Need some encouragement!

[Amara]

I'm feel like I'm stuck, and I'm going through a phase I've seen a lot of us post about where we want to change something because it's quicker than waiting for what we're really wanting to journey toward.

I've gotten by with a couple of trims which have helped with the urge - but that means my Oct pic looks the same as my July pic, which frustrates me MORE.

In this pic, my hair is around 39," where I've been what feels like forever. I'd like to grow to classic length. This also clearly shows my virgin hair down to shoulders on the canopy. Below that you can see henna. The underlayer is virgin to APL or so and has a mix of henna and indigo on it. I HATE the dyed length sometimes just because it'll be with me forever. I don't want to lose too much length, I'd really like to get to classic and then maintain there to get rid of it. :brickwall:

(clicky)
http://i283.photobucket.com/albums/kk289/amara4lhc/th_004.jpg (http://s283.photobucket.com/albums/kk289/amara4lhc/?action=view&current=004.jpg)

I'd really like to grow out my virgin hair, but that's also a long journey that at the moment, is frustrating me. Here is the rolled sock bun, which leaves only my virgin hair showing, so you can see the color.

http://i283.photobucket.com/albums/kk289/amara4lhc/th_014.jpg (http://s283.photobucket.com/albums/kk289/amara4lhc/?action=view&current=014.jpg)

I'd like to be happy with my virgin hair and grow it out but MAN!!! I'm not sure if I contain that much patience! LOL

I also have bangs and layers in the front which I continually say "I'm growing them out" and then chop them. My problem there is I like how I look with them, but I like the idea of only having LONG front layers - no bangs.

http://i283.photobucket.com/albums/kk289/amara4lhc/th_012.jpg (http://s283.photobucket.com/albums/kk289/amara4lhc/?action=view&current=012.jpg)

SIGH! I'm just having a pity party today and am hoping for some kind words I think.

Thanks for listening to me whinge! :violin:

ETA: In the sock bun pic above and in the pic of my bangs/layers you can see my virgin hair color. What would you call that color? Obviously it's brighter that it is in real life because of the flash, but it's not too far off. The bangs pic is pretty true to life I think. Is it dark brown? I've seen a lot closer to black, so maybe it's medium brown? And golden brown? The bun pic picks up some golden colors. Because there's not much red in there...? Or is it ash?

[myrrhmaiden]

I'm not sure if this will help, but I'll tell you a few of my coping strategies - even though they are silly! Silliest one first: I have an assortment of wigs. I collect them. I love them. In times of great restlessness I like to sometimes put them on for a few hours. It helps me to take a mini vacation from my real hair and the problems I may be having with it at that time. Another thing I have found works for me: just washing it. I have noticed that the times I am most unsatisfied coincide with times I need to wash it. After just a simple wash, it smells pretty and feels pretty and my urges to change it subside, at least a little. Unrelated happy tip: I like putting a drop of essential oil in my coconut oil dish to make it smell prettier and more personal.

[Amara]

I do put a bit of vanilla in my coconut oil - makes me happy. :crush:

Just washing it is a good tip. I'll do that tonight. :)

[amoulixes]

I don't have any good advice, but your hair is beautiful! I'm sure you'll look great with or without bangs, guess you just gotta make up your mind which you want! ;)

[Amara]

Thanks amoulixes. :)

[Elfe]

Your hair looks beautiful!
If I am unhappy with my hair, I put it up and don't think about it.
Don't care about your hair, wash it and leave it alone. And after a while you learn to love your hair again!
If you want to do anything, maybe microtrims are the right thing for you? You get rid of your colored hair.

[Rivanariko]

Your hair is gorgeous!

Maybe you can satisfy your restlessness by learning some new updos, or change it with something non-damaging like rag curls? Maybe try one of the fake short-hair styles that a few people around here have used to pull pranks (Spidermom...)
A new hair toy also always makes me excited about my hair again, I want to come up with new ways to play with it and style it.

[spidermom]

Have a big serving of cheese with that whine, maybe some crackers, too. I'm totally with you. One day I think I'll grow out to classic and beyond, the next day I MUST cut it now, today. Sometimes I go through this about every hour! So I'll have some cheese and whine too.

[Amara]

Woohoo, cheese and whine! I think that really is what I need.

[maegquare]

:grouphug: Your hair is beautiful! I know this feeling, too, but it will pass. Hope you feel better soon! *joins whine and cheese party* :D :cheese:

[Gabriel]

Your bangs look great! I can't wear bangs because I have a whirlpool/cowlick right *there* in the front of my forehead.

A lot of what helped me regrow my hair and keep wanting to grow it longer is having hair toys that look nicest in progressively longer hair. Maybe find or buy a hair toy that will work with the goal length you want to get to.

Don't worry about the colour so much. Alternatively you can use it as a marker to actually be able to see how fast your hair is growing.

I read a lot about people not liking when their coloured hair begins to grow out and their virgin hair roots start to show. I kind of like it for some reason. I guess cause it kind of looks like what happens to naturally long hair anyway- that candle flame of gradient colours effect.

To me it looks pretty.

[Amara]

I read a lot about people not liking when their coloured hair begins to grow out and their virgin hair roots start to show. I kind of like it for some reason. I guess cause it kind of looks like what happens to naturally long hair anyway- that candle flame of gradient colours effect.

To me it looks pretty.

I don't think I've ever not liked it on another person. I always think it looks great. On me, though... I think it just reminds me of where I am versus where I want to be, rather than simply being a matter of not liking the look.

[friskybiznus]

Wow you have great hair! I think you did a good thing just coming here and voicing your frustration. It's a normal feeling -- I know I get that way, too. In fact, that's why I am here. I was sick of my hair, was gonna cut it, landed up on LHC and started reading the threads and looking at photos. I was re-inspired and decided to stay with my long hair!

Best wishes, whatever you decide!

Now, would someone pleeese pass the whine and cheese?

[Yayasmurf]

Amara were we separated at birth? :D

I have all the aforementioned going on myself... bangs that I love but think sometimes it would look better if I didn't have them, two tone hair that I want all one color. I'm almost classic and the last foot of my hair is a different color ... I can't stand the thoughts of cutting it so I am trying so hard to leave it alone and just reach classic and maintain it there until I can cut the brown out of my black and silver hair.

So I guess I will just sit down, shut up, and have some of that Whine & :gobblecheese:

Hugs to Ya ... your hair really is beautiful.

[Amara]

Amara were we separated at birth? :D

I have all the aforementioned going on myself... bangs that I love but think sometimes it would look better if I didn't have them, two tone hair that I want all one color. I'm almost classic and the last foot of my hair is a different color ... I can't stand the thoughts of cutting it so I am trying so hard to leave it alone and just reach classic and maintain it there until I can cut the brown out of my black and silver hair.

So I guess I will just sit down, shut up, and have some of that Whine & :gobblecheese:

Hugs to Ya ... your hair really is beautiful.

Well dang! We're hair goal twins!!!!

[patience]

Is there any more of that cheese? :D I'm right with you. Including the bangs and goals.


I don't think I've ever not liked it on another person. I always think it looks great. On me, though... I think it just reminds me of where I am versus where I want to be, rather than simply being a matter of not liking the look.

...this is exactly the way I feel too! I'm slightly happier now that I dyed the bleach part a couple of shades darker. It helps blend the natural with damaged color part, but I'm still not happy. I don't even think I would be happy if it matched perfectly.... I just want it to be all virgin.

:bottomsup: I'll take some of that w(h)ine also.

[Amara]

Thank you ladies for sharing your own struggles as well. :flower:

[JamieLeigh]

Awww! :grouphug: You have absolutely gorgeous hair! And I'm in just about the same boat. I had my 1st anniversary thread recently, and thanks to trimming to keep things looking good at my hemline, I don't have a really dramatic difference IMHO. But we'll get there! I'm headed for knee, and it will take a HELLA long time.....but I'm going to try to be patient and lay off the scissors unless I really need it. You can do it!! :)

And about your color - you seem to be one of those lucky people whose virgin color blends in well with the bottom part. I think it all looks beautiful! :flower:

[melrose1985]

-SNIP-

Another thing I have found works for me: just washing it. I have noticed that the times I am most unsatisfied coincide with times I need to wash it. After just a simple wash, it smells pretty and feels pretty and my urges to change it subside, at least a little. Unrelated happy tip: I like putting a drop of essential oil in my coconut oil dish to make it smell prettier and more personal.

I agree with the washing. I notice that if i hadnt washed my hair in the morning by evening i tend to be more annoyed with it and with everything. I also noticed that showering in the morning and washing my hair makes in a really good mood from the start.

And wigs are a great idea. Also maybe those little clip in strips of colors just for something different.

hang in there!

[brok3nwings]

i know that what matters the most is the opinion you have about your hair makes all the difference but i have to tell you very sincerely that you have a BEAUTIFUL hair! i actually love the color change. Distract yourself about it, it is probably just for now so i would not cut it. And your bangs look great girl! i wish i could have bangs like that but i cant cause i have a cowlick .. :)

[Amara]

Well, I took you smart people's advice and washed it. I actually did an SMT and THEN washed it. I'd forgotten how shiny SMTs make my hair! I hadn't done one since last winter! So that made me feel good. I also just put it up after the wash, left it up all night, put it right back up this morning (after admiring the shiny for a moment :D ) and I feel better about it.

I think it's mostly other stuff going on in my life, but we tend to take it out on our hair, don't we?

[bigmama8]

I think your hair is beautiful! I think the different colors blend nicely. I wouldn't have known it wasn't all virgin if you hadn't pointed it out. My hair naturally has different shades at different areas.

I'm not good at saying what color hair is, but yours has a lovely golden glow! Also you look really good in bangs. If you decide later that you want longer hair framing your face, it wouldn't take long to grow the bangs out.