Brushing hair in public

[Armelle]

Today at work I had to locate a hairbrush to brush my hair since it had gotten cranky from the rain. Not thinking about it, I went ahead and started brushing it while some of my co-workers and I socialized around the coffee maker. They all stared at me. I blushed 14 shades of red, apologized, and asked if I needed to do it elsewhere. They said 'No, no!', so I continued. One of my co-workers asked if I could brush it upside down and with a bit of a laugh I agreed to do so (it was already tangle free at this point). I have alot of hair, and it's rather curly in places. When I flipped my head back over, my co-worker hollered for another person to 'come and see!' Boy did I feel embarrassed. :o

If you've brushed your hair in public, have you had a similar brazen stare (or public announcement) episode?

[Heidi_234]

I think some people don't appreciate other handling their hair around a place where they eat. I had a co worker voicing out load that he will not appreciate finding shed hair in the coffee room/kitchen room we have. :shrug:

[Toadstool]

I was brought up that it is very rude to brush your hair or otherwise groom in public. But that etiquette may have changed now.

[SimplyLonghair]

I know what you mean about it being a public announcement and I don't feel like it was a them having issues with you brushing. It sounds like they felt that it was a "dinner and a show" time.

I have had that reaction before and it is embarrassing but funny at the same time. I wouldn't worry too much about it.

[Pumpkin]

I too was brought up not to groom in public.

[rhubarbarin]

Plenty of people are really grossed out by shed hair, so for that reason I would be careful where you brush/detangle, etc.

Also keep in mind that a lot of men have a 'thing' for long hair and seeing it being brushed.

[Armelle]

Hmm. Regarding the 'taboo' against brushing hair in public, I am not bothered (obviously) by people brushing their hair wherever they want...well, not over the dinner table please...I see women (and men) whipping small combs and brushes out of their bags all the time. I don't want to hear or see people clipping their nails in public though.

By the way, my hair brushing took place in a large office area that just so happens to have a coffee maker in the corner. I wasn't close to the appliance at all.

[cobblersmaid]

I try to avoid doing it in public. Mostly in food areas. If I am out and need to comb and re-bun it, I will do so quickly and discreetly, as long as it is not in a eating/cooking area.

[Little_Bird]

Well, I would take all that as a compliment you know :) I myself like that kind of attention you see ;)

The only time I had a reaction to my hair while I was handling it was when I was my family and I were coming back from a holiday by car, and we stoped in a service station. My hair was quite tangled from being asleep in the car, so I loosed it and detangled a little with my fingers. My father looked at me as he wanted to kill me, because of course, I was getting atention because of my hair.

I think he was a little humiliated but I really didn't care. I had to detangle my hair :p Other than that, I never experienced an assumed reaction, other than the more than common stares, which I like :cheese:

[3894732]

I had a very good reaction once! I had done my hair special for a charity auction, and a coworker (superior) came by and saw me fussing with it. She got so excited at how nice it looked, and ran to add ribbon to it that matched the auction's theme! Everyone gathered around to see how it was constructed. :D

[twilight_faerie]

I comb and style my hair in public sometimes if it's messy or if I haven't had time to style it. Sometimes on the train on the way to school I comb it and put it up because on certain days I have to leave super early and just don't have the time to fuss with it before leaving. I've never gotten a comment on doing my hair in public, but I do sometimes feel self-conscious. I don't see what the big deal is about doing your hair in public, as long as it's not where people eat.

[errol_flynne]

I was traveling with a young woman in Scotland. We were on a ferry to one of the islands off of Oban. We were sitting in the main area where rows of seats faced each other, making, in essence, a bit of a stage in the middle. She says something to the effect of, "Ugh, my hair's a mess!", a common phrase, I believe, among those who have long hair, messy or not. She pulls a brush out of her bag and stands up in the middle of the area and begins brushing it. Her hair was, at the time, the most beautiful long hair I'd ever seen -- to her thighs, chocolate brown, heavy, shiny hair. Needless to say she was a bit of a spectacle because you just don't see people with very long hair stand in the center of an open area and put on a show. She wasn't blushing, but I was. Funny enough, it was an older woman who tapped me on the shoulder to tell me, "Your wife has lovely hair!"

I realize that long hair and food don't mix, but I think most people wouldn't begrudge a person a little preening time, especially if your hair stands out.

[Sylvanas]

I think it's a bit like with nail trimming. Once the tip of the nail comes off, it's suddenly disgusting. Same with shed hair :D I have no issues with public brushing, but I would never do it close to somewhere people eat.

[spidermom]

I wouldn't groom my hair in a public place. It may not be near food, but shed hairs do come out and could drift over and stick to a coworker, possibly later causing an ugly scene between coworker and his/her significant other.

I once had very short hair and began to comb it on the bus. The man seated next to me gasped "don't comb your hair all over me!" So - nope - confine grooming to your own home, your own cubicle, a bathroom, outside - anywhere not around other people. (that's my motto, anyway; if you don't agree, I can respect that)

[twolunarspring]

It's a funny thing, I have never thought twice about brushing my hair in public and don't really notice other people doing in unless in a "oooh, nice hair" kind of way... but a friend of mine told me a story about when she was in school, a teacher lectured her for about twenty minutes in front of all her classmates on how rude it supposedly is. My friend now feels really rebellious when she brushes her hair in public places! :D

I wouldn't do it around food for obvious reasons, or if I am very close to other people (just to respect their space, mostly) but anywhere else... can't see why not. I do get people looking at me, but only in a "wow, she has loads of hair" kind of way, I think.

[frodolaughs]

I wouldn't thoroughly brush my hair in public, but I do carry a comb in my purse and every once in a while a hairdo falls down and has to be fixed. If that happens in public I just stick it up again as quickly as I can, and will go to a bathroom to fix it more properly if necessary. For me I guess it seems a little too close to changing my clothes to really groom it in front of people, but I wouldn't judge others for doing the same thing, unless they were really invading my private space. I don't want a stranger's hair on me, whether it's attached to his or her head or not.

[orbiting]

I got spoken to at work once.... I was sweating to DEATH and had to put my hair up. So I grabbed my brush, and proceeded to put my hair up... I was told it was inappropriate and that I shouldn't do those things at work, ever.

I work in a call center. I was at my desk.

Mind you - I don't care about other people's... droppings. I brush them off/away/etc. I also flush unflushed toilets in public bathrooms.

[Lamb]

I wouldn't do it - mostly because of hygiene (sorry, I would have been icked out by shed hairs etc around the coffee machine). I once saw a young woman brush and swirl around her waist-long hair at a conference session. Not pretty. :nono:

[rach]

i think some of it may go back to nits. thats the only problem i have with hair personally especially near a school environment.

And there is the heath and safety rules in eating work places so molting hair doesn't fall and end up in food.

all adds up . personally i just finger comb if i get desperate- people tend not to pay much attention to that as i just looks like the equivalent of twiddling with you hair.

[orbiting]

personally i just finger comb if i get desperate- people tend not to pay much attention to that as i just looks like the equivalent of twiddling with you hair.
That's actually worse for me... when I use a brush, the brush traps all my shedding.. when I use my fingers it just ends up... well... every where.

[SHELIAANN1969]

I have never brushed for a crowd, lol, but at the flea market when my Ficcare needed repositioned, I saw a mirror on a shop wall and did a quick bun tightening, I was about 30 feet from anyone and I did it fast fast fast! ;)

[swanns]

Actually, I never thought of brushing in public is a bad thing until I read some discussions here and on LJ about how it's not appropriate. I've seen a lot of girls brush their hair in public - then again, I don't ever remember seeing anyone with hair longer than BSL do that. Maybe it's more acceptable if your hair is not that long? I wouldn't know.

I try to avoid that mainly because of people's reactions here, I personally don't find it gross. I also don't want to do that because that'd make me feel like people would think that I'm just trying to make a big show out of my hair - what do you mean I'm paranoid?

[Finoriel]

I was brought up with the grooming in public = rude-no-no... as bad as picking ones teeth with a wide grin in front of a group of people. No idea why that was, though. IMO that´s ridiculous and I will comb my hair in public if needed, though I try to avoid it because I know it offends people :shrug:

[ale]

I brush my hair sometimes on the train, when I'm bored, and yes, people stare!
My coworkers usually are quite puzzled when I brush my beard in the office, maybe they think the beard has not to be brushed, or they find it simply strange.

[Candide]

I got spoken to at work once.... I was sweating to DEATH and had to put my hair up. So I grabbed my brush, and proceeded to put my hair up... I was told it was inappropriate and that I shouldn't do those things at work, ever.

I work in a call center. I was at my desk.

Mind you - I don't care about other people's... droppings. I brush them off/away/etc. I also flush unflushed toilets in public bathrooms.

ICK. As in, 'ICK. CALL CENTER," not, "ICK. YOUR HAIR." I worked in one for four years, buried in the basement, in a cubicle the size of a urinal stall, away from sunlight, away from humanity, and it was one of the worst periods of my entire life.

[Candide]

I don't anymore, but then I've been trying to be generally more ladylike since inheriting my British grandmother's lace handkerchiefs and driving gloves. After a while, the habit of getting in and out of a car gracefully, standing and sitting up straight, and all the rest of it has sunk in to the point where I feel a little exposed and awkward grooming in public and the like.

[OhioLisa]

So - nope - confine grooming to your own home, your own cubicle, a bathroom, outside - anywhere not around other people. (that's my motto, anyway; if you don't agree, I can respect that)

My thoughts EXACTLY.

[Kleis]

I shamelessly comb my hair in public all the time. :shrug: If it's down, it needs constant detangling. If it's up and needs to be redone, I do it.

There's always something that's going to make people unhappy.


ETA: I notice that a lot of people were "brought up" to think this way. To me, that says it's a bit of childhood conditioning instead of a logical reaction. (Absolutely no offense is intended in saying that, just thinking about the reactions.)

I was not brought up parents who cared one whit for many social conventions, but who believed in being practical. I feel far more ill breathing in someone's perfume or hearing them smack food or gum than watching someone with long hair. Long hair, I admire. Grooming long hair is often a beautiful act. :)

So, no. I don't think it's rude. I think the perception of rudeness is a mystifying social convention, which I will continue to disregard. However, I am in no way...a lady. :lol:

[GlennaGirl]

I was brought up that it is very rude to brush your hair or otherwise groom in public. But that etiquette may have changed now.

I was too, so that may have been why the funny looks. ETA: Or really, any type of grooming like that. Hitching up one's skirt waist or pants rather obviously in public would be sort of along the same lines.

[Honey39]

Sorry, I was brought up that brushing your hair in public was rude. I don't brush my hair now though, lol. I do touch it - as in take hair down, put hair up, but that's a quick manoeuvre of two seconds.

No offence, but people brushing/combing their hair on public transport makes me feel a bit ill, no matter what their hair is like (ie it's not a jealousy thing at all).

[WavyGirl]

I don't like to brush/comb in public. If I lose a hairstick I will immediately twist and refasten my hair without brushing and head for the bathroom so I can sort it out properly. I don't like the attention I get when I fuss with my hair: people seem to think it's an invitation to offer their opinions and I can do without that! If I'm wearing it down then I will run my fingers through it in an (usually vain) attempt to keep it looking tidy. My hair is not even very long (mid-back) but someone always has to comment if it's down. :( That's one reason why it's normally up.

[AutumnFire]

Everytime i get my hair done..people insist on coming over to me acting like im a freakshow because i have soo much hair and its so large and such!

[angelthadiva]

I didn't read all responses, but I had a similar experience, but it was in *my* office when I was working...My hair spit out my hair pins and I had to fix it. My office was on the main drag between two office farm intersections, so people stopped and conjured while I did my fix.

They were amazed that I could do the total fix w/o imperfections w/o a mirror :D

I would never, ever do a hair fix in a kitchen or common area where food/drink would be consumed. I don't even do that at home. If I'm cooking both DD (little chef) and I have our hair up and secured. I know how clean our hair is, but still.

If by chance I'm out in public, I go into a bathroom (not necessarily the stall) and do a fix. Occasionally I'm in class and my head starts to hurt so I will take out a clip and adjust for comforts sake...

[Armelle]

I must say it's interesting to read the comments from the two camps of 'I was raised to view public brushing as rude' and 'What's the big deal?'. I love to watch people brush their hair if it's long.

