Decided to do a big chop, am I ever going to get to my goal?

[MeganAimee]

Hey guys, my hair was just 23.5 inches, I was finally happy with the length again. I realized I had too many layers to be happy with it for a long time, and too much damage on the tips from old bleach, so I decided to do a big chop. I am currently at 17 inches, just bellow collarbone. I'm feeling like I am NEVER going to get to my goals, first one being waist. I keep getting close, then the urge to do something to it hits, and without thinking it through ill do it, whether its bleach, or layers. Does anyone else have this issue? If so, how did you overcome the urges?:confused::confused::confused: I need to know!!!

p.s would love to see your hair too!

Here are some pictures of my hair now:
https://imgur.com/kdD0I3V
(https://imgur.com/tqf4app)https://imgur.com/tqf4app
https://imgur.com/ARxVs3k

[dagny]

Your hair looks great -- so be at peace that you actually HAVE reached two of your goals: to remove the damage and layers. << hugs >>

As for those 'urges' to do something to your hair that later you regret or that hinders your length goal --- yea, I get those too! There is a "2 week" thread in which you can post on whenever one of those "urges" hits. The point of the thread is to give yourself 2 weeks to think about what you are wanting to do with your hair, without actually going out and doing it --- kind of like a cooling off period.

I find it helpful to have a lot of photos of my hair "goals" around to help thwart those urges. Pinterest is good, or just downloading photos of hair you like (and are trying to copy). Also, checking in on the boards frequently can also be helpful.

Best of luck to you, and happy growing! :-)

[Sparkles122]

I’m not going to lie I have urges all the time. I used to do it without thinking about it, but now I wait it out and don’t do anything until im absolutely sure. I dont blame you for wanting to get rid of the damage though. I too have old damage and sometimes it does get stressful for me caring for it.

[Laurab]

I think that getting impulsive isn't always a bad thing!
Realistically, your goal ISN'T to have waist length hair with weird layers and damage. Some people like to hold onto any length they can, others prefer to chop it off.
People can reach their goal with both methods, it just takes time.

[squirrrel]

Hey... so many of us want to grow out long, but have old damage to deal with. Some grow to a certain milestone, such as waist, and then cut back, others get rid of the damage in chunks as they are growing out, or tiny little bits along the way. Each of us need to make up our own minds what is best for us... after all, we need to find the balance between long hair and healthy hair.

Useful threads... already mentioned is the two week rule thread. Another good one to check out is microtrimmers and maintainers. If you haven’t checked these out yet, I would look at some of the more nourishing wash routines, whether CWC, Roo, LOC, SMT, or who knows what, just to help with keeping whatever you still might have of that old damage in as nice a condition as possible.

[Amenahh]

I feel you, I think I would have done the same. I also have weird layers and I'm trying to be patient, but I would have cut them too if I also had damage.
Think that now you can start fresh with healthy hair, and you'll enjoy the hair growth journey more than trying to hold on to the length while dealing with the damage and the layers.

[DropStitches]

For what it's worth, your hair looks lovely and healthy now, and I think you will be in a better position to grow. I think in this case, you made the right decision, and I wouldn't beat yourself up over it too much.

That said, I do absolutely empathise with wanting to stop impulsive chopping. I used to think, 'My hair grows super fast! I can cut it off today, and it will be back tomorrow!' - and while I *don't* regret the fun times I had with rainbow hair, and a variety of short styles, I do sometimes feel sad about how long it will take me to grow really long hair.

I second the suggestion of posting in the two week rule thread when you get the urge to do something impulsive. Also, perhaps, if you haven't already done this, you could measure to see where your milestones are, so you could do a rough guesstimate of how long it might take you to get there? I had never done that before becoming more active on here, and now the fact that I know, for example, that it's going to take me (and my currently super short hair) probably till the end of 2021 to get to APL, the end of 2022 to get to BSL, that I won't hit waist till well into 2023, etc - it definitely makes me think twice about chopping! Growing hair is one of the few things in life that there isn't really a short cut to.

You will get there, MeganAimee, and I look forward to seeing your progress!

[lapushka]

Have you considered that this might have been an urge as well? Because it was on impulse. No 2 weeks thinking about it (posting in that thread for instance). And... well... ;) :p

But at least now the bleach damage is gone, so that is a good thing! I think it looks great. In the sense that you don't have to mess with it anymore from now on, for sure. Just let it grow.

And next time you want to change up *anything* about it, let us know, and give it some thought! :flower:

Happy growing. :D

[Simpscone]

As everyone else has mentioned, the urges don't necessarily go away, unfortunately. I've given in to urges a few times since growing out from chin length, but what I do now is throw my hair up for a few days/weeks and distract myself with something else so I'm not thinking about it, and then I tend to be either glad I didn't do it or I go ahead and do it! I've nearly bleached my hair all over a few times, but I keep reminding myself of my goal.

My hair was super bleach damaged in 2016 and just wouldn't grow/kept snapping off. November of 2016 I chopped it off to chin length (the front pieces were even shorter than that from breakage!) Now it's 3 and a half years later and my hair is at BSL and healthier than it's been in years. It felt like it would never get to this point, but all it takes is time. I kept my hair bleach blonde for the first year of growing out, and then decided to grow out the bleach. I had been saying for years that I wanted it super long, but wasn't willing to give up my crazy colours and use of heat. I decided that having it long for once in my life was more important than any colour. So now, any time I get an urge I look up pictures of people with my hair type but my goal length and keep reminding myself that I'm well on my way there!

I still sometimes do little things on impulse (for example I currently have my front pieces white because I figured it was low-risk) but I make sure if it's anything that will effect the growth journey, I wait at least 2 weeks and make a list of pros and cons to doing it.

[Ylva]

I fully agree with those who say you're in a good place to grow right now. You made some "improvements" to your hair and achieved the goal of getting rid of layers as well as damage. Now, it's just onwards and downwards from here.


Growing hair is one of the few things in life that there isn't really a short cut to.

:eyebrows:

[DropStitches]

:eyebrows:

:blushing: I can't resist a bit of wordplay... I wondered if anyone would notice!

[jane_marie]

It's going to be okay. You'll get there. This is a journey and it's okay to make stops along the way as long as those stops contribute to your overall goal.

I made a similar choice a couple of weeks ago. For months I was bothered by my damage and was slowly starting to hate my feathered V cut the longer my hair got. It just... didn't suit me. I regularly made posts in the 2 week rule thread but ultimately all they did was prolong my unhappiness. So, one day I just chopped from the waist/hip border all the up to BSL.

Now my hair is happier and healthier which means that I can grow it faster without having to worry about all that damage as much. I no longer need to dose my hair in olaplex once a month!

Just keep your ultimate goal in mind and really take time to weigh out the cost if you have an urge to do something that contradicts them. I assume that your ultimate goal isn't just about length but also about overall health.

Try, if you can to enjoy were you are today. Tomorrow will come. It's going to be alright. :flower:

[Jools69]

You will get there. It took me 4 years to get rid of hair that was damaged from a badly done spiral perm. I persevered and now 5 years on, I’m 3 inches from my waist at MBL.

I remember when I was much younger that I would try to grow my hair long, get to shoulder/APL, get bored and cut it. Perhaps it was my age, perhaps peer pressure, or perhaps it was my impulsiveness. Now, all of those aren’t important to me.

You will get there. Just persevere, apply the ‘2 week rule’ and enjoy your hair as you grow it!

[MeganAimee]

Thank you everyone! I appreciate the positivity! I am actually feeling really good about my hair now, which is great. <3 I'm really excited about the journey now.