PDA

View Full Version : Kid's Hair Care



Jesmonster2
November 4th, 2018, 03:14 AM
Hello! I wonder if those of you who are parents take care of your kids' hair similarly to how you care for your hair. I have a two year old girl. Since I have started learning more about being gentle with my hair here, I have started doing some of this with my daughter's hair too. Of course I have to work around whether or not she decides to let me touch her hair, but I try now to put her hair in braids or buns and I wash it less often. She produces no sebum yet, so I only wash when she gets something in it. Does anyone else do this? Do any of you have some good little kid hair tips? Do you have favorite products for your kids 'hair?

MamaLou
November 4th, 2018, 03:38 AM
I have no experience with this at all, but if she doesn't always like it when you touch her hair very often you can maybe make cute double dutch braids and leave those in for a few days? I remember from being little that my mum always used shampoo that did not hurt my eyes and she used detangle spray when brushing my hair because otherwise I would not cooperate. I think at this point it is most important to make hair care a good experience for your child and for you. Maybe she can chose for example which hair clips she likes?

It's great you want to take care of your child's hair from a young age. If I will ever have children I want to do the same :)

Jesmonster2
November 4th, 2018, 04:49 AM
I have no experience with this at all, but if she doesn't always like it when you touch her hair very often you can maybe make cute double dutch braids and leave those in for a few days? I remember from being little that my mum always used shampoo that did not hurt my eyes and she used detangle spray when brushing my hair because otherwise I would not cooperate. I think at this point it is most important to make hair care a good experience for your child and for you. Maybe she can chose for example which hair clips she likes?

It's great you want to take care of your child's hair from a young age. If I will ever have children I want to do the same :)

I love braiding her hair, but it doesn't stay in for too long. She takes a nap every day and plays outside a lot, so the braids come out. Her hair is a little longer than shoulder length on her now. Some days she doesn't have the patience to let me do her hair, but I at least comb it out gently and put a clip in it to keep it out of her eyes.

Joules
November 4th, 2018, 05:17 AM
If I ever have a daughter, I'll keep her hair short (in a cute bob or something like that) until she's old enough to take care of it herself. You just can't know for sure whether an updo is ok or too tight for her, and traction alopecia is surprisingly common among little girls. Their hair follicles aren't as strong as those of adults, and pulling from buns and braids is damaging to them. I personally didn't care about what length my hair was until I turned 11, so I'm grateful my mom kept it short and let it do its thing. I mean, I did admire long hair when I was little, but I wasn't obsessing over it and I was ok with short haircuts.

Angelica
November 4th, 2018, 05:44 AM
I always wanted long hair even as a little girl. I used to have ponytails with bobbles! lol! Not very kind to the hair but it was the "in" thing then. My son's hair was long as a little boy and I found using a detangler shampoo beneficial because he has a sensitive scalp. It sounds as if your daughter has lovely hair already. My mother never had the patience really, but despite this I did have long hair as kid. Another favourite style back in my day was the pageboy. It was cute but never really suited me.

ArabellaRose
November 4th, 2018, 06:34 AM
I have a 6 year old boy with short hair so there's not much for me to do with his. I use a 2 in 1 shampoo and conditioner despite the short length and regular cuts and he's of the age where he likes having it styled for school so I make sure to clean all the product out of it.

AmaryllisRed
November 4th, 2018, 07:06 AM
Yep, I have daughters who are four and two.
I only shampoo when it's dirty and use lots of conditioner on both of them.
My older daughter wears her hair down a lot and her hair is so silky and fine that styles usually fall out before long. I do try to use the soft hair ties more than the tiny colored elastics that always pull out hair when I take them out. Also I have an ouchless brush for her that is basically magic.
The younger one just barely has enough for a ponytail so styling isn't much of an issue yet. She's a curly, though. So I spray her down with a water and conditioner mixture daily. She used to hate it but she's gotten used to it. I don't brush her hair, dry it with a t-shirt after her bath, standard curly hair stuff.

