Highlights... Again!

[elina333]

Ok so I have an appointment at the salon today. Im having highlights again. Last time was january 5th and I told myself I would go at least 3-4 months before next time. If I ever would do them again... But I have a really important job interview on tuesday and I just dont feel comfortable with my 1.7 in. dark roots... :rolleyes: So Im gonna get them done. Again.

[xoxophelia]

You could also just color your hair the same color as your roots with a semipermanent color?

[elina333]

You could also just color your hair the same color as your roots with a semipermanent color?

Yes but the problem is I dont feel like "myself" in any other color than blonde... I've been blonde all my life. So I guess I just have to deal with the fact that Im gonna be damaging it... :shudder: :lala: :meditate:

[Dreams_in_Pink]

It's interesting how one can feel "not herself" in their natural colors...I'll never understand that :rolleyes:

[elina333]

It's interesting how one can feel "not herself" in their natural colors...I'll never understand that :rolleyes:

I was blonde as a little girl and when I reached my teens I started to get darker, and I also started with the bleach. So I have ALWAYS been blonde, which is why I dont feel like myself in any other color :hmm: Especially not my rat-brownish-dirty-blonde hue... :shudder:

[Anlbe]

It's interesting how one can feel "not herself" in their natural colors...I'll never understand that :rolleyes:

Depends on what you mean by natural. I know from one of your other threads that you want to stop the sun bleaching your hair - but that's natural. Like elina I was blonde, blonde until my teens but now it grows a dark brown and then completely changes colour on it's journey from root to tip despite the fact I wear hats every day and mostly have my hair up. I hate the dark roots, I suppose it would be natural to leave them but it just looks like I'm permanently growing out hair dye, so I turn them blonde. I did once dye the tips to match the roots. Opps it really wasn't me. I have such pale powdery skin that even with blonde hair I can look quite goth, with brown hair oh my goodness! Shame that goth isn't my style.

[Dreams_in_Pink]

Depends on what you mean by natural. I know from one of your other threads that you want to stop the sun bleaching your hair - but that's natural. Like elina I was blonde, blonde until my teens but now it grows a dark brown and then completely changes colour on it's journey from root to tip despite the fact I wear hats every day and mostly have my hair up. I hate the dark roots, I suppose it would be natural to leave them but it just looks like I'm permanently growing out hair dye, so I turn them blonde. I did once dye the tips to match the roots. Opps it really wasn't me. I have such pale powdery skin that even with blonde hair I can look quite goth, with brown hair oh my goodness! Shame that goth isn't my style.

I used to have lighter hair as a child too; last year i had my hair dyed exactly that color and now i totally hate my dyed ends (reddish light brown). Seeing my naturally dark roots, those light brown ends don't feel like myself. I guess that's a matter of getting used to a certain color then?

by the way, yes i'd like to keep my color unchanged because i think my "natural" color is what comes right out of my roots. Sun-bleach, in my opinion, is not a natural color, as far as virgin hair goes :)

[Capybara]

Is there any way you could put your hair up to camouflage the roots? What about a side braid around your crown? You could make it look very professional and chic :)

When I had highlights, I had awful roots until they grew out to about 3-4 inches, then they blended in with the rest of my hair (presumably from the highlights fading.) Mine were done with a home highlight kit, though, so I don't know if salon quality highlights would do the same. Maybe if you let them grow out a bit more you will be more comfortable.

Good luck with the job interview! :)

[Addy]

Sun-bleach, in my opinion, is not a natural color, as far as virgin hair goes :)

How is it not natural? The sun naturally comes up everyday. We naturally have to go out and get things done. The hair naturally lightens without chemically altering it's state. It's natural virgin hair. You can't stop it from happening because it's natural.

Natural=nature. If you find a way to escape this natural process after you've achieved 100% virgin hair... please, let me know. :)

[Anlbe]

I used to have lighter hair as a child too; last year i had my hair dyed exactly that color and now i totally hate my dyed ends (reddish light brown). Seeing my naturally dark roots, those light brown ends don't feel like myself. I guess that's a matter of getting used to a certain color then?

by the way, yes i'd like to keep my color unchanged because i think my "natural" color is what comes right out of my roots. Sun-bleach, in my opinion, is not a natural color, as far as virgin hair goes :)

I think know what you mean, it's like the colour our hair grows out of the scalp is it's purest form. I try to stop the sun tanning my skin and bringing out my freckles, and if my hair would cooperate I might try to keep my hair its original colour too.
I think what most of us hate is dark roots (although for a short while the fashion industry was trying to persuade us it was a 'look' a la carrie in sex and the city, which I found ick) and obviously damaged ends.

