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xovictoryxo
February 28th, 2010, 05:09 PM
Hey everyone! I love this site it is so informative.
My baby is 4 months old now. and she is starting to grow some wild hair, (she is black greek italian...) its starting to get really curly and courser as the weeks go by. I am just going to prepare myself with knowledge now.

What kind of haircare and maintenance am I looking at?
What is a good shampoo, and moisturizer/ conditioner for ethnic hair?
what are some cute hair styles for really curly hair? i dont want to have just a pony tail that looks like a frizzy pom poms ;/ lol
My girlfriend told me her hair might be really brittle and heat is extremely damaging... so blow drying straight doesn't sound good. she says she brings her 5 year old daughter to the shop to get a perm (which in ethnic world it means straightened not curled like at my salon), doesn't this sound excessive for someone so young to get a chemical treatment??
i use mouse on my own hair for the curly look is this okay to use??
ah man I am nervous about her future hair
please forgive me for sounding so stupid ;(i lack on my own hair and I am truly researching now to prepare myself.

Spring
February 28th, 2010, 05:40 PM
xovictoryxo,

your questions are very good questions :). In my opinion, I think a relaxer is harsh for babies/toddlers etc., and if it makes you feel any better my mom had 2 heads of hair to deal with. I would find a good moisturizer and oil to seal with. When my granddaughter visits, I use water, conditioner (Suave coconut), and olive oil to style her hair in twists, braids and cute ponytails

Tyrinaniel
February 28th, 2010, 07:06 PM
NaturalVeil on youtube has been going on a "natural" journey because relaxers ruined her hair. Maybe you can ask her what she's doing.

Just curious-why do you say ethnic kids? Mixed races I can understand, being of mixed myself. Ethnicity describes one race, not several. If you're describing Black hair, NaturalVeil is who you need. She specifically said she looked up "How to grow Black hair long" when she was researching natural methods for growing her hair. She's British and talks so cute, so I think you'd enjoy her videos.

xovictoryxo
February 28th, 2010, 07:14 PM
thanks I'm going to check her out.
I used the wrong terminology I did mean mixed/black hair sorry for confusion!

Tyrinaniel
February 28th, 2010, 09:27 PM
It's okay. I never assume two people know the exact same thing! While I'm Asian/White, I have Italian, Chinese, and Spanish in my blood. :) Mixed people rock! :cheese:

GoddesJourney
February 28th, 2010, 11:17 PM
I was watching my sister in law and her baby because the little girl got the curly hair. My husband has it too, so stands to reason I will have to learn about this for my own children. Anyway, she was putting some kind of hair cream in to the baby's hair to keep the curls together and to moisturise. She made some really cute styles on her but I can't remember most of them. I saw a lady on YouTube that had a channel of what she was doing for her kid's hair. I guess the easy thing would be to make little cornrows. My friend in elementary school had at least waist length cornrowed, braided hair because she had really kinky hair and they looked beautiful on her. She said her mom did them on her every week or two.

Tabitha
March 1st, 2010, 03:33 AM
You might want to try Darl_in1's Cocaloe Creme (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=6713&highlight=cocaloe) which she made up for her mixed-race daughters and found very effective.


Cocaloe Leave-in creme

Equal parts of Coconut oil and Aloe vera gel
A good helping of Avocado oil (to suit your preference)

I warm the coconut oil and whip up with the aloe vera gel, then add the avo oil and mix thoroughly. Whip regularly as the cocnut oil cools (I put it in the fridge and chill until it's of a buttery texture)

The aloe and avo oil keeps the coconut oil as a 'buttery' texture once it cools and my girls keep a big tub in the bathroom and use it every morning to slick and moisturise their hair. It also keeps frizzies at bay and gives great curl definition.

florenonite
March 1st, 2010, 05:08 AM
Aww, I think those fuzzy pom pom ponytails are so cute! :lol:

I would definitely recommend against the relaxer, because the chemicals are harsh not just on the hair but also on the scalp. You're better off adding moisture rather than removing it, IMO.

I've got straight, northern European hair, though, so I don't have any more advice ;)

lapushka
March 1st, 2010, 05:18 AM
Don't despair. There are ways. This might help. It's a mom & daughter both doing DDs hair.

"My daughter's natural hair regimen"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HQr50MlFyds&feature=related

Athena's Owl
March 1st, 2010, 05:24 AM
oh lord please do not perm that child's hair.

it's hard to say what all exactly you're going to be looking at but three aren't truly a lot of products out there that are going to be effective, and they're not the same for everyone. i hesitate to even give you generalizations but i can tell you this. most shampoos, even baby shampoos, are going to be too hard on your child's hair. I'm a grown woman and baby shampoo turns my hair to straw, and I'm mixed race curly haired in very similar ways to your girl.

but what's going to save your day? probably the same thing that saved my day: Suave naturals conditioner.

