Please HELP Me.....So depressed - Hair looks terrible and won't grow back!

[littlebitl]

Hi. Two years ago, I was getting highlights, blowdrying, flat ironing, etc. Then, during a highlight in June 2006, she put too much bleach and it literally Ate off my bangs. Six months later, I went back to my natural color and got my hair chi permanently straightened. My hair began literally melting off. In January ’07, I had it cut really short and he cut it into choppy crappy layers. It was BAD. In the summer of last year, I wore extensions in just the sides for 2 months (Great Lengths). Now, almost 2 years later, my hair is still bad (maybe even worse). I have the worst hair in the world, and I feel like a monster. I’ve tried Rogaine, all kinds of vitamins, two endos, 2 regular doctors, 4 derms. I’ve tried CO but it leaves my hair looking even thinner. Even after blowdrying out – weighs my hair down- And, since my hair is still so short and choppy I have to blow dry right now until it gets longer (if that ever happens). I was using medium heat but now it takes high heat to get it to fluff and dry and look half-way normal. I use a 1200 watt dryer, though. Some days, I get so frustrated trying to get it to look normal that I rewet and try again. I cry when I look in the mirror or see pictures of myself because I used to look good. (well, human)….I’m on antidepressants, B12, multivitamin, and armour thyroid. My thyroid levels are normal but low normal, and I’ve had some weight gain around the middle and no energy (probably from the depression from this hair though). So my doc thinks I have mild hypothyroidism. I feel like I can’t be myself anymore because of this hair thinning and texture change. I’ve tried SLS free and shampoo bars but they are all drying and don’t rinse (make my hair feel hard). I guess because it’s so thin and porous. I’m the saddest person in the world right now. I used to have okay hair and nothing I try (and I’ve spent LOTS of money on this) seems to be helping it come back. I ordered some HF37 vitamins and some kind of hair loss shampoo that starts with “o” – can’t remember name of it but is being praised on the boards for increased hair growth. I wanted to try to get this mess to grow out but it is turning to just fuzz instead. It has potential because one day will look good then for 2 weeks will look like peach fuzz. That’s why some days I say to hell with it and fix it twice trying to figure out what to do. I cry all the time. I don’t know what shampoo and conditioner to use. I don’t know what products to use. I have to use hairspray but even that doesn’t hold well. I’m so incredibly sad and I’ve already started over once – don’t want to again. Please give me suggestions. Thanks so much. I considered the Castille shampoo but heard it can make your hair gummy. I tried AMLA/SHIKAIKAI/REETHA mixture with water yesterday and would not rinse well and took 3 shampoos to get that mess out of my hair. I color with the 28 day hair colors every so often myself because don’t trust salons. Can I use henna or would it just eat what’s left of my bad hair off???? I will try to add pictures. Please don’t laugh or make fun. I’m so sad.


Jan

[girlcat36]

Oh, Jan....
I would never laugh or make fun! I am very sad about my hair as well, but it's getting better.
What type of hair do you have? Have you tried scalp massage? This really helped me. Are you low on iron by any chance, and do you eat enough protein? You probably know that you need to quit the heat styling or the coloring. I think both is too much on your hair. Have you tried oils on your hair? As far as shampoos go, I don't have much advice because I am still trying to figure out what my hair likes. Try and get a picture up!:blossom:

[littlebitl]

http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb18/littlebitl/016.jpg Was crying

http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb18/littlebitl/027.jpg a better day (rare but still bad)

http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb18/littlebitl/preextensions.jpg when it was all cut off a year ago

http://i204.photobucket.com/albums/bb18/littlebitl/me6-1.jpg what it used to look like

[spidermom]

Is this for real? You have got to stop doing things to your hair! Don't color it. Don't heat style it. Wash it with a very gentle shampoo diluted with a little water. Perhaps use a little aloe vera gel on your fingers. Run your fingers through your hair, let it air dry, and call it good.

Seriously. The less you do to your scalp and hair, the better chance it will have to recover. If you really can't stand how it looks, make friends with scarves and hats and maybe even a wig or two. Put a nice oil treatment on your hair and scalp and cover it up. I know a woman who almost destroyed her hair with bleaching and dyeing - changing the color every other month or so. She ended up using olive oil on what was left of her hair under a wig or hat for about six months before she finally felt her hair was acceptable to be seen. It worked!

No more chemicals. No more heat.

[littlebitl]

Today it's worse than any of those since yesterday I tried the amla/reetha/shikaikai....seemed to dry out my hair worse and make it total fuzz. It's so thin and fuzzy. I took a picture of myself today and was going to add it to this but my husband got mad at me for being so obsessed with this and threw the calmera and broke it. I have no support in this other than the wonderful girls at hairlosshelp.com. Has anyone ever used castile soap or castile soap bars???

[littlebitl]

Should I use a conditioner???

[amaiaisabella]

It really doesn't look that bad, honest!

Perhaps some deep treatments, and then clarify a lot? I'm not familiar with clarifying but plenty of other members are, and can give you lots of info. You can definitely do some homemade protein treatments with egg, honey, and other things, or you can buy some at the beauty store. There's a natural Henna and Placenta packet available at drugstores, or you can get the Ion Restoration packets at Sally's (if you are in the U.S.)

Good luck and remember, people here understand your pain!

[krt1013]

I'm not very experienced, so others may come and correct me, but I think that you need to stop coloring, period. Lay off heat stying and if your hair is truly chemically damaged (i.e. gummy and weak), do a protein treatment like Nexxus Emergencee and then deep condition with heat.

If you hair is just dry, or so brittle that it snaps with little pressure, moisturize the heck out of it. Only use super gentle shampoos (my favorite is Jessicurl Hair Cleansing Cream, jessicurl.com or curlmart.com) and slather on cone and protein-free conditioners like Jessicurl Too Shea, Aubrey Organics Honeysuckle Rose, and even the Vo5 88 cent conditioners like Chamomile Tea, Vitaburst, and Nourishing Pomegranate.

I also recommend doing weekly deep conditionings, where you use a thick, cone- and protein-free conditioner like the Jessicurl or AO Honesuckle Rose with heat. Put the conditioner in your hair, wrap it up in a towel or cap, and then either put a warm pad on your head or use a blowdryer. There are also specific heat caps for this.

Hope this helps! Please, please stop dying your hair and heat styling for now and try what I've said or listen to others who may be more enlightened!

Good luck, and happy growing :)... you can get through this, I promise! Hair grows back, even if it takes ages!

[lora410]

Well you can always do the drastic buzz cut like some have to start over or you can really start taking care of your hair and pamper it. High blow drying is going to do nothing more then make your hair much drier then it already is which leads to hair breaking off and you don't gain any length. Also hair dye will probably have to go as well. Henna would be a great alternative because it strengthens your hair.You cal also try deep oiling with olive oil and some LIGHT heat like a warmed up towel for a few hrs. Right now it needs moisture because it is so badly damaged and all the chemicals and heat DO affect your hair follicles.HTH :flower:

[AutumnLeaves]

Oh my! I hate to see you cry; you are quite lovely. I am not a doctor but I do know that sometimes health issues or medicines can cause hair loss. Genetics also plays a factor.

I wish I could give you advice and I will try. Of course, you do have to do what is most comfortable for you. Sometimes the chemicals from coloring and straightening or bleaching (as you sadly discovered) can wreak havoc on our hair. Same with direct heat from dryers. We all have different hair types and some hair can withstand more than others. I can only tell you what I would do...and that is to lay off all coloring, all chemicals, and all heat on your hair. If your hair is naturally curly, you might try just using a serum for curlies and just wash, condition, and scrunch. If this helps your hair, it is worth it to let go of the other stuff.

You are so cute; I hope you won't let this continue to make you cry. Sometimes just leaving it alone for awhile helps alot. Others may have more advice.

Please don't cry; you are just so pretty. I hope that doctors can help figure out the problem and get you on the road to recovery. I wish you all the best and send you big hugs.

[Fee]

Hi, I justed wanted to tell you that I know how you feel. My hair was in very bad condition about 4 years ago...I had shoulder length hair and I permed it curly and had layers and then about 7months after the perm (did I mention I was using terrible dye chemicals on it?) my hair grew and half of my hair was straight (1A) the rest the curly (now wavy) perm..after 1 year I finally cut the perm off and then had like 17"..my hair was a ruin..terrible..now..3.5 years later after taking good care of my hair and joining here I have almost hip length hair! I still get a bit low because it's thin,but I'm growing out a mohawk cut..but I'm still not letting it get me down..it takes time to improve the state of your hair,you should read here the lovely advice of these wonderful ladies and gentlemen,because they know what they are talking about.I just thought I would give you hope that it's not the end of the world and the state of your hair can improve! hope that helps,don't give up and good luck! oh and,don't worry! it's just hair in the end,and I think it doesn't look that bad on the pics.


edit: I still color my hair,I use L'oreal Garnier Creme Gloss and it's wonderful...also condition a lot and coconut oil helped me loads.

[littlebitl]

Thanks guys. What do you think about my doing a cassia/colorless henna treatment to jumpstart this? I will definitely stop coloring but am prematurely graying, so do you think I should try henna and if not now, how long?? I can't make myself do the wig/hat thing yet, but I can't totally drop the hairdryer yet either. I wouldn't look human. I can do the medium heat when it's almost dry for now but I WILL stop coloring and the aloe vera is a great idea. Thanks. Thanks for the shampoo conditioner ideas too. I need something very gentle (shmpoo and conditioner both that are gentle).

Jan

[Sillage]

No, I wouldn't do anything other than gentle shampoo, rich conditioner, and maybe a leave in.

[krt1013]

I promise that you will still "look human" if you don't blowdry, sweetie.

Read my post on this page of the hair epiphanies:

http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=3867&page=2

I used to have horrible hair. It was dry, frizzy, and I heat styled just like you did in order to feel 'normal.'

The problem was, everything I did to look 'normal' made me look worse in the long run!

I really recommend protein, then henna, then ABSOLUTELY no heat or chemicals or silicones (found in poos and dishes with endings like -icone -icane, -one, -ane)

You may feel like your hair is flat or lifeless without heat, but trust me, it will start to look better after just a few days.

