Why do people seem to think that long hair makes people look older?

[jane_marie]

Personally, I associate long hair with youth. I find the thought that people look older with longer hair bizare.

Why do you think that people associate longer hair with being old?

[lapushka]

I would rather think the opposite. Who thinks that? I have never heard of that. :)

[AmaryllisRed]

Oh my goodness yes.
All the little old ladies have short hair. All the teenagers have long hair.
And yet someone chops their hair off and everyone immediately says, "You look so much younger!"
I think I look older with short hair, your typical thirtysomething mom. Long hair helps me maintain the delusion that I am young and full of vim and vigor. :)

[CopperButterfly]

I have no idea. I'm with you, I associate long hair with youth. The vast majority of older ladies that I know have really short hair. But maybe it's the bun? There is an old stereotype of the granny with the white bun ( like in the Tweety bird cartoon).

[Cg]

I also have not heard this, but I'm guessing the youth of the poster combined with undefined "longer" and "older" may explain the apparent confusion.

[jane_marie]

Oh my goodness yes.
All the little old ladies have short hair. All the teenagers have long hair.
And yet someone chops their hair off and everyone immediately says, "You look so much younger!"
I think I look older with short hair, your typical thirtysomething mom. Long hair helps me maintain the delusion that I am young and full of vim and vigor. :)

I wonder if all of the little old ladies have short hair to make them look "younger"?

My mom has started telling me that I'm "too old" for long hair and that it makes me look "much older". :rolleyes:

[nycelle]

Just like with everything else, there's no one size fits all. Some people look older, some younger.

[jane_marie]

I would rather think the opposite. Who thinks that? I have never heard of that. :)


I also have not heard this, but I'm guessing the youth of the poster combined with undefined "longer" and "older" may explain the apparent confusion.

Perhaps it's regional. Maybe some sort of Southern and Midwestern US thing? I've heard all my life that long hair makes women over 25 look older and that it's inappropriate.

[Obsidian]

I get it, I really do. There are a ton of make over videos that show longhairs getting a cut who end up looking younger but there aren't many showing makeovers that show the person looking older.It's going to depend on the person, some look better short, some long.

[iforgotmylogin]

As a dude, I've been told to grow up and cut my hair before. No can do

[jane_marie]

I get it, I really do. There are a ton of make over videos that show longhairs getting a cut who end up looking younger but there aren't many showing makeovers that show the person looking older.It's going to depend on the person, some look better short, some long.

Yeah but in those shows the person has had their hair and makeup professionally done after and did it themselves before. Of course you are going to look more polished if so much effort was put in to make a person look that way. Those makeover shows are an unrealistic standard.

[Cg]

I wonder if all of the little old ladies have short hair to make them look "younger"?

My mom has started telling me that I'm "too old" for long hair and that it makes me look "much older". :rolleyes:

As a little old lady, I assure you the reason most of us keep hair short is simply because it's the strongly enforced accepted societal norm, not in some fruitless attempt to look younger.

I think your mother may have bought into this established norm as well, thus because your are older than 18 (or whatever arbitrary number) long hair is "inappropriate." Luckily you can decide for yourself what is appropriate for you.

[jane_marie]

As a little old lady, I assure you the reason most of us keep hair short is simply because it's the strongly enforced accepted societal norm, not in some fruitless attempt to look younger.

Off topic but I think it's sad that that is the enforced social norm. I think that silver and white long hair is the most gorgeous hair their is. I'm really looking forward to that coloration.

[lapushka]

My mom is 74 and she dyes her hair a mid-tone blonde. She is gray all over, but it really (I have to be honest) does not suit her. She only dyes it 3 to 4 times a year (because she hates the chemicals, and has a pretty good dye now from Syoss) and so the color lifts off a little as the roots grow out, and so you barely see the gray as it grows out.

It is a YMMV thing. I do hate it when people just randomly say you are too old for long hair. Fortunately, I haven't had that happen too often.

[Groovy Granny]

I think it is the opposite ~ if anything, people here in the Northeast would think I was TRYING to look 'young' with ponytails and hair toys.

As an 'old lady'....I just look like an 'old lady with long hair' :p LOL

Cutting as you get older was the norm here....as was permed/bluish white hair.....I think in an attempt to look younger they then went darker :doh:
Here everyone cuts/curls/dyes....even the old ladies dye their hair dark.....again they just look like 'old ladies with dyed hair' ....no one is fooled :shrug:

I tried it short as my silver grew in and decided it was NOT for me....I was once a long hair and wanted it back again..... if anything just to manage my wurly hair better.

Initially my DH was leery about me going longer because I was too old for it (61 at the time))....but he changed his mind :heart:

[jane_marie]

As an 'old lady'....I just look like an 'old lady with long hair' :p LOL

If anything, people here in the Northeast would think I was TRYING to look 'young' with ponytails and hair toys.

Cutting as you get older was the norm here....as was permed/bluish white hair.....I think in an attempt to look younger they then went darker :doh:
Here everyone cuts/curls/dyes....even the old ladies dye their hair dark.....again they just look like 'old ladies with dyed hair' ....no one is fooled :shrug:

My mother recently stopped dying her hair. It's short of course... you know that short cut that ladies tend to get... you know the one. Anyway, I was shocked when I saw her because the titanium color with silver threads looked so lovely on her. Before she was dying it a dark reddish brown not unlike one of the many shades in my sig pic. :P Now that it's her natural shade it looks so much more lovely. It fits her like a glove.

I love your hair GG. I've told you countless times. I have a couple of favourite heads of hair here on LHC and yours is certainly among them. :)

[CopperButterfly]

Off topic but I think it's sad that that is the enforced social norm. I think that silver and white long hair is the most gorgeous hair their is. I'm really looking forward to that coloration.

I agree whole heartedly! I plan to grow out my henna in my 40's so that I can see my silvers come in. I've loved long white/silver hair since I was a little girl, and it's something I aspire to.

[Groovy Granny]

My mother recently stopped dying her hair. It's short of course... you know that short cut that ladies tend to get... you know the one. Anyway, I was shocked when I saw her because the titanium color with silver threads looked so lovely on her. Before she was dying it a dark reddish brown not unlike one of the many shades in my sig pic. :P Now that it's her natural shade it looks so much more lovely. It fits her like a glove.

I love your hair GG. I've told you countless times. I have a couple of favourite heads of hair here on LHC and yours is certainly among them. :)

Good luck to your Mom; her hair sounds lovely:cheer:

Thank you; you are very sweet....and made my day :flowers:

[jane_marie]

I agree whole heartedly! I plan to grow out my henna in my 40's so that I can see my silvers come in. I've loved long white/silver hair since I was a little girl, and it's something I aspire to.

Me too, it's silly but I have always thought that older ladies with long hair look like ethereal and lovely like sages or even goddesses. :)

I wonder if when we are that age the new norm will be long hair on older women instead of short. When you consider the dyed grey trend it doesn't seem that far fetched.

[GrowinIt]

I'm not sure why they would think that, I think my longer hair makes me look younger, usually people say I look a lot younger than I actually am, probably because I sort of wear my hair like a little girl does, well, by that I mean, you know, long and like clip up one side, or clip up must the front bit in the middle, or stuff like that. I could see, maybe a bun would make me look older though, I feel like wearing my hair down makes me look younger. I think looking young/old is partly a styling issue, and also how you dress, etc, and very individualized, no one size fits all for a certain type of hair looking young or old.

[MoonRabbit]

I think my long hair makes me appear older. Of course there is always an exception as when I do a particular youngish looking style. But when it is down I can totally understand why some people might think this. My hair at this length does absolutely nothing for me, it is just a curtain that hangs, it pulls my features down which can create the illusion of maturity.

[Groovy Granny]

Of course wearing a bun has that 'old lady look' to some people....they must think of Granny in the Looney Tunes Cartoons :shrug:

I just see it as a hairstyle for long hair .

No 'old ladies' wear buns here ...or even have long hair....another gal my age and I are the exceptions :lol:

[elise.autumn]

Me too, it's silly but I have always thought that older ladies with long hair look like ethereal and lovely like sages or even goddesses. :)

I wonder if when we are that age the new norm will be long hair on older women instead of short. When you consider the dyed grey trend it doesn't seem that far fetched.

Yess I have always wanted to keep my natural color when I go grey/white, and now I am also excited to keep it long then. Let's start changing culture's perception of needing to dye/cut older hair! Well, I at least will start helping in 30 years :)

[Wendyclaire]

I’ve been told that more then once by other women. I’ve even had pictures of short hairstyles put on my desk when I was working. My advice, never never ever believe what another woman says to you about your hair or your looks in general. So much jealousy if you’re older and have long hair! Only please yourself!!

[cathair]

I would guess some people just think people look younger with freshly cut hair.

[Ylva]

There's a lot of variety in 'short', too. My mom, for example, is 65 and keeps a buzzcut that is sometimes as short as 3 mm. I think that certainly makes her look younger than having her hair like this (https://i.pinimg.com/originals/91/6c/f9/916cf99d68d40b2e55847735d038c9a4.jpg), for example.

ETA: She doesn't keep her hair a certain way to look younger, though. She keeps a buzzcut because she likes how handy and easy it is.

[Entangled]

I think people tend to mix youth with trendiness. Styled hair gives off the impression that you care about your appearance and social norms, while hair that’s largely natural and long on older people is a sign you’ve “let yourself go;” meanwhile young people are just allowed to get away without makeup and long hair more than older people.

[shelomit]

I can't say that I've encountered this attitude very widely, but I grew up in a strongly Anabaptist region. Things vary a little by sect, of course, but in most it was common for girls/women to wear their hair down until they got baptized, and then to start wearing a bun under a cap. Therefore you had a lot of girls with short-ish (~shoulder length, usually) hair who started growing their hair out after baptism, which was most often in the late teens/early twenties.

[Volchitsa]

I've always associated long hair with youth. There's something undeniably feminine & energetic about it, possibly the idea of it flowing in motion? As far as cultural ideas, here in the United States the stereotypical "mom haircut" is shortish & usually a bob. Shorter hairstyles are usually more practical & mature which is linked to something we gain as we age.

[jane_marie]

I can't say that I've encountered this attitude very widely, but I grew up in a strongly Anabaptist region. Things vary a little by sect, of course, but in most it was common for girls/women to wear their hair down until they got baptized, and then to start wearing a bun under a cap. Therefore you had a lot of girls with short-ish (~shoulder length, usually) hair who started growing their hair out after baptism, which was most often in the late teens/early twenties.

Oh that's interesting! I'm always fascinated with the religious reasons people have longer hair. :)

[Robot Ninja]

It's probably all those makeover shows where the older women with long hair either pay no attention to their hair, so it's in a center part with limp roots and frizzy ends, which drags their face down and makes them look older, or have been wearing the same hairstyle that was cool when they were 20 but is now extremely dated and makes them look like they're desperately trying to cling to youth, which makes them look older. Then a professional stylist gives them a modern haircut that flatters their face, of course they're going to look younger. The older people on here, who have well-cared-for hair that isn't stuck in the '80s, aren't going to magically look younger if they cut it.

The other reason I think is that society just expects older women to give up their long hair just like we're expected to give up anything else that is fun and pretty and maybe even *gasp* sexy, because older women are expected to be responsible and invisible and never have any fun. And since older women are expected to try to look younger at any cost, "your long hair makes you look older" is one way people pressure longer-haired older women into getting a haircut, even if it isn't true.

[MusicalSpoons]

My sister (22yo) recently cut her hair from ~APL to around neck/shoulder length. She likes it and plans to keep it short, but she caught sight of herself in the mirror with a particular jumper on and commented the hairstyle made her look middle-aged - a 'mom-cut', or 'Karen hairstyle'. Her face is clearly youthful so she'll get away with it for a few years yet, but it was interesting that even she thought that on first glance in comfy/lounging clothing.

I don't know why there is a perception that long hair makes people look older :shrug: there's certainly an Old Lady Hairstyle guaranteed to make the wearer look old, that's for sure, but beyond that ... ?

I do hope the next generation of silver hairs buck the stupid notion that silver/white hair has to be short. I completely agree with jane_marie that long silver/white hair is beautiful; there really is something special about it. Of course if the trend ever were to go the other way, maybe it would become slightly less special by virtue of being less rare, but no less beautiful!!

Edit: a TV presenter returned from maternity leave to a daily show today, with an ear-length styled bob. It does look nice, but her hair wasn't a huge amount longer before - maybe CBL? - and it got a lot of positive attention as a style and as something new Mums are virtually expected to do. It wasn't the cut that made me sad (of course, it's her hair and her business), but the comments about it being almost expected of new parents :-( Of course new parents aren't going to have lots of time to devote to their hair, but the expectation that longer = more work is so stuck in the idea that hair has to be maintained with colour and styling. Harrumph.

[Chromis]

It's probably all those makeover shows where the older women with long hair either pay no attention to their hair, so it's in a center part with limp roots and frizzy ends, which drags their face down and makes them look older, or have been wearing the same hairstyle that was cool when they were 20 but is now extremely dated and makes them look like they're desperately trying to cling to youth, which makes them look older. Then a professional stylist gives them a modern haircut that flatters their face, of course they're going to look younger. The older people on here, who have well-cared-for hair that isn't stuck in the '80s, aren't going to magically look younger if they cut it.

The other reason I think is that society just expects older women to give up their long hair just like we're expected to give up anything else that is fun and pretty and maybe even *gasp* sexy, because older women are expected to be responsible and invisible and never have any fun. And since older women are expected to try to look younger at any cost, "your long hair makes you look older" is one way people pressure longer-haired older women into getting a haircut, even if it isn't true.

Hey don't be dissing my haircut! And I prefer to think of my "flat" roots as "sleek" tankyouverymuch. (Okay, so the frizz might be giving that away, but maybe if you squint.)

Also, I prefer to think of my hair as stuck in the 60's :p

[jane_marie]

Hey don't be dissing my haircut! And I prefer to think of my "flat" roots as "sleek" tankyouverymuch. (Okay, so the frizz might be giving that away, but maybe if you squint.)

Also, I prefer to think of my hair as stuck in the 60's :p

Sometimes I wish LHC had a "like" button.

I would like this so hard. :)

[sugar&nutmeg]

I'm an old lady.

With 'the haircut' (yes, we all know the one), my hair and my face "match". It's expected, normal, nothing-to-see-here. My long hair coupled with my old-lady face can be a surprise, I suppose. Therefore, it may seem my long hair "makes me look older".

Still, the societal norm of "old lady = short hair" is not enforced. The hair police are not going to drag me off and cut my hair, if I decide not to follow the herd. I get to decide. If I appear too scary or 'unpredictable' for some people's comfort, well...they're not my people, obviously.

Why would I want to look younger, anyway? I've never understood that. I get the blah-blah about discrimination and making a living, but we've allowed that to happen, too. We are society, after all. If we cave, instead of fighting back, well...I guess that's a choice.

[Dark40]

I've heard of this too. They've always said that short hair makes you look younger. Some people need just realize that short hair is not for everybody. Especially, me with a wide face and forehead.

[lapis_lazuli]

As others have said, it's just an expectation. It seems long hair is reserved for certain age groups only, and once you pass the threshold, you're meant to give it up for the sake of being "mature". I don't know about long hair pulling features down so much...my hunch is people have this attribution of long hair with young people, and see long hair on anyone older as mismatched and emphasizing their age in contrast. Thus the "cutting your hair will make you look younger!" :rolleyes: That stuff is all learned, it's not inherently true.

[bparnell75]

In my church circle several of the "old" ladies have started growing their hair long after I had mine long for about 5 years. I have give them sticks and Tutorials too. Short hair is supposed to be easier to care for. ....but I disagree unless you are rich enough to go to the hair dresser every week.

[spidermom]

I think whether you look older (or younger) with long hair is highly individual. In particular, long hair hanging straight down or pulled straight back into a bun can magnify things like dark circles and wrinkles because it boxes the face in and gives nothing else to look at. A short haircut can add a lot of movement and interest so that attention is drawn away from the face. Other styling tricks can do the same thing.

But have the length of hair that you enjoy no matter what other people think.

[jane_marie]

I'm an old lady.

With 'the haircut' (yes, we all know the one), my hair and my face "match". It's expected, normal, nothing-to-see-here. My long hair coupled with my old-lady face can be a surprise, I suppose. Therefore, it may seem my long hair "makes me look older".

Still, the societal norm of "old lady = short hair" is not enforced. The hair police are not going to drag me off and cut my hair, if I decide not to follow the herd. I get to decide. If I appear too scary or 'unpredictable' for some people's comfort, well...they're not my people, obviously.

Why would I want to look younger, anyway? I've never understood that. I get the blah-blah about discrimination and making a living, but we've allowed that to happen, too. We are society, after all. If we cave, instead of fighting back, well...I guess that's a choice.

I'm confused. Do you have long or short hair?

To me "the haircut" looks like this
https://i.imgur.com/bBeSJ5x.jpg
...or at least that's the one that women over 45 around here tend to get.

Your post seems to say you have long hair. I don't know. I must have missed something. I'm confused.

Either way people can do what they want. I don't know. The whole thing kind of makes me think about that scene from Steel Magnolia's where the daughter just after having her baby goes to the salon and has all of her hair chopped off. I think they included that because it's such a relate-able... even expected occurrence. I think women over a certain age (mid 20's?) are expected to be caretakers and so cutting your hair shows a self sacrifice that makes you have more time to take care of other's via not spending that time on your hair.

I don't know. I'm not a mother. I'm childfree by choice but as a 34 year old woman I have found that people make assumptions.

This has very little to do with why people say long hair make people look older though. Actually, it's just more data on what I feel is evidence of the contrary. Still, I have seen many situations where people get hair cut shorter and are told "you look so much younger!".

I just don't get it. :shrug:

[Dark40]

In my church circle several of the "old" ladies have started growing their hair long after I had mine long for about 5 years. I have give them sticks and Tutorials too. Short hair is supposed to be easier to care for. ....but I disagree unless you are rich enough to go to the hair dresser every week.

Yes, I've also believed for religious reasons that you should never cut your hair. As the saying goes in the Bible..."A woman's hair is her crown and glory." I think that's sweet that you've encouraged several of the "old" ladies in your church to grow out their hair long! And, gave them hair sticks and Tuturials too. I agree with you too, that short hair isn't easier to take care of. I've always thought that taking care of long hair is much easier than taking care of short hair.

[Lady Stardust]

I have seen many situations where people get hair cut shorter and are told "you look so much younger!".

I think it’s just the change in appearance, rather than the length of the hair.

People said that I looked younger when I went from APL-ish to pixie. Now that I’m back at APL people say I look younger than I did with short hair.

The portrait in my attic is looking really cruddy though....
ETA: Weak attempt at a joke...reference to Dorian Gray. I forget sometimes that double meanings aren’t a good thing in writing, with people that I don’t know.

[Cg]

I think it’s just the change in appearance, rather than the length of the hair.

People said that I looked younger when I went from APL-ish to pixie. Now that I’m back at APL people say I look younger than I did with short hair.

The portrait in my attic is looking really cruddy though....


Thank you for the laugh!

[jane_marie]

I think it’s just the change in appearance, rather than the length of the hair.

People said that I looked younger when I went from APL-ish to pixie. Now that I’m back at APL people say I look younger than I did with short hair.

The portrait in my attic is looking really cruddy though....
ETA: Weak attempt at a joke...reference to Dorian Gray. I forget sometimes that double meanings aren’t a good thing in writing, with people that I don’t know.

Do, do you think "You look so much younger!" is just a cheap easy compliment people give just because they feel they are obligated to say something when they notice a drastic change?

[Lady Stardust]

Do, do you think "You look so much younger!" is just a cheap easy compliment people give just because they feel they are obligated to say something when they notice a drastic change?

Well 10 years has passed so I think I look older, but the various haircuts did make me look very different. I think it’s more to do with whether my face was framed, whether or not I had a fringe and when I did, how short and blunt the fringe was. I think it’s more to do with harsh versus soft for me, which people might equate with old versus young.

I don’t think it was anything to do with length, and I don’t think they were throw away comments because my face changes completely dependent on the cut. I also generally do look young for my age.

[sugar&nutmeg]

I have long hair. Sorry my post caused confusion.

I have a sneaking suspicion that some people say "you look younger with short hair" because they believe that's the best possible thing they could say, that's the ultimate compliment, in our youth-obsessed culture.

I have no desire to look younger. So if someone said to me, "You would look younger with short hair" I'd reply, "Wow, thanks for letting me know. If that's the case, I definitely won't be cutting my hair!"

How I look to others (beyond clean and reasonably tidy) is no longer anything-like a priority for me. Younger? Older? Who decides? Who cares?

[jane_marie]

I have long hair. Sorry my post caused confusion.

I have a sneaking suspicion that some people say "you look younger with short hair" because they believe that's the best possible thing they could say, that's the ultimate compliment, in our youth-obsessed culture.

I have no desire to look younger. So if someone said to me, "You would look younger with short hair" I'd reply, "Wow, thanks for letting me know. If that's the case, I definitely won't be cutting my hair!"

How I look to others (beyond clean and reasonably tidy) is no longer anything-like a priority for me. Younger? Older? Who decides? Who cares?

I can understand that. I just want to look like me. Kind of like GroovyGranny said, I think that with long hair I just look like me with long hair and with short hair I look like me with short hair. I don't look older or younger. I just look like me and that's all I really want to look like: some version of myself at my age. :shrug:

[lapushka]

I can understand that. I just want to look like me. Kind of like GroovyGranny said, I think that with long hair I just look like me with long hair and with short hair I look like me with short hair. I don't look older or younger. I just look like me and that's all I really want to look like: some version of myself at my age. :shrug:

Good for you. I think it's important to not let anyone influence you, or you'll never get it longer.

BSL? Fine, but beyond that people are usually a little apprehensive... and they go, "that long"? I mean even my mom when I told her I was growing it that long, but it's all said with love of course (it's my mom after all). She is very supportive now that it is classic, though!!! :D I had classic as a child (10/11 years old). And she was supportive of that as well. :D

[0xalis]

A long time ago old women did have long hair, and usually wore it up all the time like a lot of us do here.
But I think it's just this weird idea that's been passed along through generations even though it's no longer relevant?

I also think people say that people "look younger" when they get their hair cut just because they look different at all.
Their mood could also improve with the hair cut if they enjoy it, giving them youthful vibes.

I personally hope growing my hair out makes me look more mature, as I look Exactly the same as when I was 13, and I'm 23 now.

[Ligeia Noire]

Yup. That frame of mind is very ingrained in my country too.
I was reading the thread and a certain video came to mind. Most of us have seen the white gown lady with quite long hair, parted in the middle that gets the Tyra Banks makeover into a soccer mom, right? Because all of us long hairs, dress like ghosts straight from the Middle Ages....
Oh my, The Media are poison....

[jane_marie]

Yup. That frame of mind is very ingrained in my country too.
I was reading the thread and a certain video came to mind. Most of us have seen the white gown lady with quite long hair, parted in the middle that gets the Tyra Banks makeover into a soccer mom, right? Because all of us long hairs, dress like ghosts straight from the Middle Ages....
Oh my, The Media are poison....

That episode was so disgusting and disturbing. If someone talked to me a that condescending manner like that I would punch them. I've lived through way too much emotional abuse for that to fly.

[Ligeia Noire]

That episode was so disgusting and disturbing. If someone talked to me a that condescending manner like that I would punch them. I've lived through way too much emotional abuse for that to fly.

That's what you put your ass in for by participate on that ****...
Then again, if she had self confidence and loved herself and her hair, she wouldn't be there...

[jane_marie]

That's what you put your ass in for by participate on that ****...

That is true. I suppose If it were me I would not have participated.

[Chromis]

Yup. That frame of mind is very ingrained in my country too.
I was reading the thread and a certain video came to mind. Most of us have seen the white gown lady with quite long hair, parted in the middle that gets the Tyra Banks makeover into a soccer mom, right? Because all of us long hairs, dress like ghosts straight from the Middle Ages....
Oh my, The Media are poison....

I've not seen that show, but I would totally be in for dressing like a ghost straight from the Middle Ages! Sign me on for that!

[Ligeia Noire]

I've not seen that show, but I would totally be in for dressing like a ghost straight from the Middle Ages! Sign me on for that!

Ahahahah signed!
Call Ms.Banks!

[Laurelin]

Yup. That frame of mind is very ingrained in my country too.
I was reading the thread and a certain video came to mind. Most of us have seen the white gown lady with quite long hair, parted in the middle that gets the Tyra Banks makeover into a soccer mom, right? Because all of us long hairs, dress like ghosts straight from the Middle Ages....
Oh my, The Media are poison....

I've never seen that episode so I had to search for it but wow.... I cried, it hit me. That poor girl was just put out there alone on a podium and getting bullied into changing her looks by an entire crowd and a celebrity with her fiance just standing there instead of accepting how she is, all for the sake of profit for the show. Even while she had such beautiful and unique hair with a literal life-long story attached to it. Such shows are simply toxic and apparently socially accepted bullying. :cry: I hope nobody will find their-self in such a situation and doubt their-self like that ever. I hope this sort of shows will become a thing of the past.

[Ylva]

Could anyone link me that episode from somewhere, please?

[jane_marie]

Could anyone link me that episode from somewhere, please?

Not the whole episode but here: redacted

[Chromis]

Ahahahah signed!
Call Ms.Banks!

No, no, I'm in for the before, not the after!

[Ligeia Noire]

No, no, I'm in for the before, not the after!

Ah you smarty pants ;)

[Laurelin]

I think the problem is that the average person seems to think that 'looking old is bad' and 'looking young is good' rather than that each age has it's own charm. In my country it's very common for women to cut their hair to shoulder-length or shorter as soon as they reach circa 25-35 years old just because they're at some point being told ''short hair is easier and makes you look younger''. Allot of people who fear aging are willing to do nearly anything that promises them to look younger, buying a bottle of 100 dollar cream, going through a painful surgery and if hairdressers promise people they'll look younger with a short haircut and hairdye (aka ''the monthly subscription to the hairdresser'') people are willing to go for it. For the whole ''cut for less maintenance'' thing I feel like many people are ill-educated on the differences in maintenance of medium-long hair and short hair and that short hair doesn't have to mean low maintenance.
If you like short hair on yourself then by all means love your hair, but nobody should force anyone to change theirself but I just feel like there is allot of pressure from short haired women towards longer haired women to cut their hair.

I personally I don't think short hair fits me regardless of what age I will become and I can't wait for the silvers to kick in, I love the idea of my hair going from it's current golden color slowly to silver. I think very long silver white hair looks absolutely stunning so I'll totally rock it in the future.

[Ylva]

Not the whole episode but here: redacted

Thank you.

What a sad clip. Her hair was so beautiful and healthy.

[sugar&nutmeg]

What Laurelin said:

I think the problem is that the average person seems to think that 'looking old is bad' and 'looking young is good, rather than that each age has its own charm.'

Since we've gone off-piste a bit anyway, I'll just add:

The worship and pursuit of youth is so sad, in large part because it's delusional. And ultimately hopeless. It doesn't change the reality that each of us is 'X' years old, and aging, whatever 'younger' (better!) age we might manage, briefly, to convince ourselves we 'look like'.

As Rose Castorini (Moonstruck) put it: "...I just want you to know, whatever you do, you're gonna die."

Tick tock, tick tock. Surely there are better things upon which to focus, than physical appearance?

I'm Team Joan Hickson's Miss Marple. Nemesis.

[Sarahlabyrinth]

What Laurelin said:


Since we've gone off-piste a bit anyway, I'll just add:

The worship and pursuit of youth is so sad, in large part because it's delusional. And ultimately hopeless. It doesn't change the reality that each of us is 'X' years old, and aging, whatever 'younger' (better!) age we might manage, briefly, to convince ourselves we 'look like'.

As Rose Castorini (Moonstruck) put it: "...I just want you to know, whatever you do, you're gonna die."

Tick tock, tick tock. Surely there are better things upon which to focus, than physical appearance?

I'm Team Joan Hickson's Miss Marple. Nemesis.

This reminds me of a conversation which happened in Vanuatu between a Westerner and a tribesman from a remote village. The Westerner was explaining about plastic surgery, facelifts etc that could be done on people these days to make them regain a youthful appearance.The tribesman asked "Does it make their blood young too?" When told no, he said "What's the point, then?"

[Joules]

I agree with everyone who said that it's quite the opposite. Young people tend to have longer hair, whilst 30 year olds and above are pressured by society to cut it.

When I was in uni one of my friends cut her APL hair into a pixie and immediately turned from a 20 year old into a 35 year old stay at home mom. That was enough of a reason for me to never ever cut my hair.

[jane_marie]

whoops sorry about that clip Chromis!

[Elodea]

I've not seen that show, but I would totally be in for dressing like a ghost straight from the Middle Ages! Sign me on for that!

Haha yep, I wouldn't mind dressing like a ghost from the Middle Ages once in awhile! Not every day, but it could be interesting to do occasionally...

As for me, I doubt that long hair makes me look older, at least currently.

[SleepyTangles]

I have a long face and long straight hair can definitively make It look quite solemn and tired.

[plonter]

On one hand, long straight hair doesn't suit everyone; regardless of my age it doesn't look good on me and I'm happy to have gotten rid of the straightening iron. But there are more options than cutting it: wearing it up, cutting bangs, diffusing it, pulling it back, ... and this doesn't just apply to older folk. On the other hand the age chop is popular probably because of the standard curriculum at traditional beauty schools: a lot of stylists have trouble understanding what's "flattering" for women of color, older women, less feminine women, and other demographics who don't fit the "standard" mold (white, young, feminine). So they act on cliches such as "long hair makes you look older", or encourage curlies to straighten their hair, or cut weird layers to "soften" a look, because that's all they've been taught; regardless of what the client might want. I also think stylists would rather cut hair than style it differently for a makeover... personally I think it's a conspiracy and Big Scissor is behind it.

I will also agree with the above ^ sentiments about the eternal pursuit of youth and conventional beauty in our culture being quite sad. What a waste of talent and time and love and money society creates by forcing women to focus on one thing above all others.

[0xalis]

personally I think it's a conspiracy and Big Scissor is behind it.


Right!?! Everything is all about the moolah nowadays :rolleyes:

[MoonRabbit]

It definitely goes both ways. Imagine 'Karen Hair' on a 10 year old....that would be odd.

[Kalamazoo]

It definitely goes both ways. Imagine 'Karen Hair' on a 10 year old....that would be odd.

What's Karen Hair? Can you link a picture?

[nycelle]

What's Karen Hair? Can you link a picture?

"Karen" has become the millennial go to for an annoying, middle aged, white woman. So if you're middle aged, and don't like something, or have a complaint, you're now dubbed "Karen" - complete with the short hair "mom" cut. At least that's how it's used here.

Kinda nasty actually.

[jane_marie]

What's Karen Hair? Can you link a picture?

It's a rather mean way to refer to an angle cut that is chin length or shorter. Often it has harsh blonde streaks and is shaved shorter on the neck. People also refer to it as the "Can I speak to your Manager" cut because it's associated with high maintenance soccer mom types.

Example:
https://i.imgur.com/S7UThfp.jpg?1

I don't know as some one who keeps a super short blunt cut baby bang that has been called "terf bangs" by strangers I don't care for the karen hair label... it's a bit derogatory. I'm sure that's not what the person who used the term meant since people do often know the cut by that name.

[Kalamazoo]

Thanks for the picture. You know? I think it's a "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" type thing. I think if you're used to associating that hairstyle with a certain personality type, then it signifies that to you. Having never heard the term before, the hairstyle itself looks kind of cute to me ... but I don't want to go to a beauty parlor, so I'm not likely to get one, and I don't think it would flatter my face shape.

[jane_marie]

Thanks for the picture. You know? I think it's a "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" type thing. I think if you're used to associating that hairstyle with a certain personality type, then it signifies that to you. Having never heard the term before, the hairstyle itself looks kind of cute to me ... but I don't want to go to a beauty parlor, so I'm not likely to get one, and I don't think it would flatter my face shape.

Yeah, in my opinion it's a bit of a shame. It can be a flattering cut for a lot of different facial shapes. I'm not saying everyone should go out and get it or anything but people who do want it shouldn't have to second guess themselves due to some silly internet fueled stigma.

[wishy]

There's an employee at my university with the most beautiful tailbone length hair and I think it makes her look very young. I thought she was a student when I first saw her! I imagine she would look a bit older with shorter hair.

[Kalamazoo]

Discrimination happens whenever the discriminator is feeling somehow inferior to the discriminatee, hence the attempt to "put him/her in his/her place". Love is the answer. Love your enemies. They're only hurting you because they're blinded by their own pain.

[Robot Ninja]

Discrimination happens whenever the discriminator is feeling somehow inferior to the discriminatee, hence the attempt to "put him/her in his/her place". Love is the answer. Love your enemies. They're only hurting you because they're blinded by their own pain.

Or because they're entitled jerks who think they're better than everyone else, and look down on retail workers. Hence, "can I speak to your manager" whenever they don't get their way. I do feel bad for people named Karen who aren't like that; it must suck to have your name associated with that kind of behavior.

[jane_marie]

Or because they're entitled jerks who think they're better than everyone else, and look down on retail workers. Hence, "can I speak to your manager" whenever they don't get their way. I do feel bad for people named Karen who aren't like that; it must suck to have your name associated with that kind of behavior.

I'm just saying I feel bad for nice women who happen to have that haircut and any women who might want it but don't get it because of the stereotype.
Like I said, I keep a short thick blunt cut bang and I had to deal with complete strangers making fun of me and assuming my stance on trans issues because I had "Terf" bangs. I think it's pretty crappy to stereotype a bunch of people just because of how they wear their hair.

[Dutchbraids]

I'm only 18, but people often think I am older because of my hair (TBL). At least on a young person, long hair looks like it took forever to grow, so it does age you a bit.
I also have a hard time dressing in a way that doesn't make me look like I was homeschooled (which I was, admittedly) but in college that isn't a good look. I tend to dress more modern, which really doesn't help anyone trying to figure out how old I am.

[MoonRabbit]

Oh geez people...Karen hair is not that deep, so the style got sucked into a stigma, what style hasn't? There are tons of hair cuts and styles that have been the butt of the joke and given an unwanted identity for instance the great mullet.

[jane_marie]

Oh geez people...Karen hair is not that deep, so the style got sucked into a stigma, what style hasn't? There are tons of hair cuts and styles that have been the butt of the joke and given an unwanted identity for instance the great mullet.

I don't know I kind of think it is that deep especially after I've been discriminated against due to a hairstyle choice of my own. :shrug:

[MoonRabbit]

I don't know I kind of think it is that deep especially after I've been discriminated against due to a hairstyle choice of my own. :shrug:

I'm sorry about that but most of us here have as well to an extent. Long hair isn't exactly the norm in most societies and we tend to push beyond "normal".

Isn't that exactly what this thread ended up proving after all? That there is a stigma to any style.

[jane_marie]

I'm sorry about that but most of us here have as well to an extent. Long hair isn't exactly the norm in most societies and we tend to push beyond "normal".

Isn't that exactly what this thread ended up proving after all? That there is a stigma to any style.

Sorry Moonrabbit. I'm just a bit on edge lately.

[hannabiss]

I've heard this all my life and thought the same thing! Makeover videos all chop womens hair and act like wow she looks young. When its usually a case of long unkempt hair chopped, styled, and then looking put together. When they could actually make the long hair look nice which would also look put together. (I hope that makes sense)

[harpgal]

Personally, I associate long hair with youth. I find the thought that people look older with longer hair bizare.

Why do you think that people associate longer hair with being old?
That is a really good question and one I've never figured out. Personally, it is those pesky fine lines that seem to give one an older look. But I amuse myself by saying that I'm supposed to look this way at my age.

[cjk]

Most people do not use language very precisely.

What they probably mean is that certain hairstyles, I saw the librarian bun listed earlier in the thread, can make a person look older.

And that people who have long hair often throw their hair up into the librarian bun.

I've never associated a specific hair length for the specific age. Though, thinking about it, certain styles do tend to work better at certain ages. Cindy Brady and her pigtails for instance. Pippi Longstocking. Lara Croft and her signature single braid.

Cindy Lou Hoo and whatever the heck that was called.

The people who say things like this are speaking, at best, in vague generalities. Quite imprecise.

[The-Young-Maid]

Or because they're entitled jerks who think they're better than everyone else, and look down on retail workers. Hence, "can I speak to your manager" whenever they don't get their way. I do feel bad for people named Karen who aren't like that; it must suck to have your name associated with that kind of behavior.

This. It's a stereotype for a reason, because it's painfully true. At least when you see them coming you can mentally steel yourself against their wrath.