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View Full Version : Please clarify no hair cutting stories - not even to protect members?



Airmide
January 5th, 2010, 02:26 PM
I am confused about the no hair cutting stories rule. I knew we had that rule but I thought it was basically so that we wouldn't all be fodder for people who enjoy that kind of thing.

I posted here to warn our membership of an actual threat that puts many of our membership in danger. This isn't some story about a makeover for us to tut tut over. Is it the mod's opinion that it is more important to suppress these stories than it is to protect it's membership?

When I tried to post again to the thread I had started, I have no ability to post to that thread. When I tried to click the link to see why the links had been removed, it said I did not have sufficient privileges to view that thread. When I looked around for a sticky all I saw was that forced hair cutting stories are not allowed - with no explanation as to why, or what type.

This is very concerning to me because I ride trimet often as do several others of our local membership. When I alerted everyone I could find locally, several members thanked me and said they had not heard about it, and they will take further precautions. It is important for everyone everywhere to know to take precautions. It is also important for people to see the face of the man who was caught doing this, so they will know they are unsafe around him. It is not even safe to assume that only people in Portland are at risk, because he has prior burglary with intent to commit a sexual crime charges in Texas, and may travel around. Women on our boards may be specific targets not only of what this man is currently doing, but also of what he is working up to.

Twil
January 5th, 2010, 02:31 PM
It is important for everyone everywhere to know to take precautions. It is also important for people to see the face of the man who was caught doing this, so they will know they are unsafe around him. It is not even safe to assume that only people in Portland are at risk, because he has prior burglary with intent to commit a sexual crime charges in Texas, and may travel around. Women on our boards may be specific targets not only of what this man is currently doing, but also of what he is working up to.


Oh my is that the reason they were ban?! I was wondering myself, it seemed like such a random thing to ban, I guess it didn't help that I was out of the loop for awhile

Ruvie
January 5th, 2010, 02:34 PM
Im not sure what exactly is going on, could someone fill me in? I havent noticed any forced hair cutting threads at all?

missjessiecakes
January 5th, 2010, 02:35 PM
Me either. I knew that cutting videos werent allowed but I thought they just canned it all when that thread showed up about that poor little girl whose teacher cut her hair.

Airmide
January 5th, 2010, 02:41 PM
My understanding was that they were banned because there were a lot of threads about makeovers and videos of women cutting their hair by choice, with a lot of us saying how upset we are about them. There are some people out there who "enjoy" these inappropriately. Just as I'm sure there are people who "enjoy" our long hair stories and pictures inappropriately.

I have no problem with those sorts of stories being banned, or even with comments about it being banned. But I do think we should be able to post warnings to our membership about specific threats, especially when it may protect the safety or even life of our membership. Maybe we could have some sort of place to JUST post the facts without commentary?

While we're on the topic of safety, I find it very concerning that the access rules to the "private" off topic forums have been so drastically changed. They used to require a certain number of posts, and a certain number of days as a member. I don't at all understand why that was too much to ask. Now all it takes is registering and you are granted immediate access to the off topic forums - where many of us talk about very personal issues and reveal identifying information about ourselves and our families. I have been cyber-stalked in the past and find it very sad that I, and probably a lot of other people, are no longer able to feel even vaguely protected or safe in our "private" forums.

melrose1985
January 5th, 2010, 02:42 PM
I'm confused too..... : l

SHELIAANN1969
January 5th, 2010, 02:51 PM
If I may be as bold to presume why the links are removed.....I think any videos about the forced cuts is a no no, maybe you can issue the warning, without links, I found the info with the clues you posted here, I do think it very prudent and important that people be warned about this, it could save someone from an attack.

GlennaGirl
January 5th, 2010, 02:53 PM
Could you PM a mod about it? All the rest of us can do is speculate.

Airmide
January 5th, 2010, 02:54 PM
The links I posted did not have ANY video of hair cutting, or even any video of the victims at all. They were news stories about the attacks, and a link to the man's picture and booking information at the county.

Ruvie
January 5th, 2010, 02:57 PM
I found it also, and I think it would be a good idea to let us warn people in that area who havent heard about it.

Beatnik Guy
January 5th, 2010, 03:01 PM
While we're on the topic of safety, I find it very concerning that the access rules to the "private" off topic forums have been so drastically changed.
I'm pretty sure that is not the case. The only forum where 100 posts/60 days/mod approval has ever applied is community meets.

Airmide
January 5th, 2010, 03:03 PM
That guy travels around, and there may be other people doing it too. They aren't even sure there was just ONE man in our local area.

I think it might even be a good idea to have a Safety Suggestions sticky or something. I tend to keep my hair up or in front of me when I'm sitting down or very close to people like in grocery lines, but I know something like that could still happen.

When I was at a gem and mineral show once a guy commented on my hair. Later he snuck up behind me with a pocket knife and held it up to my hair, pretending to cut it. I didn't even feel it! He did it as a joke, but it wasn't funny at all and I felt very unsafe. My husband saw him and said "That's a good way to lose a limb". But I know from personal experience that someone can do something like that and we likely wouldn't even know till it's too late.

Airmide
January 5th, 2010, 03:12 PM
I'm pretty sure that is not the case. The only forum where 100 posts/60 days/mod approval has ever applied is community meets.


Maybe I'm wrong, but I'm nearly positive I remember when I joined that the friendship and off topic forums required something like 30 posts and 30 days. I remember feeling very shocked about a month ago to learn that all it requires is registration to view those forums. I'm fairly sure had I known that all along, there is a LOT I would not have posted there.

xoxophelia
January 5th, 2010, 03:25 PM
I'm a total noob.. umm what is a forced cut?

Beatnik Guy
January 5th, 2010, 03:30 PM
Maybe I'm wrong, but I'm nearly positive I remember when I joined that the friendship and off topic forums required something like 30 posts and 30 days.
I was a mod for about a hundred years and that was never the case during that time. The only other restrictions are user controlled via friends /contacts lists for blogs or albums.

Elenna
January 5th, 2010, 03:38 PM
A moderate response based on the type of topic/newstory would be appropiate.

If there is a threat that we can all be aware of to take precautions against, then that is important. The police used to hand out flyers called, "Lady Beware." Which had good info on how to protect yourself. Being aware is important.

Being prewarned is being prearmed with the knowledge to protect ourselves.

GlennaGirl
January 5th, 2010, 03:38 PM
I was a mod for about a hundred years and that was never the case during that time.

(gasp) You are one of the Dunedain. A descendant of Numenor, blessed with long life!

Sorry, couldn't help it. (Fellow LOTR nerds will get this one.)

'K, carry on...............

amaiaisabella
January 5th, 2010, 03:51 PM
Maybe I'm wrong, but I'm nearly positive I remember when I joined that the friendship and off topic forums required something like 30 posts and 30 days. I remember feeling very shocked about a month ago to learn that all it requires is registration to view those forums. I'm fairly sure had I known that all along, there is a LOT I would not have posted there.

Just from my own experience, I didn't venture into the Friendship board until nearly a year after joining as I didn't feel "right" about it, not having made any friends up until that point. If other newbies had a similar mindset, hopefully that can ease your worries a bit :flower:

enfys
January 5th, 2010, 03:58 PM
I would appreciate more clarity on this because I don't understand quite what the reminder was refering to/triggered by.

Maybe in future just say what to type into Google? Or offer to sent the link to anyone in the area by PM?

florenonite
January 5th, 2010, 04:10 PM
(gasp) You are one of the Dunedain. A descendant of Numenor, blessed with long life!

Sorry, couldn't help it. (Fellow LOTR nerds will get this one.)

'K, carry on...............

I was thinking a Time Lord, but Dunedain works, too!


Just from my own experience, I didn't venture into the Friendship board until nearly a year after joining as I didn't feel "right" about it, not having made any friends up until that point. If other newbies had a similar mindset, hopefully that can ease your worries a bit :flower:

Neither did I. I felt more reservations about it here than other sites, perhaps because it's called the "Friendship" board.

And IIRC the reason that you're allowed on OT boards from registration is because the whole point of not allowing privileges until a certain number of posts is so we as a community can get to know newbies first. A lot of them don't have much input regarding hair, so the OT boards are a good place for them to tell us about themselves.

Airmide
January 5th, 2010, 04:16 PM
Oh I'm not at all worried about newbies who are here for the purposes of contributing to our boards and adding to our community!

I'm worried about people who are here for less benign purposes. I'm especially worried at how easy it would be for someone to have access to where we post intimate details...look at what some of us post in the friendship and health boards - where we work, pictures of us and our families, where we spend our time, details about our health and even personal grooming. It would be frighteningly easy for someone to track a lot of us down. Either someone who just took an interest in us from the public board, or a stalker who has known us in "real life".

I'll look around again and see if I can find any clue why I thought the off topic boards used to require a minimum post count and membership. I guess it's not impossible I thought that just because of how LONG it took me to register here! When I first found this community registration and all ability to contact mods etc. was broken, so it took me over a month to be able to join, or even find a way to contact anyone!

Flaxen
January 5th, 2010, 04:19 PM
I am confused about the no hair cutting stories rule. I knew we had that rule but I thought it was basically so that we wouldn't all be fodder for people who enjoy that kind of thing.

I posted here to warn our membership of an actual threat that puts many of our membership in danger. This isn't some story about a makeover for us to tut tut over. Is it the mod's opinion that it is more important to suppress these stories than it is to protect it's membership?
The purpose of TLHC is to discuss how to grow one's hair long and how to care for it. We do this in a atmosphere of friendship. Stories about people having their hair chopped of, either willingly or by force, always, always, ALWAYS become sensational threads where people post a lot of venom, and they ALWAYS get reported multiple times. They never add one positive thing to the site, and by definition, they are completely contrary to our purpose.

As for warning others about the potential for hair assault in public, that is also beyond the scope of the forum. Again, we're here to discuss the growing of hair, not the cutting of it. The staff cares a great deal about every member, and we would be devastated if a member were attacked in any way. We're not going to have threads that cause alarm and fear, though, when that is not our purpose.

I hope that helps explain things a bit. :blossom:


I'm a total noob.. umm what is a forced cut?
Not long ago, there was a thread about a teacher who cut off a child's braid in front of the class. That's a forced hair cut. We also disallow links to stories, videos, etc. about hair cutting, unless they are for styling related instruction.

walterSCAN
January 5th, 2010, 04:32 PM
I had been wondering about this too-- I was worried I would get in trouble if I posted that my mom used to make me cut my hair to my chin as a child (not as a thread, just a passing mention-- it's a big reason why I like my hair long now)... Is that sort of personal story allowed, or am I still understanding this wrong?

I do understand about the examples already given though.

Flaxen
January 5th, 2010, 04:42 PM
I had been wondering about this too-- I was worried I would get in trouble if I posted that my mom used to make me cut my hair to my chin as a child (not as a thread, just a passing mention-- it's a big reason why I like my hair long now)... Is that sort of personal story allowed, or am I still understanding this wrong?
How about doing a blog entry on that? It's your personal history, and that would be the perfect place to tell it, I think. :flower:

Airmide
January 5th, 2010, 05:01 PM
The purpose of TLHC is to discuss how to grow one's hair long and how to care for it. We do this in a atmosphere of friendship. Stories about people having their hair chopped of, either willingly or by force, always, always, ALWAYS become sensational threads where people post a lot of venom, and they ALWAYS get reported multiple times. They never add one positive thing to the site, and by definition, they are completely contrary to our purpose.

As for warning others about the potential for hair assault in public, that is also beyond the scope of the forum. Again, we're here to discuss the growing of hair, not the cutting of it. The staff cares a great deal about every member, and we would be devastated if a member were attacked in any way. We're not going to have threads that cause alarm and fear, though, when that is not our purpose.

I hope that helps explain things a bit. :blossom:


Is there any room for reconsideration on this policy? I think I understand and even agree with your concerns. However I'm wondering if there's away we could accomplish both our goals.

I'm not saying we should have a lot of threads talking about our feelings about such issues. But even if there was at least one Sticky or something to warn of threats and talk about precautions, I think it would be very helpful.

I certainly think helping people know when they are in danger of being attacked for their hair and how to protect themselves falls under "how to care for long hair". I also think helping our members keep themselves safe adds something positive to our board. I know I would be very hurt if my friends knew I was in danger and did nothing to warn or protect me.

A lot of people have posted on this thread and have messaged me to thank me for letting them know to be aware and protect themselves.

Are we also not allowed to post threads on how to keep our hair safe from vacuum cleaners, seat belts, school chairs and goat swallowing? lol

Laylah
January 5th, 2010, 05:50 PM
just popping in to say I agree with the OP :) :twocents:

Dvips
January 5th, 2010, 05:50 PM
...I'm especially worried at how easy it would be for someone to have access to where we post intimate details...look at what some of us post in the friendship and health boards - where we work, pictures of us and our families, where we spend our time, details about our health and even personal grooming. It would be frighteningly easy for someone to track a lot of us down. Either someone who just took an interest in us from the public board, or a stalker who has known us in "real life". The OT boards that are currently available have never been restricted to new members. This is a good reminder to everyone to carefully consider what information they are posting anywhere on the internet.

melrose1985
January 5th, 2010, 05:52 PM
I would appreciate more clarity on this because I don't understand quite what the reminder was refering to/triggered by.

Maybe in future just say what to type into Google? Or offer to sent the link to anyone in the area by PM?

i second this.

embee
January 5th, 2010, 06:25 PM
I thought that the OT boards were restricted also.

Maybe that was during a previous incarnation of the site? Before we had blogs and friends and all that stuff. When we had hair journals and could restrict access to them or let them be public...

Ursula
January 5th, 2010, 06:38 PM
The purpose of TLHC is to discuss how to grow one's hair long and how to care for it. We do this in a atmosphere of friendship. Stories about people having their hair chopped of, either willingly or by force, always, always, ALWAYS become sensational threads where people post a lot of venom, and they ALWAYS get reported multiple times. They never add one positive thing to the site, and by definition, they are completely contrary to our purpose.

As for warning others about the potential for hair assault in public, that is also beyond the scope of the forum. Again, we're here to discuss the growing of hair, not the cutting of it. The staff cares a great deal about every member, and we would be devastated if a member were attacked in any way. We're not going to have threads that cause alarm and fear, though, when that is not our purpose.

I hope that helps explain things a bit. :blossom:


Not long ago, there was a thread about a teacher who cut off a child's braid in front of the class. That's a forced hair cut. We also disallow links to stories, videos, etc. about hair cutting, unless they are for styling related instruction.

To add to this, part of the reason why some people do things like cutting off others' hair on the subway is for the attention. They may want to see people panic, and like knowing they're causing distress.

Having threads about these activities here gives them a chance to distress not just the people they affect directly, but hundreds of others.

For all we know, the perpetrators might be lurking here. They have to register to see the off-topic boards, but they don't have to post. Causing a freakout at LHC does little to protect, as the people who are local to the indecent are can hear about it on the local news, and know to take precautions, and people half a planet away aren't at physical risk from the perpetrator but are still upset by hearing about the perpetrator's activities.

The local news and local police can deal with these issues when they arise. There is no reason for LHC to sensationalize things beyond their original scope.

melikai
January 5th, 2010, 06:39 PM
The OT boards that are currently available have never been restricted to new members. This is a good reminder to everyone to carefully consider what information they are posting anywhere on the internet.

I agree with this. If anyone anywhere wants to find out this and much more personal information and details about you and your life, for whatever purpose, they will find a way - irregardless of any "restrictions" put in place.

If you don't want what you type out to be potentially known by every person in the world - creeps included - then you shouldn't put it out there on the internet.

Airmide
January 5th, 2010, 07:06 PM
Ok well apparently I don't know how to use the mutli-quote feature lol

I agree that we should all be careful what we post on the internet, but I also think there are varying degrees of caution. I don't like to make it *super* easy for people who intend to do harm. Isn't that exactly why we have a minimum post count and membership time for the meetup announcements and reports? And why we have user permissions for photos and blogs?

I'm always aware (especially here, lol) that there could even be hackers that gain access to "private" areas. I never post face pictures anywhere. I do take more risks though in PM's and the boards (here and elsewhere) that require more screening to gain access.

And I think there's a difference between "sensationalizing" things, and simply informing people. I'd be happy enough if we could just have a place to post if there's something of concern to make people aware, without even allowing comments.

Personally I don't watch the news, so I was VERY thankful when my husband's boss told him to let me know. And so far not one person that I've left a message with locally has been aware of the issue, and everyone has been very thankful that I've alerted them.

To me, a very important part of having long hair is knowing how to protect it, and myself. That covers everything from protecting it from cones and goats, to protecting it from people who would harm it or me.

One of the things I've valued most about this forum is learning about how people handle situations like being approached to donate for Locks of Love, and people making negative comments or even threats. Past threads on people having their hair forcefully cut have not made me more afraid, but have made me take precautions. I also know more about my rights, and how to respond in situations where I feel there is either an emotional or physical threat.

This forum has helped protect and empower me, and I hope we're able to find a way to continue that for our membership without causing unnecessary fear or drama.

GlennaGirl
January 5th, 2010, 07:18 PM
Not to minimize the news story, but frankly, if we were to post every story that had a precautionary hair tail to it on here, it really WOULD start to look like a sensationalist forum. A bajillion hideous hair accidents happen a day, I'm sure. Getting it caught in a sewing machine or in farming equipment...having it burn off due to some weird experimental coloring mixture or whatever...and yes, having it c u t, having it y a nked, set on f i re, etc. by strangers.

Honestly, if you were to Yahoo!News or Google News the word "hair" you could surely come up with, let's say, at least one juicy "warning" per week. It would start to look like the National Inquirer around here. ("Woman is attacked by mouse in drain while washing hair.") Seriously.

Now as you (OP) said, word DID get around locally for you. Your husband heard about it, after all. I'd say you have fair warning now. But I 100% agree with what's being said here. Such posts DO turn into sensationalist hate-fests. If a person wants to be warned against anything negative that can be done to his or her hair against his or her will, that person will have to do his or her own research because this simply is not a news streaming site, period. At least that's how I see it.

Day-to-day stuff like comments from posters who got their hair stuck in, say, a car door are different. Yes, they serve as warnings but they also serve as a person spilling his or her aggravation at (and sometimes humor regarding) the situation.

There would be no possible way to warn people here of everything that could go wrong, intentionally or unintentionally, and I have never seen LHC as a site that was responsible for serious crimes potentially connected to my hair or to any other part of my person. However, you did make your point here by starting a second thread about it and surely we've all been warned by now. I personally (I'm not a mod or an admin, though, please note) think it would be kind of silly to have a separate section for newsworthy warnings about hair.

RavennaNight
January 5th, 2010, 07:37 PM
Alright. Let's say for instance someone posts a huge thread on here about an individual who was suspected of this crime of forced hair cutting, but wasn't convicted. And there was info and pics posted about this person warning of the threat. Some may see it helpful. But others may feel, in our lovely over litigious (sp?) world as a reason to sue for some form of slander. I think the team here probably has to put all this stuff into consideration. There are probably legal aspects involved when it comes to posting precise information about people accused of things. I am no lawyer, but it seems like it would be important to mention this aspect as well. I'm not defending the freaks and weirdos out there, either!:flower: