Have you ever been judged for your hair sticks/combs?

[Brittny]

Hi everyone. :flower:

For awhile I have been dealing with the worst headaches and a tender scalp. Every day I put my hair into a bun to put out of the way for school or work and by the end of the day it feels so sensitive to touch. After joining this lovely forum, I bought a couple of hair sticks! They are very cheap and nothing fancy, just two wooden hair sticks from Ebay. However, after I put in the hair sticks I feel like a new person! Seriously, my hair has never felt so secure and pain-free in my life. Usually my buns are very heavy and droop back, pulling on the front of my scalp all the time which is my most sensitive area. Today, I wore my hair stick to school and I was honestly excited to show off my new hair stuff!

I got to my college campus and found that some people were looking at my hair oddly(Could have just been my imagination, but that is how I felt). Eventually I get to class and this woman made it a point to ask about my hair sticks and why I was wearing them? Initially I thought she was just curious and I explained how heavy my hair was. Of course, the conversation did not end there - leading to her make a side comment about showing off and cultural appropriation. Anyways, I decided not to indulge and just went about the lecture

Has anyone ever received this kind of attention from their hair accessories?

I was so excited to show off my hair sticks and go a day without scalp pain. I'm only 20 and don't have very thick skin, so maybe I just took this to heart. Any thoughts? :heartbeat

[CopperButterfly]

I've never had that kind of judgement about my hair sticks. I also think it's ridiculous. Wear your hair how you want, especially if it's more comfortable. People find the strangest things to get offended over.

[Estrid]

Sounds like you ran into someone who way overthink things, cultural appropriation?! :lol:

There are strange people out there, pay them no mind.

I've personally only had positive reactions, but most people here just don't comment on it at all. People do look, but that's normal, they probably aren't used to seeing hair worn in that way and with a hair stick.

[nycelle]

She's got way too much free time, and nothing going on if she gave your hair sticks that much thought.. sorry.

[spidermom]

No. In fact, I have never received any comment at all about hair sticks.

[ravenskey]

Cultural appropriation, which culture exactly?! Hair sticks can be made FROM chopsticks but they are NOT the SAME as chopsticks so it always boggles my mind why people get it into their heads that hair sticks are exclusively Asian. They were used in Ancient Egypt, Rome, Greece - the list goes on.

[Sora Rose]

I have noticed people double-taking when I walk past, and little kids certainly stare, but nobody has ever passed any comments. Ever.

[EssleyBlue]

If it is simply a hair stick from eBay and you didn't take a pair of chopsticks out of my rice bowl and stick it in your hair, it should be fine. :D
(As a side note: if someone brings up an issue about cultural appropriation, I do try to listen first with an open heart and be kind and try to see things from their perspective.)
Yay for for pain free updo's!

[nycelle]

People put their hair up with pencils and pens all the time, no different than a hair stick. But no one says "cultural appropriation" You should of told her "B***h please."

[C_Bookworm]

Congrats on finding some hair toys that work well for you. Yay for no scalp pain!

Honestly, her ‘showing off’ comment reveals what that really was...a giant dose of envy, laced with a little special-snowflake-easily-triggered nonsense. Don’t let her steal your joy. I’m sure your new hairsticks look lovely on you. :flower:

[Chromis]

No, she is the one being weird.

[Sarahlabyrinth]

I probably would have said "Hair sticks are part of my culture." (Long haired culture). She must have very few problems in her life to be worrying about your hair.....Don't worry what she says, you do you....

[lithostoic]

No that's the most ridiculous thing and if anyone had a problem with mine, I'd promptly tell them where they can stick it.

[paulownia]

if anyone had a problem with mine, I'd promptly tell them where they can stick it.
Priceless remark! :D
I would love to be able to wear hair sticks, but my hair is too short. They are very elegant and versatile. Recently I was watching one of my favourite movies, Memoirs of a Geisha, and I was in awe of beautiful traditional hairtoys I noticed. I can’t wait to buy and wear something similar!
This lady is just jealous. Don’t even bother.

