"You should brush your hair"

[Anywhere]

After gym class today I recieved a comment from a friend of mine. "Why aren't you brushing your hair? It gets so tangled after gym class."
I braid my hair before gym, so it doesn't get tangled. When I told her I don't brush my hair anyway, another girl thought it'd be great to put in her two cents. "You never brush your hair?"
My friend responded: "Yeah she never does, watch this" and raked her fingers through my hair, which made it tangle, which meant she ended up tugging my whole head downward.
"Thats so gross! You should brush it at least twice a day."
"Really, that is disgusting."

I tried explaining that since my hair isn't naturally straight (Both of them have pin straight hair) brushing makes it bushy and unappealing, but they were too busy being concerned over how "unhygienic" my non-brushed hair was. (good thing they don't know the rest of my haircare routine, they'd probably have a heart attack :p)

People are so frustrating somtimes. :justy:

but on the bright side, my psych. teacher was handing back tests and noted "wow, your hair has really gotten long!" It sounded more like an amazed statement, not a disgusted one, so I took it as a compliment. :wink:

[Sara Smile]

Your hair is so pretty in your signature. Those girls are crazy (and I have straight hair). :)

[Heidi_234]

Annoying. I feel your frustration. You could've told you only brush it in the shower, when it's wet, or something of a kind. I was asked once how do I henna, and I felt weird enough to explain how I make the muddy stuff and then slather it on my hair with my hands. It takes an LHCer to understand an LHCer. :lol:

[Calista]

My friend responded: "Yeah she never does, watch this" and raked her fingers through my hair, which made it tangle, which meant she ended up tugging my whole head downward.

Not much of a friend, is she? :?

[Ravenwaves 88]

I would be so angry at anyone....lket alone a friend making an example out of my hair and assulting it like that. My first thought was face punch! I usually just think those things and never do them but I would not speak to my friend for awhile after that.

[Dreams_in_Pink]

i would've beat the hell out of them the second she touched my hair! you're way too good!

[Othala]

She raked her fingers through your hair! Wow.

I would have removed her hand from my hair and told her not to touch my body. Possibly something stronger.

[Stormcast]

Wow! I agree with the others, i would have slapped her hand away...ugh the way people act sometimes...Sorry that had to happen to you D:

[Aquamarine]

Oh..just ignore them:)

[Aquamarine]

It takes an LHCer to understand an LHCer. :lol:Yep! I totally agree:)

[Copasetic]

Ugh, I hate unsolicited hair advice. I used to have a co-worker who would constantly be telling me that everything I was doing to my hair was horrible for it. It was so annoying!

[enfys]

I'd hit the roof if she'd have touched my hair like that. No-one except my parents or DH touch my hair mre than once. They soon learn!

I thought it was common knowledge that wavy/curly hair can be much better off being combed. It won't ever look like straight hair through brushed alone.

I don't think you need to brush it, from your siggy pic :flower:

[Hiriel]

People. They're weird. And not always (or even often) in a good way. I don't get how not brushing your hair is unhygienic. Oh well.

[Merewen]

Yeah, I feel ya... one of my future inlaws gave me a hairbrush this Christmas. :rolleyes: Think they heard from my fiance about how nobody can sing the "where is my hairbrush" song from VeggieTales to me anymore.

In most instances I don't tell people I don't brush my hair. I just tell them I comb it.

They don't have to know that even that is only once a week when I shower.

[HisForever]

Wow, sorry your friend was so rude. Ive never had anyone say something to me like that, even in high school when my hair was longer. My hair is wavy, and I would only comb in the morning after a shower, put mousse in it, let it be, then brush it out at night. Im still doing this now as my hair is growing, but if I wear it straight I try to tame it by brushing :) Hope your friend realizes how hurtful that was to you.

[verene]

Wow! Those girls sound quite rude, especially the one who just ran her fingers through your hair.

Not brushing your hair after gym is not weird. I didn't brush my hair after gym, weights, marching band, or tennis. If it's in a contained style it doesn't need it.

[Fairlight63]

Boy, those girls are so rude! I think that they are just jealous of your beautiful hair! Girls can be so mean sometimes!
I would just ignore them.

[curlylocks85]

After gym class today I recieved a comment from a friend of mine. "Why aren't you brushing your hair? It gets so tangled after gym class."
I braid my hair before gym, so it doesn't get tangled. When I told her I don't brush my hair anyway, another girl thought it'd be great to put in her two cents. "You never brush your hair?"
My friend responded: "Yeah she never does, watch this" and raked her fingers through my hair, which made it tangle, which meant she ended up tugging my whole head downward.
"Thats so gross! You should brush it at least twice a day."
"Really, that is disgusting."

What is so unhygienic about not brushing your hair X amount of times per day? I could see this being true if you never washed your hair, but seriously, I do not see the connection. Your hair is gorgeous. You should let your friend know that when it comes to your personal care, it is none of her business.

[chipzahoy]

Rude, much? And brushing doesn't clean your hair so I don't see the hygiene issue.

[Sammich]

Ughh. Poor you, how freakin' rude. I feel for you! That's why I never say anything when someone says: "You should brush your hair." ._. I know they're going to say something about it being weird. Just ignore them, they're ignorant.

