feeling rubbish hairwise

[goldenbrunette]

i seem to be surrounded by lots of stunning girls with long thick hair where i live, and they don't do much to care for it! these girls live off junk, drink alot and smoke. and the straighten, curl and dye their hair. it makes me think that maybe im trying too hard. and another thing their hair seems to grow so so fast whilst mine is taking foreverrrrr :(

[templeofvenus]

I am the same to be honest, I have very fine hair and I think when I see some girls with long very thick hair it is extensions! obviously some have thier own hair and lucky them!!! I wish mine was like rapunzel but I really feel we have to be happy with what we have got and take care of it and enjoy having our own individual hair :) I bet yours looks great anyway we are our own worst critics!:) I am the worlds harshest critic of myself too.

[Speckla]

Their hair probably looks good because of the products they use. Have you ever seen what it looks like when they first wake up and before they apply products to style?

Your hair will stay healthy for a lifetime because you take care of it. Years of hair abuse will show over time and can't be corrected. I'm sure your hair is beautiful just like it is.

[rags]

I used to be insanely jealous of my SIL's insanely thick, long curly hair. She got a perm every six months or so, and I couldn't believe how good her hair still looked. Then I saw her one day sick, right out of the shower. Her hair was horriblly damaged, dry and frizzy with practically no defined curl, just lots of fuzz. We got to talking about hair and she said it took an hour and LOTS of products to get the hair I though she had naturally! So don't be too jealous - I agree with Speckla, yours will look better in the long run!

[RancheroTheBee]

They probably don't have great hair. When I was in high school, I dyed, ironed and blow-dried my hair all the time. I ate terrible food (if I ate at all), smoked (though didn't drink), and generally treated myself like crap. And my hair looked alright. From a distance.

See, since I was flat ironing it, it made the cuticle temporarily lie flat, and the products I used made it look shiny and healthy. That said, if you raked your fingers through my hair, chunks of broken hair would come off into your hands. It was really quite awful. It wasn't until about last year that I cut all that stuff out and started treating my hair well.

Now, like you, I always feel jealous that my friends have perfect, sleek hair that seems to grow like a weed. But I know what they do to it, and I know what kind of effect that sort of treatment has on hair.

See, you aren't going to have to go crying to your stylist because your hair is breaking off near the roots. You're going to get to have long, healthy hair for as long as you please for your hard work.

PS: Hair always seems to grow faster on other people. It's a fallacy. You're staring at your hair every morning in the mirror, but you only notice their hair every once in a while. Plus, even if their hair is growing faster, they still don't have healthier hair than you!

[Heidi_234]

Over here there are plenty of girls (young women if you wish, 20 somethings) have long long hair. It's quite common to see someone with waist length or hip length, and BCL and tailbone are not such a rare sight. Classic and beyond are still indeed exotic and uncommon, but I think that's because people just have no idea hair can grow that long on practically anybody.
They dye they hair, they s&c it probably daily with harsh SLSes and heavy suffocating cones, and shamelessly use silicone serums to make it nice every day. They heat style it and bleach highlights in it. They wear it down all the time, or else they tie it in a plain ponytail with ouch-ful hair elastic.
It really made me wonder if we are being overprotective. Wearing it up 99% of the time, careful with the hair products, not brushing, stretching showers just to avoid wetting it on more time, looking all over for natural hair care alternatives, doing everything possible to replace that shampoo, obsessively checking ingredients for cones, taking gazillion pills a day to make sure we get all our vitamins and other goodies, not going to the swimming pool because it's bad for the hair, not working out because it make it necessary to take a shower...
I exaggerating a little bit, but for the most part that's pretty much true. I wanted to start a thread about it, but then I answered myself. Those girls, they are not planning to grow their hair super long. We do. Our hair is here to stay, and we are very conscious about it. those girls just happen to grow it long without noticing, and when they grow older, they will just hack it off (Long haired women, on the other hand, are quite a rare sight here too. It's like a rule, when you approach your 30's, cut your hair short).
So, don't feel bad. You know better, and you know it. This journey to long hair land should be a fun one, you should enjoy every day of it. And when you'll be there, you'll know that your hair's healthier than theirs for sure, and hence requires less pricey products to look just as good if not better.

[goldenbrunette]

thanks for your comments ppl

that last comment, well i only ever wear my air down or in a ponytail..i figured it would be less harsh than using clips n things. i also shampoo and use serums, is this okay? i dont dye it and leave it to hairdry..? but i like my hair in a ponytail!

[Heidi_234]

thanks for your comments ppl

that last comment, well i only ever wear my air down or in a ponytail..i figured it would be less harsh than using clips n things. i also shampoo and use serums, is this okay? i dont dye it and leave it to hairdry..? but i like my hair in a ponytail!
Well, as you notice, your hair grows whether you treat it nicely or not, so if you're comfortable with something you do with your hair, by all means do it.
The thing with ponytail is that when you put hair elastic on the same place again and again it may stress the hair and cause it to break very far from your ends where you can trim the damage away. If you don't tie it too tight, use merciful elastics (cloth/satin/other scrunchies are even better, but soft elastics with no metal could work too), don't pull it tight by parting your ponytail, and of course, if you don't notice breakage then you'll be just fine. Again, it's the overprotectiveness of LHC that made me see ponytails as evil evil beings, even though I like it the most. I personally use wide banana clips as ponytail substitute when I feel like wearing it like a ponytail.
About shampoo and serums, these's not really right and wrong, some poeple are better off shampoo (like me, I shedded like crazy while using it), some can't go without. Learn how your hair reacts to different things, and you'll know what's good for it. Same goes with cones (what makes serum work). IMHO, when it comes to hair care, less is more, so if I can replace a treatment with milder one or stop doing it alltogether, then it's probably for the better. But you better figure out your own 'hair zen'. :flower:

[littlemiss]

I get jealous of all the beautiful hair here on the forum, but...... I know with time and patience that too maybe me one day!! :dreaming:

[rach]

i knew someone who had long blonde hair and permed it, i loved it, she ran moose through it to make the lovely ringlets. i was so jealous, then a few months later she gave up and her hair was pure frizz and it looked awful, she had to grow it all out. i realized i was better off with what i had. it's just people spending allot of time and patience with instant results. better off looking after your hair properly rather than the mask affect i say.

[jera]

i seem to be surrounded by lots of stunning girls with long thick hair where i live, and they don't do much to care for it! these girls live off junk, drink alot and smoke. and the straighten, curl and dye their hair. it makes me think that maybe im trying too hard. and another thing their hair seems to grow so so fast whilst mine is taking foreverrrrr :(

I understand your frustration, but teenage hair has more moisture, so it resists a lot of the terrible things teenage girls do to it. :p Over time the healthy hair habits you acquire here will pay dividends.

[JamieLeigh]

I agree with the advice the others have given in this thread. Just remember that they are not taking care of their hair by doing all of the horrible things they do, and it will eventually either be broken off or cut into this or that trendy short hairstyle. And then you will be the one left with long, healthy, beautiful hair for THEM to envy. :D

[pdy2kn6]

just rest assured knowing that your insides are alot healthier than theirs, and the natural condition of your hair is likely to be so much better than theirs, who probably use tonnes of products/cones to make their hair look good, even though im sure it is damaged as hell from all the things they put it through, drinking, smoking, straightening etc.

[rach]

I agree with the advice the others have given in this thread. Just remember that they are not taking care of their hair by doing all of the horrible things they do, and it will eventually either be broken off or cut into this or that trendy short hairstyle. And then you will be the one left with long, healthy, beautiful hair for THEM to envy. :D

well said :rockerdud