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View Full Version : Frustrated (stalling)



CreatureBailey
July 10th, 2018, 12:33 PM
So, I feel like I've been around the same length for forever now.

In 2016 after I graduated I was at ''is it kinda tailbone yet'' and I can definitely say that my hair is longer today, so that's good. But since around a year ago my length hasn't been making much progress. I was taking pics from the back and showing people and it's around the same length still. The thing is, I can say my hair grows, because when I'd put my hair on the side, pin it to my body and look where it stops at, it was exactly aligned with the end of my bum. And then, months later, it was a couple inches past it.

But the thing is, the gain in length is also tapered. Like, those inches that were surpassing my last measurement were tapered. My hair is on the thinner side and I guess the taper most people get will show even more... so I tend to just trim that taper off... I let my hair grow for six months without trimming, but yesterday I just went and probably trimmed that six months progress because it was all taper anyway. And when I say taper, I don't mean a small difference with the rest of my hair, I mean... It's like nothingness. It's like a few hairs. So I just get rid of it...

Last fall when I was looking at my hair growth I'd imagine that by now I would be at a completely different place... Yet I'm not. I've been in the ''past tailbone but not really classic yet, well kinda classic-ish when I stretch it and hold it in place, but not fully surpassing that stage with certainty yet'' stage for EVER! My hair is not at the beginning of my bum, but it's not definitly over with that stage yet. It's past the middle. But I'm wondering, will it ever finally be over with that stage? I'm not gonna say my hair doesn't grow anymore, because it does... but it doesn't keep the fresh blunt cut (the one I have today) which is normal biology-wise, but it's so tapered that I feel like for ever inch that grows, I have to just cut most of it...

Is there something I'm doing wrong? I've been tryna sleep with my hair in a bun, not rubbing on anything, but the bun always undos itself. I have my hair in a bun when I'm at work and I'm at work a lot these days... and I never have my hair not attached. It's always in a braid or a ponytail.

When I stand straight and stretch my hair and manually place them on my body, it's past the middle of where it needs to be classic but not there yet. When I let go and just walk around, my hair is thin, there's not really much weight keeping it unravelled and down, so my hair just kinda sits on top of my bum and it looks like my length is only there, when in reality when I grab it and manually place it myself it's further. That's frustrating too, because I'm guessing it will take a remarkable amount of additional length for my hair to naturally cover my body and stay down on it, to/past classic. Like, even if my hair reaches that point, it will still keep being not heavy/full enough to actually visually display that it's at that point...

I feel like I'm never going to change of stage... :/ I'm going to start massaging my scalp everyday and this time stick to it to see if it helps... Other than that is there ways to avoid taper and make sure that the ends stay blunt longer?

nycelle
July 10th, 2018, 12:52 PM
I can't keep a thick hemline without regular trims, it just doesn't happen, and I don't have thin hair. For me to maintain a thick hemline, I'd have to trim it every 3 or so months, six is too long. You may just need to trim less, but more often.

Everyone's hair tapers at different lengths, but I think very few people have long hair with a thick hemline naturally. Maybe very thick curlies, or very straight, coarse hair. The rest of us in-betweens, need regular trims to get that look.

lapushka
July 10th, 2018, 02:34 PM
You can't say it stalled when you are trimming it constantly, right? :)

Maybe you need more frequent trims, but I wouldn't go overboard if you are so concerned with gaining length.

I mean look at my ends, and I purposely did that to it. ;)

Dark40
July 10th, 2018, 02:42 PM
I'm so sorry you are going through that. I know how frustrating stalling can be to the point of feeling like your hair isn't growing. I went through that a couple of months ago. I had grown to waist length ever since September of last year is when I reached, and for the last 7 months I had been stuck there. I was wondering if I was going through a resting or a stalling phase. I felt that my hair was going through a resting phase. Because, after my hair hadn't been trimmed nor S&Ded in 7 months my ends become feeling dry and rough. So, I S&Ded 1cm off, and after that it started growing again! Now, I'm creeping back down to almost waist length again! I'm going to see how far I go for the next 5 months. Or, until the end of this year.

MusicalSpoons
July 10th, 2018, 03:15 PM
How are you securing your buns and braids? If it's with hairties, then that will most likely be a big factor in thinning out your ends. Also ponytails are not protective, and at your length definitely enable a lot of damage. I speak from experience :flower:

Arciela
July 10th, 2018, 05:22 PM
To grow beyond TBL it really seems like keeping hair up in a protective updo is essential. I feel like I've been stuck there too for a long time, but I also trimmed a lot.

spidermom
July 10th, 2018, 05:29 PM
It may be that only a few of your hairs have a long enough and or fast enough growth cycle to get beyond tailbone. We all have a point beyond which our hair isn't going to grow, other than maybe a few rare hairs. I recall long ago an LHC member posting that she had one hair that was about 8 inches longer than the rest. It had been that way for quite awhile.

CreatureBailey
July 11th, 2018, 03:59 AM
I think I'll try putting my hair up with hair sticks (nautilus bun) most of the time. Also the elastics I use don't have a metal bar to it and are softer and gentler for the hair. Also I never tie it tight. :P

MusicalSpoons
July 11th, 2018, 06:01 AM
I think I'll try putting my hair up with hair sticks (nautilus bun) most of the time. Also the elastics I use don't have a metal bar to it and are softer and gentler for the hair. Also I never tie it tight. :P

I used ones without metal and they still wrecked my hair. Though it occurs to me you might be talking about the soft fabric ties rather than elastics, in which case yes they are much better than the elastics. However, a protective bun with a hairstick or fork will almost always be better than a style that exposes the lengths (i.e. braid, ponytail) :) (The only exceptions I can think of are if unbraided buns consistently fall out and/or provoke tangles.)

CreatureBailey
July 11th, 2018, 09:23 AM
Here's my hair taken this winter so you guys can see for yourselves :)

https://imgur.com/a/HSY3DlA

lapushka
July 11th, 2018, 09:53 AM
Here's my hair taken this winter so you guys can see for yourselves :)

https://imgur.com/a/HSY3DlA

That's a big taper; if you want thicker ends, and that is more important to you than length is ATM, then I would consider microtrimming. It will allow you to keep slowly growing but it will also (hopefully) thicken up your hemline, if that's what you want.

As mentioned before, I did it purposefully to my hemline by layering it up. So I don't mind it at all.

It is pretty!

MusicalSpoons
July 11th, 2018, 09:54 AM
Here's my hair taken this winter so you guys can see for yourselves :)

https://imgur.com/a/HSY3DlA

Posting a pic was a good idea! To be quite honest, from your descriptions of your hair I've read in some of your threads, I was slightly expecting it to look somewhat raggedy but instead it looks lovely! :flower:
I'm no expert so hopefully somebody with a bit more experience looking at different kinds of taper will correct me if I'm wrong, but to me that looks more like a natural taper than from damage. It actually reminds me of browneyedsusan's signature pic, in a way, and as I understand it her hair is in good condition. (So my previous comments, while not incorrect, are perhaps not so relevant to your situation.)

Is a period of no trimming, or minimal trimming (such as dusting literally just 1/4" off the ends every few months) something you might consider? That way, although you might not see much of a gain in thickness, you would have a better idea of how much more your hair can grow. It might simply be that you are closing in on terminal, as spidermom explained.

Rebeccalaurenxx
July 11th, 2018, 10:00 AM
The only thing I can suggest is trying micro trimming for the next year.
Cut about half your monthly growth every month. Or do a small trim.
Typically I cut about 1/4” - 1/2” every month because of my taper.
Do it for a solid year or so, and then see where you are or if the taper has improved.
Do make sure you give yourself time though, you need to do this for at least a year maybe two.
If fhe taper and length doesn’t really seem to improve in a year or two, I would suggest considering that you may have reached terminal. It’s unfortunate but some of us just simply can’t grow to certain lengths.
Have you measured your taper before? It visually looks like it tapers around hip on you but it’s important to measure the circumference down the length to really get an idea on where the most taper is.

CreatureBailey
July 11th, 2018, 11:09 AM
My hair had the exact same shape even back when it was at arm pit length though. Like, the way it ends in the picture and everything, it was the exact same even when it was past my shoulders and for every other stages too.

CreatureBailey
July 11th, 2018, 06:39 PM
Pics I took just today:

https://imgur.com/a/tXAuSMx

https://imgur.com/a/oOh4BhB

Btw the reason why my hair is reassambled/gathered together is because I manually gathered it together with my hand so we can see it better. Normally my hair is not just all together down my back like that it's just I made sure the ends were not scattered all over me so that we have a better idea of where it stops at

Also I don't have layers that's just my hair deciding to creates large waves on me and weird lighting.

Also maybe I should wear white clothes, I'll try that too :)