To dye or not to dye? Ashbrown with Whities

[AngelInDisguise]

http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/picture.php?albumid=2629&pictureid=32875

O.k., so I have some silvery white hair - and it's getting more and more. (More pics: http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/album.php?albumid=2629

But: I don't really mind. The whites are shiny and silvery and apart from that they are a bit unruly I like them better than my natural haircolor.

On the pictures the color is a bit lighter as in RL, but it really is a stray dog's color, rather grayish and boring. This is why I usually dyed my hair in some red, dark brown or black.

Now that I let it grow out again I think about sticking to my natural color as doing the herbal coloring takes a lot of time and will be harder to do when the hair gets longer.

Hubby says it would make me look older and would prefer me to keep coloring. And as I don't love my natural haircolor anyway .... I am so indetermined!

Any opinions?

[Rohele]

Our hair looks so similar.

I don't have much advice to give, except to say I'm struggling with the same decision as you are.

I stopped dying a few month ago because I was accumulating damage and also didn't want the upkeep on really long hair. I was dying it really close to my natural colour, but as its growing out I'm realizing just how ashy my hair looks (I seem to remember a lot more red it it, but I haven't seen my "real" hair for about 10 yrs.). The whites are starting to come in, but not enough for nice streaks yet. What really bothers me the most is the tone of the other hairs - I've got mousy brown hair it seems. I would love to find something that could give me temporary warm tones - I don't want anything permanent that I'll have to consider growing out later, when its long.

[Anje]

Not much advice to give. You could always mess with those supposedly quick-to-rinse out deposit-only dyes when you want to alter the color a bit, and you won't have to deal with so much commitment or roots. Since grays are stubbornly hard to color, you might even end up with a different base with the silvers still sparkling in there.

[Sunshine69]

It sounds like you don't really want to color your hair. I don't think there's anything wrong with the color, and you're right that the greys are very bright and pretty.

You mentioned herbal hair coloring. What have you been doing to color your hair? Some people use honey to lighten/brighten their hair, cassia can be used to give grey and mousy hair a more golden hue, and chamomile can also be used to lighten hair. I don't know if any of those options would work for you, or if they are too much of a hassel. Anyway, I think your hair looks fine how it is and you'll probably get more greys eventually.:)

[rosie91]

don't dye it! that's my natural colour too and i want to stop dying it. so keep it!

[RancheroTheBee]

You seem pretty torn. I would suggest exercising the three-week rule and sitting on it for a little bit longer.

[teela1978]

I finally grew out my dye (well most of it, I think). My hair is pretty close in color to yours, light ash brown with some grays coming in. I'm actually finding my natural hair color to bring out my eyes more, and its much shinier than my hair ever was dyed. How far along are you in growing it out? Or is it all your natural color already?

[Katze]

Don't dye it! I also have a similar color, with a streak of silver coming in (see profile pic). Our hair color is rare because it is seen as "boring" and most women dye or bleach it, but I happen to think mine suits my eye and skin color much better than bleached blonde ever did. After years of dyeing, I am really liking my natural hair color for the first time since I was a kid.

If you really don't want to keep the whites, you can consider some natural dyes - look in the Herbal Haircare and in the Articles sections.

But I think our color hair (what I call "hair colored hair") with whites or greys or silver looks good, because it fits with the bluish undertone.

[jivete]

I'm having a similar dilemma, although my hair is a little darker. I'd really like to darken it if I could or get rid of the reddish ends. There's such a contrast between ash colors and reddish colors.

I would suggest something to brighten up the hair if you want. I think Cassia is a good idea. I know while I don't mind my natural color, it can look a little dull.

[Elphie]

My natural hair color now is similar to yours. Every few months I use a demi permanent (Wella Color Charm from Sally's) in a shade that is richer and closer to the color I had ten years ago. There isn't a demarcation line and I don't find it to be damaging.

[heidihug]

I have naturally dark ashy brown hair with graying around my face. It used to be dark brown with auburn-ish tendencies. But it has washed out a lot as I have aged. So now I color so I have something similar to my old color back. Ash brown makes me look aged and washed out.

However, I think the color of your light ash brown hair is lovely, and is soft enough that your grays/whites blend in quite well. I would leave it be, if I were you. You can always do a non-permanent color if you still are dissatisfied with it after a bit.

[AngelInDisguise]

Oh dear, I really am an Internet-Dummy - couldn't find this thread again. How embarrassing!

I did not mean to be rude by not answering such a long time.

Thank you all for your kind replies and hints!

I have - almost - made up my mind to stay natural. I finally decided not to dye in March and then think about my goals again in April.

What torments me most is that I have really hated my natural color for such a long time, believing that it is ugly and boring that it's so hard to overcome. Funny thing is that I heartily think that Katze is right - it's a rather seldom color nowadays and I really love the ash-colored hair of others.

[lapushka]

My whites look almost like yours, I about have the same amount (slightly less) and have about the same haircolor, if not the same (pics in sig are in artificial light, too bad).

I just leave them alone, in frequency compared to how many I have, they actually fall out faster than the colored hairs. So I'm not panicking yet.

Before this, it took me ages to grow out my applied hair color, I am not going back to that any time soon. Not until there's more whites. It's nasty having to color every few months and having to deal with outgrowth (that's worse than a few white hairs!).

Your hubby, however nicely meant, can't make a decision about your appearance. It's your call. After all, it's your hair.

[LutraLutra]

What torments me most is that I have really hated my natural color for such a long time, believing that it is ugly and boring that it's so hard to overcome. Funny thing is that I heartily think that Katze is right - it's a rather seldom color nowadays and I really love the ash-colored hair of others.
I felt like that for years. :( I wished it was darker, blonder, redder anything except for "hair coloured hair". I must have spend a fortune on hair dye/highlights etc. I know how hard it is to deal with such a big negative thing, all I can say is that it just takes time. Focus on the condition of your hair, then one day you'll notice how pretty hair coloured hair is, how it suits your skintone better than any dye, how it brings out the colour of your eyes. :)

[Monchhichi]

Don't dye!

I know many people in their mid 40s, who are tired of dyeing all the time. But on the other hand they also fear that if they suddenly stop colouring it would look terrible until the dye has grown out completely. And most people regret that they started dyeing 10 or 15 years ago.

[Honey39]

I dye, I'm afraid. Well, rather I highlight/lowlight - I put through about three different colours, and the greys are dyed out or blend in. I've recently swapped to darker, redder shades, and it looks fab. I've been growing my hair for the last year, and I've not noticed any damage yet from the dye, I have it trimmed (1/2 inch) every three months, and it's just below bsl now.

I dunno, I'm 40, but I am NOT ready to go grey; it's a very personal thing, isn't it? To me, on me, it will look very ageing - although I love it on others. It's not something I'm ready for yet - and I don't see this changing for a very long time.

I think your hair looks lovely, but I do understand the dilemma. Since I stopped putting lighter colours in and went for darker shades, the damage seems non-existent. It's the only 'bad' thing I do - no hair dryer, no shampoo, lots of oils and deep treatments etc (the stuff that works for me!) and my hair is in the best shape of its life! But yeah, it's a tough choice to make, especially if you have darker hair, the contrast is sharper. I think blond/grey is a subtler transition.

[ktani]

It is a very personal decision. The only thing that really matters, IMO, is that whatever you decide, you are comfortable with. There are ways to reduce any hair damage. You have to live with the decision of whether to colour or not, regardless of the opinions of others.

[MadPirateBippy]

I think it's a lovely, mellow color and I would be in awe of it long and untouched by dye, but you know, I'm a huge fan of silvers. :)

Let it grow!

[spidermom]

I agree - it's such a personal decision. Do what makes you feel the best.

[Treecrown]

I agree with "do what makes you feel best" and/but I also agree with the comments that your natural hair color (even with the grey and even if it has "dulled" over the years) will match your skin tones and eye color best, especially for those of us with "hair-colored hair," I think, because it's hard to find a dye option (natural or otherwise) that matches our subtle coloring.

I had been using henna/cassia glosses for a couple of years in an attempt to brighten up my hair color and blend my grays, but now that I'm letting my natural color grow back, I can see how much better it looks.

On the Salt and Pepper thread, there's lots of discussion about working with the colors you wear, make-up, jewelry, etc, to keep from looking or feeling washed out as the color of your hair changes.