I've tried many different things, at different price points high and low and i ALWAYS come back to suave naturals conditioner. Vo5 has some that I've also had good experiences with. there's a lot of ingredientes that might cause chaos because your water is hard instead of soft or because you live in an area with very high humidity or an area of very low humidity and all theres are going to affect her hair and if you can take the time to learn them, perms won't even be in the question because her curls will be beautiful.

but your question is a very involved one, there is so much information that I can't just give you an easy answer.

xovictoryxo
March 1st, 2010, 10:34 AM
thanks everyone for your advice!!! i am writing this all down :)

Sweetness
March 1st, 2010, 11:04 AM
You should really leave it natural ! I'm sure it'll be unique and beautiful with some tender loving care :)

Gypsy
March 1st, 2010, 12:49 PM
Do. Not. Use. A. Relaxer.
Don't! It will not be good for her hair and scalp and it will start a ridiculous cycle of dependency on that junk- you know on black hair care boards, they call it "Creamy CRACK".
Also, don't fill her poor little head with thousands of deely boppers and barrettes. It looks awful.
You can do some nice braids once it gets long enough- don't braid tight and give her traction alopecia and yes, I have seen girls as young as 7-8 with an obvious loss of a hairline from their screaming tight braids.
You can use some nice gentle conditioners in her air to encourage the natural curl, again, you have to wait to see what the patter will actually be- it will not be what you see as a baby. My hair as a baby was shiny lose curls that changed a lot just in the first few years.
And there is no guarantee it will be loose curls just because she is mixed. I'm about as mixed as you can get and my hair ranges from extremely fine with no wave at all, to medium and wavy or loose curls to very very course and kinky (the strands are in a "z").
So, just do some conditioning, probably unrefined virgin coconut oil or maybe a itty bitty drop of Proclaim Natural 7 oil (botanical) for now since she's a baby and as her hair gets longer, make determinations on what the patterns and types of hair you are dealing with and go from there.

Ursula
March 1st, 2010, 01:03 PM
You may want to check out the website naturallycurly.com. They discuss these types of issues, and the commercial part of that site (CurlMart) has a variety of products designed for curly/kinky hair, including children's products. The book "Curly Girl" might also be a good resource.

Generally for children, a simple hair routine is best. The more complected the routine gets, the more time it takes, and the harder it is for a child to have to sit still and deal with the fussing.

A one-step CO wash may be a good idea. Apply conditioner heavily at the beginning of her bath, let it soak while you do the rest of her washing and she plays in the tub if she likes to play there, then rinse well at the end of her bath. A hand-held shower head would be worth getting, so you can rinse her hair efficiently, and direct the water away from her face. Using a wide-tooth comb to detangle while her hair is full of the conditioner is also a good idea, as it avoids discomfort. You can continue to comb as you rinse, rather than rubbing her hair to rinse, so you don't create new tangles.

A gentle leave-in may also be good. Kimberlily's defrizz spray, and Fox's shea butter cream are both inexpensive to make and very gentle to use.

cch24
March 1st, 2010, 01:10 PM
This website www.beadsbraidsbeyond.blogspot.com has a lot of tutorials for styling her daughter's hair. I think it may be helpful in the future!

bumblebums
March 1st, 2010, 01:54 PM
Have a look here: http://www.tightlycurly.com/welcome/

This woman is half African American, half European, and she has a great website about growing up with white caretakers and not knowing how to take care of her hair... And of course now her hair is fabulous and long!

Props for looking into this early--I know some white parents of adopted AA kids who never did, and their kids' hair is a total mess... I figure it isn't my place to give them advice, so I keep my mouth shut, but knowing about the proper way to take care of natural 4a/b hair, it's hard!

ETA: link to instructions for kid hair, specifically: http://www.tightlycurly.com/technique/tipsforlittleones/

Twil
March 1st, 2010, 02:10 PM
No chemicals!!! Especially that young. The key trick to curls is moisture, moisture, moisture! I found www.naturallycurly.com (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/www.naturallycurly.com) really helpful, there's an entire forum dedicated for mom's with curly babies.
Also, comb, don't brush.

Anje
March 1st, 2010, 02:53 PM
As others have said, I'd suggest at least trying a conditioner-only routine for your baby. I like Suave Naturals for myself, and VO5 is also a favorite for COing around here. I doubt there's any need to use different products on her, since conditioner is generally pretty mild. If her hair feels dry, oil it. Coconut oil (look among the oils at the grocery store, not in haircare) and jojoba oil are favorites around here, but I think I've noticed that curlier hair often does well with more viscous oils like olive.

Skip the relaxers, including the no-lye ones marketed for children. They're all really harsh and can cause chemical burns to the scalp. Re-relaxing a section of hair multiple times (like you might do at home with a kit) will probably make it break.

Personally, I like the puffy ponytails and pigtails. Braids are also a good choice for AA hair, as long as they're not really tight. As soon as your little one is old enough to sleep with a pillow, you probably should get silk or satin pillow cases for her. (Dharma trading (http://www.dharmatrading.com/html/eng/1384272-AA.shtml?lnav=clothing.html) is a favorite place for silk pillowcases around here.) That should help hairstyles last a bit, which might mean you can braid at night and leave it in a few days, instead of styling her hair every morning.

lillithnight
March 1st, 2010, 03:44 PM
As a mixed race young woman I will tell something that no one has come out and said. You will have to make sure she knows that her hair is beautiful. She will want hair like her friends at some point in her life wether that hair is sraight or wavey or just a looser curl then she has depends on the friends she makes. You might even be dealing with more then one type scattered all over her head. I have sections of my hair that are 3c, sections that are 4a, and this odd part all over the top that is some uber small type 2 waves.

