PDA

View Full Version : Funeral appropriate styling



cjk
April 11th, 2018, 07:20 PM
Toorrow night is a memorial service for a friend, he died in a tragic motorcycle accident and his widow is hosting something INFORMAL at a local church. Like polo shirts...decent but respectful.

I'm not sure what styles are considered funeral appropriate.

I can leave my hair down, which will blow around and end up looking messy but it is the simplest and most unadorned style. I'd bring a pocket comb.

I can gather it into a ponytail, secured with a large barrette. Looks rather nice, still simple, but decorative by guy standards.

Rope braids ponytail. One on either side of my head to contain flyaways, secured in the back. Probably with the barrette, again. It's a definite hairstyle, obviously arranged, shows some effort.

Twist. I can do a snug French twist, secured with a tortoiseshell or a black comb. Maybe the black...funeral.

A loose twist secured with an understated wooden fork. Very sculptural and flowy, looks nice with my beard. But very obviously arranged and reads as "fancy" even though it isn't.

Bun. I can now manage a small bun but it requires two sticks to secure reliably. My only sticks are chopsticks or steel nails. Looks nice, but again it's very expressive.

My instincts tell me to go simple and understated. But since longer hair is still new to me, I'm not sure where on that scale to land.

ursaV
April 11th, 2018, 07:28 PM
I vote the french twist, nice but subtle. I believe I've seen a pic around the forum somewhere and it looked neat. So sorry to hear about your friend. :(

lithostoic
April 11th, 2018, 07:49 PM
Your French twist would be great. Sorry for your loss.

Sarahlabyrinth
April 11th, 2018, 08:00 PM
Either a ponytail of French twist. Keep it simple :) Sorry to hear about your friend.

school of fish
April 11th, 2018, 08:09 PM
I feel you could go two ways here.

First - you could go with a neat and understated style. The barrette ponytail or the french twist would both fit that bill.

Second - you could go with whatever your friend would have most appreciated.

Whatever feels right to you will be the right choice. I'm so sorry for your loss.

cjk
April 11th, 2018, 08:18 PM
Thank you all for the sympathy. It's appreciated.

He was a bald and bearded old man who literally died having fun on his motorcycle. As ends go, a pretty good one. Even his widow thinks so. He died doing something he loved.

He and I did not particularly discuss hairstyles, other than a bit of ribbing about my looking like a hippie. LOL

This question is more an issue of general protocol.

mindwiped
April 12th, 2018, 12:05 AM
Thank you all for the sympathy. It's appreciated.

He was a bald and bearded old man who literally died having fun on his motorcycle. As ends go, a pretty good one. Even his widow thinks so. He died doing something he loved.

He and I did not particularly discuss hairstyles, other than a bit of ribbing about my looking like a hippie. LOL

This question is more an issue of general protocol.

Just me, if a friend joked about my hippie hair, I'd wear it loose. Just so that you have the happy memory of the laughter to make it through the more emotionally difficult time. But that may be girl logic, so if it doesn't feel right, do what does

lapushka
April 12th, 2018, 06:43 AM
My mom is needing to go to a funeral as well. Her cousin died of cervical cancer last week. She was 61.

That is why she cut and washed her hair this past Monday, the 9th of April and roller-set it (she only needs to monthly wash and it was last washed, cut and colored 29th of January, so high time). She can go a long time, and it still smelt freshly washed. Go figure! But she had a lot of build-up from hairspray in the front, so something needed to happen.

I think the French twist would be really neat for it, but that's my personal preference. Any style should be good, cjk! Please accept my condolences. :flower:

MidnightMoon
April 12th, 2018, 07:01 AM
I'd go with the ponytail, I guess because it's the most standard for men with long hair. A bit biker style also.

spitfire511
April 12th, 2018, 07:05 AM
Agreed with the understated vote - while it might look amazing in something more complicated, I personally never want to draw attention away from the purpose for being there in a situation like that (which sounds like you also sense and have well in hand!)

I'd go with a pony, similar braided style or down.

Many positive thoughts to you all through losing your friend - even when they go they way they'd have likely chosen, it's difficult for those left behind :grouphug:

zanelle
April 12th, 2018, 08:54 AM
If I were you, I'd go for a ponytail, but don't use a barette. Use something gentle, like a tie but without metal, preferably the colour of your hair.
If you really go for a barette try a classic black.
Or go for a French braid, or a twist.
I wouldn't let it down at your length

cjk
April 12th, 2018, 07:38 PM
The memorial was tonight. Black is not a color I have in abundance in my wardrobe.

This is what I came up with. Black French comb. Remember, casual but respectful memorial for a biker friend.

The balloon release was lovely.

https://i.imgur.com/1PCIzwo_d.jpg?maxwidth=640&shape=thumb&fidelity=medium

https://i.imgur.com/AUjRUSV_d.jpg?maxwidth=640&shape=thumb&fidelity=medium

https://i.imgur.com/VTvwSq7_d.jpg?maxwidth=640&shape=thumb&fidelity=medium

Sarahlabyrinth
April 12th, 2018, 07:40 PM
Oh, that looks very good, yes :D

zanelle
April 13th, 2018, 03:37 AM
Absolutely gorgeous!

Elly May
April 13th, 2018, 04:19 AM
Perfect, well done! And I am sorry for your loss....

lapushka
April 13th, 2018, 04:57 AM
Looked nice, cjk! Very nice!

school of fish
April 13th, 2018, 05:07 AM
Looks perfect, absolutely appropriate.

embee
April 13th, 2018, 05:30 AM
Good choice!

Sorry about your friend. There are many worse ways to go. I hope he never knew what hit him.

spitfire511
April 13th, 2018, 08:05 AM
Oh that couldn't have been more perfect. You looked wonderful!