Help with my awkward phase. :/

[terryn]

Well, I caught a glace of myself in a weird mirror and saw the profile of my head for the first time in a long time... and I was not pleased with what I saw. My hair has no shape at all to it, and it looks bad. I know I am in an awkward phase, and it'll get better when it is longer, but I don't want to look crappy (at least not this crappy) while I am waiting for it to grow out. I've been trying to think of what I can do with it, unfortunately, I am kind of at a loss. I don't really want to lose my length in the back, but I think that is what I am going to have to do to even it up with the front, otherwise I won't be able to even pull it back into a pony to half up for a while.

The option I was thinking of would be to cut the back of my hair up to the shortest layer in the back, and leave the front alone, kind of like a bob, but obviously my layers will still be there. I know I need to trim my bangs, and I was thinking about having more bangs cut in so they are thicker, and go all the way across my forehead, while still being side swept. Do you think this would work? Do you have a better idea? Should I just keep waiting for a while longer?

If I do do this cut, it will be shortly before Thanksgiving, I am trying to gain as much length as possible so I don't have to cut as much.

Anyway, here are some pictures, let me know if you can think of anything to do with it, or even a hairstyle or something.

http://i360.photobucket.com/albums/oo45/Trryn73/hair012.jpg http://i360.photobucket.com/albums/oo45/Trryn73/hair013.jpg http://i360.photobucket.com/albums/oo45/Trryn73/hair014.jpg

Back of my hair can be seen in my sigpic.

Thanks in advance everyone!

[Smitts]

I always feel like people should leave the hair alone in this phase and let it grow.

You could always put a hat over or something if you wanted.

I remember my hair did these crazy cow lick curls outward in my phase.

[terryn]

I knew I was forgetting to mention something. I am a big fan of hats, and I definitely plan on wearing them most of the time. The reason I want to cut is I can't wear hats at work. I work at a Starbucks in the downtown area of my city, so hundreds of people come through every day and see my bad hair. :/

[mechanolatry]

Maybe a bob would be nice but I don't think you need to cut it at all. The awkward phase is a good time to dress up the hair with pretty barrettes and headbands.

And from my personal experience: I have a good friend Faelan who had hair very similar to your style and hair-type and she also worked at Starbucks. (How's that for coincidence?!) She'd always do cute little things with her hair, like hold back sections with baby clips and little barrettes and it always looked adorable.

Don't give up hope! Before you know it your hair will be longer! :)

[LawyerGirl]

Please leave it! I am growing from a pixie and I went through that phase too. You can pull the sides up with clips/combs and it looks very intentional. If you trim, it'll take forever to get through this phase... if you try to get through it it'll pass quickly.

[Stephichan]

I'd dress it up with some flashy headbands, scarves and bandannas, if you're allowed to do that. Also, some pretty earrings might be nice since they aren't being hidden by long hair yet and everyone will get to see them. If you're especially creative you could put some wave or curl into it for a bit of a 1940s feel.

[Sylvanas]

I don't think your hair looks weird, but how about doing a side parting and combing your hair in the direction it wants to go? You can use one of those tiny elastics to make a little ponytail somewhere between the back of your neck and your ear. Tie a small ribbon around it if you want. Any loose pieces of hair you could either pin down with bobbypins, or you could fluff them up a bit and leave them like that.

You could also do something like this: http://farm1.static.flickr.com/205/492086076_7535e5513d.jpg
(http://farm1.static.flickr.com/205/492086076_7535e5513d.jpg)

[jojo]

I remember this phase so well. what worked for me was I made a promise to myself I would not trim until I could make a pony stub, believe me it gets so much better once you can do this!

You may also not realise it but you are at such an advantage in starting how you mean to go on, lots of DC, SMT's will get your hair at its optimum best. Your hair looks incredibly healthy, take your mind of this stage by really experimenting with oils (only light ones while your this length) DC, SMT's etc. Use this time to really get to know your hair, its likes and dislikes (cones or no-cones) and find a routine that not only suits your hair but also fits in with your lifestyle.

sure your hair needs will change as your hair gets longer, but that part of the fun!

Before you know it, it will be down your back and you will be posting pictures of your new found bun! Dont cut it, you will only reach this stage again sooner or later. Just keep with it, it will get there and good luck!

[hydrangea]

Oh yes. THAT stage. :rolleyes: I was there not too long ago. I ended up cutting the back so that it would eventually meet up with the front (basically a bob), however that was before I found this LHC site! lol. I think it looks fine right now actually. I would agree that doing a side part and maybe purchasing some cute clips might be helpful.

[Dars]

I always put whatever hair I could in a cute little pony tail stub at that stage. It makes me forget about it and it will grow just don't cut it!

[Elphie]

Beyond using clips, headbands, buffs, etc...you might find yourself some gel (aloe or some other hair friendly type) and experiment with that till this stage passes.

[Blackfay]

When my hair was that length (from growing out a 2-3 inch long boy cut!) I wore lots of thick headbands, which I think would look really cute with your bangs. I also liked half-ups and teeny tiny pigtails - super cute!

[kmangus]

Im with the majority of people that say dont cut it. If you cut it now then you will just have to go through that nastey akward phase again :( May i suggest cute headbands for work? maybe even a bandana?

[Themyst]

I would not cut it, I'd ride it out. You have a very pretty face, have you ever thought of wearing scarves? http://www.tznius.com/cgi-bin/tying.pl

[marikamt]

I would say if you want to keep bangs when your hair is longer, go ahead and cut just the bangs..... it may keep you happier with the rest of it while it grows.

I thought I wanted to grow mine out and between growing the rest of the hair and the bangs I had a ton of icky stages... I finally cut bangs back in and am much happier. But that is just me personally with my face........

[Brat]

I would totally NOT cut it, you'll just stay in that stage longer. I would buy headbands, scarves, cute clips, sparkly bobby pins, anything cute to add interest. And maybe dual ponytails? You don't have to have just one, if you can get them. Looks like you're long enough for two cute low ones. Don't worry, in a few months, that stage will pass and you'll be glad you didn't cut.

[longforhim]

I think it looks fine the way it is and would just let it grow. Adding some more bangs isn't a bad idea though. As for the back I wouldn't cut. As everyone else has siad you may want to try some cute clips and such. You'll get past this stage soon, so hang in there.

[Peter]

Your hair looks far neater than mine ever did in that medium-length phase. :D I had the last 2-3 inches flipping out like crazy. I think it looks nice the way it is but if you do decide to trim the back at some point, I wouldn't blame you. I did that once or twice while growing out too, because I had an almost-mullet while the front layers caught up to the back.

I think the important thing is that you don't do something like an all-over cut. Trimming the back to make it a bit more even isn't going to slow you down significantly IMO.

[Vianka]

I'm at about the same stage as you are. Totally awkward, but we have to get through this in order to get our long hair! I actually got a micro trim last Sunday because my hair was driving me nuts. The hairdresser literally only took about 1/4 of an inch off, if that. If you are really suffering I recommend a micro trim just on the ends at the nape of the neck. That will likely satisfy your urge to cut. As short haired people we are used to getting regular trims, you know?

As for the bangs, you could get a tiny trim, but I advise against getting fuller bangs. If you get the full bangs, it's too much of a commitment. With softer bangs you always have the option of pinning them back or blending them in with the rest of your hair should you decide down the road that you don't want them.

You can get through it! Be strong!

[Roseate]

I think the important thing is that you don't do something like an all-over cut. Trimming the back to make it a bit more even isn't going to slow you down significantly IMO.

I second this. I remember this phase and it is so awkward! But it's so easy to get stuck here for a loooong time once you start going in for trims/reshaping/whatever. Every centimeter counts at this point!

If you want, just keep trimming right at your nape until all your layers catch up there, then you'll be good to go. Grit your teeth, get whatever kind of hairtoys/headbands/scarves your workplace will allow and tough it out. You can do it!

[melikai]

I would leave it and get some strong putty or styling cream and play with it a bit. That is one of the best things about that length - all the styling options that you don't have when it gets longer, so have fun with it!

I also think you should let the bangs grow out. They'll look nice sideswept on you.

[spidermom]

Curl it! Tousled, messy curls look great at that length. I'd advise a hot curler set as opposed to a curling iron. Or a wet set. Pin-curls maybe.

And when you go for a trim and a shape-up, keep it minimal - I'm talking 1/4-inch off the very longest wisps. No kidding; it makes a huge difference.

P.S. - I don't think heavy full bangs will look very flattering on you. Go to Taaz.com; try it out.

[dudbarbu]

I'm now at the same stage as you are. At this step, don't cut it. It 's too early even for a trim, just leave it and be patient.

[rapunzhell13]

I think it looks pretty as is, seriously! Now is the time to be playing with cute accessories. I think the bangs you have now are perfect. Just keep doing regular tiny trims at the nape and your hair should look absolutely fine. Use a little pure aloe vera gel to tame frizzies if you have to. Keep up the good work! :)

[RocketDog]

What about taking something like aloe vera gel (or commercially made hair gel or pomade;) ) and trying to kinda spike up the back bits so that it looks like you purposefully made them stick out? I had a haircut like that back in the short-hair days of my late teens and I remember it being cute. Just tousle up the front and get some fun, funky clips for the front bits.

[RancheroTheBee]

While in the same phase, I also cut it a lot, and it just stuck me there longer. I really wish I had stopped trimming at that point. I'd probably be at APL by now.

Try half-ponies, playing around with product to texturize it, clips, bands. You can do that little bouffant thing with the front part of your hair to shake up it.

[Toadstool]

I too suggest a headband. I think you would look really good if you grow your bangs out too, you can sweep them back in the headband. I think it would show off your lovely eyes, and like someone else said you do have a pretty face, sweeping all your hair off it would show it off! You could invest in a headband that you really love to make you feel pretty. Good luck!

[hanne jensen]

DO NOT CUT!!! DO NOT CUT!!! Use any and all of the former suggestions, but DO NOT CUT!!!

When my hair was at your stage, the only thing I could figure out was smacking a snood on my head. I crocheted a lot of snoods in different colors to go with my wardrobe. There are a lot of free patterns for snoods on the net, or you can buy them on-line cheaply. In 3 months you'll be able to make a small pony tail. Trust me

DO NOT CUT!!!

[above_rubies]

I liked a lot of the ideas that previous posters had. Headbands, clips, ponytails, scarves, nice earrings, curls, molding wax. All great ideas. My first thought was that you would look really cute in a hat. A flirty hat, some bolder earrings, a little mascara and lip gloss, and you're good to go! :)

[wavywords]

I just went through this phase myself :). It lasted less time than I thought, and I was happy to not have cut.

[Redheaded Raven]

When I was at that stage, tiny jaw clips were my best friends! Lol I used lots of aloe gel to make it fun and funky and just had fun. I used things like manic panic to make me happy with the over all look. I think that anything that helps to give your hair height will help you to feel better about the look. I even used gelatin to make it stand up. My hair stands up anyway when it is short but not in the way that I wanted. :evil:

Good luck and I would say just don't cut. :D

Long hair happens when you put down the scissors or make everyone around you put them down. My grandmother used to keep me with a pixie even though I wanted long hair. :rolleyes:

[trolleypup]

When I was at that stage, tiny jaw clips were my best friends! Lol I used lots of aloe gel to make it fun and funky and just had fun. I used things like manic panic to make me happy with the over all look. I think that anything that helps to give your hair height will help you to feel better about the look. I even used gelatin to make it stand up. My hair stands up anyway when it is short but not in the way that I wanted. :evil:

Good luck and I would say just don't cut. :D

Long hair happens when you put down the scissors or make everyone around you put them down. My grandmother used to keep me with a pixie even though I wanted long hair. :rolleyes:
This, exactly.

And, it looks fine...cutting it won't make it look better, just shorter.

[templeofvenus]

keep on growing! hairbands are great, diamante slides etc to liven up the style and it will grow past this stage soon :)

[rach]

When I was at that stage, tiny jaw clips were my best friends! Lol I used lots of aloe gel to make it fun and funky and just had fun. I used things like manic panic to make me happy with the over all look. I think that anything that helps to give your hair height will help you to feel better about the look. I even used gelatin to make it stand up. My hair stands up anyway when it is short but not in the way that I wanted. :evil:

Good luck and I would say just don't cut. :D

Long hair happens when you put down the scissors or make everyone around you put them down. My grandmother used to keep me with a pixie even though I wanted long hair. :rolleyes:

what she said and evan a small amount of growth with make all the difference to change the entire look.
Don't do anything which will make you regret that decision :)

[jesamyn]

Just want to agree with everything that's been said. Clips, a few tiny braids, scrunching and tousling, scarves, and so on - all great suggestions. Don't cut it, though, because that will just make this stage last longer.

[kdaniels8811]

Don't cut it! It will just take that much longer to grow out. Your hair is very pretty, I am not seeing anything that looks crappy about it at all! Patience, patience. Your hair is pretty, barrettes, headbands and the like should help through this stage. And you will get lots of encouragement here. Good luck!

[Toadstool]

I just took my own advice and brought myself a pretty headband!

[natorade]

I just bought some hair accessories today. My hair was cut in an asymetrical style so one side is shorter then the other right now. I am curling my hair and then I pin a flower or a bow clip on the shorter side. I bought a couple of headbands that have flowers or bows on one side and fortunately the flowers and bows are on the side that my hair is shorter. I also bought a couple of knitted caps, the beret looking styles. I am hoping to be past my awkward stage in another couple of months, it feels like I have been at this awkward stage for a very long time. My hair is thick and it flips out every where like medussa. Today I wore some little clip in extensions on the sides of my hair so my sides would at least be close to the length of the back of my hair. When the front of my hair gets chin length I have to decide if I want to get another inverted bob or keep growing. Most people think I look better with short hair. Good luck and I hope you get through this awkward stage quickly.

[christi.adell]

I feel your pain. I'm just a tiny bit past that stage. And no matter what anyone said I always knew I had a mullet! I cut my back up mostly, I just couldn't handle it otherwise.

But if you don't mind wearing your hair up everyday, what I did between snips is pin up all the short front pieces into a "half up-do". It gave the illusion of longer hair since all the short pieces were up out of the way. :)

[terryn]

Hey everyone! Wow! Thanks for all of the great suggestions! I am feeling a lot better about everything right now, thanks to this thread! And thanks for all of the VERY nice compliments on my hair, it really helps to have other people's perspectives on it! (Because I am constantly dissatisfied.)

I wish I could respond to each and every one of you, but 4 pages of thread is FAR more than I EVER thought I'd get, lol, and since most of the comments were similar, I am going to go for the far-reaching response, lol.

Well, I have decided to go in for a trim. WAIT BEFORE YOU KILL ME. I just am going to get a bang trim. I will be keeping my bangs forever and ever and ever... because I just don't like the way I look without them (although many thanks to you all for the faces and eyes compliments, I just have this gigantic Tyra forehead that I'd rather downplay with my bangs). So, I will be trimming the bangs and making sure the stylist leaves the rest of it the heck alone. I really don't want to lose a month's growth over a cut, and as you all said, every cm makes a big difference right now!

I get paid next week, so I will spend a day browsing through stores looking for some inexpensive hair accessories, specifically the ones that you all mentioned. I will also be checking with my manager to see exactly how much in the way of hair toys I can get away with at work. It will still be a few more months until I can do half-ups, it is hard to see in the pictures, but the front half is very short, which is why I was thinking cut in the first place. I tried doing small piggies on each side of my head, but they stick straight up. O.o But I am very excited to be able to do that, it was my favorite style when I was younger.

For those of you who said side part, I am wondering if I should be worried, because I have a side part, lol. I think it is just the angle making it disappear.

Anyway, the point is thank you all very, very much, and I won't be cutting (the length).

[Hydrilus]

Great to hear you've come to a conclusion about what to do in the awkward phase hehe.

Length goals aside, you should really go with what makes you happy, and that's awesome that you found a way to do that (without sacrificing the length)!

I'm actually just starting to emerge from the awkward phase. Most of my hair is just long enough now to make a somewhat decent pony tail if I wanted, but some of the hair more toward the front only comes down just passed my jaw so...not quite ready yet but I'm gettin there haha. It's been a long wait but being patient and...not caring about what others think, helps a lot haha

[terryn]

Yeah, you are lucky you can pony tail it! I barely got my hair into a pony stub two years ago for the first time in ages, and less than a month later, I chopped it off. Plus, I had to gel back all of the weird extra pieces that weren't quite long enough to keep from looking like a frizz monster, needless to say, it was not the carefree style I I had been hoping for.

The weird thing is, I spent a good portion of my life not caring what I looked like or what other people thought of me... and only realized recently that I could have looked and felt so much better had I put some effort into it. So, now I am the total opposite way (I even felt bad posting these pictures because I usually have make-up and accessories, but I just wanted to give people an accurate idea of what I am working with hairwise.

Best of luck on your growing!