Her hair will require work, and it might be more then you are used to. You will need as she gets older if she is at all like me co washing conditioner, moisture/combing conditioner, leave in, sealant, and a styler. The leave in should probly be richer and thicker, her hair might not take to something that is lighter. The styler will depend on her hair to, I like eco styler olive oil gel for my hair. She might need something lighter though. For her when she get a bit older like about 1 aloe vera gel might be good.

camirra555
March 1st, 2010, 04:20 PM
Do. Not. Use. A. Relaxer.
Don't! It will not be good for her hair and scalp and it will start a ridiculous cycle of dependency on that junk- you know on black hair care boards, they call it "Creamy CRACK".
.

I completely agree. Whatever you do, don't relax it. My mom couldn't handle my hair and started getting it relaxed starting when I was 5. My hair never really grew long (past apl) and was always broken. Then when I was 17, I stopped relaxing and haven't looked back since. My hair is thriving now.

I also recommend checking out tightly curly as well as curly nikki's site (she has started showcasing styles for little girls)
http://www.curlynikki.com/

Sweetness
March 1st, 2010, 04:24 PM
You will have to make sure she knows that her hair is beautiful.


Thank you for mentioning this, I though about this too...
I think you have to be careful with your baby's self esteem. If her own mother thinks her natural hair is not good enough or pretty enough, and not just a beautiful hair to take care of in a natural way, that would be so sad for her growing up :(

4' type hair can be so beautiful !

loyaboya
March 2nd, 2010, 03:47 PM
This thread has lots of good advice! I just wanted to pop in to echo what someone else has said: her hair is probably gonna change a lot in the next few months (or years!). Just kinda go with the flow :) My nephew is 2 now, his dad is African and is mom is black American, and he was born with hair like an old Asian man (fine, stick straight and shiny as a mirror). It was so funny! It even had a natural side part. It stayed like that for a while but now he has more typical 4a hair. So you just never know... :)

xovictoryxo
March 2nd, 2010, 05:49 PM
Wow! What a wealth of information! :p
Lilithnight I agree it is so important to ensure her hair is naturally beautiful.
you all are right about going with the flow of things... who knows what the hair type will turn out to be.
I wont ever put chems in her hair, even if she begs me to!!
she told me to tell you all thank you :) lol

Gingevere
March 2nd, 2010, 07:46 PM
Oh my... she is waaay too adorable! And a cute sweater too. :)

kwaniesiam
March 2nd, 2010, 08:14 PM
She's adorable!

I agree with the chemical free approach while she is still young. If she gets older and is able to care for her hair herself, let her experiment how she wants but until then a nice natural care approach is probably best. Oils, conditioner only, gentle detangling with a very wide tooth comb when it gets longer, protective braids that aren't too tight, etc. are all great suggestions. Good luck!

loyaboya
March 3rd, 2010, 03:41 PM
omg she's too cute! look at those cheeks :)

angelthadiva
March 3rd, 2010, 05:29 PM
I think she's far too young to fully know what kind of hair she will have. There's a pretty good chance she will lose some of what she has now especially in the back; then it will regrow.

DH is black, I'm Hispanic, Native American and Caucasian, but going by DD8's hair, you can't tell she's mixed. We laugh that the "only" thing she got from me was my hair.

My mom lemented over DD's hair (before she was born) how was I ever going to do it, how would I do it; would she have "good" hair...Etc. DH was even putting oils in her hair when she was a wee baby (before I knew about oils) because she was "black" and needed oil in her hair :lol: DD8 does not have hair like ANY mixed kid I have ever seen. Ever. Her hair is a lot like mine, but a little darker, a little coarser, and had a little more curl to it.

Friend me; so you can see an album of hers. :D

http://i225.photobucket.com/albums/dd9/angelthadiva/Tutorials/100_0693.jpg

GoddesJourney
March 3rd, 2010, 06:29 PM
omg she's too cute! look at those cheeks :)

That's all I saw, cheeks and bright eyes.

xovictoryxo
March 4th, 2010, 10:37 AM
heeheeheh thank you
angel I am friending you now! :)

loyaboya
March 4th, 2010, 03:16 PM
I just saw this today on another board: http://www.happygirlhair.com/

This woman (white) adopted Ethiopian twin girls that have different hair types. Very informative!

Enjoy.

angelthadiva
March 4th, 2010, 03:20 PM
heeheeheh thank you
angel I am friending you now! :)


I wasn't trolling for friends, but I happily accepted :D then I noticed I don't have her albums blocked anyway :o

09robiha
March 4th, 2010, 03:57 PM
Hey everyone! I love this site it is so informative.
My baby is 4 months old now. and she is starting to grow some wild hair, (she is black greek italian...) its starting to get really curly and courser as the weeks go by. I am just going to prepare myself with knowledge now.

What kind of haircare and maintenance am I looking at?
What is a good shampoo, and moisturizer/ conditioner for ethnic hair?
what are some cute hair styles for really curly hair? i dont want to have just a pony tail that looks like a frizzy pom poms ;/ lol
My girlfriend told me her hair might be really brittle and heat is extremely damaging... so blow drying straight doesn't sound good. she says she brings her 5 year old daughter to the shop to get a perm (which in ethnic world it means straightened not curled like at my salon), doesn't this sound excessive for someone so young to get a chemical treatment??
i use mouse on my own hair for the curly look is this okay to use??
ah man I am nervous about her future hair
please forgive me for sounding so stupid ;(i lack on my own hair and I am truly researching now to prepare myself.