WyntreBlossom
November 4th, 2018, 01:22 PM
I don't have kids, but I have a sister, and two very little nieces. (7 and 5). They are mixed and have gorgeous curls associated with their fathers hair and, but their hair is very thin/fine like their mothers. Their mother doesn't cut their hair regularly, as she believes is their choice on if they want it cut or not, which I respect. 7 year old is probably MBL /Waist when it is wet/straight and the 5 year old is probably around Shoulder or slightly longer.

Every time we try to give them braids/ponytail/etc they just don't want anything to do with it. They say it hurts/takes too long/etc.

A trick we use is we let them choose what style they want among several styles, and choose the clip or band that will be going into their hair. Then we put on their favorite tv snow, give them a little snack (like some gummies) and sit them down and let them watch tv while we style their hair. Doing this has let me personally get away with a dutch braid on the oldest, and my grandma can get away with nice bun on the youngest. Their mother can also get away with straightening their hair doing this trick as well (though I have advised her against straightening it with them so little.)

It works on most non tantrum days. Hope it helps <3

LittleHealthy
November 4th, 2018, 01:42 PM
Yes! I have a daughter who just turned 4. I’m a big believer in allowing her to dress how she likes and have her hair how she likes. Therefore she has never had a haircut in her life (literally), and wears a Tangled Rapunzel dress most days haha!
My daughter’s hair is almost down to her hips when wet and straight, but it has a bit of waviness to it. I have no experience with waves myself but have considered researching curly-girl friendly methods as herxhair quite often just looks ‘boofy’. My daughter hates having her hair up, so I usually oil her ends and let it stay loose.
I definitely treat my daughter’s hair with the same amount of care and thought as my own.
My only wish is to trim my daughter’s hair just once, so that it is all the one length!

https://i.postimg.cc/Jzr6Wyxv/450-A0-F86-CA98-4-C7-B-A632-0-B6-B12-AAAB01.jpg

ravenskey
November 4th, 2018, 05:16 PM
Never had a child myself.

BUT as someone who had long (hip length) hair from about 4-10, I can offer some tips that would have made dealing with my hair way easier.
1. A Tangle Teezer, Wet Brush, Wide Tooth Comb - anyone of these is better than a brush with THE BOBBLES on the tips.
2. Detangling spray as a double measure - particularly after washing or if you're in a rush.
3. Always detangle before washing - my parents did not do this and it was hell.
4. When washing don't pile hair up onto head - this makes tangles = pain.
5. Same when drying - tangles - see above.
6. Keeping hair up does minimise tangles which is good but seeing what some people have said before - maybe keep plaits/buns lose for now and when she's older see how it goes.

A lot of this you may know already I'm just listing a few things that MY parents could have learnt when I was little :lol: It may seem tangle focused but that's because when I was little the pain of my hair being brushed was THE WORST THING EVER. I would do almost anything to avoid that brush if you can believe it. I loved my long hair then...I would have loved it more if I and my parents had known how to handle it better.

Hope this helps :)

Ylva
November 4th, 2018, 05:21 PM
I don't have kids, but I personally had long hair as a kid, something between BCL and classic. It was mostly in a braid. I haven't got the slightest clue about what products my mom used, but based on her hair knowledge, my best guess would be some regular market shampoo and no conditioner what so ever. Occasionally a detangling spray was used. My hair was very healthy.

SwanFeathers
November 4th, 2018, 06:02 PM
If I ever have a daughter, I'll keep her hair short (in a cute bob or something like that) until she's old enough to take care of it herself. You just can't know for sure whether an updo is ok or too tight for her, and traction alopecia is surprisingly common among little girls. Their hair follicles aren't as strong as those of adults, and pulling from buns and braids is damaging to them. I personally didn't care about what length my hair was until I turned 11, so I'm grateful my mom kept it short and let it do its thing. I mean, I did admire long hair when I was little, but I wasn't obsessing over it and I was ok with short haircuts.

Oh gosh no! My mother had three daughters and chopped off all of our hair for years into those abominable bob/page boy hack jobs. We hated her for it for years, and I admit I still have some resentment towards her as an adult because of this. It was just another way to keep us from building any self worth. There are plenty of cultures that allow their childrens hair to grow, there is no need for us to shear them like sheep. No offense to anyone who's kid actually prefers short hair of their own volition.

shaluwm_agape
November 4th, 2018, 07:13 PM
MamaLou does your daughter like hats?

LittleHealthy
November 4th, 2018, 11:17 PM
Oh YES I have a tangle teaser dupe with a mermaid on the back of it. This brush has improved our haircare routine tenfold!! Kids get some seriously knotty hair at times (cos, yaknnow, it’s kids) and that’s by far the hardest part to manage!!

LittleHealthy
November 4th, 2018, 11:21 PM
Oh gosh no! My mother had three daughters and chopped off all of our hair for years into those abominable bob/page boy hack jobs. We hated her for it for years, and I admit I still have some resentment towards her as an adult because of this. It was just another way to keep us from building any self worth. There are plenty of cultures that allow their childrens hair to grow, there is no need for us to shear them like sheep. No offense to anyone who's kid actually prefers short hair of their own volition.

I agree. I’m all for children having the choice. They’re their own person. I think we learn a lot by being given the freedom o choose sometimes as children. Hair is a pretty inconsequential thing to be able to have control over as a kid. Learning about patience, consequences of chopping off long hair (having to wait for it to grow again) etc! Not that it’s really on-topic.
I certainly have days where I wish I could chop my daughter’s hair off :lol:

Joules
November 5th, 2018, 02:01 AM
Oh gosh no! My mother had three daughters and chopped off all of our hair for years into those abominable bob/page boy hack jobs. We hated her for it for years, and I admit I still have some resentment towards her as an adult because of this. It was just another way to keep us from building any self worth. There are plenty of cultures that allow their childrens hair to grow, there is no need for us to shear them like sheep. No offense to anyone who's kid actually prefers short hair of their own volition.

Well, there's a difference between shearing kids like sheep and preventing them from building self-worth and actually caring about them. After all, hair is just hair, and I'm sure there were other more important things your mother did that damaged your self-esteem. I wrote about traction alopecia that a lot of caring moms give their daughters. I remember whenever I had long-ish hair and a teacher in my kindergarten French-braided it, I had crazy headaches afterwards (and all girls had their hair re-done after naps in kindergarten, so there was no way of avoiding it other than having your hair cut). If I'd spent all of my childhood with those hairstyles, I wouldn't have the thickness I have now. Besides, I said "till she can take care of it by herself" - I started washing my hair around the age of 7 or 8, since then my hair was my business and I was free to grow it as long as I wanted. The lesson I learned from it was quite simple: if you want something, then do it yourself. Having my own freedom with my hair and not relying on anyone else helped me stay independent in that area: I learned to do intricate braids myself at an early age, I started self-trimming quite early too, I never wanted to dye my hair and never relied on hairdressers to make myself feel pretty.

ArabellaRose
November 5th, 2018, 06:54 AM
My mum would regularly let us grow our hair long and then take us to the salon to get it cut at a hideous shoulder length bob, not out of malice, I don't think it was even to make things easier for every one (hair brushing was hellish for all of us), I think it was literally just her poor sense of taste. She had the same style herself.

Now, my friend. She went home from school with headlice when she was 9 and her mum shaved her entire hair off, her gorgeous, waist length, chestnut, loosely curly hair off. My friend was psychologically damaged from that for years and had massive trust issues about her hair. I was the first person she let cut her hair after that, and that was about a decade later.

I hold no resentment towards my mum for our hideous hair, I have beautiful hair now and she forbids me to cut it.

spitfire511
November 5th, 2018, 11:19 AM
So I have an 11 YO DD who has waist length hair now. She has always had long hair - recently cut back to about MBL and added layers for just a little something different.

We've spent a long time working to make sure she knows how best to take care of it - years of braiding almost every day :D She's very active and, when small, had fine hair (which did get easier as she grew older) so keeping it from being a rat's nest was a challenge but worth it.

She toys around with the idea now of chopping back to bob but never seems to follow through when I take her to the stylist. :D

I will say that I was not allowed to have long hair at all until I was in about 4th grade. Neither were my siblings. And we all wound up growing our hair longer when we were older (one has gone back to a bob because she feels it's easy for her professionally).

I don't know if my mom's rules hurt or helped - we all wished that we'd been allowed long hair - but we all also firmly believe it's *just* hair - mine's been all sorts of colors in the past and just about every length and style from my earlobes down (never did get as short as a pixie). Then again - my daughter pretty much feels the same way and didn't bat an eye when we chopped 8 inches off in the spring. She was happy and loved how her hair felt and makes choices based on what she likes vs what anyone (including her peers) think she should do.:shrug:

Jesmonster2
November 6th, 2018, 05:41 AM
I agree with others about giving children the choice of when and how to cut their hair. I haven't cut my daughter's hair yet, other than one tiny trim and the bangs I cut into her hair when she was about 15 months and wouldn't keep a clip in her hair. It was always in her eyes. I'm letting it grow now that she is 2 and will keep a clip in her hair.

Though, I know it will probably become harder to care for her hair as it gets longer. Maybe I will change my mind if she has trouble keeping her hair out of her face or doesn't want me to mess with it. I always try to do very loose styles in her hair, and I use cloth covered clips and soft hair bands. But for her bangs, I have to use the metal clips. Nothing else will keep her hair out of her eyes.

I wonder if she will want to have it long or short as she gets older. When I was a little girl, I had long hair. It was about WL. My mom would do micro trims every month on my hair to keep it healthy.I remember that I used to always wear it loose to school, and the other girls would stroke my hair and braid it.

Then, I started experimenting with dye and getting it cut to shoulder length when I was 14. I wish I had never colored my hair, because I feel like I have been just trying to cover up dye mistakes and the regrowth line for the past twenty years. Honestly, it has been 19 years since I first colored my hair, and I have never successfully grown out the dye. :eek:

I don't think I will encourage my daughter to color her hair when she is older. She has such a pretty golden blonde anyway. Of course, after a certain age it is her choice alone.

Jesmonster2
November 6th, 2018, 05:47 AM
Yes! I have a daughter who just turned 4. I’m a big believer in allowing her to dress how she likes and have her hair how she likes. Therefore she has never had a haircut in her life (literally), and wears a Tangled Rapunzel dress most days haha!
My daughter’s hair is almost down to her hips when wet and straight, but it has a bit of waviness to it. I have no experience with waves myself but have considered researching curly-girl friendly methods as herxhair quite often just looks ‘boofy’. My daughter hates having her hair up, so I usually oil her ends and let it stay loose.
I definitely treat my daughter’s hair with the same amount of care and thought as my own.
My only wish is to trim my daughter’s hair just once, so that it is all the one length!

https://i.postimg.cc/Jzr6Wyxv/450-A0-F86-CA98-4-C7-B-A632-0-B6-B12-AAAB01.jpg

Your daughter has lovely hair. The color is so pretty. What do you use to oil the ends? My daughter also has curly/wavy hair. My hair is very straight, so I am glad she has some body, but I am not used to caring for wavy hair. I tried putting a little mineral oil or squalane oil in my daughter's hair, but it seemed too heavy. Her hair is very fine like mine. My hair doesn't seem to look good with oil in it either. I can't do coconut oil at all. It's way too heavy.

MamaLou
November 6th, 2018, 07:31 AM
MamaLou does your daughter like hats?

I don't have children :p


I have no experience with this at all

LittleHealthy
November 6th, 2018, 02:23 PM
Your daughter has lovely hair. The color is so pretty. What do you use to oil the ends? My daughter also has curly/wavy hair. My hair is very straight, so I am glad she has some body, but I am not used to caring for wavy hair. I tried putting a little mineral oil or squalane oil in my daughter's hair, but it seemed too heavy. Her hair is very fine like mine. My hair doesn't seem to look good with oil in it either. I can't do coconut oil at all. It's way too heavy.

I just use Argan or Almond oil on my daughter’s hair. But I never leave her hair loose with the oil in as her hair is super fine (like mine). We often do a plait like this which doesn’t hurt her head or pull too tightly, and hides the oil. I also spray her hat with diluted tea tree oil in the hope that when she’s around other kids it will stop her possibly contracting head lice!! Haha.

Jesmonster2
November 6th, 2018, 03:39 PM
I just use Argan or Almond oil on my daughter’s hair. But I never leave her hair loose with the oil in as her hair is super fine (like mine). We often do a plait like this which doesn’t hurt her head or pull too tightly, and hides the oil. I also spray her hat with diluted tea tree oil in the hope that when she’s around other kids it will stop her possibly contracting head lice!! Haha.
Oh, tea tree oil against lice is a good idea! My daughter is starting kindergarten (German daycare, not US Kindergarten) soon. I will try that.

lapushka
November 6th, 2018, 05:10 PM
I had a page-boy style cut until age 5, when I went to first grade. Then as the year went on I asked my mom to grow my hair, and at first she was like "okay" and just kept taking me to the stylist (no longer the barber), but then after about a year when I realized it wasn't growing, I put my foot down (LOL, can you imagine) and said I refused to go to the stylist. From then on my mom kept having me go to get my bangs done but she allowed me to grow out my hair. I reached classic age 10/11. We did still have the odd trim here and there, as that was what my mom asked of me.

I protested terribly when it needed to be combed out, though!

Then when I was old enough to care for it myself, I had it cut to a page-boy style again. Go figure.

But my mom, when I was about 5/6, let me decide for myself, I firmly believe that there's an age for a kid to decide for themselves.

LittleHealthy
November 12th, 2018, 02:52 AM
Oh, tea tree oil against lice is a good idea! My daughter is starting kindergarten (German daycare, not US Kindergarten) soon. I will try that.

Yes my daughter starts kinder (proper school in Australia) next February so I’m hoping the tea tree will be a good deterrent!

Simsy
November 12th, 2018, 05:34 AM
Mum did monthly or so haircuts for anyone who wanted them; the deal being, if we cared for our own hair, we decided how to wear it. If mum had to help, she got a say in how long it was. I don’t think any of us had hair much past our shoulders in primary school, though it’s hard to tell with the curls on 2 of us. All 3 girls grew hair long in high school and trimmed back closer to graduation.

To a point, this works for me. If the child is caring for it themselves; brushing it properly, and learning to style it; then they have final say on hair length. If the parent is more involved and/or doing the majority of the work in caring for the child’s hair, the parent has a say in the hair length (up to 50/50). This has the dual benefit of allowing the parent to choose the workload they are prepared to deal with and incentivises the child to learning to care for their own hair with minimal assistance; so that they may have more say in their hair length and style.

hannabiss
November 12th, 2018, 07:57 AM
My boys have short hair and use shampoo 2x a week. My daughters hair is (what would be, shes 8 ) BSL and we use shampoo once a week. And a heavy conditioner on the length. I braid her hair at night to reduce tangles. She usually washes her own hair as Ive taught her how. But about once a month I clarify it. She does pretty good though. Her hair is very fine like mine. She wants to do the no trim 2019. Ive onlu trimmed her hair once in the last 4 years but her ends are starting to need the yearly trim.