View Full Version : Never could grow long hair
jivete
May 1st, 2008, 09:28 PM
So I'm hoping there are a few of you out there like me who have never been able to grow long hair. For me, it's been barely BSL maybe once, and that was only because of pregnancy. My hair never seems to get much past the point it is now even though I have been actively growing it since, well for at least 15 years. It's pretty sad really.
This is likely because of care, but honestly, for most of my life I haven't really done anything to it. Sure I was a daily S&C-er, but no heat to speak of, no bleach, have only dyed darker and only recently...But nothing ultra harsh, which always annoyed me when friends would bleach, curl, dry, etc and still have way longer hair then me. At a certain point (usually at about APL) my hair would start self-trimming with little bits of broken hair everywhere. I'd get sick of it (an it'd look like crud), go to get a little trimmed off (ha!) and then have to start 2 inches shorter.
Well I finally have hope. Found no poo (really just ditched SLS & consequently, cones) this site and have come to accept that my hair just can't handle much, if any abuse if I want any sort of healthy length.
So is anyone else out there like me? Do you now feel like you finally have the tools to grow the hair you want? Or, better yet, was like me and now has great, long hair? I'd love to hear stories.
HaiirPEACE
May 1st, 2008, 10:05 PM
i have the same problem. my hair is the same length since i joined the forum
salamander
May 1st, 2008, 10:35 PM
My hair used to do that self trimming thing, not as short as yours, but yours sounds finer. I've pretty much fixed it by getting my hair properly moisturized, and detangling more gently. I cannot emphasize the second point enough. I used to rip through my ends with a ball tipped brush, just whack whack whack, no real detangling, just ripping. A year ago I switched to gently detangling with a wide toothed horn comb, and my hair is now as long as it has ever been.
So, moisturize the living daylights out of your ends, and get a comb and be very, very nice. I'm moving towards finger combing, at least for my ends. A horn comb is an excellent tool, though!
Morag
May 1st, 2008, 10:59 PM
My hair is currently at the length - about collarbone - that it always reaches right before I give up and whack it all off. This time, it's also heavily layered.
The reason I usually give up at this point is that my hair is very fine, and it just gets so dry that it begins to break from its own weight at this length. However, on LHC I have found several possible options for combating dryness without weighing my hair down, and I'm currently experimenting with them with pleasant results. You can't prove anything by me yet, but I do feel I have softer, healthier hair than I had when I began in March, and that makes me less inclined to go for the scissors. Definitely a step in the right direction.
I measured once at the outset and will measure again in about six months. I will trim (as little as possible) every three months. I just did a trim and the evened ends look infinitely better than what I had before. I don't imagine my hair will grow fast. I am just concentrating right now on the fact that my hair feels better to me and is looking pretty good. I would love to have it longer, but to some degree I'm looking on what I'm doing as learning how to have the healthiest hair possible. Then if the healthier hair is able to grow longer, I can be happily surprised.
Addition: I completely agree with Salamander about using a horn comb (wide toothed), and finger combing. It was very startling to me to realize how much of my hair I was actually yanking out with ball-tipped brushes, and standard plastic combs seem to be extremely rough on it, too.
aisling
May 2nd, 2008, 12:15 AM
I was never able to grow longer than just below shoulder blade, a little above BSL. Then my ends felt so dry and damaged that I trimmed them and never got any further. With some good ideas from LHC, like using coconut oil as leave in, which my hair just loves, I've been able to grow further. My hair is now almost tailbone length. Also, what conditioners I use make a huge difference. And I say conditioners, as I usually use two every time after washing, one moisturising, one that gives more slip.
HaiirPeace, you've been a member here for only a few days more than a month. Not getting any growth in such time isn't unheard of and, as a new measurer, it's easy to get incorrect measurements.
Anje
May 2nd, 2008, 05:21 PM
Hello, welcome, read and learn. Most of the key to growing hair longer is being kind to it when you're brushing/combing, limiting heat styling, and make sure hair is sufficiently moisturized. Not getting frustrated and cutting it off helps, too, so we have what's called the "two week rule." It's basically that if you have an urge to cut or do anything drastic to your hair, you wait two weeks, and if you don't have any second thoughts at all during that period, only then do you go ahead.
Unfortunately, darker dyes are often still damaging. Most permanent hair dyes contain ammonia and/or peroxide, which ensures that everyone gets results consistent with the packaging. It also causes damage. There are "deposit-only" dyes out there. You may want to look into those, or consider using some combination of cassia, henna, and indigo, which strengthen and thicken hair while coloring it. (Henna in particular is incredibly permanent, though, so be sure you want to take the plunge. Oh, and ignore the hairstylists who say it's bad for hair. It's only bad if you use bad stuff.)
Hang in there, HairPeace. Growth can sometimes stall for months at a time, and you've not been here long yet. Stalling near BSL or waist is extremely common. The trick is to wait it out, be patient, and continue to be kind to your hair. It's very rare that it won't start growing again at that length.
spidermom
May 2nd, 2008, 05:52 PM
When I began my long-hair growing journey, my hair stalled at only a little longer than shoulder length, about the same length as yours, jivete. I found a hair stylist who had classic-length hair. She told me that if I would come in every 6-8 weeks and have a teeny-tiny trim, my hair would grow again. She was right! I went from growing 0 inches per year to about 5 inches per year. Since then I have learned how to take better care of my hair, and I only get it trimmed every 3 months.
Some types of hair NEED to be trimmed. It might not make any sense to some, but this is the truth of it: in my case, trimming truly does help my hair to grow. You can see how well it has worked for me in my signature picture.
asantegold
May 2nd, 2008, 06:01 PM
What an inspirational thread. Up until a few months ago, I've never been able to grow hair past my armpits. It would always break off because I didn't take proper care of it and abused it with chemicals and heat. Right now, I'm touching bra-strap. So far, stretching my hair relaxers and using minimal heat has really helped me.
Right now, I hoping/planning to completely stop using the relaxers and figure out what will help me avoid mechanical breakage, since that's a potential problem area with my natural hair. I've gone farther then I've ever gone before, but I feel like there is still more I need to learn. The tips/stories this in thread are great.
suicides_eve
May 2nd, 2008, 06:04 PM
HaiirPeace, you've been a member here for only a few days more than a month. Not getting any growth in such time isn't unheard of and, as a new measurer, it's easy to get incorrect measurements.
took most of the word right outta my mouth, it usally take 3 months to see any real difference in growth unless you constantly measure you hair and chart it all out.
Babyfine
May 2nd, 2008, 08:22 PM
I see your hair type is very similar to mine.
I could never get my hair to grow past my shoulders, either.
This was even in high school when my hair was completly virgin.
Only during my two pregnancies did my hair grow with ease.
I did get my hair which was also highlighted to finally grow past BSL after I found the long hair boards by mainly wearing it up and very gentle care.
And I totally agree with Spidermom about the trims, I too have that type of hair that needs to be trimmed every 3 months at least, even if it's just 1/8 of an inch.
I use a satin pillowcase and try to avoid any kind of friction on my hair.
rubyredslippers
May 2nd, 2008, 11:46 PM
Before now, I've never had longer-than BSL hair (without damage) because the ends would get really dry and start auto-trimming, but then I didn't know anything about oils/moisturizing beyond ALS shampoo and cones conditioner (I still use my cones), and I washed every second day. So we shall see how things grow from here.:shrug:
Melisande
May 3rd, 2008, 03:29 AM
I"m embarrassed to repeat myself... but here it is.
I recommend Jessie's essential oil mixture (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=2001). I use it regularly and love it. It makes my scalp healthy, wealthy and wise... and very, very happy. And a happy scalp is what you need if you want to grow your hair.
Moisturize (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=1064)your lengths and ends, protect them with plaits or updos, reduce friction at night with silk or satin coverings over your pillow or a sleep cap. Dilute your shampoo, be gentle to your hair.
It will take a while until you see results. Don't forget, the hair you see now has not received optimal treatment and may be prone to breakage. This is what I keep telling myself, too.
But I do hope you will see less breakage and will break the length barrier.
Shanarana
May 3rd, 2008, 06:39 AM
I never thought I could grow my hair long either. I went through a bad bout of depression for about three months and noticed that it started to grow and been growing ever since.
Mangachan
May 3rd, 2008, 07:39 AM
There was a point when my hair would stay at arm pit length. That didn't change until I reduced heat and started moisturizing my ends like it's no tommorrow.
girlcat36
May 3rd, 2008, 08:10 AM
I cut my past-BSL hair to a chin length bob in 1991. My hair would not grow past BSL after that. I was very gentle to my hair--no coloring, no brushing, no blow-drying, no gels or hairsrays. I could not understand what was going on. 17 years and not gaining length!!
I finally figured out that my hair WAS growing, but it was breaking off! I was only using 'good' products---Pantene, etc.
The culprit-----hair shampoos and conditioners with cones in them!
The cones(which the 'good' hair products contain mass quantities of) were terrible for my hair, making it dry and brittle. This was a very exciting discovery for me, and when I quit the cones my hair became more manageable. Unfortunately, after my 'cone' discovery I was diagnosed with cancer and the treatment wreaked havoc on my hair.
I have to say, though, even though I lost half my hair, since joining LHC I have been gaining some decent length.
There is hope!
jesamyn
May 3rd, 2008, 08:40 AM
My hair was stuck between APL and BSL until I found this place the first time around. I knocked off the chemical colors around that time too and started using henna instead. My hair actually got close to waist length before I chopped it off because I didn't like how it looked. (Straight and blunt doesn't work for me.)
Now I'm going round two. You'll get there. :) Moisturize it until it can't take anymore and keep the breakage trimmed. It really helps!
jivete
July 9th, 2008, 01:35 PM
I hate to bump up this thread (I actually lost it and stumbled across it this afternoon), but I wanted to see how everyone was doing. I'm past APL now but I'm definitely due for a trim. I did a tiny, tiny micro-trim at the end of June but I'm planning for 1/4" to 1/2" Aug 1st after I measure, only on the longest layer though. It's been 3 months since my real trim.
Right now I'm alternating my washes between CO, WO and a mix of Amla & Shikakai. I started doing the Monistat the night before washes and I wash every other day. I've only done the MN 4 times now, so nothing to note yet.
I haven't done any box dye or heat since about February and really, my hair is longer than it's been in years. I feel like it's stalling right now, but I think it's hit more of a mental wall than anything. I've dyed with henndigo and done a Cassia treatment and a couple of protein treatments with varied success.
Anyone have any progress/updates?
Happy growing.
girlcat36
July 9th, 2008, 02:51 PM
Slowly creeping towards BSL.......
Got lots of new baby hairs, though!
ailin
July 9th, 2008, 03:39 PM
The longest my hair has ever been was somewhere between BSL and waist, around six years ago. However, it was incredibly damaged from years of heat styling, neglect and dyes, and just wouldn't grow any further. Not to mention it looked horrible; dry, frizzy and full of splits.
Now I've ditched the blow drier and chemical dyes, and discovered the wonders of BAQ henna and oiling (not to mention learning to embrace my waves instead of fighting them) I'm hoping to finally reach waist this time around... perhaps even longer.
thankyousir74
July 9th, 2008, 04:41 PM
Wow this is indeed a very inspirational thread. Some where between chin and shoulder length i hit a bit of a mental wall and I kept wanting to chop off all my layers, (leaving it around ear length).
But I resisted and my layers persist.
But I agree with ailin, a bit of oiling and embracing your hair type is the key to good growing
:twocents:
Cichelle
July 9th, 2008, 05:08 PM
For years I was stuck at barely bsl. I thought it just didn't grow longer than that. Of course, I was chemically straightening it from root to tip four times a year and detangling it like I was mad at the world. Should I mention the daily blow drying I did on DRY hair for a while there?
I finally stopped relaxing my hair, cut off the straightened ends, gave up heat, bought a seamless comb and started treating my hair more gently. I also wore my hair up nearly every day.
It's currently the longest it has ever been and hopefully still growing.
HHG!
dontcallmejessi
July 9th, 2008, 05:29 PM
Yes, my hair was exactly like yours. Never ever ever ever grew past just below the shoulders in my whole life, even though I never cut it, never colored, never heat styled, never blow dried, never bleached. Add to that that I used to brutally rub my hair between two ends of the towel to dry it!!!:bigeyes: I had no idea I was stripping the cuticles off my hair and ripping it out, making it brittle and who knows just how much damage that did :shocked: Anyway after finally stopping the brutal towel drying and taking very gentle good care of my hair, oiling the ends after every wash, did away with SLS, and a little boost from monistat I am now pleased to announce I can call myself barely touching waist now :cheese: if I stretch down the curls. I won't officially call it waist until it touches waist without stretching, but I am so close! Now my ends are still damaged of course. I have not been at this long enough to grow out all the damage yet, but I will slowly. I can see that my new growth is so much thicker and healthier and I can't wait until it is grown all the way to the ends. I can see that my roots all the way to about 8 inches or so down is way thick compared to the ends. I can see full thick hair in my future :D
I plan to let it grow to waist and then continuously trimming to maintain waist until all the damaged ends are gone. then grow, grow, grow!:eyebrows:
jivete
July 9th, 2008, 10:50 PM
I'm so glad everyone's making progress, even if it is slowly. ;) The layers are such a pain. I really liked my layers with the shorter hair cuts and the cones, because they gave me some volume. Now? They just make the longest length look wispy and even if it's healthy for the most part, the see-through business just drives me nuts! I just want to cut it back to where it's thick (ha! for me) and blunt.
Refraining. Small trims. Small trims.
I really just need to join the hair up challenge so I'd quit messing with it.
Sofoulee
July 9th, 2008, 10:53 PM
My hair has been at the same length all of my life.
It's so frustrating.
Elenna
July 9th, 2008, 11:21 PM
Boy, am I glad to see this topic. I used to over dye my hair, blow dry it to smithereens, curl the ends with a curling iron to a frizzle, and use harsh products with silcon for a finale. No wonder why it was so dry, stringy and frizzy.
After a year of easy treatment and mild products with oils, voilą it's growing. Damp bunning it seems to be the magic key to keeping it growing. This helps even damaged hair.
jivete
July 10th, 2008, 07:21 AM
Sofoulee I completely understand. I can look at pictures from 10 years ago and it's the same length, sometimes a little shorter, but never longer.
The length it is now is definitely my wall and I'm afraid I'll never push past it. If I cut off 3 inches today, I know it'd grow back but then I'm afraid it'd get stuck here again. I have this fear that my terminal length is just below APL.
It's completely frustrating.
Radulfr
July 10th, 2008, 07:27 AM
So I'm hoping there are a few of you out there like me who have never been able to grow long hair... My hair never seems to get much past the point it is now even though I have been actively growing it since, well for at least 15 years. It's pretty sad really.
So is anyone else out there like me? Do you now feel like you finally have the tools to grow the hair you want?
I have been actively growing for eight years. It hasn't grown beyond mid-back/BSL when wet, inches above that when dry. I can sympathize with you well. Maybe if I was more consistent with the conditioner, it woud go longer.
sexyjacksparrow
July 10th, 2008, 08:10 AM
Mine doesn't really grow either. The longest it's been is APL (pulled straight) and that was in pretty rough condition. Longest and looking ok - shoulder length. That was with being supernice to it, not straghtening it, wearing it up all the time. Didn't seem to help any and I don't enjoy my hair up even though it protects it more.
so now I'm just enjoying my hair and if it grows, it's a bonus.
Kerry xx
curly girl fla
July 10th, 2008, 08:32 AM
..snip...
so now I'm just enjoying my hair and if it grows, it's a bonus.
Kerry xx
Well said. I truly need to adopt your healthy attitude! My hair grows so very slowly. The past few years I was working on embracing the curl, but now that it is fairly healthy and curlier, it's so hard to see growth through the shrinkage. Plus, I think my hair pops out of my head already split, so if I trim to maintain health for the length, I'm constantly removing some length. I recently started taking MSM and extra Biotin, so hopefully that may give my follicles some motivation...
amaiaisabella
July 10th, 2008, 08:58 AM
I have kept my hair pretty much the same length (plus or minus a few inches) for the past 6 years. In high school, I had BSL-length hair, and it was pretty damaged from heat styling, though I didn't use color back then. After high school, I chopped most of it off, so it would touch the tops of my shoulders, and there it remained, through my work in a hair salon (dying your hair crazy colors is a good advertisement for the salon, not so much good for your hair :))
I've only been here 3 months, but I have already seen a BIG change in my hair. It has grown a little over an inch, which is a big thing to someone who used to grow about an inch a year. The overall texture and appearance has drastically changed- I've gotten tons of comments about how healthy it looks.
I'm not a patient person, but if I can wait the approximate year it's going to take me to get back to BSL, so can you. We all grow together :)
bex487
July 10th, 2008, 01:48 PM
My hair CAN grow longer, I just always had the short-cut bug. Grow it to my shoulders, try a new short cut. While I love short hair, I've had it all my life and I'm ready for a change. So far my hair is about 1.5 inches away from APL, and it's been a fun (if impatient) process.
squiggyflop
July 10th, 2008, 02:53 PM
i tortured my hair with chemicals and poor care so it never got longer than bsl and i always ended up bobbing it in the summer.. until now that is.. i hit waist in march and ended up trimming it back to bsl (alot of my hair is still very damaged by bleach so ive got to do trims to slowly get rid of it) im almost back to waist.. s&d's were very helpful when i thought my hair was breaking off faster than it could grow.. i also detangle my hair gently now.. i used to tear at it in an attempt to get it decent looking in less than 10 seconds (i always wake up late and have to rush)
right before i joined i was stuck at shoulder.. i probably would still be stuck there without henna and the advice on this site.. since finding this site my hair has grown really fast.. at least thats what some of the people here have told me.. here is a page with some pictures of the progress ive made.. (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=8040) my hair i realize now needs trims ive trimmed 4 inches since joining and my hair is happier because of it..
goldenwaves
July 12th, 2008, 05:07 AM
Aww, that sucks. I hope it grows longer for you :)
30isthenewblack
July 16th, 2008, 03:38 AM
It's so inspiring hearing everyone's stories. I only used to trim my hair and it actually did grow but I have realised that my two obstacles to growth were a) that my hair was breaking and b) that hairdressers were sabatoging my growth and cutting off any progress I had made. I wrote down all my goals including personal goals and one of them was to grow my hair so I joined this forum in May 2008 and took upon board a lot of the advice. I was in denial at how bad my hair actually looked. A lot of it is trial and error. I have found that my hair doesn't like any oils & I've tried shea butter, coconut oil and jojoba. It leaves my hair limp and looking like plastic. My hair also likes shampoo as well and it makes my hair have more volume. I've jumped on the monistat bandwagon and I've seen a lot of growth particularly in my do it yourself layers that was due to breakage. I've also bought a satin pillow as well and tried to wear my hair back more often. My hair has grown 1.5" since I have joined and it's winter here in Australia. I'm thrilled at the progress I've made so far and I'm hoping to reach 29" by the end of the year with my hair looking healthy, thick and strong. It's great being on a supportive forum and having people sharing the same goal to have long, glorious hair!
MissBiss
July 16th, 2008, 12:09 PM
This is a very inspirational thread.
My hair never grew longer than APL all my life due to damage from using too much heat. It was *almost* waist length until last Saturday when I got a trim, but now I know it can be done.
HHG to everyone!
Euphony
July 16th, 2008, 12:34 PM
Before LHC my hair would quit growing (really it broke) at bsl. I used to run the brush through my hair from top to bottom with the only goal being getting the tangles out as fast as possible. I never paid attention to ingredients my hair did and did not like, bought what shampoo and conditioner were on sale and as a result had a dry, breaking, fluffy, frizzy, poof ball on top of my head.
Now I comb with a seamless comb from top to bottom, pay close attention to ingredients, use oil, never blow dry, baby my hair. My hair is now very soft all the way to the tips and the tips are nearly tail bone!
girlcat36
July 17th, 2008, 06:37 PM
It's so inspiring hearing everyone's stories. I never used to trim my hair and it actually did grow but I have realised that my two obstacles to growth were a) that my hair was breaking and b) that hairdressers were sabatoging my growth and cutting off any progress I had made. I wrote down all my goals including personal goals and one of them was to grow my hair so I joined this forum in May 2008 and took upon board a lot of the advice. I was in denial at how bad my hair actually looked. A lot of it is trial and error. I have found that my hair doesn't like any oils & I've tried shea butter, coconut oil and jojoba. It leaves my hair limp and looking like plastic. My hair also likes shampoo as well and it makes my hair have more volume. I've jumped on the monistat bandwagon and I've seen a lot of growth particularly in my do it yourself layers that was due to breakage. I've also bought a satin pillow as well and tried to wear my hair back more often. My hair has grown 1.5" since I have joined and it's winter here in Australia. I'm thrilled at the progress I've made so far and I'm hoping to reach 29" by the end of the year with my hair looking healthy, thick and strong. It's great being on a supportive forum and having people sharing the same goal to have long, glorious hair!
Sounds like we have the same problems, 30!
Are you using a seamless comb? I will never go back to seamed combs; I think this has also helped with the breakage.
Speedbump
July 18th, 2008, 01:12 AM
Mine was more or less the same length for about 10 years. Purely because I was treating it badly and let it rub between my back and the back of my chair all day at work. I actually thought the sides grew faster than the back! :wacko: :lol:
My hair really started to get longer after the worst of the damage was cut out. Now most of my hair is LHC hair and it's thicker and in such better shape. I never could have grown it to my current length, EVER, doing what I used to do with it. LHC really works, so take heart, ladies! :cheese:
Cinnia
July 18th, 2008, 04:14 AM
I'm at BSL now and that's where I always seems to cut it off.
I haven't had an urge for longer hair than thait either, but after finding LHC I've been dying to se how long it can get!
So, just a couple of months ago, at my current length, I would've cut it back to shoulder, maybe abit shorter, I used to have a scissorhappy hairdresser aswell ;)...
But I've been lurking around here sence january, and a combination of learning gentle haircair & swiching washing routine to CO, and the fact that I've been going to a new salong with a very understanding and supportive hairdresser, has lead up to only two microtrims to even out the hemnline.
I don't see a reason to cut more than that, so....guess I'm on my way to waist!
I've never seen my hair longer than this so I don't know if I have the genes for it :pray:, but it sure is exiting.
Very inspiring to read all of your stories :cheese:
30isthenewblack
July 18th, 2008, 04:40 AM
Sounds like we have the same problems, 30!
Are you using a seamless comb? I will never go back to seamed combs; I think this has also helped with the breakage.
I used to comb my hair in the shower using a wide tooth comb & I think this accounted for a lot of the breakage. I actually don't know what a seamless comb is? I only finger comb my hair now and that's only to separate the curls when I put product in my hair. I used to lose about 50 hairs a day when I combed it in the shower and now I lose about ten hairs a day. I read a lot of your posts and it's like I could have written the post myself :) Our hair is about the same length as well and bounces up at the same rate. It's frustrating but we will get there. I wore my hair in a side braid today and everyone was surprised at how long it actually is. If we can get past bsl, I know we will hit waist in no time at all :)
Jasmine19
July 28th, 2008, 11:24 PM
I have thin hair and am loosing it at the crown area!!! I also have the same length problem, it never grows beyond shoulder!!! and yes one sitting of an hot treatment 6 years ago also killed and effected my roots!!!!
I am new to LHC, and after reading your success stories I feel good!!!:) lets see what happens:rolleyes:
Jasmine19
July 28th, 2008, 11:25 PM
Also in my entire life I have never taken care of my hair!!! Never eaten healthy stuff on a regular basis!!!
Najade
July 29th, 2008, 03:55 AM
Wow, this is the right thread for me and I am happy that I found it!
My hair is at the same length for years now...And like so many here, I found out that my hair didnt yust stopped growing, but that it yust broke off. I remember my hairdresser told me my hair would not be longer than shoulder length, but the longest layers are at BSL! And i remember pictures with all of my hair being at BSL. After reading here and on other hairboards, I found out this really suits hairdressers. They cut the growth away. And, whenn you are having curls like I...a one or two centimeter cut ( which was always more at the hairdresser), is wayyy more for a curly person!
Now I stopped blowdrying and since I cut somethimes one cm off, I can say my hair really looks better. Still its damaged, it had years of blow drying every day, combing it without being gentle, taking a lot of shampoo and no conditioner etc.
Now I can see, that with the help of oils and the trimming, my hair really looks healthier and that it grows back faster after a trimming than it did before. So I think I am on the right way:)
sipnsun
July 30th, 2008, 09:42 AM
Count me in this club, my hair has never grown past BSL, but I've never tried growing it without bleach in it. So now we will see.......
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