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View Full Version : How to cope with phases of wanting to chop it all off?!



helen2806
November 3rd, 2008, 05:50 AM
Hi! I'm a newbie, but came here because I'm currently going through one of my 'ARGH-I-want-to-cut-it-all-off-and-start-fresh' phases. I'm 20 and never had hair longer than shoulder length until I was about 17, but since then I've been keeping it much longer (mainly because I moved to university and was too lazy/cheap to sort out hair cuts!). I don't know if I'm just bored of my hair, but I know if I cut it shorter I'd hate it after about a day - so this is what I keep telling myself. My mum & sister have been telling me off when I suggest cutting it because "my hair's so nice", but they're the total opposite from me so it's hard to listen! (I'm naturally blonde, with hair about BSL whilst theyre both v short brunette hair). How does anyone else cope with phases like this?
Thanks for any advice! Xxx :)

Faepirate
November 3rd, 2008, 06:03 AM
When I'm in a phases of "ARGH MUST CUT!" I occupy myself with the condition - I'm the kind of person who is easily satisfied with a new obsession ;) so for me it was a few months of experiment after experiment (trying out different oils, wash routines, learning new styles) and admiring all the long hair pics on LHC and thinking, "if I can keep going until waist, my hair will start getting really pretty" (and it did! Yay!) Before i knew it, I was past the awkward BSL stage (I don't care what people say, my hair did not look long at BSL, it just looked WEIRD and poofy because of the type and thickness! :p) and happily at waist. My hair is not perfect but I'm much happier with it now than I was at BSL.

bella77
November 3rd, 2008, 06:05 AM
I chopped and I regret it every day! Don't do it if you want to grow out your hair!

mommy101405
November 3rd, 2008, 06:32 AM
I'm going through it now. I hate then when I put my hair up (which is pretty much every day) I have a thousand little hairs sticking out everywhere. I just keep coming here and looking at all the long hair pics. So far I haven't chopped.

Silver & Gold
November 3rd, 2008, 06:38 AM
This past year I've put my hair up in one way or another when I get the urge to chop. I've become quite enamored with hairsticks and have amassed a nice collection of them. I'll pick a suitable hairstick and put my hair up. Since my hair isn't quite 20" yet, this strategy has gotten me past a lot of bad hair days.
Now that my hair is getting longer and the bangs and layers are long enough not to fall out of my updo it's getting easier and easier for me as my hair grows to put it up when I'm having a bad hair day.

helen2806
November 3rd, 2008, 06:58 AM
When I'm in a phases of "ARGH MUST CUT!" I occupy myself with the condition - I'm the kind of person who is easily satisfied with a new obsession ;) so for me it was a few months of experiment after experiment (trying out different oils, wash routines, learning new styles) and admiring all the long hair pics on LHC and thinking, "if I can keep going until waist, my hair will start getting really pretty" (and it did! Yay!) Before i knew it, I was past the awkward BSL stage (I don't care what people say, my hair did not look long at BSL, it just looked WEIRD and poofy because of the type and thickness! :p) and happily at waist. My hair is not perfect but I'm much happier with it now than I was at BSL.

Yeah my hair feels really awkward at this length! It has a really annoying tendency to go kind of triangular unless I go to the effort of smoothing it down loads. Other people's long hair pics have definitely been inspiring me today - I've been admiring them instead of writing the essay I'm supposed to be doing!

Thanks everyone! Xxx

spidermom
November 3rd, 2008, 07:35 AM
Long-haired people can have a short-haired look just by putting their hair up. That's what I do when I have issues with my hair -- put it up as quickly as I can without looking at it. Then every time I catch sight of it in a mirror, it's like having short hair. One day I get tired of that and take it down and comb it out and admire it ............ ahhhhhhh; I have long hair.

Curlsgirl
November 3rd, 2008, 07:59 AM
Come here!!!


Yeah my hair feels really awkward at this length! It has a really annoying tendency to go kind of triangular unless I go to the effort of smoothing it down loads. Other people's long hair pics have definitely been inspiring me today - I've been admiring them instead of writing the essay I'm supposed to be doing!

Thanks everyone! Xxx

I lost the "triangular look" after not much longer than you are. Now I can have as much volume as I want without worrying about that part! That's enough to keep me from chopping, that and the I really do like it better the longer it gets!

Bloodflower
November 3rd, 2008, 09:48 AM
I go through phases like that often. Everytime I see a thick hemline I get the urge to back to tailbone or even waist to achieve the same look. But then I tell myself that even if I cut I probably wouldn't wear my hair down often so it wouldn't make a difference. I then put my hair up and forget about my hemline.

So that's my advice: Put it up and forget about it. Have fun with updos. Then, after some time when you remember your hair, you'll be surprised at the progress you made.

lora410
November 3rd, 2008, 09:51 AM
Simply put it up and forget it exsist :)

angelthadiva
November 3rd, 2008, 10:01 AM
Okay, 2 ways to get past phases.

1. Invoke the 2 week rule. What’s the 2 week rule, you ask? The 2 week rule is whatever drastic thing you are considering (major chop, perm or color change) you HAVE to wait 2 weeks. Sometimes after a bit of thought, we might rethink our decision…When we make a rash decision, sometimes we later regret it. :(

2. Wear your hair up! If you are thinking of a chop and want to go shorter, wear it up and quit thinking or stressing about it. It will give the appearance of a shorter style, while protecting the length.

wintersun99
November 3rd, 2008, 10:05 AM
.................

Aisha25
November 3rd, 2008, 11:08 AM
I say just forget about it dont even think about hair cause the more you think the more you want to butcher them off and then youll just be sad. Concentrate on something else if you can, like well... you use your imagination;)

Islandgrrl
November 3rd, 2008, 11:25 AM
I wear it up so I don't get frustrated with it. I don't have to look at it or fuss with it or think about it. Makes me happy that way.

suicides_eve
November 3rd, 2008, 11:30 AM
i second the 2 week rule- put it back and forget about it.

after your 2 weeks if you still feel the itch you could do a mini cut - instead of getting a full blown chop- ask for LONG layers or change your hem line to a U or V

your hair looks fairly long so no since of doing it and regetting it later. from shoulder to BSL can take up to a year to grow back with little -no trims. just think of it that way:)

arylkin
November 3rd, 2008, 11:32 AM
I'd say to try to learn a few new updos and ways of styling (different types of braids, etc) and maybe to get a few new hairtoys to keep your hair exciting (remember- with every inch your hair grows it's easier to do more/different updos).

:)

LaurelSpring
November 3rd, 2008, 11:50 AM
If I get one of those moments I remind myself of the past moments when I cut it. I remember how I hated it after the first week and realized how boring it was and that I couldnt do anything fun with it. I hated it because it would take me so long to get back to where I was. If you do this enough times like I did the memory of how icky it was stays with you and the feeling is short lived. Looking at beautiful long hair pictures is really motivating also.

Euphony
November 3rd, 2008, 12:19 PM
I'm in one of those phases right now. But what always brings it on for me is a need for a change. I feel I'm frumpy, fat, and ugly - so I want a change. I do this every few years, the last time I did it I lost 90 pounds...so here's to hoping!

Generally the first thing I do is cut my hair off, it's quick, painless, cheap, and doesn't need me to do something daily to keep the change going. Well this time my hair is the longest I've ever had it, and it's in the best condition I've ever had it in - so I am NOT cutting my hair this time (well...okay I did cut it, but I'll explain in a bit). I bought a pretty skirt and a complimentary sweater that fits well, I bought some super cute knee high granny boots, I bought make-up. I'm actually wearing make-up and have been almost daily for a week now.

I'm still fat, but I feel better about me - so I don't feel the need to cut my hair off.

I went over the weekend and got my bi-annual 1/4" trim, and I had her cut about 6 or 8 inches off a very thin amount that used to be my bangs. It's still too long as I have a tough time separating it from my updo so I might cut a bit more off of it - not sure yet. I did separate it yesterday, put my hair up and got the "fringe" wet so it would spiral - it was cute but still pretty long.

But the good news is I don't feel like I need a change now (okay - except losing 100 pounds), and I do feel more attractive (though I could be extremely delusional :wink: )

Michou
November 3rd, 2008, 01:09 PM
I like Euphony's ideas. In the past I've gotten through haircut urges by focusing on something else I can change, like working on my fingernails for a week or so. Manicure, cuticle work, moisturizing all distracted me for long enough for the urge to pass.

Periwinkle
November 3rd, 2008, 01:22 PM
Put it up and pretend it isn't there. Alternatively, make a small change, like layers, a fringe or a colour change.

helen2806
November 3rd, 2008, 01:39 PM
Ok I'm definitely moving off the cutting idea after reading all your tips! I'll be busy making sure to take extra care of it anyway now it's winter Xx

Golden21
November 3rd, 2008, 05:13 PM
I really like this thread. I get this feeling, especially when I have little or no growth for a month. I need as many tips as I can get. The two week rule has been what has gotten me through since I started growing my hair out.

Nevermore
November 3rd, 2008, 09:58 PM
I recently had one of these phases and I avoided LHC like the plague. Why? Because looking at all this hair stuff just made me remember my own and wanting to chop it. I also instituted a one month rule, like the 2 week rule, but more extreme. I amassed pictures of pixie cuts and bobs. I talked to my partner about cutting my hair and what I'd do with it once I cut it. But I didn't do anything at all to my hair. That's the important thing, look and talk and imagine all you like, but don't do anything.

More recently, I've been wearing my hair in ponytails, so I can admire the color and wurly nature that I can't enjoy when it's up totally. I've also been washing it daily (CO), which means I don't have to plan washings or anything. I've taken the work out of it and I've been much happier with it as a result.

Shorty89
November 3rd, 2008, 10:02 PM
Simply put it up and forget it exsist :)I agree. Another thing is take a picture of it. Sometimes seeeing my hair from an "objective" view makes me appreciate how it looks when I want to chop.

Melisande
November 3rd, 2008, 11:45 PM
I get them too, these attacks of chopping temptation. When I do, I remind myself of the last time I had hair of the length I"m fantasizing about. How did it feel? What was I dreaming of then? Oh yes I remember: I dreamed about having long hair.

If you cut it, all you achieve is setting your clock back x months hair-wise. If your goal is long hair, then this is not a clever idea. If your goal should change, though, and you want to have a bob and NOT grow it, that's something else.

My desire for hair is deep rooted enough to resist.

Although I know that no other single action provokes so many compliments as a chop. People notice it, and people usually like it. I never get compliments for my long hair, and my weakness for compliments is the only real motivation for this fantasy of chopping the hair off.

Still: getting the compliment is a one-time-event. Growing the hair out again will take ages.

So no, I won't cut.

jojo
November 4th, 2008, 04:00 PM
. from shoulder to BSL can take up to a year to grow back with little -no trims. just think of it that way:)

try 2 years, well for me anyway!!!