Dye job killed all of my hair. Help you guys!!!

[myn]

Hi you guys. My name is Marni. i'm new. I have RIDICULOUSLY curly fine, thin, dry, mousey-brown hair that i straighten and highlight. VERY challenging! two years ago i finally grew out a fatal hair coloring after years of working on it and my hair was getting full and past my shoulder, when sure enough i changed hair stylists who destroyed my entire head of hair once again. it is all broken and straw-like, and i can't do anything with it. i never like to wear it up but i have no choice now. i'm SO sad. i am overwhelmed with all the amazing information on this site but it's a bit difficult as a newbie to navigate. where do i start????

i started a list of things to do when your hair is fried that i've distilled off the posts on this site. PLEASE if you have any advice or something to add i will owe you forever. i so so need your expertise! when the list is done i will recompile into an official list for all the others in the fried hair boat.

:)marni

1. style less often: i only style it once a week now and you can't even see the oil at that point i bet i could go a month without washing it before it started to look oily.
2. sleep with silk pillow
3. sleep with braid or bun
4. put coconut oil on the ends before bed
4. no cone conditioner
5. no protein shampoo
6. wear up as often as possible
7. shampoo bar? (what is this?)

[myn]

(ps. i don't chemically straighten i flat iron once a week)

[Nightshade]

Hey, Marni! Welcome to LHC!

There's an article on damaged hair linked under my siggy :) Why don't you start there? Inside it talks about what causes damage, how to prevent it, and how to rehabilitate damaged hair.

There's also links to a bunch of threads that as a new member you may find useful.

As someone who grew out a ton of damage, it can be done, best of luck :flowers:

[myn]

Just having someone get back to me on this makes my day! Thank you so much nightshade.

[Coriander]

Welcome, Myn :)

Nightshade has already suggested her wonderful article as well as the many links that will help you.

One thing I wanted to point out is that many people have lots of success using cone-free or sulfate-free products, however it's what your hair responds to best. Try using small trial-sized bottles of product until you find the one that your hair seems to love. This way you can save money and hassle in the long run :)

Personally, I had a lot of damage, mainly from coloring and old perms. I tried cone-free which didn't work for me, and I'm okay with that :)

Trial and error - but you will find what works best for you, I know it.

Welcome to LHC! I'm so happy you've found us :) :flowers:

[neon-dream]

Hi marni! I flat ironed my hair for 4 years daily, and I'm paying for it now. My hair is course though, and as yours is fine - maybe more damage has been caused to your hair because of this? Some hair just can't tolerate the flat irons at all, sadly! :(

[pilateschick7]

I included links to some really good articles by LHC members that I really found useful. It can really be information overload trying to take it all in, it does get better.

A silk or satin sleep cap might be a good alternative to a pillowcase. Sometimes those are expensive.

Commercial Shampoo contains SLS (sodium laurel sulfate) or other cleansers that can be rather harsh. Especially if you are a curly.

Shampoo bars are an alternative to shampoo. Hair that is chemically treated can be very porous so shampoo bars might not work well for them.
http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/vbjournal.php?do=article&articleid=4

Cowashing might be something to look into.
http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/vbjournal.php?do=article&articleid=18

Doing conditioning deep treatments might be something to add to your list. SMT or Fox's are very popular.

This is just a concept that I read recently..when you bleach hair you are blowing holes in it and need to do a protein deep treatment to fill in the holes.
http://livecurlylivefree.com/FAQs.htm
HTH

[myn]

omg!!!! I love you guys! this article nightshade is INCREDIBLE LIFECHANGING and AMAZING. thank you a million times. have any of you used the aubrey organics conditioner for swimming?

[ktani]

omg!!!! I love you guys! this article nightshade is INCREDIBLE LIFECHANGING and AMAZING. thank you a million times. have any of you used the aubrey organics conditioner for swimming?

Welcome to LHC!

Your list is pretty good! I would use coconut oil as more than just a bit on the ends. You can use it to deep treat as well. And you can use products with protein if you need them. Just see how your hair feels.

I think that you are on your way out of this. Take heart and try one thing at a time, so you can monitor results!

Shampoo bars are an alkaline, usually but not always, natural soap cleanser, that many people here like to use, followed by a vinegar rinse.

The Shampoo Bar thread (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=74)

[klcqtee]

Don't blow dry.
Comb gently.
Quit straightening (I don't care if you cut back to once a week, flat ironed hair is damaged hair)
Eat healthy.

Other than that, experiment with what works for your hair. Curlies often do well with a CWC. Try something for a few months, before giving up on it, otherwise your hair will just constantly be freaking out, trying to adjust to the new routine.

[myn]

awesome! thanks for those links you guys. amazing. i have been scouring the internet for months for info on this stuff and here it's all in one place. i've been doing that search and destroy cutting thing and you should see the cut now - such a short mess. thank g-d i have a nice boyfriend because it's NOT pretty. i just HAD to get it the worst of it off. it was more upsetting to see it every day. but curly hair is IMPOSSIBLE to grow out! it's going to take forever. any of you guys tried hair extensions? are there any possible non damaging ones out there? my girlfriend got so fed up with her difficult curls that she cut it all really short and got it straightened and added long wavy extentions. it looks - seriously- incredible. like movie star perfect hair. soooo tempting. but i don't have such guts.

[Coriander]

awesome! thanks for those links you guys. amazing. i have been scouring the internet for months for info on this stuff and here it's all in one place. i've been doing that search and destroy cutting thing and you should see the cut now - such a short mess. thank g-d i have a nice boyfriend because it's NOT pretty. i just HAD to get it the worst of it off. it was more upsetting to see it every day. but curly hair is IMPOSSIBLE to grow out! it's going to take forever. any of you guys tried hair extensions? are there any possible non damaging ones out there? my girlfriend got so fed up with her difficult curls that she cut it all really short and got it straightened and added long wavy extentions. it looks - seriously- incredible. like movie star perfect hair. soooo tempting. but i don't have such guts.

I know it's frustrating to grow out - have patience :) I cut my hair for boot camp in January 2004 (above shoulders), and then killed it with all kinds of coloring and hairspray afterwards.

Hair extensions, as far as I know, involve hot gluing the extensions to your own hair. Yikes! They also grow out funny, from what I've seen on fellow classmates. If you want the look of long hair immediately, I would honestly consider a wig. This way it's not damaging to your own hair and you could change it whenever you like.

Also, one of my classmates who received the extensions said that it was probably one of the biggest mistakes she'd made. I'm not saying that this happens with every person who gets extensions, but this girl said that it was more work to try to get these things to cooperate, plus her brush would snag in the glued sections and pull. Plus the money!!! Holy crow!

If you care for your hair and be gentle to it, I bet that once you get past the initial impatience of growing (we've all been there :) ), you'll see your lovely curls for what they are. Look through the posts here, and you will see many curlies that have glistening and well behaved hair! :flower:

[sedonia]

1. style less often: i only style it once a week now and you can't even see the oil at that point i bet i could go a month without washing it before it started to look oily.
2. sleep with silk pillow
3. sleep with braid or bun
4. put coconut oil on the ends before bed
4. no cone conditioner
5. no protein shampoo
6. wear up as often as possible
7. shampoo bar? (what is this?)


I don't think changing to a silk pillow does much to make up for flat ironing.

Also, going no cone may actually be worse for you if you are heat styling, since cone products offer at least some protection from these processes.

Personally, my hair becomes more fragile when I go no cone and use a shampoo bar.

[Nyghtingale]

Welcome to the family!

[Redheaded Raven]

Welcome to LHC Marni!

I used Snowymoons treatments to make my hair start behaving when I had damaged hair... If it wasn't in the article, but I think that it was, it is conditioner and honey and aloe vera gel and left on your hair. Great stuff! :inlove:

I think that some times wigs can be life savers to self esteem. And lots of fun!

[JennQ]

I'm not the expert that a lot of people here are, but I'll throw in my $.02:

Learn to work with your hair, not against it. If you have naturally curly hair, consider learning how to best bring out those gorgeous curls, and save the flat iron for a once-in-a-while hair-do.

As Sedonia said, cones will help protect your hair when you're heat-styling, so I wouldn't give them up completely! From what I understand, the point for most of us going no-cone is that we don't use shampoo, so the cones will build up and make our hair yucky. I CO most of the time, but if I'm going to be using heat on my hair, I switch to a cone conditioner and a cone-based shine spray to protect my hair, then shampoo in my next wash. I figure it will get more damaged from the heat than from shampooing just once to get the cones back out.

Above all, be nice to your hair, and try not to worry about it too much. If you over-stress about it, you're more likely to do something that you'll regret later. If you're having a bad hair day, you have plenty of support right here. ;)

Good luck!

[Roseate]

...
4. no cone conditioner
5. no protein shampoo
...


Everything in your list sounds good, except for possibly these two. If you are heat styling and have damaged hair, you may not want to go no cone/no protein. Cones do offer some thermal protection which natural products can't, and damaged hair often benefits from some added protein.

I say when you're ready to give up heat styling, then you can think about giving up cones, but going no-cone while still flatironing your hair is putting the cart before the horse.

Welcome to LHC! Your hair will grow, I promise! :)

[Dementia1013]

I don't think changing to a silk pillow does much to make up for flat ironing.

Also, going no cone may actually be worse for you if you are heat styling, since cone products offer at least some protection from these processes.

Personally, my hair becomes more fragile when I go no cone and use a shampoo bar.
First of all WELCOME!! :D

I agree with Sedonia. If you're going to change to no cone I would reccomend not flat ironing anymore. If you still want to continue to flat iron then you might want to keep at least some cones in your routine, but please try to straighten just a little less. :D

Also, you may want to look into S&Ding and/or dusting to get rid of some damage on the tips then start treating your hair like fine silk.

Being a dye user (obviously) I know that I damage my hair, but countering that with serious TLC from all the stuff I've learned on here... I honestly think my hair has never been healthier.

There's hope! Welcome once again.