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Peter
January 12th, 2009, 09:09 PM
It's kind of embarrassing making this thread, but I figured maybe someone else here has felt the same way. Basically, I love how my hair looks, but I really dislike how it looks in a ponytail/braided pigtails/single braid unless I'm wearing a tuque, in which case I like how it looks. I place very little value, if any, on what other people think, which is why I didn't hesitate to wear pigtails because I liked them (with a tuque, that is), but if I don't like how a certain style looks, I'm very uncomfortable like that in public.

This is pretty inconvenient in the summer because it gets pretty hot where I live. I'd like to wear braids and such but I just feel so uncomfortable. I don't know if it's because of the social opinion on men wearing "feminine" styles or because I genuinely think I look silly, but either way, I'm not sure what to do.

I know it sounds like I just have no backbone and can't just do what I want, but this has been bugging me lately. I'd like to hear everyone's opinions on this, especially those who have encountered this before.

TIA,
Peter

Dianyla
January 12th, 2009, 09:14 PM
Is it long enough to make into a bun yet? trolleypup usually wears his hair up in a nice masculine bun. :)

Bene
January 12th, 2009, 09:18 PM
loose bun in a chopstick. i've seen dudes wearing them, and it's incredibly masculine.

Kirin
January 12th, 2009, 09:19 PM
my husband is growing out his hair, its not incredibly long yet, but he goes for the single low pony in the back. He intends the single braid down the back when its longer.

Peter
January 12th, 2009, 09:27 PM
It's just past APL, which I think is long enough for a bun. I can twist the hair fine, but can't get the hairstick to stay and the bun falls out. I think I just need practice. Thanks for the suggestion. :)

The thing I don't like about all these "up" styles is how I look from the front. My hair lays all flat on top of my head. I tried searching but couldn't find anything.

Gumball
January 12th, 2009, 09:39 PM
It could just be a personal hurdle. It's sounded like you don't mind wearing all sorts of styles, but don't like showing your whole head in them because at least something about it is bugging you. I used to always wear my hair down for various reasons, but eventually I just jumped over that gap and started wearing my hair up. Since you don't place much stock on how others feel about your hair, then really it is all on your shoulders. If some things aren't comfortable for you yet then no worries. Don't do it. If you have styles that are comfortable to you and you feel great about wearing in public then go for it. Hair, whichever dimension of it you look at, is a personal evolution in itself.

Darkhorse1
January 12th, 2009, 09:43 PM
I've always found a ponytail on a guy just fine! I mean, it's your hair and your comfort. I know it's hard because there is such a predjudice to men with long hair. Perhaps fiddle with a few styles that you are comfortable with?

Ash
January 12th, 2009, 10:26 PM
Perhaps a half up or 3/4 up could help? It would at least get most of the hair out of the way and feel cooler than all of it being loose. Hair loosely wrapped around your head would possibly fit under a hat. A low ponytail banded a few times down the length is pretty masculine. I'm not sure what you mean by your hair being flat on your head, but a center (or side) part might help instead of pulling it straight back?

angelic
January 12th, 2009, 10:42 PM
This is pretty inconvenient in the summer because it gets pretty hot where I live. I'd like to wear braids and such but I just feel so uncomfortable. I don't know if it's because of the social opinion on men wearing "feminine" styles or because I genuinely think I look silly, but either way, I'm not sure what to do.


Looking at your avatar I can only imagine how lovely your hair would look braided. I love braids, whether it is one braid or two, and do not see braids as a "feminine" style at all. At the same time, I do live in a town that has a fairly large population of Native Canadians and a lot of the Native Canadian men I see in my town wear their hair long and in braids or banded ponytails. I can relate as I prefer to wear my own hair down and don't really like the way I look when it is braided (due more to the fact that I look young for my age and look even younger when my hair is tied back), but I have many people tell me how nice my hair looks when it is up. I am sure that you probably get the same compliments when you braid your hair. You have the "type" of hair that I envy and without seeing it in a braid, I can tell you that it looks amazing.

Pierre
January 12th, 2009, 10:52 PM
My favorite style on hot summer days is two Dutch braids, one just behind each ear to shield the carotids from the sun. I also make two buns, one behind each ear, or a single bun held with a hairscroo.

skay
January 12th, 2009, 10:54 PM
Hi Peter,

Here are more insights:

Overall, I agree with what everyone says - go with what makes you feel comfortable.

In addition to that, I recently ran across some photos of a guy with 2 braids and he looked great in them. Perhaps they may be of interest to you.

He looks masculine to me and the braids don't seem strange. Rather, it seems cool :cool::



Overall - I think he looks great!!

PHOTO links below

1. 3 photos on this page (Note: These photos take you to a page on raw food website : a website discussing health and produce (not raw-meat in case or anything else in case you're hesitant on clicking on the link).

http://www.welikeitraw.com/rawfood/2008/07/service---rated.html

Nice ninja outfit in the 3rd pic!

2. Photo: I think he's looking sharp in his formal suit/outift (he's the shorter one):

www.flickr.com/photos/dhrumil/2470167313/ (http://www.flickr.com/photos/dhrumil/2470167313/)

XeniaR
January 12th, 2009, 11:21 PM
Long hair on men is actually part of the heritage of my faith. Some men make a vow not to cut their hair. Our Bishop is one of these men and his long braid looks very nice down his back, even though the top of his hair is thinning and it is flat to his head. (Of course, he wears a hat outside to prevent sunburn, but the hat also looks really good on him.)

You need to do what works for you personally, but it is my opinion that a braid down a man's back is very macho to me. (Just don't use a pink rubber band. :p )

Nat242
January 12th, 2009, 11:28 PM
You've got to go with what you're comfortable with, but really, it's all about attitude. Your hair would look great braided or in a bun, and it makes growing your hair much easier.

Here's my partner sporting a simple cinnabun held with a long nail - since then I got some custom made hairsticks for him from Nightshade's Etsy store that are simple, elegant, and "manly".

http://i229.photobucket.com/albums/ee68/trippywallpaper/DSCN2800-1.jpg

MusingFrog
January 12th, 2009, 11:48 PM
The thing I don't like about all these "up" styles is how I look from the front. My hair lays all flat on top of my head. I tried searching but couldn't find anything.

With practice you can make the hair on your head "fluff" a bit, it certainly doesn't have to be flat against your head. Mine only lays flat when my hair is oily. What you might try doing is making the bun/braid/whatever then using the handle of a comb, lift the hair on the top of your head to lessen the flatness.

purplebubba
January 13th, 2009, 12:57 AM
It's been awhile since I've answered some of the older threads about styles for guys. But since then I've been thinking that a good option for us would probably be rope braids.
I don't wear braids of any sort myself but I may someday.

I did do a rope braid one time a few years back to get pics for the style of the month / week threads.

It wasn't perfect
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v158/purplebubba/PB2/rope1.jpg
After a little fix
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v158/purplebubba/PB2/rope2.jpg

Katze
January 13th, 2009, 02:44 AM
Great hairstyles!

I was trying to find a pic of my BF with a French braid, but couldn't. French braiding does take some practice, but it holds really well (he likes it under his Viking helmet for padding and to keep it out of his eyes) and it is the #1 hairdo he asks me for. Very often I do a herringbone French braid as this looks more masculine on him, and sometimes he gets a braided half-up.

Something like this without the small side braid:

http://www.dreamweaverbraiding.com/braids/legolas.htm

And yes, you CAN do this on your own! I can, and I am a total hairdo dummie!

One night we went to a relatively formal party and BF wore a black turtleneck, black jeans, and a black blazer, and I braided his hair in a normal French braid. He looked intellectual, serious, and very masculine.

I'm working on getting him to do buns, but he usually only does them for messy work to keep his hair off his neck. Otherwise, it's ponytail, ponytail, ponytail (boring!)

Elphie
January 13th, 2009, 03:19 AM
Hi Peter,

I think a few things come into play here, the first one being age. I know, as I got older, I cared less and less how people viewed me (or my hair for that matter) and considering you're already not terribly concerned with that, you're way ahead of me when I was your age!

The second thing is it takes some time to feel confident with change. I know when I'm trying something new with my hair, something I don't feel particularly apt at doing, I wear it in places where my appearance isn't too important. Places like the beach or my yard. By the time I'm ready to wear it to work, I feel comfortable wearing it and doing it.

Last, there are just some styles you may never like on yourself, that's ok, too! That's why there are plenty of other options!

ljkforu
January 13th, 2009, 03:33 AM
I've always found a ponytail on a guy just fine! I mean, it's your hair and your comfort. I know it's hard because there is such a predjudice to men with long hair. Perhaps fiddle with a few styles that you are comfortable with?
I think a pony tail or single braid is always appropriate.

BlackfootHair
January 13th, 2009, 03:44 AM
I think there is nothing wrong with braids. Native Americans wore them all the time and the men were never less than masculine. :)

Comfrey
January 13th, 2009, 04:52 AM
hi Peter :)
Have you thought of a a hairglove? I'm in the UK but they can be found at hairglove (http://www.hairglove.com) orhairglove cycle (http://www.hairglovecycle.com/)

I think theyre dead sexy :D and they'll keep your hair tidy

Nini
January 13th, 2009, 05:42 AM
I love the look of a single braid on a man.

But you're not comfortable with that...

Maybe you could practise around the house? Try out different updo's when you're not going out, and give them each a little time before you decide wether they're going to work or not.

nini

Peter
January 13th, 2009, 06:52 AM
Wow, so many responses, thanks so much everyone. I really appreciate it and I feel a lot better about this. I'll try some of the suggestions out and hopefully I'll like something.

LHC is such a wonderful helpful place. :)

Thanks again,
Peter

sandigirl
January 13th, 2009, 10:02 AM
I love that you don't care what others think. I never did, either. The others have some good suggestions. There is nothing sexier than a guy with clean, fresh, long, loose, beautiful hair.

teela1978
January 13th, 2009, 10:10 AM
Did anyone else have to google tuque?

Girltron
January 13th, 2009, 10:53 AM
Is it the possibility of the updo looking less than masculine, or is it about the line it creates? Because your original post didn't sound like you had a problem with any particular style as being masculine/feminine. Just that you didn't care for the way some of the pulled-back styles look unless you wear the hat.

So what about some half-up options? If you're doing two things, one with your top hair and one with your bottom hair, you can give some shape to the upper area. I know what you mean about feeling a bit like you've got a smooth dome up top!

Two buns would be completely awesome, like one on top of the other and each with a metal or wooden hairstick. Or you can do a braid with the half-up part and use the rest of your hair as the other two strands of a big braid...

Even something as simple as pulling your top hair into a ponytail with a piece of rawhide and THEN doing a braid or bun or what have you with the whole lengths? You can alter the tension of the top hair in order to give more or less fulness.

Then there are the kind of braids that start one on each side of the ears and meet in the middle. Start with that, then do your bun underneath?

wintersun99
January 13th, 2009, 11:00 AM
http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/vbjournal.php?do=article&articleid=68

I saw this style in the Articles section the other day and really like it. I think you could pull of a "manly" version, especially with a buff - yes/no? :)

spidermom
January 13th, 2009, 11:01 AM
Nope, I'm quite comfortable wearing styles that I personally think are hideous - buns. With hair this long, I have to be practical.

wintersun99
January 13th, 2009, 11:02 AM
Did anyone else have to google tuque?

Yah - I did too - here's a wiki version, for those that didn't know either :)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tuque

david
January 13th, 2009, 01:13 PM
With practice you can make the hair on your head "fluff" a bit, it certainly doesn't have to be flat against your head. Mine only lays flat when my hair is oily. What you might try doing is making the bun/braid/whatever then using the handle of a comb, lift the hair on the top of your head to lessen the flatness.

Yeah if my hair is oiley it tends to lie flat against my head also. But to the original poster, if you find this happening all the time you should look into ways to boost the volume at the front.

Style wise I pretty much wear what I like. Im also very much against following the norms and just being myself.

It depends on the situation that im in. Once for a formal occasion, with full blown suit etc I wore my hair in a low bun that was just secured with hair pins. But for general everyday wear I usually wear various (ponytails (high, low etc) and plaits/braids (english braid and french). For example when im out running/trying to keep fit I usually put my hair in a french plait/braid to keep it out of my way. Half-ups are also good for everyday wear. I have also worn barrattes, alicebands and other such accessories with no problems, although I tend to wear "neutral" colours etc. I think the key to a guy pulling off such styles is to make sure the look is well co-ordinated with whatever your wearing and most importantly you have to be confident in how you look.

jivete
January 13th, 2009, 01:59 PM
I have a male friend that almost always wears his hair in two braids. They look great on him. In the summer, if you like something on your head, but the tuque is too hot (yes I had to look it up), why not wear a cotton bandana? It won't be too hot that way. My friend wears his like that a lot and it looks very pirate-y. I love it.

Schmoomunitions
January 13th, 2009, 02:08 PM
Saomeone else said this - Put the front and top in a seperate pony tail and put the rubberband about 1-2" away from your scalp, that way when you pull to tighten it, it will poof out the hair a little and add some height. Then braid or ponytail the rest.

Christina
January 13th, 2009, 02:12 PM
Looking at your avatar I can only imagine how lovely your hair would look braided. I love braids, whether it is one braid or two, and do not see braids as a "feminine" style at all.

I agree with Angelic! I think of braids and low ponytails as being pretty unisex. And long braids - especially with your dark hair - make me think of American Indians.

teela1978
January 13th, 2009, 02:22 PM
For a more on topic post... I find that if I part my hair before putting it in a ponytail/braid/bun that my hair doesn't look quite so squished as it otherwise does. Maybe that would help a bit?

LaurelSpring
January 13th, 2009, 02:27 PM
I just recently hurdled the woman over 40 wearing pig tails in public scene. Once I did it a couple of times I was over it.

Peter
January 13th, 2009, 03:51 PM
Thank you again everyone, I'll try experimenting with half-ups as well. To teela1978 - my hair is pretty much always parted since it just naturally lies that way.

Cheers,
Peter

rhubarbarin
January 13th, 2009, 05:33 PM
I personally think braids and buns look very manly. I'm used to seeing men with dark hair in 1 or two braids because I grew up near a Lakota (Native American) reservation.

I see long-haired men wear their hair all kinds of ways.. the one thing most seem to do is keep the style low on the back of the head, at the nape or just above.

Peter, if you're having trouble with sticks you might try a fork (I have no success with sticks so far, forks of all kinds work well for me).

Themyst
January 13th, 2009, 06:53 PM
I had always been involved with the biker scene (not bicycles!) in some way or another. A large percentage of the men have long hair and I don't know if I remember one of them wearing it down all the time - maybe just casually at their home. But most of the time they wear it in a low ponytail. I liked it.

Ara
January 13th, 2009, 08:06 PM
nope - just look twice at the spelling lol
up in Canada we spell it toque or touque usually lol