Seeking encouragement

[Eireann]

I am growing my hair out from a short bob. I used to have tailbone length hair then chopped to shoulders, then short bob. I loved it short for a while and now I want my long hair back, like NOW. It's so easy to go from long to short. It's soooooo agonizing to go from short to long! I know I'm making progress (the other day I wore earrings that used to hang below my hair line but now are well concealed), but it's not even to my shoulders yet. Looking at pictures that used to inspire me now makes me feel like I'll never get there. The picture my husband has on his desk is me with waist+ hair. That's how I see myself (and clearly how he sees me!) I don't regret cutting it because it was the right thing to do at the time (my dad died, I had cancer, I had a bad ski accident that laid me up for 3 months.. ..all reasons not to fuss with long hair) but I wish I could just wave a magic wand and get the length back. I've even thought about extensions, but it doesn't suit my nature-mama personality.

Anyway, sorry for rambling. I just thought this was a safe place to share!!

[Lady Stardust]

Hang on in there! Once it gets to shoulder length you’ll be able to put it up and ignore it a bit more, and you’ll be able to try some styles out again.

It’ll be worth the wait.

[spidermom]

Do what you can to have fun with it now because it may never be this length again. I loved to curl my hair (hot rollers) and pin one side back with a fabric flower clip when it was short (for example).

[Begemot]

I'm so sorry about your loss and about all the difficult things happening all at once.

It's so easy to go from long to short and so difficult to go from short to long... exactly, I feel this so much. I thought I just wanted low maintenance hair and that long hair didn't matter much at the time but soon after cutting long hair suddenly started to feel very important LOL. We'll get there eventually :hifive: I just try to think growing long as an exercise in learning patience.

[mica]

Hang in there :flower: like spidermom said, this is a great opportunity to have fun with your hair at it's current length. I too had a big chop, I went from classic to a short bob about a year ago. I recon there's a difference in that I did it purely because I wanted to, and it sounds like you've been going through a lot. I would try not to stress about it, and focus on the pros; short hair can be a lot of fun, and you don't have to worry about damage as much! As for missing your long hair/seeing yourself with long hair, I feel like shoulder length is when "long" hair begins for most people, so maybe those feelings with go away once you get there :)

[AmaryllisRed]

Yes! What spidermom said! When my hair was short, I loved to curl it with rollers overnight or scrunch it with mousse. All things I don't do now that it's long.

[guska]

I know exactly how you feel. I also had TBL hair, for many years, before first chopping it to BSL in May last year and a month later to a neck-length bob. Sometimes when I walk into the bathroom I actually subconsciously expect to see myself with TBL hair. Then I turn the lights on and get back to reality haha. It's a bit sad, but that's how much my long hair was a part of me and my identity.

But I agree with spidermom, do hairstyles that are not possible on longer hair. Double dutch braids are very cute on shorter hair :)

I myself am milking the heck out of this experience because I know my hair might never be this short again in my whole life. And time really does flies by. Your hair will be long again in no time. It's been half a year since my second chop and I am already at almost APL :)

[Sparkles122]

I had hip length hair and chopped it off for donation. I too thought my long hair was not important to me at the time and that I would be better off with “low maintenance” hair. It turns out it meant alot to me and actually my longer hair was lower maintenance than it is now. This was in November. Im BSL right now but I too see myself with my hip length hair. I understand your feelings. The awful thing is, I regretted it the second I did it. But like spidermom said (and she told me this also in one of my previous posts and I remind myself everyday) enjoy it while it lasts because it may never be that length/short again

[Eireann]

Thanks everyone! I'm so touched by all your words of wisdom. I canceled my salon appointment for a "trim" (we know how those can go), and trimmed my own bangs (which really was the only thing I wanted. . .and it doesn't look too bad!) I can do this!! Thank you again!!!

ETA: Jumping off what Spidermom and others are saying about enjoying it while it lasts, I'm feeling a cool rock and roll Patti Smith circa 1974 vibe. Not all bad!

https://i.postimg.cc/FkrwC3sB/fullsizeoutput-2a6.jpg (https://postimg.cc/FkrwC3sB)

[lapushka]

Ramble all you want! :)

A bob is a nice cut to grow out from. So that's something! But... NOW is not gonna happen, no way, no how. :( Sadly. Maybe do it one milestone after another and join the appropriate grow-out threads, set yourself those tiny challenges and it will be long before you know it.

Set realistic goals though, it's not gonna grow to waist within a year for example. :flower:

Good luck on your journey; happy growing! :)

[lunalocks]

Thanks everyone! I'm so touched by all your words of wisdom. I canceled my salon appointment for a "trim" (we know how those can go), and trimmed my own bangs (which really was the only thing I wanted. . .and it doesn't look too bad!) I can do this!! Thank you again!!!

ETA: Jumping off what Spidermom and others are saying about enjoying it while it lasts, I'm feeling a cool rock and roll Patti Smith circa 1974 vibe. Not all bad!

https://i.postimg.cc/FkrwC3sB/fullsizeoutput-2a6.jpg (https://postimg.cc/FkrwC3sB)

Hang in there! It will be longer before you know it! Note that if you have had you hair cut/trimmed at a salon, they usually say come back once for a free fringe trim.

[bokeh]

I understand how frustrating the wait can be too! Enjoy your current length like Spidermom said and find ways to distract yourself as your hair grows. I love the practical attitude of many LHC members and have followed their lead by learning new up-dos as my hair grows and by practicing benign neglect. I try not to think about my length too often so that when I do I'm surprised by my progress. Still...I'm like a child waiting in anticipating for Christmas morning, lol. I hope that 2019 is wonderful year for you in every way!

[MamaLou]

I think the most enjoyable thing is to make your hair look healthy and beautiful, even if it that means getting a haircut sometimes. I really want to have waist length hair (my hair is around bra strap lenght right now) and I was only focused on growing my hair, but I got a hair cut last week and now I'm very happy with my current length! I'm still growing it out but it is making the journey a lot nicer.

Maybe you can also get a few hair toys that work for shorter hair? That can also be fun :)

[gustavonut]

Hey we’re around the same length :) don’t worry about it, find something that makes time go by quicker like video games or a hobby you enjoy. I am really happy with my progress so far even though it’s only an inch. Every inch counts ;)

[spidermom]

Just saw the photo - nice! Enjoy that.

[MarPreciosa]

I think the most enjoyable thing is to make your hair look healthy and beautiful, even if it that means getting a haircut sometimes. I really want to have waist length hair (my hair is around bra strap lenght right now) and I was only focused on growing my hair, but I got a hair cut last week and now I'm very happy with my current length! I'm still growing it out but it is making the journey a lot nicer.

Maybe you can also get a few hair toys that work for shorter hair? That can also be fun :)

Yes - this! Keeping it healthy with nice ends/shape will help you enjoy the stages I bet! Once you reach shoulder you will feel much better. Each milestone win will help you on the journey!

[Reyn127]

Sorry for all the difficulties you’ve been going through. I hope things are looking up for you!

As for your hair, just remember that although it is short currently, it is also actively GROWING every second. You’re getting closer to your goal with no effort, every day, automatically. That’s pretty cool if you ask me! And I think now is the time to practice ALL those hairstyles/braids you couldn’t master before. For me, fancy braids are way easier to learn on shorter hair. Even if it’s not as long as you’d like, your hair is still there, and can still be a source of enjoyment in the meantime.

[Cate36]

I am growing my hair out from a short bob. I used to have tailbone length hair then chopped to shoulders, then short bob. I loved it short for a while and now I want my long hair back, like NOW. It's so easy to go from long to short. It's soooooo agonizing to go from short to long! I know I'm making progress (the other day I wore earrings that used to hang below my hair line but now are well concealed), but it's not even to my shoulders yet. Looking at pictures that used to inspire me now makes me feel like I'll never get there. The picture my husband has on his desk is me with waist+ hair. That's how I see myself (and clearly how he sees me!) I don't regret cutting it because it was the right thing to do at the time (my dad died, I had cancer, I had a bad ski accident that laid me up for 3 months.. ..all reasons not to fuss with long hair) but I wish I could just wave a magic wand and get the length back. I've even thought about extensions, but it doesn't suit my nature-mama personality.

Anyway, sorry for rambling. I just thought this was a safe place to share!!

Go here - https://bondiboost.com.au order their hair growth pack. Start using it.. it works.. look at the reviews if not sure..

Turn upside down each day and massage gently. don't worry about limiting it to 7 days as some say.. no need.... the length of my fringe (where I measure from) since using these products and inverting has grown almost 2 inches in less than 2 months.. so they do work).

Take good hair vitamins and get out in the sun if possible for a walk..

All of that should maximise your growth rate.. and by the end of the year, you'll be well on your way!

[Dark40]

Yes! I agree with spidermom too! Hang in there! I remember when I first joined here at the LHC I started out with a short chin length bob. I hated it at first. Because, it stayed at that length for many years. My hair acted like it didn't want to grow any longer. Beforehand, I had BSL hair, and I had chopped it all off into a chin length bob, and now my hair is waist+ length! It's the longest it has ever been in my whole entire life. Don't worry, your hair will grow back to being TBL again. Like what lapushka said, take it one milestone at a time. Join the different growth threads, and have lots of fun wearing different styles.

[Lady Stardust]

Go here - https://bondiboost.com.au order their hair growth pack. Start using it.. it works.. look at the reviews if not sure..

Turn upside down each day and massage gently. don't worry about limiting it to 7 days as some say.. no need.... the length of my fringe (where I measure from) since using these products and inverting has grown almost 2 inches in less than 2 months.. so they do work).

Take good hair vitamins and get out in the sun if possible for a walk..

All of that should maximise your growth rate.. and by the end of the year, you'll be well on your way!

Cate36 I noticed on your recent thread that you are concerned about shedding - the products you have linked have oils in them, and although it isn’t the case for everyone, some people suffer from shedding when they put oils on their scalp.

Also, a note about the inversion method - it isn’t recommended for everyone, for example during pregnancy or for those who suffer from migraines, and people with certain health conditions. If anyone is considering this method it’s worth reading into the pros and cons first. There is a thread on the forum somewhere.

Personally I find it too stressful to monitor every bit of growth. Getting to a length where it’s long enough to put up is a big help, and I agree with the suggestions to try different styles. It’s a long journey so might as well enjoy it!

[Milkchocolate]

I understand your frustration but just know that you’re simply going through the steps right now! I was also in your shoes in the past. In the meanwhile, just make it a fun hobby out of learning tips, recipes, new products and trying out new methods for growing out your hair. Just know that you will get there and it just takes some time! Being on this forum definitely makes growing more enjoyable, seeing as there are others trying to do the exact same thing :) happy growing! Don’t forget to document your journey along with all of us on lhc :)

[aethyra]

Thanks everyone! I'm so touched by all your words of wisdom. I canceled my salon appointment for a "trim" (we know how those can go), and trimmed my own bangs (which really was the only thing I wanted. . .and it doesn't look too bad!) I can do this!! Thank you again!!!

ETA: Jumping off what Spidermom and others are saying about enjoying it while it lasts, I'm feeling a cool rock and roll Patti Smith circa 1974 vibe. Not all bad!

https://i.postimg.cc/FkrwC3sB/fullsizeoutput-2a6.jpg (https://postimg.cc/FkrwC3sB)

Patti Smith!! yeah!!! I had some additional suggestions if you want to make a huge impact while you hair is still at this shorter length. My suggestions are based on the idea that just because you hair is currently shorter than you would like, this does not mean that you have to channel a more masculine personna aka Patti. You could go total femme. Lots of eye makeup, dresses, heels and stockings, perfume and feminine hair accessories. I am not sure if this suggestion works for you as far s who you are as a person, but getting lots of second looks and additional attention will certainly lift you up in this time when you want to feel encouragement as a woman.