What "undesirable" characteristics of your hair do you love (or are you learning to?)

[alewyn]

I was thinking about how boring it would be if absolutely everyone had the hair that is seen as being the most desirable, and wondering why I still wish for it sometimes regardless... I find myself able to appreciate the beauty of other people's hair, even when it's not "perfect" according to an arbitrary social standard, but not my own. So I thought it might be nice to create a place for those looking to embrace something about their hair that is typically (in your culture) considered undesirable, whether that be a color, texture, thickness, current length, etc. etc.

For me, I'm working hard to embrace that my hair isn't thick, and never will be. It's not quite thin (my ponytail circumference is 3", so it's exactly in the middle) but I have quite a lot of taper and my buns sometimes turn out looking teeny tiny to me. I don't know if I've made it to love quite yet, but I am trying to enjoy some of the perks of not having super thick hair--like how lightweight it is, how easy it is to put it all up, how rare hair-induced headaches are, and how quickly it air dries.

I've also made more progress toward accepting my frizz lately (shoutout to Abacus's frizz appreciation thread!) :) I've come to see it as just another layer of my wavy texture, rather than an obstacle to the perfectly defined waves I used to be obsessed with obtaining. I also have tons of baby hairs that like to pop out of updos, which I think gives those styles a little bit more playfulness and helps soften the appearance of my hairline, which is nice now that my face-framing layers are grown out enough to stay in my buns.

How about you all?

[ArienEllariel]

It's fine silky texture mixed with the more crinkly at times medium strands. That my wave pattern is shorter/ closer together than some.

[neko_kawaii]

My hair isn’t curly but then it doesn’t take the same amount of effort curls do.

[cinamio]

It’s frizzy, but that makes my lowish density hair look thicker.

[Gwendolynn]

My hair has always been very fine and limp, not holding any curl or wave at all and wanting to only hang straight down along my face.

I am starting to get really appreciative of the fact that my hair never looks messy, that wearing it up in a certain way does not leave crinkles in my hair when I take it down, and that it is just so very easy to take care of.

[Joules]

My hair is fluffy and frizzy. It looks dry even when it is the softest and smoothest to the touch as it can be. I used to dream of those shiny Pantene commercial worthy hair, but alas, my genetics say no. I love it anyway.

It also has shorter terminal length than I'd like it to. Like, it starts to taper when it grows past waist. I dreamed of Classic length with thick ends, but instead I'll get Classic length with like ten hairs at the ends. Oh well. I still love it, it's mine and I'm grateful to have it. It gets enough hate from those who believe in conventional beauty standards, there's no point in me hating it too.

[Bri-Chan]

I would like to have more strands (I have 7 cm/2,76 inches ponytail) but, when it comes to thickness of each strand, I like it for being fine. I's soft effortless. And it reminds me of elves, I don't know why.
Oh,and because it has frizzy and impossible to define waves, I have the sensation it looks way thicker than it actually is.

[Cg]

I love my silvers, although Madison Avenue insists I should be depressed, horrified, ashamed, sprinting for dye, etc. I quite like the look of hair transitioning to white.

Also my strands are ultrafine and flyaway, with no body whatsoever. It never looks unkempt, and even though too sparse (again, Madison Avenue's irrelevant opinion), when down to dry it's Pantene hair.

[Kerrtu-Kevät]

My natural hair color. It's that commonly hated dark blonde-light brown color(going more medium blonde on the ends) and I genuinely love it now. I hate how as a kid adults in my life made it a point to try make me insecure about my hair turning darker instead of saying that it's beautiful in its own right because it is!

I have also come to accept that my hair isn't completely straight or wavy, no matter how I treat it its a mix of 1b-2a/b and I embrace it. Sometimes it's frizzy straight hair and that's okay it doesn't need to be fixed!

[memeow]

I feel like I've got the trifecta: thin (2.5" circumference), in that awkward wavy but won't stay coherent 2a-ish range, and the much-maligned blonette color. To top it all off it is very fine and easily damaged, with white dots galore in spite of pretty careful handling. I have good days and bad days as far as loving it goes. High humidity + artificial lighting are not my friends. But I love the natural color variation and different high/low lights that come out in different lighting, the easy bun waves, how quickly it dries, and that it's rarely too heavy. I've also found that better care makes a huge difference. Working out the right leave-in balance means it rarely tangles and I can stretch washes to 3 days without getting too greasy, and protective updos have let me gain length consistently even though the ends are quite fragile. And in spite of being told the entire time I was growing up that I couldn't have long hair since it's too thin and fine....I love it long! It's totally the best of both worlds because I can fold it up in a messy bun whenever I'm not in the mood, but when I want to feel like a princess it's all just right here!

[Abacus]

Big red hair that's easily frizzy (a lot of people in my life have called me Sideshow Bob, and that truly hurt my heart for a long time, so much so that it's hard to even write it here!), and a high and uneven hairline. The hairline has been the hardest to love, but it helps to have some big-forehead idols to look up to.

I now love my hair with a passion, especially thanks to the natural hair movement and seeing so many stunning Black women embrace their natural textures, but it wasn't always easy.

[Trip]

Trying to shift my view of my ends from "thin n scraggly" to "wispy" and "fairytail" like some people call them here

[7up]

Learning to love… the unpredictability. Use to hate frizz and brazziness which are two things I can embrace with ease these days. I don’t hold my hair to such harsh standards because some days it looks beautiful and others like a bird nest but it’s just things outside my control and it’s okay! Like weather and environment and just even now I sleep or dry my hair impact it to behave so differently from wash to wash. The braziness has more to do with the growing out of bleached hair, but I come to like it in the sun light and it sort of blends nicely at times so I don’t mind. These things would drive me nuts before so it’s funny how things change.

[0xalis]

It's shortness :p
I feared I would be filled with regret and despair over buzzing it again but it's been quite the opposite.

It's also relatively thin but considering how much my partner's thickness causes her inconvenience I have found myself to be very grateful for it!!

[KokoroDragon]

I love my natural hair color. It's in that blonde-brown area (I was bright blonde as a kid, but it's darkened with age) with aggressive red undertones. Not quite strawberry blonde, but in the sun it looks like it.

Something I'm learning to love is my texture. I've always thought I had straight hair, but hair typing has shown that it's on the cusp between straight and wavy. I treat it like straight hair - not enough wave to bother with - but it will always frizz and tangle more than someone with 1a-1b hair.

[Brandt]

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[Brandt]

I love my natural hair color. It's in that blonde-brown area (I was bright blonde as a kid, but it's darkened with age) with aggressive red undertones. Not quite strawberry blonde, but in the sun it looks like it.

Something I'm learning to love is my texture. I've always thought I had straight hair, but hair typing has shown that it's on the cusp between straight and wavy. I treat it like straight hair - not enough wave to bother with - but it will always frizz and tangle more than someone with 1a-1b hair.

One thing for those of us with blonde, brown and red elements (naturally) in our hair--there's no good name for that hair color. I do think in the right light, a lot of people who are in that transition area between blonde and brown will look a little red (at least from my experience--I think this was even more the case back when there were more incandescent lights too). And, yeah--I find especially if the sun is at a lower angle in the sky (especially winter, and especially in lower humidity environments, due to more of the red from the solar spectrum making it to the earth's surface, versus blue) my hair will have more of the strawberry blonde look (my avatar is from January, albeit in bright sunshine) than if the sun is higher.

[Bat]

my hairs considered coarse, but the upside to that is that coarse hair is generally strong so should in theory be able to grow long even with mechanical damage

[Hedwig]

It's fine silky texture mixed with the more crinkly at times medium strands. That my wave pattern is shorter/ closer together than some.

Exactly the same here! Most of my hair is fine and silky but then I have these patches of really coarse and crinkly hairs. It messes up my texture a bit but I‘m trying to be appreciative of all of the hair that I have on my head. :)

[Mariekeeee14]

I don't style my hair curly, even though I consider it 2c/3a. I brush it and braid it and leave it be. I don't mind the frizziness, anymore. It comes with the territory of wielding a brush. I'm fine with it. The problem with styling it curly is that my head HATES tangles. I am in physical pain when I have them. I'm so much more comfortable without curls. They're pretty. For special occasions, fine! Not for my day to day.

[thatsthat]

i try to keep my ends healthy and haven't bleached in a year but i kinda love the texture and look of slightly fried/damaged hair :) also grown out roots

[PeonyBlue]

I’ve always loved my frizz…it’s my halo. I live in a humid climate, and with a little bit of encouragement, my whispies curl and ringlet like I tried to make them do something.

In the end,I’ve never wanted my hair to be perfect - it’s erratic and idiosyncratic and just…me!

[MidnightMoon]

my waves and curls... they do add volume and look good *sometimes*

[Glitch]

My shrinkage! I usually wear my hair straight (heatless methods only, though) and as it transformed into healthy hair, whenever I'd wear it wavy I finally started experiencing the "shrinkage" I'd always see people complaining about. While it definitely can feel discouraging because it hides your hair's true length, it really adds a bunch of volume to my waves and it looks very thick and beautiful! Like many others, I've also heavily struggled with liking my waves, I mean I even joined here because of wanting to like it! Well, the longer my hair gets, the more intense the shrinkage can be and the more luscious the waves are. :o

[illicitlizard]

How tangly it is, mine is not hair you can run your fingers through (even immediately after brushing). I remind myself it's just a symptom of fine hair which I love thanks to its soft texture :)

[zhivago]

it isnt thick
but i've never had a hair-induced headache

[bparnell75]

The color: I kept it bleached blond for 30 years because it reminded me of the color of a mouse.
It is gradually getting more silver and I often get compliments on the color so it is growing on me.
My hair has always been like my dad's and his did not get all silver until his 80's so I am there now
as well as inheriting his thin/baldness. My hair is so thin on top I have a hard time keeping my toys in place
without bobby pins.

[wishy]

I used to despair a lot about my hair's fineness & thinness (less than 2" circumference). But after my friend grew out his insanely thick hair I realized that it's kind of nice to have completely weightless buns and hair that doesn't make me hot in the summer.

[Goatcraft]

Curls and color. As someone else mentioned, shrinkage is a nightmare. As for color.. I've always found black to be a bit boring. I wish I had that gorgeous henna red that everyone has on here Lol. But alas! It's color or length. I chose length. I also started henna/indigo to intensify the color and I'm a lot happier now.

[Lady Stardust]

Curls and color. As someone else mentioned, shrinkage is a nightmare. As for color.. I've always found black to be a bit boring. I wish I had that gorgeous henna red that everyone has on here Lol. But alas! It's color or length. I chose length. I also started henna/indigo to intensify the color and I'm a lot happier now.

I think henna on black hair is gorgeous, because it can shine red in the sun. If there are any silvers coloured red with henna, they glint like the finest highlights/lowlights and look stunning.

I think henna can be easier to see on someone else’s head :) Observers get to see the shine in the sunshine, that you can’t always see on your own head!

[lilbee]

I’ve always loved my frizz…it’s my halo. I live in a humid climate, and with a little bit of encouragement, my whispies curl and ringlet like I tried to make them do something.

In the end,I’ve never wanted my hair to be perfect - it’s erratic and idiosyncratic and just…me!

Same !! Frizz is so romantic, cute and lovely. I have never understood the urge for flat "nylon sleek" hair. I particularly love the halo stuff, making little curly clouds around my face and in my nape when I have my hair up. ��

[ExpectoPatronum]

For me it's my hair color. It's not a particularly desirable shade of brown - kinda neutral in tone, not really light and not dark either.

I'm learning to appreciate the red and gold tones my hair gets when the sun lightens it.