[Kelpie]

I am sad that you are feeling this way. It sounds like you are in a bit of a viscious circle. You are unhappy and depressed because you don't think your hair looks good and your hair is probably not growing well because you are depressed. I can't recommend any products or fixes for you because I don't know enough.
All I can suggest is that you try and forget about your hair. I know this might not be what you want to hear and it definetly isn't easy. Perhaps simplifying your routine would help and just trying to leave your hair alone.
Sorry if this doesn't seem all that helpful but it what I think could do you good.

[littlebitl]

What kind of protein and henna do you recommend? The powdered stuff (amla, reetha, shikakai) did nothing but make my hair dryer.

Jan

[littlebitl]

I found a pure olive oil soap bar by Kiss my Face in health food store today. It has Saponified olive oil, water, and sodiumchloride. Would that be gentle enough for hair or not?

Jan

[krt1013]

What kind of protein and henna do you recommend? The powdered stuff (amla, reetha, shikakai) did nothing but make my hair dryer.

Jan
Well, if you've already tried henna and it made your hair drier, then I don't recommend you do it again. the LHC Henna board has loads of great recs, but I honestly take back my first henna recommendation. No color. Just lots of moisture, and oil your hair at night.

Protein is optional -- does your hair snap with little pulling or is it mushy/stretchy breakable?

If it's super brittle, load up on the moisture. If it breaks because it is weak and stretchy, do a protein treatment, but no more than 1X a month (and keep piling on the conditioner between).

Hope this helps.

[BrianaFineHair]

Have you ever tried overnight oil treatments? (olive oil, coconut)

Shampoo - no SLS. I recommend Burt's Bees, but put half in a bottle for later and use the other half watered down.

Conditioner - have you ever tried using just a vingegar rinse? (10% vinegar/90% water ratio)
This should balance the ph in your hair/scalp The smell goes away - don't worry about that.

I thought the one suggestion about using a serum leave in gel to scrunch up your curls is a really good idea! Do you have natural curl or wave?

Headband - I love using the small skinny head bands. Just wash, leave in that gel, and put in the head band - then walk away from the mirror.

You've got such a pretty face. :) Consider the advice given; try some of these out. Let us know how things are going.

[spidermom]

You are a pretty woman, and I am sure your hair will be fine with no blow-drying. Try it when you have nowhere to go. You probably just need to get used to how it looks. Look at my hair. I used to think that it had to be straight to be pretty. How wrong I was! If you absolutely MUST blow-dry, use the coolest setting. It will still work but will take a little longer.

No - don't do cassia or henna or anything else other than very gentle shampoo right now. I don't think you even need conditioner at your length.

You could use the soap bar if you have soft water. If you have hard water, it won't rinse cleanly and will leave you with soap scum - a very limp, dull, and unattractive look. Same with castile soaps, only double.

The night or at least an hour or so before you wash, massage some olive oil into your hair and scalp, then cover with a shower cap, and cover that with a knit cap (to hold in heat). Actually you could use any vegetable/fruit oil as long as it is cold pressed or expeller expressed. If it is, it will be right on the label, except for imported olive oil, which more than likely will be cold pressed. When oil is extracted with heat, it changes the size of the molecules, which will prevent your hair from absorbing it in most cases.

[spidermom]

Shampoo - no SLS. I recommend Burt's Bees, but put half in a bottle for later and use the other half watered down.


This is a really good suggestion, except that I know I would be very uncomfortable with cold shampoo solution running down my neck. I keep an empty shampoo bottle in the bathroom and mix my squirt of shampoo with warm water every time because it is runny, and it will go down your neck and back. It feels better warm.

[eadwine]

Oh my.. slow down on what you are doing to the hair honey! No treatments no nothing. Just a gentle shampoo and condish, and maybe a bit of oil. That should be it.

Trying all these various things one after another isn't helping. Listen to Spidermom :)

[Mrs_Zombie]

YES!! Always listen to Spidermom, she is a genius and totally rocks!!

:BOWS to worship Spidermom:

[squiggyflop]

I found a pure olive oil soap bar by Kiss my Face in health food store today. It has Saponified olive oil, water, and sodiumchloride. Would that be gentle enough for hair or not?

Jan
ive used a kiss my face olive oil bar on my hair before and had better results with it than burts bees baby shampoo bar... it made my hair look thicker.. but it felt all weird and thick so i stopped... dont forget the vinegar rinse! i think it might be good for you since you want your hair to look thicker...

[littlebitl]

I've tried the vinegar rinse before and it made my hair feel so hard and matted and like it was going to all snap of when rinsing it and all tangled. My hair is so thin and so porous. I've had our water tested. It's well water and we moved here 2 years ago. Could the water have something to do with it even though it tested okay? Soap/shampoo bars and SLS free shampoos do the same thing - make my hair feel dried out and gummy even when wet and won't rinse. ????????

[BrianaFineHair]

This is a really good suggestion, except that I know I would be very uncomfortable with cold shampoo solution running down my neck. I keep an empty shampoo bottle in the bathroom and mix my squirt of shampoo with warm water every time because it is runny, and it will go down your neck and back. It feels better warm.

I have not noticed any coldness from the extra water added though. I'm going to be more aware of it next time I wash my hair though :p ;)

[littlebitl]

And, do I dilute the conditioner? I have burt's bees - volumizing shampoo and conditioner - never tried and will try next wash with diluting the shampoo and conditioner too? Scared to try the vinegar rinse again. Will try the aloe gel with the burt's bees. I work in a rehab and have to look halfway presentable each day and am so scared and feel so helpless. What vitamins do you guys recommend? The FH37??

[littlebitl]

Sorry to be so full of questions....What about the aloe gel? Will it harden in my hair and make it look wet and crunchy???

[krt1013]

I've tried the vinegar rinse before and it made my hair feel so hard and matted and like it was going to all snap of when rinsing it and all tangled. My hair is so thin and so porous. I've had our water tested. It's well water and we moved here 2 years ago. Could the water have something to do with it even though it tested okay? Soap/shampoo bars and SLS free shampoos do the same thing - make my hair feel dried out and gummy even when wet and won't rinse. ????????
How often do you shampoo? I say listen to spidermom (but I know I can't live without conditioner). Avoid anything that has ever made your hair dry in the past.

I also think that if your hair feels gummy, you need to use a protein treatment. Someone correct me if I'm wrong, but Emergencee saved my life when I started to grow my hair more healthily. Just don't use it more than once a month.

[krt1013]

Sorry to be so full of questions....What about the aloe gel? Will it harden in my hair and make it look wet and crunchy???
In my experience, aloe gel makes damaged hair look frizzy (because it is a humectant, i.e. attracts water) but works wonders for healthy hair. You should stop focusing on styling product and more on how you treat your hair to begin with.

And yes, it is a good idea to dilute shampoo, but not so good to dilute conditioner unless you put it in a spray bottle to be used as a leave-in.

[Melisande]

Jan, you look lovely. Really pretty. Your hair looks much better than you described. Of course you compare it in your head to the hair you had before your hair disasters. But nobody else does. And wherever I look, I see people with hair that looks worse than yours, often on purpose. So relax. It's all a matter of taste, and who judges you anyway? You look fine. Your hair will look better, but it's not half as bad as you described it.

I see you got wonderful advice here.

Slow down. Hair takes time. It takes time to grow. Baby it. You can't expect a newborn to read and ride a bike. So don't expect your new growth to come to your shoulders in thick and cascading waves! Nourish it, pamper it, and its time will come.

So don't do anything but diluted shampoo and conditioner, the gentlest you can find. You have to break the circle of heat styling, you tried it and you saw: in the long run, it makes the hair look worse. So stop it. You can. It will make your new hair so much healthier and stronger.

I'm not an expert here like others are but I found scalp massages with jojoba oil very beneficial.

If you want healthy hair in the future, you have to change the way you want to look every day. You will have to put up with looking less put together than you are used. The idea with the aloe vera gel is good. (Read the above now and it sounds logical - so it's probably not such a good idea, krt is right, focus on care, not styling.)

Aren't you a bit cruel to yourself and your hair when you judge it as "not human"? Your hair is human also when it's air dried. I wish you could see yourself like others see you. Read it again, please!

You will discover the beauty of air dried hair, and with every inch you grow, it will be easier because the hair's weight will help.

Please, take photos and keep a journal.

It will be wonderful to compare the pictures next year. Believe me, we will all be there to celebrate your achievements. I'm sure they'll come. I've been long enough around here to begin believing in miracles :-)

[spidermom]

Some people like aloe vera gel a lot (me), some hate it. Wet your hands first and then try about 1/4 to 1/2 teaspoon the first time, rub it between hands and then through hair. Try not to touch your hair after that. It's kind of like a setting gel, too. It will keep your hair in place, but it shouldn't be too stiff. Use this instead of hair spray.

I don't like vinegar rinses very much as they make my hair very fly-away. Each hair takes off on its own toward the sky.

As far as conditioner -- no, don't dilute it. Use about a dime-size amount, again rubbed between hands, then through hair. Rinse well. You don't want any residue left behind to make your hair limp.

P.S. - you should print out Melisande's post, keep it with you, and read it often. It is so very wise and kind. It's not about me, but even I feel better from reading it.

[krt1013]

Beautiful, Melisande! I agree completely.

[citcit]

I want to shout: stop!
You have to decide between healthy hair or good looking hair for a day. At this moment you can't have both. If you want to have good looking hair for a day then you need nothing to change, use every product you know and go mad at the next day. But if you real want to have healthy hair stop using all that stuff. Try to wash you hair once/twice a week, only comb it for styling, nothing more. Try to ignore your hair styling. Give your hair some time and it will thank you with a greater look after a few months. Forget your hair images from the past, your hair was chemical treated.

[littlebitl]

Thank yall so much. I've been shut up in my bedroom away from my family all day. Around Easter and after it was doing a little better like the pics, but I promise this past week it has no curl and is just a halo of unshaped fuzz. I'm so sad that even in thse pics I looked bettr than tdy. I want to just curl up and disappear! Thnks for yalls help.