I agree with most people here. Dont relax or perm that childs hair its just asking for trouble. Take a look at this site and it should give you loads of answers..and all the members are lovely and should answer any questions :)

www.naturallycurly.com (http://www.naturallycurly.com)

xovictoryxo
December 21st, 2010, 09:44 PM
I posted this thread 9 months ago, Here is a current picture of my daughters very tight curls.

I am currently using Pink Moisturizing hair lotion.
any other recc's for products to soften curls?
I managed to get two small pigtails :)

JaneinMarch
December 22nd, 2010, 07:44 AM
Why not try a bit of extra virgin olive oil or virgin coconut oil? Since I cut my hair down to almost the length of your daughter's hair, I just need a couple drops of oil after I rinse it in the shower. My hair tends to be a little dry, btw.

Nae
December 22nd, 2010, 07:58 AM
Not that this is helpful at all but xovictoryxo, your little one is adorable!! I love that picture with her and the cat, those cheeks of hers are SO sweet. I awwwwed so loud my kids ran to see what I was looking at!

xovictoryxo
December 22nd, 2010, 10:16 AM
Thank you Nae!
Havent tried olive oil in her hair yet. Coconut oil worked okay for a few hours then went right back to dry.
Anyone have raves/rants about Carols daughter hair products?

GoddesJourney
December 22nd, 2010, 12:21 PM
Her skin and hair look just like my niece! You might try warming the oil. I hear this helps it soak in better. Also, if even coconut oil, which is a bit thicker, isn't doing the trick, you might want to try butters. I have a half and half shea and cocoa butter mix that I got from Amazon.com for my skin. It's really rich and unprocessed. I would experiment with that if I were you.

ScarlettAdelle
December 22nd, 2010, 01:43 PM
The perm iis mot likely overkill, especially since her young skin is so fragile. As a hairdresser I wouldn't recommend perming at all, ever, but if you're set on it, definately not until she's at least 12. I'm a mix og German, American Indian & black, and my hair was run through the ringer by a parent who had no idea how. To deal with my curls. I've had chemical straightening, reverse perms, hot combing *cringe* flat ironing, etc etc etc, and my hair and scalp are worse for the wear as a result. It's so nice to see a parent asking for help instead of jumping in uneducated and emotionally and/or physically scarring your child for life. On behalf of your daughter's hair and scalp, thank you.

That being said, most people of mixed race have dry, brittle hair. Moisture is your friend. So is protein. I use reparative shampoo even though my hair isn't really damaged at this point. You will also want to give her scalp massages to stimulate her scalp and heep it healthy. This is best done while she's in the bath tub or while oiling her hair at night. As an added bonus, this can be an amazing mother/daughter bonding experience, kind of like teaching her to cook, or ride a bike, or care for a car.

As for styling, a leave in conditioner is a must. You'll want to keep away from anything with panthenol and or alcohols in it as it can dry the hair and undo all of your conditioning efforts. A styling cream, as another user mentioned, is an excellent suggestion. A lot of mixed hair also benefits from roller setting. I'm not sure how old your daughter is or if she'd sit still long enough for the set, but if she will, i'd strongly suggest it.

Another thing you might hear is that you have to pull the hair to make it grow. Ignore this, it's a wivestale. The scalp massage will stimulate bloodflow and encourage growth,

Feel free to message me with any questions

Intransigentia
December 22nd, 2010, 01:51 PM
I have no advice because my hair is the opposite of your daughter's, but every picture of her just brings a smile to my face. What a sweetie.

mrs_coffee
December 22nd, 2010, 02:44 PM
Oh gosh, she is a little doll! Beautiful.

virgo75
December 22nd, 2010, 02:44 PM
Oh my goodness your baby girl is just sooo cute!!! :crush:

Her curls are lovely too.

I haven't heard rave reviews on Carol's Daughter, but have had pretty good results using Africa's Best Kids Organics Shea Butter Detangling Moisturizing Lotion(the name is way too long lol) on my daughter's tightly curly hair. Link here: http://www.buzzillions.com/reviews/kids-africas-best-organics-shea-butter-detangling-moisturizing-hair-reviews
It does detangle well, which will come in handy as your daughter's hair gets longer and fills in.

Pink Oil Moisturizer seems to make the hair moisturized at first, then it feels dry later on. At least it did on my daughter's hair.

Oils alone don't always cut it for ethnic hair, but using them after a leave-in conditioner, or mixed in with one works much better to keep hair moisturized.

If you don't want to buy a new product, you could also try just leaving in some rinse out conditioner followed by oil or mixed with oil.

Anytime you mix oils with conditioner you might want to start with a 3:1 ratio of conditioner to oil so her hair isn't oily all day, but moisturized.

Hope that helps. :flower:

Chocolat
December 22nd, 2010, 04:12 PM
Hey everyone! I love this site it is so informative.
My baby is 4 months old now. and she is starting to grow some wild hair, (she is black greek italian...) its starting to get really curly and courser as the weeks go by. I am just going to prepare myself with knowledge now.

What kind of haircare and maintenance am I looking at?
What is a good shampoo, and moisturizer/ conditioner for ethnic hair?
what are some cute hair styles for really curly hair? i dont want to have just a pony tail that looks like a frizzy pom poms ;/ lol
My girlfriend told me her hair might be really brittle and heat is extremely damaging... so blow drying straight doesn't sound good. she says she brings her 5 year old daughter to the shop to get a perm (which in ethnic world it means straightened not curled like at my salon), doesn't this sound excessive for someone so young to get a chemical treatment??
i use mouse on my own hair for the curly look is this okay to use??
ah man I am nervous about her future hair
please forgive me for sounding so stupid ;(i lack on my own hair and I am truly researching now to prepare myself.

Tight curls are tricky, but once you learn what they need . I don't recommend chemically altering kids hair, and you definitely don't need to straighten her hair to manage it. These websites have enough info to get you started:

www.happygirlhair.com

http://beadsbraidsbeyond.blogspot.com/

www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk

They are really informative and I hope you like them. Good Luck!

Ursula
December 22nd, 2010, 04:23 PM
Well, first of all, everyone is ethnic, of some sort.

Your best bet is to start by reading about the hair typing system that is used here, and at other hair care websites, and figure out your child's hair type by this. It's not the ethnicity that matters, its the hair type, and within ethnic groups there can be considerable variation.

If you're child's hair is in the 3 or 4 curliness level, you might want to check out the website naturallycurly.com, which focuses more on curly hair, and has sections on caring for children in particular.

angelthadiva
December 22nd, 2010, 05:14 PM
What a cutie she is!! I can't echo the coconut oil enough. I use the regular cooking kind now, but when DD was a wee baby I used the Softee brand that is a blend of jojoba and coconut oil that is specifically designed for hair and scalp. It smells divine, much more pronounced scent than the cooking kind. I still have some of it, so a little goes a long ways!

I agree with the other poster who said moisture and protein are your friend. I'd also be very wary of any harsh chemicals on wee baby :)

KBG
December 22nd, 2010, 07:22 PM
The info from Teri LaFlesh's site (& book) is wonderful for all of the curlies in this house. My children range from type 2 to 3, I'm a mixed type 4 and I've been able to tweak LaFlesh's advice w/ great success. Your daughter's hair looks a bit curlier than my oldest child's but less tight than mine.

http://www.tightlycurly.com/welcome/

For the children: Daily or every other day, I use a spritz bottle with warm water to dampen the hair...then apply about a nickle to quarter size(depending on length of hair) of instant conditioner(Suave, Trader Joe's Nourish Spa) mixed with a few drops of Olive Oil. ...I rub it in my palms first and distribute evenly...massaging from root to tip.

This moisturizes the hair & lets me comb or brush it easily.

You can also apply this in the bath after rinsing the hair. BTW, I conditioner wash( 'co-wash') 90 percent of the time instead of shampooing.

As your daughter's hair grows (or maybe now) you can try some of the twist or twirled 'doodle' styles that Teri shows. I really recommend her book. There are some children's styles on this page

http://www.tightlycurly.com/photos/beforeandafter/

When my daughter's hair was too short to make braids and ponys..after moisturizing, I'd just brush through it with a Denman brush in small sections for a curly-fro look. The water, conditioner-oil mix and brush help the curls to smooth & clump to be curly-coily rather than frizzy. Now I'm able to brush and smooth it into two braids. In general for girls i find that it's easier the longer the hair gets. Short to medium can be an awkward phase.

I also truly pray you don't try the relaxer 'perm' for her hair. My parents wouldn't allow me to have one until I was high school (some of my friends had them and I felt left out) and it was a period of total hair hell for me. Burns, scabs, hair loss, poor length retention, overlapping treatments leading to breakage. ...Just a really ugly time. If she wants an occasional straight look as a teen, there's always blow dryers with comb attachments or flat irons.

If something doesn't make sense here, feel free to send me a PM with more questions!

GeeLove
December 23rd, 2010, 03:21 AM
pink moisturizer will leave her hair dry. the only carol's daughter product i've heard that people overwhelmingly like is the hair milk. she changed her formula once she was in a larger market and now her products make the hair feel dry.

i take care of my 3 niece's hair w/ water, suave conditioner, and coconut oil. it helps keep them moisturized and the 5yr old has wl hair. i like to think my love and care has helped her reach that length.

glad to read you won't entertain putting a chemical relaxer in her hair. she has beautiful curls and is such an adorable child.

Unicorn
December 23rd, 2010, 01:44 PM
I'm echoing the 'no pink moisturiser' advice. I used it for a while some years back and while it initially gives the illusion of moisturising, it actually causes dryness in the longer term as it contains petrolium oils which are drying (seals out moisture) to the hair.

I met many women of African descent who had the same problem (massive breakage) having used it for several months. It was quite a while working out the culprit as the Pink Moisturiser 'seems' ideal. However, everyone I know, who used it had the breakage problem which improved when they stopped using it.

Essentially you need to avoid anything that includes petrolium oils in the ingredients.

Carols Daughter has several oil in water moisturisers which work well

Unicorn

KBG
December 23rd, 2010, 02:01 PM
Yes, that Luster's Pink Oil Lotion is heinous. Awful stuff.

KBG
December 23rd, 2010, 02:09 PM
pink moisturizer will leave her hair dry. the only carol's daughter product i've heard that people overwhelmingly like is the hair milk. she changed her formula once she was in a larger market and now her products make the hair feel dry.

i take care of my 3 niece's hair w/ water, suave conditioner, and coconut oil. it helps keep them moisturized and the 5yr old has wl hair. i like to think my love and care has helped her reach that length.

glad to read you won't entertain putting a chemical relaxer in her hair. she has beautiful curls and is such an adorable child.

:agree: It's amazing that such simple things are the best! I alternate between coconut and olive oil...sometimes grapeseed oil :magic:

I used to premix the condish and oil and have it a squeeze bottle to apply after wetting the hair but lately I just mix it in my hands.

KBG
December 23rd, 2010, 02:12 PM
found this relevant page in Google search.

http://textureplayground.info/2008_11_01_archive.html

xovictoryxo
December 23rd, 2010, 02:34 PM
Thank you so much ladies! Wow I love this site!
I am having to write all of this down. :)
I had no idea petroleum is bad for the hair and that it was in the pink lotion. It was working somewhat but i noticed the dry/courseness getting worse on the back of her head! her hair is getting longer and you cant tell because the curls are so tight. My hair likes the pink moisturizing lotion, however.
KBG: I am going to try this twist method and purchase that book. thank you, you are so informative.
Scarlett: I am glad you cleared that up about that pulling method, a few people have told me to try that, i would NEVER pull my daughters hair.
I love all the information I am getting here. I noticed Her hair does love 100% shea butter. it doesnt smell good tho, kind of like cooking grease. I wonder if I add some sort of oil to it to smell better it would work. I am going to make a mist this weekend of the water, conditioner, and oil.
Thank you for the wealth of information ladies!
again for the record I am not ever planning on chemically straightening her hair! I have heard terrible things about the burns and all of that. Curls are so beautiful, its just a little tougher to manage them.

xovictoryxo
December 23rd, 2010, 02:40 PM
Also, We both say thank you for the compliments. :)

Avital88
December 23rd, 2010, 02:41 PM
My daughter is mixed too. Dominican curls!! ow lord they are hard to handle..
Your daughter is super cute!

xovictoryxo
December 23rd, 2010, 02:49 PM
Thanks Avital, Just looked at a pic of your beautiful daughter in your photo album, the hair type is pretty much the same.
When I brush her hair it gets SO frizzy and poofy. :(

wendy51
December 23rd, 2010, 03:46 PM
what is ethnic kids lol

KBG
December 23rd, 2010, 05:37 PM
So glad I could help!! My mom never figured out how to do my hair. lolz. This morning we were looking through old photos and I was cringing the entire time. Anything to save another curly from that fate!

Ok, I only brush through the hair when it's totally wet and has conditioner in it(best if you can leave it to sit for at least 5 mins but I know that with small children that's not always easy).

Start brushing at the ends and work my way up towards the scalp.

Here's some info on choosing good brushes:

http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/3c/105022-denman-brush-would-you-recommend-3c-4a-hair.html

http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/4a/81215-denman-brush-information-d3-d4-not-curly-thick-hair.html

http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/4a/116665-denman-d31-d41.html


Oh and what I did with my shea butter: I found it too waxy and thick(and yah, sort of weird smelling) so I mixed it with food grade coconut oil.

http://www.amazon.com/Extra-Virgin-Coconut-Oil-32/dp/B001AG6BMO

I put equal amounts in a metal bowl and melt them together by holding small bowl inside another larger containing hot water. I hope that makes sense?..like melting chocolate but less heat? I find the shea-coco mix lighter and better-smelling.


I later learned about this mix here at LHC

"Fox's Shea Butter Conditioning Cream"

http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=4586

It's awesome too.:cheese:

lacefrost
December 23rd, 2010, 07:24 PM
This website www.beadsbraidsbeyond.blogspot.com (http://www.beadsbraidsbeyond.blogspot.com) has a lot of tutorials for styling her daughter's hair. I think it may be helpful in the future!


Have a look here: http://www.tightlycurly.com/welcome/

This woman is half African American, half European, and she has a great website about growing up with white caretakers and not knowing how to take care of her hair... And of course now her hair is fabulous and long!

Props for looking into this early--I know some white parents of adopted AA kids who never did, and their kids' hair is a total mess... I figure it isn't my place to give them advice, so I keep my mouth shut, but knowing about the proper way to take care of natural 4a/b hair, it's hard!

ETA: link to instructions for kid hair, specifically: http://www.tightlycurly.com/technique/tipsforlittleones/
Totally agree with those ladies!! I've learned styles and techniques from those places myself!



http://photos-g.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs157.snc3/18441_1313668436487_1073943460_30997724_1025950_n. jpg



Cutest.baby.evar.

GeeLove
December 23rd, 2010, 09:18 PM
:agree: It's amazing that such simple things are the best! I alternate between coconut and olive oil...sometimes grapeseed oil :magic:

I used to premix the condish and oil and have it a squeeze bottle to apply after wetting the hair but lately I just mix it in my hands.


i buy all of our oils except coconut and castor from ross or marshall's food section. we have a huge thing of grapeseed oil and i notice when i use it, her hair lays down much better when i smooth it for ponytails. i am a grapeseed oil fan! (sorry to thread-jack)

Arya
December 23rd, 2010, 11:02 PM
I can't imagine putting chemicals on my little girl's head. All those chemicals can't be good for you!! I think all the kids on here have BEAUTIFUL hair!! I was super obsessed with micro braids as a kid, with a bead and aluminum foil at the ends. I thought it looked so gorgeous. I still think thick natural hair in all it's many forms looks beautiful. I can't imagine why someone wouldn't like it. Probably jealousy, or because they know it's a cultural sore point. Whatever, I think it's AWESOME!


