Why is everyone here so humble?

[MamaLou]

Every time people talk about time spend on hair it's like "maybe 5 minutes" or money spend on hair products it is also like "whatever is the most affordable and works". Or why you grow your hair "just for me because i enjoy it, i don't need to show off". You guys are so freaking humble!!

I am not humble. Some days I will spend so much time in front on the mirror styling my hair in some style I saw on youtube/instagram. I will spend so much time in the drug to choose a hair product that smells good and meets all my very specific demands. After finding and using that product my boyfriend has to feel how soft it is and how good it smells (poor guy). When I've finally reached a new length my close friends WILL know about it and I will probably show them how AWESOME my hair looks.

There is nothing wrong with being humble. I am just curious why some of you are so humble. You guys have such beautiful hair and I would honestly be such a show off with hair like that.

[Stray_mind]

Every time people talk about time spend on hair it's like "maybe 5 minutes" or money spend on hair products it is also like "whatever is the most affordable and works". Or why you grow your hair "just for me because i enjoy it, i don't need to show off". You guys are so freaking humble!!

I am not humble. Some days I will spend so much time in front on the mirror styling my hair in some style I saw on youtube/instagram. I will spend so much time in the drug to choose a hair product that smells good and meets all my very specific demands. After finding and using that product my boyfriend has to feel how soft it is and how good it smells (poor guy). When I've finally reached a new length my close friends WILL know about it and I will probably show them how AWESOME my hair looks.

There is nothing wrong with being humble. I am just curious why some of you are so humble. You guys have such beautiful hair and I would honestly be such a show off with hair like that.

Well, to each their own, but i grow my hair for Me and not for attention from others.
And i also hate spending a lot of time on my looks in general. The biggest criteria for my hair for me is for it to he Healthy, and if it requires minimal attention to stay that way, i count myself lucky.

I am not a fan of staying in front of the mirror for hours. I learn updos fairly quickly or maybe it's just that i am teaching myself updos that can be achieved in 5 minutes, hahaha

In general i don't care what others think of my looks. The most important person for me is Me. If i feel comfortable with how i look, then that's all that matters. :)

[guska]

Hmm, I can only speak for myself but, no one cares about my hair. My family doesn't care (as long as I don't buzz it lol), neither do my friends nor strangers that see me on a street. They don't care about how long/shiny/damaged it is. No one in my friend circle is into hair care so I don't bother speaking to them about it. They don't care what washing method I use or what products I use. Or maybe they do care but don't tell their opinion. They're all minding their own business.

I don't know, I've never felt the urge to show off. Of course I like having luscious-looking hair but I honestly don't care if no one notices it. Cause in the end no one does :lol:

Maybe I'm different lol, but I've had long hair my whole life and got into proper hair care really early. I know my hair inside out. I don't want to spend any unnecessary time on my hair, since a day only has 24 hours and there are a lot of things I have to get done in those 24 hours. My hair's not a priority :)

[Begemot]

I can be pretty extra with my hair care (products, methods and such) but I'm less interested in showing off. I'm with guska, I don't think anyone really cares. Only people who compliment my hair are here, lol!

[Kalamazoo]

Fishing for compliments can backfire. Sometimes other people can get their feelings hurt, especially if they're having trouble with hair loss & have just given up. They can take it as me saying, "I'm better than you because I have more hair." And then the tension in the air just thickens to where you could cut it with a knife.

[GoddesJourney]

I can see where you're coming from. I love my hair and (when it is long and healthy) I love to brush it out and look at it. I do miss wearing it dow, but it is really hot and I have a toddler now that would probably mess with it or get juice or milk or food in it. Haha.

On the other hand, I like keeping my figure in shape and I really enjoyed (when I had enough time to keep in such shape) wearing things that showed off my shape or tone. It wasn't even really because I wanted people to look at or bother me really, but I loved to look at it myself and enjoy the level of confidence that gave me. So naturally I didn't understand really what people meant when they talked about "modesty" when it came to apparel. For me, covering up is what I did when I felt insecure about my figure hugging clothes not fitting right if I was feeling bloated or premenstrual. Over time, I realized that some people are much more cautious because unwanted attention makes them really uncomfortable. Others are simply oblivious of that attention. People like me intentionally ignore it unless there is a red flag. I guess we are all just different.

That aside, I think the nice thing about this forum is that we are among friends and can "let our hair down" among others who would actually understand/care about one another's hair interest/obsession. I wonder if supermodels get to relax around other supermodels because they all look amazing and so it's just not a big deal.

Not sure if my meaning made for a good analogy or if it just sounded off topic.

[GoddesJourney]

Fishing for compliments can backfire. Sometimes other people can get their feelings hurt, especially if they're having trouble with hair loss & have just given up. They can take it as me saying, "I'm better than you because I have more hair." And then the tension in the air just thickens to where you could cut it with a knife.

Haha. You may have just taught me what people mean by modesty. Is it a sensitivity to the potential insecurities of others?

[Entangled]

I don’t think we’d have quite the picture-posting culture that we do here at LHC if we didn’t want to show off at least a little.:eyebrows:

The difference is that here people know their pictures will be appreciated by an audience that also likes long hair. Extra-long hair with its taper gets a lot of comments in the real world. Many people genuinely don’t like it, and spare no effort in letting you know how weird it is when you give them an opportunity. Many people try and put you down as super high-maintenance if you want long hair. Other people assume (because of shampoo commercials, YouTube, you name it) that growing long hair MUST take a super fancy serum with gold ions infused with moonbeams or something. The reality is that neither of those things is automatically true. Patience and gentle handling are all you need for most to grow long, though finding the right product and routine can be a rewarding journey.

Also, because long hair can be really straightforward to maintain, you will find more people sporting it who care about simplicity rather than maintaining a trendy, chic bob.

[EdG]

The reason is that everyone's genetics are different. There is no point to discussing genetics because people cannot control their own. We realize that everyone being different is a good thing. :)
Ed

[-Fern]

Growing hair longer than waist length tends to be a practice in patience (and benign neglect, for me), so I think that's a big factor. My attitude towards my hair is pretty much, "Keep calm and bun up." I wear it in a bun 95%+ of the time. People almost never comment on my hair, unless I have it braided--someone occasionally mentions how thick it is.

I rarely do complicated hairstyles, partly because it just doesn't fit "me," and partly because a lot of them involve backcombing or lots of little hair ties that damage hair.

I'm glad you enjoy your hair the way you do!

[elise.autumn]

Every time people talk about time spend on hair it's like "maybe 5 minutes" or money spend on hair products it is also like "whatever is the most affordable and works". Or why you grow your hair "just for me because i enjoy it, i don't need to show off". You guys are so freaking humble!!

I am not humble. Some days I will spend so much time in front on the mirror styling my hair in some style I saw on youtube/instagram. I will spend so much time in the drug to choose a hair product that smells good and meets all my very specific demands. After finding and using that product my boyfriend has to feel how soft it is and how good it smells (poor guy). When I've finally reached a new length my close friends WILL know about it and I will probably show them how AWESOME my hair looks.

There is nothing wrong with being humble. I am just curious why some of you are so humble. You guys have such beautiful hair and I would honestly be such a show off with hair like that.

I understand what you mean, I also like to take pride in my hair and looking nice. However, I also try to be humble and not ask for more attention than I deserve. I consider modesty to be not making so much of yourself as to be distracting in a bad way for other people.

Compliments actually annoy me sometimes, partially because they make me uncomfortable, but also because I'm afraid they will contribute towards vanity. When I was younger, my hair wasn't epicly long, I had acne, and I thought I wasn't pretty. Now that I'm older and people compliment what I look like, I've found my self-identity shifting to put more emphasis on my looks rather than my mind and my identity in God. I am trying to find the balance of looking nice paired with humility and modesty.

[MsPharaohMoan]

Haha, that was a funny OP to read! I used to love styling little intricate braids for special occasions but... then I chopped in side-bangs. Darn, back to pinning those suckers up in thirty seconds and pretending they don't exist. But I know what you mean about spending forever looking for that product that has the best ingredients for your hair. Recently I just HAD to find rose scented shampoo and conditioner, although I did end up finding some at a decent price and on sale, mwa hahaha!

[blackgothicdoll]

Everything already mentioned, plus sometimes it can get unwanted attention, like anything else. I was very happy growing out my hair and getting compliments for awhile, until some rando said I had nice hair, pulled it and grabbed my ass. After that I was over it and keep my hair up. I don't expect a lot of additional rando hair pull/ass grab combos, that guy was just stupid, but it's just an example as to how some people react to long hair - mine not even being long. I imagine it would be much worse if I had butt-length hair, which I'd definitely wear up.

I see it the same way as any features. I like my figure, for example. I won't walk around in a bikini or daisy dukes though. It's something I like without admiration from others, which can often make me uncomfortable. But that's not how everyone works, or you wouldn't have swimsuit models. Neither of them are wrong, and it's definitely not wrong to flaunt what one enjoys - which we all like to do on this forum because it is sort of a safe place to do so.

I think it's sweet and awesome that you love and enjoy your hair. :o

[cjk]

I think we all love compliments, it's nice when a random stranger comes up to us and says something nice.

It's less nice when you had to turn the subject, to fish for that compliment.

Worse, be careful what you wish for. It can turn dark, quickly. I've detailed my own experiences elsewhere, in the more private parts of LHC, but suffice it to say that not all attention is positive or necessarily welcome.

[neko_kawaii]

My hair is just hair. It grows without requiring any specialized treatment. I don't consider my looks an accomplishment because that is just genetics, so what would be the purpose of boasting or vanity? On the other hand, finding a fantastic piece of clothing or mastering a new hairstyle is worth sharing, the first as a piece of luck I'm am delighted with and the second as an accomplishment.

The things I make and do are what matter to me. I can say without modesty that I make the best apple pie you have ever tasted, I like to make things with my hands and show those off regularly, but I don't talk about my academic or professional accomplishments on LHC because that gets into PII territory.

[hennalove]

Every time people talk about time spend on hair it's like "maybe 5 minutes" or money spend on hair products it is also like "whatever is the most affordable and works". Or why you grow your hair "just for me because i enjoy it, i don't need to show off". You guys are so freaking humble!!

I am not humble. Some days I will spend so much time in front on the mirror styling my hair in some style I saw on youtube/instagram. I will spend so much time in the drug to choose a hair product that smells good and meets all my very specific demands. After finding and using that product my boyfriend has to feel how soft it is and how good it smells (poor guy). When I've finally reached a new length my close friends WILL know about it and I will probably show them how AWESOME my hair looks.

There is nothing wrong with being humble. I am just curious why some of you are so humble. You guys have such beautiful hair and I would honestly be such a show off with hair like that.

What a lovely compliment!

Personally, I don't consider myself humble when it comes to my hair. It is what it is and I really don't care what others think. In fact, many don't realize how long my hair is because it is always up. Yet, I too do the youtube styling spells usually finding one or two new styles mainly out of boredom. I love when I master a new bun technique but that's about my extent of showing off my hair. I'm also not a product junkie however, I love to experiment on homemade solutions. Even then, I try to keep it simple. Any product must be organic and I really only use commercial shampoo/conditioner once a month that I order online. Other than that I use herbs. I'm always tweaking to get just that perfect shade using henna and indigo. The most talking I do about my hair is on the forums here. I generally avoid the talking hair among other folk. On a practical basis though, 10 - 15 minutes a day morning and night is about all I need on most days.

[Ylva]

I do put a lot of effort into caring for my hair, but that's because in its current state, it's kind of required. I'd rather not.

I've had some level of long hair most of my life so to me, it's nothing special. It is how I like it, or rather, how I mind it the least and what feels most like me. It all ties into my personality and lifestyle in general. I have gone through periods of wearing very attention-drawing clothes in the past (when I was an 80s rock fan), and I certainly didn't enjoy all the attention I got for it, it was more negative than positive, but I dressed in that style for me. I was bullied pretty severely at school, so that has lead to a certain instinct of not wanting to draw attention to myself and just blend in and become invisible, but now, 9 years since I last saw those people, and after going through some other traumatic events, I'm finally getting to know myself again and enjoying representing my unique personality and history through hair and clothing.

A bit of a ramble, but I guess the moral of the story is the same as for many others: my hair is for me and I don't care about how others feel about it.

[embee]

Maybe it is because many people here have already done what you are now doing? At the beginning many of us measured every month (or week), kept careful track of routines, photos, worried excessively about damage, products, best methods. But after a few years many find a practice that suits. Some good hairtoys, a few good updo styles that are speedy (because time is so valuable), a few good products (preferably cheap) that work for us.

Most people in "the real world" have little interest in my hair - length, health, routine, products, or updo.

[NeonPink]

I do grow my hair for myself but like you I also like to talk about it all the time! It's not necessarily to get compliments, I just enjoy talking about it and I keep my family and closest friends updated on how my hair is doing, and luckily they are all super supportive and don't really care what I do as long as I'm happy :)

[lithostoic]

I'm not humble I just don't give a **** what random strangers think of me.

[S&S]

I guess the same reason most on here wear their hair in buns and in its natural state :confused: - I understand they want protective styles, but they don't show it off! I'd have it out and about all day :wigtongue I love styling and showing off my locks!

I absolutely hate wearing my hair up - not of what others will say, I just don't "feel" good. Its like a superpower for me - more confidence :o

[Ligeia Noire]

Wearing your hair up can be a way of showing it off. Quite awesomely with big hairstyles and exquisite hair accessories...
My routine is pretty simple, not being humble, i just do not do any complicated washings or use much in products. I love showing my hair off while i can. I have a youtube channel where i flaunt it and pinterest and facebook... i take pride in it and love compliments. I do not do any complicated routines, never did. I do like to look in the full size mirror after showering and cover my naked body with all of my hair. It certainly is a hobby and i wouldn't consider myself humble in the slightest.

[Groovy Granny]

I am an older woman with long silver hair....and initially as I grew it out I thought (and said here) that I had to rock it.

Why.... so it would be accepted??
Everyone in my neck of the woods cuts/curls/colors/...I was the odd ball!
As time went on I realized no one cared a bit about my hair, and if anything I would catch odd looks at times....in CHURCH no less :disgust:

It hurt have no compliments, or encouragement outside of LHC, and I got to questioning my motives and how I looked...even thought of cutting it short again ....to fit in. :doh:

But I enjoyed styling my hair....not for hours.... but every day I would practice a bit, and over time I learned a variety of styles as my length allowed,and got a pretty hair toy collection going which again....no one carted a fig about but ME.

And thankfully not too long into my journey I said :wigtongue: to the naysayers!

I grew it out , styled it as I liked and :rockerdud rocked it for ME because it made ME happy and was my personal creative expression.

Nope...not humble...just tired of being dictated to; I am a quiet non-showy person anyway :flower:

It does take less time styling and caring for it than when I had short hair.

I am a frugal retired granny and while I watch my pennies, I do buy nicer things that work for my hair...but I am and never have been extravagant.

We do share pics here as inspiration to others...not to 'show off'......LHC is family to me :heart:

So do it for the right reasons....to avoid the hurt for yourself and possibly others....and enjoy every stage of YOUR journey for YOURSELF :cheer:

[Beeboo123]

I’m not humble, just lazy!

[UncommonTart]

I'm not humble I just don't give a **** what random strangers think of me.


I love this attitude. It took me longer than you to get there, but I finally did and I’m much happier with myself and my appearance now.

I’m not humble. I just don’t care. I grow my hair for me. I have had short hair and I did not care for it. It looks great on other people, but my hair does not play nicely when it’s short. It defies gravity, especially in our local humidity. It just becomes BIG. And at its shortest it was long enough to be hot and uncomfortable in the summer time but too short to pull back and that was miserable. If I ever go short again (unlikely but who can say) it’ll either be a full on pixie cut that I’ll dye fun colors or it’ll be shoulder length minimum, so I can pull it back. But my silvers are coming in and I want to see what I look like with long silver hair, so I’m unlikely to go short anytime soon.

Long, it weighs itself down and is (somewhat) controllable. I like the way it looks and feels down and up, and I love playing with different styles that take a lot of hair, usually from fantasy/sci fi/“historical” movies or tv. ALL the Princess/General Leia hair! All the Game of Thrones hair! All the Vikings hair! There are so many options. And I have a ridiculous collection of hair toys that I love playing with. (It has its own dresser drawer.)

I will admit that I sometimes laugh a little at the reactions when people see my hair down for the first time. I don’t know why, but it’s just kind of funny to me.

[UncommonTart]

Recently I just HAD to find rose scented shampoo and conditioner, although I did end up finding some at a decent price and on sale, mwa hahaha!

Ooh, I’d love to hear more about this rose scented shampoo and conditioner! I love rose scented things! Right now I mostly fragrance my hair via Black Phoenix Alchemy Labs hair glosses (heck, I love them so much I just completely gave up on going ‘cone free), but I’d love to have a rose scented s&c.

[AutobotsAttack]

I feel like everyone here is humble about their hair, because everyone here has, to a degree, an inclination for hair growth, hair preservation, as well as grooming and buying/selling new hair toys.

I find it to be purely a social thing though. We’re all preoccupied to some extent about the same thing: Hair.
Even if it’s at various lengths, textures, and colors.

Even if you were to show off your hair, or be preoccupied with how it looks for the approval of others, it’s still all relative. There’s plenty of people in this world and online who couldn’t care less about hair.

It’s like this other site I’ve been a member of for a while.

It’s a training site, for sports, bodybuilding, powerlifting, strength training, and combat, and not a single one of those people on there would give a hoot about anything involving hair. As they shouldn’t. But at that same token, they too are humble when it comes to sports, physical aesthetics, food/nutrition, etc. Because they’re all interested and preoccupied with the same thing: training and being active.

And they’re all there to share info and learn from one another.

So like I said before, it’s more or less a social thing, that we all just pick up on and run with here, but even more so, this is all relative, and we’re all different.

I personally don’t care to classify myself as humble. I just like anything involving hair.

[akurah]

I'm not sure humble is the right word. I don't like to talk about my hair all that much outside LHC cause it ain't their business. Private would be a better word for my case.

[Liz_H]

I'm fairly new to long hair. I've put in a lot of time learning about products and how to take care of my hair. I'm kind of excited about it, and probably tell my husband more than he wants to know! I'm reaching the point where I'm comfortable with the basics, so focus a bit less on my hair.

I like complements from my friends and family, but am uncomfortable being singled out in a group situation. Probably due to shyness. After 60 years I am getting better at it!

Humility or not, I think it's mostly our basic personalities. My sisters and I are very different in this respect. One will spend an hour on her appearance each morning. That just boggles my mind! She also accomplishes a lot with the rest of her day.

[EdG]

This thread has caused the song It's Hard to be Humble (When You're Perfect in Every Way) (https://www.lyricsfreak.com/m/mac+davis/its+hard+to+be+humble_20315919.html) to be stuck in my head. :cheese:
Ed

[MamaLou]

Thank you for all the responses!! It's very interesting to me to read all of your ideas about this :)

[MamaLou]

This thread has caused the song It's Hard to be Humble (When You're Perfect in Every Way) (https://www.lyricsfreak.com/m/mac+davis/its+hard+to+be+humble_20315919.html) to be stuck in my head. :cheese:
Ed

amazing :applause

[Lady Stardust]

This thread has caused the song It's Hard to be Humble (When You're Perfect in Every Way) (https://www.lyricsfreak.com/m/mac+davis/its+hard+to+be+humble_20315919.html) to be stuck in my head. :cheese:
Ed

Oh thank you now it’ll be stuck in mine too :)

[Milkchocolate]

As a child I was always taught to always be humble because you never know when anything could be taken away :) and in this case..hair lol. Besides that, I realize that hair can be a sensitive topic for many people who are unable to grow. Sometimes it could be a health thing too. I have family members that have trouble growing, or thinning a bit..so for that reason I keep everything 100% to myself as to not trigger anyone... I always wait until someone strikes up a chat first :)

[lapushka]

Every time people talk about time spend on hair it's like "maybe 5 minutes" or money spend on hair products it is also like "whatever is the most affordable and works". Or why you grow your hair "just for me because i enjoy it, i don't need to show off". You guys are so freaking humble!!

I am not humble. Some days I will spend so much time in front on the mirror styling my hair in some style I saw on youtube/instagram. I will spend so much time in the drug to choose a hair product that smells good and meets all my very specific demands. After finding and using that product my boyfriend has to feel how soft it is and how good it smells (poor guy). When I've finally reached a new length my close friends WILL know about it and I will probably show them how AWESOME my hair looks.

There is nothing wrong with being humble. I am just curious why some of you are so humble. You guys have such beautiful hair and I would honestly be such a show off with hair like that.

Well, after all it's just hair... ;)

No, seriously. When I first got here I was picky and experimented a lot (I didn't have a blog back then but wow that would have been something). Now I just annotate my weekly washes, to see what I use (up) and how much hair I lose. Which is important to me, as I went through puberty balding (hormones), and am nearing menopause.

But now that I have reached my goal length and am maintaining mostly, I just... I don't know. I am also using a lot of products up and don't mind what I use on my hair that much TBH.

I used to be very different, but once you settle into sort of a routine, it gets "normal", I guess. :shrug: :)

[Natalia_A00]

I guess I'm not humble either. I love the compliments and attention I receive for my hair, and maybe that's one of the reasons I like it long (that and because I feel prettier and more femenine):
However, in my case I only spend 5 minutes on my hair everyday because I'm lazy :p I don't have the time nor the energy to do intrincated updos or style my hair with tons of products. I just brush it and off I go.
But sometimes I do spend some money on hair products because they make me happy, but if I can find something better for a more affordable price... Why not?

[LadyG]

I grow my hair for my own satisfaction, not others. I wear it up when I go out, and this it to protect myself from others. I work in a large hospital, and am one of the oldest nurses there who works daily caring for patients. The young female staff members are not kindly minded to me having long hair. When they find out how long my hair is, they try to convince me to cut it all off and donate it. It's hurtful and cruel for them to assume that since I am "older with grey/white" hair I should have short hair. I no longer discuss my hair with anyone outside of LHC.

[Hedvig]

Regarding all of the "I'm not humble" comments: somebody who is truly humble isn't going to claim that title, generally, because they don't think they're doing anything special. There is a quote that goes something like "A humble person doesn't think less of themselves, they don't think of themselves at all." They're busy thinking of other people.

I am still in the new stages of purposefully growing out my hair. When I try a new hair style I feel proud of myself, and I ask my husband and daughter what they think. But they're generally pretty "meh" and don't care.

I try to be humble, because I've learned that I am not as special as I thought I was when I was younger, and that how I treat people is what they will remember about me more than my looks or wit. I embaress myself less, and help people more this way. ;-) It's a work in progress.

The people on the board are humble in the way that those with the longest hair are not lording it over those whose hair is shorter, people growing out pixies aren't looked down upon, there isn't any kind of hierarchy based on who can afford the swankiest hair toys, nobody sneers at the noobs asking their dumb questions, etc. We're just all trying to helpful. And so yes, you (general you) are humble. Own it. It's what make this place nice.

[Groovy Granny]

This thread has caused the song It's Hard to be Humble (When You're Perfect in Every Way) (https://www.lyricsfreak.com/m/mac+davis/its+hard+to+be+humble_20315919.html) to be stuck in my head. :cheese:
Ed

LOL I haven't heard that in a long time....love it :lol:

[Chromis]

I'm not actually humble at all really. I think my hair is pretty awesome! That said, I do have a pretty short and simple routine and I don't really spend a ton of time on it. I don't need to. Sure, I experimented too when I first got here, but after a while I figured out what works for me and I am very happy with that.

I do think a large part of the so-called "humbleness" you are seeing is just cultural. We do skew heavy towards persons brought up as females here and towards Americans and that is a culture in general when females are often taught to be modest and self-effacing and not to draw a lot of attention to themselves, particularly in older generations. (You see this in the workforce a ton: "Wow, you did a great job on that big presentation!" and the person goes, "Oh, but I couldn't have done it without Martha/Bob/ my team" instead of just accepting the compliment.)

[MoonRabbit]

I grow my hair for my own satisfaction but that doesnt mean I do not enjoy the shock factor it can cause and compliments from strangers, LHCers, and those around me.

Weird thing is, I could give two hoots if someone complimented my looks or body. Even though I do my best to take care of it. But there's some unconditional pride in my hair. Does that make me less humble? I dont believe so, as I am not out fishing for attention. I suppose I envy those that come up to me to say something nice because as much as i want to do it I'm far too shy.

[MusicalSpoons]

Prior to finding LHC, I always had long hair (hip-TBL) and it wasn't in especially good condition, it just ... grew. People complimented me still, and in fact someone I saw recently for the first time since well before LHC described me as 'with the amazingly long hair' and asked if it was still long; I didn't tell her how long it is now though. But my point is, people thought it was pretty then and I really honestly did nothing special for it whatsoever, other than not cutting it very often.

Now I have put some effort into finding a routine that works well but nobody cares about that, and the most fundamental change to get it past TBL was to put it up with sticks and forks - and honestly, nobody really cares about that either unless they themselves have a genuine interest in growing their own hair.

I also try to be modest and moderate in habits, and hair is a bigger part of my life now then before due to certain circumstances (i.e., my life and my world shrank! So relatively, my hair takes up more of it) but ultimately it isn't a special talent or skill that I've practised and the fact it can grow this long with proper care is really no reflection on me, it's just the way my genetics worked out. In my life I try not to draw undue attention to myself, although here any attention is not undue because long hair is the purpose of this forum and we're all sharing.

When I was younger I did feel pride in some of my intellectual attributes, and was always a bit competitive with the other few at the top of my class, and never tended towards physical vanity because I've always been quite plain and not very attractive. As I've matured I've learned that intellect can also disappear like physical qualities, and as a Christian I've learned that what matters is the inner person, so I'm working on that. I guess in a way caring for very long hair reflects qualities like patience and maybe self-control (although tempting hairtoys test that :oops:) but it's still not some I wish to flaunt. [Well, I don't wish to flaunt anything, though I think that has always been somewhat a part of my personality - which I didn't choose or decide - even before I actively starting trying to become more Christlike.]

Edit: I don't mind compliments though, and there is some enjoyment in surprising people who haven't seen my hair for a little while - *if* it's in a situation such as genuinely needing to rebun, or wearing a ponytail or plait but not with the intention of showing off and not in a way that could be misconstrued as such. I don't know if that makes any sense at all! :shrug:

[spidermom]

I don't know about being humble. For me, it's more a matter of I just don't care, pretty much, although I like a sincere compliment as much as the next person. I got one on a dress I wore a couple of days ago and am still glowing from it. haha However, if someone says something like "your hair is too long," my reaction is likely to be "well, that's - like - your opinion, man" (the Dude style).

[MusicalSpoons]

I don't know about being humble. For me, it's more a matter of I just don't care, pretty much, although I like a sincere compliment as much as the next person. I got one on a dress I wore a couple of days ago and am still glowing from it. haha However, if someone says something like "your hair is too long," my reaction is likely to be "well, that's - like - your opinion, man" (the Dude style).

My reaction to reading that was that I'd be tempted to reply something like "just as well you're not the one wearing it / it's on my head and not yours, then :grin:"

[martyna_22]

I'm not humble. I wear my hair down most of the time, it is for me, not the other way around, I have turned into my thing, you know, I'm the girl with the long, red hair. And I really like the looks of it!
I feel really nice when somebody says something positive about my hair. It really builds up my confidence. I like to pamper my hair as long as I can afford it ;)

[yulia396]

I think being humble is very good. Consider this: humility and hair might be connected. Hair means patience, dedication, love for the self - but a nourishing kinda love, not a selfish one. A selfish kind of love I believe would rather make you buy some extensions (in order to show off for the moment) than grow out hair for good years. I am not saying this is a rule, but in my case it's true. I decided to grow out my hair not just for the sake of beauty but also the process - it's like meditation, sticking to a goal which seems far, but doing it consistently. It's an exercise of patience, you're stretching your whole existence with this. Maybe more LHC-ers can relate to this. But I definitely think of it more as a self love practice than vanity. Of course I love it when others admire it, but vanity is something different. Vanity means you think you're better than everybody else just because of your looks or whatever. I think hair's quite spiritual, and that's probably the reason why this community is so lovely. Everyone seems peaceful and sweet, the people on here are so inspiring, definitely an internet Heaven for me. But yes, I believe hair is a very spiritual thing and I could go very deep into that but I don't think it's the case now hahah! I also think everyone should practice a little bit of humility, not needing to show off is the sign that you're at peace with yourself. You do it for yourself, not others - that's just how life is best to be lived :) this doesn't mean not wearing it down or loving it, it means not letting it get to your head. Girls who let beauty get to their heads usually lose their spark and that's very superficial and foolish. I think beauty has its own levels of depth, it all depends on what you see in beauty. It is just like art. If you are vain, beauty has a different contribution to your life. If you are humble, you might use it as a tool to inspire others, connect, help the world and do good in general. Being humble is more like a character thing, doesn't have to do a thing with your hair.

[bokeh]

But I definitely think of it more as a self love practice than vanity.
This is why I grow my hair long! Proud to be humble, lol.

[Liz_H]

LadyG This is horrible. I'd be tempted to answer with "I've had my hair long since before you were born. Why on earth should I change it now just because you're temporarily young."


... I work in a large hospital, and am one of the oldest nurses there who works daily caring for patients. The young female staff members are not kindly minded to me having long hair. When they find out how long my hair is, they try to convince me to cut it all off and donate it. It's hurtful and cruel for them to assume that since I am "older with grey/white" hair I should have short hair. I no longer discuss my hair with anyone outside of LHC.

yulia396, you said this so well, that I couldn't clip just a few lines to show here. I hadn't quite put it into words, but growing my hair really is self love for me. It does involve patience, but the effort over a year is minimal for the lovely results.

Right now, I don't have a sense of accomplishment about very much. Seeing the growth and increasing health in my hair gives me that. 😁 🤗


I think being humble is very good. Consider this: humility and hair might be connected. Hair means patience, dedication, love for the self - but a nourishing kinda love, not a selfish one. A selfish kind of love I believe would rather make you buy some extensions (in order to show off for the moment) than grow out hair for good years. I am not saying this is a rule, but in my case it's true. I decided to grow out my hair not just for the sake of beauty but also the process - it's like meditation, sticking to a goal which seems far, but doing it consistently. It's an exercise of patience, you're stretching your whole existence with this. Maybe more LHC-ers can relate to this. But I definitely think of it more as a self love practice than vanity. Of course I love it when others admire it, but vanity is something different. Vanity means you think you're better than everybody else just because of your looks or whatever. I think hair's quite spiritual, and that's probably the reason why this community is so lovely. Everyone seems peaceful and sweet, the people on here are so inspiring, definitely an internet Heaven for me. But yes, I believe hair is a very spiritual thing and I could go very deep into that but I don't think it's the case now hahah! I also think everyone should practice a little bit of humility, not needing to show off is the sign that you're at peace with yourself. You do it for yourself, not others - that's just how life is best to be lived :) this doesn't mean not wearing it down or loving it, it means not letting it get to your head. Girls who let beauty get to their heads usually lose their spark and that's very superficial and foolish. I think beauty has its own levels of depth, it all depends on what you see in beauty. It is just like art. If you are vain, beauty has a different contribution to your life. If you are humble, you might use it as a tool to inspire others, connect, help the world and do good in general. Being humble is more like a character thing, doesn't have to do a thing with your hair.

[g_lou]

I think most of us joined the LHC because we wanted to improve our hair in some way but instead were just taught how to love it by everyone else here. It turns out it doesn't need to be longer/shinier/curlier/softer - just more loved and that's something you can't compare to others. It would seem silly to show off when everyone has such amazing hair. I love that everyone has named a different reason for putting more thought into their hair care, just like everyone has a favourite thing about their hair.

Personally I don't talk about my hair in real life very often because I don't want to bore anyone who's just not interested, that's why I'm so glad to find people that are. It is nice to get compliments when you post a picture but mostly it says "there are actual real life people just as passionate about obscure hair things as you!". And it also taught me a lot about not being embarrassed to compliment others.

Don't get me wrong I spend so many hours playing with my hair it's practically a form of mindfulness meditation (I'm slowly working my way through the vikings hairstyles too UncommonTart!). And if I've tried something new my best friend will absolutely be encouraged to feel how soft it is but that will definitely be followed by 20 minutes of borderline poetry on all the lovely things about the back of strangers' heads (martyna_22's gorgeous colour for example!) :).

P.S. LadyG I'm 99% sure they couldn't possibly think so and that's just what they've been taught all their lives, but I guarantee you'll inspire or give confidence to at least on of them that they can break all the supposed hair rules!