I hate my hair.

[catoala]

Seriously. It's like a mix of straight and wavy. If I don't brush it, it's tangly dry mess. If I do, it's tangled again in two minutes. My hair isn't damaged. I just don't get it. I don't onow what to do.

I tried CO washing, terrible so don't recommend it. Comb in shower, out of shower, wet, dry, all absolutely and I always get same results.

[Stray_mind]

Seriously. It's like a mix of straight and wavy. If I don't brush it, it's tangly dry mess. If I do, it's tangled again in two minutes. My hair isn't damaged. I just don't get it. I don't onow what to do.

I tried CO washing, terrible so don't recommend it. Comb in shower, out of shower, wet, dry, all absolutely and I always get same results.

How about using a detangling sprays or leave in conditioners? Have you tried it?

[catoala]

Yes... always the same. It turns into puffy mess and bye bye silky hair.

[cjk]

Sounds like curly hair. Step away from the brush!

You tried cowashing. Once? Or over an extended time? And did you do a final stripping wash first, so the products could penetrate the shaft?

[catoala]

I tried it for about a month. And my hair is naturally oily which made it even more gross in that one month..

I did! but nothing helped. Like cursed hair

[dancedance]

Have you tried the curly girl method? You can use a low poo product instead of a co wash, or just use sulfate shampoo but adhere to the rest of the process.

[catoala]

Have you tried the curly girl method? You can use a low poo product instead of a co wash, or just use sulfate shampoo but adhere to the rest of the process.

I also used that type of a shampoo, but my hair is oily as I said.. so it didn't really go well. But I use a sulfate shampoo yes and a basic cond.

But I'm thinking: would it be possible to have some decent waves (messy so to speak but not super defined) by using that normal routine (basic conditoner, no silicones or anything, sulpate shampoo) and no brushing (excluding in shower only..)

[Stray_mind]

Maybe if you type your hair it would become easier to pick a routin that suits your texture :)

[spidermom]

O.k. If you can't change your hair, you will have to change your attitude about it. I recommend washing with whatever works best for your scalp, rinsing, then combing conditioner through from ears down with a shower comb or your fingers, rinsing, and allowing to air dry without doing anything else, being careful to not do things that are going to tangle your hair (i.e., sit still at the computer or TV rather than moving around a lot). This will show you your hair's natural texture. Once you know that, you can learn how to work with it.

[harpgal]

....But I'm thinking: would it be possible to have some decent waves (messy so to speak but not super defined) by using that normal routine (basic conditoner, no silicones or anything, sulpate shampoo) and no brushing (excluding in shower only..)?
Yes, I think this might work. At least it is worth a try. With patience, you will find a way. With your texture, be careful with a brush.

[MusicalSpoons]

I'd recommend more conditioner, more moisture (and maybe a little protein if your hair likes it). Double conditioning is easy enough to try consistently, no messing about with trying to find the right products for leave-ins, just use your normal conditioner twice if your hair already likes it :shrug: you can try CWC or WCC and find whether one works better than the other; I alternated for a few weeks and found one gave me better results than the other. Or try leaving conditioner on for a bit longer before finding it off, either while still in the shower/bath or beforehand or even afterwards, again whatever might work best practically for you.

Don't despair! You'll find what's right for your hair if you just keep trying :)

[The-Young-Maid]

Do you use any oil on your hair? Try adding a few drops of whatever oil you have on damp hair after washing. That keeps my ends from getting too dry.

Do your products contain any proteins? Proteins can cause tangling on sensitive hair. Try a different set of protein free products and see if your hair becomes silkier.

Have you ever clarified you hair with a clarifying shampoo? You might have some nasty product build up(and protein build up).

Do you use any silicone leave ins? Adding a silicone leave in aka serum can dramatically reduce tangles. Just don't use too much or your hair could look lanky and oily. Occasional clarifying is recommended.

You can try using your conditioner as a leave in. I dilute mine in a spray bottle and focus on my ends. Or you could just spread a dollop throughout.

I have a feeling that it's mostly your products that are causing issues, not your hair. A basic shampoo/conditioner is more than enough to eliminate most tangles so I don't believe the products are working for you. Please tell us what you're currently using!

Depending on the products I use I can be straight or wavy. If you prefer to have waves try braid waves. Do twin braids at night on mostly dry hair. In the morning you'll have more uniform waves that are... easier on the eyes.

[lapushka]

I also vote for having a hairtyping done!

Let's go from there!

[AutobotsAttack]

If you haven’t posted a picture maybe you should. None of us can really give solid advice without seeing what your hair typically looks like.

[GrowinIt]

I know what you mean. I don't love my hair. I wish I did, but I don't. Try to wear it up all the time (pony/halfup/bun), and only style it when you need to, and don't worry about it too much =).

[LadyTheta]

Yep, I can empathize with those of us in a 'struggle' phase with our hair.
It sounds like your hair is basically quite healthy; just unhappy with its inconsistency in texture perhaps.

My health over the past year & half has changed the texture of my hair, and it's a struggle to try to resolve the issues with all the changes. My hairline around my face was always nicely smooth/'straight'; unfortunately the hair around one side of my forehead is growing in now in tight-tight wave!
(I'm hating it, yes. It's like 'puberty' all over again! Oh my, no!)
Hormonal changes? Likely, yes, but I am decades post-menopausal, so it's not that, I know.

Here's hoping to peace with our hair..

[Dark40]

I agree with cjk. It sounds like you've got curly hair to me. My hair is naturally curly too. I'm type 2c/3a hair. With that type of hair I stay about from brushes. With my hair type I've had to change it's texture so that it can be more manageable. You might have to do that, and maybe you will like your hair more.

[yl]

I also used that type of a shampoo, but my hair is oily as I said.. so it didn't really go well. But I use a sulfate shampoo yes and a basic cond.

But I'm thinking: would it be possible to have some decent waves (messy so to speak but not super defined) by using that normal routine (basic conditoner, no silicones or anything, sulpate shampoo) and no brushing (excluding in shower only..)

Maybe your hair isn't as oily as you think, it could be buildup since you re using a "basic conditioner" it probably has cones in it and a sulfate free shampoo is not enough to wash the silicones out, I have struggled with this in past, just be patient and you'll find the right routine for your hair, best of luck ;)

[CosmoCat]

I hate my hair more often than not...mixed texture AND easily damaged. I wish that I had some advice, but I don’t...just wanted to let you know that you’re not alone. I would trade for non-damaged hair (mine gets white dot breakage), however! Appreciate that aspect, at least.

[catoala]

Maybe your hair isn't as oily as you think, it could be buildup since you re using a "basic conditioner" it probably has cones in it and a sulfate free shampoo is not enough to wash the silicones out, I have struggled with this in past, just be patient and you'll find the right routine for your hair, best of luck ;)

As I wrote... It's a sulfate shampoo and cone free conditoner. So it's not that. I used silicones once: but that's washed off.

[The-Young-Maid]

As I wrote... It's a sulfate shampoo and cone free conditoner. So it's not that. I used silicones once: but that's washed off.

I would definitely try a silicone conditioner. For lots of people cone free just doesn't give your hair any slip and makes it super tangly. Also, your hair being oily/not oily isn't really the problem here?:confused:

[spidermom]

All kinds of products can cause buildup, even oils, even cone-free conditioner. If you haven't, use a clarifying shampoo and follow my earlier instructions for a hair-typing photo. We can help a lot more once we see that.

[Nox_Inber]

Do you have hard water? Water quality can drastically affect your hair and cause mineral build up. My hair gets so heavy, flat and "unclean" feeling without an ACV or CA rinse because I have hard water. Generally speaking, clarifying your hair and removing all product/possible mineral build up will be a good place to start. Figuring out your hair type will hugely help as well. The devil is often in the details with this kind of stuff, so the more details and specifics you can give us the better we can help!