I find any attention I gather from others regarding my hair to be the whole point of having this dang heavy curtain hanging from my scalp. :D

I have to agree with an earlier poster who mentioned the 'dinner and a show' effect. The staring can be a bit weird.

[Aries_jb]

For me, it's an issue of potential shed hairs, which is icky to me.

That said, I come into my lab practically every morning with my hair wet and then "scrunch out the crunch" when it's dry, then put it up in my usual bun. The whole thing takes one minute, but if I need more than that I go to the restroom and sort it out. However, I would never do this in a more public area, at a table where there is food (or a table where other people are sitting in general). You just can't be sure what's going to bother people and what isn't.

[bjt]

I shed a fair amount when I brush my hair, so I don't do that much in public (I don't like other people's shed hair all over me, so I figure I won't do the same to them). It doesn't offend me or anything, though. What really does offend me is people who clip their nails on the subway. YUCK! I even saw one woman put on deodorant on the subway! It was actually amazing (and gross!)

Ale--my husband carries a little comb for his beard & mustache, too--and though he's discrete about it, occasionally people will see him do it and they are always amazed too!

[Maddy25]

I brush my hair all the time at work, I have a brush in my cublicle, no body rally cares because its my space.

[AnnaMarie]

I don't brush my h air in public, it just makes me feel uncomfortable . For the same reason I don't really like to touch my hair at all when I'm in public, I guess I don't like to draw attention to it and for some reason when I take my hair down it feels like I'm taking off a piece of clothing or something, it makes me well, sort of naked?? Its hard to explain. Although when I do wear it out (very rare occasions) I have an awful habit of playing with the ends and even that seems to draw some attention :confused:. I mostly just keep it up and pretend like its not there when I'm around anyone other than my husband :p

[clairenewcastle]

Excuse me, it's the 21st centuary! Surely I can discreetly run a comb through my hair and dab on some lipgloss without createing the sort reaction akin to scratching my...apparentley not! Like a lot of people I was brought up to believe that it was rude to groom yourself in public. My husband shares this belief, he's very against me doing even the smallest emergency repair. Do people still care about this sort of thing? After all, it's only 100 years since wearing trousers was socially unacceptable. Will society ever allow us to repair the damage with lipstick and comb without us appearing rude, vain, self obssessed or badly brought up? I've none of the aforementioned traits yet I'm so concious of displaying them I allow myself to look ungroomed rather than be wrongly judged.

[Shermie Girl]

I was brought up that it is very rude to brush your hair or otherwise groom in public. But that etiquette may have changed now.

So was I. The only "grooming" I ever do in public is discrete lipstick or gloss touch-ups. :D

[Carolyn]

I was brought up not to groom in public. I never could understand why not. It's one of those things that I left behind when I grew up. I do what needs to be done, when it needs to be done. I wouldn't brush my hair over the buffet table but I've often re-done a bun or braid at my table with minimal combing. I just don't worry about what other people think. I love to watch combing and brushing and general hair playing in public. I don't think it's rude at all. I also enjoy watching lipstick being applied.

[Botticelli Gold]

I will discretely comb my hair if necessary in public.
Like others here I won't do it in eating areas, or drop hair everywhere but I see nothing wrong with a quick tidy-up when it needs it.
I am like others in that I don't like to be seen as "showing off", but there is a big difference between discretely running a comb through your hair to tidy it up, and standing out in the open flicking it all about, brushing it upside down and generally making a show of it.

[Amara]

The only time I can think of brushing my hair where anyone other than my husband could see is in a dressing room between dance numbers. I don't think it's polite.

[rhosyn_du]

I think grooming while you're actively interacting with other people is rude, as it implies you're not really paying attention to the people you're interacting with, but I'm a bit surprised that people think it's rude to groom in public space. To me, it seems like it would be far more rude to take up public restroom space for messing with my hair than to re-do a braid while waiting for my bus, for example.

[Rigani]

In this respect I'm very down-to-earth. There's nothing wrong about combing/brushing hair. It's nothing I'm ashamed of, so nothing speaks against it.

The only thing I'm bothered by, is that some people may think I want to show my hair off :D

[RoseRedDead]

I largely agree with spidermom and OhioLisa.

I've been brought up to not groom in public. I do not comb/brush my hair outside my home unless it's outside (like exiting a car before going into a building), in a restroom/powder room, etc. I know some people are icked out by shed hairs, and I'm okay with that.

If my hairdo needs adjusting, I will adjust it very quicky/discreetly wherever I am, if possible.

Sometimes I wish this wasn't a big deal, because when I have done some of those things in public, I've gotten reprimanded by my parents... boo. But I do understand the logic.

[Armelle]

I wouldn't brush my hair over the buffet table...

Ok, this made me laugh out loud! :grin:

[Merlin]

Excuse me, it's the 21st centuary! Surely I can discreetly run a comb through my hair and dab on some lipgloss without createing the sort reaction akin to scratching my...apparentley not!

I've never thought there was any problem with "public grooming" when I've seen it, it never worries me and I've never thought any the less of the person doing it. Until I read this thread it never occurred to me that anybody had a problem with it!

What I have noticed is that so many people have said it was something they were brought up to not do, and that's a powerful force. Me, I have no problems with public grooming but end a sentence with a preposition and you're toast pal. This doesn't matter a damn in the global scheme of things but my old mum had a real thing about it (which she learned from her teacher in about 1920) and I sort of caught it off her. I'm sure that most people who've posted thus far regularly say "what are you looking for?" and don't worry a bit, but they've been brought up to not brush their hair in public...

The thing is....if you did brush your hair in public what would actually happen? Well, you'd have brushed hair. Nothing else. The same way that nothing is going to happen to the people who made the tv advert campaign which reminds us that "we must think about the CO2 emissions we are all responsible for".

Some learned behaviours exist for good reasons - like covering your mouth when you yawn and not dropping litter. Some are really just inherited prejudices for which we have to blame our parents.

[Lamb]

So was I. The only "grooming" I ever do in public is discrete lipstick or gloss touch-ups. :D
Believe it or not, but to this day I'm nervous of applying lipbalm to my lips in public. I remember a teacher berating a classmate of mine for doing that in class. :shrug:

[Belledandy]

For a time in school it was the "in" thing to carry brushes and lotion in your bag to "freshen up" during the day (This was before the girls were of age to wear makeup) and the other girls in class would brush and put up their hair frequently in the beginning or end of class. I never thought much of it till a substitute teacher went ballistic and the whole class got a rant/lecture on public rudeness and personal grooming.

[Kleis]

I never thought much of it till a substitute teacher went ballistic and the whole class got a rant/lecture on public rudeness and personal grooming.

You see, I think that is very rude, far ruder than putting up one's hair.

[Flynn]

I was brought up that it is very rude to brush your hair or otherwise groom in public. But that etiquette may have changed now.

I'm a tiny bit younger than you, and I was brought up to think similarly. It's supposed to be both unhygienic and sexually suggestive. *Shrugs*

Not that it necessarily stops me. >_o I suppose it suggests that that taboo has been relaxed.

[Quixii]

I tend to avoid brushing my hair in public, and now I don't brush it at all, but I know when I did there were times, say, before a performance where I had to put it up in an updo so I brushed it out, and I definitely got attention. It's nice and embarrassing at the same time. :)

[Teazel]

Fantastic post, Merlin! :applause :rollin:

My parents didn't give a hoot where anyone brushed their hair, so I've been spared that conditioning. We lived cheek by jowl on small boats for much of my childhood and being fastidious about such things would have driven everyone mad.

However, I'm aware that many people are grossed out by shed hair. I try to do my detangling outside, or at least collect my sheds and dispose of them.

The only thing that gives me pause about grooming my hair in public is the fear that I'll appear to be showing off. I try to do it apart from everyone if I can.

[silverspun]

I know for sure in schools and such girls always carried mini-brushes and would brush their hair in class/etc.

[ericthegreat]

I too was brought up to not groom myself in view of the public eye. For many people, they simply don't want to be privy to your personal grooming habits, and to groom yourself in public is the to commit the ultimate act of vanity.

With brushing/combing/fixing your hair, some people may feel grossed out, they don't want the possibility of any of your shed hairs to get on them. Especially if you are in a place where people are eating or drinking, it is not only inconsiderate but also unsanitary to be doing anything with your hair.

With all that being said however, from the time I was in high school all through college and up to this very day, I will carry both my favorite boar bristle brush and my favorite paddle brush in my bag and take them with me wherever I go. I would brush my hair whenever the class was taking a break. I never thought anything of it then, I was young and altho my classmates would sometimes tease me about it I was never bothered by it, I didn't ever feel ashamed. Now however, the only time I will brush my hair outside my house is when I'm going out to the mall or at a restaurant or the movies or the gym etc. and I'm in the public bathroom.

[LittleOrca]

When I brush my hair in public, I usually do it either right as I get out of my car since I have room to move or in the bathroom. Of course, brushing my hair in the bathroom starts up those bathroom conversations. :)

[CaityBear]

Well, if there are plates of food around, I'd say you shouldn't because loose hairs could get into the food. If it's just coffee or something, or just in public in general, I say to each their own. I have a habit of ALWAYS fingercombing my hair when I wear it down. I constantly find myself doing that.

[Morrighan]

I've only thought about this topic once because of a certain incident, but have since forgotten about it until now. When I was in school many girls brushed their hair in class, in the hallways, and in the bathroom. I never saw it as a private matter. I guess I kind of view it like tieing your shoes. If your shoe laces become untied, you tie them. If your hair becomes messy, you comb it. No matter where you are. Though now that I'm out of school, I very rarely see people brushing their hair in public, so maybe it's a teenage girl thing.

In school I wasn't one to care about messy hair, and there were other factors involved, so I never did it. That is until they wanted me to start wearing a hair net and bun when working in the school cafeteria, even though it was already always braided while there. I found that difficult because I didn't know how to make a real bun. While I could braid messy hair quickly before lunch, I found it easier to comb it out before doing my "bun".

I didn't have enough time after class to make a detour to the student bathrooms and still make it on time to work in the cafeteria. And doing it in class wasn't an option because in that school people watched me all the time, and if I were to do anything to unintentionally bring attention to myself, even if it's normal for other people, they would stare, make comments and sometimes threats and minor physical stuff.

So one day I was in the cafeteria (the back part where we prepare the food) bathroom combing and about to bun. That bathroom was separated from the cafeteria by a storage room and a laundry room by the way. One of the adults who works in the cafeteria walked in and saw me. She got upset and told me, "It's dirty to do that in a cafeteria. Don't you have any common sense? Stop that! Stop it right now!" Then she walked out. After standing frozen for a while I started to bun. Then she came in again and said, "If I ever catch you doing that again I'm going to report you." and walked back out again. She seemed very disturbed by this and her face was red.

I guess she was kind of right. It's possible a shed hair can travel through the two rooms and get into the cafeteria area and end up in the food. I wasn't hair conscious at all, and didn't even think about sheds. But at the same time, I thought it was fine since I wasn't in the actual cafeteria. And considering the circumstances that was the safest and most convenient place to do my hair. I think putting your hair in a bun or braid can make sheds fall too, and I saw student workers playing with their hair in the actual cafeteria and nothing was said to them, so I don't understand why combing it in that bathroom was such a big deal.

[RocketDog]

One of my clearest long-hair memories was watching, entranced, while the girl who sat in front of me in 8th grade geography brush out her hip-length hair every day after sitting down in class. She and I were hairtype twins, even the same color, and I used to dream about having a head of hair just like hers someday...

That aside, I don't feel comfortable brushing out my hair in public. When I had a bob and heat-styled every day I used to carry around a comb to straighten things out and set my fringe to rights, but I always ducked into a bathroom to do it. I didn't think of the 'exhibitionist' side of it - it just always made me uncomfortable to groom in public, same as blowing my nose or cleaning my nails. The funny thing is I'm not a very 'proper' person, but I just don't like doing stuff like that where people can watch me.

[QueenAnne'sLace]

It seems our Puritan roots have not completely left us.:doh:

Doing one's hair used to be called your "toilet" which essentially meant grooming and bathing, which was a private thing that only ladies maids got to help out with and see. For some reason there's this idea (probably Victorian in origin) that we have to look perfectly constricted at all times in public, as though a braid isn't going to fuzz out as the day progresses.

