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View Full Version : Do people constantly badger you to flat iron?



coscass
February 6th, 2010, 08:15 PM
My one friend is ALWAYS asking me to flat iron my hair, or to let her flat iron my hair. We went to beauty school together, so while I was there (before I went natural) I used to let her. Sure I liked it, but my end never looked right. They were always curly and rough. She'd always say, "we just need to turn the heat up!"

I can't believe I ever let that happen to my hair.

I tell her no, but it really bothers me when she tries to link me to flat irons that she claims "won't damage your hair". Some Bs, huh? I know I don't have to do anything I don't want to, but it's just irritating. She was trying to talk me into letting her use her new "mineral-plated-safe-for-hair" flat iron, and then telling me about her wet-to-dry one.

I cringed so badly:mad:

It seems like no matter how many times I say no, she doesn't get the idea. Why does my hair have to be straight to be pretty?

Twil
February 6th, 2010, 08:21 PM
Not so much badgering, but whenever someone compliments my hair, they always suggest I flat iron it. Like:
"OMG your hair is so curly and long!"
"Thank you,"
"Have you ever thought of straightening it?"

without fail, it's always the follow up question. :rolleyes:

curlycrown
February 6th, 2010, 08:49 PM
Every time I wear my hair out I get the compliments about how pretty it is and then someone has to ask, "why dont you ever straighten your hair?" I get annoyed and tell them that i just dont feel like doing it and i dont want it straight.

contradiction
February 6th, 2010, 08:59 PM
It doesn't sound like she is saying your hair has to be straight to be pretty. She probably just wants someone to experiment on.

Liluri
February 6th, 2010, 09:29 PM
I'm amused to see this as a few days ago a friend asked me if I'd been in a hurry or I'd just washed my hair as my bun was less than immaculate. I explained I'd wet bunned it and in the humidity it had frizzed a bit and the suggestion was to just heat straighten all of my hair and then it would do that.

I had to bite my tongue as a mini rant would have been triggered about all the ways this was wrong and how damaging that would be just for the sake of a neater bun. *sigh*

Liluri
February 6th, 2010, 09:32 PM
I'm amused to see this as a few days ago a friend asked me if I'd been in a hurry or I'd just washed my hair as my bun was less than immaculate. I explained I'd wet bunned it and in the humidity it had frizzed a bit and the suggestion was to just heat straighten all of my hair and then it would do that.

I had to bite my tongue as a mini rant would have been triggered about all the ways this was wrong and how damaging that would be just for the sake of a neater bun. *sigh*

christine1989
February 6th, 2010, 09:37 PM
She probobly belives all of those claims that "they wont damage your hair". If she realized that ALL heat damages hair then i'm sure she would stop pressuring you.

Qadupae
February 6th, 2010, 09:48 PM
Not so much badgering, but whenever someone compliments my hair, they always suggest I flat iron it. Like:
"OMG your hair is so curly and long!"
"Thank you,"
"Have you ever thought of straightening it?"

without fail, it's always the follow up question. :rolleyes:

I don't personally have curly hair, but I used to have a friend with longer and curly hair. Same thing happened to her. Its odd that people will do that compliment with a double message. I was never sure if it was meant just as an experimental suggestion or if people really felt her hair should have been straightened. She never cared and never took it as an insult, but I was always bothered by it because I adored her hair as is. Maybe that's just my perpetual irritation with people in general :shrug:

Cheeks1206
February 6th, 2010, 09:50 PM
When I was in high school I would get that a lot, but that was also before I learned how to take care of and style curly hair. My hair was a frizzy mess, but I still disliked sitting there for 30+ minutes doing my hair.

walterSCAN
February 6th, 2010, 10:21 PM
I have 1a hair, so you really wouldn't expect me to be able to say yes to this question...

HOWEVER,

When I was in high school I did theatre (acting and worked as a tech in makeup) and one of my friends at the time (who had curly hair that she always straightened) used to beg me to let her use the straightener on it backstage... as though it could become any straighter!! I let her do it once, after making the stipulation that the flat iron had to be on the lowest setting, and lo and behold there was absolutely no difference... even after that she would still ask. ::facepalm::

She never did come up with a coherent reason for wanting to do that... :shrug:

Johanna
February 6th, 2010, 11:36 PM
My future sister in laws were doing their hair for a cocktail party. I was helping them get ready by doing the older ones hair. The younger one was straightening her her and then told me that they should use the straightener on my hair to see what it looked like.
Of course I declined, but the funny thing is, if you just run a brish through my hair it pus any waves out and goes dead straight on its own.

My fiance and I like to go shopping at the mall together (I managed to get a good one that likes shopping). Quite often theres those booths where they're selling fire weapons for hair. My fiance is adorable, he always puts himself between them and myself as we're walking by.
One time a sales person was really trying for the hard sell, to stop them hassling us any longer he told them I wasn't alowed to have one. Looked at me and I pretended to be scared of him.
Fun times :D

krazycurlsmatt
February 7th, 2010, 12:06 AM
Quite often theres those booths where they're selling fire weapons for hair.

I like the term "fire weapons for hair"!

People only ever ask me to flat iron my hair to see the length. I decline every time, because if I wanted to see the true length I could just pull it straight, and entertain myself by watching it bounce back up.

beez1717
February 7th, 2010, 12:46 AM
In my opinion The beauty of hair is that it comes in to different shapes and sizes. I personally like straight hair better than curly hair, but I like healthy hair most of all. Frying it is stupid. Keep your healthy curls. It will always look better them fried straight hair!!!!

Alcenaia
February 7th, 2010, 12:47 AM
The term "fire weapons for hair" also amuses me.

Why has straightening become so accepted? I think curls are so beautiful. Way to stick to what's best for your hair, curlies.

I currently have my hair up in pin curls because I'd like to have curls sometimes without the use of a curling iron. :)

pepperminttea
February 7th, 2010, 01:46 AM
Why has straightening become so accepted? I think curls are so beautiful. Way to stick to what's best for your hair, curlies.

Come to think of it, ditto. Georgians were very pro-curly, so were the Victorians, the flappers loved their pincurls, and the less said about the eighties, the better. :p Definitely agreed though - curls are beautiful. Growing up, my dream hair was always red curls! :)

To the OP: I don't generally get badgered per say, but my hair is a 1B/1C after a couple of days of combing have their way with it, and most of my friends know and accept my 'crazy natural ways' and don't ask me. :D

Dreams_in_Pink
February 7th, 2010, 02:34 AM
I'm not forced into flat ironing, but some people do suggest having it blowdried to straight at a salon. I say no and they swoosh away :D

Kuchen
February 7th, 2010, 02:36 AM
I honestly just think it's curiosity sometimes. I remember watching a friend with long, super curly hair have it blown straight by a hairdresser, and the transformation was extraordinary. Changed her whole face, and her hair came down to her elbows.
It's not necessarily something sinister, although I understand the anti-curl thing and why it's a problem.

Fethenwen
February 7th, 2010, 02:42 AM
Isn't unnaturally super straightened hair really out now? I mean out by hair fashion standards? But it really seems to stick hard to the mainstream this straightening thing, like really hard. I think it looks alright if used as a tool to actually style hair, but just straightening it to look dead straight looks just harsh and distasteful to me.

Dreams_in_Pink
February 7th, 2010, 03:05 AM
Isn't unnaturally super straightened hair really out now? I mean out by hair fashion standards? But it really seems to stick hard to the mainstream this straightening thing, like really hard. I think it looks alright if used as a tool to actually style hair, but just straightening it to look dead straight looks just harsh and distasteful to me.

fashion found a way to fix those dead-straight ends with a flat-iron...now you should turn the iron inwards as you reach the ends :D

practikalmagik
February 7th, 2010, 03:37 AM
When I was 16 (before straighteners really took off over in England) one of my friends wanted my hair straight for a party and I went along with it for a laugh and she blowdried it straight. Perfectly straight. It lasted for about 10 mins before my hair started getting wavy again LOL.

I had my hair vv short about 4/5 years ago and used the wet-to-straight straighteners. My mum would be horrified but i'd calmly inform her it was just the steam not my hair burning....what was I thinking!?

Never again. My hair will not stay straight on it's own so why force it. I don't look right with it hanging straight down round my face anyway. Waves and Curls forever!

Clarisse
February 7th, 2010, 05:58 AM
People often ask me the question too - but I just tell them no... My hair is easily manipulated, and by simply blowdrying my hair on a cool setting and brushing my hair, it gets 1b-ish. No need to use flat irons. My hair looks super thin, if I flat iron it, and the ends looks weird.

Finoriel
February 7th, 2010, 06:17 AM
No :wink: they usually ask me which straightening-iron I use.
See hair-type :p and when they find out that my hair is_in_fact_that_flat_naturally then they ask why I donīt curl it or get a perm.
:crazyq: :shrug: Just the usual beauty-nuttiness I guess.

Masara
February 7th, 2010, 08:43 AM
Showing my age :p but when I was in secondary school everybody had to have wavy or curly hair. If you didn't use curling irons or hot rollers on your hair every day, there was something wrong with you. Unless of course, you had a perm. Even curly haired people were expected to use something to get the curls "right".

Now it's dead straight. Of course, those of us with 1c/2a type hair will never win :brickwall

Nobody has ever suggested I flat iron. but then nobody outside of my family has seen my hair long enough to flat iron and down since I started putting it up before it even hit my shoulders.

Living in France may help too. I teach kids up to 16 years old and only a couple per class have obviously flat ironed hair. The rest seem to accept what they've got or maybe they just have a healthier attitude to hair; I had a mother mention her 12 year old daughter was complaining that her hair wasn't flat enough (yes, she really said flat, not straight) but neither of them mentioned even blow drying it straighter. It was more, "it would be nice to have it flatter, but it isn't, so I just have to accept that"

rags
February 7th, 2010, 08:59 AM
Showing my age :p but when I was in secondary school everybody had to have wavy or curly hair. If you didn't use curling irons or hot rollers on your hair every day, there was something wrong with you. Unless of course, you had a perm. Even curly haired people were expected to use something to get the curls "right".

Now it's dead straight. Of course, those of us with 1c/2a type hair will never win :brickwall



This mirrors my own experience - when I was in hgih school I was badgered to get a perm (and did!). Now I'm told I should straighten it. Sigh.

elina333
February 7th, 2010, 09:07 AM
Yeah whats up with the straight-hair-madness??? Why is everybody in love with straight hair? Funny... I had a guy at work laugh at my hair once, when I wore it curly. He was like: "Haha nice hair!" and then he giggled like a little girl and pointed at me. Why would someone do that?? (He is bald btw, so HAHA)

spidermom
February 7th, 2010, 09:17 AM
Only my DD has urged me to let her flat-iron my hair. It really looks stunning that way, but my goal length is still a year away so I don't want to risk damaging it. Too bad.

Locksmith
February 7th, 2010, 09:38 AM
I used to get badgered a lot to straighten my hair. Given that I'm a 1a, it always seemed an incredibly pointless thing to do...

Gvnagitlvgei
February 7th, 2010, 09:49 AM
"You'd look so pretty if you straightened your hair." I used to hear that one in jr. high.

I look marvelous with or without it anyway. People can be so ridiculous.

wookermuffin
February 7th, 2010, 10:00 AM
In middle school my mom used to say that I should straighten my hair, that was back when my hair was straightish but had some odd waves in it and was always frizzy (plus i rarely brushed or combed it, only used shampoo even though I swim 4 days a week).

In eighth grade my hair got started to get really curly and I started to get asked if I curled it.

littlemoon
February 7th, 2010, 02:06 PM
I look marvelous with or without it anyway.

:) best attitude to have!

verene
February 7th, 2010, 08:22 PM
I've had my hair flat-ironed before and I'm naturally a 1b. 3 times by friends and once by my sister. I don't know why any of them wanted to iron my hair straighter than it already is, I think it was more of getting me to do "something" with my hair.

Two of the friends were in high school, and it was more an experiment to see what would happen. My hair looked very straight and long. Until a draft touched it, then it would look normal again.

Once was in college - a new friend decided we should do eachother's hair. Was amusing, and an interesting experience for both of us, as our hair is opposite ends of the hair typing spectrum. She wanted to curl my hair and used a iron to on it before curlers because that is what she needs to do to her hair to curl it. The flat-iron killed my hair to the point it wouldn't curl at all.

My sister repeated the experiment. Having my prior experiences with flat irons I thought it wouldn't do anything. Still I decided to go through with in in the name of sibling-bonding. :rolleyes: The iron didn't make much of a difference in how my hair looked, but it shredded it. Every strand split, and I wasn't able to salvage it with DC and oil. I finally chopped 3 or 4 inches off.

I've learned now. Flat irons don't do ANYTHING for my hair except destroy it. Even one use on low heat as was done with my sister's iron. As I can barely use a blow-drier on low I don't know why I didn't figure out that heat destroys my fine hair earlier.

While straightening hair still seems to be popular amongst the tween and teen crowd (judging the customers I see at work), natural hair, and sometimes curls, looks to be in for the older crowd. Perhaps the need to straighten is coming to an end. I'm noticing more long hair (BSL - waist/hip), and more styling being done through braids and buns, so we might be moving into a new fashion era. Then again I may just see a weird demographic.

luckypenny
February 7th, 2010, 08:49 PM
My hair is very curly and ladies at work often ask me why I don't flat iron it more often. My answer to them is always the same..."I don't want to ruin my hair!"
In the last 6 months I think I've flat ironed my hair only twice but it was for my own reasons. I wanted to see how long it was before it curled up :)