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softheartedandl
May 7th, 2019, 10:22 AM
Any advice on how to get out of a hair care slump? These past few months I've been quite gloomy and haven't really felt up to taking care of myself, my hair especially. I've not been using my boar bristle brush or doing any king of oil treatments and I've been sleeping with my hair loose and wearing it in all kinds of unsafe hairstyles like high ponies just cause they're easy and convenient. I really want to get back into the groove of taking care of my hair but when it comes time to do it I just never feel up for it and feel so lazy. :(

leayellena
May 7th, 2019, 10:33 AM
how long is your hair? a messy bun with claw clips should be the minimum care though. if you don't feel like diy trims or S&D you can go to a hairdresser but don't forget they don't really know something about hair care in general. you can try co-washing if you think wcc is too much of a hassle

-Fern
May 7th, 2019, 10:39 AM
We all go through different seasons in life, and sometimes you just have to spend your limited energy on your priorities. Be kind to yourself and forgive yourself if your hair doesn't beat out other priorities.

I've had major depression for the past year or more, and the biggest things for me are to 1) brush at least once a day to prevent gnarly tangles 2) try to keep my scalp healthy by shampooing at least once a week 3) roll with whatever styles you can manage. Honestly, a ponytail is not the worst thing in the world for your hair (compared to heat styling, for instance), so don't be too hard on yourself. A cinnabun is also pretty easy, so I can usually convince myself to take the extra 30 seconds in exchange for not having my ponytail distracting me the rest of the day. Messy buns are still stylish, so roll with the imperfections, too!

Begemot
May 7th, 2019, 10:48 AM
It's okay if you just don't have the energy/interest to do much right now. Don't force it but take small steps. Is there something you miss about taking care of your hair? Oil treatments, braiding, hair toys... Maybe you can find hair care inspiration online, from here, Youtube or Pinterest etc., or maybe you could try some new product or method.

LadyCelestina
May 7th, 2019, 11:22 AM
That's perfectly fine and normal! I would second switching the pony to at least an elastic held bun though. I use those cable elastics and if they're soft enough, there's no snagging or damage.

Hellebore
May 7th, 2019, 11:38 AM
I second the bun/claw clip suggestion - it's been a timesaver for me and way better than reaching for an elastic.

Aerya
May 7th, 2019, 12:03 PM
Don't beat yourself up over not having energy for a full routine. Sometimes we just need a break, and that's okay. :flower:

I agree about switching to a bun instead of a ponytail. Claw clips, sticks or a soft elastic are all good. I'd oil my ends in between washes too. :)

Wusel
May 7th, 2019, 12:06 PM
I'm often lazy too. Then I do the claw clip messy bun too. And put some oil in overnight. Is fast and easy.

spitfire511
May 7th, 2019, 01:29 PM
agree with the others - and sometimes I can jolt myself out of something like that with something new - go find a new product to try or new hair toy (claw clips are always great!) sometimes if I do that it will prompt me to want to use it and get back in the groove!

Panthera
May 7th, 2019, 02:42 PM
Just take one thing at a time and don't try to do too much. When that one thing feels ok to do, then add another one. For example, decide to use your bristle brush twice this week. Put those brushing days in your calendar or maybe use an app where you can add tasks and reminders. Writing things down and planning ahead can really help and it just feels good to see the things that have been accomplished.

If you were able to do the brushing, brush your hair 4 times next week. If it was ok, you could add something else next week. Maybe decide to do a protective style on Tuesday and Friday. Add those in your calendar and don't forget about the brushing. If it's too much, go back to the first task. You could just brush on certain days for a few weeks as long as you need until it feels comfortable to do. Or if you're feeling better and it's way too easy, add more stuff. Just not too much at once. If you suddenly add 20 thing in your calendar you can get overwhelmed and it's just going to make you feel worse if you can't do everything.

But it's ok if you feel lazy and take a break. Do things you enjoy, if taking care of your hair will make you feel better, do that. Think about what's the most important thing you'd like to do and start with that. If it doesn't give you any kind of enjoyment, don't force yourself. Focus on things that make you happy and don't be too hard on yourself. Talk to someone about how you're feeling. Things will get better at some point. :flower:

MusicalSpoons
May 7th, 2019, 03:12 PM
You've had good suggestions but in going to point out something here - feeling unmotivated, especially if you're feeling down is NOT lazy. You might *feel* like it's laziness but it's not. If you don't have the mental energy for it, that's just as valid as not having the physical energy for it and it's definitely not laziness :flowers: (lazy is a horrible judgment we make about ourselves and it's unhelpful when we're not doing things because we can't.) I hope you're able to start feeling a bit better soon, and take pride in each tiny step accomplished. Any tiny step in taking care of yourself is an achievement :) especially if it's more than you have been doing, but also if it's maintaining the level you have been doing too.

RottenMango
May 7th, 2019, 04:12 PM
Hair care doesn’t have to be super complex. Nothing wrong with being low maintenance if that is easier given your circumstances. A regular wash and condition with a natural oil as a leave in can work perfectly fine. Put extra oil on your ends to protect them and wear loose buns/ponytails/braids to avoid breakage.

lapushka
May 7th, 2019, 04:37 PM
Hair care doesn’t have to be super complex. Nothing wrong with being low maintenance if that is easier given your circumstances. A regular wash and condition with a natural oil as a leave in can work perfectly fine. Put extra oil on your ends to protect them and wear loose buns/ponytails/braids to avoid breakage.

Exactly. When I could go back to washing once a week, I was *so* giddily happy. It was amazing for me.

YvetteVarie
May 8th, 2019, 07:26 AM
Hugs to you. It happened to me when I was pregnant. I was so sick I had no energy for hair care. I went to a hairdresser to get mine done once a month. Just go there for a wash and don't let them pressure you into more

soldierssong
May 8th, 2019, 07:58 AM
There's not else a lot to say that hasn't been said. We've all been in your place. Be kind to yourself. You are not a failure or anything. You're a human. And you're going to be okay. Take small steps, be patient with yourself, and set your eyes on the goal, whatever that may be. Good luck.

EmeraldSkies
May 8th, 2019, 08:41 AM
Some days, i also feel too tired and couldn't find the motivation to do anything. When that happens, i would just stick to a simple routine because it's something i don't have to think about. I would suggest removing any extra steps in your haircare routine and stick to a simple routine (eg shampoo and condition your hair) and simple hairstyles for now. When you are feeling better, go back to your previous routine. Also, take a break from whatever stressing you out and find something enjoyable to do. Hopefully, you will feel better soon!:)