Jan

[Hayat]

Oh dearest littlebitl, I just know so very well how you feel! I've been like this myself, standing in front of the mirror crying my eyes off. I used to have such nice, thick and shiny hair when I was younger, but all of a sudden my hair felt like straw. I was shedding terribly, there was no shine, no life - just really flat, dead straws hanging down from my scalp.

Please, take a deep breath, wipe your tears, and be certain that there is always hope! Today, my hair is getting back to its normal self again. Shine and bounce are back. Even my lovely waves are starting to come back. I started all over only a month and a half ago, and got it cut from about BSL to chin lenght. My hair was totally damaged from years with chemical dying!

-----

I'll tell you short what I've been doing. Perhaps there is something for you to pick up.

1. I went to a "nature therapist" (don't quite know what this is called in English), and got my hair analyzed. She found I was lacking calcium, and also that I was suffering from aluminum poisoning. Vitamins and minerals are good, but it will not help you if you do not take the vitamins and minerals that are the right ones for you. As for me, the vitamins was of little help because I was lacking calcium. Vitamins and Minerals work together, and it could be very useful to find the exact stuff for your body. About the aluminum, I did a cleaning process to get it out, and as it probably came from my deodorant, I stopped using it (most deodorants contain aluminum). I got a so called "crystal stick" at the health food store instead, and it is great!

2. I stopped dying my hair chemically, and promised myself to never ever do it again. Neither this, or any other chemical treatment such as a perm etc.

3. I clearified my hair with BS/ACV. Then, I washed my hair approx. once a week - no more. Tried CO for a month. Did not work. Tried CWC for another month, a little better but still not good enough. Then tried to wash with SMT. WOW! That stuff is GREAT for my hair! I've also had a period with shampoo bars, but I'm not so satisfied, so no I'm back to SMT.

4. I did not do anything but the stuff above. I did not blow dry, did not try anything else. Just left my hair to rest for a week, then washed. Then rested for another week etc. I hardly brushed it, just very carefully combed with a wide tooth comb. I never styled, never used any spray, mousse, hair gel or wax. Nothing! When it looked too bad, I put it in a ponytail, or I wore a hat.

5. After a while, I went on to hennadigo. This stuff is GREAT! All the greys gone, and an incredible refreshment of my own medium brown colour. In addition, I believe henna is strengthening my hair and making it thicker, softer and more shiny.

6. As for shedding, growth and scalp care I really want to try Moonchaser's scalp oil - but as I'm pregnant right now I want to wait until baby is born.

7. I learnt how to use the snap-test to find out if your hair lacks of protein or moisture. Mine is lacking of moisture, so then I:

8. Got a jar of Extra Virgin Coconut Oil. Put a small amount in ends when hair is still wet after washing. WOW! This did the trick for me, and that is when my bounce really came back!

-------------

As the other people say here: DO NOT overload your hair, and DO NOT try everything at once. Take one step at a time, slowly - take notes of what you do, do the snap-test, and maybe also have your hair checked for vitamines/minerals you may lack. Leave your hair to rest as much as possible. Do not use any styling products, and do not blow dry.

Then get yourself a nice head scarf, a nice hat or something cool to cover up your bad hair days! It will be better. If my hair could be so much better, then yours can as well!

:grouphug:

[Hayat]

Melisande: :applause

[Nevermore]

Honestly, in your case, I would get my hair cut in a pixie (or as short as you can tolerate) and get a wig. Settle on a routine (water only maybe) and wear the wig when you go out. Your hair will not get any better, it will in fact get worse, the more you mess with it. The wig will let you grow out healthy hair while not feeling horrible and as long as you only wear it when you're outside the house, it probably won't do any damage.

I'd stop the blowdrying, unless you get a room temp/cool air dryer, it's pretty bad for hair in general, even tough hair.

I hope your hair grows back and looks good for you soon :)

[salamander]

First, I think you look fine. You don't have the best hair in the world, but it's nothing that would frighten small children in the street, and it doesn't ruin your overall appearance. I know how easy it is to get fixated on your own flaws and magnify them until you can't stand to look in a mirror, but honestly, you look fine to other people!

I think switching from chemical color to henna would be a good idea. Chemical color damages hair, and henna protects it and improves it. Henna's a bit more trouble, but it really is beneficial, and there are ways to do it without drying out your hair. There are ways of doing it that don't dry your hair out. Don't use acid, do use yogurt or chamomile tea or something like that in your mix. You use it whenever your roots have grown out; it's permanent hair dye, and the conditioning effects come from the dye molecules. Spend some time in the herbal hair care forum here, read the henna thread, look at Henna for Hair (http://www.hennaforhair.com/).

You definitely need moisture. SMT's (Snowy's Moisture Treatment), which are a honey, conditioner, and pure aloe gel mix, might be a nice, light treatment for you. Trying protein is a good idea, but if your hair doesn't need protein treatments they can make dryness worse, so don't fling yourself into it, try one and see if things get better or worse.

Why don't you try leaving it alone on weekends, when you don't have to go to work? Two days with no shampooing or blowdrying or anything. It could improve the condition of your hair, and it could help you to realize that your hair really isn't that bad when you don't blowdry it. I bet it doesn't look as bad as you think, you just aren't used to it looking different.

[Kittee]

Thank yall so much. I've been shut up in my bedroom away from my family all day. Around Easter and after it was doing a little better like the pics, but I promise this past week it has no curl and is just a halo of unshaped fuzz. I'm so sad that even in thse pics I looked bettr than tdy. I want to just curl up and disappear! Thnks for yalls help.

Jan

Ok first of all *hugs.*

Secondly...if your hair is causing you this much trauma there must be some underlying issue that needs addressing. I saw you mention thyroid in one of your posts, that can cause brittle hair, hair loss and emotional instability.

I know this because I've lived with chronic thyroid issues my entire life.

So my suggestion to you is 3 fold.

1. The emotional/medical issue: Address this first.

2. Get a good moisturizing shampoo. I use Neutrogena Triple Moisture Shampoo / Conditioner. Every 3-4 days. I can vouch for it's "anti-friz" properties. I am a curly/coarse girl too.

3. Leave your hair alone. Starting immediately. Buy some scarves, some cute hats, couple wigs, whatever. Just simply let it be.

Good luck! :blossom:

[GlassEyes]

Just give your scalp time to recover and stop heat styling and such.

The scalp is sensitive to chemicals; in time, it should keep growing as long as the follicles weren't damaged. Stay away from straighteners of any kind, and try to give the scalp things that make it happy, like aloe or oil. ^_^

[girlcat36]

I just want to say that you look really cute, and when I saw your pics, it was not the horror that I had envisioned. You got a lot of excellent advice here. A little adjustment in the way you think of your hair is in order here. Get some cute hair accessories and realize that a miracle is not going to happen overnight. It takes quite a bit of patience(believe me, I know), but you can restore your hair!

[Babyfine]

The others have given good advice- I would read and follow Melisande's great post. I don't think your hair looks so very bad, you have such a pretty face, too!- I have very fine thin hair that damages very easy and have had bad hair disasters where I've had to chop and start all over. I also know how it is when you feel you have to keep doing things to fix a hair disaster- such as heavy blow drying, ect. I think you do have to stop all the blow drying- I've read strong heat from a dryer is hard on the scalp as well as the hair- that's what made me put the dryer down forever! I know it's hard- believe me!! With my length I can just put it up when I don't like the way it looks. But you know, as Hayat said so well, as each months passes by- you will have new growth that looks better and better.
An idea for you might be to use gentle, natural Aloe vera gel as a setting gel on the days you have to be "styled" and set it in soft rollers like Goodies or Scuncies that you can get at a Walmart or Target.
I think hair andscalp reaches a "tipping" point- that it has so much damage that even little things that on their own wouldn't cause that much damage keep hair from growing back better unless they are all stopped. Also- it takes some time-sometimes a year or more- to get back good hair. But it shouldn''t take that long since yours is short if you follow the great advice the others have given.
How much grey do you have? I KNOW how hard it is to stop coloring- I'm only 10% grey and I still use a chemical color- but my hair suffers every time so I keep swearing I'm going to stop. I would wait on the henna for a bit- it's good for the hair but I think for now just very gentle treatment,on no heat or chemicals, will help your hair come back great. Take care of your body too- get good rest don't stress too much(hard I know) and good nutrition. All these are a must for good hair growth.

[Magsi]

The only advice I have is try to oil your hair before washing it and use a quality conditioner. Buy some hair accessories and play with it. Don't dye your hair, don't blow dry! When I first stopped blow drying my hair was a disaster, but after a while it somehow changed. Now after I air dry, my hair looks better.

Sending you warm (((hugs)))

I hope your hair stops giving you so much trouble.

[thetokenlady]

I'm going to add a <hug> here for you too honey. Take a deep breath, and stop with the chemicals and heat. My hair is frizzy and wavy too, really, it doesn't look as bad as you're seeing. :) Treat is gently and moisturize it and above all, slow down! It won't get better overnight, but the one great truth about hair is that it grows back. Really, it does. Get come cute barrettes or clips to keep it out of your face, keep it oiled at night, wash it less and hide your blowdryer!

I swear it will get better, and looking at your pictures, it doesn't look that bad now. <hugs> again, hang in there!

[Nyght]

I just wanted to say how pretty you are - you look like a young Ally Sheedy.

Be kind to yourself - nothing is going to get better if you beat yourself up.

[busnutmedic]

Aww...I'm sorry you're so down about your hair.

You are very pretty and I don't know if my assessment of your hair would have been anything other than simply "fine" if you hadn't prefaced your post about how it has been damaged. I have long hair but it's pretty thin and doesn't always do what I want it to. You're just in a period where it doesn't look exactly like you want it to. It's OK :) It's OK to want to fix the problem, too, and the advice posted here is all pretty good (except to get it chopped off!).

Bonnie

[lora410]

I've tried the vinegar rinse before and it made my hair feel so hard and matted and like it was going to all snap of when rinsing it and all tangled. My hair is so thin and so porous. I've had our water tested. It's well water and we moved here 2 years ago. Could the water have something to do with it even though it tested okay? Soap/shampoo bars and SLS free shampoos do the same thing - make my hair feel dried out and gummy even when wet and won't rinse. ????????

Well water has more iron and stuff in it, so if you can get a shower head filter. You can find one at lowes for about 20$. When I had well water my hair was a disaster (per LHC)

[Blueglass]

Maybe you should try morrocco method it can't hurt.

[Shanarana]

Oh hon, please don't cry over your hair, I understand the frustration you are going through. Remember we are all here for you in your journey to wonderful looking hair. You have such a pretty face and you hair will get to the point in time where you will feel happy about it. It really doesn't look all the bad to me. Stick it out and hang in there. :)

[Suldrun]

I notice something you said in your post about your thyroid being low/normal. You may want to find a doc who will work with you to get it right in the middle of the "normal" range.

I had low/normal for over a year and no doctor would treat me. I had trouble sleeping ,I was tired, weight gain around my middle, and hair loss( lots and lots of hair fell out in handfulls) Docs said it was a little low but normal so they would not treat it. I was told by docs that this is what happens when you turn 30???!!!:mad:

I fired my old docs and found a real doctor who would treat me ( even though I had to pay out of pocket it was worth it) My hair is thicker and healthier then it has been in a long long time. I learned to be an advocate for my own health.

Please deal with the medical issues first and then just treat your hair gently it has been through a lot and it will grow out again.

:grouphug:

[angelthadiva]

No more advice to share than what you've already heard, but I would like to send you a {{big cyber hug}}. I don't think your hair looks as bad as you feel like it is...But we tend to be our own worst critics don't we?

I would like to suggest: Before you make any drastic changes, use the 2 week rule. If you decide to do a major chop/color or whatever, you must wait 2 weeks before doing so. If you mind has not changed you may proceed.

Start a journal, or a blog if you haven't begun one already...If nothing else, you can keep track of what you've tried and what the results were. I for one love ACV, hate AVG and SMT, so what works for one might not work for someone else...I chemically color, but I'd rather do Henna, but I'm too scared to try it...I too, am growing out some chemical damage (I used to have bleached highlights), so I'm trying to baby/pamper my hair ast much as possible.

If nothing else, you will find tons of support here! :flowers:

[nomadhome]

Everyone has given wonderful advice and I wish you the best as you try to follow it. Also, you look cute in all of those pictures, and no matter how your hair looks, it is nothing more or less than human. And you have all the worth and dignity of a wonderful human being.

[tiny_teesha]

honestly, Your hair doesn't look bad, it just looks short. That sort of hairstyle is VERY common around here. Please don't be sad....there are a lot more things in life than hair....sure if someone shaved my head i would be devastated but it would force me to look to other things for happyness.....friendships, pets, life....career.....etc.

If i were in your shoes though, i would just wait. Leave it alone and wait. I would not even wash my hair with anything but water..... (my sisters boyfriend does this) but i think that if your hair is so dry as you describe, then if it were oily it would not look so bad. I might wear those sort of head bands that look like a buff, to "hide" it a bit so it wouldn't LOOK as greasy... I would also stop heat styling and everything, keep it basical....as you would in the "wild".
Go cone free perhaps and get some mositure in it. I would say henna could only help but be vcery gentle in rinseing it out, even applying some conditioner in the henna mix to help it wash out.
Try the shikakai aritha or whatever mix, but STRAIN IT first! Add some corn starch or arrow root powder and it will make your hair soft. Maybe try cassia first? It will help make your hair shine.
Your hair looked amazing before and in time your hair will look like that if not better, in time. Just try to be patient, forget about it while it grows...maybe some monistat to speed the provess up! :) (micanizole)

[littlebitl]

Another question....Because it's so thin, after I lay on it at night, it is a matted down mess in the morning and brush doesn't help much. So, I've been washing daily, or should I just wet some days? I tend to get dermatitis too.


Jan

[littlebitl]

Suldrun, did your doc prescribe armour or what did you use?

How long until your hair started growing back in? Thanks,

Jan

[littlebitl]

Sherri, Your hair is so cute in your avatar. How do you style and what do you use? Thanks,

Jan

[littlebitl]

I don't feel like going to work. This hair looks terrible after sleeping on it.

[Shanarana]

I don't feel like going to work. This hair looks terrible after sleeping on it.

I know the feeling....no matter what lenght hair is. I would wet it down, not wash on those days.

[Emme76]

You are VERY pretty! I want to tell you this cause you are still the same person even if you feel you have damaged your hair. It is hair and with the correct care it will get better. You should ofcause take the measures you need to make it healthy...deep treatments, vitamines, protein and so on. They have given you GREAT advice here. Even to cut it "shorter" to get rid of all the damaged ends and start from scratch. It will get better - and you shoulden´t feel like you can´t take part of life and feel pretty during this journey.

I have been where you are and the focus on your hair can shade everything else in life. But hair is not so importante that you can ruin other parts in your life because of it. I have been where you are so I know. As long as you from now on, try your best in taking care of your hair and making a pact with yourself not to use anything that can be damaging to your hair...and try different treatments IT WILL GET BETTER. And while your hair "repair" itself with your help(and the great advice from members here :D) you can focus on doing other things for you. Cause it is importante that you feel as good as you can in this situation...and enjoy life and stop hiding.

I think your picture is very nice and you do look very lovely. I think many women would love to look like you...:)

Hugs
/Emme

[Emme76]

Oh yea, The days I don´t wash my hair, I just mist it...with mostly water, but I mix in some aloe, a drop of jojoba oil and a bit of my conditioner.

Then you can always get tiny claw clips and put it up in the back :)..I do it all the time...
Not the best look...but it is better for damages hair to rest :)!!
/Emme

[SHELIAANN1969]

I am another one to add that i dont think your hair looks bad.

I understand the feeling of despair tho, and when you feel like your hair looks bad, you feel bad. I have had awful awful haircuts in my life that made me cry (starting out as a child)

I hope you get to feeling better about the whole situation, all I can offer is understanding and hugs, but I think your hair looks ok!

[UrbanEast]

(((Hugs)))) I used to feel this way about my skin--it was awful.

People have mentioned coloring and heat styling, but I think the extensions probably played a bigger role. Lots of people have found that extensions temporarily thinned out their hair. Taking these out is an important first step.

As far as heat styling, I'll be the lone dissenter here; I think that if you keep it on medium heat, it's not so bad. Also, since your hair is dry, you might want to try washing it less often. I understand why CO might weigh down your hair, so you might want to concentrate on finding a good SLS free shampoo. There's a great one called Terax Collagene; it's a bit pricey, but it's gentle on your hair.

I know it's hard, but I think that with Biotin, Rogaine, gentle treatment, and lots of patience, you'll get your hair back.

[CLCNY20]

I actually think your hair looks cute, but I can understand your frustration.

This time last year, I was chemically relaxing my hair (myself, and the wrong way--which is to perm hair that has already been permed...especially the tips) and then dying it in the same sitting with a chemical dye to lighten it. My hair was practically melting off as well--not to mention just plain breaking off inches at a time once I blow-dried, and then striaght-ironed...

You have to remove things from the equation. I mean, if you're taking all the chemical processes out of your hair, and it's still not growing, then you know that there's some sort of deficiency that you could try to mend with multivitamins, maybe rubbing coconut/avocado/emu/carrot/olive/castor oil on your scalp?

But, it seems like you are asking how you can keep chemically altering your hair, and have it grow long strong and healthy?

[LaurelSpring]

I just saw this book in Borders yesterday and I was thinking about buying it. It has great recipies for taking care of hair and helping it grow naturally.

http://www.amazon.com/Grow-Hair-Fast-Steps-Head/dp/1402202571/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1209397474&sr=1-1

[Irishred]

Hi Jan,:grouphug:

You are a pretty lady and I agree you do look like Ally Sheedy. I am sorry you have had to go through all this, and you feel alone. We may be cyber, but feel free to come rant, cry or laugh with us, we will support you.

I agree with most of what has been said so far. Baby your hair. If you cannot do the 'flat hair' thing because you are so used to blowdrying 'poof' I suggest you try curlers. There are 3 tyspes that would give you slightly different results and each have there advantages/disadvantages. However, with each one, I suggest a very light application of aloe gel (maybe even mixed with a light leave-in conditioner or oil). This will give you the curl hold. with most of these, you want to do it on damp hair (not wet) and leave it over night for best results.

Pin curls:
use bobby pins or curler clips to hold small curls. -
here is a very good video showing how to do pin curls. she has long hair but her technique is applicable to any length you just need to adjust the size or the sections and curl. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=50yw2W5F_z8&feature=related

Rag curls:
- use strips of cloth to wrap your hair around and tie. - can be comfortable to sleep on
having a hard time finding a video link for this but this looks like an OK description and has some pictures.
http://www.hgtv.com/hgtv/ah_personal_care_other/article/0,,hgtv_3148_1383283,00.html

Sponge curls:
- use regular store bought sponge curlers - may be hardest to sleep on.

Just some ideas.

[Kirin]

I was a bleach and chemical a'holic for a long time, and the hair you are experiencing I know very well.

Yes, there is hope.

You *have* to stop coloring with chemicals, and using heat. Once i stopped those things, I have regrowth, delicious wonderful new hairs growing in my temples, my neck, and all over the place.

Be gentle, henna amla and cassia can all be wonderful things, however, on some (like me too!) they can be sooooo drying. To combat it i use tea as my liquid in them (tension tamer actually), and a few drops of carrot oil, comes out wonderful.

Try protein packs, followed by MOISTURE. Protein may make your hair feel dry on its own, but if its that heat/chemical-ed it surely needs it!

while you wait out the growth, instead of trying to "fix" your hair (its a long process) ... try covering it.

on ebay and other sites, there are hair "adds"..... they are headbands with "hair" down the back. They cover your existing hair, while its going through akward phases. You might also consider wigs for when you wish to "go out" fancy and all that. I know that sounds strange, but it works, and I've used them to hide the damage i'd inflicted on my poor head.