(That's the one thing that always drove me nuts about Dr. Quinn and my attempts to imitate her hairstyles. He hair never really looked disheveled from daily work. I don't have the luxury of shot cuts!):violin:

[sally_neuf]

wow! this is so different to what I'm used to. In my country "everyone" grooms in.. public spaces .except, of course, a cooking-eating area. But, I mean, if you sit in the university campus, you'll see girls combing her hair, other ones putting lipgloss etc. Of course, there's always the old excuse "I have to powder my nose" but it's usually just a phrase to go the bathroom and talk with a girlfriend about some guy tehehe!

And of course, I have seeing some grooming that should NEVER EVER be done outside the privacity of your house. (I will not share those nauseating experiences here, for the sake of public health)

In generall, it's all about commong sense, you wouldn't brush your hair all over the food, but I don't see anything wrong in grooming your hair if you need to, while waiting at the bus or so.. mmm

[Kleis]

Heck, I've often thought that a great benefit to long hair is it gives me something to do when bored. Many is the time I've had epic S&D sessions in public as well, and that leaves far more residue than just combining. (When I comb, I sweep my hand down to gather all the sheds and tuck them away until I can get to a trash can, unless I'm in an open area.)

[Kristen_Marie]

I had a similar experience! I was at work in the breakroom (on the side opposite the food area) and since I had just finished my 4AM shift was in need of a combing and re-braiding. Since no one else was in the room I undid my original braid and started a careful de-tangle and combing with fingers/brush. Five minutes in to it, some guy I know to like me ( though I'm not fond of him ) came in and just stood there...and stared...

After a minute I asked him if he thought I was going to do a trick. That seemed to bring him back down but he didn't leave. >.> Then more people started coming in for their breaks and soon I had several co-workers standing around behind me while I detangled and then rebraided my hair. It was all sorts of embarrassing! I kept getting comments like "You make it look so easy!" About the braiding. It is funny in retrospect, but at the time I was mortified. >.<

[ilovelonghair]

I always have a feeling it's not right to brush your hair in public, not sure why, but you nearly never see someone doing it.
And yes some people find shed hair very scary. Maybe it's because it got the roots attatched to it?

[janiejones]

This thread is fascinating! I, personally, will not take a brush with me with any intention of using it in public, and I do think it's a little disconcerting when other people brush their hair in public because it seems so....private. Nothing is really wrong with it, and I don't think "eww gross" about the person brushing their hair....it's just unexpected and seems unusual probably due to upbringing/culture.

[adiapalic]

I don't think it would be rude. I certainly wouldn't mind if you did it. I brush my hair at places sometimes--so long as there's the proverbial bubble around me keeping me out of others' personal space. Seems fine to me.

[Kotora]

I was also raised that to brush in public was rude, but I will do it in my cubicle. That way, all my "leavings" stay in my personal space. We have a maintenance crew that comes around and vacuums from time to time, so I think it's OK. It's not like I'm whipping up a batch of cookies there or anything.

On another note, I work in space shuttle processing. When I'm working in the shuttle, I will braid my hair or otherwise secure it somehow. I usually do this before I report for the job.

Tonight, however, I got a last-minute call to support a job and had to rush to the processing area. Once I got there and realized I would be working inside the vehicle, I needed to do a braid to keep from shedding hair and causing a debris hazard. I was going over the paperwork with the technician, and, without thinking about it, I just started to do my braid (my hair is to my waist).

The tech just stood there dumbfounded. He asked me if I always do my own braids like that. He said he'd never seen someone braid hair that long by themselves before. He even called over another tech to watch it. He seemd amazed at the speed with which I could do a braid. Well, hell, after many years of doing it, I've gotten pretty quick at it, I guess. Too funny. I felt a little self-conscious, but I had to get it done.

Unfortunately, I can't wear any of those beautiful hair toys you all wear at work. I can't use anything that could fall out (pins, combs), or anything that could poke a hole in something (sticks, forks). I get really creative with elastics and claw clips. It ain't pretty, but it works!

[Debra83]

Cool space shuttle processing story!!!


I guess I was brought up not to do that in public, although, I remember times in school doing it. But for the most part, I would go the bathroom to do it. I would never have done it in front of company at home or anything. I wouldn't do it at work ever, because that's not what I'm paid to do there and don't want to look like I'm slacking. I think combing your hair in front of people gives a feeling of intimacy, and there is not a lot of people I want to be thinking intimately of me. I wouldn't put make up on in front of them, (eyeliner, mascara....) or at my job, or in front of company. Putting it up in a quick ponytail or claw clip is not the same in my opinion. That's a functional gesture. But taking time to detangle, and 20 brush strokes is different.

A lady I work with though religiously brushes her long hair every morning while we are doing our huddle. At first it kinda shocked me, but now I'm used to it.

[Arashi]

I personally think that having messy/tangled hair and leaving it that way for extended periods of time is far more "icky" than discretely tidying it up in public could ever be. I carry a small comb in my purse and will *gasp* comb it out in public(the shock! the horror! what will the neighbors think?!) if needed. I will never do it near food or close by other people and I personally think that people throwing a hissy fit about someone else combing their hair is far more "rude" than the act itself could ever be.

I've never really ever gotten any reactions when combing my hair in public, neither positive nor negative. I have also seen countless other people do it. I really don't understand the big deal about it.

[prittykitty]

I personally would not want someone brushing their hair where food is eaten or served, especially if I was eating at that particular place. Hair sheds when you brush it and as light in weight as it is, can end up in anything, including someones food or drink. Public restrooms are provided in all work places and I feel it is not too much for someone to go there to brush their hair. It goes along with everything. Would you want someone to for example wash their face in the sink in the break room at work or maybe even brush their teeth in it or would the restroom be more appropriate? Brushing hair is no different.

[Amoretti]

I'm OK with public grooming as long as it's in a place where there's no chance of the (inevitably) shed hair drifting onto me. :lol:

I wouldn't brush my hair on a train, for instance, just as I wouldn't spit out sunflower seeds on the floor. I just don't want to contribute to the general layer of things on the ground or floor. It's a question of being tidy, not of being old fashioned or not.

