View Full Version : Hair for Funeral...?

March 9th, 2008, 02:49 PM
I'm going to a funeral after easter (old lady, not too close emotionally to me but to my mother) and I want to "dress up" as a sign for respect. I'm probably going to wear dress pants, a long sleaved shirt and a jacket (in toned down colours), but what to do with my hair..?

March 9th, 2008, 02:52 PM
I would do a simple updo. I think the knot in your avatar is lovely!

March 9th, 2008, 02:54 PM
I'd say probably a very simple bun worn on the low side without a whole lot of sparkly decorative hairtoys. Just something quiet, demure and respectful that doesn't draw a lot of attention to itself.

March 9th, 2008, 02:55 PM
As simple as possible and with simple hair toys as well, nothing fancy, that usually works best. A cinnamon bun, a braided bun held with only invisible pins or similar, would probably be my choice.

Koala Kim
March 9th, 2008, 03:03 PM
I agree with everyone else; simple is best in this instance.
Keep accessories to a minimum. Nothing flashy or sparkly.
Understated is always best for an occasion like this. :flower:

March 9th, 2008, 03:10 PM
I personally don't think accessories would be appropriate. I would just pin it.

March 9th, 2008, 03:11 PM
The last funeral I went to, (my husbands fathers) I wore my hair in a french twist held with a black fakarre. I think french twists are a very dressed up yet low key hairstyle. It seemed to work out.

March 9th, 2008, 03:16 PM
I would suggest a french twist as others have said.

March 9th, 2008, 03:26 PM
As several others have said, I'd suggest a French twist. You also might do a low knot of some kind, or maybe a pinned-under French braid. I'd say use either hairpins or a simple hair toy, like a plain fork/stick or dark clip.

I also don't know how long your hair is, but even some kind of nape-of-the-neck braided bun (using, as said, a plain stick or fork or clip or perhaps pins) would also be appropriate, to my mind.


March 9th, 2008, 03:34 PM
Any bun without fancy sparkling toys will do, I think. The easier the better... maybe a sleek sock bun or a cinnamon bun? Or an infinity bun - would be a nice symbol, even if no one else will notice ;)
Best would be if itīs secured invisible, or with a dark wooden fork/stick without too much carving or other decoration on.

Braided buns are lovely and classical but Iīm not sure if itīs good to wear them at a funeral. They often lead into a conversation about hairstyling, maybe because they are a rare sight around here... not sure how thatīs in your area. But when I wear a braided bun itīs attracting interest, while a cinnamon for example is completely ignored most of the time. Just something to consider :)

March 9th, 2008, 05:58 PM
Are you wearing a hat or scarf? That tends to make my hair dressing decision for me at events like these.
Personally I'd wear a french plait or simply tie it back in a pony tail, simplicity and neatness being the key.

March 9th, 2008, 06:42 PM
I would go with a low cinnamon bun or any sort of a very simple bun fastened just with pins.

March 9th, 2008, 07:02 PM
The character of Connie in Godfather III had a nice low braided bun style that would be appropriate.. here's a link:
http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/9/9a/Connie_corleone.jpg&imgrefurl=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/index.html%3Fcurid%3D8177776&h=399&w=365&sz=32&hl=en&start=11&tbnid=Q8B7tuux_7UtcM:&tbnh=124&tbnw=113&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dgodfather%2B3%2Bconnie%26gbv%3D2%26nd sp%3D20%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN

March 10th, 2008, 09:17 AM
I recently attended two funerals (my grandfather and my grandfather-in-law). In both occasions I was expected to dress formal, not neccesarily black. For both I chose the same outfit and hairdo. I wore black skirt and jacket with dark blue top and wore my hair in a logroll with a ficcare (jeans maxima). Wearing all black would for me be very unreal. The blue made it for me much more wearable and looked quite distinguished.

March 10th, 2008, 11:18 AM
I'd probably go with a low bun held with pins or a low-key hairstick, or maybe just wear a simple french braid. I don't think it's inappropriate to dress it up a little bit, as long as you're not drawing undue attention to yourself. After all, you're looking nice as a sign of respect for her.

March 10th, 2008, 11:39 AM
A very low key/simple bun with invisible hardware if possible.

July 9th, 2011, 07:09 AM
I'm just bumping this thread as a reminder to plan ahead for this kind of thing. I am going to a funeral today and while I didn't have trouble deciding on a bun, I have a problem securing it. A hairstick is my go-to secure bun tool, but they are so unusual around here that I think it draws too much attention. Mini jaw clips are my next most secure tools- too casual. My other tools are big conspicuous forks- no.

And so I have 6 or so bobby pins in, which I don't think are secure at all.

I went with a rose bun placed low so I could start out with an elastic. That is some hold, anyway. If my hair spits out the bobby pins, like I have known it to do, I will be wearing a rope braid.

And while I am bumping this thread, I'll just throw in a reminder to check your closet for funeral attire. You just don't know when these events are coming. I lost 50 pounds over the last year, so I am wearing a dress at least two sizes too large since I've been putting off clothes shopping because my size keeps changing. Even my husband can't figure out what to wear because he doesn't seem to have a shirt and tie for his rarely worn suit.

July 9th, 2011, 07:45 AM
I have a soft spot for bumped threads :)

I know this is hard for hair people to imagine, but hairtoys in the real world really don't draw that much attention :laugh:

A bun, any bun, is suitable for a funeral. The accessory, as long as it's not singing and flashing, isn't going to disrupt a funeral. As long as it goes with what you're wearing, it's fine. It's like clothes. In general, you don't wear bright pink tubetops and hotpants to funerals. You don't wear the equivalent in your hair. The extra rules, about them drawing attention? Well, it's like the girl with the zit who thinks everyone is staring at her, and the truth is no one even notices.

I've worn ficcares, wood forks, and dangly foo-foo sticks to funerals. The only time anyone ever said anything was when the deceased's elderly mother was chatting me up and after giving me the low-down on family gossip, she daid "That's a nice hair... Fastener? Are those sticks actually holding your hair up? I've never seen that" Aside from that, if anyone even noticed, it wasn't worth mentioning, thus not disrupting the services.

July 9th, 2011, 08:27 AM
At my fathers funeral i wore my hair in a braided bun with a flexi. It didn't look to flashy.

July 9th, 2011, 09:17 AM
A non-singing, non-dancing hairstick would seem fine to me. Personally, at funerals I tend to see relatives I don't often see, so having a neutral topic of conversation (as in Bene's "nice hair... Fastener?..." experience) for the meet-and-greet parts of the event could be a plus. Generally nobody comments on my sticks though.

That said, checking my updo log I see that when I went to a friend's funeral last month, I wore a double braided bun secured with GHD pins. The lack of a hairstick owed more to the fact that the updo didn't have to fit under my bike helmet (much as I love the double braided bun, it does have that one teensy flaw) than anything else.

July 9th, 2011, 09:25 AM
A french braid is my choice for nice and discret up do. It is easy and you dont need more than 4 bobby pins.
A low cinnamom is easy and nice as well, but if you have some dark colored hair toys I don't see any problem at all.