You'd be amazed at the LIFT you get using a hair peice or wig to disguise when you need to, to look in the mirror and think........ yes, i look good!

[wintersun99]

Please give me suggestions. Thanks so much. I considered the Castille shampoo but heard it can make your hair gummy. I tried AMLA/SHIKAIKAI/REETHA mixture with water yesterday and would not rinse well and took 3 shampoos to get that mess out of my hair. I color with the 28 day hair colors every so often myself because don’t trust salons. Can I use henna or would it just eat what’s left of my bad hair off?

Castile soap can leave a residue on your hair that many find they are able to remove by doing ACV (apple-cider vinegar) rinses, however - you may find this is too drying. My advice would be to find very gently, sulphate-free shampoo and use it diluted with water (1/2 strength) use a bottle w/pointy tip (like dye applicator) if it's too runny.

Stay away from herbs, for now, especially anything that contains citric acid (like amla) using herbs takes a lot of research... while you're waiting for your hair to strengthen you can take the time to do the research and decide if herbal washing is really what you want and learn how to do it correctly. It takes time and preparation and a lot of trial and error (so I hear)

Henna - why do you want to use henna? for the strengthening properties? do you know anything about henna? have you done your research? there is a lot to consider before you go this route, do your reading. start with the henna thread here and then move to H4H and read the e-book, then post questions both on LHC and on H4H. http://www.hennaforhair.com/ (http://www.hennaforhair.com/) go to the archive forums and read the thread on henna removal, consider both sides before you start.

Protein - your hair needs a lot of it - do weekly treatments - if you notice that your hair feels a little less dry and brittle, keep doing them! you can get protein overload, so stop doing treatments when you notice your hair is not soft, or if it seems that it is getting more dry/brittle. It takes awhile for the protein treatments to kick in, try it 2-3 times and see... you can do protein treatments naturally by using full-fat organic yogurt or mayonnaise. If you want to buy a protein conditioner, then do your research...

Moisture - your hair needs a lot of it - do weekly treatments - review the link here on SMT's - they are fabulous.

Chemical dye - you have to stop. period.

semi-permanent 28 washes, is not semi-permanent really, but actually a demi-permanent. it still contains some bit of hydrogen peroxide, even if no ammonia. It still causes damage. the only true semi-permanent is the 6-12 washes (the box that contains only color) 1 bottle that is not mixed with anything. Be aware, these still contain PPD (if you are using Loreal, or such) and still cause scalp irritation - probably not good for your folicles right now.

Journal - start a journal, either here or at home. Keep track of what you did up to this point and what you are doing going forward. Pare your routine down to the bare minimum and keep it that way for a month. Then, start adding things that you think you'd like to experiment with, BUT only one thing at a time and do only this one thing for 2-4 weeks keeping track of how your hair and scalp react. If it's good, then it can become part of your routine and THEN you can experiment with another new element. Always only one element at a time... for a time.

[eclecticaurora]

I honestly don't see anything wrong with your hair - it may be damaged a bit, but heck - so is mine! ;) Remember - you are unique and you are beautiful. You also remind me of Ally Sheedy (I always thought she was the prettiest of the female brat packers).

Anyways, something you said back on page one has me a bit concerned - your hubby threw the camera and broke it because he was mad that you were "obsessing" over your hair? This is not appropriate behavior - please think about that and what that means - it may be a one time deal, but it has me concerned for you.

If you'd like to fix it, I think the people here have really answered your question on that - benign neglect is often the best answer. It takes a while to see effects, but there is no quick fix when it comes to hair. Best wishes and take care of yourself!

[lora410]

Another question....Because it's so thin, after I lay on it at night, it is a matted down mess in the morning and brush doesn't help much. So, I've been washing daily, or should I just wet some days? I tend to get dermatitis too.


Jan

you can do a few things

#1 dampen hair, rub a drop of oil between palsm and smooth onto the canopy of your hair

#2 spray bottle, distilled water, squirt of you fav condish or some leaving shaken into the water and spritz tha tonto your hair. you may need more leave in or condish depending on how well it de-knots the first time.

#3 get up and co in the mornings

Once you do that GENTLY comb your hair to get the knots out. I deal with a curly head daughter everyday and these work wonders for her hair.

[Isilme]

Am I the only one who thinks the husband's reaction wasn't very nice? Sorry, but I don't think so.
To the hair, just keep it at the bare minimum with products, the word is gentle, you have to be gentle with your hair, in products, in handling, everything. As far as the matted hair in the morning, get a slippery satin pillowcase:)
And please, get your medical problems sorted!:)
Oh, and I think you should buy yourself some flowers and try to look at the bright side of life. :flower:

[spidermom]

My husband is very sweet and loving and not the least bit abusive, but he's gotten very upset with me and thrown one thing or another in the past. He also punched the wall once. I hope your husband is normally sweet and loving, too, Jan.

[MissHair]

Oh gosh.. First and foremost, you are a beautiful woman. My tips to you is: stop the panic. I dont think your hair will speed up growing with all these vitamins and everthing you're putting on it. Are you aware of the fact that Rogaine makes you LOSE HAIR before it grows out AGAIN? Rogaine can actually therefor hinder your growth of hair. Stop everything. And let yourself relax, stress will make it worse, believe me.

Eat vitamins regularly, eat proteins, drink lots of water, massage your scalp, dont expose your hair to sun if it makes it more dry and avoid brushing it.

[heidi w.]

I didn't read your entire post as the mild hyperthyroidism caught my eye.

http://www.endocrineweb.com/hyper1.html
"The weight issue is confusing sometimes since some patients actually gain weight because of an increase in their appetite."

The above quote stands in opposition to the below quote from wikipedia in regards to weight, but this above quote does explain one source of potential confusion.

Your plethora of symptoms seem to fit
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyperthyroidism
"Major clinical signs include weight loss (often accompanied by a ravenous appetite), anxiety, intolerance to heat, fatigue, hair loss, weakness, hyperactivity, irritability, apathy, depression, polyuria, polydipsia, and sweating. Additionally, patients may present with a variety of symptoms such as palpitations and arrhythmias (notably atrial fibrillation), shortness of breath (dyspnea), loss of libido, nausea, vomiting, osteoporosis and diarrhea. In the elderly, these classical symptoms may not be present and they may present only with fatigue and weight loss leading to apathetic hyperthyroidism..."

Pre-crash (this past incident), there were several women who had issues with hypo- and hyper- thyroidism. The one thing I learned from them (reading their input) all is that a borderline case, such as you outline, can cause major havoc on mood and hair (yes, even in a borderline case). The details of ranges are pretty unique from person-to-person it seemed, so I would strongly suggest you work with your advising physician to get the appropriate medications to get your system back on track. It's my understanding that most women who find a medication program that works eventually get their hair back, for the most part. You might even consider seeing a second physician who is a specialist in this matter for a second opinion.

I believe that once on medication that works for your system (at the dosage and intervals your body needs), that after that is settled, it can take around 6 months to see hair improvement.

So this is a long term project.

I am sorry you are having these problems. I would recommend you avoid the chemical route, such as perming and that sort of thing, including color. For the fine hair you have, which I imagine to be fluffy downy type of hair, you're going to have problems. According to your hair history, you've done stuff as recently as 2007, and it's just going to take time. Tolerating hair that doesn't behave well meanwhile (between your hair history and the thyroid concern) may be what's needed at this juncture.

I would suggest this: go on the Mane Forum and on the Health Forum of this board and ask to hear from people with Thyroid issues. Be sure your subject states HYPOTHYROID or whichever it is (there's 2 and symptoms differ between the two ... sorry if I named yours wrong; it's not intentional). Be clear what you want to know: stories, hair, medications, ranges, how affects mood, appetite, sleep, mensus, how long it took to get squared away, what type of doc they saw that solved their issues and so on. I'm pretty sure there's a few that might help you out.

I would also ask for informational links, and since you clearly have access to the internet, I would also search the internet for information.

You eventually can be a role model on this topic here at LHC!! and help other women. Thyroid is a common problem for women, but it's also under-diagnosed. Only more recently did it become a staple protocol to check this at one's annual GYN appointment in the blood test panel/screen.

heidi w.

[heidi w.]

One more thing, even though your appetite has changed, really work on a nutritious diet. This will help you more than you realize, especially in time.

heidi w.

[heidi w.]

I hope you are aware that with hyperthyroidism in any degree that a big part of the symptoms is hair loss. I hope someone has made that clear to you medically.

I just want to be sure you realize that. Even a borderline case will cause a lot of troubles. I know I said this already, but just making sure you see that.

heidi w.

[lady G]

so sad you feel down about your hair, you are so pretty smile and have confidence in yourself! if you have damaged your hair and you have stopped doing the things that caused any damage then your hair will recover, it will take time just treat it with care condition well and eat plenty healthy food for the vitamins and i bet you find it starts to improve a lot! maybe take collagen for a few months to build stronger hair it is meant to help hair skin and nails.



hugs


Lady G

[Aljona]

I don't think your hair looks that bad. I think it would be good to try to keep your routines simple. You could just use a gentle shampoo, conditioner and a deep-treatment and maybe a little trim. You don't need to cut much, even a little trim can do wonders for very damaged hair. As a deep treatment I would recommend something with protein. I've had success with Joico K-pak when my hair was very damaged. The keratin in it did strengthen my hair and it got bouncier and thicker. I used the treatment every day for a week, when my hair got better I used it less often. When my hair was wet I used a leave-in serum to make the cuticles lay flatter.

Oiling and SMT would be good for moisture. You could use a lighter oil like jojoba or coconut as a pre-wash treatment. If you are home at weekends you can soak your hair in oil, it moisturizes hair and it is easier to leave it alone when it's oiled.

Are you using some kind of heat-protectant when you blow-dry?

If you wan't to, you can PM me. I have also dealed with depression and I know how hard it can be.

[feralnature]

I have had worse hair in the past and lived to tell about it.

Don't blow dry or color it. Let it rest and grow. Mostly, leave it alone. Just sport what you've got with your head held high.

[Alaskanheart]

:flower:Your hair is not bad at all!Your not seeing yourself clearly!Your very pretty in my opinion, and very much human!Please try not to put yourself down so much it is very damaging.

Its no wonder your hair isn't what you expect it to be after all of the abuse it has taken, but the great thing is that if you just leave it alone and keep up on your health your hair will return to a much healthier state, but yes it will take time!

My advice is like everyone else , if your serious about getting your hair into better shape, then the blow drying and chemicals need to stop right away!Sure you might have to suffer looking a bit messy for awhile, but in the long run you will be much happier with your hair. Find some fun naural recipees and treat your hair to some deep conditionings.I stopped bleaching in July 07, and I have the roots to prove it, I stopped blow drying in September 07 and I am happy I did, my hair has grown 6 inches in 7 months and I am proud that those inches are the least damaged hair that has been on my head since I was 15 years old.

I'm sorry you are depressed, I know its difficult, I have suffered with a depression disorder since I was 13 years old.Alot of times the depression can alter our perception of ourselves and others around us, and make the problems worse. Maybe counseling could help you with your self image issues?Maybe its time to talk to your Doctor about either increasing your antidepressant dosage or switching to another drug?

Please just keep as positive as possible and be patient and kind to yourself, your hair will grow beautifully.

[Ella]

hey look at the photo's. You have some growth! Let it be and it wil come! Good luck xx

[epiphanee]

If it upsets you so much...and you are not short of a bob or two...consider getting a couple of wigs. Your own hair can recover underneath on a very simple wash, condition, air-dry regime and you will be more confident about your appearance straightaway.

[*BelievingAgain]

First up, I'm sending you a massive :grouphug:, I understand to a degree what you are going through.

This is only my opinion, but I really think it would be beneficial for your hair and scalp if you scaled back your routine completely. NO heat-styling (some non-direct warmth when doing a moisture treatment is ok though), as hard as that sounds, will do so much to help your hair recover. I can't stress enough how damaging straightening irons and blow-drying on an everyday basis can be. Please try to use little clips or bobby pins to hold back sections of your hair that would normally need the hair-dryer to keep it under control.

Read up on all the different posts regarding shampoos, conditioners and treatments. It may seem overwhelming to begin with, but just take a deep breath and read as much as you can. It will take you a while to find the products and routine that suits you best...but in the meantime, please try to keep things very, very basic - a diluted shampoo and some moisturising conditioner, and try to keep that to only once or twice a week. Read up on oiling, conditioner-only washing, water-only etc. etc. and look at investing in a good, smooth, wide-toothed timber (or horn?) comb to replace your brush.

There are so many other things popping into my head right now, but all in a jumble and I don't want to create a crazy, confusing post for you. One other thing though - something I strongly believe is how important your inner-being is to your health...not just your internal physical health (which is sooooo important, I hope you regular GP is listening to you) but your mental and spiritual state. This might sound a bit corny, but maybe you need to do some work on 'finding' yourself...whether it's through meditation, visualisation, reading books on the subject, keeping a journal or whatever seems suitable to you. Maybe just something to think about.

Anyway I've blabbed enough, I really hope that all these wonderful ladies and men can help you begin your healthy-hair journey, please listen to them, as they are incredible fountains of knowledge!

Sending you all the best,
Jess :flower:

[Kirin]

I posted earlier some advice and realized with all the good posts, I do have some more. I did have some severely damaged hair which i had to get lopped off reeeeeeeally short, and then from there have had my mishaps on finding my "road" to hair success.

If you try something (anything!) such as Aloe Vera Gel, oils or whatnot, and your hair hates it, don't continue with it because the advice says its -supposed- to be good for your hair. What works for one person, may not work for you.

People here have all different routines, some dont wash at all, some conditioner wash, some are water rinsing/washing only, some shampoo with shampoo bars, some use sls free, some use whatever's cheap in the grocery aisle. Some are daily, some are ever other day some every 3 days, week, bi-monthly washers.

I'm a daily washer, I've tried not washing as often and..... just was *not* happy. I just make sure to do it gently, rinse thorougly, and condition well.

Start slow, and you will get there!

[Shanarana]

littlebitl Are you ok? haven't seen you post in your thread.

[Druid of Alba]

Hello, there! I don't think I've talked to you before, so its nice to meet you! :waving:!

First of all, let me just tell you, your hair does not looks bad at all! I think it looks really beautiful right now!I know that learning to accept and love your hair is a very difficult thing (trust me, I've been through it all), and that you often fail to see all the pro's about your hair when you are stuck over one con! So I hope you can see for yourself that your hair doesn't look bad at all!

Now, to help you to get back your long, thick hair! I must say, what you did to your hair was pretty horrible for it, and its no wonder that this has happened! You mentioned that you still blowfry it? That isn't great for it! I would really recommend that you try a 100% hair-safe routine for a while, and see if your hair gets better, seeing as its been treated poorly for so long. That would mean no blow dryer, organic shampoos and conditioners, NO chemical treatments AT ALL, very gentle brushing, etc. Henna would really help, there is no chance that it will remove any of your hair! Chemical dyes open up the hair and put colour inside the shaft, which in SO damaging to your hair. Henna, on the other hand, coats the hair. This is very beneficial, and for people with very fine, thin feeling hair, henna can help to pump it up a bit, all while adding shine and silkiness! I would recommend it!

You could also try massaging herbal oils that promote hair growth onto your scalp. I am no expert on this, and many other members will be able to help you better on this, but I think that Dabur Amla hair oil is a brand that helps hair to grow thicker...

Remember, hair is a product of your body, and it reflects your body's health. If you are depressed, like you say you are, it is no wonder that your hair is suffering. It should make you feel better that, if you start to feel happy again, your hair should become much more healthy, too! Try eating super healthily, and try walking more, as it is very good for your health. Taking a protein supplement may help!

I know I have been rambling, so I'll bring it to a close, but please know that things WILL get better. Its just an unfortunate coincidence of events that has made your hair like this, and believe me, it still looks lovely! Good luck with your hair! I hope things get better! Please keep us all posted! :):):):):):):):)

[Isilme]

I found some links for you: http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/vbjournal.php?do=article&articleid=7 (before you do anything with henna, be sure to ave read everything you can find about it since it's a permanent red plant dye, but can be mixed with other plants to create different colours)

http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/vbjournal.php?do=article&articleid=39 (newbie advice)

http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/vbjournal.php?do=article&articleid=44 (detecting what's wrong with your hair, be sure not to clarify too often.

Oh, and a nice scalp massage with a good oil would certainly be beneficial for both scalp and mood:)

[Alaskanheart]

Someone mentioned MorrocoMethod, It could be a good choice as the shampoos are gentle and natural and you dilute them so they do last awhile considering the expense.Other than that I cant recomend any products, I think the less junk you put on your hair the better.Also dont expect to get your hair in better condition if you arent willing to at least cut down your Blowdryer usage to half of what your using now. Alot of people here use a blowdryer, but you have to realize their hair is already in pretty good condition and they take extra steps to keep it that way, unfortunately its different for damaged hair. The blowdryer is going to sabatage your attempts completly because the breakage will unravell and make its way into your new growing hair.

reconsider cutting down on the blowdrying , or just blowdrying until half dry , If you dont im afraid you might be stting yourself up for more aggravation when you see that damage creeping its way up into your new hair.

I dont have any experience with thyroid issues, but IMO bleaching , blowdrying, perming, etc. will damage your hair well all by itself, and it can take lots of time for your hair to recover. Maybe thats all it is?

[heidi w.]

I notice something you said in your post about your thyroid being low/normal. You may want to find a doc who will work with you to get it right in the middle of the "normal" range.

I had low/normal for over a year and no doctor would treat me. I had trouble sleeping ,I was tired, weight gain around my middle, and hair loss( lots and lots of hair fell out in handfulls) Docs said it was a little low but normal so they would not treat it. I was told by docs that this is what happens when you turn 30???!!!:mad:

I fired my old docs and found a real doctor who would treat me ( even though I had to pay out of pocket it was worth it) My hair is thicker and healthier then it has been in a long long time. I learned to be an advocate for my own health.

Please deal with the medical issues first and then just treat your hair gently it has been through a lot and it will grow out again.

:grouphug:

Here's a person who has had thyroid issues, like you .... a borderline case. And yet again we have problems with hair loss. Just as the symptoms typically state, it falls out in chunks, handfuls. You DEFINITELY NEED TO WORK WITH A PHYSICIAN that is very, very knowledgeable about thyroid problems, even how borderline cases can cause a lot of problems.

This is the major underlying factor of your hair concerns. Until this is resolved, all the other stuff will continue to be a problem.

I would recommend to just try to shampoo, condition and air dry, then gently detangle with a COMB, not a brush as you indicated in a former post. A brush may end up pulling more out, potentially.

You need to give all the processes a rest, and that rest should probably last for at least a year or more.

heidi w.

[alys]

Littlebitl -

You have posted often here, and often your posts are the same in content- same type of hair emergency, things you have tried that have not worked, etc etc...And always memebers here give you lots of suggestions and empathy and love...which we call can use at times in our lives. Like most others here, I too am sorry for the things you have endured and hope that your hair and other life/medical situations improve so that you can feel some happiness.

With all due respect though, you've been posting the same thing for months now. It seems no change has happened with your hair in the 8 months I've been reading your posts. Also, judging from what you've written, you have tried every possible solution out there. I'm sorry for your hair situations, that is a very sensitive area especially for us females.
I'm an honest person, and I really hope that I don't offend you, it's not what you need. But I have got to be honest here, as I would expect the same treatment. And again I'm sorry for any offense to anyone.
I just want to say that perhaps some of the problems in your life are not rooted in your hair. (Though if I had the hair issues you speak of, I would just leave my hair completely alone other than wash/condition). Obviously there are some physical problems, thyroid and such, that contribute. However it seems to me there might be some mental issues that are projecting themselves onto your daily life and relationship with your hair. I've seen it posted to you before by others here that possibly talking to a therapist would help you sort some things out. Your posts to me are a cry for attention, rather than a legitimate cry for some hair help.
I myself have OCD and have been through therapy at several times in my life when I needed it. I am pro-therapy and in no way can I be cast as hypocritical. I just want you to see that people here seem to care for you and your well-being, but there does not seem to be anything hair-wise that is helping you here...

edited to add: I really dont understand why anyone would suggest further manipulation and/or fussing with of littlebitl's hair if it indeed is still falling out in places...I'm no scientist but seems to me that the more blowdrying, henna and whatever else cannot make the situation any better, can it??

[Blueglass]

Henna would be strenghtening and need not be red. Their are specialty brands. No blow drying though. Try organic shampoo, conditioners. Shampoo bars, if morrocco method is too costly. Other Hennas are Avigale and Rainbow. Lot of people here like BAQ Henna, and indigo, but for a novice a speciallity would be easier to work with. I was diagnose with hypothyroid in Oct. of '07. I'm on Levothyroxin now. My shedding has gone down signifigantly since.

[Blueglass]

I'm glad to have a diagnosis become otherwise I can't get the hormone replacement.

[birdiefu]

Jan, sweetie, you honestly look fine in your pictures- you are a beautiful lady. I have seen hair waaaay worse than that, and you are still definitely 'human' no matter what. I searched through the archives and read your previous posts about this same issue. I'm not sure what else to say since it pretty much all has been said before, but I will reiterate that you need to *stop* the blowdrying and harsh styling products and let your hair be. At this point it doesn't matter too much which particular shampoos or conditioners you use, it is the heat damage, dyeing, and otherwise harsh treatment that you are doing to your hair that is causing the problems with your hair. You will *not* look like a monster if you air-dry your hair, I guarantee this.

I feel for you, I really do. But if you are still posting about the same self-hate of your hair and have not stopped the damaging treatment you have done since your posts in September, I don't know how much we can help you out here. You mentioned you are on anti-depressants, perhaps you should check with your doctor to see if you need your dose adjusted or change in meds. Look at what is going on in your life other than your hair that is making you so very upset- I hate to see you so sad. Please don't think I'm picking on you or anything, I have suffered with various forms of mental illness myself, and I know it can be so hard to pull yourself out when you are stuck in that pit, and how easy it is to try to blame other things (like your hair).

(((hugs)))

[sputnik]

there is some great advice here and I really do hope you are feeling better about yourself... I have a feeling your hair is just a focus for your depression. (maybe not but I know when I am down I knit-pick myself a lot more than when I am happy) You are pretty and your hair looks just fine and quite human! maybe rather than focusing on doing things to your hair (other than gentle occasional shampoo and condit) do something else to make yourself feel good... a cute new outfit or make up, shoes or going to a spa or such.

[zazenist]

littlebitl, I can absolutely empathize with your frustration. I have suffered from hypothyroid for many, many years. It's well-managed with meds, though, but in the beginning before it was controlled, it really did impact my hair. And not for the good! The advice you've gotten here to really pursue treatment for your thyroid is essential - not only for your hair, but for your general health.

I'm going through another period now of hair sadness - about a year ago I began a new medication (VERY necessary) but as a side effect, it has changed my hair texture. My hair has always been fine, but I had a TON of it, it was always healthy, strong and shiny. Now, it breaks easily, has lost some of its luster, and I have all these little crappy flyaways that I never had before. But, you know what - I'd much rather have my body well than have the world's most beautiful hair.

Others have given much advice about how to be gentle to your hair, but I will hope that you will be gentle with yourself, too. I wish you all the best.

[heidi w.]

Get thee to a doctor and get a proper diagnosis of thyroid and pursue the treatment. It'll take about 6 mos to 1 year to get balanced again and to have hair grow back.

And for heaven's sake, stop the processing of hair, especially hair extensions of any kind. They'll make your hair break off when you take them out. They use glue to put them in, and string!

heidi w.

[CrowningGlory]

I've tried the vinegar rinse before and it made my hair feel so hard and matted and like it was going to all snap of when rinsing it and all tangled. My hair is so thin and so porous. I've had our water tested. It's well water and we moved here 2 years ago. Could the water have something to do with it even though it tested okay? Soap/shampoo bars and SLS free shampoos do the same thing - make my hair feel dried out and gummy even when wet and won't rinse. ????????


Firstly, you look fine. I think you see your hair as worse than it is. I know I'm like that so it's a perfectly natural thing. Don't beat yourself up so much.

Secondly, I stumbled across this a few days ago (scroll down to where it says 'article'): http://www.hairboutique.com/tips/tip036.htm

It's to do with well water causing damage. I don't know if this applies to you or not but you could try using distilled water to wash your hair - even if it's just the last rinse.

We have hard water and I know how tough that can be on hair!

[mellie]

I agree with everyone else's postings, your hair looks fine! You are very pretty and have a cute smile!

Have you ever tried soapwort to shampoo your hair? It is very gentle. I switch on and off with regular shampoo, and I also use it to wash my face since I am prone to acne. It is very gentle and will allow your scalp to heal, and will keep in your natural oils.

I also agree, don't blowdry your hair. In my experience, my hair looks much prettier (and less frizzy) when I let it air dry.

I do not ever use conditioner, it makes my hair flat and limp. Have you tried skipping the conditioner?

You may want to buy bottled water to use on your hair. Your well water could be very hard water which could be hard on your hair.

Hope this helps! Stay happy and healthy! :-)

[ThinkPositive!]

Hi. Two years ago, I was getting highlights, blowdrying, flat ironing, etc. Then, during a highlight in June 2006, she put too much bleach and it literally Ate off my bangs. Six months later, I went back to my natural color and got my hair chi permanently straightened. My hair began literally melting off. In January ’07, I had it cut really short and he cut it into choppy crappy layers. It was BAD. In the summer of last year, I wore extensions in just the sides for 2 months (Great Lengths). Now, almost 2 years later, my hair is still bad (maybe even worse). I have the worst hair in the world, and I feel like a monster. I’ve tried Rogaine, all kinds of vitamins, two endos, 2 regular doctors, 4 derms. I’ve tried CO but it leaves my hair looking even thinner. Even after blowdrying out – weighs my hair down- And, since my hair is still so short and choppy I have to blow dry right now until it gets longer (if that ever happens). I was using medium heat but now it takes high heat to get it to fluff and dry and look half-way normal. I use a 1200 watt dryer, though. Some days, I get so frustrated trying to get it to look normal that I rewet and try again. I cry when I look in the mirror or see pictures of myself because I used to look good. (well, human)….I’m on antidepressants, B12, multivitamin, and armour thyroid. My thyroid levels are normal but low normal, and I’ve had some weight gain around the middle and no energy (probably from the depression from this hair though). So my doc thinks I have mild hypothyroidism. I feel like I can’t be myself anymore because of this hair thinning and texture change. I’ve tried SLS free and shampoo bars but they are all drying and don’t rinse (make my hair feel hard). I guess because it’s so thin and porous. I’m the saddest person in the world right now. I used to have okay hair and nothing I try (and I’ve spent LOTS of money on this) seems to be helping it come back. I ordered some HF37 vitamins and some kind of hair loss shampoo that starts with “o” – can’t remember name of it but is being praised on the boards for increased hair growth. I wanted to try to get this mess to grow out but it is turning to just fuzz instead. It has potential because one day will look good then for 2 weeks will look like peach fuzz. That’s why some days I say to hell with it and fix it twice trying to figure out what to do. I cry all the time. I don’t know what shampoo and conditioner to use. I don’t know what products to use. I have to use hairspray but even that doesn’t hold well. I’m so incredibly sad and I’ve already started over once – don’t want to again. Please give me suggestions. Thanks so much. I considered the Castille shampoo but heard it can make your hair gummy. I tried AMLA/SHIKAIKAI/REETHA mixture with water yesterday and would not rinse well and took 3 shampoos to get that mess out of my hair. I color with the 28 day hair colors every so often myself because don’t trust salons. Can I use henna or would it just eat what’s left of my bad hair off???? I will try to add pictures. Please don’t laugh or make fun. I’m so sad.


Jan

Hi LB! While you're nursing your precious mane back to health, have you considered looking into investing into a lacefront? Here's a link: http://www.rpgshow.com. I would also do a search for someone who specializes in applying lacefronts in your area, state or nationwide.

I copied this from the LHC board by poster: angellazette


Here's a few threads that I personally responded to. Unfortunately, my fotki is down so I don't have any pictures to show. I plan to have it back up this weekend though, I'll let you know. Also, for any and everything lacefront, go to BHM...www.blackhairmedia.com (http://www.blackhairmedia.com/). Those women know their weaves and lacefronts and there are two different forums dedicated to those areas.:

http://longhaircareforum.com/forums/...ight=lacefront (http://longhaircareforum.com/forums/showthread.php?t=126712&highlight=lacefront)

http://longhaircareforum.com/forums/...ight=lacefront (http://longhaircareforum.com/forums/showthread.php?t=122034&highlight=lacefront)

http://longhaircareforum.com/forums/...ight=lacefront (http://longhaircareforum.com/forums/showthread.php?t=122238&highlight=lacefront)

http://longhaircareforum.com/forums/...ight=lacefront (http://longhaircareforum.com/forums/showthread.php?t=126882&highlight=lacefront)

http://longhaircareforum.com/forums/...ight=lacefront

HTH!

ThinkPositive!

[tmmycat]

I also think you are very pretty!! I think you would look great with any length hair ... even a pixie if you wanted to 'start fresh' with undamaged growth.

I agree with everyone's advice to be as gentle as possible with your hair. If you are trying to decrease frizz, I vote for conditioner-only or even water-only washing because it is so much gentler than shampoo, and would help keep some moisture in your hair. but your hair also looks cool just the way it is... hair doesn't have to be smooth and perfect to look good.