[Toadstool]

I was also raised that to brush in public was rude, but I will do it in my cubicle. That way, all my "leavings" stay in my personal space. We have a maintenance crew that comes around and vacuums from time to time, so I think it's OK. It's not like I'm whipping up a batch of cookies there or anything.



.....ROFL!!

[PhillyGirl1978@]

I got spoken to at work once.... I was sweating to DEATH and had to put my hair up. So I grabbed my brush, and proceeded to put my hair up... I was told it was inappropriate and that I shouldn't do those things at work, ever.

I work in a call center. I was at my desk.

Mind you - I don't care about other people's... droppings. I brush them off/away/etc. I also flush unflushed toilets in public bathrooms.


That's a little ridiculous! I work in a call center environment too and I have always had a lot of hair that I wore down. It used to be straight, now I wear it curly so I don't comb it. But when it was straight I always combed it at work at my desk. Even now I am always playing with it, twirling curls around my finger. Other people with shorter straight hair do it so if someone said something to me....well lets say I wouldn't be nice about it!!lol I'm not around food or anything so...

[Addy]

I don't brush or comb after I initially comb in the morning to go out. I will however re-adjust my bun, braid or whatnot if it's loose or scraggly.

I don't believe it's rude at all if someone is combing or brushing in their own personal space away from others as long as they're not doing it near food or up on someone else that may take offense.

I'd rather see someone care for their hair and appearance than to see someone walk around with a rat's nest. JMPO. ;) :D

[Armelle]

Alright y'all, *laughs*. After a handful of you have mentioned the attention and vanity thing...perhaps I AM just an attention whore! Ok, I'm so joking. :D I do not, nor have I ever carried a brush around with me to preen my hair.

I really agree with Morrighan's analogy of brushing your hair in public to tying your shoes when needed.

[Ramona_Fosca]

I don't brush in public.
I don't apply or fix my make up in public.
I don't pick my teeth in public.
I don't floss in public.
I don't burp in public.
I don't clip my nails in public.
I don't french kiss in public.
I don't undress in public.

I could probably continue for (p)ages listing things I do not do in public. Most of them are perfectly normal things to do and there really is no "logical" reason not to do so in public but that it might offend other people.

Hey, who cares if I floss a little if there is nobody eating close-by? Well, I do. I would not want my colleague to floss where I can see it. And while I might enjoy seeing beautiful hair brushed I allow for the fact that somebody might not.

I am not conservative at all (more of a left winged liberal, actually) and a feminist for sure, so I do not think this is some old fashioned, sexist or otherwise outdated decorum.

But this might be one of the many differences between "Old Europe" and the US...

[eresh]

If my braid needs to be redone ... I'll just do it.
I don't care where it is, as long as it isn't in the centre of attention (not because of the hair but because I don't like to be in the centre of attention)
At the animalshelter where I work nobody cares, shedhair there all over the place usually so what's a few extra :p
I also fingercomb and rebraid in the train.

We did get comments not to "do that" (try hairtoys and bun our hair) at a hairmeeting, in a cafe.
While a little bit further along there was a lady with a small dog in her lap at the table...why is that okay and bunning hair isn't?

Brushing hair in public doesn't bother me, it isn't gross or rude imho.


Edit: About the teethpicking and other public grooming things:
... a lot of restaurants here actually provide you with toothpicks when you are done with your meal.
It's normal to use them in public. Why else would they provide them.

When I need to blow my nose I blow my nose.
That's better than to "suck it in" 100 times in public.(imho)
When I feel I need it, I will apply deoderant in public.
I mean, these things we all do, why hide it, we're all human aren't we.

[Lady Godiva]

I'm OK with public grooming as long as it's in a place where there's no chance of the (inevitably) shed hair drifting onto me. :lol:

I wouldn't brush my hair on a train, for instance, just as I wouldn't spit out sunflower seeds on the floor. I just don't want to contribute to the general layer of things on the ground or floor. It's a question of being tidy, not of being old fashioned or not.
I lean in this direction, in-between the extremes. It's simply a matter of courtesy not to presume that bodily leftovers shouldn't bother anyone else or sicken them. In high school, one of my math teachers kept her classroom open at lunchtime so she could tutor students, but at the beginning of the year, she made it clear that she ate lunch then, too, and hair combing was not allowed at any time in her classroom, because it made her physically sick to find shed hair near her food. Fair enough; she was giving extra, so we could give in return.

That's the event that made a difference to me. I was not instructed by parents (or anyone else) who lectured or even suggested that basic grooming in public was rude, as in breaking a rule of propriety. Hence, I have no problem with it and at times will do so, myself. However, I would never stand in a restaurant, cafe, buffet, bar or grocery store detangling my hair. I'm not so important as to allow my shed strands to land on others, so I try to find an out-of-the-way location such as restroom or building corner if my hair stick or Ficcare slips out, and I do just a quick re-do, not an all-out detangle.

Really, there's little difference between leaving long hair loose and combing it. It's just a small difference, unless you just washed it and are doing a post-shampoo detangle. Otherwise, either way, strands are going to escape. I don't have a problem with finding the occasional strand, but finding a scattering or cluster of cast-off hair under a restaurant table or on a cafe chair would make me wonder about the person who left it there. It suggests someone unwilling to gather and dispose of his/her own bodily leavings. So it's simply a matter of cleaning up after one's self, as well as being courteous of people around us. After all, how many of us enjoy finding hair in our food?

[florenonite]

I don't have a problem with people discreetly detangling in public, but if they're making an exhibition of it it would strike me as rude and show-offy. If my hair's down, I run my fingers through it a lot to keep it from tangling and out of my way. If I go out with it down and it's windy, I braid it while I'm walking so it doesn't get tangled. If it falls out of its bun, I redo it. If it's down I often bun it and braid it without thinking about it (I'm a notorious fiddler), and if it's hot I'll put it up. I also apply lip balm in public if my lips are chapped, and if I have hand cream available I'd put it on, too. IMO all these things (with the exception of the fiddling with my hair, but that's no worse than my nail-biting or zipper-faffing, etc., all of which I need to stop) are simple things that everyone does, so why shouldn't people see you do it?

Of course, I have yet to work out why men and women have separate bathrooms when there's individual stalls already (I know men's bathrooms have urinals, too, but wouldn't it be easier just to make one room with more stalls and no urinals?), so maybe it's a case of I really don't have a problem with seeing people do "private" things.

I do draw the line at full detangling session or full make-up application in public, because those seem too much like vanity than simply fixing one's hair. I also think it's rude to focus too much on one's hair whilst in a social situation, though touching it while talking I don't consider to be rude.

Of course, I also don't like people playing with their hair around food, but that goes without saying, really.

[freckles]

I will comb or fix my hair in public, but not in restaurants or cafes or etc (the one exception being if I am wearing my hair down, I will quickly put it into a ponytail or bun before my food arrives sometimes), and not close to strangers or people I don't know well. I see other people doing it too, and it's never bothered me.

[teela1978]

To me, changing your hairstyle (fixing a bun, re-braiding) in a public setting is okay. Most people won't have a problem with someone twisting their hair up real quick. Brushing/combing in my opinion should be done either outside or in a bathroom, mainly because of the shed factor. A good combing will get me 10-20 hairs... and that's a good volume of hair if it's past BSL. Kinda icky to have that falling onto the floor while you're talking with your friends. Plus some poor janitor has to go clean it up later.

[Jason]

(That's the one thing that always drove me nuts about Dr. Quinn and my attempts to imitate her hairstyles. He hair never really looked disheveled from daily work. I don't have the luxury of shot cuts!):violin:

Admiring her hair and its various styles was one of things I loved most about that show. I never really thought about it but you're right, her hair almost always looked perfect and not disheveled even when she was working.

I don't have a problem with brushing or otherwise attending to hair in public so long as it's not around food.

[AJoifulNoise]

I don't really care where people groom themselves, provided it's not over my food. However, I am not comfortable grooming in most public places. My exceptions are outside (where any hairs I lose track of can blow away) and in restrooms. I don't think I was ever taught this... But, that's how I feel.

[missbexy]

[quote=Armelle;769712]One of my co-workers asked if I could brush it upside downquote]
I've been asked to do that a few times and I have nowhere near as much hair as you. I think i've also done it a couple of times to amuse my little godson.

[Honey39]

See, my personal total dislike is people brushing/combing their hair on the bus going to work. I don't care about the public aspect, it's just the idea of being trapped next to someone doing their grooming rituals makes me feel grossed out. I once told someone who was clipping her nails on the bus to stop doing that (the little pieces were landing on me).

I suppose it's courtesy - I don't want anyone's bodily effluvia (dandruff, snot, nail clippings) ON me. It's the dandruff aspect of hair that makes me feel grossed out, I think. I just feel like bits of scalp and product are being dusted over me if someone sitting next to me on a packed bus is brushing out their hair.

[wintersun99]

..............

[pdy2kn6]

They must of been amazed by your hair. I personally don't mind it if people chose to do a quick brush in public, although what I was abit taken back by was once when I was on holiday in San Fransisco, we were in a department store and I saw one old lady pick up a brush from the shelf, start brushing her hair, and then threw it back into the other brushes. I don't think I would be too keen on a 'used' brush. It was funny but a bit disgusting, lol.

[florenonite]

They must of been amazed by your hair. I personally don't mind it if people chose to do a quick brush in public, although what I was abit taken back by was once when I was on holiday in San Fransisco, we were in a department store and I saw one old lady pick up a brush from the shelf, start brushing her hair, and then threw it back into the other brushes. I don't think I would be too keen on a 'used' brush. It was funny but a bit disgusting, lol.

Eww, that's gross.

When I got my Tangle Teezer a couple of my flatmates tried it out because they thought it was really cool. I was ok with them using my brush because they're my friends, but using a brush and then putting it back to be bought by someone else is gross.

[nowxisxforever]

I got spoken to at work once.... I was sweating to DEATH and had to put my hair up. So I grabbed my brush, and proceeded to put my hair up... I was told it was inappropriate and that I shouldn't do those things at work, ever.

I work in a call center. I was at my desk.

Mind you - I don't care about other people's... droppings. I brush them off/away/etc. I also flush unflushed toilets in public bathrooms.

How special! I also work in a call center, though admittedly one of our most casual sites (they tried to have us business casual...and gave up because none of us would follow it, which may have more to do with it being Oregon than anything!) and I can do pretty much whatever I want. I comb my hair when it's not a greasy day at my desk, I will put my hair up at my desk, hell-- I will go get my hair wet in the showers in one of the bathrooms when the A/C isn't able to keep up with the temperature outside and sit with it down at my desk while wet. My coworkers will also let (or ask me to) put their hair up or in a braid for them.

I've gotten nothing but positive comments.

[Yvonne]

I get funny looks when I brush it out a my desk! I try to get to the ladies room if I can. Pet peeve for me is finding lengthly strands of hair my car. Natural shedding cannot be avoided, but I do try not to brush it there either.

[Snakecharm]

Honestly? I mess with my hair as I need to and don't really worry about it. Not, mind you, in a restaurant or eating area. But I keep a brush at my desk and will brush it out and/or put it up without much thought.

I am one of only two chicas on a team of technicians, however, so the boyos mainly look at my hair with either fascination or mild interest.

[JamieLeigh]

I would not want someone to brush his/her hair in an area where I and others enjoy food and drink, so I would not do this either. I would much rather brush where there is a mirror anyway, so that usually means a bathroom, if I'm away from home. I think it's a case of "do unto others as you would have others do unto you."

[Gingevere]

Sometimes I comb or brush my hair in the common area of my dorm. I don't think anyone is bothered by it... my friends just chuckle and let me indulge in my hair vanity. :D

[Arashi]

Apparently I'm strange in that when I comb my hair, I don't leave piles of hair behind when I'm done? Not when I had hair down to my hips, and not now (about BSL).

The most I'll shed during a quick combing is 3-5 hairs, and even those get trapped in the teeth of the comb. I'd be extremely concerned if combing my hair resulted in my sheds getting all over people several feet away, or piles of hair being left behind. :neutral:

I guess some just shed more that others. :ponder:

[OhioLisa]

I don't brush in public.
I don't apply or fix my make up in public.
I don't pick my teeth in public.
I don't floss in public.
I don't burp in public.
I don't clip my nails in public.
I don't french kiss in public.
I don't undress in public.

