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birthmarkie
August 29th, 2009, 09:17 PM
I'm wondering how to handle these sorts of statements, which I seem to be getting more of recently. I can't decide if it's good or bad. I met someone I hadn't seen in a while and she said my hair had gotten really long. She was dead serious about it, like she was making an observation of a strict fact. I'm not sure if it was awe or what, but it certainly wasn't a compliment. (There was no, "I like it" or "it's nice" follow-up.)

How do you handle these situations? Here, on LHC, if someone said, "wow, your has gotten so long," I would take it as a compliment. But in the real world, it doesn't quite work the same way, so I feel awkward saying "thanks." Am I over-analyzing it? Should I just accept it as a compliment no matter how it was intended? Should I be honest and say "yes, I like it long"? Am I just not "owning" my hair length? I do feel a bit hair-rexic at times since I haven't reached my ultimate goal...

How do you handle the "your hair is long" statement?

Roseate
August 29th, 2009, 09:24 PM
I love to hear it, regardless of how it's intended- I want my hair to be long, so if someone thinks it is, I'm happy!

I usually just say something like "Yes, it is getting pretty long, isn't it" to the people who simply state it like a fact. If if sounds more complimentary I'll say thanks. I usually go on to another subject then, unless it's a friend who I know is into hair-talk.

Indigo Girl
August 29th, 2009, 09:27 PM
Wow, what a coincidence! I just got that comment this morning picking up a moving truck. My hair was heavily oiled in a braid.

I too can't tell if it's supposed to be a compliment or not, but I always say Thank You anyways. :shrug:

Elphie
August 29th, 2009, 09:29 PM
I usually just grin and say "yes, it is!" I don't care how they intend it. Either I've never had anyone comment that I doubted their sincerity or I don't take notice of it much.

nowxisxforever
August 29th, 2009, 09:29 PM
I usually just say "Mhm!!" or "Yup!!" in a really pleased-sounding tone of voice.

spidermom
August 29th, 2009, 09:32 PM
The last time I heard this, I believe I said something like "that's exactly how I want it; thanks for noticing."

keight425
August 29th, 2009, 09:47 PM
I get comments like that ALL the time, like ALL the time. It's weird because my hair does not grow that fast but people at work (I work at a pretty large hospital) say it a LOT. I think the main reason is for some of them.. the nurses they are on a different work schedule than I am, so hypothetically it may be like 2-3 weeks before they see me wearing my hair down in a somewhat straight fashion again (I wear it down like 40% of the time, and then adjusting for their schedule vs. my schedule and then the fact that sometimes I wear it curly so then it's shorter.... you get the idea)

Anyhow... so all that adds up to different people telling me "Your hair is getting so long" several times a week it gets kind of old, especially since it's in varying tones of "I sort of think it looks ok --->You need to cut it, but I'm not going to say that"
Most of the time I'm just like "Yeah, it sure is"
Finally someone had the courage to ask me if I was going to cut it and I was just like "No, I think I'm just kinda see what happens" because yall know if I was to be like "I want to grow it out to my waist/tailbone/etc" (My personal goal is waist) then they would look at me like I had 3 eyes.

RavennaNight
August 29th, 2009, 09:50 PM
See, I get the "Your hair got so long!" all the time. Who says you cannot accept it as a compliment from people. Who cares how they meant it. I don't care how they meant it. When they say it, I am always like "Oh thank you so much!" and beam happily at them. And I am sincere about it, not sarcastic. I don't care what they think. Thanks for noticing. I'm happy about it. That's that. If they meant it negatively, my beaming at them disarms them anyway.

I think it also has to do with how confident or self-consious someone is about such a thing. And how one perceives the intentions and ideas of others to be. If you feel people are bringing it to your attention negatively, it is because that is how you are taking it. I'm not saying the people who tell you it's long and decide to bingo you about getting a haircut. I mean the people who just make the simple observation that your hair got long.

I realized this psychological thingy when I was working as an assistant manager last year. Various staff would come up to me and complain "Nobody in this place does 'x.' ". If I just agreed with them about it and let them vent, all would be well and I was viewed as the confident one. I have seen others approached about the same dilemma and they would take it personally, like the staff was complaining about them. "What do you mean nobody does 'x.' " And it would get turned around like that person is the one that doesn't do whatever it was.