[whitesnake]

u r cuteness personified :)...u ve great advice :eyebrows:...ur hair texture is just like mine...mild burt bees shampoo, coconut oil /olive once a week, steam hair after that with hot towel, light condish..light leave in like phyto 9 which wont weigh down ur hair, get a good hairsense comb, google it and see which make suits u....and every alternate night massage r head LIGHTLY wid pure 100% rosemary oil-aura cacia brand u can easily get at whole foods, a few drops only as its concentrated...henna monthly and add egg and a few teaspoon any oil to it and amla powder so it wont be drying and then wash it out with a conditioner only, no chemical no blowdrying...for god sake...and for god sake no shikakai or reetha as its drying...amla is great and even fenugreek ...enjoy :cheese: u ve lovely hair dear...just needs to b thickened like before...and any 1 good hair vitamin..dont waste ur $$$$$$$

[Eboshi]

u r cuteness personified :)...u ve great advice :eyebrows:...ur hair texture is just like mine...mild burt bees shampoo, coconut oil /olive once a week, steam hair after that with hot towel, light condish..light leave in like phyto 9 which wont weigh down ur hair, get a good hairsense comb, google it and see which make suits u....and every alternate night massage r head LIGHTLY wid pure 100% rosemary oil-aura cacia brand u can easily get at whole foods, a few drops only as its concentrated...henna monthly and add egg and a few teaspoon any oil to it and amla powder so it wont be drying and then wash it out with a conditioner only, no chemical no blowdrying...for god sake...and for god sake no shikakai or reetha as its drying...amla is great and even fenugreek ...enjoy :cheese: u ve lovely hair dear...just needs to b thickened like before...and any 1 good hair vitamin..dont waste ur $$$$$$$

whitesnake.

1. TLHC is not a dating site.
2. I have to be blunt here: your posts are extremely difficult to read.

We ask that you do not use "chat/text speak" and to employ proper spelling, grammer and punctuation. There are many members here that are not native speakers of English and your posts are almost incomprehensible to them (and to me).

thanks !

[whitesnake]

whitesnake.

1. TLHC is not a dating site.
2. I have to be blunt here: your posts are extremely difficult to read.

We ask that you do not use "chat/text speak" and to employ proper spelling, grammer and punctuation. There are many members here that are not native speakers of English and your posts are almost incomprehensible to them (and to me).

thanks !

Oh ..I am sorry for that. I will try to elaborate in future in my posts...but for the first accusation -'dating site', I do not go for women being a woman myself...that was a little impulsive accusation...if you see the posts before in this particular forum, everyone complemented Jan to make her feel good about herself as she was already upset...so did I...It was too early for you to jump into conclusion, and the dating accusation was offensive to say the least!

And have you deleted or disabled my signature picture ? without a notification or reason? As i cannot see it in the forum now. Earlier no one had an issue with the picture....This is so impulsive, unprofessional, mean and insensitive. You are only going to discourage people from this forum with this harsh and unthinking attitude. If our national leaders would have been so impulsive and harsh in their actions, the nuclear war would have begun by now. This is so dissapointing when you just want to cheer up someone with your post, and instead your signature pic is deleted and you are insulted instead.

GooD Luck!!

[Elenna]

Well Littlebitl, how are you doing? Have you tried any of the LHC advice yet? Hopefully, you've found some products and a routine that is helping your hair.

[Eboshi]

Oh ..I am sorry for that. I will try to elaborate in future in my posts...but for the first accusation -'dating site', I do not go for women being a woman myself...that was a little impulsive accusation...if you see the posts before in this particular forum, everyone complemented Jan to make her feel good about herself as she was already upset...so did I...It was too early for you to jump into conclusion, and the dating accusation was offensive to say the least!

To reiterate whitesnake:

1. TLHC is NOT a dating site.
2. Thank you for improving the readability of your posts. You are ending your sentences however with an ellipsis. An ellipsis is " ... " please use a period instead " ."

[diamondprincess]

I don't understand why you are saying TLC is not a dating site, when White Snake did not say anything inappropriate. Also, correcting puncuation is a little extreme, I have noticed other comments along these lines, which is why I have decided not to post further after joining.

I DO have good grammar and punctuation, but some people don't know ALL the rules and should not be insulted and spoken down to for such small "infractions". The moderators on this site are extremely quick to condemn.

Not a very open forum when even your punctuation is corrected.

[whitesnake]

To reiterate whitesnake:

1. TLHC is NOT a dating site.
2. Thank you for improving the readability of your posts. You are ending your sentences however with an ellipsis. An ellipsis is " ... " please use a period instead " ."

And have you deleted or disabled my signature picture ? without a notification or reason? As i cannot see it in the forum now. Earlier no one had an issue with the picture....This is so impulsive, unprofessional, mean and insensitive. You are only going to discourage people from this forum with this harsh and unthinking attitude. If our national leaders would have been so impulsive and harsh in their actions, the nuclear war would have begun by now. This is so dissapointing when you just want to cheer up someone with your post, and instead your signature pic is deleted and you are insulted instead.

GooD Luck!!

[whitesnake]

I am quitting this forum....I am being harassed for no fault of mine...

[whitesnake]

I am quitting this forum...and it breaks my heart to do so...I just want all my friends at LHC to know why....I am sure guys you ll agree with me that we all are mature adults here and are not going to take any insult...you can read my posts above...I agree I will have to correct my chat language...but to be accussed of DATING..........????????????? FOR GOD SAKE...I AM QUITE HAPPY WITH MY DH....IF ENCOURAGING AND COMPLEMENTING OTHER WOMEN WILL LEAD TO getting offensive accusations from such impulsive moderators....I AM SORRY I CAANOT TAKE IT...MY SIGNATURE PIC HAS BEEN DISABLED WITHOUT NOTIFICATION.I CANT MAKE A NEW POST IN MANE FORUM...I AM TERRIBLY HURT AND OFFENDED...

I WISH ALL YOU GUYS HAPPY HAPPY HAIR JOURNEYS..WILL MISS YOU ALL...

AND miss EBOSHI....YOU MAY RULE WITH YOUR OFFENSIVE BEHAVIOUR AND QUICK TONGUE...ENJOY...YOU JUST LOST ME...FROM THE FORUM...

[Beatnik Guy]

but some people don't know ALL the rules and should not be insulted and spoken down to for such small "infractions". The moderators on this site are extremely quick to condemn.
Please review the rules (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=4005), diamond princess; there aren't many. If you don't like it here, you don't have to stay, but if you do, there are expectations about behavior for all of our benefits. :flower:

[diamondprincess]

huh?
By rules, I was referring to grammatical rules. Why are you jumping on me, I was very polite in my post. Neither whitesnake or I have broken any rules of politeness.

This is very strange, I am quitting also.

[whitesnake]

This Forum Is So Undemocratic..my Posts Are Being Deleted...i Want Everyone To Know How I Was Harrassed....

Goodbye And Good Luck....this Dictatorship Is Killing....!

[whitesnake]

THIS FORUM IS SO UNDEMOCRATIC..MY POSTS ARE BEING DELETED...I....THIS DICTATORSHIP SUCKS....!
GOOD BYE AND GOOD LUCK!!

[Nicole Marie]

honestly, like everybody has said so far - your hair probably just needs to be left alone for a bit. If you think about it, after one year if you leave your hair alone entirely (aka. no heat, and NOOO chemical hair dyes, they wreak havoc on your hair) it should have recovered sufficiently to give you six inches of healthy hair at least! I know it's sooo hard to leave your hair alone, but trust me i've been in your shoes - i used to dye my hair every month, straighten it when it was WET, straighten it dry, blowdry when dry, and use endless chemicals....my hair got to the point that it was more brittle than straw, and would break off at the lightest touch. I think dyes were the worst, followed by heat, followed by harsh shampoos. Trust me, just let it recover for a bit - it will not be fun when you first give up trying to control your hair, but you gotta suck it up for results in the long run - i think it will pay off!
Good luck <3!!!

[harley mama]

Jan, are the first 2 photos of your hair now? I don't think it looks bad at all.
If you are having thyroid trouble that could be the reason for the change in
your hair texture and thickness. Once that is resolved your hair will probably
start growing again.

Just continue to pamper it along and use heat styling as little as possible.

Good luck to you.

[squiggyflop]

um littlebitl hasnt logged on since April 28th.. bummer i was going to suggest one of those head massagers they have at the as seen on tv store..
those things are pure heaven:p

[bettertress]

I know we've veered off here- but in case littlebit comes back, I just wanted to say- you look so cute with short hair. I know this is a long hair forum, and I'm not trying to encourage anyone to go short, but since your hair is making you so upset, maybe it would be worth it to get another cute short cut, and then you could start the healthy hair life. Meaning no chemical dyes (read about henna glosses) no blow drying and lots of TLC with the recommendations here.

And one other thing- I also have dermatitis. For me, getting off chemical dyes, stopping all sulfate shampoos and washing more made a huge difference. I know, I know, washing everyday is supposed to be awful. I wash about 5 times a week and my hair has gotten thicker. I think with dermatitis, it might actually be good to get the follicles cleaned. I also love Aubrey's GPB, I always do CWC, or even an overnight oiling before washing. Just my experience, but it's worked. I have to say, I think you are lucky to be so cute and able to wear short hair- you can always aim for long hair once the condition has gotten better.

nette

[Darkhorse1]

Hey there,
From what I can see, your hair is what a hair dresser would deem 'over proccessed'.

I would:
stop coloring, stop heat styling, perming etc. All those chemicals can react to the hair folicles and just, as a result, it will die out.

I know a friend of my mom's went and got scalp massages when her hair was falling out due to stress, and she had mega new growth. Perhaps look into this? Then, I would stick with a very mild shampoo (like Burt's Bees---their products are all natural and ph balanced, which is what you need).

I'd also go to a specialist--skin wise, to see if you have anything else that can be done to treat the scalp--such as tonic's and oils that can help stimulate growth.

Good luck to you! It WILL grow back!!

[Flaxen]

Since litlbitl hasn't visited TLHC since the day after she posted this (two months ago), and there isn't really any more to say, I'm going to close the thread. litlbitl, if you read this, we hope that your hair is recovering wonderfully and that you will post an update. :flower:

Thank you, everyone, for all the fabulous advice. :grouphug: