively thick hair, but this is one thing I've never worried about. It absolutely amazes me that people will post "yesterday I shed 217 hairs, today 194" and so forth. It would never occur to me to count hairs. I remember being startled by a heavy shed I experienced in 2005, but I didn't count them or save them or anything, merely took a look at my health habits as a whole and improved what I could.

[twilight_faerie]

I've never been one to count shed hairs. I know some people swear by it. Too me it sounds boring!!!! :) I think I've only once measured my pony circumference once when I first joined here many moons ago. I still measure length but not every month like before.

I'm with you on this one. I've also only measured my ponytail circumference once, when I joined LHC, and haven't since. I never realized that the number of hairs I shed everyday mattered much till I joined, and you know what? I still really don't care all that much. I lose TONS of hair in the shower, and a bunch more every time I comb, but I don't lose enough to make my hair super thin, and I haven't noticed any bald spots, so...I don't care. I don't need a 5' ponytail circumference; all that hair would probably drive me crazy anyway. I'm perfectly content with my ii thickness. I'd rather focus on improving my hair condition than cry over shed hairs. :)

ETA: I think I'd go out of my mind if I tried counting my shed hairs. I'd probably lose count every 5 seconds and have to start all over a hundred times. No, thank you. :p

[Bonkers57]

I'm a late-comer to this thread also. If I allowed myself to get bummed over my fine hair, I'd be miserable all the time! Life is too short.

I've measured ponytail circumference maybe twice. And I've never lost much hair, so I'm not worried about it.

teela1978:
I LOVE how my hair dries so quickly when I let it air dry! We've had several 100-degree+ days this summer, so I'm grateful for my "lightweight" hair on that account. :) It's still short enough that I have to style it occasionally. When I blow-dry it (on warm, not hot), it's a different story - it seems to take FOREVER. (That's why I do it only once in a while :D)

chopandchange:
All too often people want what they don't have. That's why I've wished I had hair like Alex Kingston's! ;) But in the end we have to work with what we have, accept, and better yet even enjoy it.

[Clarisse]

I'm obsessing over hair thickness too, and I don't know what to do about it. I feel that thick hair = being beautiful, and I'll never be iii. Some days it feels thick, som days it feels thin, but it'll never be truly thick. Not with vitamins, not with work-out, not with scalp massage. I can't alter my genes. I didn't start obessing over thickness til I joined here, and in the periods where I'm not on this site, I obsess less about it. I can get a good body by working out and eating well, I can get long hair by caring for my hair and not cutting it, I can get a tan, I can get pale, but I can't make my fine hair M or C or my ii hair iii.

[Arianwen]

I'm obsessing over hair thickness too, and I don't know what to do about it. I feel that thick hair = being beautiful, and I'll never be iii. Some days it feels thick, som days it feels thin, but it'll never be truly thick. Not with vitamins, not with work-out, not with scalp massage. I can't alter my genes. I didn't start obessing over thickness til I joined here, and in the periods where I'm not on this site, I obsess less about it. I can get a good body by working out and eating well, I can get long hair by caring for my hair and not cutting it, I can get a tan, I can get pale, but I can't make my fine hair M or C or my ii hair iii.

There are many advantages to having ii hair thickness. Besides, if we all had iii and C hair wouldn't that be boring?!

You cannot alter your genes, that is true. I think you should strive for hair acceptance and love your hair because it is YOURS and no one else's. :grouphug:

[Solange]

I want to stop obsessing, but I don't feel I'm capable of it. Why? Because I used to have ultra thick hair, I don't anymore, and so I feel like I lost something. I want it back. If I never had thick hair, maybe it wouldn't bother me so much. It's hard to ignore when people comment on how my hair "isn't that thick", or "you used to have thick hair, didn't you?".

[Bonkers57]

I see your point :( I feel that way when I look in the mirror and see I'm a lot heavier than I used to be and that my eyes are too old and wrinkly to wear eye makeup like I used to. I loved playing with shadows and liners and all. Oh well, my glasses pretty much hide my eyes now anyway.


I want to stop obsessing, but I don't feel I'm capable of it. Why? Because I used to have ultra thick hair, I don't anymore, and so I feel like I lost something. I want it back. If I never had thick hair, maybe it wouldn't bother me so much. It's hard to ignore when people comment on how my hair "isn't that thick", or "you used to have thick hair, didn't you?".

[30isthenewblack]

We must we must we must increase our bust!:D
Oh, sorry . . . wrong thread.

:rollin:You're a funny girl. I've always had super thick hair which I took for granted and after doing all sorts of things to it, its now quite thin. I'm not obsessed by it in terms of measuring the thickness but I'm going to try and make it thicker by using henna and taking vitamins like MSM and biotin (suggested to me by Speckla). I was in denial about the condition of my hair and this forum made me realise that I need to do something to fix it. Maybe my hair will never be thick but I will feel having tried to do something about it. At the end of the day as Heidi234 said to me, you have to work with what you have :flowers:

[lpsqt60]

I'm so in, I think I kind of end up hating myself for not having as thick of hair as someone else when it's so silly to be thinking that. So I'm with you, I want to keep my self esteem:cheese:.

[MissManda]

I don't worry about ponytail circumference in terms of comparing myself to others in hopes of my hair magically getting thicker, because it is what it is. Just as others here have said, I do like to look at the i, ii, and iii categories to see which hairtypes can do which styles at a specific length and I always feel so happy when I find someone who is a hairtwin or a haircousin so I can learn from them.

My issue with worrying about ponytail circumference lies with most peoples' perception of my fairly straight hair. Even though I know my hair is thick, the general population looks at it, points, and declares it "thin" because it is not wavy or curly. My DBF has roughly the same ponytail size as me, but his hair is wurly and it bothers me how people say they envy his thick hair and turn to look at me and say things like "Wow, your hair is so thin you must be jealous of your boyfriend, but maybe doing his hair for him every day is the next best thing." Um, I have just as much hair as he does and my hair can get just as huge as his when I make my hair curly or wavy and you probably wouldn't tell DBF that if he had straighter hair like me. :rolleyes:

I measure my ponytail to remind myself that my hair is not thin at all and I am sick of worrying about it. I remember when I was a child I never had a problem with people calling my hair "thin" because I knew they were wrong and because I knew that's just how my hair was and I was fine with it and kept loving my long hair. When I moved in with my grandmother, she wouldn't stop giving me flack because my hair did not resemble an Afro, but for a long time i thought she was being ridiculous for telling me about the things that I "should" want, such as curls, uber-volume/helmet-hair, and iv-type hair and that I should do all of these damaging things to make my hair look "better." I was such a wise child and I am sad that I eventually caved into all of those negative comments. I want to not care about measuring and I want to feel happy about my thickness without worrying about the numbers to "prove" that it is thick because I know it is not healthy. I want to stop caring about what people think of my hair's thickness and I want to stop measuring for at least a month and keep going from there.

I was browsing the LHC Archives yesterday when I stumbled across this thread (http://archive.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=76398), which really helps me feel better because now I know I am not the only person who occasionally gets the "You don't have much hair," comments. I hope this will help others with similar issues.

[anthonyswife]

I'm already in. :)

I actually shed by handfuls (seriously, I have fistfuls of hair after my regular washes that I have to collect lest they stop up the drain) and that's perfectly normal for me. I've always shed that much and have never really thought about it before, because my hair is perfectly capable of keeping up with how much I shed, in fact all that new hair is the cause of my excessive frizz (which is something I realized only recently). My hairdresser has even commented how much I shed, but that it doesn't seem to affect the thickness at all. And my hair is even thicker now because I've stopped layering.

So all that to say, I think unless you're shedding an excessive amount that isn't normal for you as a person, you really shouldn't worry about shedding, and I'm glad this thread was started. :)