Hair and mental health

[Dung Beetle]

What connection, if any, does your hair have to your mental health? I see comments coming up again and again in the random thoughts thread that make me think it's relevant to many of us.

Me, I struggle with anxiety. I have to frequently pull my thoughts out of destructive paths, and one way I do this is to substitute neutral thoughts for bad ones. I've found hair to be a good topic to focus on, as it's a safe and apparently bottomless subject for me to obsess over as long as I need it. (Yes, a bottomless well of shallow thoughts. :) )

Mmm, other than that I would say that it also makes me feel safe to physically hide behind...and paradoxically, like an interesting person worthy of notice. Not at the same time of course!

Do you feel a relationship between your hair journey and your mental state?

[Ylva]

Do you feel a relationship between your hair journey and your mental state?

In short, I started to grow out my virgin hair as a symbol of being "reborn" as the person I became after all of my life's traumatic experiences but with wisdom, self-esteem and knowledge of myself rather than depression, fear and anxiety. Well, I still suffer from anxiety, but much less than before. Instead of being scared of people that wronged me badly in the past, I now feel anger, and they no longer have the power to make me weak before them. I've noticed that I am, for the most part, comfortable standing all on my own and that I feel no need to have any friends or "gang" as my support.

This is perhaps not the kind of stuff you were after, but upon reading your question, I made this connection.

[Dung Beetle]

That is exactly what I was hoping for, Ylva! And I like the symbolism of your rebirth.

[AmberWillow]

I coloured my hair fiery copper during the process of going through a messy break up of an abusive relationship. My ex gave me a lot of **** for having bleached blonde hair, calling me a prostitute etc. and accusing me of going blonde to attract other men (even though I am a natural blonde and I'd already bleached it lighter when I met him!). Supposedly, he didn't find it very attractive and he'd find me less attractive if I bleached it again, because, again, he would assume I'd done it to attract other men (he also said he'd break up with me if I got another job in a bar, but I digress). I mentioned that I'd wanted to be a redhead for several years but never had the confidence to do it. He didn't seem to like the idea of me being 'ginger.' So, one night, when our relationship was at rock bottom, I impulsively dumped a load of henna on my head. Sorry, can't reverse it! ;) and dumped his a**.

That was like me being reborn from the flames :p although I still have lasting anxiety and shock from the experiences I had from that relationship, I am no longer the innocent little blonde girl, more a fiery phoenix. :cheer: Not only is my mental health healthier, but my hair is healthier, too. The hair is like an extension of the soul, so I think it makes sense that people equate it to a process of being reborn.

[Laurab]

In general my me tal health is really good. There have been times where I've been stressed and I wanted to cut my hair, but not like I wanted to get a haircut, I wanted to just take some scicsors and hack into it for the sensory experience of it all. I find cutting different textures to be soothing. Never did that though.

[Zesty]

I have bipolar disorder and anxiety issues. My mental health is largely good because of the medication I'm on but before that got sorted out my hair was something to comfort me when I felt bad. Caring for it and distracting myself by learning new styles was a healthy way to deal with my turbulent emotions. Thankfully I never really fixated on it in an unhealthy way, as I know is possible. :o

Now it's something that makes me feel good and calms me when I feel frazzled from everyday stress or overstimulation (I'm a big introvert and need quite a bit of downtime to recharge).

In short, I have a lot of positive feelings about my hair and I think it improves my mental health to care for it. :)

[shelomit]

I don't think there's as direct of a connection for me as some people have outlined here. It is great relief to be able to just toss my hair up in a bun and put on a headscarf on a "low-spoons" day (whether for mental health or my physical issues) and not have to worry about what it will look like down.

[TreesOfEternity]

I have anxiety and my thought process tends to be self destructive and very obsessive.
In the past, I did cut my hair to a pixie twice, as a way of getting rid of as much of myself as possible in an atempt to disconect me from my past.

Now I've learnt to take better care of myself and my aproach has changed, since I don't see myself as the enemy. So my hair has become a part of myself I like and can take pride on, so I protect it from myself and from others.

It growing long doesn't carry the weight of my past anymore, it has become a symbol of pride, love and spiritual growth.

[SleepyTangles]

It was the first time I grew it out. It was the same time I started University, and it was connected to discovering who I was as a person and as an independent adult.

This time is mostly for aesthetic :)

[blackgothicdoll]

My deepest desires to stop hating myself have given me the energy to stop harming my hair and letting it grow. Sometimes that's the best I can do.

[spidermom]

The first thing that comes to mind is that tending to hair as it grows helps to develop patience, and patience is good for my mental health.

[Laurenhope29]

My mental health now is better than it's ever been before... I started a journey towards self-love a couple of years ago and I've come SO far. With that being said, at the beginning of this year i decided i want to grow out my natural hair color. I've been bleaching/dying my hair for about 10 years and used it as a coping mechanism when things when bad in my life. I really used to think that i would love myself more if i had platinum hair, or black hair, or red hair, and now i realize how silly that was. Self-love can only come from within, not from changing the way you look or from material things. Anyways, I now have about 5 inches of natural color grown out, the natural color that i always thought to be dull and boring and just not good enough. And let me tell you, i am so in LOVE with my natural color now, i can't wait to have it be all natural again. Watching it grow is making me love myself even more (not to sound conceded lol) and taking care of it on a daily basis is something that brings me joy and i look forward to it every day.

*Just wanted to add that i don't think there is anything wrong with coloring your hair for fun or even changing your color to feel "reborn", for me it was just an unhealthy obsession with my outer appearance.

[Gwyned]

I have mental health issues and found that taking care of my hair is a way to practice some amount of self-love. Before, I'd let my hair get damaged and do really nasty things but now I take much better care of it even though there is a lot of room for improvement. I notice that when I start to slip on taking care of my hair, I'm generally in a particularly dark place. I try to keep myself busy. Taking care of my hair has been a practice of learning patience (like someone else mentioned), compassion, and respect for myself. It's one of the reasons why I am going to write out a hair care plan to follow from today to the end of the year.

It's kind of sad, but I also think of my hair as an obvious part of me that is also a metaphor...it flourishes and blooms despite all of the travesty and pain I endure. It embodies what I don't see when I look at myself in the mirror or think of myself in terms of characteristics, values, or traits.

[Dark40]

I have a good connection with my hair and mental health! I also love the topic of hair too! I can talk about hair 24/7. I'm obsessed with it.

[Wendyclaire]

I don’t have any mental health issues and I don’t obsess over my hair. I don’t believe in using a lot of products as I’m a believer in natural beauty. I do dye it once in a while to cover the grey. I don’t fuss and measure it either. Don’t worry about loving yourself, just accept yourself!

[MusicalSpoons]

For me, not really. I don't currently have mental health issues but I do find myself dipping every now and then because no matter how much I try to deny it, my physical health does impact my mental health. I'm housebound 85-90% of the time and am very limited in what I can do at home so it's not like I can do most of the usual self-care suggestions, and while I try not to spend too long in the dips it can be hard. The only real link to my hair is that I am more likely to be dissatisfied with it when I'm in a dip, but conversely I also care enough about it to make sure to detangle often enough even if I'm really struggling physically, and the same with trying to at least wash my scalp often enough to keep it happy. Occasionally it can backfire because if I do a full wash I want to do it all to keep my hair happy - including overnight oiling which then requires a long pre-poo conditioner, and if I don't have the energy then it can make me put it off a bit longer than I should. But overall it can be a good motivation to make me not completely neglect myself even when I'm feeling physically awful, which I guess does help to prevent any downward spirals of the mind.

[Siv]

Well, I do struggle with mental illness, but I don't really have a connection between that and my hair..? I guess it's a good hobby to focus on as a way of recuperating.

[eresh]

Hmmm, I have a few mental disorders.
In the past I used to colour my hair and change up colours when I felt bad or needed a boost.
(teen/twenties years, the impulsive years...)
But now when I'm in a bad period, caring for my hair does not help.
I find it EXTRA HARD to care for myself/my hair in bad periods.
Often the urge to cut it also arises.

So no, having long hair to care for does not make me feel better when I struggle with mental health issues.

[eadwine]

When I am in my down period I don't give a bleep about anything.. so no..

[Dung Beetle]

eresh, I used to cut mine too when I felt bad. It stayed pretty short throughout high school for that reason!

[eresh]

I never actually cut it, except a few cm's. But the urge was hard to resist

[Wendyclaire]

It’s so difficult to even think about hair if I don’t feel good. I hope you’re feeling better soon.

[Liz_H]

My hair makes me happy, especially now that it's such a pretty color and healthy. Unlike the rest of my body, a little effort brings rewards. It's so nice to have control over something! Even when it's dirty, I can put it in a bun, or brush the sebum down to the ends and it looks nice. That's comforting when I'm down.

[embee]

My hair makes me happy, especially now that it's such a pretty color and healthy. Unlike the rest of my body, a little effort brings rewards. It's so nice to have control over something! Even when it's dirty, I can put it in a bun, or brush the sebum down to the ends and it looks nice. That's comforting when I'm down.

Oh yes, this! Sometimes it just really helps to have something personal work ok when one feels surrounded by failures and screw-ups. :)

[lapushka]

Guys... beware it's all in the open on the Mane forum, just FYI. That's why I'm not posting here.

[Kat]

Nope, not at all. I mean, my hair can be another thing to make me feel bad about myself, but that would happen no matter its length. If it wasn't long with the tangles and stringiness and thinning and long "wispies" that pull out and make me look unkempt all the time, it would be short and stringy and flat-looking and scraggly and unable to be pulled back out of my way, and I always hate the ashy color which also looks awful on me.

[GrowingGlory]

It helps me to practice healthy self care. A corrective hair cut earlier this month really gave me a lift. Now it is healthy and easy to wash. It's a modern bob that air dries well. I love my hair again now.

[Hedwig]

I struggle with anxiety and I tend to play with my hair a lot when I'm feeling anxious or uncomfortable. Other than that, I've found that for me, worrying less about my hair and maybe even taking less care of it, is much better for my mental health in terms of self confidence. I used to attach a lot of meaning to my hair and if it happened to like crap, I would be in the worst mood - just because of my hair.

[Natalia_A00]

Sometimes I think that my hair is some kind of "security blanket", that covers me. Like I can hide behind it and I feel better, protected. Sounds weird but makes sense to me. If I cut my hair now, I'd feel exposed and vulnerable.

[luzimerka]

I've had short hair at my lowest moments... I've associated having short hair with depression, betrayal, etc. Looove it on other people, hate it on myself

[Dark40]

My mental health is excellent. I do have some anxiety and depression but I can admit it that I do have an obsession with hair. That's because, I love hair...and I always love talking about hair with others.

[desisparkles]

I noticed that the last big chop I did, hip to pixie was bc of stress that I let affect me. Well a certain person who I seethe was living with me for 3 months. I didn’t notice it until I read about emotional chops on here. I’m in a good place and am determined that even if I’m not, I won’t lose my goals about my hair for a temporary fixable problem. I think I will be able to stick to it now that I’ve become so invested in the care and health of my hair. It’s like the way I treat my loved ones, lots of pampering, thought and consideration.

[poojasilk]

I’ve struggled with my mental health and I think that taking care of myself is something that really helps me with depression. This includes taking care of my hair, eating healthy and exercising. I guess it’s a way of caring about myself even when I’m depressed and don’t care about anything. If I don’t take care of myself I’ll feel even worse about myself. Just trying to get better!