When do you decide it's too long for you?

[esfand]

I've wanted long hair since I was 17, and was able to finally get to my dream length of full virgin hair 8 years later. Now, my hair is classic length and as much as I love it, it's beginning to feel like it's too much to handle. It goes past my fingertips so when I brush my hair, it's a bit more effort. It's also getting to a point where it's starting to hurt my neck from the weight no matter how I style it, which I never imagined would be a problem for me - this is the main reason I wrote this post. I am thinking of trimming back to bra strap, which is a bit shorter than waist length - which was I think the perfect length for me.

When do you decide if a length is too long for you?

[Ylva]

I think the way you're feeling about your hair sounds reasonable. If it becomes too much of a bother, or you're no longer enjoying it as much as you "should", it's probably inconveniently long - for you.

I have not found a "too long" point yet, but I think that growing past fingertip length with my current ends (bleached at least three times + some other chemical treatments) would be too long until I get rid of some of the damage. Then there will be a new too long.

[Milynn]

For me, too long is anything past hip length if I have brushed it forward - anything past tailbone if I just let it hang back. This with mild waves.

There are several reasons, but few major ones are that at than point it begins to get stuck with door handles and I would really not like of a thought accidentally sitting on it. Also, aesthetically wise I personally think that hair can be indeed too long also - I find that it most often seems to compliment the body silhouette and overall picture if it reaches hip/tbl but goes no longer than that. Easier to keep ends in check as well.

[spidermom]

I had a dream of classic length, but at that length it seemed to be more trouble than it was worth - hot, heavy, lots of split ends, tangled easily. It looked great in pictures, though! I cut back in increments, eventually settling at collarbone length for 2 years because I loved it; it was so easy. Now I'm growing again, almost waist length now.

[MusicalSpoons]

First off, it's an absolutely individual thing and as Ylva said, your feelings sound entirely reasonable and the whole point of long hair is to enjoy it!

For me, I'm not there yet. I did think about this when I was having to sit down to detangle it most days and it was starting to brush the floor if I sat on a stool instead of my bed, and the fact it was pooling in the plughole when I shower because I have to sit for that too. Right now I mostly sit on my bed to detangle or sometimes stand, and the plughole is clean when I shower so I'm not worrying yet. I think my hemline is what will decide it for me, because there will come a point when I feel the ends are too thin for my liking. Depending on when that happens I might grow on just to see how far I can get, then after that cut back to where I was last okay with my hemline.

That said, if wearing it down were a reason for me for having long hair, I'd be well past 'too long'! Even before LHC when I was going between hip and tailbone I used to wear it up the vast majority of the time for practicality, though it was okay for wearing down occasionally.

[lilbee]

I think the way you're feeling about your hair sounds reasonable. If it becomes too much of a bother, or you're no longer enjoying it as much as you "should", it's probably inconveniently long - for you.
(...)

Totally seconding that ! When the negative feelings outweight the positive ones, it's time to reset our priorities and find new goals to enjoy ! :)

[lapushka]

If it's past fingertips, that's longer than classic length? :hmm:

Maybe trim one or a couple inches, see how you feel?

This is not about cutting on impulse and generally doesn't require (IMMHO) the 2 week rule. This is about comfort and what you can handle.

For me that cut-off point is classic. I went to FTL once as well, which is the furthest I got in my journey and no. I had the full intention of trying to go to knee-length, but at FTL I just realized that even that length was too tough to wash, style (scrunching was generally not a thing anymore) and generally keep neat.

[Bri-Chan]

Since I like to wear my hair down, to me too long hair is when it becomes uncomfortable. I really like classic length, but several friends of mine (who also wear hair down) at that point cut back to BCL or TBL because of how uncomfortable it was in everyday life.
Since BCL is just 3 inches far from where I am now, I don't think that length could do a significant difference. So in my mind it's somewhere after TBL.

[AmaryllisRed]

I haven't gotten there yet. There have been times when I had to find new ways to deal with it, but no significant pain or exertion. If that happens, I'd have to cut back.
If I were you, I think I'd cut back to hip or thereabouts first rather than going all the way up to BSL. Just to see if I was happier at hip. Fingertip to BSL is a loooot of length.

[lapushka]

I haven't gotten there yet. There have been times when I had to find new ways to deal with it, but no significant pain or exertion. If that happens, I'd have to cut back.
If I were you, I think I'd cut back to hip or thereabouts first rather than going all the way up to BSL. Just to see if I was happier at hip. Fingertip to BSL is a loooot of length.

Oh yes, go in small steps!!!

Never cut a huge piece off. I went from classic to hip once and regretted it instantly.

[esfand]

Your responses are all so interesting, thank you.


I had a dream of classic length, but at that length it seemed to be more trouble than it was worth - hot, heavy, lots of split ends, tangled easily. It looked great in pictures, though! I cut back in increments, eventually settling at collarbone length for 2 years because I loved it; it was so easy. Now I'm growing again, almost waist length now.

Oh, I feel it. It's hot, heavy, it's starting to tangle more than I'd like (and my hair barely tangles), there's TUMBLEWEEDS of hair collecting every couple days, and I even sit on it without meaning to. It's so fun when I am just swishing my hair around and in photos but yeah, it does get in the way. I think waist it a good length for a lot of people, it's long but short enough that you don't have to pay as much mind to it.


First off, it's an absolutely individual thing and as Ylva said, your feelings sound entirely reasonable and the whole point of long hair is to enjoy it!

For me, I'm not there yet. I did think about this when I was having to sit down to detangle it most days and it was starting to brush the floor if I sat on a stool instead of my bed, and the fact it was pooling in the plughole when I shower because I have to sit for that too. Right now I mostly sit on my bed to detangle or sometimes stand, and the plughole is clean when I shower so I'm not worrying yet. I think my hemline is what will decide it for me, because there will come a point when I feel the ends are too thin for my liking. Depending on when that happens I might grow on just to see how far I can get, then after that cut back to where I was last okay with my hemline.

That said, if wearing it down were a reason for me for having long hair, I'd be well past 'too long'! Even before LHC when I was going between hip and tailbone I used to wear it up the vast majority of the time for practicality, though it was okay for wearing down occasionally.

Oh geez, my hair hits the floor when I bend down to pick something up or clean. I put it up in a bun, but buns are starting to be heavy.


I haven't gotten there yet. There have been times when I had to find new ways to deal with it, but no significant pain or exertion. If that happens, I'd have to cut back.
If I were you, I think I'd cut back to hip or thereabouts first rather than going all the way up to BSL. Just to see if I was happier at hip. Fingertip to BSL is a loooot of length.

I feel it, it's starting to become a point of discomfort and pain for me. I never thought this would be a problem for me, because many people still grow to floor length (like on LHC).

I want to cut a significant portion off (estimated to be at least 21" from my current length back to a bit lower than BSL) so I can SELL IT! I've never done that before, but I look forward to the money to put towards for school, or a trip, or even wigs. I've been itching to try new colors, and I was never able to really fit all my hair underneath a cap without it being uncomfortable or obviously bulky. If I hate it, I suppose I can just grow it back to waist length, which shouldn't be too long.

[Lunnafindel]

For me it's when I step on it, and when it goes down the drain when I'm showering, that's gross. shudder:

But all the things you're talking about both manageable and up to each individual to decide for themself. For example: I have an instinctive flip of the head I do when I'm sitting down or getting in a car so my braid doesn't get caught (though sitting on hair really isn't a nuisance at all), and I almost always wear my hair up, so it doesn't get caught in door handles. Wearing it almost all the time in a low bun means it never hurts my head, though I've heard the opposite from other people, so that, too, is individual preference. I'm in the habit of picking up my hair every time I brush it, so the tumbleweeds aren't a problem, and honestly I think longer hair is cooler in the summer than shoulder(ish) length hair because you can bun it effectively so it's off your neck and that's the coolest possible style. All of these are comfortable and pleasant...for me.

But everyone has different priorities, and different bodies, so what is comfortable for me may not be for someone else, and vice versa (I'm sure I could develop new habits for floor+ hair if I wanted to and be just as comfortable, but I don't want to, so that's my limit).

I like the idea of the the two-week rule and incremental cuts. Personally it takes me a year or more to work up to actually cutting my hair, but that's because I'm bad at decisions...:hmm: But two weeks seems reasonable for reasonable people.

[SelenVinland]

I've had super short hair most of my life, so I haven't figured out what too long is for me yet. But knowing myself I think if I'm in danger of sitting on it that's going to be too much for me to handle.

[ynne]

I have short-ish hair by LHC standards, but I imagine that hair that would take too long to detangle/style, or that would get in my way too much, would be the limit for me. Pain would be a hard limit. I am really not sure yet what obstacle I will run into first, though!

As for the big cut all the way above waist... do you know how fast your hair grows? Before you cut such a big section, I think it could be interesting and helpful to calculate how long it could take to grow back to the next milestone(s). Just in case you regretted it later, so you can weight all your options. I think you could love the change, but since you will not have the benefit of gradual cutting back until you find the perfect length, I would just really think it through. :)

No matter how you decide to approach it, I hope you will have a lot of fun with your new length!!

[bparnell75]

I got to classic and then trimmed 3 inches for a better hemline. I really do not like sitting on my hair. but now I a gong to just see where it goes when I get back to classic definitely by Christmas.

I do strongly advise to go slow in the cuts. You can always go a little shorter, but might regret a large chop.

[enting]

I've noticed an interesting thing that sometimes a certain length will feel too long or too annoying to someone, but then a length longer than that will feel like less of a hassle to them. I don't like my hair falling into things or onto the floor, but it's starting to get easier for me to tie my ends in a self-knot (or knot bun if you prefer) which leaves most of my length loose and my scalp not too confined, but it effectively shortens my length which helps just a smidge.

I'm still trying to decide on what's too long for me. I think hip-tbl was the sweet spot before my hair started feeling heavy and before I was constantly sitting on the ends. But I think once I fully learn new habits to move my hair every time I sit it will get easier, which means that longer hair may not be more difficult for me. I am more curious to see how long it can get than annoyed by its length so I'm not cutting back yet, but if the annoyance gets stronger than the curiosity I think it makes sense and is worth it to start cutting back.

I hope you figure out what will make you happiest and go for it!

[redfrau]

I’m loving this thread and how it shows how accepting and supportive this community is. I haven’t had my hair long enough since childhood to know what is too long for me, but I do know that once I reach APL, I tend to cut it back. I’ve got some psychological block against going past that length. I’d like to get to BSL and then decide. I LOVE the idea of a two week cooling off period before getting it cut. I might make a pledge thread for that! Maybe even longer than two weeks. I get so impulsive!

[SnowSpot]

I haven’t reached that absolute point yet, but I think I’ve reached the point where it’s too long (for me) to wear it down comfortably in the everyday life. That point seems to be Bra Strap. The hair gets stuck in the armpits, between the chairs, in the car seats, between the safety belts... and now, in Middle Back, I’m starting to have discomfort sleeping with it braided, the braid gets stuck under me. I may have to work up a new sleeping style, maybe some kind of a braided bun without pins. :)

[MusicalSpoons]

esfand have you tried many different bun styles? There are also updos that are not buns but keep the hair safely up and out of the way. Not that I'm trying to dissuade you from cutting, just hoping to help explore all the options first (and maybe if you find you can happily grow longer, you'll be able to sell a longer length and then possibly regrow to there in the future if you wanted).

Lunnafindel I've not developed the habit of keeping hair out of the way *because* it's always up in a bun :laugh: though on a small scale just when it's down for some reason before or after bed, I guess I do have habits for that. Wrapping it around my neck doesn't feel great but is effective, especially for bathroom trips.

redfrau there is indeed a Two-week rule thread :grin: https://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=139091

[Dark40]

I've always dreamed of having classic or mid-thigh length hair. That's when I've said my limit in length is going to be. I don't think that I can handle it any longer than that. But who knows? I'm going to grow it out to see how long it will grow, and if it gets to a point where I can't handle it any longer. Then, I will cut back to TBL.

[BleachedBerry]

I've wanted long hair since I was 17, and was able to finally get to my dream length of full virgin hair 8 years later. Now, my hair is classic length and as much as I love it, it's beginning to feel like it's too much to handle. It goes past my fingertips so when I brush my hair, it's a bit more effort. It's also getting to a point where it's starting to hurt my neck from the weight no matter how I style it, which I never imagined would be a problem for me - this is the main reason I wrote this post. I am thinking of trimming back to bra strap, which is a bit shorter than waist length - which was I think the perfect length for me.

When do you decide if a length is too long for you?


My thinking is kinda of distorted when it comes to my hair. The longest my hair has been is about an inch or so above my butt and I still didn't feel it was long.
I hope someday to grow long enough to have this dilemma.

[Bat]

Maybe get an under cut and shaved back and sides, so your long part will cover it, and hopefully it will ease the scalp discomfort.
Or cut to the previous milestone slowly, that way you can find the perfect length for you so you can have length and comfort

[Deborah]

I think it's too long for you when rather than making you happy your hair is annoying you. It sounds like that's where you are right now. Do what makes you happy. I think your plan sounds good. :flower:

[redfrau]

redfrau there is indeed a Two-week rule thread :grin: https://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=139091
Of course there is! 😆 Thanks so much for sharing it with me 😊

[BethiBerries]

I'm not there at the moment but every few years when its a considerable length (waist to hip) usually when I get frustrated with the amount of time it takes to manage it.

[eringrows]

My goal is to maintain for a little while when I reach TB and thicken my ends up... then maybe classic. I think anything past that would be too long for me to deal with!

[Eleanor_]

I haven't got there yet! My ends are just reaching BCL, which is the longest my hair has ever been. I'm expecting it will be about classic that I start getting annoyed with my hair - I ride and cycle, so unless I start folding my plait that's when it will start interfering.
I've been doing the wearing your hair up challenge for the last month, which has made me realise my scalp is quite sensitive so I can only wear a bun for about 2 days before it starts hurting.

[lostchyld]

I've noticed an interesting thing that sometimes a certain length will feel too long or too annoying to someone, but then a length longer than that will feel like less of a hassle to them. I don't like my hair falling into things or onto the floor, but it's starting to get easier for me to tie my ends in a self-knot (or knot bun if you prefer) which leaves most of my length loose and my scalp not too confined, but it effectively shortens my length which helps just a smidge.

I'm still trying to decide on what's too long for me. I think hip-tbl was the sweet spot before my hair started feeling heavy and before I was constantly sitting on the ends. But I think once I fully learn new habits to move my hair every time I sit it will get easier, which means that longer hair may not be more difficult for me. I am more curious to see how long it can get than annoyed by its length so I'm not cutting back yet, but if the annoyance gets stronger than the curiosity I think it makes sense and is worth it to start cutting back.

I hope you figure out what will make you happiest and go for it!

I’m an extreme example of that. If my hair is shorter than BSL and longer than 1”, I hate it. Which is a multi year gap in the scheme of growing.

If I crop shorter than BSL again, it’s probably the last time and I’ll have a short pixie or buzz for ever. The two things I regret about my buzz was that I waited so long to do it and that I had to pass through all the stages that hate in order to grow it out once I decided to go back to long hair.

I’m a sponsor of big hair changes. It’s not uncommon for me to take waist or longer hair to a super short pixie. The only time I regret cutting is when I try to step back to the length I really want. As a result, I tend to just lose every inch at once when I decide to cut.

My advice is to cut dry if you have any curls or waves at all. Really long to BSL can get a lot shorter than BSL in a hurry if cut wet.

[jane_marie]

I guess my plan is to stop growing my hair when it becomes too much a hassle. Since I have found some go to styles I love and will be able to keep doing as my hair grows I'm pretty sure "tto long" for me is going to be when I start getting headaches from the weight. :shrug:

[Hexen]

I couldn't tell you yet.
But I'll letcha know when I reach that point.
Don't hold your breath though. It's gonna be awhile.

[0xalis]

My hair will be too long for me if it starts to get too heavy, even when worn down, and I have no idea what length that would be because of my disability (EDS).
Could be that I'll never like anything past APL! It's been so long since my hair's been long that it's pretty much all new territory for me again.


If it's past fingertips, that's longer than classic length? :hmm:


Not necessarily. I have short arms and a long torso, classic and FTL are exactly the same thing on me!

[Hexen]

Not necessarily. I have short arms and a long torso, classic and FTL are exactly the same thing on me!

Ah, so classic length is still just relative to the physical dimensions of ones actual body, rather than a specific measurable length.
I openly admit that I'm no hair lingo aficionado.
Mine just kinda happened.
I don't do anything really special to it. I just try and take care of it. :p

[Bat]

Heights as well promotiobs is a big thing too like knee on a 5 foot person would be roughly hip on someone who is 6 foot so using milestones is better in my opinion

[auburntressed]

Fingertip length for me is longer than classic length. Everyone in my family has very long limbs.

If I’m capable fo getting my hair to knee length, I will. I don’t know yet if it will grow that long. Afterwards, I plan to keep my hair somewhere between classic and FTL. I enjoy classic quite a bit, but I’d rather not have hair that is longer than my arm due to difficulty in brushing it.

[Servana]

Every time my hair grows past waist it becomes so tangly and unmanageable. It also gets caught in things and under people! That's where I'm at right now. I'm growing back to hip but I'm starting to get really irritated. This is why I usually cut my hair short when I reach hip.

I don't have any problems with tangles when my hair is waist or above... I just want the look of hip length hair with the manageability of waist or MBL...

OP, if you want to cut back to BSL then go for it. Especially if you're getting money lol. BSL is much easier to handle and keep looking neat. I myself often get to hip or waist and cut back to shoulder.

[Hexen]

When I can be in the American mid-south, make a thin braid, attach it between two cans, and then talk to someone over in Mongolia or something, then it's possible that it could be getting a bit too long.
I think a micro-trim though would be in order.

[Tinyponies]

When I can be in the American mid-south, make a thin braid, attach it between two cans, and then talk to someone over in Mongolia or something, then it's possible that it could be getting a bit too long.
I think a micro-trim though would be in order.
With two braids you could send one the other way to the same location, thus giving yourself stereo sound. IMHO. But YMMV.

Eta: don’t be too hasty on the trimming.

[Hexen]

With two braids you could send one the other way to the same location, thus giving yourself stereo sound. IMHO. But YMMV.

Eta: don’t be too hasty on the trimming.

True.
But along with the two braids, it would also require also four cans.
However at least the sound quality would be binaural though.

[TinaRider]

I'd suggest you cut it back slowly. You can try HL. Then you can try WL. If it's still too long then go to BSL. Also, make sure you leave a week between cuts so that you've got time to try out the length. Hope this helps. :o:o:o

[soprano]

I have done big cuts twice. Once I went from classic to collarbone, and the other time classic to BSL.

I know it's time when my hair becomes more work than fun. When my braid gets caught in my pants or the car seat belt retractor or hits the back of the toilet seat, I can't stand it. My scalp demands to be washed every day and past my tailbone, detangling afterwards gets difficult.

My word of advice is to have a plan for styling it the morning after. If you go to BSL, you know you can do a ponytail and a bun. If you have it cut at a salon, ask the stylist to do something fun, too. That first wash will be MAGIC! So easy!

[CuteCrow]

I agree with cutting it gradually. It's easier to regret big cuts than smaller ones, and that way you can see if maybe classic is just the limit length and you are happy with slightly shorter hair like hip.
For me I think my 'too long' will be when it starts getting caught on everything or maybe when it takes too much work to keep the damage away

[TinaRider]

Too long for me will be when my hair starts to annoy me while I wear it down and I need to wear it up most of the time. I expect this will happen around waist length, but we'll see.