[MonikaHa]

I am on exactly the same boat... my hair was white when I was younger, and with age started getting darker, and darker.. And now, after having a baby, I don' feel like me any more, not only the color has changed again, but also the texture.
I totally understand not feeling like yourself with your natural color.

[Dreams_in_Pink]

How is it not natural? The sun naturally comes up everyday. We naturally have to go out and get things done. The hair naturally lightens without chemically altering it's state. It's natural virgin hair. You can't stop it from happening because it's natural.

Natural=nature. If you find a way to escape this natural process after you've achieved 100% virgin hair... please, let me know. :)

So, those women who spend all their time out in the summer sun to get a tan are more natural than those who don't tan? :D

Sun's the destructive force of nature. Preventing its harmful effects does not really make us any less natural IMO.

[melikai]

To the OP: you could try to at least lessen the damage by coating your hair in coconut oil before getting the highlights done, if you can convince your hairstylist. Also, be sure that they are only applying it to your roots.

I'm afraid that if you ever seriously want to stop highlighting, you will inevitably have to go through an awkward stage, especially if you don't want to darken your length to blend in better. However, if you don't want to embrace your "rat-brownish-dirty-blonde hue", as you put it, then you might as well continue with getting highlights, and just try to minimise the inevitable damage.

[justgreen]

I can understand where the OP is coming from. I don't want to embrace my semi-dark-light auburn with few grey stragglers because it doesn't go with my complection. Both parents were/are blonde, but father's mother was a dark auburn. I got my mother's olive skin, bright green eyes and my grand's hair. I was blonde as a child, etc. Always dyed my hair as a teen, never went blonde until I was in my twenties..... that was my ah-ha! moment.

[Leena7]

Seeing as how I have had every hair color under the sun in my short 19 years, I don't think all people necessarily feel most like themselves with the color that grows out of their scalp. For me, its all teenage experimentation. I learned that although my hair color is actually medium brown I like how I look best with red hair. It makes my eyes look very green. They look much browner when I have my natural hair color, highlights or all over blonde. I can see how some people feel less like "themselves" with their natural hair color because they have had another color for such a long time and they feel that not natural color is more flattering. However, part of the reason I change my color so often is because I do not really think my outward "coloring" says much about my personality. I always feel the same regardless of how my hair is. Maybe this is because I came into this world as a blonde, blue-eyed girl, retained the blonde hair for 3 years and the blue eyes for almost 7 years before nature made me into a hazel eyed brunette. Maybe nature wants me to be a chameleon? Hehe

[ericthegreat]

Ok so I have an appointment at the salon today. Im having highlights again. Last time was january 5th and I told myself I would go at least 3-4 months before next time. If I ever would do them again... But I have a really important job interview on tuesday and I just dont feel comfortable with my 1.7 in. dark roots... :rolleyes: So Im gonna get them done. Again.

Elina, if you feel truly happier getting highlights, then by all means go out and get them done. The most important thing is that you yourself are happy with whatever decision you decide to make. I do agree that you look very beautiful with blond hair, it suits you quite nicely. :flower:

[crystal_k]

i know how you feel , i had an allover highlift tint bleach obsession. its only about 7 mnths ive stopped bleaching i just love being blonde and the whiter the better but couldnt grow my hair past apl.
there is something about blonde hair i personally think i look younger with blonde hair. and im used to the lightness around my face . its going to be hard to give up the colour but i will settle on a medium to light natural blonde look noo bleach.
can you just do the top few layers in highlights and leave the rest

[minkstole]

I cut down on my highlighting by reducing the amount of hair that got highlighted each time and only ever having it done in the mohawk and faceframing areas. This way I still had the illusion of overall lighter hair, while slowly going darker. Maybe this is an option for you too?
Good luck with the interview;)

[Shermie Girl]

It's interesting how one can feel "not herself" in their natural colors...I'll never understand that :rolleyes:


Ouch!