This is similar in some ways. It is all in how you allow yourself to react. If you react positively, (because you know you want to anyway), they will react one way. If you react self-consciously/not confidently, they will pick up on it and dig in.

People are interesting. Try it. But be sincere. It works.

Kiraela
August 29th, 2009, 09:53 PM
My standard response is, "It's getting there!" with a smile.

kwaniesiam
August 29th, 2009, 10:27 PM
Another member suggested this a while ago on a thread similar to this. I believe it was something along the lines of shriek, gasp, and scream "Oh my god, how did that get there?!". I hope when my hair gets longer I have the opportunity to do this :lol:

Laylah
August 29th, 2009, 11:56 PM
When people say that, I just choose to take it as a compliment. I mean, if they give me the option to take it as a compliment or insult, why not take it in a way that makes me happy?

So a few days ago, I got the same comment- someone told me, "your hair is so long!", so I said thanks! :)

Sissy
August 30th, 2009, 12:10 AM
I usually just say, "oh geez, I know" and keep carrying on whatever convo we were having. I don't really make it a point to go on about it or how I feel about it or such.

Gumball
August 30th, 2009, 12:20 AM
I tend to say some sort of comeback, usually the default being, "Kinda yeah." It can be "Last time I checked," "Are you sure?" or even "Since when?" Usually the default kicks into gear since they're kind of right comparatively. Haha. The only certainty in life is that Captain Obvious will strike and strike again not long after the first time. We just have to be prepared to "err yeah" our way through each bout!

patience
August 30th, 2009, 12:24 AM
Usually I just answer with "almost" or "not yet" and a big smile. :D Then try to move on to another subject.

Melisande
August 30th, 2009, 01:18 AM
I get that comment, too, and I found a nice way of answering, albeit one that works only in German. I say, "und das ist gut so" - "and that's how it should be".

There is a German politician (mayor of Berlin) who is gay. When asked by a journalist whether he is gay, he answered "yes - and that's how it should be".

I used this answer twice and I think I'll use it more often. It makes people smile and is a friendly way of letting them know: ...and I don't care what you think about it!

yellowchariot
August 30th, 2009, 01:22 AM
I actually said that exact same statement to a girl that I kinda know at a local grocery store. I was checking out through her line, and I hadn't seen her in about a year. It was above her shoulders in short layers last year, but now her layers had grown out, and her over all length was slightly over BSL. When I saw her I said "Hey It's been a while since I last saw you, how are ya?" and then she said "I'm doing pretty good, how are you?" to which I replied "I'm doing ok, hey your hair has gotten long, cool *with a big grin*" So she smiled sand just said "Yeah, it has!"

But I didn't know what else to say, I think she engaged or married. So I didn't drag the conversation out. Just simple small talk.

Heidi_234
August 30th, 2009, 01:25 AM
I would love to meet people I haven't seen in a long while and get the "your hair is/got so long" comment. Not that I need the conformation or anything, but that would definitely be a compliment in my book.

I do agree with taking it a compliment regardless what the person meant by saying it. For the most part, they probably don't even have opinion to here or there (not everybody is hair-crazy :silly: ), so pointing out that your hair is long is nothing but a plain neutral statement. Saying "Aha thanks" or "thank you" which isn't quite an answer either could cut it. For somebody you know is closer and more supportive you could say "I try my best", "Yeah I know, I love it" or something.

And if they move on to "you should cut it" then there's whole thread dedicated to retort on comments of the sort. :twisted:

Jinx2234
August 30th, 2009, 01:31 AM
I haven't been able to find a good response for people telling me my hair is long. I usually just end up turning red and muttering something like "no it's not."

Loreley
August 30th, 2009, 01:45 AM
I often get comments, too. It's very interesting because people who know me (some of my relatives or neighbors) says "Your hair is so long. When will you cut it?" I always say "I won't. I've just started to grow it. " Then they look at me in a funny way. :p
Others, whom I don't know usually says how pretty my hair is and never to cut it. And they always ask wether it is naturally so wavy. I tell them it is. They look so amazed! :bull:

Wicked Princess
August 30th, 2009, 02:07 AM
I am always so torn when people say this to me. On one hand...I get it fairly often. However, after you hear it four times that week, it starts to get a bit annoying. Can't they at least say, "pretty braid" or "nice hair fork" or "oooh....ahhh...shiiiiiney"? Instead, they always comment on the length. I don't mind...it IS accurate, and it's an innocent enough statement.

