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mediumhair
April 24th, 2009, 02:23 PM
My niece is in Kindergarden and her hair still hasn't grown past 2 inches. I convinced her mother to try some organic shampoo and conditioner and also different oil treatments. Her hair is very thick and slightly curly but a little on the dry side and it won't grow. She's been to several specialists and doctors and they haven't helped with anything. Now that they don't have health insurance I thought I would ask on here if there's anything herbal or natural to try with her hair. Her mom will not shave her to see if that will work because my niece is constantly in public and will not wear hats. Everyone else in the family has thick nice hair. Our family gets bugged a lot and even though we answer that we cut it this short it's getting to the point where some people are being cruel. And if you have a positive similar story please share or if you know what some medical problems could be.

jera
April 24th, 2009, 02:34 PM
Hi,

I went to grammar school with girl who had short hair that never grew. It was a genetic abnormality. Her whole family had thick black curly hair. She was blond and her hair was not only short but also thin and sparse. Her situation never did improve. I don't know though what her family did or did not do for her besides taking her to the doctor. She never took any meds for it that I know of.

I'm sorry you're receiving negativity from others because of this and I wish I could tell you something that I know would help but I honestly don't know what the cause of her lack of growth is so I don't want to diagnose and prescribe.

I think if there is a free clinic in your area it might be best to take her to a doctor to see if she's deficient in Human growth hormone or something similar. In the meantime, hugs. :) Just try to make her feel beautiful, valuable, and loved. She's probably aware that she's different and that can be such a blow to a kid's self esteem.

Peggy E.
April 24th, 2009, 02:35 PM
How awful for this poor girl and how cruel! It's one thing for kids to do the chiding, but quite another for adults to be chiming in on the ridicule.

This girl's parents need to stand up to anyone who says something about the hair and directly announce to them that the girl is beautiful, including her lovely blonde hair. And that any further hurtful, hateful and ignorant remarks referring to her appearance will not be tolerated.

There's no need to explain that she's seen doctors, specialists, anything - it's no one's business. But it is desperately important that this girl knows she is accepted, normal and beautiful as she is and that there is absolutely nothing wrong with her.

Her hair will grow in when it's supposed to and all this attention to the subject should be curtailed before the girl is so traumatized she'll be spending the remaining days of her life on some psychiatrist's couch trying to figure out how to accept herself.

Please, help this girl build the self-esteem and confidence she needs to succeed at whatever it is she wants to do in this life.

lora410
April 24th, 2009, 02:54 PM
My daughter had curly hair down to the tops her ears when she was 3; it recently just picked up. Had the doctors checked her thyroid? Also since she doesn't have insurance she may be able to get Medicaid. here I wasn't eligible for Medicaid but I am on a state plan that is 20$ a month. She can find out if there is one in her state by calling Medicaid. In my case they automatically sent me the papers.

Carolyn
April 24th, 2009, 02:55 PM
Ask the parents if her school has an anti-bullying policy. Her mother could talk to her teacher and make her aware of the situation if she already isn't. The teacher should be handling this in the classroom.

Carina
April 24th, 2009, 03:03 PM
My daughters hair began to grow when she was two years old.I often heard questions as to why she had short hair.I ignored it most of the time.It didn't bother my daughter so why me.

Nightshade
April 24th, 2009, 03:12 PM
Poor kiddo, that sucks. Doubly so when you're a girl and don't yet have the womanly curves to make your gender obvious despite the short hair.

Perhaps this thread that Jessie started on Essential Oils for Hair Loss and Shedding (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=2001)would be worth a read?

I know she had luck getting her husband's hair to regrow, and has a great summary of studies that have been done and links to other sites where this they may have more specific answers :flowers:

marialena
April 24th, 2009, 03:25 PM
I don't think that this little girl has something abnormal happen with her hair. I have a picture of me when I was 3 or 4 years old and shows me with my hair above my shoulders half straight and half curly.
When I was born I had curly hair and till the age of 4 my hair didn't grow long enough to loose their curls not even to pass my shoulder in length and my mom didn't cut them or shave them as well. My hair grow longer at the age of 6 and as you can see I have lot of hair in my head even now that I'm 40 years old. Have in mind that I was a very thin and little girl and perhaps this is one of the reasons that my hair didn't grow faster.
It would be wise to check out your niece's diet. Perhaps some more proteins and vitamins would help her hair grow and of course a very gentle hair routine with natural always products.

I don't know why this bulling happens to this Kindergarden but if I was this little girl's mother I would sue them for not taking care for such problems or I would send my child to another school.

In any case I don't think that your niece's hair have some problem and there's no reason for this girl to get traumatized because or her hair. Little girls are cute anyway, either with longer or with shorter hair and I'm sure that this girl can't be an exception. :)

Give her please many kisses from me.
"Hello sweetie.. I love you !!! ":blossom:

Flaxen
April 24th, 2009, 03:37 PM
I would strongly recommend against using any topical products on a five year old. That includes essential oils as are in many hair growth recipes. She's still just a baby, and her body is way too underdeveloped to handle products like that.

If her doctors say she's healthy, let her be. Please, please, please. The ones who have something wrong with them are the people who are questioning you and bullying her. They need to be fixed, not your beautiful little niece. There's nothing wrong with her, and most likely, her hair will grow in its own due time. Take Carolyn's and Peggy E.'s advice to heart, and then give the her hair some time. :grouphug: :flower:

ETA: I didn't suggest anything for her dry hair!:doh:

Try diluting her shampoo until it is very weak, or you might want to go the water only (WO). Here's (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=3412) the thread about that. It is also possible to clean hair perfectly well with conditioner only (CO). There's a nice article about that in the Articles Section. :grin:

Nightshade
April 24th, 2009, 03:46 PM
I would strongly recommend against using any topical products on a five year old. That includes essential oils as are in many hair growth recipes. She's still just a baby, and her body is way too underdeveloped to handle products like that.

Gahh, I meant to toss a disclaimer in there, but got sidetracked on another thread and thought I was done posting. It wasn't so much the advocating of putting stuff on her head, so much as I knew there were links to other sides that are more focused on hair loss and what causes it. :o

That said, my sister was literally BALD until she was almost 3 and now her hair is 3x as thick as mine. So sometimes all it takes is time.

In the short-term, though, perhaps some fun clip-ins or something as a pick me up in the short term?

Kids are nasty, and I doubt the bullying will stop 100% even if teachers are watchful... perhaps a talk with your niece about how when people bully its to make up for their own shortcomings, so she knows the issue is with THEM and not HER?

I've been bullied, and it sucks. I hope it stops :(

longhairedfairy
April 24th, 2009, 04:12 PM
I think my cousin K was pretty much bald until she was around three. Now she has blond hair that's probably at least twice the thickness of mine.

Anje
April 24th, 2009, 09:39 PM
I just want to throw out a "Don't shave her!" comment. Shaving hair does not make it grow, it just makes it shorter!

Curlsgirl
April 24th, 2009, 09:46 PM
Poor little thing! Bullying is not a small matter. It can contribute to all kinds of problems later and even if she seems fine you don't know that she is necessarily showing her feelings. You might also consider taking her to a counselor who is good with children to help her deal with this. The earlier she addresses any problem the easier it is to deal with and to prevent problems down the road :flower:

Give her a big hug please from Curlsgirl!!!!!!!

Peggy E.
April 25th, 2009, 10:08 AM
Ask the parents if her school has an anti-bullying policy. Her mother could talk to her teacher and make her aware of the situation if she already isn't. The teacher should be handling this in the classroom.

Kids are unbelievably cruel. I remember how far from reality a popular song from the long-ago - "Bless the Beasts and the Children" - how peaceful, loving they were towards each other!

Anyone watched National Geographic lately? Or watched little kids in a play situation?? "Peaceful and loving" it ain't!

The school needs to be made aware of the situation and it is their responsibility to protect this girl while she is there in their charge. Make sure the parents do this and they hold the school up to their end.

We've all seen the horrific, tragic results of childhood hazing and though the occasions where children have brought weapons to school to turn on their tormenters is limited, thank God, the treatment that causes such trauma is not.

Don't let the system in place to protect and care for this girl let her down! Make sure her parents demand her protection.

JamieLeigh
April 25th, 2009, 10:54 PM
It's horrible that the child is being teased for something that not only she, but her parents can't help. Kids are cruel sometimes, and unfortunately that's always the way it will be - there is always at least one kid in every class that will be teased, whether the teacher notices it or not. But having adults chiming in on it too could REALLY make this child feel insecure. If a medical problem has been ruled out, then it's probably a genetic thing - maybe some dormant gene - and hopefully she will grow out of it. If not, then I hope she has someone around her who will help her to feel beautiful for who she is, and make the most of her appearance. There are plenty of nice ways to wear extreme short hair, like scarves. :)

AutumnLeaves
April 26th, 2009, 07:04 AM
Yay for Flaxen's response. I might only add a bit of stimulation with a brush, even a baby brush might feel good to her scalp if nothing else. Could stimulate the hair too, maybe?

spidermom
April 26th, 2009, 09:26 AM
That's so strange that anybody would pick on her. Lots of kids in kindergarten have short hair. My DD had a pixie in kindergarten.

elliebean184
April 26th, 2009, 02:52 PM
Hi-
I had a similar problem as a kid. (My mom was awesome about it- I hardly worried about the mean kids.) My hair was superfine and nearly straight- then I decided to cut my own hair. It immediately turned curly and rough. I sincerely doubt it was an effect of the cutting- my hair has since cycled through three or four completely different textures and curl patterns. For me, it jut happens.
I'd give her hair more time and give her cupcakes and love.

ravenreed
April 27th, 2009, 08:23 PM
I just wanted to say that kids tease. I was teased horribly as a child about my name. I gave my sons really boring names thinking that it would solve the problem. Instead, my youngest is a red head, and has gotten teased nonstop about that.

It doesn't make it right. It is just how it is. Perhaps in addition to trying to figure how to deal with why the child's hair is so short, she might also do with a little confidence boosting so that when she is teased, she won't react and thus reduce the likelihood of future teasing.

HairColoredHair
April 27th, 2009, 08:46 PM
Considering the typical hair lengths in kindergarten, I'd say the bullies are having more fun with how your niece reacts to teasing than her hair at all.

Maybe because she's been taught her hair is 'bad' she's taking it poorly?

Tangles
April 27th, 2009, 09:15 PM
That's so strange that anybody would pick on her. Lots of kids in kindergarten have short hair. My DD had a pixie in kindergarten.

I thought the same thing. How would they know it wasn't intentionally that way? At that age most girls at my school had bob cuts, not long hair.

earthdancer
April 28th, 2009, 08:17 AM
Considering the typical hair lengths in kindergarten, I'd say the bullies are having more fun with how your niece reacts to teasing than her hair at all.

Maybe because she's been taught her hair is 'bad' she's taking it poorly?

Great comment! Her family should be teaching her that kids do tease - about anything and everything! It's just a fact. If it wasn't her hair, they would pick on something else. It isn't personal, it's their entertainment, and it's unavoidable. Developing a good attitude about it now will serve her well her whole life. Believe me, I know! I was teased as a child, and then all through high school, and now my husband is merciless! Looking back at what I was teased about in high school, I realize that yes, they liked my reaction. What they actually teased about (like my weight) had absolutely no bearing on reality at all. In grade school I was underweight, and by high school I was a perfect weight with an amazing figure back then (no brag, I have my mother to thank for those genes). For example one time, a boy gave me a cartoon picture of a hippo wearing a tutu saying that's what I looked like (we were 16 years old). I didn't understand at the time, but my friends let me know that the teasing didn't mean anything and I was being stupid for taking it seriously, so I didn't. I got over it because my friends let me know that it was no big deal.

On the other hand, my husband's niece is beautiful, and now a semi-professional singer. She was teased in school about being pretty(!) and her family made such an awful fuss about it that she developed an ulcer and they ended up home-schooling her. Her family acted like teasing was a horrible cruel torture, so she reacted to it that way. A completely unnecessary trauma/drama! For a father to sputter and strut around angrily saying things like, "Nobody's going to tease MY daughter" didn't help, it just made her more upset about the experience. After all, you can't stop the teasing, since they'll do it off school grounds if they get in trouble at school for it, plus they'll be mad at her for getting them in trouble. You can only arm the child with a good attitude about it and give her self-confidence. You yourself can help a lot by telling her how pretty her thick curly hair is, and making other nice comments about her appearance, intelligence, etc. Such comments may even be more effective coming from you, someone other than her parents!

Getting teased is part of growing up. The more you act like it's horrible and unjust, the more that little girl will be hurt by it. Act like it's no big deal; and it isn't unless you make it a big deal. Tell her that those kids are just pathetic (or goofy, or sad, or desparate for something to do) and deserve to be ignored, even pitied for their lack of imagination!

Her hair sounds fine; thick, curly hair that's 2" long sounds cute, not strange-looking at all. A lot of parents keep their kids' thick, curly hair short on purpose for ease of care. I'm willing to bet that some of those same kids have hair cuts that are just as short or shorter.

Curlsgirl
April 28th, 2009, 12:44 PM
Getting teased is part of growing up. The more you act like it's horrible and unjust, the more that little girl will be hurt by it. Act like it's no big deal; and it isn't unless you make it a big deal. Tell her that those kids are just pathetic (or goofy, or sad, or desparate for something to do) and deserve to be ignored, even pitied for their lack of imagination!


Unfortunately you can TELL a child all day long things like this and they have little effect. This is her whole WORLD in her eyes and from her little experience it is very difficult to understand OUR perspective. I am not disagreeing but just want to emphasize, there are varying degrees of "abuse" and yes it can be abuse and it can cause lasting damage and in some situations very deep scars. Parents can do a lot but sometimes professional counseling can prove to be very VERY beneficial. I am a counselor by the way. I am not pushing this because of that but because I have seen the emotional damage that can be brought into adulthood.

heidi w.
April 28th, 2009, 01:02 PM
I would imagine this is a genetically based issue. Seeing just a primary care physician may not be enough for figuring this one out.

Any other symptoms regarding her health?

If hair won't grow, you have to find out the reason. Most programs are based on a "baldness" issue which is a certain type of scenario that some programs overcome with moderate effectiveness.

I would look into forms of alopecia. There are a variety of types. Is she missing hair anywhere else on her body? Arms, legs?

heidi w.

heidi w.
April 28th, 2009, 01:06 PM
If she's in Kindgergarten, I imagine one could at least speak to the teacher(s) and have them assist with amending the teasing at school problem.

Perhaps some kind of class presentation on being nice to others and how words can hurt -- presented to the whole class, will be useful? This way, she isn't again singled out as, "Now everyone, it's not ok to tease Mandy"

Now the other kids will declare they're not teasing Mandy and keep it up.

Part of the responsibility of teasing too much at school is up to teachers to interrupt and teach better ways. In this age group, this is typically a very solveable problem at school. This goes under the rules of this classroom chart. Kids this age can understand more than us adults might expect.

This includes on the playground.

Like when they role play house...ok Mandy, you be the Dad because you look like one.

That's hurtful.

Most children are taught some kind of behavior in school, and if teachers allow it this is then their complicity in the problem so far as it goes on at school.

A private discussion with the teacher may be in order. Sometimes other adults are not aware that teasing is taken so emotionally. In private, teachers have their own teasing and comments they make about kids which I was never a fan of and found quite disturbing, and can contribute to the problem because through silence they agree with the kid that is teasing or agree that the kid is funny.

heidi w.

heidi w.
April 28th, 2009, 01:12 PM
If you shave her head it probably won't work because this is most likely genetically based, and then she gets to be teased for that too!

I say, decorate her hair with little bows and clippy things and sparkly things--use ribbons and headbands!

A cute little barrette, really tiny, will help her feel better, likely, too!

2 inches is long enough to put a barrette on one side of the head...or you could do two teensy barrettes, one below the other, slightly offset.

Or take a swirl of hair and tie the thinnest little ribbon around it. With black hair it could be red or green -- how cute!

And make sure she wears girl clothes if she identifies that way. Little bobby sox with lace trim, that kind of thing. Jewelry over her little top if wearing cute slacks set.

heidi w.

ChloeDharma
April 28th, 2009, 04:00 PM
If you shave her head it probably won't work because this is most likely genetically based, and then she gets to be teased for that too!

I say, decorate her hair with little bows and clippy things and sparkly things.

A cute little barrette, really tiny, will help her feel better, likely, too!

2 inches is long enough to put a barrette on one side of the head...or you could do two teensy barrettes, one below the other, slightly offset.

Or take a swirl of hair and tie the thinnest little ribbon around it. With black hair it could be red or green -- how cute!

And make sure she wears girl clothes if she identifies that way. Little bobby sox with lace trim, that kind of thing. Jewelry over her little top if wearing cute slacks set.

heidi w.

Absolutely, i was thinking of the cute little hair bands and accessories that can be worn in the hair too.
It does sound odd that this poor little girl is being teased when her description actually sounds adorable!
I would also suggest not using essential oils at her age without a huge amount of reading up on contraindications and safety regarding them.
For a treatment i'd use a simple oil like coconut, sesame or similar.....something edible so that you can be confident it's safe. I wouldn't suggest to the girl that it's to make hair grow, just in case it doesn't work.....but i'd use the time gently massaging her scalp with it as bonding time....if it improves her hair.....fabulous, if not.....well hopefully making her feel pampered will help her feel extra valued and loved.

heidi w.
April 29th, 2009, 08:46 AM
Generally speaking, oiling is not for improving hair growth! It's for improving hair's integrity so it doesn't break off or become dry and brittle.

This part is really important: children's hair is VERY different from adult hair.

Children's hair, up to about age 7-10, is typically rather baby fine, downy soft, and not incredible in the growth rate area.

If this little girl is in a family that has longer tresses, then the value system in the family is longer tresses somehow. She needs to hear that her hair length is fine.

If she's been carted to doctors for lack of growth, then she definitely has the message that she's not "normal" and that something is "wrong" with her, which makes the kids teasing much harder to take because in her little head she thinks they're right.

So the message to work on with this child is that she's utterly "normal", that she's beautiful because the powers that be made her this way, and she's fine. At 5 she has a smaller capacity to "reason" all this out and not take things personally. Everything is still quite personal at age 5.

While there may well be something up genetically, there are plenty of people in the world who are unable to have overly long tresses for reasons of genetics that are actually in the range of "normal". I have met many people who are unable to grow beyond a certain length--that is their genetic situation.

The hair's texture, perhaps even color, even the degree of curl or body, may well change in time.

Meanwhile the best you can do is help her enjoy her body, feel positive about her body, and teach her some sayings and attitudes when kids tease her. And yes, I would talk to the teacher because if she's being teased mercilessly, then other kids are too and the school is allowing this most unpleasant behavior, and they have a level of responsibility for teaching kids appropriate behavior while on their property and under their tutelage. They are then the adults in the room and responsible for these kids' care, and for laying down the social rules by which all kids and adults will function.

Meanwhile, dark downy soft curls with little pink or purple plastic bow barrettes, or small glittery clips holding tufts of hair -- how adorable and girly is that!

The family can help to send a different message to this child.
heidi w.

heidi w.
April 29th, 2009, 08:54 AM
And for heaven's sake, don't shave this kids head and send her out in the world. She'll be mortified, I expect, and the adults in her purview will have exagerrated the problem and once again sent the message something is wrong with her. They're making her the problem.

The problem is the adults in the room, not this child. They're teaching her that something is wrong.

It's ok to have short hair! At any age, even if a girl.

Cut or shape into something more "feminine", perhaps, or play with a side part. I can think of all kinds of ideas to do with little girl hair. I would talk to her and ASK HER what she wants. Anyone try that? (Short of she wants longer hair....)

Teach her acceptance. This is done by the family around her accepting what is, and not trying to create something that isn't. I daresay that perhaps some of the adults in her purview have some ideas about "gender" and what a girl "looks" like ....if she is this way, then some amendment of attitudes by adults in her purview is in order. She will get her strongest messages from them, at this point.

Allow me to explain. My mother was for many eras of her life quite overweight. As a child I never understood my mother to be "fat" or anything wrong. I simply saw her as my mother and in my eyes she was gloriously beautiful. It was she and other adults and society who taught me that my mother was fat. And even then I repulsed the idea. My mother is beautiful.

That's what I mean. Kids learn from who teaches them. Change the message and she'll be a beautiful, happy little girl totally capable of defending herself.

The adults need more help than she does!

In psychology we call this the "identified patient" -- this child is the "identified patient" but in reality, the problem is not with this child -- it's with those in her purview who are telling her she's the problem, when she isn't. Even IF it's a genetic disorder and turns out to not be "normal" -- she's still beautiful.

I hope this viewpoint helps.
heidi w.

heidi w.
April 29th, 2009, 08:56 AM
FYI - any hair growth vitamins or programs you might hear of, I would not put a child of 5 on. Why? Those programs are intended for adults with a much higher body mass/weight, and thus absorption is different. PLUS applying those dosages to a child's body can actually be considered toxic levels for a child with a much lower body mass/weight.


heidi w.

tina1025
April 29th, 2009, 09:36 AM
I feel extremely sorry for your niece (hugs and kisses). I agree with everything Heidi W. has mentioned here.

I had very thin and short hair when i was younger....here are some pics so you can see it....I dont know how old i was but i am pretty sure i was in kindergarden. I dont even remember having that short hair. I dont even remember what other kids hair looked like. So i dont understand why your niece is being picked on.


Sorry if the pics are too big.

http://i191.photobucket.com/albums/z79/tina102582/9f71.jpg
http://i191.photobucket.com/albums/z79/tina102582/6755.jpg
http://i191.photobucket.com/albums/z79/tina102582/573c.jpg