WHAT am I doing wrong!?

[wissles]

I'm devastated. :(
today it's been four weeks since I cut my hair (about 3-4 cm) and I was so happy it had grown so fast!
But when I did a search and destroy today I noticed white dots - both in the very end and like 1 cm up- and split ends EVERYWHERE! It took me forever to go through everything, and I'm sure I've missed a lot.

I've done everything right.. I've used protein to build up my hair (and my hair didn't go crazy, it likes protein), I've used oil and moisture, I've used a leave-in that's supposed to keep the hair from splitting and breaking, I've been treating it nice, I've been wearing it up a lot, using UV protection, doing scalp massages...

the only bad thing I've done is that I used a flat iron like 4 times or so, and that I comb my hair a lot. Both fingercombing and with a comb, but a nice comb.

what on earth am I doing wrong? :(

[Xandergrammy]

Did you cut your hair yourself? What kind of scissors did you use?

[wissles]

Did you cut your hair yourself? What kind of scissors did you use?
Nope, I went to a hairdresser. But I'm using haircutting scissors when I'm doing search and destroy.

[Xandergrammy]

Nope, I went to a hairdresser. But I'm using haircutting scissors when I'm doing search and destroy.



Hmmmm... so both scissors should be nice and sharp.

I know that any kind of heat can be damaging, so maybe the flat iron did some damage? I'm sure some other members will have other ideas for you. Try not to get too stressed about it. Finding out what our hair likes best is a process that can take some time. :flowers:

[wissles]

Yeah, maybe it is the heat.. but just a few times shouldn't cause that much damage..

I really can't handle this. I've never ever felt so bad as I did one month ago when I cut my hair. I felt pure ugly and so naked and insecure, and everything felt hopeless. Now I'm used to it and it's grown a bit and I've really been taking care of it and then I notice this. It feels like it IS hopeless now, I've done everything I could but it's still not working.

[Misha]

Could it be past damage from handling, heat or chemical process? How long is your hair?

I wonder if the hairdresser's scissors were blunt and caused the splits (and that you would not know).

Perhaps you could consider trimming again at some point (maybe doing it yourself with a good scissors), and just SD yourself as you go along to clear up the damage.

[wissles]

Could it be past damage from handling, heat or chemical process? How long is your hair?

I wonder if the hairdresser's scissors were blunt and caused the splits (and that you would not know).

Perhaps you could consider trimming again at some point (maybe doing it yourself with a good scissors), and just SD yourself as you go along to clear up the damage.

It is damaged. A year ago I bleeched my hair from black to blonde in two days, but it failed so I had to bleech again, dye, bleech, highlight, highlight again. All this in two days.
And two months later I had more highlights done. And I've used sooo much heat.
But I cut it from my chest to my shoulders, and then a liittle shorter again. So it shouldn't be so much damage left.

The scissors may have been blunt, but that wouldn't cause the breakage 1 cm up from the end. so I doubt it. :(

[Carolyn]

My guess would be that it's past damage from the bleach and the continued use of a flat iron. By using the flat iron you are causing further damage to already damaged hair.

[Misha]

Hang in there and the damage will grow out with time. :)

Then with all the great info you've gathered here you will have lovely healthy long hair before you know it.

[florenonite]

I'm devastated. :(
today it's been four weeks since I cut my hair (about 3-4 cm) and I was so happy it had grown so fast!
But when I did a search and destroy today I noticed white dots - both in the very end and like 1 cm up- and split ends EVERYWHERE! It took me forever to go through everything, and I'm sure I've missed a lot.

I've done everything right.. I've used protein to build up my hair (and my hair didn't go crazy, it likes protein), I've used oil and moisture, I've used a leave-in that's supposed to keep the hair from splitting and breaking, I've been treating it nice, I've been wearing it up a lot, using UV protection, doing scalp massages...

the only bad thing I've done is that I used a flat iron like 4 times or so, and that I comb my hair a lot. Both fingercombing and with a comb, but a nice comb.

what on earth am I doing wrong? :(

Put down the flat iron. Walk away slowly. When the evil device is out of sight, run!

You cut your hair four weeks ago and have used a flat iron about four times since then, you say. That's once a week, which is quite often to be heat-styling your hair. You can have long healthy hair if you use one occasionally, but occasionally would be a few times a year, not a few times a month.

How much are you combing your hair? Once in the morning and once in the evening should be sufficient if you're wearing your hair up.

What are you doing with your hair in bed? Perhaps you're getting damage from that. Try plaiting it or something, or get a satin pillowcase or cap.

Also, you're using a leave-in that's meant to prevent splitting. I am certain such a product would contain 'cones. Perhaps your hair doesn't like 'cones. It took me ages of oscillating between 'cones and no-'cones to work out that my hair can handle 'cones as long as I use a sulphate shampoo without 'cones the next wash, and I shouldn't do it for extended periods of time. So it's fine to use 'cones when I'm at home for a few weeks because my sisters use 'cones and my wee sister also has a clarifying shampoo. It's not fine to go out and buy a bottle of 'coney conditioner for my hair for extended use, because then I get splits, as I discovered recently :rolleyes:. So I recommend clarifying your hair and going no-'cone for while. This will also allow the oil to penetrate better.

HTH!

[Niphredil]

I agree with florenonite.
I wanted to add though, that if your hair is really damaged inside (and it sounds like that with the repeated bleaching & dyeing), the new end that forms after you (or the hairdresser) cut a bit off is already damaged. I have had this in the past too. I could snip a split or white dot only to have a new white dot in its place.

I would guess that the only permanent solution would be to cut off all damage.
That probably is a bit drastic so you could try temporary solutions that smooth the length to prevent further damage and gradually trim the damage.

[ChloeDharma]

I think really you have answered your own question. It can take ages for damage to grow out, and if you are averaging once a week of flat ironing then that can be quite stressfull on your hair. Each time you flat iron it is likely that you are causing ruptures in the shaft of the hair.....the damage wont just be at the ends, but at any point of the shaft that comes into contact with the flat irons.
Products and deep treatments can't really repair hair, only make it look and feel better temporarily, once the hair is damaged that's it until it has grown out. It's the combination of gentle handling and growth with trims to remove damage that result in "healthy" hair in the long run.

My advice, like others have said, is to ditch the straighteners and baby your hair and give it time to grow out.
I've been through this too, growing out chemical damage and it was a nightmare, despite serious oilings, DT's with every wash, wearing my hair up constantly, no shampoo at all, regular hennas.....i still had unbelievable splits until i had removed all of the previously damaged hair.

[AnneAdeline]

My hair has been bleached twice, and so the ends are really bad. I S&D every once in a while, but not too often.
Not all splits are at the very ends of your hair, especially if it has been damaged. Maybe you just didn't notice these ones before?
Best of Luck

[wissles]

Thank you everyone, it probably is the previous damage. My hair used to be soooo strong before, even though I was treating it like crap with no knowledge. :rolleyes:
Cheap schampoos, no conditioner what-so-ever, over-brushing, hair bands with metal clips, blowdrying, heat styling with flat iron and curl iron, I would dry it with a towel like crazy and it looked like a huge bird nest. And still no split ends or damage at all.
But when I started bleeching it, oh gosh..

[misstwist]

Yeah, maybe it is the heat.. but just a few times shouldn't cause that much damage...

I think you have had plenty of input on what's going on with your hair, but I want to point out that just one occasion of heat styling can damage your hair quite badly.

My hair isn't damaged, but on the one or two occasions during the year I use a curling iron I have to s&d and smt afterward because my hair is suddenly badly split and showing those white bead-ish damaged areas. I rarely have splits otherwise.

[spidermom]

I only had heat-styling damage when I joined in 2005, nothing else, but it takes time to grow out/cut off the damage. And even if you do everything perfect, you're still going to get daily wear and tear. It can't be avoided. Your hair has to go everywhere you go, and not all of those places/conditions are hair friendly. Just do the best you can, enjoy your hair, and realize the only way to have perfect, undamaged hair is to keep it out of direct light and wind, and never wash, comb, or brush it. Perfection at this cost wouldn't be worth it.