I've always responded with pleased amusement. "Not long enough!" I'll say, smiling. Or something along the same lines. It may not be true but...I like to think of my hair as STUNNING! Stunning enough that the only thing people can say is, "Wow...long!" like a child identifying something they've heard about but haven't seen yet.

What can I say? I like my interpretations of the world to follow the side that strokes my ego the most. *cough*

vampodrama
August 30th, 2009, 03:24 AM
I've been a short-haired person my entire life so far and I get this comment a lot. It's kinda amazing how a simple statement can be told in so many different ways... I have heard the emotions of this statement vary from awe to disgust.

I personally don't like that comment so much. It says absolutely nothing. I mean, yes, people are noticing that my hair has gotten longer, but dude, it's kinda obvious, isn't it? Tell me something I don't know - tell me my hair looks pretty or that you like it or whatever. If you want to give a compliment, then give it. Stating that my hair is long isn't a compliment - I know it's long(er).

So I usually respond with a dry "Yeah it has a tendency to grow". Maybe I'm overly bitter and should loosen up, but it really rubs me a totally wrong way...

BunnyBee
August 30th, 2009, 05:54 AM
I want someone to say this to me :( It's nice to think that people notice.. trouble is I hardly ever wear my hair down in public lol

Take it as a compliment, it would be worse if no one ever noticed that your hair was getting longer :p

Little_Bird
August 30th, 2009, 08:58 AM
When people say "your hair is so long", the best thing to answer is "thank you!"

;)

hmmm
August 30th, 2009, 09:10 AM
Where I live, in India, almost all women have long hair (shoulder length or more). Mine is really short according to their standards, and I often get comments like "Your hair is so short now!" and it's not complimentary either, they like long hair regardless of whether its well maintained or not. (I'd cut it because of a bad dye job.)
I personally hate all the comments in that vein, and I'm often rude about them. Not to the person but more in reference to the comment. Like once, I told this girl that I hadn't really cut it, that it was growing inwards. She got the point and moved on.

jhator
August 30th, 2009, 09:31 AM
I've blurted out 'you're so tall!' to someone before. Clearly he was aware of his height and I was pretty embarrassed about stating the obvious afterwards. It's just that, as soon as I saw him my brain disconnected and the words fell out of my mouth. Luckilly he was used to it and it didn't bother him :)

I think it's the same with long hair. It's unusual and so it's striking. I'd take it as a compliment because at least you're standing out from the crowd.

TheEndlessOcean
August 30th, 2009, 02:02 PM
I've blurted out 'you're so tall!' to someone before. Clearly he was aware of his height and I was pretty embarrassed about stating the obvious afterwards. It's just that, as soon as I saw him my brain disconnected and the words fell out of my mouth. Luckilly he was used to it and it didn't bother him :)

I think it's the same with long hair. It's unusual and so it's striking. I'd take it as a compliment because at least you're standing out from the crowd.

Being 6'7", I can assure you that that happens all the time :). My hair is quite long for male standards, but I get far more comments on my height than I ever have on my hair.

Anje
August 30th, 2009, 02:22 PM
I get that one a lot. I usually just say "thanks", but I think I may need to adopt "not yet", if only for the weird looks it could generate.

GlassEyes
August 30th, 2009, 03:17 PM
Another member suggested this a while ago on a thread similar to this. I believe it was something along the lines of shriek, gasp, and scream "Oh my god, how did that get there?!". I hope when my hair gets longer I have the opportunity to do this :lol:
Doing this.

The funny thing is, people have started to say this when my hair is down and curly--when it's barely past chin, sometimes touching shoulder. I'd hate for them to see me when I take down a damp/wet bun--I did that a few weeks ago in front of my friends at Wendy's, and one of them (this friend I hadn't seen in a year, almost two) literally had their eyes bug out of their head. "OH MY GOD YOUR HAIR IS SO LONG! O_O"

It was funny, but she meant it in a positive way, I think. :p

SimplyViki
August 30th, 2009, 03:23 PM
Pre-LHC, it would've never occurred to me that it would be anything other than a compliment. And I love compliments, so my automatic response is "Thank you!" or sometimes "Yup!", in a cheery tone of voice.

Now I'll still give my automatic response, but I'll sometimes wonder afterwards if it was intended as a compliment or not. :shrug: At least they know how I feel about it now!

Susana
August 30th, 2009, 03:28 PM
I want my hair to be long so I take it as a compliment and say "Thank you" with a smile:)

jel
August 30th, 2009, 03:36 PM
"Yes, isn't it?" :D :D "And it's going to get even longer!" :D

nowxisxforever
August 30th, 2009, 03:39 PM
I've blurted out 'you're so tall!' to someone before. Clearly he was aware of his height and I was pretty embarrassed about stating the obvious afterwards. It's just that, as soon as I saw him my brain disconnected and the words fell out of my mouth. Luckilly he was used to it and it didn't bother him :)

I think it's the same with long hair. It's unusual and so it's striking. I'd take it as a compliment because at least you're standing out from the crowd.

I say this to people a lot.

Usually their response is "You're so short!" :wigtongue

GlassEyes
August 30th, 2009, 04:49 PM
XD That make s a strange thought pop into my head. What if people did that with people they're attracted to?

Just think, you're walking down the street and...

"OH MY GOD YOU'RE SO HOT!!!!!!111111!!!!!11!!"

I think I'd be scared.

tangocurl
August 30th, 2009, 04:57 PM
Hey, everybody. I was reading this thread and had to point out to everyone:

OMG, our hair is SO LONG! :beerchug::cheer::hifive:

Tangles
August 30th, 2009, 05:02 PM
The last time I heard this, I believe I said something like "that's exactly how I want it; thanks for noticing."

Good response. I don't consider myself an easily peeved person but the "factual statement of hair length" thing annoys me a lot--it's so awkward!

LadyLongLocks
August 30th, 2009, 05:03 PM
I get that a lot! It used to annoy me if that is the ONLY thing they say about my hair.
Well after so many years you just brush it off:p
I think it is the only thing some people can say in a state of slight ShOcK.
Personally, I rather have that comment than the Locks of Love one where I have to go into the "Why I will never donate my hair speech".

Take it as a compliment!:) wooo hooo!!!:cheese:

Finoriel
August 30th, 2009, 05:07 PM
It depends on my mood :gabigrin: my reaction to such a statement can be anything from:

- Thanks :).
- I know :agree:.
- Really? *take hair/braid in front of me and look at it surprised* Yeah, somehow I had no time to trim it during the last 8 years I guess... :knuckle: maybe I should get a bath now, too. While I am at it. Christmas or no Christmas.

ipickee
August 30th, 2009, 05:11 PM
I'm a pretty blunt person so my answer is usually just a simple,"Yup. That's what I'm working at." Of course, most people who talk to me know me, and most people who know me accept me for what I am, so I guess my little world is pretty simple :).

Hatsumomo
August 30th, 2009, 05:16 PM
"And your shirt is <insert colour here>."

Monkey962
August 30th, 2009, 05:31 PM
"And your shirt is <insert colour here>."

Bahahahaha, I have to use that.:D

CaityBear
August 30th, 2009, 05:42 PM
I do the "Oh my gosh! I never even noticed!" when people say how short I am. lol Or if somebody says "Oh, I forgot how short you were!"

Anyway, usually even if they say it in a non-compliment way, I still like to hear it. I like it when people notice my hair is long. lol

Usually I just say something like "yeah, it is." or "yeah, it has grown a lot lately" or "Yup, but I still want it to get longer" or something like that.

RavennaNight
August 30th, 2009, 08:37 PM
If it is someone who hasn't seen me in a long time, And comments my hair got long, then I say "Yeah, it's been a while hasn't it? Time flies." And stare off thoughtfully about measures of time and sitting around watching grass (hair) grow.

going gray
August 30th, 2009, 09:19 PM
Simply look at them & smile.

HappyHair87
August 30th, 2009, 10:54 PM
I get this a lot too...most ppl that know me go "look at all that hair on your head!" and i say..."would you like some?" Lol!!

Or when they say the usual "your hair is so long" line....i swing it in that slow motion dramatic movie way....lol.

I love when ppl say this bc in my head...my hair is not long.

longhairedfairy
August 30th, 2009, 11:04 PM
Where I live, in India, almost all women have long hair (shoulder length or more). Mine is really short according to their standards, and I often get comments like "Your hair is so short now!" and it's not complimentary either, they like long hair regardless of whether its well maintained or not. (I'd cut it because of a bad dye job.)
I personally hate all the comments in that vein, and I'm often rude about them. Not to the person but more in reference to the comment. Like once, I told this girl that I hadn't really cut it, that it was growing inwards. She got the point and moved on.
Growing inwards! That's a great reply! :rollin:

Aisha25
August 30th, 2009, 11:11 PM
Where I live, in India, almost all women have long hair (shoulder length or more). Mine is really short according to their standards, and I often get comments like "Your hair is so short now!" and it's not complimentary either, they like long hair regardless of whether its well maintained or not. (I'd cut it because of a bad dye job.)
I personally hate all the comments in that vein, and I'm often rude about them. Not to the person but more in reference to the comment. Like once, I told this girl that I hadn't really cut it, that it was growing inwards. She got the point and moved on.
I have to admit I do the same thing as they said to you :o It happens in my family if someone cuts her hairs we say 'why you cut for" :bigeyes: you need to leave them alone and let them grow stupida" lol its just how we are, we're not used to short hairs unless from a guy.

Curlsgirl
August 31st, 2009, 08:24 AM
It honestly annoys me a lot too for some reason. I either say, "Yeah I guess it is" because I cannot say thank you when I have no idea if they mean it as a compliment or not. Sometimes I say, "Yep, you know how they tell you to cut your hair after 40, well I am in rebellion".

BlackfootHair
August 31st, 2009, 08:25 AM
I have to admit I do the same thing as they said to you :o It happens in my family if someone cuts her hairs we say 'why you cut for" :bigeyes: you need to leave them alone and let them grow stupida" lol its just how we are, we're not used to short hairs unless from a guy.

Lol...If I was surrounded by long hair in the family and seen someone with short hair, (and we spoke Spanish *you said stupida...unless the a was a typo*) I would totally blurt out, "Ay frijoles! Donde esta tu pelo?????!!???" (Ay, beans! Where is your hair????) :p

Aisha25
August 31st, 2009, 09:31 AM
Lol...If I was surrounded by long hair in the family and seen someone with short hair, (and we spoke Spanish *you said stupida...unless the a was a typo*) I would totally blurt out, "Ay frijoles! Donde esta tu pelo?????!!???" (Ay, beans! Where is your hair????) :p

Its how a certain Yemeni says stupid lol it rubbed off on me :D Well anyway (thanks for the translation cause I dont know that much spanish;) ) except I would add in "stupid girl you cut you hair and now crying its gone:angry: Go wash the dishes and your never allowed to touch your hair again :patrol:" yeah were strict about hair :draw:

Aww family there so loving when it comes to hair :cloud9: Lets hope I never have a girl :lol:

JamieLeigh
August 31st, 2009, 09:48 AM
I say, "It's been longer, and I'm still in the process of growing." Then they either insert a compliment, or tell me I need to donate it, or just smile and walk off. LOL.

LadyLongLocks
August 31st, 2009, 09:56 AM
"And your shirt is <insert colour here>."

I like this one! Simple and to the point....I will have to use this one!:p

merseaone
August 31st, 2009, 01:43 PM
I say " Thank you! I love long hair, don't you?"

RuthieAnne
August 31st, 2009, 02:08 PM
I always just say thank you, only occasionally will someone have something more to say. Other frequently asked question is, "How long does it take to wash?!?!" to which I reply, "Not long, but it takes forever to dry!" :-p

God bless,

~Ruthie

Fencai
August 31st, 2009, 02:19 PM
I agree with the others, and just say something like "yes it is! Im growing it out, thank you!" and make it as nice as I can and then change the subject if they seem to be in awe.

BUt I would take it as a compliment since that's your goal!

Melisande
August 31st, 2009, 04:34 PM
My husband's standard answer to remarks about his hair, when he was younger and had long hair (wow! your hair is long!), was: yeah, and there's even more where that came from...

He had wonderful curls growing in all directions... gone now...

Eireann
August 31st, 2009, 04:46 PM
I assume it's a compliment and I say "thanks!"

Botticelli Gold
August 31st, 2009, 09:24 PM
EDIT ~ Double post

Botticelli Gold
August 31st, 2009, 09:24 PM
I just say " Yes. Yes it is." :D I mean talk about stating the obvious right? lol!
Or, because I loooove my long hair, and love to be told, I might just say "Thanks!"
Depends on the tone used I guess.