p.s. ethnic refers to cultural background which recognizes more genetic flow, race is a cultural construction that people can be genetically categorized into separate and distinct 'races', which they can't. Everyone is a 'mix'. Every country has had different waves of settlement, conquering, trade routes, intermarriage, etc. to imagine that we all fit neatly into little raced boxes.

xovictoryxo
December 29th, 2010, 12:34 PM
thanks for all your help girls! I feel a lot more prepared.
I have Carols daughter hair milk on the way to me! they had a special 20% off discount and free shipping, which is supurb! Hope it works for her, i will also try it on my wavy an frizzy hair.
her curls cooperated with me today using just shea butter and olive oil :) they were formed very nicely. I use the twist method at night. I think I am going to get her a silk pillow to sleep on to stop the breakage that is happening in the back of her hair. that section is incredible course and gets easily matted. so far all out of everything i used, this section is the most resiliant, the part she lays her head on, so i am thinking it has to do with the cotton bedsheets.
also, I want apologize for using terms that are not politically correct (ethnic) Of course there are different hairtypes in every culture, however I was just trying to refer to african american hair in particular which is a bit different in maintenance in comparison to other hairtypes. the products i use in my hair are terrible for hers and vice versa. again i didnt intend to offend anyone so please accept my apology.! :)

Arya
December 30th, 2010, 12:17 PM
I don't think you should have to apologize for using the term 'Ethnic'! I mean, people throw it around all the time (like my grocery store, the hair care aisle, etc). it's just unfortunate that it's become a code for 'non-White Western European' when those are 'Ethnicities' as well! Our society is just funny like that.

KBG
January 1st, 2011, 01:38 AM
totally..here in California they call the Afro-American hair section the 'ethnic' hair section.

My mom uses the expression 'ethnic' for anyone ambiguous ...where she doesn't know the precise background but the person appears mixed race/brunette and darker-skinned/'off-white' or very fair Creoles/Mediterranean, etc....she also calls some Northern and Eastern Europeans 'ethnic' when they're blonde w/ rounded features, super curly hair and/or full lips.

I don't see the word in a negative sense at all.

RoseRed27
January 1st, 2011, 05:44 PM
The reason many people don't like to hear the term "ethnic" is because no one uses the word properly. It is mostly used as a pseudo-politically correct word for "not white". Would it be so confusing to put the black and Hispanic hair care products in the hair care section? :confused: I have never seen an "ethnic" cosmetic section, yet I've found make up that works for my needs. Another thing about the separate sections, it make some people feel uncomfortable wandering in the other sections. I can't tell you the number of people who think using "white" products will make their hair fall out. :rolleyes: And many times, it's the same product with different marketing! lol Mousse and wrap foam are identical!

I know the OP didn't mean any harm, but I don't see the problem with telling her it would be more acceptable if she said mixed or biracial instead of ethnic. Just like my fiance who actually thought the correct term for Afro textured hair was "nappy". (!!!!) If he had said that around the wrong person...:boxer:I explained that some have no problem with that term, but others consider it rude. I find it annoying when people call me "ethnic". I think it's fairly obvious by looking at me that I'm black. It's not a secret. I actually had a manager who would whisper the word black as if it were dirty! "Please give this pamphlet to Sarah, she's one of the new girls, the black one." :p I guess some people think ethnic is more polite, but considering every person has an ethnicity, it's the wrong term. And I think many find it patronizing.

As for advice for that cute baby. No relaxer, no pink oil! ^__^ Pink oil is just garbage that makes hair feel moisturized, but over time will cause brittleness. I made a leave in for my little brother (mixed as well) who has his heart set on growing a 'fro. :afro: Among various oils, water and a bit of conditioner, it has just the tiniest amount of apple cider vinegar to bring the pH down and smooth the cuticle, meaning little to no snagging or tangles. You might have to try a few things to find what works best, because as we all know all hair is different. I used to love a glycerin based spritz. And castor oil, shea butter or a touch of liquid lanolin helped to bring out the softness and seal in moisture. (might be a bit tricky washing it out the first few times) Trader Joe's conditioners and Avalon organics honeysuckle rose conditioner have a cult following. I think your answer might be using a conditioner as a leave in followed by an oil or butter (oil in a creamy non-liquid form) to "seal". There is a lot of information on this site and others. I don't think anyone has mentioned Curly Nikki. It's a blog with a wealth of information and Nikki herself is recently a new mom, try searching her site for tips.

I think the best piece of advice on this thread was to let the child know that she and her hair are beautiful.:)

xovictoryxo
January 4th, 2011, 02:58 PM
thanks for the advice and also the clarification on the ethnic term. LOL I really just wanted to make sure I didnt offend anyone.
So the Carols Daughter Hair Milk came yesterday, and her hair seemed to love it!! I used it on her dry hair and the curls formed almost instantly. now today I will try it on her wet hair after the bath.
The trick really is to find a good conditioner to soak her hair in, right now i am using some form of baby chamomile conditioner, but i can tell its not that great- it smells great tho. I also sometimes use this keratin conditioner my girlfriend got me from brazil but i dont use it often as i try to spare it. it smells delicious like cocoa though :) her hair seems to like it. not sure if i could ever replace the bottle though-