[Aerya]

Oh my. I agree we should all be respectful of other cultures, but some people just like being offended I think. I once had a girl say I shouldn't wear braids. :p

[Xlena]

I guess she's talking about Chinese culture, but wikipedia says this: "Hairsticks have been in use for thousands of years, and have been found in cultures of the Ancient Egyptians, Romans and Greeks."
So if it is 'culture appropiation' she should specify. As my culture (Spanish) comes from Roman culture, I tell you no one here cares what you do with hairsticks on your hair because that's none of our business xd So... she's simply very ridiculous and it's better you ignore people like that because they clearly just want a nonsense argument.

[Rosetta]

She's got way too much free time, and nothing going on if she gave your hair sticks that much thought.. sorry.
TBH, these kind of comments are just as judgemental and disrespecful as the original comment (if not more)... And the same for comments like "she's just jealous", etc. You've never met or seen that person the story is about, you don't know a thing about her or her life, or her feelings (whether she's feeling jealousy or any other feeling *you* imagine), so I please don't be so judgemental. This same issue has always bothered me here, THB; I truly don't think sympatizing with the OP's predicament requires getting into guessing games and hurling insults at others...

And yeah, the cultural appropriation thing is generally quite a weird accusation; but in this case the thinking behind it seems very common, after all people do see hairsticks as Asian. (I had no idea they've ever been use anywhere else, either.) But unless you are actively culturally appropriating, i.e. doing it on purpose, I'd let it go in one ear & out of the other. ;)

[nycelle]

TBH, these kind of comments are just as judgemental and disrespecful as the original comment (if not more)... And the same for comments like "she's just jealous", etc. You've never met or seen that person the story is about, you don't know a thing about her or her life, or her feelings (whether she's feeling jealousy or any other feeling *you* imagine), so I please don't be so judgemental. This same issue has always bothered me here, THB; I truly don't think sympatizing with the OP's predicament requires getting into guessing games and hurling insults at others...

And yeah, the cultural appropriation thing is quite funny and a bit strange way to think, but seems very common, after all people do see hairsticks as Asian. (I had no idea they've ever been use anywhere else, either.) But unless you are actively culturally appropriating, i.e. doing it on purpose, I'd let it go in one ear & out of the other. ;)

Oh I see.. so uh.. someones ridiculous comment doesn't warrant a response? OK.. whatevs

Your comment is no better and just as judgy.

[bparnell75]

I probably would have said "Hair sticks are part of my culture." (Long haired culture). She must have very few problems in her life to be worrying about your hair.....Don't worry what she says, you do you....

I totally agree with Sarah L. Hair sticks are my culture from LHC. My hair is my hobby and so are my sticks and forks. I have only had positive and fascinated remarks.

[Ylva]

TBH, these kind of comments are just as judgemental and disrespecful as the original comment (if not more)... And the same for comments like "she's just jealous", etc. You've never met or seen that person the story is about, you don't know a thing about her or her life, or her feelings (whether she's feeling jealousy or any other feeling *you* imagine), so I please don't be so judgemental. This same issue has always bothered me here, THB; I truly don't think sympatizing with the OP's predicament requires getting into guessing games and hurling insults at others...

And yeah, the cultural appropriation thing is generally quite a weird accusation; but in this case the thinking behind it seems very common, after all people do see hairsticks as Asian. (I had no idea they've ever been use anywhere else, either.) But unless you are actively culturally appropriating, i.e. doing it on purpose, I'd let it go in one ear & out of the other. ;)

We can't all be watching our words to such degree that no judgement of any level ever comes out. It's just a part of being human, we judge each other and ourselves constantly. Nothing that would qualify as an "insult" in my terms has been said in this thread. It's totally okay IMO to regard the comments the OP received as "senseless" or think it sounds like jealousy. Turning a stranger's feelings into something you carry excessive weight on your shoulders for, when she stranger was the one initiating this strange and most unnecessary interaction, is nothing to worry about. Having an opinion about someone's views is alright. We don't need to be insulted over absolutely everything.

[Wravyn]

Wow, people find the weirdest things to fixate on. But hey, I did find an article that has a brief history of hair sticks (https://www.fashionologiahistoriana.com/costume-history-legends-essays-in-english/female-hairstyle-jewelry-in-the-ancient-times-hairpins) (pins) if you want to print it out and share it with her. ;)

It's actually a fascinating read. According to the author, hairpins are found in archaeological excavations and date back to the Bronze Age (between 4000 and 3000 B.C. ).

[Aerya]

Wow, people find the weirdest things to fixate on. But hey, I did find an article that has a brief history of hair sticks (https://www.fashionologiahistoriana.com/costume-history-legends-essays-in-english/female-hairstyle-jewelry-in-the-ancient-times-hairpins) (pins) if you want to print it out and share it with her. ;)

It's actually a fascinating read. According to the author, hairpins are found in archaeological excavations and date back to the Bronze Age (between 4000 and 3000 B.C. ).

This is interesting, thank you for sharing! I tried to google the origin of hair sticks myself but a lot of the results were about cultural appropriation related to chopsticks in hair. Perhaps that is what the person in the OP was thinking?

[*Wednesday*]

Hi everyone. :flower:
I got to my college campus and found that some people were looking at my hair oddly(Could have just been my imagination, but that is how I felt). Eventually I get to class and this woman made it a point to ask about my hair sticks and why I was wearing them? Initially I thought she was just curious and I explained how heavy my hair was. Of course, the conversation did not end there - leading to her make a side comment about showing off and cultural appropriation. Anyways, I decided not to indulge and just went about the lecture

Has anyone ever received this kind of attention from their hair accessories?


To answer the question, no.

Are you attending school on the planet Saturn? With all the unusual hairstyles in today’s society, people were “oddly” looking at hair stick? Which are not usually quite noticeable unless someone is behind you?

I thought people with blue hair were showing off and culturally appropriating to Avatar.

[littlestarface]

People put their hair up with pencils and pens all the time, no different than a hair stick. But no one says "cultural appropriation" You should of told her "B***h please."

Exactly! I know I would have and just been like bish you wish you had this LI now get out me face and go live your pathetic life. But I don't let anyone try n put me down unless its my boyfriend :rollin:

[blesseddamozel]

I wouldn't mind what she said at all. Sounds like a busybody if you're asking me.

[Arciela]

Wow, people find the weirdest things to fixate on. But hey, I did find an article that has a brief history of hair sticks (https://www.fashionologiahistoriana.com/costume-history-legends-essays-in-english/female-hairstyle-jewelry-in-the-ancient-times-hairpins) (pins) if you want to print it out and share it with her. ;)

It's actually a fascinating read. According to the author, hairpins are found in archaeological excavations and date back to the Bronze Age (between 4000 and 3000 B.C. ).

Thanks for sharing the article that was very interesting! I'd love to have some of those hairpins :D and I agree..people do find the most bizarre things to focus on, its like who cares if someone is using hair sticks! It's a simple thing :flower:

[Wravyn]

I thought people with blue hair were showing off and culturally appropriating to Avatar.

Haha! You slay me! :laugh:

[Milady_DeWinter]

No, never happened to me, and it's much better that it doesn't ever happen.

You guys are much nicer than me, I would have probably gave her a quite bad response. I'm not very patience sometimes... Esp with random strangers critics because of their blah brain :shrug:

"Are you conscious that those sticks are pretty sharp, RIGHT?"

[Guitargod]

Whew what an obnoxious creature you've met there.
Cultural appropriation even...
I'll gladly admit to wearing an actual chopstick in my hair every day. Maybe I should stop and use an eagle feather instead :)

[Borgessa]

Were you wearing chop sticks? Because some folk like to be outraged at cultural appropriation, when no one is offended at all. I have heard wearing chopsticks in your hair is offensive to Asian people who use them for food. But its not, they just think we look a bit silly apparently, kinda equivalent to us walking around with a knife and fork in our hair.

[spidermom]

Thank goodness my youth was before so much cultural sensitivity. I used to roll my shag haircut with small sponge rollers (or pincurls), pop an afro (that's what we called it back in the 70s) wig over the curlers, and go off to college like that (ages 19-20). When my hair dried, I'd pick it out into an afro. I wasn't trying to appropriate anybody's culture; I thought the style was one of the most beautiful things I'd ever seen, and I wanted it. Nobody ever called me out over it.

[Ligeia Noire]

All and I mean all of my hairsticks are indeed chopsticks. Fancy ones that come in nice cases that I buy at the Korean market. They don't give two cents about what I use them for. They want to sell them and I want to wear them. Especially because chopsticks are actually long enough for me. Is it cultural appropriation?
I don't care and you can cry me a river if that offends you. I am using them because I like them.
Pardon my french but these remarks just make my Celtic blood boil.. and no one actually ever made a negative comment about my chopsticks. People actually offer me sets to wear. I find myself refraining from commenting on a lot of the threads these days because of all this newfound nonsensical offence prone mentality.

[Alila]

My female friends love my hairsticks. But I have gotten asked why I'm wearing a pencil in my hair once. (It was a plain black chopstick turned hairstick with a hand painted celtic inspired snake drawn at the top, thank you very much. I put a lot of effort into my hairsticks)
Maybe I should just wear something more jewellery like next time XD

Quite a while ago I made a set of two hairsticks that were inspired by chinese jewlery. With red thread wrapped around the end and a dangly gold chain and a dragon charm and stuff. It looks really nice but I've never worn it out because I'm affraid someone might take offence. The cultural appropiation comment seems out of the blue when wearing a simple wooden stick though.

I hope you don't take her comment to heart. When trying something different and unconventional it can be really hard to get critisized for it. Don't be disheartend though. Hairsticks are wonderful, as art projects, tools and jewellery.
Maybe ask a few friends or your family what they think about your new hairsticks. In my experience people usually keep compliments to themselves.

[Corvana]

Tools to keep one's hair up have been used in every culture since the dawn of culture. Hair ties, sticks, forks... whatever, it's been used in multiple cultures before those cultures ever encountered each other. It's not really rocket science to wrap a strip of leather around one's hair or to wrap one's hair and shove a stick in it or a bone or an antler. Simultaneous invention of something is actually pretty common, and when it comes to things that are practical, it's even more likely. That's why braids are found in several cultures, and stuff like cups. Are cups cultural appropriation? No, because they were invented by tons of cultures for a practical purpose. Now, designs of said cups or sticks or forks are more cultural, sure. I won't speak on using those, as I don't feel like I can.

Do I personally find even using Asian styled hair sticks or chopsticks problematic, as an Asian American? No, as long as the use isn't for like... a parody or caricature (like for those ****ty halloween costumes). Using them as they should be used, day to day, because you appreciate them for what they are? That's in fact the best time to use them. That sort of use doesn't hurt people, like the previously mentioned costume does. So, for example, Ligeia's use of chopsticks is, in my opinion, a good use of them that doesn't cause any sort of harm. She has them and loves them, and uses them with positive feelings and intentions.

And anyway, your average regular hair stick isn't confined to a single culture, so it's fine in general anyway. Vikings used them, Romans, Greeks, Asians, Germans. Like, everyone basically. It's fine, and if she comments again tell her she's clearly uneducated on the subject of hair accessories and to at least do some research before scolding you.

[trolleypup]

She's being weird, some people love to play police and put their nose where it doesn't belong.

Never gotten any negative comments on my hairsticks (actual chopsticks or otherwise), but then, white male privilege shields me from most of that stuff.

What I do get is commentary like What is holding your bun up? Is that a chopstick? Is that a nail? Haha do you eat with that stick? How does it work? Can I touch your hair?


Stainless steel chopstick, aluminum gutter spike, etc.
Yes or no
Actually an aluminum gutter spike, or whatever...
Sure, I keep a spare in my bag (very rarely, since I also have a couple pairs of nice chopsticks in my bag)
*bun drop* *quick bun*
Yes or no or only if you need to moisturize your skin


Recently I actually got a compliment for carrying a discreet weapon.

[MusicalSpoons]

Comments? Only from children, usually 'your hair thing is pretty' though one boy told me I looked like Mulan :grin:
Judgement? Never that anyone has cared to express :shrug:

Racism is still a huge problem in the world, and it's good to be mindful and sensitive to racial and cultural issues ... but the rest of the woman's comment shows she wasn't just being oversensitive yet well-intentioned. To accuse you of showing off is just mean, in my opinion, and totally uncalled for. She may well have added the accusation of cultural appropriation as something she thought you wouldn't dare refute. If it's someone you often see or deal with, maybe try printing out that article for her to read. Her react will reveal much about whether she truly cares about the cultural aspect in the slightest! And if she doesn't, well, her loss and her ignorance.

I'm really glad you've found a way to keep your hair up that's comfortable, and I hope you continue to enjoy your hairsticks!

[illicitlizard]

Oh god as a young person it makes me so annoyed to see actually useful progressive and feminist rhetoric bastardised by people exploring 'babies first sjw movement' like, you don't have to call out every little thing. Sometimes, a hair stick is just a hair stick. It ain't 'problematic'. For goodness sake, do some research and make sure what you're criticising is actually an issue!

OP it sucks that someone judged you for simply wearing your hair up in a different way. Eugh. Keep wearing the comfy hair thing : )

[AmaryllisRed]

I actually worry about being accused of cultural appropriation EVERY SINGLE TIME I wear a stick or fork in my hair. It's comforting (but surprising) to me that no one else here has had anything said to them.

[Knightly]

Yes, at school. I always wear two chopsticks my aunt brought me from Japan, so they certainly look different. Some class mates ask me why I wear them (in a subtly rude way) or ask if I'm from China (im white btw), also make racist jokes about asians, like 'trying' to speak Chinese. Some of them would poke them or take them off. It's sooooo annoying.
And I'm so afraid of posting pics of me wearing my chopsticks, I don't wanna be accused of 'cultural appropriation' 😂.

[cjk]

College students are among the stupidest people you'll ever encounter. Don't let their opinions affect you, they're usually unsupportable drivel.

Sorry you had to put up with that sort of judgmental negativity.

[cjk]

Pardon my french but these remarks just make my Celtic blood boil.. and no one actually ever made a negative comment about my chopsticks. People actually offer me sets to wear. I find myself refraining from commenting on a lot of the threads these days because of all this newfound nonsensical offence prone mentality.

I have friends who have brought me back souvenirs from overseas trips...one is in China, today. And if he chooses to bring me back some chopsticks, I will be grateful and honored to wear them.

The fancy ones are just so classically, artistically...pretty.

[Alissalocks]

Some people just suck. I'm kinda thin skinned about stuff too, so I understand, but take comfort knowing you're surrounding need by far more intelligent people here. :flower:

[Sarahlabyrinth]

I was once asked why I had a screwdriver in my hair (it was an ONN oval hair stick) - I just burst out laughing at them....really, if you can't tell the difference between a hair stick and a screwdriver then you probably need a screwdriver to tighten your loose screw.....

[Lady Stardust]

It’s the “showing off” comment that I find most annoying. Some people dress very minimally, some dress flamboyantly and others are somewhere in between. There’s no right or wrong and there’s room for all of us. It would be boring if we were all the same.

[Ligeia Noire]

I have friends who have brought me back souvenirs from overseas trips...one is in China, today. And if he chooses to bring me back some chopsticks, I will be grateful and honored to wear them.

The fancy ones are just so classically, artistically...pretty.

I actually prefer them. They are lighter prettier, longer and thinner.. and less expensive. Proper hairsticks are to bulky for me. Most of them anyway. I love all the different colours and designs you can get. Talking about it. I need to buy some more :p

Sarah that just cracked me up 🤣

[MusicalSpoons]

I was once asked why I had a screwdriver in my hair (it was an ONN oval hair stick) - I just burst out laughing at them....really, if you can't tell the difference between a hair stick and a screwdriver then you probably need a screwdriver to tighten your loose screw.....

Oh. Wow :crazyq: that's ... well, that's not the usual, run-of-the-mill type of stupid comment anyway :rollin:

It occurred to me that longhairs cannot win with the type of person to make petty comments - if we wear our hair down we're showing it off, and if we wear it up, we're showing off our ... what? hairtoys/bun skillz/?? :shrug:

I do like the thought of longhair culture though, and hairsticks / forks being part of that :D

[illicitlizard]

College students are among the stupidest people you'll ever encounter. Don't let their opinions affect you, they're usually unsupportable drivel.

Sorry you had to put up with that sort of judgmental negativity.

As a Uni student, completely agree. It's such a weird stage of knowing very little, but feeling like you know everything. Maybe it's something to do with the transition from the restriction of school to the relative freedom of college and wanting to prove oneself. Who knows.

[spirals]

Whew what an obnoxious creature you've met there.
Cultural appropriation even...
I'll gladly admit to wearing an actual chopstick in my hair every day. Maybe I should stop and use an eagle feather instead :)
Me, too. My mom appropriated some chopsticks, cut them down, sanded them, and painted them to be hair sticks. Whether they are or are not chopsticks at this point, I don't care.


But its not, they just think we look a bit silly apparently, kinda equivalent to us walking around with a knife and fork in our hair.
I've seen a picture of a fork used as a stick.

Corvana, I'm not going to quote your long post on page 4, but it's the most sensible thing I've read today.



It occurred to me that longhairs cannot win with the type of person to make petty comments - if we wear our hair down we're showing it off, and if we wear it up, we're showing off our ... what? hairtoys/bun skillz/?? :shrug:
It's probably because either way we have something they don't think they can get even though all it takes is not throwing money at a stylist every 6 weeks....

[lunalocks]

My only comments have been positive. I rarely wear sticks, but when I do the comments are always positive. I wear a fork just about Every day. Usually people say "i really like that stick thing in your hair. " No one has heard of a hair fork.

Oops, once. I had someone say "oh that's what hippies wore in the 70's"

(doesn't help that I was a hippie in the 70s, but I never saw hair forks in the 70s!)

[Jo Ann]

...I thought people with blue hair were showing off and culturally appropriating to Avatar.

*looks at jars of MP Atomic Turquoise and Rockabilly Blue...backs away slowly...*

[Jo Ann]

Gee, and I thought my biggest problem was asking if my hair stick would be considered a weapon when I started my job back in February, Brittny!

I have, though, found my hair stick is useful in removing paper jams on my register printers... :shrug:

[Kat]

I've never had any issues, but, I don't always tend to notice how people are looking at me, so...

Oh, wait, yes I have. I once got lectured by a woman in a store. I was probably wearing one of my DPNs-as-hairstick, because she started going off on me, what if I fell and hit my head, the hair stick would go right through my skull, etc. etc. Apparently she once had a friend who fell and hit her head on a curb but luckily her hair comb was plastic so it just broke etc. No matter what I said I couldn't put her off... that I wasn't worried about it, that if I fell and hit my head on a curb I had bigger problems than my hairsticks, that if I fell and it pierced my skull then I'd be dead so what would I care. (She also said that for safety I should "put a bead" on the end. Like, if this thing will go through bone (you think), you don't think it'll go through some chintzy little wood or plastic bead? Also, if it's got beads on the end, how TF am I supposed to get it into my hair??)

I wish I'd just been harsh: I don't care, stop lecturing me and leave me alone. (But of course, that would have been "rude." And we can't be "rude" in American culture, even if we're only responding to someone else being rude. Because, y'know, she was just being concerned and trying to give advice to this obviously young and stupid person {yes, unfortunately, my appearance tends to make people think I'm young and stupid, hence why she probably felt comfortable starting in on me in the first place} who then responded just so rudely rather than standing there being lectured and made to feel very foolish and uncomfortable for several minutes. Blah blah. Some day I will learn to not care if I'm "rude" and just be harsh with people who need it. I don't care if someone thinks they're being "nice" and "helpful"-- they need to learn not to bother strangers who don't want to be bothered.)

I know some people talk about people who "wear chopsticks in their hair" as cultural appropriation. I always want to tell these people that for a lot of people who want to try hairsticks, chopsticks are the only thing they can find to use without having to order online, and who wants to do that and pay shipping for two little sticks you don't even know if you'll like, when you can get chopsticks anywhere? I've never met anyone who thinks they're doing anything cultural-- they just think they're putting their hair up with something handy. They might use cute chopsticks, but they're still simply a hair tool.

But maybe in some places it's a "thing" where some people think they look all cute and Chinese doing it, and that's what pisses people off? (are there even any Asian cultures that use hairsticks in the way most Americans do? I can think of a few Asian hairstick styles, but they're not the same, and either the hairsticks are much different, or used more for decoration than structurally holding up the hair.) I mean, I can see where wearing chopsticks in your hair might be a faux-pas -- it could be seen as the equivalent of wearing a spoon in your hair which will look strange-- but I wouldn't think it would be downright offensive.

But it also occurred to me recently: some people may not know that hairsticks, proper hairsticks, are even a thing, so may think that anyone wearing hairsticks in their hair is wearing chopsticks??


I don't know if I could say hairsticks are used in my culture (Eastern European?). I can't really claim that culture, anyway-- I've never been to any of those countries, don't speak the languages (didn't know my grandmother did until after she died and my mom told me so), haven't had any of the cultural practices kept up in my family, IOW am the typical progeny of people who came to the U.S. and immediately dropped the culture they came from and never looked back. Hairsticks are a thing in American "culture," so I guess I can say they're part of my culture...




And yeah, the cultural appropriation thing is generally quite a weird accusation; but in this case the thinking behind it seems very common, after all people do see hairsticks as Asian.

Then they're just as bad. If wearing chopsticks or hairsticks in your hair because you think it's Asian is wrong, then so is thinking it's Asian when it's not. If ignorance is cultural appropriation, then it is for everyone on every side of the fence.

[MusicalSpoons]

Then they're just as bad. If wearing chopsticks or hairsticks in your hair because you think it's Asian is wrong, then so is thinking it's Asian when it's not. If ignorance is cultural appropriation, then it is for everyone on every side of the fence.

All good points, but this one sums it up perfectly. If you're going took accuse others of doing offensive things, at least get your facts straight first!

I've spent a lot of time with Chinese people, and been to quite a few events in Chinese, and many of the attendees wore genuine Chinese outfits with the beautiful embroidery and gorgeous colours - I only ever saw someone with chopsticks in her hair once (a British-born Chinese girl) which were purely for decoration :shrug: [I know Chinese ≠ Asian, but the people over here who stereotype tend to automatically think of Chinese first, forgetting about most or all the other countries in that part of the world :rolleyes: ]

[MoonRabbit]

Nope never got any weird comments. Only the occasional curious glance, which is only caused by seeing an uncommon accessory. I wear authentic chopsticks everyday, even when I go to Asian style restaurants. Nobody ever cared nor looked offended.

Usually cultural appropriation is called out by someone that isn't even affiliated with the culture to begin with.

I also use knitting needles as hair sticks. So I guess I am also appropriating the knitting community. Oops

[Kat]

I also use knitting needles as hair sticks. So I guess I am also appropriating the knitting community. Oops

Yup. I almost exclusively use DPNs (okay, I don't own anything else that could be called "hairsticks"...). IMO, that's the only thing they're good for, lol.

Although when visiting my mom and lacking hairsticks to quickly put my hair up for a shower, I would borrow a pair of knitting needles... usually circular needles, since they didn't have the needle part too long and poke me in the neck. She would crack up at seeing the cable hovering around my head like a messed-up halo.

[Strands]

Oh god. People like her - claiming cultural ~ApRoPrIaTiOn~ are the reason I don't talk to people on a regular basis. My eyes just rolled so far back in my head that they are now stuck in the next dimension. great.

[Andthetalltrees]

Yup. I almost exclusively use DPNs (okay, I don't own anything else that could be called "hairsticks"...). IMO, that's the only thing they're good for, lol.

Although when visiting my mom and lacking hairsticks to quickly put my hair up for a shower, I would borrow a pair of knitting needles... usually circular needles, since they didn't have the needle part too long and poke me in the neck. She would crack up at seeing the cable hovering around my head like a messed-up halo.

I've regularly been using a crochet hook lately as a hairstick, it's almost too perfect hah

[Jo Ann]

Oh god. People like her - claiming cultural ~ApRoPrIaTiOn~ are the reason I don't talk to people on a regular basis. My eyes just rolled so far back in my head that they are now stuck in the next dimension. great.

My experience is that people who scream "CULTURAL APPROPRIATION ELEVENTY!!11!!" are easily o-fended by just about everything. It must really bite going through life in such an unhappy, unhealthy state of mind.

[spirals]

Oh, wait, yes I have. I once got lectured by a woman in a store. I was probably wearing one of my DPNs-as-hairstick, because she started going off on me, what if I fell and hit my head, the hair stick would go right through my skull, etc. etc.
What is she on? If you fell down in all likelihood the stick would fall out your hair just like your bag would probably fly out of your hand. Physics are a thing. And while I'm at it, the end of the stick isn't pointed at your skull, as if that would even matter; the stick is parallel to your head. Plus, an aluminum anything is not going to pierce a skull. If it could even stay in the hair long enough to be compromised in some way, it would bend. My bet is on it hitting the ground, not your head.

[cjk]

Oh, wait, yes I have. I once got lectured by a woman in a store. I was probably wearing one of my DPNs-as-hairstick, because she started going off on me, what if I fell and hit my head, the hair stick would go right through my skull, etc. etc. Apparently she once had a friend who fell and hit her head on a curb but luckily her hair comb was plastic so it just broke etc.

At least, irrational though it might be, she had a reason and showed some concern.

Much easier to forgive than some shrill first year student whose hippy professor told xer (gender is a societal construct) that everything is fundamentally offensive to everyone.

And if you're not offended, you're just uninformed and require correction.

[Kat]

I believe cultural appropriation is A Thing, but I also believe it can be taken too far, like being offended FOR someone else (there are ways to let someone know "hey maybe don't dress in blackface for Halloween 'cause that's offensive" without freaking out over it) or blaming one person for something other people do ("somewhere once I saw someone wear chopsticks in their hair and say they were Chinese, now everyone who wears hairsticks is trying to be an offensive jerk").



I've regularly been using a crochet hook lately as a hairstick, it's almost too perfect hah

I think I tried that once... made the mistake of trying to pull it back out the way it went in... with the expected results...



What is she on? If you fell down in all likelihood the stick would fall out your hair just like your bag would probably fly out of your hand. Physics are a thing. And while I'm at it, the end of the stick isn't pointed at your skull, as if that would even matter; the stick is parallel to your head. Plus, an aluminum anything is not going to pierce a skull. If it could even stay in the hair long enough to be compromised in some way, it would bend. My bet is on it hitting the ground, not your head.

I mean, technically, with the angle I put in hair sticks at (usually around 10 and 2; with the way I wrap a bun, 10:00 is pretty much the functional position for holding a bun {2:00 is usually just additional support}), I guess if I fell just the right way it could poke the back of my neck, or slide down and hit my shoulder? Still not exactly the brain-skewering scenario she had in mind; I'm not sure if I'd even have to worry about it stabbing my spinal cord if done at just the right angle.




At least, irrational though it might be, she had a reason and showed some concern.

Much easier to forgive than some shrill first year student whose hippy professor told xer (gender is a societal construct) that everything is fundamentally offensive to everyone.

And if you're not offended, you're just uninformed and require correction.

But I didn't need her concern, especially after I tried to tell her several times that it was okay, I wasn't worried about the thing she was worried about. I didn't need her condescending "Oh chile let me save you from yourself" tone. I don't like being lectured, especially in front of a bunch of other people (we were in line for the checkout, so the several people in front of us listened to every word of her tirade), and I don't like being treated like a child by someone who isn't even my mom or even someone I know. And I didn't especially want to talk to a random stranger at length when I just wanted to be left with my own thoughts and go about my business...

[Brittny]

Update:
Thank you everyone for the warm responses! I feel so much better about wearing my hair sticks with all the support from this community. Thankfully the woman has not spoken another word to me, instead she moved seats! I was prepared to educate her on hair culture with those awesome articles provided by some of you, but at least I can get through my lecture in peace without snide comments making me feel bad. You guys brought up great points about culture, Long hair culture is definitely my culture. :flower: