Are you unrealistic in your perception of yourself?

[neenerbabe]

I stumbled across this absolutely aggravating article and had to share it with all my fellow LHC'ers. Here is the link to read it in full--
http://www.divinecaroline.com/article/22323/58102-surprising-traits-reveal-personality?CMP=ILC-MstLkedWdgt

...the most annoying part is on page 2, where it talks about what people's hairstyles tell you about them. When it comes to long hair??

"Long Hair
Long hair can have multiple meanings. Many women believe that long hair makes them more sexually appealing, but it can also show a bohemian spirit or a need for freedom. Women over forty with long hair can be trying to hold onto their youth (and sex appeal) and may be unrealistic in their perceptions of themselves."

Unrealistic in their perceptions of themselves??? What is that supposed to mean anyways? We're not living in reality? Short hair is more lucid? :disgust:



:justy:

[Curlsgirl]

:taz::taz::taz:

[neenerbabe]

I second the Taz! lol. I felt like that when I read it too. :taz:

[Drynwhyl]

they don't know a thing ;)

[Chromis]

Having long hair shows that...I like having long hair. Nuttin unrealistic there!

[Akiko]

I really do not understand this mantra, "Women over 40 should not wear hair long." What's so magic about the number "40"? :confused:

[Snowymoon]

I don't have any plans of losing my sex appeal in my 40s...or my 50s, or 60s, or whatever. ;)

[backtolonghair]

Yes, what's wrong with keeping your sex appeal? I don't get it. Just cause women turn older doesn't mean they have to lose that. Long hair is feminine and beautiful.. that's all there is to it.
People try to overanalyze things sometimes...

[darkwaves]

I don't have any plans of losing my sex appeal in my 40s...or my 50s, or 60s, or whatever. ;)

Good point -- and neither do I...

[SHELIAANN1969]

Personally, I want to be a 70 year old, red headed sexpot telling my husband...."want some candy lil boy"? :eyebrows: with a wicked gleam in my eye! :cheese:

Some articles are just nuts!




Yes, what's wrong with keeping your sex appeal? I don't get it. Just cause women turn older doesn't mean they have to lose that. Long hair is feminine and beautiful.. that's all there is to it.
People try to overanalyze things sometimes...

[Islandgrrl]

Hmmm....I'm holding onto my youth....because I had short, horrible, fried hair in my 20s. I really wanna go there again. NOT!!! :rollin:

[Delila]

I'm with Chromis.

I wear my hair long because I like having long hair.

I keep letting it grow because I want to find out how long it will get, and I enjoy the process.

It's that simple.

If, in fact, you believe that I decorate your world, that's nice for you, but not my object in life.

[neenerbabe]

Personally, I want to be a 70 year old, red headed sexpot telling my husband...."want some candy lil boy"? :eyebrows: with a wicked gleam in my eye! :cheese:

Some articles are just nuts!


ROFLOL, that's awesome. Probably how I'll be when I'm older as well! It's true, you really are only as old as you feel. :D

[Sherri]

There are just :crazyq:

[Newniepg]

Personally, I want to be a 70 year old, red headed sexpot telling my husband...."want some candy lil boy"? :eyebrows: with a wicked gleam in my eye! :cheese:

Some articles are just nuts!


Right...I am SO glad I wasn't drinking anything when I read that! I couldn't help but laugh...and be ever so slightly disturbed. :ohmy:

I think that society will always be unaccepting of what is different and will try to rationalize that unacceptance by finding fault with those who do not follow convention.

[Unofficial_Rose]

It's extraordinary that self-appointed "experts" foist what are only opinions onto women with regard to their looks.

It's nobody's business a) how we have our hair and b) how we dress.

Nobody treats men like that, do they?

As an aside, just HOW patronising is the beauty industry, with it's skin and hair products seemingly aimed at morons. "Because I'm worth it" - ahem well I'm worth more than your £5.99 nasty product full of petrochemicals. Ooh, I'm ranting, must stop...But it is a load of boswellox. :draw::justy:

[taliarose]

They just can't accept that longhairs are on a journey which they choose to not go on. It's that simple in my mind. Now where's my 2x4 so I can beat some sense into them!

:cheese:

[JessTheMess]

Women over forty with long hair can be trying to hold onto their youth (and sex appeal) and may be unrealistic in their perceptions of themselves."



...oooooh.... so going to a salon to get your hair cut and styled every couple of weeks isn't holding onto youth or sex appeal either... hmmmm

[backtolonghair]

It's extraordinary that self-appointed "experts" foist what are only opinions onto women with regard to their looks.

It's nobody's business a) how we have our hair and b) how we dress.

Nobody treats men like that, do they?

As an aside, just HOW patronising is the beauty industry, with it's skin and hair products seemingly aimed at morons. "Because I'm worth it" - ahem well I'm worth more than your £5.99 nasty product full of petrochemicals. Ooh, I'm ranting, must stop...But it is a load of boswellox. :draw::justy:


LOL! that's so true! I"m just thankful that the going trend seems to be more natural these days. It definitely gives you more options for your skin and hair, then there use to be. I remember when I couldn't hardly find anyhting natural and now there's tons of natural and organic products out there. I love it! And alot of them are about the same price or cheaper than the junkier ones... you just have to know where to look.

Blessings

[burns_erin]

You notice they had nothing nice to say about any of the styles. Short hair means you are vain, going grey means you have your own opinions (not that that is in itself bad but some how the way it was written made it seem less nice to me though less harsh than the other opinions), and unique hair means you have little regard for what your authority figures think of you.

The person writing this article seems to have alot of negativity issues, any of the comments could be written with a more positive slant.

[arylkin]

It's extraordinary that self-appointed "experts" foist what are only opinions onto women with regard to their looks.

It's nobody's business a) how we have our hair and b) how we dress.

Nobody treats men like that, do they?

As an aside, just HOW patronising is the beauty industry, with it's skin and hair products seemingly aimed at morons. "Because I'm worth it" - ahem well I'm worth more than your £5.99 nasty product full of petrochemicals. Ooh, I'm ranting, must stop...But it is a load of boswellox. :draw::justy:

Exactly. :)

[Alana2000]

Keeping long hair after 40? Hmm I can think of a worse mid-life crisis to have.. notice how the article then says that a woman who let's her hair stay grey is comfortable with herself yadda yadda yadda... so I wonder what it means if your hair is long and grey??? Just wondering.... as I found three more grey ones last night.

[lora410]

Oh, so they bumped it from 30 to 40 huh :rollin: I love these hypocrites that write these papers:rolleyes:

[rhubarbarin]

Ugh, maddening.

So many things I read seem to be implying that 'older' (meaning, like, over 33) women shouldn't DARE to feel, act or look sexy, beautiful or desireable. Anyone who does is 'clinging to their youth with both wrinkled, claw-like hands'.

Vomit.

[neenerbabe]

...oooooh.... so going to a salon to get your hair cut and styled every couple of weeks isn't holding onto youth or sex appeal either... hmmmm

Very good point.

I do believe that spending wads of cash every few weeks to go to an overpriced salon would decidedly lower my appeal as far as hubby was concerned......:rolleyes:

He appreciates that I have long hair that looks nice and I don't spend as much as the average gal on it. :D

[joyfulmom4]

Sounds about as accurate as a horoscope to me.

[rapunzhell13]

I don't get this whole 'holding on to their youth' thing, I mean, what's even wrong with that? :confused: It seems to me that holding on to a youthful spirit is what keeps people invigorated throughout their lives regardless of age. It's all ridiculous. :rolleyes:

[aprilmay]

I don't care if others think my long hair is attractive. It makes me feel attractive and young and that is all I am interested in. Sometimes our favorite clothes, shoes, etc. are not what others like, but they can still love them!

[neon-dream]

...oooooh.... so going to a salon to get your hair cut and styled every couple of weeks isn't holding onto youth or sex appeal either... hmmmm

LMAO
true :P!

[Darkhorse1]

I turn 40 next year, and if someone tells me to cut my hair, I'm going to say to them 'why?'. "because you can't have long hair past 40". "Who says?". In the 1800s, women died with long, gray braids. I plan on being one of those women.

To me, long hair is a personal choice. Ageless and timeless. If I chose to have my hair to my knees or to my shoulders, that's MY choice. No one is taking that from me. Psychologists can complain and analyze all they want. I'd just say 'you're jealous because of envy'. I really do think it comes down to envy.

For me, I like long hair as long as it's nice/tidy. If it looks unruley or unhealthy, I will trim it. However, thanks to this BB, oiling my ends has saved me from uneccesary trims! :D

[heidi w.]

I am sexy, dammit. And youthful! Oh yeahhh!
So funny.

heidi w.
ETA: uh, yes, that would likely be unrealistic, but who IS entirely realistic about themselves? (being rhetorical) what a bunch of hogwash. why do people read this drivel? (I don't have to read this to know it's drivel. I call drivel drivel when I see it! drivel.) <chuckling>

[Raven69]

I stumbled across this absolutely aggravating article and had to share it with all my fellow LHC'ers. Here is the link to read it in full--
http://www.divinecaroline.com/article/22323/58102-surprising-traits-reveal-personality?CMP=ILC-MstLkedWdgt

...the most annoying part is on page 2, where it talks about what people's hairstyles tell you about them. When it comes to long hair??

"Long Hair
Long hair can have multiple meanings. Many women believe that long hair makes them more sexually appealing, but it can also show a bohemian spirit or a need for freedom. Women over forty with long hair can be trying to hold onto their youth (and sex appeal) and may be unrealistic in their perceptions of themselves."

Unrealistic in their perceptions of themselves??? What is that supposed to mean anyways? We're not living in reality? Short hair is more lucid? :disgust: :justy:

Hah, and I just love how they assume that women my age and I suppose up until the age of 40 want the long hair for only the 'sex appeal'!!! As freaking as if!!!! I haven't had...in a while! I never have, never will tried/try to 'use my hair' to get guys!!! Ugh! Yes guys in general do get all excited and whatnot when they see how long my hair is, but I certainly do not use it to get guys to hit on me! And not everyone is into the Bohemian 'spirit'! I may want to be 'free' of the military governing my life...but that's as 'free' as I want to be! I just love how everything is automatically stereotyped!

Not everything is revolved around sex! Gah, stupid people, talking about thing they know nothing about!

Now I know from experience, that women with BSL and shorter use their hair to - I don't know the term or word - so basically I'll say it this way: Women with BSL and shorter like to use their hair as weapons, by tossing or flipping their hair as if that is supposed to make them look hot or 'badd@..es'. They do it to me all the time, like its supposed to make me feel inferior or something...a girl did that to me once when I was at the mall, so I took down my hair and flipped it around, she looked shocked and walked off mad.

[wintersun99]

............

[Raven69]

The girl that wrote it has a mohawk so I am guessing she is hating on those that have long hair!

[Oberon88]

what drivel.

[heidi w.]

For those inclined to likewise "hate against" shorter hairs, or other styles, I recommend caution. It's no better to respond with this attitude than it is for anyone so inclined to respond to longer haired people with whatever attitude. It's the attitude, not the long or short of it. It's simply a shade of the same thing.

Just a point to consider.
heidi w.

[wintersun99]

I didn't bother to read the article, before I posted first - but now that I did, I think the "whole" article is crap. A neat, uncluttered desk means one is not dedicated to their job? Oh and a woman who likes beer is uncomfortable with her femininity? And my personal favorite, excessive post its means I'm overwhelmed... really? I call it organization :D

[florenonite]

For those inclined to likewise "hate against" shorter hairs, or other styles, I recommend caution. It's no better to respond with this attitude than it is for anyone so inclined to respond to longer haired people with whatever attitude. It's the attitude, not the long or short of it. It's simply a shade of the same thing.

Just a point to consider.
heidi w.

Good point, Heidi. Any article that condemns people's choices, to me, is a bad article. I was discussing feminism with a friend of mine and about how, yes, you get radical feminists who claim women are better than men, or that women must work in hardcore professional jobs, but a lot of them really just want women to be given a choice. The choice to be the CEO of a big company, or the choice to be a SAHM, or anything in between. Likewise, women should have the choice to have long hair, or short, natural or pink, healthy or fried to death, and who has the right to judge them?


I didn't bother to read the article, before I posted first - but now that I did, I think the "whole" article is crap. A neat, uncluttered desk means one is not dedicated to their job? Oh and a woman who likes beer is uncomfortable with her femininity? And my personal favorite, excessive post its means I'm overwhelmed... really? I call it organization :D

I concur. I have post-its for organisation, and I do like beer over girly drinks, but because of the taste. Yes, I'm not very feminine, but that's unrelated to what I drink, and I certainly wouldn't be insecure if I was more feminine.

[Alia]

Hanging on to my youth? :rant: Yeesh. Why is society so stuck on the idea of short, high upkeep styles for people older than 40? A lot of those people end up with scary Mrs. Brady hair these days. Plus, younger people are told that long hair ages them. Oh, and little girls have their hair cut, because they, 'can't take care of it.' Then, the twenty-something crowd is told they won't be taken seriously in their career without going for the chop. I won't even start on long hair for men of any age.:hmm:

[Kirin]

I really do not understand this mantra, "Women over 40 should not wear hair long." What's so magic about the number "40"? :confused:

I think this one goes on the pile of not wearing white shoes after labor day. You STILL hear that old walnut right, but how many run around in white sneakers every day of the year?

My friend's and I call these types of things "Someone's law". See everyone knows you aren't supposed to do x, y or z.... but they have NO clue who came up with this. We are likely going to form a posse one day and hunt down "someone" and give them a few swift kicks!

Also note "someone's law" states "women over 40".... does this mean men at 89 can grow their hair long and not be pining for youth? ROFL.

[Wind Dragon]

"Women over forty with long hair can be trying to hold onto their youth (and sex appeal) and may be unrealistic in their perceptions of themselves."

Unrealistic in their perceptions of themselves??? What is that supposed to mean anyways? We're not living in reality? Short hair is more lucid? :disgust:


The thing I find interesting about that is the apparent assumption that sex appeal goes hand-in-hand with youth, and is something that at some point we "lose" (otherwise, why try to "hold onto" it?) Typical, but it also helps explain the rest of it.

Bear in mind that the author is summarizing from someone else's book, but my guess on this one is that it refers to women who think something makes them look younger, prettier, etc. (or just never bothered to change their "look" along with their looks, maybe thinking their looks are still the same?) when in reality they look to most people like they're trying too hard. Personally, I've never gotten that sense from anyone from just their hair -- it's almost always included overdone makeup, dyed hair that doesn't go well with their skin color/makeup scheme, and clothes that probably would look have looked tacky on them twenty or thirty years ago, too, but which seem easier for younger folk to get away with.

It's been suggested that I'd personally look better with a bit of makeup (which I don't often wear) and with my eyebrows plucked (which I haven't done in nearly twenty years,) and I sometimes dress myself up in styles that are a bit off the beaten path. Could be that people think I think I look a lot better like that than I really do? I mean, how would I know? Whether I think I look better than I really do, I mean? ;)

'Course, the reality is that I just don't care, which means the article isn't addressed to me anyway. It asks "Do you know what you're revealing about yourself?" (emphasis mine.) I don't take it personally, because it doesn't feel personal. Her ending sentence might be a clue that the author isn't that serious about the whole thing, either:

But then again, I paint my nails black and have a mohawk, so maybe I’m just being a rebel.

I'm guessing, though, that she isn't over forty. :p

[wizzel]

hum sound fishy to me

[wizzel]

Yes, what's wrong with keeping your sex appeal? I don't get it. Just cause women turn older doesn't mean they have to lose that. Long hair is feminine and beautiful.. that's all there is to it.
People try to overanalyze things sometimes...
I agree, i also noticed that the auther used "can signify" alot so apparently one can't judge by hair alown.

[joyfulmom4]

As far as the age thing goes, I have loved long hair for as long as I can remember. I loved it when I was a little girl, a teen, in college and beyond. I still love it at age 40. I didn't grow it until my mid-20's. Then I cut in my 30's and re-grew again after a few years. It's the way I like my hair.

If I'm trying to hold onto anything, it's my hair I'm holding onto. I love long hair and don't want to cut it off just b/c of my age. Nothing to do with being afraid of letting go of my youth.

I like paisley too. I've loved paisley since forever. Wonder what that says about me?

[Tangles]

I am sexy, dammit. And youthful! Oh yeahhh!
So funny.

heidi w.
ETA: uh, yes, that would likely be unrealistic, but who IS entirely realistic about themselves? (being rhetorical) what a bunch of hogwash. why do people read this drivel? (I don't have to read this to know it's drivel. I call drivel drivel when I see it! drivel.) <chuckling>

This is true. Reality isn't absolute, and something as personal and harmless as hair can have many different realities to different people. This is the case with young people, too. I may objectively admire the perfectly coiffed bob of a girl I see walking down the street, but my reality is that long hair would look prettier on her.

I'd personally rather be happy and slightly deluded than immersed in other people's idea of reality or obligations. Hair is supposed to be FUN to work with. It would go the same way if people FORCED us to grow our hair long. Then we'd be screaming for those bobs, lol.

[Tangles]

I concur. I have post-its for organisation, and I do like beer over girly drinks, but because of the taste. Yes, I'm not very feminine, but that's unrelated to what I drink, and I certainly wouldn't be insecure if I was more feminine.

LOL I'm the same as you with alcohol--I like beer more than WINE. I don't consider myself any less feminine for it. (I don't like sports, at all, though).

[suicides_eve]

to each his own i guess, i personally think ladies older then me look better in longer hair. just my 2..

[florenonite]

I am sexy, dammit. And youthful! Oh yeahhh!
So funny.

heidi w.
ETA: uh, yes, that would likely be unrealistic, but who IS entirely realistic about themselves? (being rhetorical) what a bunch of hogwash. why do people read this drivel? (I don't have to read this to know it's drivel. I call drivel drivel when I see it! drivel.) <chuckling>

"I'm a realist, / I'm a romantic, / I'm an indecisive piece of sh*t. / I'm a realist, / I'm a romantic , / I am indecisive, and that'sabout it" (The Cribs, "I'm a Realist"). Why did I just quote that (besides the fact that I quote song lyrics far too often)? Because I think it fits, in a manner of speaking. The rest of the song has nothing to do with what I'm about to say, but those lines, isolated, sum it up. To be "realistic" about yourself generally entails being self-deprecating. If you're a "realist", then you think you are "an indecisive piece of sh*t". Society doesn't want us to like ourselves, because then we're vain or arrogant or some such thing. Hence, the article had nothing good to say about any hair, really, because otherwise we might think we have nice hair, and we wouldn't want that, would we? It would go against our being "realistic" and considering ourselves to be worthless pieces of crap, and that couldn't be good, could it?

[longhairedfairy]

That's so ridiculous it's almost laughable. There's absolutely nothing wrong with an "older" person being beautiful.

[Magicknthenight]

Bleh maybe they ran out of things to write about.:deal: Either way i would just stay away from things like that. Eventually most people will stop letting what someone else writes effect their life
and this line the author wrote "But then again, I paint my nails black and have a Mohawk, so maybe I’m just being a rebel."
i never got this. how does this make you a rebel?
Ehhh. I have painted my nails black before.:confused:
I wear black and people call me certain things. But really isn't black every color mixed?
So really I'm a walking rainbow XD
:justy: kinda drifted away from the topic there sorry :o
Reminds me of those make over shows. Always putting non-existent rules on everything. I don't know why people over a certain age can't do something. I want long hair because i love it. I'm sure I'll probably still have it when I'm 40. Doesn't mean I'm holding onto anything. but it is special to me. Then saying they are trying to hold onto something like youth or sex appeal they are kind of saying oh if you want this its wrong. 40 isn't really old.so what if you have sex appeal at that age?
:twocents:

[zen_oven]

Sound like, as my grandmother would undoubtedly say, a load of horsepuckey. :taz:

[Darkhorse1]

Terrible article. Number 1 in journalism-write an unbiased article. Get information from both sides. Allow the reader to come to their own solution on their own feelings--a good article gets facts from both sides to let the reader decide for themselves. Not being told.

Ish! I feel like writing to that magazine and say 'show me where it's written in stone that a 40 year old must have short hair'. That's just a stupid unwritten rule made by hair dressers to charge you more money for a hair cut every six weeks.

[savi]

Load of bull, even on some other parts.
I use post it notes, because my brain leaks for one thing.

[HairColoredHair]

Yeah, no...


My hair is long because I LIKE IT.


The end! :D

[longhairedfairy]

I wear black and people call me certain things. But really isn't black every color mixed?
So really I'm a walking rainbow XD

In terms of light at least, white is every color mixed. Black is supposedly the absence of all color, although it has been suggested that it could be another spectrum of colors entirely. Interesting thought.

[MissHair]

What a dumb article. I really have nothing to add. It's just dumb.

[DotDotDot]

Wow, that whole article is just ridiculous. As a young teen, I am definitely NOT interested in my hair giving me sex appeal. :rolleyes: Also, if you read the introductory paragraph - ice cream is my favorite food. I hate sports. I only watch about a half an hour of TV a day. Where do they get these ideas?

[tabbymook]

I'm forty next june, and hope my hair is a little longer and wiser by then. Forty is a wonderful age. I think most women look better at that age, if they haven't lost their HEALTH. When these ridiculous people say 'clinging to youth' I think they ought to remember that many of the signs of aging are the outward signs of neglect and self-abuse.

Long hair and a merry face, a strong body, mindfulness, knowing who you are, confidence, learning how to not give in to the wishes of manipulators, time-wasters and soul-suckers-- whether they are advertisers or more immediate foes. Patience and tolerance. I've been working hard at these things, and even sensing that I'm getting closer gives me greater peace and happiness-- and I'm only starting to get closer, because I've given up some of the main anxieties and insecurities I obsessed about when I was younger. For me, only time could do that.

But trying to explain these things to someone who is so involved with mainstream madness that they are contributing articles is like waving to someone from a far-off island. I gave up TV and magazines a few years ago, and I'm better off for it-- pick and choose good indy sites for news. No ads, noone except my mother telling me what to do!

[Accolady]

Though I didn't, and do not plan to read the article, the highlights
are all that are needed to determine it's validity. It is an opinion.
And you know what they say about those. ;)

The 'over forty' rule has about as much weight with me as the 'white
after Labor day' bit. These silly rules are a way to ensure women keep
spending money. Can't wear white? Egads, we'll need to spend more money,
buy something new. Can't have long hair? Must spend money at a hair
salon. Must color, must trim, must style, must have a manicure. Please.

IF I feel good, I'll do all of the above, but not for a rule someone else
came up with to judge my appearance. Admittedly, part of the reason I cut
my hair was going back to work. I fell into the soup, I felt as if I should look
the part of the professional woman. Only after my hair was cut did I fully
understand that my long hair was not a hairstyle, it was a lifestyle.

Even though I wear my hair up in a bun a vast majority of the time, and
rarely wear it down even around my family, it was who I am. It is part of
me. It comes down when I go to bed, and it's there when I get up. If I
feel like taking pictures, it makes me feel good. This is hardly clinging to anything,
especially if no one knows I even have long hair. It's like a tattoo that no
one sees. I know it's there and I like it.

Less money at the salon, more money for cheese! :cheese:

[rockkcor]

I am 40 and it doesn't seam I am loosing my hair yet...
So it may grow some more and perhaps reach unrealistic length...
If it does that - then it would be very realistic... :D
Unrealistic?

[Tressie]

As someone else has already said: "mindless drivel"! I'm thankful I have finally reached an age where I can make up my OWN mind. Do we need some columnist's affirmation before we feel comfortable with our hair choices? Obviously not! HA!

[DragonLady]

I'm forty next june, and hope my hair is a little longer and wiser by then. Forty is a wonderful age. I think most women look better at that age, if they haven't lost their HEALTH. When these ridiculous people say 'clinging to youth' I think they ought to remember that many of the signs of aging are the outward signs of neglect and self-abuse.

Long hair and a merry face, a strong body, mindfulness, knowing who you are, confidence, learning how to not give in to the wishes of manipulators, time-wasters and soul-suckers-- whether they are advertisers or more immediate foes. Patience and tolerance. I've been working hard at these things, and even sensing that I'm getting closer gives me greater peace and happiness-- and I'm only starting to get closer, because I've given up some of the main anxieties and insecurities I obsessed about when I was younger. For me, only time could do that.

But trying to explain these things to someone who is so involved with mainstream madness that they are contributing articles is like waving to someone from a far-off island. I gave up TV and magazines a few years ago, and I'm better off for it-- pick and choose good indy sites for news. No ads, noone except my mother telling me what to do!

:cheese: Great post! As someone who was raised outside of the "mainstream" and taught to question everything, I know exactly where you're coming from. I also quit watching tv and quit buying fashion magazines and such many years ago. I'm much better off for it. Sometimes now I see tv at a friend's house, and can't believe some of the things actors and actresses (or news anchors) do to themselves in the name of their careers. I find it sad to the point of heartbreaking to see an older actress wearing so much makeup her whole face looks like it might fall off or a young girl being made up to look like a cheap prostitute and then told she's "beautiful". :(

I agree completely that good health, an ear-to-ear smile and the ability to care for oneself under any circumstance is the key to living well, retaining an eternal youthfulness, and dying happily knowing that you have squeezed your life for all the best it had to offer.

[tabbymook]

:cheese: Great post! As someone who was raised outside of the "mainstream" and taught to question everything, I know exactly where you're coming from. I also quit watching tv and quit buying fashion magazines and such many years ago. I'm much better off for it. Sometimes now I see tv at a friend's house, and can't believe some of the things actors and actresses (or news anchors) do to themselves in the name of their careers. I find it sad to the point of heartbreaking to see an older actress wearing so much makeup her whole face looks like it might fall off or a young girl being made up to look like a cheap prostitute and then told she's "beautiful". :(

I agree completely that good health, an ear-to-ear smile and the ability to care for oneself under any circumstance is the key to living well, retaining an eternal youthfulness, and dying happily knowing that you have squeezed your life for all the best it had to offer.

"I find it sad to the point of heartbreaking"

Thanks dragonlady-- I snuck (sneaked? snook?) back in to this thread because I thought OMG I must sound so sanctimonious- only to find your post. And yes, heartbreaking. I'm a big crier and I have to say that watching TV was a bad trigger. Now when I'm near one it all sounds so aggressive. Actually hard to understand what's going on!

I wanted to edit my post and say that simply because I had problems as a younger woman doesn't mean that all younger women are or were like me! I have known and see here plenty of examples of vibrant younger women in full command of themselves! But I was suggestible and insecure. A cult leader's dream. That's one of the reasons why I'm better off now I'm older!

[DragonLady]

Now when I'm near one it all sounds so aggressive.

Yes. I'm appalled by all the guns and violence. I detest hearing someone say "Oh, he killed her because she _______ (fill in the blank with some completely unacceptable excuse)." And they say it as if they understand the character's motivation perfectly and feel that if they were in the same situation they would do the same thing. It just makes me cringe. I can't believe the popular media is able to manipulate people's perceptions to the extent it does. :(



But I was suggestible and insecure


Yes; me too. I spent many, many years denying who I really am, and what I really wanted, and swallowing the things I felt and thought because I was so insecure.

Now, I stand up straight, look people right in the eye, and tell 'em what I think and what I need and where I'm coming from. It puts some of them off, yes, but I've come to realize that is THEIR problem, not mine.

I had a rough, rough, rough childhood and that has made me strong. But realizing (finally) that if I could live with it everyone else damn sure could too, has made me a hundred times stronger.

I am, and I am fine. And I can't tell you how many years of pain and horror I went through to reach the day I could say those simple words.

[PhillyGirl1978@]

I know, that's pretty stupid. Hell it's probably gonna take 3-4 more years to get it exactly the length I want and I'm 30 now....somehow I doubt that 6 years of true long hair is gonna be enough for me. And I think women over 40 with long hair don't look like they are trying to hold on to thier youth, even though I do think it makes them still look young or at least young at heart, firey, sexy. All the things I plan to be at 40.

[Sunshine69]

This article sounds like the kind of BS you read in women's magazines that are designed to make us feel terrible about ourselves so we buy all the crap that their advertisers are trying to sell.

Wear your hair the way you like it. What does age have to do with it? Nobody can tell you how you feel about yourself, but you.