Arya
January 5th, 2011, 08:27 PM
thanks for the advice and also the clarification on the ethnic term. LOL I really just wanted to make sure I didnt offend anyone.
So the Carols Daughter Hair Milk came yesterday, and her hair seemed to love it!! I used it on her dry hair and the curls formed almost instantly. now today I will try it on her wet hair after the bath.
The trick really is to find a good conditioner to soak her hair in, right now i am using some form of baby chamomile conditioner, but i can tell its not that great- it smells great tho. I also sometimes use this keratin conditioner my girlfriend got me from brazil but i dont use it often as i try to spare it. it smells delicious like cocoa though :) her hair seems to like it. not sure if i could ever replace the bottle though-

By Keratin conditioner...you don't mean the famed 'brazilian blowout' do you? >___<

xovictoryxo
January 5th, 2011, 09:33 PM
no not at all. it is just a conditioner that has keratin as its main ingredient.

wendy51
January 18th, 2011, 06:28 PM
I think for kids you could do natural things like mixing olive oil in your deep conditioner and always have a spritz bottle of water+aloe vera to use as humectant ^^
Do very simple is better ^^, and cute protective styles help even more =].

For the word 'ethnic', for me, in France, i'm not used to hear that word. To me, 'ethnic' is synonyme of all different groups of people. That's why i asked, it seemed abstract. i had to look at the photo of your daughter to see that she is African (Descent) and confy you little advices.
I don't know, children of my neighbour are icelandic, this is ethnic. but this unecesseary to say so.

curlychica702
March 6th, 2011, 08:48 PM
here is a website happygirlhair.com it has alot of info that i think will help her, but please dont take her to get a perm (which is more commonly called a relaxer). its way to harsh especially for a little one. make sure you keep her hair moisturized as she gets older that very importent to avoid breakage and damage. hairlista.com is another good website where you can talk to women that have a similer hair type to your daughter and can give you advice (^_^)

curlychica702
March 6th, 2011, 09:03 PM
also another good webiste is tightlycurly.com this lady teri laflesh also wrote a book called "curly like me" u should read it(:

good products for her hair would be olive oil, coconut oil, aloe vera jell, shea butter, thick hair (lotions) moisturizers, sulfate free shampoos, and thick conditioners, BUT STAY AWAY FROMA NTHING THING WITH MINERAL OIL, OR PATROLIUM IN IT!!! it is also a good idea for you to learn how to cornrow and two strand twist, those will be good styles for when she is older that will protect her hair and not damage it and also reduce breakage as long as they arnt done too tight, and also very cute for kids. using heat on her hair is not a good idea, when shes waaaaaaay older its okay to to everyonce in a while.

Maelyssa
March 6th, 2011, 10:15 PM
I haven't tried these products yet but I plan on ordering this week....they may work...
http://www.curls.biz/curly-hair-products/baby-curly-hair-products.html

When my daughters were that young I actually used Carol's Daughter Tui Herbal Shampoo & Suave conditioners & used some of the Suave as a leave in as well. At one point a man stopped me in Target to ask me what I used on my baby's hair (she was 1 or so at the time) because his daughter was biracial & he was struggling with her hair.
I advised the same thing to him....basically sulfate free shampoo, lots of Suave (or something similar) to condition plus a good leave-in.
Good luck...she's a total doll! :D


P.S. I haven't tried Carol's Daughter products in years because I know they did a LOT of reformulation & I'm not sure if the products will work the same. I've heard rave reviews of their hair milk & am tempted to buy some myself but I think I'm going to first go for some of these products from curls.biz before I try out the hair milk.

CoilyCurlyME
April 11th, 2011, 11:37 AM
I think that co-washing will work great when she gets older, also in my own hair(I'm half african and half european)when i do co-wash i see less frizz and more defined soft curls. But use a gently sulfate free shampoo instead and a good conditioner/deep conditioner here's also works perfect for a detangler. Styles such as braids, twist, braid outs, twist outs, afro puff, buns, cornrows, flat twist, ponytails or maybe down and out can be very cute, espectular with a little accesorie like an flower or a cute hair band. Products that works great for styling do i think is coconut oil, sheabutter, Aubrey Organics B5 Designer Gel, aloe vera mixed with water, leave-in conditioner mixed with sheabutter and oil, Kinky-Curly products they do also have a line for kids called Tiny Twirls. MyHoneyChild, Bee Mine, Aubrey Organics are also good brands. :)

Hairkay
July 9th, 2016, 03:40 AM
I saw this video and I think it fits into this thread.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mvl-4jZbbg8

I once saw someone mention using a hair steamer on children. I'd be horrified to let such a young child sit under an electric steamer for some time. This hot cap idea in the video sounds perfect.

It kind of reminded me of when my niece was that age. We'd take turns to lay her across our laps and gently deal with her hair she'd fall asleep before we were finished. As she got older then our laps became her pillow. That's how it's commonly done in the Caribbbean.

lapushka
July 9th, 2016, 03:52 AM
You follow her as well, Hairkay? I was about to link the same video here! :lol: She's a lovely lady, isn't she?

Hairkay
July 9th, 2016, 04:41 AM
You follow her as well, Hairkay? I was about to link the same video here! :lol: She's a lovely lady, isn't she?

Yes, she comes up with some great hair styles.

H o n є y ❤
July 9th, 2016, 09:46 AM
Awww your daughter must have grown up so much by now. 😶

Hairkay
July 28th, 2016, 10:45 AM
Awww your daughter must have grown up so much by now. ��

It was my niece. She has indeed grown up.