Hairdressers' psychology: why the tend to chop long hair??

[marialena]

I have read here soooo many threads about the hairdresser's bad behavior, bad cuttings, unprofessionalism, chopping hair without the permission of their clients .. generally sooo many complains.
It is supposed that the profession of hair stylist has to do with the maintenance of beautiful hair.
But from what we have almost all experienced at least once in our lives, this does not happens in most of the cases.

What, in your opinion, the reasons are?

Do they hate us??:p :confused:

Are these the salons policies?

Which are the reasons that salons have a load of unsatisfied clients?

This is a war topic..:eyebrows: you are free to swear them as much as you want with my blessings for all the unwanted choppings we have suffered in the past !!! :p :lol:

But add please with the rest of your complains, (because half of them are already written here), some of the reasons of these behaviors. :)

[chrissy-b]

I'm not a hairdresser so I can't speak on their behalf, but as I'm very vocal about what I want, I don't have horror stories to tell. I've had one really bad hair cut in my life and I was 12 when it happened and too shy to say "No" or ask for what I really wanted. Now that I've been cutting my own hair for over 10 years, when I choose to go to a salon I make sure they know exactly what I want and if they don't give it to me there will be hell to pay. I haven't had a negative experience in an expensive salon in Beverly Hills or a cheaper place like Supercuts since I was 12.

I think that people of all different lengths have both good and bad experiences with hairdressers. The reason why we see more negative experiences here on this site is because 1.) it's a long hair site where nearly everyone on here is trying to grow to great lengths and 2.) we're more conscious of every inch that we lose than the average person. This makes us more sensitive to the nightmare of losing a lot of length and we're more likely to post here about our bad experiences so we can get support from all the great people in this community.

There are probably plenty of people who had their hair chopped off in a way that they didn't specifically ask for but if they aren't trying to grow it long they may not care as much. There are probably plenty who didn't specifically ask for a style and got some short bob but ended up loving it. Those people probably aren't on this site. And I'm sure there is the issue of stylists wanting to change very long hair to be more "hip" but if the stylist doesn't listen to you and you still let them have a go at your hair, then I'm sorry, but that's on you.

[JamieLeigh]

I'm sure there aren't as many bad experiences in the real world as there seem to be on this site. Here, we're all lovers of long locks (hey, alliteration! :D) and it sometimes it even pains us to hear that someone trimmed an inch off, much less lost a foot of hair in the barber's chair. But we're really in the minority, if you think about it. Most people in the world really like long hair on other people, but they either think it's too much work for themselves, or it gets in the way, or it's not trendy enough for them. Most people really do like their hair shorter, and so their salon experiences aren't bad at all - they're exciting, and fun!

Stylists are not all the same - most of them, yes, are trained in shorter hairstyles, because that's what most of the public wants. A lot of them aren't used to long-haired women and men coming in and saying "Just take about an inch off the hemline, and no layers!" What most of the world wants is short and layered and highlighted.

This does not excuse those who completely ignore what the client asks for, as is the case on these forums from what I've read. There should never be a case when the stylist does not listen to the client and decides to create a whole new shorter style when the client only wanted a small trim. That's never ok, and if the client is dissatisfied then he/she shouldn't be expected to pay for the experience monetarily, as he/she will be having to pay for it emotionally for as long as it takes the hair to recover.

And most of it is really about money also. If a stylist can convince you that you "need" constant cutting and coloring and styling, then they have a repeat customer, which is a guaranteed cash flow. Not all stylists are this way, but a good portion of them are, and it's the way they have been taught to be. Push the goods and services as much as possible and sooner or later people will listen and buy them!:rolleyes: But really, that's just business. Every store in the world is that way, no matter the product they're selling.

[wintersun99]

Below are just my presumptions, I am not a stylist.

Hair [stylists] (that word says it all, right?) are trained to cut hair. That is part of the profession. Also part of the psyche. is belief that their field is an artistic field. Stylists create hair-art. As with any other artist, Stylists excel in areas, not across the board. Some may be fabulous at shags, others bobs, others color, others in long hair. While all can probably do the basic cuts they are trained to do in school, it's the years after that shape them. What they enjoy, what is specialized in the salon they work from, what comes with additional training, etc.

So, with anything - the customer must choose wisely. If you have 4a ethnic hair, would you go to a stylist without experience with this hair? If you are a longhair, would you go to a stylist who specializes in pixies?

Buyer beware.

[marzipanthecat]

Hairdressers cut hair. Really. It is what their job is mostly about. Hair needs to be cut, the colour changed, and if it is curly make it straight, and if it is straight make it curly or wavy. Just change change change all the time!

I really do not think it is anything personal, just what they are trained to do!

After all, there is no money to be made in "eat a sensible diet and treat your hair gently" if you want to make money as a hairdresser!

[Janka]

I think they want to create something new. And there's simply nothing to create when you come in for a minitrim... When I look at all these "winner cuts" in the magazines at a hair dresser, it's allways the same: some overcomlicated layer cut, where each hair has a different length, some violet or pink highlights... Me personally, I shrudder at these cuts. It might look good the minute the model is finished, but how does it look afther the first wash at home?
Last time I was at a hair dresser, the other customer was getting colored extentions and a bob longer in the front and shorter at the nape. It suited her, but I knew I would hate such cut, 'cause the hair would constantly get in my mouth and eyes when reading, cooking etc. (I had chin long hair, so I know). With long hair, I simply take a claw or whatever and my hair is out of my way. But I can wear it down when I want, style it differently every day. With short hair, I think the styling possibilities are close to zero...

[lapushka]

I think it's much harder for a stylist to cut and style very long hair, hair that is BSL and longer. For instance, if they have to cut layers into it, they still have to be able to reach it with their arms and hands if they extend it to cut it. I think that's why when someone goes for a much shorter style, longer hair is almost always removed in a quick chop or pony tail and then cut off to a shorter, more manageable length. It's also, second of all, I think, time constraints. So when you want to have a style cut into longer hair, even past BSL, I don't think they are at all happy to see you and want to make something out of that head of hear so it will be more manageable to them, not you. I don't think it's ever about the customer and your hair but about their job and what they can handle.

[Gypsygirl]

First of all, kudos to my trusted stylist- she's great. :)
As far as those that seem to "hate" long hair are concerned, I do think this is mostly about money. They want to (or maybe they're even told to) sell haircuts that are kind of "high maintenance"- meaning, the clients need to come back often! Long hair is pretty low maintenance, I think, especially if it's virgin hair.

[spidermom]

The worst haircut I ever got was from a very pregnant stylist near the end of the day who commented that she was exhausted; I should have known better than to sit in her chair.

Hair stylists are people too -- they get tired, they make mistakes, they misunderstand, their minds wander. I think that some of them kind of go into automatic pilot and do the same cut they've been doing all day in spite of the fact that you said "1 inch." A lot of the horror stories I've read here included some version of the phrase "I wasn't paying attention, and the next thing I knew 4 inches were gone."

Even though my stylist is good and I have every reason to trust her, I never stop paying attention to what she's doing. If she's been cutting layers all day (all week, all month, even all year), she might forget that I don't want them. I'm human; I forget what I'm doing sometimes. She's human, too.

[morningstar]

My mom was a stylist. She always had the current hair look. As a child I wore my hair long and straight but later on enjoyed new looks as well. Lets face it stylists are concerned most of the time with fashion and all the new looks. I think the mind set of a stylist is that they keep up with current trends and we that grow hair do not. It is not true of course but It might be as they see it. I do not see a stylist at all anymore and do my own trimmings (dustings) and my BF does the 1" trimmings very well.

Spidermom My very last hair cut by a stylist was a very pregnant girl. She was tired and distracted. It was crooked. :justy:

[Snowflakey]

i have TONS of horror stories, too many to share! it just seems like i'm horribly unlucky with hair salons. everytime i CLEARLY asked them to trim half an inch, i end up with 3-4 inches gone. it doesn't matter where i go, it always ends up like that.

i suspect hairdressers are compelled to cut more hair off than the amount i asked for because of the price of the cut. the places i've been to cost about $30 per cut, and yet, i only ask for half an inch of trim (and styling of the bangs). maybe they think i'm not getting my money's worth because trimming that little only takes a couple minutes, so they hack off more hair to make them feel like they're not ripping me off for a 10 minute trim. that's my theory anyway.

so, as of two years ago, i stopped going to salons and i cut my own hair at home. now it's been able to grow pretty long. :)

[wintersun99]

Snowflakey-
Dude, that just doesn't make sense that happens every time. I would suggest that the next time you go in, nicely state what you want and then state that you will not pay for anything other than what you are clearly asking for. If more than you ask is removed, no pay and no tip.

I've had that happen once or twice that I ask for 1/2" and get and 1" removed but never have I received a cut of 3"-4" beyond what I've asked for.

ETA: or right, cut your own at home. right on. :D

[spidermom]

Spidermom My very last hair cut by a stylist was a very pregnant girl. She was tired and distracted. It was crooked. :justy:

Not too surprising, is it?

[Spike]

Well . . .

First and foremost, salons exist to make money. Period.

The way you make money as a salon is to have hairdressers that are trained in the newest latest looks for hair. And that newest latest look needs to change all the time so people will go out and get the next big thing done.

So most of the customers will walk in and ask for THAT style--whatever THAT happens to be at the moment. And most of the THAT styles are high maintenence in at least one area--tools, styling products, or cuts.

Let us suppose that I dress hair for a living. For the last week, I have been cutting THAT style on most of the heads that walk in. I have been trained in how to cut high-maintenance looks so clients will have to come back and get trimmed into shape and buy more product every few weeks so my employer will make money.

In walks a person with hair to his/her waistband/hip pockets/knees, who asks for a one half inch trim. I think, "Clearly, this is not going to be a bread-and-butter customer because that style is not going to require maintenance. I'd better try to talk this person into THAT style to get them coming back every few weeks."

Let's also consider that trimming a half-inch off hair that hangs past the seat of the chair when the owner sits down is a challenge in itself when that's not the norm for the hairdresser. All the landmarks--ears, shoulders, etc. are way off there in the distance as I stand with my comb, trying to get an even half-inch off the hemline.

So I've got an unusual (for me) situation with its own unique challenges. I'm probably going to do what most folks do when confronted with too much novelty--I'm going to use what worked before to solve this new problem. Hello, layers! Goodbye, 8 inches of hair!

Is this RIGHT? Oh, sweet barking cheese, no!!! The customer, in the end, is always right. If hairdressers knew that we'd be loyal as loyal could be to those who got it right, and if we make sure to tip generously to make up for our infrequent visits, then the situation might improve a little.

[Heidi_234]

Well, were do we start - :D
(whatever I say would not apply to all of them, but for those hairstylists who do chop off alot this might apply).
One reason I learned to know is that hairstylist want women to have about shoulder length cut. When hair is about shoulder length, growth is much more noticeable. So they intentionally cut it as short so that the client will have to come back sooner in order to maintain that cut. For most people APL and BSL would be just 'long', but if their about shoulder length cute hip trendy cut grows out beyond the shoulders, it time to go back to the salon. Money. :nono:
Another possible reason is that for most people, and hairdressers included, 'long hair' is BSL. So when you say you want to grow your hair long, they think BSL, and adjust their cutting on the same level. It's so easy to forget that for other people waist or hip length hair is super long, when you're feeling that it's too short on you. :)
And last but not least - bad communication. derived from the reason above, they might not get you without detailed explanation. For them 'trimming the very ends' might be 1" or more, when for you it is 1/4" or 1/2" at best. You need a stranger to have a job done, so you better explain thoroughly what exactly are the properties of that job. Show on yourself how long you plan to grow your hair, show on a ruler how much you want to trim, show on picture where you imagine that line where your freshly trimmed hemline would be. Make it easier on the hairdresser, and it would be so much better for you.

[Roseate]

I'll echo what others have said about the need for good communication, the fact that most people don't grow hair longer than BSL or waist, and the fact that layered 'dos are probably more interesting and profitable to cut than 1/2" trims.

Also, there is always a disconnect built into any transaction where you're paying someone to realize your vision. Graphic design, interior design, clothing design, custom furniture... anything like that. The designer will have one idea, the client will have another, and they both have to listen and communicate very well, or the finished product isn't going to work.

Part of the work of a creative professional is to offer suggestions, but then to back down gracefully if the client isn't interested, and to recognize that you are working for the client, not the other way around. Totally applies to hair too.

ETA: Just wanted to add that I :heart: my stylist!

[hazelnut]

While most hairdressers just want money, there are actually some that really care about your hair and will take the time to look after it. I can't say that I had "caring" hairdressers. I was going to this one woman before and she would straighten my hair and get it sooooooo straight. Sometimes I questioned whether or not she was actually just using a flatiron to get it straight or if she was perming it??! I went to her for about a year (why I stayed with her for so long will always be a mystery to me) but she would always look at my hair and say, "what are you doing to your hair?! It's breaking off..." I should have turned around and said, "my hair is suffering from crappy stylist syndrome." Or something along those lines. :D

[morningstar]

Spike
Oh, sweet barking cheese, no!!! :rollin: Hey I'm stealing this line. :D

end hijack

[Jae6]

IME, my friends whose hair got cut a lot shorter than they wanted were passive in the chair when everything was happening. Me, I'm pretty laissez-faire when it comes to haircuts, so if it's too short, I don't mind...now if it's UNEVEN...oooo, don't mess w/ me! LOL

Seriously though, I've never gotten my hair cut shorter or cut in a way I didn't want unless the hairstylist was inexperienced or tired, regardless of hair length & price point. My current hairstylist (who I haven't seen in 2 years LOL) is really great about listening to what the customer wants and doesn't piss&moan about it unless you've already established that kind of relationship w/ her. =) This is probably why it's a 3-month waiting period to get an appt. w/ her...rare gem, she is.

...and I'm totally laughing @ the "sweet barking cheese"...can I steal this too? LOL

[lilalong]

Ok, it might be the German system, but my experience is completely opposite. For years I used to grow my hair to BSL and then go to the hairdresser to chop it back to shoulder. Every time, without fail, the hairdresser hesitated to make such a drastic cut. I had to tell them that I'm not attached to my hair, and, please, could they cut it now like I asked them to.

I suspect there is a difference in what hair dressers are taught in beauty school.

[Helen Baq]

My experience leads me to believe that many stylists desperately need to prove their artistic prowess. I have straight hair that won't hold a curl or perm (though I think that's changing...), a ridiculously dramatic cow lick right up front, and very thick, very fine hair. My experiences with hairdressers is mostly this: I go in and tell them all about how my hair won't curl and has a big cowlick, so please no bangs and no cut that needs curling. This seems to be an invitation to a big challenge for them. They immediately wish to give me a curly cut with bangs. They insist they have mad skills that will allow these miracles. One of the best hairdressers I ever had started that way with me. I went to him, explained all the basics, and told him my hair grows really, really fast, so please cut it shorter than you think it should be. He permed my hair, gave me bangs, and cut it the length he thought it should be. I came back six weeks later with my bangs down past my chin and ruler straight hair. He never mentioned a perm after that and always gave me a haircut that would grow gracefully, though he did continue to give me bangs that worked pretty well.

Another stylist I went to: I came in with a drawing of what I wanted, but did not have the back drawn in detail. She asked if I cared what she did with the back. Since the length was defined, I told her no, thinking she would just work on what was between the length and the top of my head. Somehow this translated to carte blanche in hair cutting rights. I ended up with some horribly trendy thing that was so out of balance it made me hold my head sideways! I made her even it out the next day and ended up with a bob. :(

I've had two people in my whole life that could cut my hair in a way I liked and that worked with my hair. I guess stylists are used to hair that's more cooperative than mine. It also seems to me that they are taught these 'tricks' in beauty school that they are anxious to try out, so when they meet a challenge head like mine, they genuinely think they can 'fix' it. I get a lot of exclamations of surprise from stylists! I don't have bad experiences because I'm a long hair, I'm a long hair more because of my bad experiences! :p

[Elenna]

Well, were do we start - :D
(whatever I say would not apply to all of them, but for those hairstylists who do chop off alot this might apply). One reason I learned to know is that hairstylist want women to have about shoulder length cut. When hair is about shoulder length, growth is much more noticeable. So they intentionally cut it as short so that the client will have to come back sooner in order to maintain that cut. For most people APL and BSL would be just 'long', but if their about shoulder length cute hip trendy cut grows out beyond the shoulders, it time to go back to the salon. Money....:nono:

No wonder why I always ended up with shoulder length hair. I wanted to grow my hair out about a year before joining LHC. I told the hairdresser that. And sometimes she would listen and other times she wouldn't. It was just to keep me off balance. Basically, she just wanted the money, and really wasn't interested in what I wanted. I kept going back because she was a good colorist. My hair seemed to grow, but my hair really was NOT growing. So I quit going to the hairdresser.

[lora410]

My horror story goes like this. At the time I had shoulder length layered hair. My layers started to grow in so I went and got it re-done. well, my usual stylist wasn't there so I let the gay guy cut my hair.He pulled out a razor come and I got re layers all right, there wasn't a hair longer then 2" on my head. I was HORRIFIED and not to mention I looked like a boy shudder: I got a free cut and free sytling products though :rolleyes:

[wintersun99]

....so I let the gay guy cut my hair....

seriously? was that necessary info. for the story?

[Dreams_in_Pink]

My case is a little different; whenever i go to a salon to have my hair cut to a considerably short length, they refuse to cut it!! They just cut some layers to so-called tame down the frizz and then straighten it.

This is why i recently grabbed my scissors and cut my whole ponytail myself :D after my "dusting", they couldn't refuse correcting what i've done :D

[kakaa]

I think they chop it off because it's good for business - long hair is just not profitable.
However, I have to add that many women are envious of women with long hair (I know it's an awful thing to say but I have noticed it).

[ungratefulgirl]

I went to cosmetology school, got my license as a hair dresser, and actually decided it wasn't what I wanted to do, and that I should pursue something else. One thing I remember is that the teachers brainwashed people by telling most women who were past their thirties that they shouldn't have their long hair at that age. Also, they would go to lots of women in class and tell them that they didn't look good in long hair, and if your hair is fine or your face thin that you shouldn't have long hair. It was a very bad influence, and and the same thing probably affected them when they were students.

[Nat242]

I've read a lot of stories on here about hairdressers who have cut off too much. Very often the poster states that they were nervous, weren't comfortable, or that the hairdresser didn't seem to listen to them or answer questions etc., but they went ahead with the cut anyway. Disaster ensues. I think you have to be clear - if that includes bringing out a ruler, so be it - and if the hairdresser seems less than enthused, leave.

I doubt many hairdressers became hairdressers in order to do 1/4 inch trims. Some probably think they're doing you a favour by adding some "style" to it, even if you didn't ask for it.

There are lots of great hairdressers out there - when I was getting short, funky cuts I met quite a few of them. I'm sure the majority of bad hair cuts are the result of misunderstandings, not malice or conspiracies.

I haven't had a professional trim since I joined LHC. If I decide I want one, I'm taking in a ruler. If they don't seem happy with that, I'm leaving.

[Lexy]

my usual stylist wasn't there so I let the gay guy cut my hair

In this case his sexual preference doesn't really impact the story, so it would have been best to find some other way to describe him. It sounds a bit like you were equating his homosexuality with your bad haircut. :flower:

[GlennaGirl]

I haven't really had that many hairdressers want to cut a ton off my hair. I have had my share of "your hair is too fine to grow long...really, you should take X amount of inches off" but the instant I say, "Well, I'm trying to grow it and only want half an inch cut off," I get an "okay" and off comes half an inch.

I might just be getting really lucky.

I actually haven't had my hair cut in almost a year, but the last time I went, the hairdresser asked me specifically what I wanted and that's how much she cut off and that was it. :)

[RancheroTheBee]

Honestly? I think sometimes people aren't communicating with their hairdressers well enough. Have a big long talk with them. Ask them to approximate what "an inch" is, because what they think is an inch might be different from your idea of an inch. Your idea of a "v-hemline" might differ from their's. They can't read your mind, and it seems that oftentimes people assume the person doing your hair CAN. You can gain a lot from just clarifying as much as you can.

I'm not saying that people who have had bad experiences just aren't talking enough. Sometimes, the person cutting your hair just honest-to-goodness doesn't give a crap how particular you are, and wings it (I've had it happen.)

At the same time, I've heard a lot of people go, "I asked him to trim it! This isn't a trim - it's a cut!" Well, did you ONLY ask for a trim? Always be throurough.

[Unofficial_Rose]

I went to cosmetology school, got my license as a hair dresser, and actually decided it wasn't what I wanted to do, and that I should pursue something else. One thing I remember is that the teachers brainwashed people by telling most women who were past their thirties that they shouldn't have their long hair at that age. Also, they would go to lots of women in class and tell them that they didn't look good in long hair, and if your hair is fine or your face thin that you shouldn't have long hair. It was a very bad influence, and and the same thing probably affected them when they were students.

Well that explains why, when I once went to a high-end salon, I ended up with boy-short hair, despite explaining LOUD and CLEAR to the stylist that I was growing it, and only wanted a trim. She said "You have a pretty face, you shouldn't hide it with all this hair". I would have understood this more, had she not had a long-ish mass of spiral curls herself! I had wondered if it was my age that made her think I shouldn't grow my hair.

[enfys]

It's not just us; I've had lots of male friends have problems with a trim being misunderstood. Imagine that when you only had an inch and a half to start with!

From my experience of listening to other peoples sob stories ( never been to a hairdresser myself) it's usually the hairdresser does what they please, and if you ask for a two inch trim, and they lunge in at eight inches from the bottom, there's nothing you can do.

Also, I don't think it's been mentioned, that this is often justified as being done to get rid of "damage". Some hairdressers seem to not understand that the "damage" is just what your hair does in the rain, and it rained when you were on your way.

A lot of people don't feel brave enough to self trim, but I'd rather self trim with a blindfold on underwater without a snorkel than go to a hairdresser without a ruler and a witness.

I too love the barking cheese line!

[Tap Dancer]

I went to cosmetology school, got my license as a hair dresser, and actually decided it wasn't what I wanted to do, and that I should pursue something else.

That's what happened to my mom in 1970. :)

[Tap Dancer]

I think hairdressers get a bad rap sometimes. I've found a great salon/stylist that I've been going to for 8+ years now, but a ton of different people cut my hair before that (usually in cheaper, chain salons). I always got what I asked for.

[Mangachan]

Below are just my presumptions, I am not a stylist.

Hair [stylists] (that word says it all, right?) are trained to cut hair. That is part of the profession. Also part of the psyche. is belief that their field is an artistic field. Stylists create hair-art. As with any other artist, Stylists excel in areas, not across the board. Some may be fabulous at shags, others bobs, others color, others in long hair. While all can probably do the basic cuts they are trained to do in school, it's the years after that shape them. What they enjoy, what is specialized in the salon they work from, what comes with additional training, etc.

So, with anything - the customer must choose wisely. If you have 4a ethnic hair, would you go to a stylist without experience with this hair? If you are a longhair, would you go to a stylist who specializes in pixies?

Buyer beware.

If I go to McDonald's and ask for a big mac, I don't care if the guy making the burgers used to work for Emeril and wants to give me fillet migon with gold flecks...I just want a big bac. They are providing a service and they need to flex their artistic muscles if the customer is open to it.

My experience with stylists is not as deep as "I'm an artist". Everyone I have been to does things that a trained professional should not be doing even though they claimed to know about my hair and what I wanted done.

The first one: She was an elderly lady that tore through my hair with small toothed combs and fried it with greasy products. When I was in high school and wanted this sleek straight style I always came out looking like a 40 yr old woman. I had to go to her because she was also my mother's hair dresser.

The second one: Where do I begin? She overlapped chemical processes. I didn't know she did this until I caught her doing it to my sister. It took me 2+ years to get from APL to BSL even though my hair grows at the average .5 inches a month because she would cut it when my ends where doing fine and when it got to BSL it was thinning (see the part about overlapping chemicals). She just had her own agenda for my hair that cost me 8 hours per visit and way too much money. If I'm spending 8 hours somewhere, I want a paycheck or a degree from them.

My cousin: I let her do my hair for prom. I wouldn't let her come near me with scissors because I would have ended up at ear length. She also tried to get me to relax my hair even though my last one was 2 weeks prior.

Every hair stylist sister has ever had: They ALL broke her hair off and eventually chopped it off. Things like this have happened to almost everybody I know IRL and the net too, it's not just this site. So, I've pretty much sworn off stylists.

[JessicaVonMaim]

I think your experience will depend on the salon you go to and the training your hair stylist has. I'm sure some cosmetology schools are better at teaching their students then others. Also your hair is a stylists advertisement, if you have stylish hair then people may ask you who does it, then they get a referral and more money. Long hair isn't considered "stylish" to most people so there probably isn't much of a chance of you getting asked where you get your hair cut :p. Although I can't say I have ever had a bad experience with a stylist. In fact the worst hair cut I got came from my mom when I was about 8. I had almost booty length hair and got a "trim" up to above shoulder length.:laugh:

My hair stylist I go to now is pretty good, and really nice. She has never tried to talk me out of or into anything, and she always likes that I know what I want :p. She also trims my mom's hair too, and my mom has a short bob, so she is very capable of dealing with all types of hair. I feel pretty lucky reading some people's stories that I have never had to deal with a scissor happy stylist.

[Fractalsofhair]

My biggest issue with stylists is color. They see a light natural blonde with a silvery tint to her hair, and they decide that she'd look better as a golden blonde, which usually involves them convincing my mother, my getting upset and crying(well that was more middle school.), and ending up with horrid highlights and fried hair. Or else they decide to give me tons of razored layers, which usually end up giving me split ends within a week. I don't ask for color, and always ask not to have it, but it doesn't help that I'm in high school and my mum hears that it will help my hair look better and she automatically tries to make me get it done. Thankfully, this hasn't happened for a few months, since I had a nasty allergic reaction last time I went to the salon I go to. As a result, I had to leave right after the hair cut, before my stylist could do more. I seriously need to figure out how to induce those things subtly! ;) Short hair cuts do make more money for them, but so do color and products. I have very sensitive skin, and they seem to be convinced if I use the brand of products they're selling my scalp won't bleed or break out in sores or hives. I've even had them do patch tests and they've been convinced it will somehow be different on my scalp. I've also tried to prove to them that I have fine hair and that I can't use heavy duty bleach without problems, showing them the damage, but they usually try to convince me to use something with cones in it. Ick for my hair! Oh well, eventually I'll find a good stylist.

[misspriss]

I think my problem with stylists is that they do not understand curly hair. I never got a good haircut til I was out of high school. I got good haircuts from the walmart salon, and from high dollar salons, and I've gotten horrible cuts from high dollar salons.

Part of telling the stylist what you want does not always work, you may not understand that a style will not work with your hair. I always asked for a style, and with my wavy/curly hair, it just wouldn't work. Stylists would attempt to give me whatever I asked for, but it didn't work.

I have found a great stylist, I wish I could go back but now I don't want a haircut...

[SheWolf]

My hairstylist knows that a happy customer is a repeat customer. She listens to every word, gives her opinion and advice, but she never starts cutting until we both agree to the letter on what to do. Then she sticks to it. I've never had bad surprises since I've started going to her.

[going gray]

I've finally found the perfect stylist too, we are both on the same page, so to speak, she knows what my future goals are, she's wonderful.

[JamieLeigh]

A lot of people don't feel brave enough to self trim, but I'd rather self trim with a blindfold on underwater without a snorkel than go to a hairdresser without a ruler and a witness.

You guys go ahead and steal the "barking cheese" line - I'm stealing this one!! :eyebrows: :p

[prosperina]

I've only had two or three annoying stylists. Most are very reluctant to cut long hair. The few times I got a short hair cut I had to really encourage them to cut more.


Hair salons are for people who want to 'tame' or radically change their hair. Good stylists are artistic and want to color, perm, straighten, style and make dead protein into something it is not. If you are interested in natural long hair, hair salons are not really the place for you. I do however think that there should be more trained professionals with sharp scissors who listen to instructions and can cut a straight line. That's what I look for in a hair cutter. I don't care to give myself over to a professional so s/he can make me look "better." I don't let women at the mall do my make up or sales women pick out my clothes either. I hate being sold beauty and I've a good eye for it myself and I've been dealing with my looks for a lot longer than any stylist or make up artist.

[Marie99]

They aren't all bad. I had just past BSL hair cut into a pixie years ago because it was fried and she asked me if I was really sure and made her friend come over to look at my hair to see if they could save it. It was past saving because I had used Sun-In a zillion times that year almost every day, but at least they considered saving it.

Most of them do want you to have a cut that means you need to come back very month.

Cutting hair is a big business. They need people to be dependent on them. If all the customers only came once a year to get splits whacked off, they'd all starve.

I honestly can't remember the last time I had an actual hair cut from a salon. Maybe early 2003.

[Eireann]

I think it's probably just that it's harder to handle long hair. The chairs only adjust so much, and to have it high enough to trim long hair lying flat, or low enough to trim long hair pulled up straight is probably impossible. It tangles when you try to blow it dry. Really, all the things we experience as long hairs, without the added devotion to our hair that we all have. I don't take it personally. I'm just VERY cautious about who I let touch my hair.

[Wicked Princess]

I haven't ever had a bad experience at a hair salon, not even a cheap one! At each and every one of them, I expressed myself as clearly as I could, and they seemed to get the picture pretty fast.

Some lines I use frequently:

"I only want this much [shows with fingers] cut off of the bottom most part of my hair. Ignore any of the layers completely."

"I can't emphasis how important it is that I keep as much of the length as possible."

"I'm extremely territorial about my hair, but I'm trusting you to cut it now. "

This last line brings up an interesting observation that I've made. At many hair salons, telling your hair dressers that you are trusting them with something that you've just emphasized as precious seems to get them to be more respectful of your requests, and of your hair in general. I think this may be due to 1) you're treating them like a person, not some mindless drone that you already expect will mess up and 2) you've also just established yourself as one of [I]THOSE customers.

I can only speak for myself, but I don't think very many hair dressers hate long hair. I think they're fascinated by it! All of mine seem to linger a little bit while playing with it. I think it may remind them of a time when they liked to play with other people's hair as a child, or something. If I wanted my hair dried after it was washed there, though, I've heard some of them lightly complain that it took soooo long to dry. It really wasn't offensive to me, just so everyone knows. I really can't blame them. I told them to use their coolest setting to dry iii, tbl hair, after all, hehe. :flowers:

[Medievalmaniac]

Another problem can be the client who doesn't often go to the salon for whatever reason. I know when I went as a young adult, on my own, I had NO idea what to say or how to get what I wanted (hair care really is a foreign language, yes? :) ) So I'd say something like, "I just want to get rid of the damage, but I don't want to sacrifice a lot of length." The hairdresser would get rid of the damage as best she could without sacrificing much length - but that would often be several inches and I'd be upset and crying. Then she would tell me "Next time you come in, just tell whoever does your hair to take no more than an inch off" etc. etc. until I finally learned how to ask for what I wanted specifically. Some hairdressers will do exactly what you ask for first - so if you say "lose damage" first they're already assessing that and never really hear you say "without sacrificing length" or, alternately, they really don't know how to give you what you want, so they figure they'll get rid of the damage and make it look as good as they can because that's their job - there are a lot of reasons for it, I think, usually miscommunication and misunderstanding, coupled with either lack of time, lack of ability, or lack of experience on the part of one or both parties.

I think, anyhow. I don't think it's a personal vendetta or a conspiracy, or at leastnot in most cases!!

[Bellalalala]

I know that there must be good stylists out there, there must be!

However, I've never found one except when I dated a stylist who actually understood my hair.

I don't have long hair, the longest layer is barely APL (yes, I love my layers, my hair is a big triangle without them). I have gone to every top stylist in my city pretty much, at least twice, just in case they needed to see how my hair responded to their massacre the first time. No dice.

Because I dated a stylist, I communicate clearly; I show them where the last person went wrong, they ALWAYS exclaim how they can't believe someone charged me 'that much' for such a terrible cut!

I tell them I'm growing it out, that I don't use heat tools, I show them the two different textures in my hair (curly top, straight on bottom), how I have a cowlick at my bangs, how conventional short layers won't work and how one side curls more than the other, etc. They assure me that they know exactly what to do with it, and "don't worry, I've worked with all of these issues before, you're going to love it"

They always do the same thing, they cut a shoulder length cut with layers, except they leave the bottom layer long. Wait. What?? Why??!!!

So I have a ball of curly fluff around my head and a thin, straight, scraggly, bottom layer hanging down like a rat tail. Great. My head looks like a mushroom. Just great. And they marvel at their creation like they've just solved all of the hair problems I've ever had, and point at my sad little flat bottom layer and say:
"See! I kept the length just liked you asked, I just gave the rest a great shape"

It's like when I say "please, please don't make me a mushroom head!" they hear "please, please I've always wanted a mushroom head! That would be SUPER!"

So, now I'm growing it out. My hair is idiot proof when it's long.
At least now my fiance will stop making fun of me for spending so much money on looking stupid.

[Oh, and for the record, I've also tried just not saying anything, to see if what I'm saying is the problem...nope, still ugly, and shoulder length.]

[HeatherLarsen]

This thread offend me as a Cosmetologist. I agree that just like any profession there will be some bad apples but to create an entire post basically speaking in behalf of all our us, is wrong. I think that what you are assuming is ignorant.

[shortgoinglong]

Oh, the horrors I've suffered over the years! I went to a male hairdresser when I was 18 to get a spiral perm. He put the perm in my hair and left to talk on the phone. His timer went off to rinse out the solution and he went on talking for over half an hour. I was too shy to say anything then. My hair was so fried that it took years of pampering to recover. My sister was getting married and her husband loved her long hair. She went to Wal-Mart salon to get a trim and curls put in for her wedding. Her hair was about waist length with no layers at all. She politely explained exactly what she wanted done. The lady turned around and chopped her hair up to her shoulders with face framing layers! This was after my sister told her she wanted to keep her long hair. My sister and her hubby were both horrified as she has very fine hair and it took her years to grow it that long. That was two years ago and it still hasn't grown out. Going to a hairdresser is like going to a doctor. You are putting your hair in their hands and trusting they will not mess it all up. That is why I am afraid to go. LOL

I must also say, in response to Heather Larson's post, that there are some good (I mean great!) stylists! I have had some that were sensational but there are always some bad apples.

[Cynder]

I've had good results with my stylest. When I first started going to him he had long black hair, but its currently in a mohawk (bright blue). He listens to what I want, talks me out of things that I have tried in the past and does not work for my hair (bangs)
He has also seen me go from waist length to chin length bob and back many times, holding my hands when I needed it, and trimming off only as little or as much as I asked.
Of course it doesn't help that he has been my husband friend for 20 years, and well, I know where he lives.

[Teacherbear]

Please note that this thread has been bumped from 2 months ago.

Most people here at LHC are perfectly aware that there are good and bad people in most professions, including hairstylists.

We have several hairstylists here at LHC. They are good, kind, supportive members. We also have many people who have had good and bad experiences with hairdressers and/or haircuts.

A bad haircut does not mean it is necessarily the hairdresser's fault. Sometimes it is a lack of communication between stylist and client.

Also, remember that this is a longhair site. The goal of most people here is to grow their hair long. Having short hair isn't evil. Having long hair isn't evil.

[EynaraWolf]

I found a great styles today. It might have helped that she is another long hair, but I clearly expressed that I was growing my hair out and that I just needed a tiny trim and I wanted bangs.

She did the bangs beautifully, but when we got the trim part, I of course got nervous, because I only wanted 1/4 of inch off at the very most, and every other stylist I have been to has take off an inch!. She promised no more than an 1/8 of inch and gave me a little more than a dusting to get the split ends off.

1) Be very, very clear about what you want.
2) Check out both the stylist and the clientele BEFORE you get your hair cut.
3) Be very, very clear about what you want.
4) Tell them you are growing out your hair for personal reasons and its none of their business why if you don't want to tell them why (even if it's just that you like your hair long.)
5) Be very, very clear about what you want.

If the stylist is receptive to what you want from the start, the likely hood of tears is almost none, if from the start the stylist wants to do something different than what you have been very clear in stating you want, then politely leave and find someone else to cut your hair.

Everyone has an opinion about someone else's hair. When looking for a stylist, make sure that person's opinion closely matches yours. It will make both you and your stylist happy with the experience. (Happy customers tip more and refer more customers.)

Oh, and be very, very clear about what you want!:p

[Smokering]

The worst stylist I ever had (or didn't have, as it turned out) wanted to chop my hair off simply because she didn't know what to do with it. I didn't go to her for a cut but for a wedding hair consultation, and she was very young and eyed my hip-length hair like it was a rogue wildebeest. The entire "consultation" consisted of her gingerly touching my ends with the tips of her fingers and saying "You could cut it to here" - gesturing to BSL - "and it'd still be long". Yeah, 'cause a foot or so of hair is nothing... I didn't go back. (Actually, due to a miscommunication between me and my maid of honour she didn't realise I wasn't planning to go back, and we got a phone call some weeks later because she'd come in at 9AM on a Saturday for a trial run on my hair. I did feel bad about that - but not, to be perfectly honest, that bad. Her attitude was appalling - it was basically "Meh, I don't know what we'll do and I've never dealt with hair this long, but we'll figure something out, I guess".)

Not that the wedding stylist I ended up going with was much better, but that's another story...

Most of my childhood stylists had a very clear reason for cutting my hair: my mother told them to. :p This despite the fact that I was sobbing my little heart out. I've never been sure whether I should feel sorry for them in retrospect, or condemn them for violating my tiny human rights...

[nowxisxforever]

I've never had a good cut, but then most of the times I've been to a stylist was because I was young and my mother wanted someone else to do my hair for once. Most of my bad haircuts I got from my mother, to be perfectly honest-- and in and of themselves, if you *liked* the styles, they were very well done.

The only other times I've been to a stylist were as a "treat" paid for by family members as a teenager. Mostly I just don't like any "styled" cuts since I don't like to fuss with my hair like people with styled hair tend to need to-- with curling irons and product and whatnot. It really wasn't the stylists' fault, although I wasn't pleased when one stylist gave me a very minor bit of layering without first asking.

I'm much happier that I can cut my own hair, or, if necessary, put the fear of death into my grandmother and then ask her to cut 1/2 inch off (this is the woman who once walked up behind me and snipped off my bangs as a middle-schooler-- it's hard getting that trust back!).

I think most of *our* experiences is a lot like what the other posters have mentioned... they're trained in shorter hair, they do shorter hair all the time, and they are 'supposed' to get us into high-maintenance hairstyles that require their expensive product they can sell us. By no means are *all* stylists this way, but generally when someone does come in, they're prepared to go out looking entirely different, or are coming in for a trim/shape on their already high-maintenance hairstyle.

I've actually been considering going into a salon to get my hair straightened (with a flat-iron, not permed!) just once, to see what it looks like straight at this length. Maybe a teensy trim, if it looks like I can trust them, but likely not.

[kwaniesiam]

Please note that this thread has been bumped from 2 months ago.

Most people here at LHC are perfectly aware that there are good and bad people in most professions, including hairstylists.

We have several hairstylists here at LHC. They are good, kind, supportive members. We also have many people who have had good and bad experiences with hairdressers and/or haircuts.

A bad haircut does not mean it is necessarily the hairdresser's fault. Sometimes it is a lack of communication between stylist and client.

Also, remember that this is a longhair site. The goal of most people here is to grow their hair long. Having short hair isn't evil. Having long hair isn't evil.

Thank you, Teacherbear :flowers: As an aspiring stylist who is going to school in a few weeks to learn the trade, I wanted to chime in and say the exact same thing.

[Bellalalala]

Thank you, Teacherbear :flowers: As an aspiring stylist who is going to school in a few weeks to learn the trade, I wanted to chime in and say the exact same thing.

Sweet! The more LHC stylists there are, the shinier the world will be in my opinion!:D

[ericthegreat]

As an apprenticing hairstylist myself, I can give an honest answer as to why some, yes only some hairstylists cut more than what we would like them to cut.

During the years I studied at cosmetology school, my hair length started out at below shoulder length and by the time I graduated I had chest length hair. Her's the ironic part..........in the beginning when my hair was only below shoulder length, EVERYONE in my class wanted to cut my hair......some wanted to give me a mohawk, others wanted to do a fade, and many more hit me up with requests to be their highlight and color guinea pig. The spirit of a hairstylist takes what you have right now and transforms that into something else of their creation. We are artists, your heads are our canvas, our clay for us to mold. I politely declined to let any of my classmates cut my hair, all I would allow for them were blow out practicing sessions and braiding and updo experiments. I even had cornrows done on several occasions, I won't be getting them again anytime soon tho, these types of braids really pull out your hair by the roots and believe me they hurt!

Now anyway towards the end of my course as I was heading for graduation, a wonderful shift in attitude occured. My hair had by then reach down to my chest. The school had in effect adopted my personality, they actually grew to love my hair. They loved how my hair was always so unbelieveably healthy, strong, and shiny. (Well I don't bleach/color/or perm my hair to death so yeah of course it'd be a whole lot healthier than what they have on their heads!) Many of classmates would actually give earnest compliments on my hair, and after I graduated and came back to visit the school to catch up on my teachers I became a school celebrity. I'll chat up with some of the new students and give them pointers on the hardest parts of the State Exams.