PDA

View Full Version : Hair Anxiety



Anywhere
October 23rd, 2009, 05:31 PM
Anyone have moments of hair anxiety? You know, when you wish It'd grow faster, but since you can't do much about it you just have to sit there and wait until you feel better about it?

Rant below :rant: :
I always get these horrible periods of hair anxiety, ever since I got my hair cut back in March.
"You still want your hair long, right?"
"Yeah, I only want an inch taken off."
"alright."

When she was done i ended up with hair that used to be at my belly button end up being about BSL, and it had layers.

I didn't know she was going to cut it that short, and I was horrified once I realized she just cut me some layers. (I don't go to the salon often, so I wasn't aware that she was making layers at first)

My hair's grown back maybe 4-5 inches. I keep thinking to myself 'it'll grow back soon enough.' But I keep getting such strong anxiety about it still being shorter than before, especially since I thought it'd have grown back better in 7 months. the layers make the ends look so scraggly and thin and unhealthy (maybe not to others, but to me it looks terrible) and makes my back look like I have a slight hunch back due to all the puffyness of the layers being near my neck / shoulderblades.

I want to just cut off the hair until the shortest layer, but thats hardly past my shoulders and I know I'd have a miserable, regretful two years growing it back.

but these layers are driving me insane.
so therefore being trapped between two situations that I dislike, I do nothing. And suffer severe hair anxiety from time to time, because I wish my hair would just GROW already. :sad

heatherdazy
October 23rd, 2009, 05:38 PM
Can't say that I do. I'll be happy when it's long, but I don't see how my life will be different/improved if it happens in six months rather than a year.

Kris Dove
October 23rd, 2009, 05:55 PM
I have anxiety over visiting hairdressers as they often take off more than I've asked for, but I've learned Feye's method and I don't think I'll bother going back to one now that I can microtrim my own hair with exactly how much I want off for free.

Perhaps if you take a very small amount off your hair you'll feel better about how it looks? Blunt ends will stop it looking so scraggly. Microtrims can do a *lot* for my self-image.

If you don't like the layers near your shoulderblades, maybe a half-up do would help hide them?

Elenna
October 23rd, 2009, 07:49 PM
I think that you'd be even more unhappy cutting your hair to the shoulders, so you have to have some patience to grow it out. Can you put your hair up in cute hairstyles? Actually 4-5 inches of hair growth in 7 months is really very fast hair growth. If you grow it out, I bet in a year you'd be a lot happier with your hair.

bigmama8
October 23rd, 2009, 08:00 PM
I'm not patient at all and constantly wish my hair would hurry up and grow. I find that putting it up helps me to just forget it for awhile. I'm new to LHC and there are lots of instructions for different hairdo's, so I'm learning new things to do with my hair.

I looked at your album and your hair is lovely! Your hair grows very fast so it shouldn't take long for your shorter layers to grow out. I don't think I'd cut to shoulder length.

Nyghtingale
October 23rd, 2009, 08:15 PM
I completely understand. I haven't been to a salon in years. Last time I went for a "trim" I lost about 6 inches. This is someone who I had explained exactly what I wanted. 1 inch, straight across the bottom. The man was cutting the back, said excuse me....AND LEFT! I was in shock. The manager came over and appologized, but it was too late.

Curlsgirl
October 23rd, 2009, 08:42 PM
Wow, I am sorry it's still bothering you so much! I wouldn't cut it all the way back either but maybe would like someone said just trim it blunt across the bottom and then do microtrims, maybe half as much as your growth. That's what I did when I first came here. You still see progress but get rid of the layers at the same time. As it's growing try to concentrate on doing new updos or deep treatments. Pamper it and try to get your mind off the growth. HUGS!!!

natorade
October 23rd, 2009, 09:46 PM
I get hair anxiety almost daily. I try not too think about it but I do.:o

Fethenwen
October 24th, 2009, 02:52 AM
I just have to smile to your post, your avatar and hair anxiety matches so well :p

Yeah, I have that from time to time too. Not that much anymore though, as I am starting to enjoy my hair more.

Well the only advice I have is to make the best of it, try enjoying your hair as it is. Take good care of it and it will soon enough grow back to your desired length.

curlytiff27
October 24th, 2009, 10:13 AM
Yes, I have this honestly too frequently. I know all too well how you feel. Back in June I had asked for layers, not knowing how they would look in my fine curly hair. Well, she whacked "a lot" in my hair. When I where it curly, which is 95% of the time I have layers up to my ears. I have about 6 different later lenghts. My hem line was so thick because I have alway had blunt cuts. I never 5ad layers before. Needless to say in Sept. I had to loose about 4 inches because the last stupid later she cut was so thin looking and straggley. I'm gut sick everyday 3 just want my thick hair back. I don't even want to think about how long its going to take me to grow it all out.

Lots of hugs! I know it feels and how it can be to wait so long too...

Naters
October 24th, 2009, 11:39 AM
I have hair anxiety all the time. Gosh if only there was some magic potion that would make our hair grow to our desired length over night. But i guess if everything in life happened over night we wouldnt appreciate it that much. Just think in a couple of years when you do have your desired length how great it is going to feel!

Brenda714
October 24th, 2009, 06:24 PM
Hi, me too, they chopped all these short layers in it, and I just try to wear it back, but I miss my hair so much when I used to be able to wear it down. I understand too that I don't even want to think about how long it will take it to grow, my anxiety is bad too. Hang in there it's gotta grow out sometime. we will do it!

Amara
October 24th, 2009, 06:43 PM
I get frustrated and anxious about it too. I'm going through a period like that now, actually. I have a very obsessive personality and honestly, growing my hair is a decent thing to obsess about because it's less harmful than other alternatives. Try a new deep treatment you haven't done before, or learn a new updo. That's what I do. It doesn't make it go away, but it helps. And it'll pass. Your brain will simply move on in a while and you'll go through a period of benign neglect. :flower: Hugs to you.

GoldLady
October 24th, 2009, 06:46 PM
And suffer severe hair anxiety from time to time, because I wish my hair would just GROW already. :sad

Ahhhh, the one thing that comes with age is the ability to enjoy the ride. :)

Try using Feye's method for trimming or have a trusted family member trim in the future to gain control and avoid anxiety.

Happy growing!

curlytiff27
October 24th, 2009, 07:16 PM
Ahhhh, the one thing that comes with age is the ability to enjoy the ride. :)

Try using Feye's method for trimming or have a trusted family member trim in the future to gain control and avoid anxiety.

Happy growing!

I agree with having a family member trim for you. This is one reason I always had great length and blunt cuts, that was how my mom always did it. Now I live 750 miles away from her. So this means I go to the salon. Hence...bad short layers and 6 inches of hair gone!

YoginiCelestial
October 24th, 2009, 07:27 PM
The best thing you can do is not obsess about it so much. Just find peace by knowing that your hair is growing. It won't always look like it does now. I agree that you could experiment with up-dos for awhile and forget about it. Maybe buy some new hair toys?!:)

meichigo
October 24th, 2009, 07:37 PM
I have anxiety about so many things, but my hair is not one of them, thankfully. this is pretty much its "standard" length... By the time it gets much longer I usually have to get some kind of trim to deal with wispy and/or split ends.

Demetrue
October 24th, 2009, 08:03 PM
Yes, I used to have a lot of hair anxiety after one too many bad haircuts and unasked for loss of length, but it turns out I am kind of OCD (obsessive compulsive) and tend to overly focus on what I perceive as my imperfections. Getting some professional help plus staying extremely busy with other stuff has helped a lot. Also, doing EFT (emotional freedom technique) on my own has helped with my anxiety levels.

LisaB234
October 24th, 2009, 08:42 PM
I understand what you are saying. . . and I agree with others DON'T cut to that shortest layer. You'll lose versatility. Instead, get your hair in fabulous condition and it'll look better and therefore be easier to look at. I'm APL with growing out layers starting around shoulder length - just did a Snowymoon Moisture Treatment because I really thought I needed to cut an inch or so off the scraggly ends. Now my hair is so soft and shiny - NO WAY am I cutting. . . HANG IN THERE!

LittleOrca
October 24th, 2009, 10:24 PM
I had some hair anxiety today, but not about it not growing fast enough. I was sick and at my aunt's and had to sleep on the couch. Since I had a migraine, I didn't want to wear my cap or braid my hair, I just wanted to sleep.... big mistake. My hair was so tangled in the morning I combed out probably 3 days worth of shedding. :( I was so upset, but at least when I got home I got to soak in the tub and my hair in some conditioner.

jojo
October 24th, 2009, 11:14 PM
Yes I have my story is similar to yours I went into a hairdressers with waist length hair and asked for all the layers to be cut out which would take me to BSL. She cut it mega short bob kind of thing with a million and one layers in. Like you I never noticed until she cut the first bit and then it was too late, i had to let her continue.

I do have a happy ending though, my hair is nearly waist again and after 3 years of going nowhere near a hairdresser, I have found an excellent one who has hip length hair herself. She is a diamond and does what I say as she totally understands the patience required for growing long.

prittykitty
October 24th, 2009, 11:54 PM
When I get thoughts about wanting my hair to grow long right this minute, it's not a good thing for me. This is when I start to dwell on how long it's going to take to grow and sometimes I start thinking about getting hair extensions again and just letting my hair grow while wearing them. The truth is that I want my real hair to grow, not extension hair added, but the waiting can get frustrating at times.

Tovah
October 25th, 2009, 06:38 AM
Oh do I know how you feel! I had my hair cut in late June of this year for an event on July 1st. Since my hair is fine and kind of curly/frizzish I asked for slight layers so that it would curl in the humid weather. Well, the result was lumpy frizzy hair that needed so much product to look half-way decent that I vowed not to cut it again. That's when I joined this forum.

I finally have it to a point where I can put it up in a scrunchii in a loose pony tail and have received many compliments on the way I look with my hair up. Every time I have the compulsion to have the layers cut out- I tell myself to wait for three weeks. By then my hair is usually at a different stage and I have learned how to deal with it.

When I go to the hairdresser, I only have my roots colored and the color drawn through for a few minutes and then conditioned-I leave with a wet head.

Just hang in there; I know how you feel, but it will be fine in the long run. I wish there were an organization called "haircut anonymous" - a place to go to when you have this overwhelming desire to trim your hair.