I could probably continue for (p)ages listing things I do not do in public. Most of them are perfectly normal things to do and there really is no "logical" reason not to do so in public but that it might offend other people.

Hey, who cares if I floss a little if there is nobody eating close-by? Well, I do. I would not want my colleague to floss where I can see it. And while I might enjoy seeing beautiful hair brushed I allow for the fact that somebody might not.


EXACTLY!!!!!

[slz]

It's supposed to be (..) sexually suggestive.

I think it's the only post where I saw it mentioned, but I do feel it is. Maybe it's depends on the length but I do feel combing in public is somehow a "sexy" thing to do. I try not to do it unless this kind of attention doesn't bother me at this moment. I know it might not be the case for everyone, but to many people (me included) hair is a body part quite heavily sexualized.
Kinda like when I wear over the knee socks : pulling them up is a bit too sexy an act to be carried out thoughtlessly in public.

So for those of you who don't think of it this way, it doesn't mean people watching you comb have the same point of view :D .

And this makes me think : that's maybe one of the reasons it seems (from what some have said here) teenage girls tend to play with their hair / comb it in class or at school / etc : at this age there's a lot of play with this kind of inuendos - testing your sexiness, pretending you don't, etc (you know, teenage hormones :rolleyes: ). In any case, as a teacher of teen aged students I will never allow any student to comb in class. Suggestive things don't belong there.

[basak]

When I need to blow my nose I blow my nose.
That's better than to "suck it in" 100 times in public.(imho)
When I feel I need it, I will apply deoderant in public.
I mean, these things we all do, why hide it, we're all human aren't we.


This is exactly what I was thinking. I mean, I was also thought not to groom myself in public, as with anyone else, and I probably wouldn't do the more in-depth grooming types in public. But we all do it, so it doesn't really make sense to actively hide or be embarrassed by what you have to do. It's not some great big secret that my nose produces mucus! LOL, but yeah, I do poop rainbows and sunshine. Anything else would be unladylike ;););););) :silly:

[Sissy]

I was brought up that it is very rude to brush your hair or otherwise groom in public. But that etiquette may have changed now.

Yes, my Mom and my Aunt brought to my attention how rude it is to brush your hair in a kitchen or food area when I was a kid. I had not realised it before then but never have done it since then.

[teela1978]

Apparently I'm strange in that when I comb my hair, I don't leave piles of hair behind when I'm done? Not when I had hair down to my hips, and not now (about BSL).

The most I'll shed during a quick combing is 3-5 hairs, and even those get trapped in the teeth of the comb. I'd be extremely concerned if combing my hair resulted in my sheds getting all over people several feet away, or piles of hair being left behind. :neutral:

I guess some just shed more that others. :ponder:



Perhaps my comb is wider toothed than yours. My shed hairs (usually 3-5, like you) fall straight to the ground... and I'd be a little grossed out by a little pile of someone else's hairs on the floor. If I take 5 hairs and mash them together I get a pretty decent little hair ball. Not a nice thing to leave around the office in my opinion.

Maybe you're better at catching them? Or you don't realize you're leaving them behind for others?

[Beatnik Guy]

I know it might not be the case for everyone, but to many people (me included) hair is a body part quite heavily sexualized.

Uh huh. :agree:

[longhairedfairy]

I personally wouldn't groom in public, but I don't think you should worry too much about their reaction. They were probably just staring/surprised at how pretty your hair is. :)

[JCFantasy23]

Actually, I never thought of brushing in public is a bad thing until I read some discussions here and on LJ about how it's not appropriate. I've seen a lot of girls brush their hair in public - then again, I don't ever remember seeing anyone with hair longer than BSL do that. Maybe it's more acceptable if your hair is not that long? I wouldn't know.

I try to avoid that mainly because of people's reactions here, I personally don't find it gross. I also don't want to do that because that'd make me feel like people would think that I'm just trying to make a big show out of my hair - what do you mean I'm paranoid?


Maybe it's just where you're living. I've never heard of any of this either. Never taught it was rude and never heard of an issue with it happening. The kitchen and any eating areas I can understand for common reasons, but just common hang out areas? I dont see how it's rude really, but respect those that do.

[Dreamernz]

Lol I do it everywhere and anywhere, people are mostly used to it now at school and I don't really care what others think as long as I'm not bothering them or leaving shed hairs (I comb very carefully in public, mostly do it on public transport :D). If you see a girl whipping out a bottle of conditioner spray and comb...its probably me :D It calms me down, it's like my version of reading a newspaper on the train :D BTW unrelated but I also love Aang and feel that the entire series is brilliant :D

[Fractalsofhair]

I think they were surprised at your hair length. 33 inches is waist on me. They probably had never seen really long hair brushed in public! I've been told it's rude to brush your hair AT the table while eating, but other than that it's fine, as is reading.

[chloeishere]

Well jeepers. I hitch up my pants in public if they are falling down. I figure it's worse to have my butt hanging out than it is to pull up my pants.

I comb my hair everyday while I'm in my car, at stop lights. It reduces road rage for me, because I feel like I'm utilizing my time.
If I don't hit a lot of stop lights, or I'm running late, I'll comb in class, and then put it up. I keep my sheds away from people, of course.

If my bun is going to come down, I take it down, smooth out my hair, and put it back up. If I'm eating or with someone eating, I won't fluff it back out first, or comb, just down and back up, so I don't have any loose hairs coming out.

I'm a pretty polite person, but I don't think someone combing their hair is being rude. If anything, they are trying to display good hygiene!

Just my two cents. Common courtesy is not about archaic rules, in my opinion.

[Bene]

I think it's ruder to take up public bathroom space to flounce and groom in front of a mirror while there are people waiting to wash their hands.


As for grooming in public, I wasn't specifically taught that it was rude or anything, but it seems like one of those social cues you pick up while growing up. I personally don't care if other people decide to brush or comb in public, but I won't do it. I may, on occasion, quickly adjust my bun, but that takes about 10 seconds and I only do it if I'm out of the way.

[82exoticbeauty]

I don't even groom my hair in public! I'd probably notice if hair will be on the food I eat or somewhere! So I'd stick to combing/brushing my hair inside my car, my boyfriend's car, and parents car before walking outside! Washing hands/Using a hand sanitizer after combing/brushing hair before eating!