I was a platinum blonde as a child but like many people, my hair darkened as I got older. As it darkened, I lightened it chemically to continue to sport the colour that feels natural and right to me.

I have been a brunette and a redhead. I am currently growing and trimming away damage so that I can once again be blonde. I don't feel like myself with brown or red hair. I enjoy them for a short period of time, then I start feeling the overwhelming need to be light haired, again. Blonde hair suits my complexion and my personality.

My "natural" colour just doesn't feel "natural" to or for me. And many others feel the same.

[BrightEyes]

Elina333, I just wanted to tell you that I am going through the exact same thing. I've been highlighting my hair for 8 or 9 years. My hair is naturally dark blonde, and while I don't necessarily think it's drab or ugly, I just simply like how my hair looks with the variation of light and dark throughout (I get a partial of hi/low lights). And I feel that highlights really brighten my face, whereas my natural color makes me look a little pale.

I only have about an inch of regrowth right now, but in another couple months I have an appointment to get the roots retouched. With all my new efforts to protect my hair and be gentle with it, it does seem like highlighting is counterproductive. It's a hard decision to make.

I'm considering having my natural color weaved throughout my hair when I go to the salon again, and grow my virgin hair out from then on. But I don't know what I'm going to do yet. I just love being blonde, darnit!!!

If you do decide to continue highlighting, I would recommend doing a heavy coconut oiling before your appointment (I do an overnight oiling). I explained to my stylist why my hair looked oily and she was cool with it. I felt like it did protect my hair from some of the damage and my hair was a lot less dry after.

Good luck and let us know what you decide.:flowers:

[mellie89]

I also know the feeling. I was white blond as a little girl and have darkened over the years to the point where I am not sure if it's dirty blond or light brown.

If you want to highlight, then by all means go for it. It's less damaging than bleaching everything, especially if you just touch up your roots every couple months. It's a personal choice.

I think if you take good care of your hair otherwise, it will still be healthier-looking than most people's. Also, if your goal is still waist, that is not ridiculously long, so I think you're allowed a little wiggle room in your routine. I "only" want to get to waist as well, which is why I don't mind layers, frequent trims, cones, and blow drying occasionally, which might seem like hair sins to someone who wants to reach classic or beyond.

[elina333]

Thanks for all the support! I went to the salon today and I am now a shiney happy blonde again! :D This is truly the only color I am comfortable with and highlighting is the ONLY bad thing I do to my hair... So I went for it!

Im really happy with it now although she lightened it quite a bit, but I had a layer of coconut oil in it so I hope that helped. The ends feel slightly dry but I think a few nights of deep oilings will do the trick. I didnt even let her blowdry it! :D I walked out of the salon with soaking wet hair :D Also, I combed it myself with a wide tooth comb... So I think I minimized the damage. Coconut oil, no blowfry and no crazy-ripping-the-brush-through-poor-customers-hair-when-wet-brushing ;)

[MonikaHa]

Congrats on your highlights, I am sure they are great!

Last year I thought I would go back to my natural color, so I colored it closest to what matched my roots, and oh boy.... everyone told me I looked OLD and SICKLY, and my bf hated it.
Three months later I was a blondie again.

[chargersfan]

Another was-light-blonde-as-a-kid-and-dark-blonde-now raising her hand! I don't dye mine, but I think it sad how I have the hair color nobody wants. Almost everybody I know with dark blonde hair dyes it another color (usually highlights). It seems to be the "blech" color. But, I keep mine b/c I hate salons and roots and anything that takes my time. I don't blame anybody for dying their hair or getting some highlights put in. If I could have the light blonde color back that I had as a teen, I would!

[BrightEyes]

Yay! I'm glad it worked out for you!:cheese: There's just something about being a blondie, isn't there?


I've also been leaving the salon with wet hair. I get a couple strange looks, but oh well. My hair's better for it.

[Henrietta]

My hair used to be almost black when I was a child. Some time ago it became lighter. I used to call that colour "grey water after washing up after a big party". And my friend said: "You are mentaly ill. I call that colour walnut or nut-brown or auburn. I kill you if you call your hair grey water etc. one more time" So find NICE NAMES for your hair color. It's just a small stupid thing but helps a lot. Nice names.

So if health hair is important for you, get used to your colour. Because tha fact that you cannot imagine yourself in any color but blond is just a matter of a habit. It is IMPOSSIBLE that someone's colors, like eyebrows, eyes or hair, don't fit to the whole person- charter and appearance. Certainly you look fabulous in your natural hair, better than in ANY other.

[Demetrue]

I totally understand wanting to maintain the hair color you were born with :>) I think with your base color, you should be able to get blond highlights just by using a level 9 blonde with 20 vol. developer rather than full-on bleach highlights.

[natorade]

I just had my hair highlighted a week ago. I try and wait at least 10 weeks between, and by time I get to the salon, I have some wicked dark roots going. I was blonde as a child and as I get older my hair is getting darker. I do think that I am going to try and get less hair highlighted every 10 weeks so I can spare some damage by doing this, I am sure my hair will start getting darker. Last week, when I went to the salon, I put coconut oil in my hair the night before and it did seem to make my softer after the highlights, even my stylist made mention of it.

[Katze]

Yes but the problem is I dont feel like "myself" in any other color than blonde... I've been blonde all my life. So I guess I just have to deal with the fact that Im gonna be damaging it... :shudder: :lala: :meditate:

This is fine. You may decide, at a certain point, that you 1) want longer (or thicker, or healthier) hair and thus have to scrap the bleach, or 2) that you actually do want to embrace your natural color and start a revolution. :D

Both were true for me but only after I was in my 30s...


I was blonde as a little girl and when I reached my teens I started to get darker, and I also started with the bleach. So I have ALWAYS been blonde, which is why I dont feel like myself in any other color :hmm: Especially not my rat-brownish-dirty-blonde hue... :shudder:

Yep, another one here. My used-to-be-blonde cousins were using Sun-In, so I did too. I bleached my hair from age 13 to age 32. Scary when I think about it.

I think our society teaches us to hate our color. Especially here in Northern Europe where many, many women have this color (the men seem to leave it natural, interestingly...) but they all feel they have to have their childhood blonde back.

There is a great book called 'Blonde Like Me' where she discusses exactly what goes on in her head with the 'I deserve to be blonde.'


Another was-light-blonde-as-a-kid-and-dark-blonde-now raising her hand! I don't dye mine, but I think it sad how I have the hair color nobody wants. Almost everybody I know with dark blonde hair dyes it another color (usually highlights). It seems to be the "blech" color. But, I keep mine b/c I hate salons and roots and anything that takes my time. I don't blame anybody for dying their hair or getting some highlights put in. If I could have the light blonde color back that I had as a teen, I would!

Yes, for some reason our color is universally despised. I would like to know where this comes from (the abovementioned book has some nice ideas) and am personally on a campaign to stop this. Recently another new mama I know who started bleaching again when her baby was born asked me if my hair color is natural, 'really?' and was impressed. 'Oh, it is such a rare color.' (Yes, I thought, because everyone else bleaches it!)

Now that I am a mom I love the fact that DH and I have this 'hair colored' hair and our baby is blonde, whereas everywhere we see moms who have bleached their hair to match their kid's hair, which I find hilarious for some reason. DH is another one but for some reason he counts as (dark) blonde and I do not.

I have however come to appreciate how much nicer my hair color looks against my skin and eye color, and how much more natural. I hate salons and roots too, and ESPECIALLY spending MONEY for it all, and I hated the *feeling* my hair always had at the ends. It is fine so it always felt so dried out no matter what I did.

To the OP, it is about making YOURSELF happy. For me, for years, I felt happy blonde. I have blonde eyebrows and it felt right, natural, feminine, alluring, etc etc etc. YOU have to feel good about yourself and happy in your body. You are still young and how this manifests can change, but for now it is about being true to your own feelings. :)

[crystal_k]

hi elina 33 can i ask you how you get your highlights do you do a full head of bleach highlights or something else.
i only ask as i think your colour looks really pretty x

[minkstole]

Katze, the reason why so many people abandon this particular colour in northern Europe, is that it is so very common here. Blonde too. Most people I know dye their hair darker, only every now and again is there a trend towards going lighter.
I too have puma coloured hair ;) and I´m iching to get something else, but I´ll wait a good 3 months before doing so.

[MonikaHa]

I am Eastern European, and it really has nothing to do with me trying to match my kid's haircolor. (not to mention, his hair is jet black).
It is about how the lighter color hair softens my features. It is hard to explain, my natural color is really nice and unique, I just don't like the way it makes me look.

[justgreen]

I started at BSL with bleached highlights and I'm now hip length, still with bleached highlights, and sometimes lowlights. I don't get the big deal. If you take care of your hair and have a good colorist, you can grow your hair longer and still be blonde. Every time I go to the salon, any new girl that happens to be working always is amazed at how healthy my hair is. Sometimes they actually fight over who gets to rinse the bleach out just so they can touch my hair. Some have never seen hair as long as mine with highlights. I owe it all to LHC. :flowers:

[xoxophelia]

I was blonde as a little girl and when I reached my teens I started to get darker, and I also started with the bleach. So I have ALWAYS been blonde, which is why I dont feel like myself in any other color :hmm: Especially not my rat-brownish-dirty-blonde hue... :shudder:

Sorry if this is too late, but you could use a semipermanent color that is a dark blonde to help you transition to at least a less damaging blonde. The less bleach your hair has to endure the better. So if you lift your natural color's base 1-2 shades and then get some bright highlights, your hair will be in better condition than as a platinum blonde. You may also have more shine in comparison.

I am thinking about at some point lightening the colored section of my hair and get some highlights to both be lighter again and blend in the roots/color.. Hmmm...

[prosperina]

I'd like to clarify something in this discussion. It's not always about recapturing the hair you had as a child. Plenty of people, even some with rather dark brown hair right now, were blond as a child. I was blond, strawberry golden blond until I was 21 years old. Often times blond and red hair just fade. It's the first to fade. A lot of brunettes just don't get this.

My sister is 35 and her hair is still mostly red, but it has faded a lot into a sandy, vaguely blond kind of grey red. There is NOTHING wrong with her enhancing her color. She probably looks ten years younger than she really is given the fact she is young acting and has no lines on her face. She's just not ready for drab looking greyish red. It washes out her complexion and makes her facial features a bit harsher.

I think lots of people love to hate on what they consider "unnatural". After I hennaed (in a misguided attempt to match blonder hair with darker blond reddish roots) it looked gorgeous but so many people delighted in saying snidely that it was fake. What the heck? What are those highlights that they were sporting? Fake. I realize no one on this thread was actually saying this, but I don't always believe that natural is superior.

[elina333]

hi elina 33 can i ask you how you get your highlights do you do a full head of bleach highlights or something else.
i only ask as i think your colour looks really pretty x

Well thanks! :D Yes I do a full head of bleach highlights. But they use the most gentle one :) Oh, and I only do my roots... About every ten weeks or so.

[longblond]

Ok...I'm another "use to be really blonde as a kid and when it started going darker I started on the bleach". I've made several posts about this. It has got to be the number one so far unresoved problem in hair. How to stay blonde naturally. I used the honey lightening for awhile successfully, but I had to do it weekly to get it the blonde I wanted and from the the maintaince was rough...it was a lot of work. I still like it and want to do it. I have tired the Organic Color System recently which is peroxide free and ammonia free...but they use some other kind of chem. Goldwell has a non peroxide and no ammonia color too. Again...They must use other chems and I'm not sure they are any better then the old chems. I think all the time about going natural and the grow out seems horrible. I think about changing my color...but to what? I look sick if I go too dark and red is just horrific. This is the horrible blonde delima that is really a struggle. So far, what I have found is to get balayage hair light lights...the re growth demacation line will not longer exsist. Have the hairstylist use a no peroxide, no ammonia blonde color for the highights and skip the bleach or use a no peroxide, no ammonia type of bleach. With balayage the highlights are more natural and there are not so many and so your natural color comes thru a bit. From there you can grow it out natural or you can just wait a lot longer before you have to go back to salon and have it re-done, which is healther. Thats what I'm doing now and my hair is a darker blonde then I like but more of my own real hair color is showing and I feel better about it. I am always looking for better and more natural blonde solutions. I know exactly what it means that you don't feel right in any other color...I don't either...but for me, I really don't look right with any other color.