I'd be upset to tears because of that, thank God you're not like that! Lol! :p
By the way, those friends do not sound like real friends. Real friends may question actions, but will listen to your reasoning, similar to my best friend. She's interested in my own conditioning treatment now! :p Same with my sister in law. Lmao!

[twolunarspring]

How amazingly rude! You don't have to let people speak to you that way.

[MicheleClaire]

The unsolicited opinion of 16 year old girls... -shudder-

[Witchy]

I tried explaining that since my hair isn't naturally straight (Both of them have pin straight hair) brushing makes it bushy and unappealing, but they were too busy being concerned over how "unhygienic" my non-brushed hair was.
Remember, these are the same people who think you need to use sulfate shampoo because "oil is bad for you hair", depend on coney conditioners because their hair is too fried to be smooth and slick on its own, brush wet hair because it "gets longer", blow dry it til its bone dry, can't tell the difference between frizz and split ends, and cake on the hair spray because theirs no other way to keep their hair behaved. And now they evidently think a hair hygiene tests means raking your hands through curly hair.

Very surreal. Like that Twilight Zone episode (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Eye_of_the_Beholder) where all of the doctors and townspeople look like monsters and comment on the ugliness of a beautiful woman.

Hopefully something like this doesn't is an isolated event and doesn't result in being outcast at school. But at the very least, the next time someone tears through your hair, stop them.

[Medievalmaniac]

Why is it OK for her to just grab your hair like that? You should be firm: "Do not touch my hair again without my permission. You have no right to put your hands on me in an unsolicited and hostile fashion, and if you do it again, I'll report you for bullying." Then, DO IT. We put up with too much crap from other people. You have a right to be unmolested by others at school. You have a right to expect personal boundaries to be respected. If they are not, you have the right to seek redress for it, and I think it is high time we in this country started taking back our right to basic, human decency and respect from others. I have absolutely had it with the rudeness! Stage a respect intervention, that's my recommendation. If she's going to speak to you like that anyway, you aren't losing anything by standing up for your rights.

[Medievalmaniac]

The unsolicited opinion of 16 year old girls... -shudder-

This made me lol! And, for the record, I completely agree. No offense to mature, responsible, kindhearted 16 year old girls, as I'm certain there are many right here in the LHC...but the vast majority I have run across lately in real life do not fit that category, alas.:rolleyes:

[FrannyG]

Honestly, I have gotten to the point where I believe that the only people who understand us are right here at LHC. That's why I love this place.

I don't share my hair methods with anyone in real life. I learned my lesson quickly after joining here. :)

[Newniepg]

I agree with the posters who commented on the rudeness of your 'friend' in grabbing your hair. I think I would feel betrayed in that situation.

That said, you seem to have yor head screwed on properly and know how to treat YOUR hair. It's not theirs so they don't understand. Your hair looks lovely in your signature, I think you should keep not doing what ever it is you don't do and enjoy lovely hair!

[pepperminttea]

Not much of a friend, is she? :?

This. I can't believe she'd make an example of you like that, for something as personal and subjective as hair. :confused: I'm only on the straighter-end of waviness myself, and if I brush I turn into a lion, so I can only imagine how much better your curls must look without brushing. Going by your siggy, your hair is stunning. :flower:

[Sammich]

The unsolicited opinion of 16 year old girls... -shudder-

Ouch. :( But it's fine, I completely agree. :p Most 16 year old girls are ick, only found one I like so far! ;)

[RachelRain]

I would have slapped her hand away, or reached over if I was too slow to slap her and yanked her own hair back. I never did like people touching my hair.

if they say anything later, just say you comb it and there's a difference between the two or something.

[MonaMayfair]

There are an awful lot of ignorant people around who speak with absolute authority on subjects about which they know nothing whatever!
They're usually the sort who give unsolicited advice too...

[zombi]

i would've beat the hell out of them the second she touched my hair! you're way too good!
Oh, I KNOW. I hate for people to touch my hair!

I don't know why people think it's acceptable to just TOUCH people's HAIR. That is something so intimate to me. Ugh.

[Kome]

BRATS! I'd have slapped my friend for touching my hair. HAHA... just kidding... sort of. >.>

[triumphator!]

Isn't that the way life is when you're in school. Everyone is entitled to an opinion, and you're gonna hear it! Just rest easy knowing they're breaking and damaging their hair with all kinds of crazy chemicals and heat tools, while you're babying yours into spun gold.

[spidermom]

Did you tell them that you use a comb instead of a brush? They might have been assuming that you don't groom your hair at all, which admittedly isn't any of their business, but that's teenagers for you. They know everything. Anyway, personal grooming = hygiene in many minds.

This idea that nobody has the right to touch your hair isn't universal. I was at a party last night when my bun went wonky on me, so I pulled out the stick. A woman I had met for the first time only an hour or so before came up to me and buried both of her hands in my hair. I didn't mind because she was saying complimentary things about it, but it did bring to mind all the "horror stories" I have heard on here about how "everybody should know" that hair is a personal part of your body and should not be touched without permission. Obviously this isn't the cultural norm; not everybody knows.

[Ruvie]

Not much of a friend, is she? :?
my thoughts exactly!!!

[little_cherry]

"Yeah she never does, watch this" and raked her fingers through my hair, which made it tangle, which meant she ended up tugging my whole head downward.
"Thats so gross! You should brush it at least twice a day."
"Really, that is disgusting."
That's awful. I agree with Calista...she doesn't sound like much of a friend if she's willing to down you like that in front of others.

I wonder what she does to her hair....??

[itheleniel]

Your hair is amazing! I wish I had curly hair. don't listen to them. They can't possibly understand curly hair (what with their pin straight hair). Not to mention they should yank your hair. Jeez they aren't good friends...are you sure they are friends? Thumbs up to your teacher.:)

[Quixii]

My sister keeps doing that. She has very straight hair (maybe 1b?), and we keep trying to drill into her that she really needs to comb or brush her hair. After years and years of trying, she's actually been doing it! But now she keeps turning to my hair and trying to run the brush through it - "You need to brush your hair too!" I keep telling her, no I don't, because it's curly and brushing makes it worse. I brush it before my showers.

[kwaniesiam]

If they think unbrushed hair is unhygenic, I wonder what they think of dreadlocks :ponder: :rolleyes:

Brush your hair just once in front of them and show them the poof, that'll get them to shut up.

[Chamomile betty]

Well that was rather rude however it was balanced by a nice compliment. I don't brush my hair either and my hair is the better for it. I use a widetooth comb.

[Coffeebug]

They're just jealous cos your hair is awesome and theirs is probably all snappy and they're not bright enough to figure out why.

[Kathie]

Thats horrible!

I agree with what others have said in this thread- sounds like jealousy to me.

And, how is not brushing your hair unhygienic? Id argue the opposite actually ‘let’s take a brush with old hair and oil intertwined in it and run it through our clean hair’. I’m not opposed to brushing at all- I’m just opposed to the comment that not brushing is unhygienic.

I’m with you- I never brush and only comb for the scalp massaging aspect of it.

[ibleedlipstick]

Did you tell them that you use a comb instead of a brush? They might have been assuming that you don't groom your hair at all, which admittedly isn't any of their business, but that's teenagers for you. They know everything. Anyway, personal grooming = hygiene in many minds.

This idea that nobody has the right to touch your hair isn't universal. I was at a party last night when my bun went wonky on me, so I pulled out the stick. A woman I had met for the first time only an hour or so before came up to me and buried both of her hands in my hair. I didn't mind because she was saying complimentary things about it, but it did bring to mind all the "horror stories" I have heard on here about how "everybody should know" that hair is a personal part of your body and should not be touched without permission. Obviously this isn't the cultural norm; not everybody knows.

Yes. I agree completely. Sometimes, I think we tend to assume that because WE feel this way, everyone feels like it. Personally, I have no problem with my hair being touched- If the person is gentle, I love it. But I HATE having my stomach touched- and yet I have friends who have no issue with it. I think it depends on the person.

Anyway, I think that your "friend" was rude- her actions were not remotely friendly.

[florenonite]

I'd have told them that I don't need to brush my hair to keep it clean because I wash it regularly ;)

[christine1989]

I totally understand where you are coming from. Sometimes straight haired people just don't understand what brushing can do to curly/wavy hair. If they had curly hair for a day I think they would understand much better.

[ArienEllariel]

I honestly didn't understand that brushing=frizzy, hard to manage hair for many waveys/curlies until recently. I think it's terrible that your friend put you down like that in public. She had no business doing what she did, period. I would never do that to a friend. Perhapse she's not a true friend? (though this could just be an isolated incident). I would have been livid if someone did that to me- and it takes a lot to get me angry.

[Quezie]

Remember, these are the same people who think you need to use sulfate shampoo because "oil is bad for you hair", depend on coney conditioners because their hair is too fried to be smooth and slick on its own, brush wet hair because it "gets longer", blow dry it til its bone dry, can't tell the difference between frizz and split ends, and cake on the hair spray because theirs no other way to keep their hair behaved. And now they evidently think a hair hygiene tests means raking your hands through curly hair.

Very surreal. Like that Twilight Zone episode (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Eye_of_the_Beholder) where all of the doctors and townspeople look like monsters and comment on the ugliness of a beautiful woman.

Hopefully something like this doesn't is an isolated event and doesn't result in being outcast at school. But at the very least, the next time someone tears through your hair, stop them.

This made me laugh, because it's sooo true. I have given up on talking to others about hair care outside of this forum. People really do believe what they hear on commercials about products "healing" their damaged hair.

[IcarusBride]

Wow! That's horrible.
Perhaps next time you could say "I don't use brushes on my hair" rather than "I don't brush my hair" ? To many girls, 'brush' 'comb' and 'detangle' are all synonamous, and when you say you don't, they will get the idea that your hair is a total rat's nest, which isn't the case! I hope your friends grown up to be more sympathetic, open-minded people.

[SlightlySoprano]

Wow. Some friend, huh. I'm sorry :grouphug: