My first post here...looking for help....

[soraya69]

I have been reading the forums for a while, and I must say I'm amazed at everybody's gorgeous hair and the huge amount of knowledge you all seem to have!
I love long hair, but I never seem to be able to achieve it. I'm not even talking knee-length, I just want it to reach waist length, even an inch or two above it would be fine with me. I only had it close to that length once about 20 years ago, but at the time my mom took me to her hairdresser, who proceeded to cut it into a pixie :mad:
Currently my longest layer reaches my bra strap, which is not too bad, while the shortest layer is just slightly below my shoulders. However my hair is very thin (ponytail = as thick as my thumb) and the layering makes it look shorter than it is.
My hair grows very slowly (1/2" or less per month), and what's even worse, it breaks therefore I lose all the length I'm getting. It breaks, because it's damaged...Here is what I currently do to my hair:
- I wash/condition about 3 times/week (yes, I use sulfates and cones and all the nasties, they seem to make my hair look good). I have been using the Nisim FAST 'poo in an attempt to speed my hair growth...not seeing any results yet.
- once/week I use FFekkai Protein Rx anti-breakage mask
- once/week I do the coconut/castor/neem oil pre-wash treatment
- once/week I do a moisturizing mask with heat cap (30 min)
- I always use a leave-in (Infusium)
- During the week I let it air dry, even if it looks bad, as I wear a ponytail every day at work. After the weekend wash, I blow dry and flat iron, using good protection, because I need my hair to look presentable and heat styling is the only way to achieve that.
- I only color my roots every 3-4 weeks (my natural hair is brown and I color it a light natural blonde). Very rarely do I apply the dye throughout my length, and I never use bleach, as the boxed hair color does the job on its own.
- I take hair vitamins (a multi + hair specific vitamin, now trying Viviscal)
I have still lots of breakage, most if it due to the fact that I let a long time go by without getting a trim, when my hair was very damaged (I used to flat iron daily, color the length, had highlights, extensions, etc). I get those nasty white dots about 1-2 cm up my strands, and the hair just bends there and snaps, which obviously makes me lose all the growth I get. I have recently found a nice hairdresser and I got a mini-trim, and I'll be getting trims every 6 weeks, until I get rid of all the white dots and weak hair.
My question is - how can I make my hair grow faster, so I don't feel so naked when I get a trim? I feel like every cm of growth is golden, I don't want to lose it. What should I change in my hair routine? I cannot give up that 1x/week flat ironing, and I need to touch up the roots, but other than that...any suggestions?
I realize my post is so messy, I have so many hair problems I could fill pages with them, but I need some guidelines, that would help me grow longer, healthier hair soon. Thank you!

[amaiaisabella]

If your hair grows 1/2 an inch per month, that is most definitely not slow. When my hair was at its worst condition-wise, it grew about 1/2 an inch... per year ;) My hair grows about 1/2 an inch per month now at its healthiest. You might see it as growing less, or slow, if your hair breaks off at the ends, so you don't see any growth.

Search the boards for different washing methods: WO (water-only), CO (conditioner-only), CWC (condition-wash-condition), S&C (shampoo & conditioner), and others- some members used modified versions of each wash method, so no one method is the answer! It all depends on your hair thickness and curls/waves, or lack thereof.

[SheWolf]

How much protein do you eat everyday? Protein deficiency cannot be replaced by protein on the hair, but since ingested protein is the building block for cell growth, without it your hair will grow weak and prone to breakage.
Also, protein on the hair bonds to it, prevents it from absorbing moisture and consequently dries it out. You might want to try doing the protein mask every other week or just once a month.

[Longlocks3]

What I've found, and what seems to be a good advice from many people on the site: less is more. Honestly my hair is at it's healthiest when I don't do anything to it. No heat of any sort, picking one of the simple washing methods(CO, CWC, NW/SO, WO). I'm not an expert by any means but it just sounds like you are doing lots to the hair. I haven't personally tried S&D trimming methods but instead of a big trim you could always consider it. Good luck and dont' despair!

[spidermom]

You should be o.k. with the protein treatment IF you follow immediately with a moisture treatment.

Some people's hair cannot tolerate being dyed. The few times I did it using a semi-permanent color (supposed to last through 28 shampoos), it completely trashed my hair, and I wasn't even trying to get my color lighter. If you've tried everything you know to care for your hair, and it keeps breaking off, you might be one of us. My hair also cannot tolerate being flat-ironed. I only did it once or twice a month with a good protective product every time, but it trashed my ends. They stuck together like Velcro, and I ended up getting a lot cut off. I was very sad because I loved the shine of flat-ironing. But I want length more than I want super-shiny, straight hair, so I quit the heat styling.

These are my only suggestions: if you want more length and you've tried everything else but it's not happening, get rid of the flat-iron OR the dye. If all your growth is still breaking off, you might have to give up both. If you learn some nice up-dos, they could give you a very nice, professional/respectable look without the damage of heat-styling.

[chrissy-b]

I agree with Spidermom. You may have to cut out those two things. I would first start with doing the protein treatments less frequently and moisturizing more often, trying to stretch the time between hair dyes from 3-4 weeks to 6-8 weeks, and maybe try a different leave in that is more moisturizing rather than one like Infusium that is mostly cones, possibly alternating between the two.

I would try changing at least one of these things (the one that is the easiest for you to give up first) to see how your hair does. If there is improvement, great, if not, try something else.

[Fractalsofhair]

Heat styling and bleaching wreaked my hair, and I have very fine thick hair. I suggest cutting out those. If you stop using cones, it might take some time for it to look good again(2weeks to one month, it will look greasy and weird.). With heat styling, depends on what look you're going for. If you wear a ponytail every day at work, try brushing some oil or more conditioner into your hair so it's smooth.

The boxed hair color is a bleach. Overall though, your treatments help it a bit I'd say. The cones will hide damage, and do work for many people's hair. I'd suggest giving up the bleach/dye at least. It seemed more damaging to my hair than heat styling.

Maybe dye your hair your natural shade or close to it, and only touch up the roots every few months if you have grays. What look are you going for with the flat iron/blow drying? Do you have a lot of frizz before hand?

With layers, I found they damaged my very easily damaged hair. Try getting a blunt cut and letting it grow out from there.

[MsBubbles]

One thing I'd look at would be the ponytail. How is it secured? I had to stop using thin-ish elastics, even though they were the kind people usually recommend as safe or kind to hair. I don't ever put my hair up in a ponytail any more (mostly because it pulls in weird places and hurts like crap), but now, even if I put my hair in a braid I use the really big, loose floppy Conair ponytail holders - the ones that look like circles of cut up old sweatshirt sleeves. Otherwise my ends get pinched and damaged.

Also, putting your hair up the same way every time might cause some kind of stress damage to that same area, so look around here and try out some different ideas for putting your hair up and find out what works for you. Everybody is different and what works for many people here simply might not work for you. I can't deal with hairsticks - they won't stay unless I rip my hair to get them in. But a bun held with a ficcare maximas, loose braids with above-mentioned ponytail holders, or simple claw clips work for me.

The idea of wearing your hair up of course is to protect those fragile ends you seem to have. So maybe you can find a way to put it up gently - then come back here and tell me what you figured out so I can get some ideas :).

Welcome!

[marialena]

I have been reading the forums for a while, and I must say I'm amazed at everybody's gorgeous hair and the huge amount of knowledge you all seem to have!

Welcome to the LHC..:cheese:


I love long hair, but I never seem to be able to achieve it. I'm not even talking knee-length, I just want it to reach waist length, even an inch or two above it would be fine with me. I only had it close to that length once about 20 years ago, but at the time my mom took me to her hairdresser, who proceeded to cut it into a pixie :mad:

You are not the only one! Moms tend to love pixies .. But don't worry .. I believe that you will manage to get your hair grow longer.. You see... you are in the right place!! :p :)



My hair grows very slowly (1/2" or less per month), and what's even worse, it breaks therefore I lose all the length I'm getting. It breaks, because it's damaged...

Your hair are growing quite fast. The length that you say that they get is above the average length that most of us have each month.



Here is what I currently do to my hair:
- I wash/condition about 3 times/week (yes, I use sulfates and cones and all the nasties, they seem to make my hair look good). I have been using the Nisim FAST 'poo in an attempt to speed my hair growth...not seeing any results yet.

I would advice you to try to use less sulfates and cones. It would be good to search in the VIT ( very important threads ) section, ( is a thread that is sticky on the top of other threads) and there you can find some catalogs with shampoos and conditioners that don't have sulfates and cones in them.


- once/week I use FFekkai Protein Rx anti-breakage mask
- once/week I do the coconut/castor/neem oil pre-wash treatment
- once/week I do a moisturizing mask with heat cap (30 min)
- I always use a leave-in (Infusium)


These are very good treatments and it would be good to continue them.


- During the week I let it air dry, even if it looks bad, as I wear a ponytail every day at work. After the weekend wash, I blow dry and flat iron, using good protection, because I need my hair to look presentable and heat styling is the only way to achieve that.

Hmm.. blow drying and flat ironing are not good for hair especially if you want to grow them longer.
These two things can cause a lot of damage to your hair and especially on your hair ends.
I think that this is one of the main reasons for your hair breakage.


- I only color my roots every 3-4 weeks (my natural hair is brown and I color it a light natural blonde). Very rarely do I apply the dye throughout my length, and I never use bleach, as the boxed hair color does the job on its own.

Chemical dyes are not good for hair as well. Perhaps it would be good to change hair color. There are many alternative ways to dye your hair and make them naturally blond.
Check out the cassia thread and the honey thread ( did you know that honey can make hair naturally blond? :) )


I have still lots of breakage, most if it due to the fact that I let a long time go by without getting a trim, when my hair was very damaged (I used to flat iron daily, color the length, had highlights, extensions, etc). I get those nasty white dots about 1-2 cm up my strands, and the hair just bends there and snaps, which obviously makes me lose all the growth I get. I have recently found a nice hairdresser and I got a mini-trim, and I'll be getting trims every 6 weeks, until I get rid of all the white dots and weak hair.

This is a very good solution. Micro trimmings are very good in order to get rid of damage without loosing all of your length. But you have to stop ironing your hair.


My question is - how can I make my hair grow faster, so I don't feel so naked when I get a trim? I feel like every cm of growth is golden, I don't want to lose it. What should I change in my hair routine? I cannot give up that 1x/week flat ironing, and I need to touch up the roots, but other than that...any suggestions?

I'm afraid that you have to give up the ironing. This and the chemical dye obviously destroy your hair. You have not update your hair data yet, and I don't know what is your hair's type, but if your hair are very fine it is normal to get damaged from these things.

So have a look at the threads that I gave you, update your hairs details, ( in order to know what type of hair you have) and if you have more questions don't hesitate to ask again.

Welcome, for one more time, to LHC. :)

[florenonite]

Welcome to LHC! 1/2" a month is average, and what I get most months (though I've been stalling recently).

You say you have a lot of white dots at the ends of your hair. This could well be from either the flatironing or the dyeing, but as you're reluctant to give up those I'll tell you what I reckon caused mine (can't have been colouring or heat-styling as I do neither, yet I still managed to get these dots).

There are a couple of factors that I think contributed to them. Firstly, mechanical damage. How do you detangle your hair? Make sure you do it gently. I find this makes a huge difference to my hair. There's also the ponytail that you're wearing every day. Depending on how long your hair is, the ponytail might be getting tangled, causing damage, so you might be better off with a bun or something. The elastic, too, can cause damage if you tie it too tightly (I only ever wrap the elastic round twice so it doesn't break my hair).

What I think was the greatest problem, however, was silicones. They mask damage, so for a while I didn't realise I was getting splits. However, they were locking out moisture, causing really dry ends. You might want to try 'cone-free for a few weeks, just to see how your hair does with it. If your hair doesn't like 'cone-free, then go back to the 'cones but be sure to clarify regularly.

Another thing might be how you're washing, which can cause mechanical damage and drying out. It's good that you're only washing thrice weekly, but how are you doing it? Do you pile all your hair atop your head? This causes tangles and breakage. Do you shampoo the length, or do you CWC (condition-wash-condition)? Essentially for this method you condition the length, shampoo the scalp (preferably with diluted 'poo), rinse it all out, then condition the length again.

[spidermom]

I can recommend CWC with diluted shampoo. It has made such a big difference to the way my hair used to be from the plain old shampoo and condition method.

[longhairedfairy]

My suggestions:

Make sure your hair is completely wet before you apply shampoo
Only use a very small amount of shampoo and dilute it well (immediately before use)
Condition well
Never wring your wet hair
Do not scrub it dry with a towel
Use a small amount of oil on the length
Use only metal-free ponytail holders
Never tighten your ponytail by pulling halves of the length in opposite directions because it breaks the hair cuticle.
Don't snap off the "white dots." Trim them off just a little above the damage with sharp hair scissors.

[soraya69]

Wow...you guys are so helpful, I really appreciate your advice!
You're all very right, I know I should lay off the flat iron... The thing is, my hair has this weird consistency, I don't even know how to describe it (and I still don't know how to type my hair, lol). If I air dry, it becomes a sort of wavy mass, not nicely-wavy, but still, I can manage it by wetting my hair in the morning and applying some mousse, then putting it in a pony. That look works for when I am at work, but I would hate going out on a weekend like that! If I just blow dry with a round brush, on medium setting, I get a weightless shapeless mass of hair, every single strand is ...ughh...separated from the others by air, there is no flexibility in my hair, it all moves like a whole, I don't know, it's like a mass of nasty frizz. Not even a pony could help in this situation. Blow drying on the highest setting with round brush gives an OK result, but far from nice. Flat ironing makes my hair feel like hair - silky, heavi(er), flexible, shiny - the way hair should be. That's why I have to keep doing it at least when I go out, otherwise I would feel extra ugly :(
I also have to dye it, because dark hair looks very bad with my coloring (I tried it a few years ago and couldn't take it for more than a couple of months...).
Based on the advice I got here, I will try to wear more protective styles (buns), and only use scrunchies (unfortunately they fall off my hair when I sleep, as my hair is so thin after having had my extensions removed). I will also try the no-cone, although I have no idea how my hair will behave. I have been doing some S&D, but because my hair is so thin, even cutting some of those nasties leads to noticeable shortening/thinning of my hair...
I hope my hair is not entirely hopeless...but it sure has so many problems, grrr...
Thanks again for your help, I am sure I will be asking many more questions in the future :)

[florenonite]

From your last post, I get the impression you're putting your hair in a ponytail whilst wet? Don't do that. EVER! It's a very good way to make your hair break.

[SheWolf]

Soraya, pics would help. But to echo the previous post, putting your hair in a ponytail while wet is deadly, you have to stop doing that.
Rereading the thread it also seems that you need a thorough clarifying job, use a conditioner with no cones and no protein and leave that under a cap for at least an hour, rinse with cool water, use a leave in and let it air dry, for starters.
Then oil it when it's dry.
And you should probably use a wide tooth comb instead of a brush, for now.
Then try CO washing, no cones, no protein, just a ton of moisture.
If your hair was your skin, it would probably be all red and irritated, you need a way more gentle approach.
If you must shampoo sometimes, stay away from sulfates and try CWC a couple times a week.
It sounds like your hair is reacting to rough treatment and too frequent, rough handling.

[spidermom]

Do post some pictures. If you don't know how, ask. You will find help.

[Samikha]

For moisture, you can try this treatment (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=128). If you can't post photos, it would help if we knew your hairtype. This article (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/vbjournal.php?do=article&articleid=5)explains that. (Don't miss the link in the article to pictures of the hairtypes!).

It sounds as if your hair is very dry. While some members love cones, more avoid them. Until you know more about what your hair likes and dislikes, it might be wiser to go with the majority.

I also agree with the others that you definitely should dilute your shampoo. Mine is also wavy, and it turns into this huge frizzball if I don't dilute my shampoo and go too light on the conditioner.

[soraya69]

Hmmm....never thought about some of the stuff you guys mention... I do tend to put my hair in a ponytail right after I wet it (to get some defined waves) and mousse it. I figured that there would be no damage because I use a soft scrunchie, but ... is there? So I should let it dry first and then do the pony?
Also, I do wash with undiluted shampoo (I had NO idea this was so bad for your hair!), and I wash the whole length. I don't even think I own a silicone/protein-free conditioner, but I guess I could do the moisturizing treatment you guys recommended instead, and then the leave-in could also be some coconut oil (better than Infusium Repairologie?).
And...I don't clarify. Actually I bought my first clarifying shampoo (B&B Sunday Shampoo) a week ago and used it once - I should use it every week right?
I spent yesterday and most of today reading this site, and I came to the realization that I'm more hair-dumb than I thought :D
So I have a couple of questions:
1. Would it help any if I washed the cones out of my hair sooner rather than later? For ex, last night I flat ironed and applied lots of cones - would it be better to wash it all off tonight, instead of leaving everything on until tomorrow (when I was planning to wash)?
2. How does this routine sound?
Tonight - clarify, do a moisture treatment (coconut oil + castor + neem on wet hair), leave it on for 30 min, rinse, condition, put some coconut oil on damp hair as a leave-in and air dry
Next wash - condition, shampoo, protein mask, deep moisturizing mask, leave-in, then either air dry or blow dry (depending on when I wash next).
Would this help at least a little bit?

[SheWolf]

I think it's overkill. Clarify, moisturize, and leave it alone for a while. Just my 2 cents.

[spidermom]

Clarifying can really dry hair out. I wouldn't recommend doing it more than about once every 2-3 months.

I saved an empty shampoo bottle so that I could mix my shampoo with water and then squirt it all over my scalp. I put conditioner on my length first and leave it hanging down while I wash my scalp area. I very seldom work the suds all the way through my length as the suds running through my hair from the rinse cleans it well enough. This has worked really well to keep my ends from drying out.

The proposed routine above doesn't sound like it would be damaging at all. I'm a minimalist so it seems like too much fuss to me, and I don't know if it would be helpful, but it can't hurt.

[Roseate]

The lack of flexibility in your hair definitely sounds like it wants more moisture. Maybe cut out the protein treatment for a while and just do moisture treatments?

I have wavy hair and it looks 1000% better when properly moisturized. I use the diluted shampoo CWC method, with no sulfates or cones, and my hair now looks pretty darn good when airdryed! It's definitely a process, though, figuring out exactly what your hair needs.

[spidermom]

I forgot to mention that I do use cones, although I am out of my coney serum right now so am cone-free. It doesn't make a huge difference in my hair. In fact, I think that cones seal the moisture INTO (not out of) my hair. Since I use shampoo when I wash, I don't have buildup problems.

[Longhairpixie]

I know this is off topic but where can I get more info on cones?
What products have them and which don't?
What do they do?

[neon-dream]

Oh I know how hard it is to give up the flat iron! I was an addict for 4 years.
I've learn to love my messy waves now, and if I need it to look presentable it goes up into an updo which are also beautiful.
I use cones too, they make my hair more controllable :)
It'd be useful if you posted some pics and updated your hair info too, so we can help you more :)!
Good luck, and welcome to LHC :flowers:

[spidermom]

I know this is off topic but where can I get more info on cones?
What products have them and which don't?
What do they do?

I think there is an article about this. If you go to the top of the page, you can click on the word articles.

[Roseate]

I know this is off topic but where can I get more info on cones?
What products have them and which don't?
What do they do?

Link to LHC article on cones here for you (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/vbjournal.php?do=article&articleid=13). That should get you started.

Cones work well for some, not for others. I went conefree mostly because SLS was irritating to my scalp, and I didn't want to have to worry about removing cone buildup, which can be hard to do without SLS.

[Longhairpixie]

Thank you both soo much!
:)