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valkyrie90
March 16th, 2018, 12:44 PM
I hope you guys don't mind another "bitching about hairdresser " thread . I know I wrote a post asking about should or shouldn't I trim my hair just last night . And now here I'm bitching about the trim . Just bear with me .

So last night when I wrote that post I made up my mind not to trim my hair for a while . Then my friend ( a hairdresser ) called and I suddenly remembered that I asked her to come over and trim my aunt's hair and mentioned that I was thinking about trimming my hair . So she came to cut my aunt's hair and insisted on trimming my hair as well . I was like Umm I change my mind I dont wanna trim anymore... but she said come on , get on the chair , NOW, you REALLY need this trim ! . I asked her again and again if I really need it . She said sure your hair looks cow tail , all burnt and split and turn yellow-ish. So I moved to the chair feeling really bad about my hair already . My hair was bleached ages ago and yeah my ends have splits and yellowish and all but I thought it's not that bad as you hardly notice unless you look closely. And when I got on the chair my hair nightmare started . I told her that I want her to cut off 2.5 cm AT MOST . She rolled her eyes at me like I'm crazy and said you need to cut off AT LEAST 5cm to get rid of this cow tail. 2.5cm is nothing !!. We're friend and she came over to cut my hair I really appreciate that . I hate to let her down so I sat there quietly thinking hair is gonna grow back in no time. It didn't stop there . Once she touched my hair she asked when's the last time I wash my hair . I said I washed on Tuesday . She said that I should wash my hair more often becoz my hair looks really greasy . I told her I wash my hair once a week and not with shampoo so it might look different from the hair washed with shampoo but it's not greasy. She laughed and say ok ok not greasy . She made me feel like I'm weird and crazy and dirty and don't bother taking care of myself . I wonder if all the hairdresser talk **** about customer hair to get them to cut their hair? What she said even worse than the fact that she cut off at least my 4 months hair growth worth . I still feel bad . Anyways here is my before and after pic. How much of length you guys think I lost ? Idk exactly but I feel like it's at least 4 month of growth . And my ends STILL flippy. Maybe it's just the way it is. Idk...


http://i65.tinypic.com/11gqa1h.jpg

Suze
March 16th, 2018, 01:05 PM
Oh no!!! First of all, I just want to give you a big hug. I feel for you and the position you where placed in, that really sucks and I know it is very hard to stand your ground and say NO in situations like this. But for future reference you owe her nothing. It is your hair, nót hers and even though hairdressing is her occopation it does not mean she knows more about hair (I mean sorry hairdressers but you guys do use high heat on hair amongst other things) or that you have the same standards. I also think that the things she said to you where quite insulting. From now on I would just stick with self trimming and never look back.

I think your hair looks good though, but it also did before the cut.

ETA: Like a cows tail.....seriously?!

Sarahlabyrinth
March 16th, 2018, 01:17 PM
She was beyond the pale... seriously. Telling you your hair looks like a cow's tail? She should be out of a job, saying something like that to anyone, customer or not. I just told DH what she said to you and he said that if she had said that to him, he would have stood up and walked out immediately... I would have, too.

If it's any consolation, I love your hair in both photos, and to me it doesn't look much shorter... maybe it's the camera angle?

Your hair is absolutely gorgeous, and EVEN IF IT WASN'T, she should never have said that to you.!!!

Groovy Granny
March 16th, 2018, 01:24 PM
Wow, that was nasty :agape: ...friend or no friend...don't be pressured into someone making changes to your hair!

Your hair looked pretty before...and does after; flippy ends show you have some wurl potential there ...just accept it (I do too) ;)
It doesn't look like you lost much so don't dwell on it!

Keep doing all the great things you are doing for your hair...learn how to self trim (it is easy...if *I* can do it...you can) and enjoy your hair :cheer:

Ophidian
March 16th, 2018, 01:35 PM
Ooof I know the feeling and it's really hard not to let it get to you, especially when you have to make a decision on the spot and you have a literal voice in your ear saying things like that, which are a) wrong and b) rude.

Last time I went to a hairdresser with long hair, they held it up and said "ewww yeah we gotta get rid of this, it just hangs there like a curtain. Don't you use conditioner?" My hair was in good shape and did not look like a curtain when I think back on it but at the time I felt really bad and agreed to a pretty drastic haircut that I wouldn't have agreed to otherwise (and ended up hating, along with the conditioner he swore up and down I needed).

I think you did get lucky in that your hairdresser friend didn't take too much off at all and I think your hair looks really shiny and healthy both before and after.

Jo Ann
March 16th, 2018, 02:04 PM
I agree with Ophidian, Valkyrie90--with all the rude things your "friend" said, you got off VERY lucky!

MoonRabbit
March 16th, 2018, 02:11 PM
Does the ol' 'Customer's always right' just not apply to these people???? Don't they realize it is not an item like clothes that can be returned if we don't like the style? We end up having to live with their mistakes and on top of that getting insulted. AH does this make me mad.

nycelle
March 16th, 2018, 02:20 PM
Your situation isn't typical of most peoples because she's your friend AND stylist.
So I think she feels close enough to you to say whatever she thinks - there's no filter.

If you think she was out of line though, say something to her. Be honest and tell her how you feel, don't just keep it inside. Best to let her know if you want to stay friends. :flower:

Flowerness
March 16th, 2018, 03:03 PM
It sucks when people feel that it is okay to say whatever they want to other people, to do whatever they want. Lack of caring and understanding how it feels to be in someone elses shoes, maybe? I am so sorry that a friend said something like that to you, and you felt pressure to go against your own wishes. I don't see any damage on your hair, before or after, the color and shine are beautiful. Sometimes hair flips at the end due to texture, and hair type, not damage. You have truly exquisite hair. It is really beautiful, and if you want to grow it long it will be there before you know it!

Todd
March 16th, 2018, 03:25 PM
They ARE in the hair-cutting business you know. The more often they convince you that you need a trim, the more money they make.

I think its best to stay away! FAR away!

lapushka
March 16th, 2018, 03:41 PM
It doesn't appear to be *that* bad, judging from the stripes on your shirt (looks to roughly be about the same length). I'm sure that she was quite conservative, judging from what other hairdressers can possibly do to you. I think you were lucky and that you have a great friend in her even though she would have liked to have seen things differently (more washing, more length off).

I think she did a pretty good job. But of course, you can be the best judge of how much she actually cut off. And it's OK to be sad about any length you lost.

:flower:

spidermom
March 16th, 2018, 03:49 PM
I think your hair looks super-duper. Don't get hung up on how many months' growth you lost. Hair is funny that way - lots of growth one month, almost none another month. It looks like she gave you a very modest trim. Honestly, I can't even see the loss in length.

If you don't like what she's saying to you, speak up! There's no excuse for being rude, and there's no excuse for silently letting someone insult you.

lottiealice
March 16th, 2018, 04:17 PM
Awful attitude from a so-called friend, I'd be appalled. I realise they make their money from cutting and styling hair but to be so unnecessarily rude about your hair was unprofessional, even as a friend I can't imagine talking to mine like that. Constructively telling someone what you think if they ask is one thing (i.e, it's a little long than I'd like and perhaps a trim would help even out your hemline a little) but she put you in a really ****ty position. I'd tell her how uncomfortable she made you tbh, even if she didn't realise she still ought to apologise.

On the note of the hair itself, it looks gorgeous both before and after! It looks shiny (not greasy), healthy and strong to me. I'm not a hairdresser, but the length lost doesn't seem obvious at all to me - but then, I also know that even a tiny amount can feel like progress lost when you're growing your hair as seriously as a lot of us here!

lapushka
March 16th, 2018, 04:18 PM
If you don't like what she's saying to you, speak up! There's no excuse for being rude, and there's no excuse for silently letting someone insult you.

That is so true!

Next time just call her out on her being so rude to you (because let's face it, it was that).

Dark40
March 16th, 2018, 04:28 PM
I agree with what everybody said. She needs to be out of the job is right. She doesn't need to be do anyone's hair. Your hair looks fine in both photos. Your hair doesn't look like a cow's tail. I think it's beautiful.

Mlarmour
March 16th, 2018, 04:57 PM
Your hair looks beautiful before and after. As for her comments, i’d let her know she hurt my feelings because as a friend she should be considerate of that - if she’s not then she’s clearly no friend - and then I’d ignore them.
Reading some of these posts about hairdressers, i’m lucky with mine. She’s a friend of the family now, and the only person I trust with my hair. She trims just the very ends and has been super supportive in helping me to grow out my hair. The only time I can think of she’s commented on how my hair looks was the last time I got a trim because it took her longer than it has done previously to straighten my hair because it’s grown back way thicker than it ever used to be.

AutobotsAttack
March 16th, 2018, 06:08 PM
Judging by how healthy and lovely your hair looks in both photos, I’m detecting a hint of jealousy from so called “friend”.

Crystawni
March 16th, 2018, 06:54 PM
Hairdressers deal with all kinds of hair all the time, which helps them form an across the board opinion whether it's right or not, as the basis is muddied with accepted and learned hairdressing practices. As someone who's cut hair non-professionally for 35 years, I can say my old hairstyling ideals based on hairdressing methods (with occasional tutoring via hairdressers for updates along the way) were uneducated compared to what I've learnt here on LHC. Admittedly, the hairdressing industry is about freshness, tightness (artistic flow that's neatly cropped--oxymoron much?, or ragged but "done"), colour, shape and new-styling (+ the biggy: product sales), and just isn't geared towards health and retention that leads to growth. Referring to your ends as "cow tail" seems like such a regional/cultural way of looking at it, gotta say! It would make me want to swat her away with it as if she's a fly. :p I think your hair looks great, and is ready for some growth you can retain. Onwards and downwards!

Ophidian
March 16th, 2018, 06:56 PM
That is so true!

Next time just call her out on her being so rude to you (because let's face it, it was that).

I complete agree with this. As someone with an at times crippling level of social anxiety related self doubt though, I understand how hard it can be sometimes to actually do this in the moment when it counts. Not that this is everyone's experience of course! Just that if there is any level of second-guessing yourself or being anxious about speaking up involved, I get how fraught this seemingly obvious response can be. And props to those of who to whom assertiveness comes naturally (or has been cultivated to the point where it's second nature).


Judging by how healthy and lovely your hair looks in both photos, I’m detecting a hint of jealousy from so called “friend”.
Very good point.

cjk
March 16th, 2018, 07:20 PM
Every "hair cutter" I know, though I admit most of mine are barbers, get great satisfaction out of cutting off hair. It's fun for them. Transformation cuts in particular, but their idea of a slight trim is definitely different than what we might have in mind.

I'm glad you got out with such nice results and so much of your hair left.

Consider this a learning experience and move forward from here.

wannabe-rusalka
March 16th, 2018, 09:20 PM
Judging by how healthy and lovely your hair looks in both photos, I’m detecting a hint of jealousy from so called “friend”.

I was thinking the exact same thing! It didn't even look like valkyrie90 even really needed a trim but at least the after it looks like she did a decent job :/

longmane
March 16th, 2018, 10:17 PM
Judging by how healthy and lovely your hair looks in both photos, I’m detecting a hint of jealousy from so called “friend”.

I couldn't agree more.
valkyrie90, I remember seeing your before picture in another thread, my first reaction was :thud: It didn't look like you needed a trim at all. It is long and beautiful from root to tip, the polar opposite of what she called it. It tells years of treating it gently, taking well care of it consistently and not giving into the damaging hair trends. Also it looks shiny, not greasy. There are people who would want your hair but are not willing to put in the consistency and patience it takes. I can see how jealousy might come in.

valkyrie90
March 16th, 2018, 10:34 PM
Your situation isn't typical of most peoples because she's your friend AND stylist.
So I think she feels close enough to you to say whatever she thinks - there's no filter.

If you think she was out of line though, say something to her. Be honest and tell her how you feel, don't just keep it inside. Best to let her know if you want to stay friends. :flower:

Yeah I think it's exactly the case here. Becoz we're close so she doesn't mind speaking up her mind . She messes with me all the time but this time it was out of line . I will tell her about my feelings , hopefully it doesn't make her mad and we can stay friends


It doesn't appear to be *that* bad, judging from the stripes on your shirt (looks to roughly be about the same length). I'm sure that she was quite conservative, judging from what other hairdressers can possibly do to you. I think you were lucky and that you have a great friend in her even though she would have liked to have seen things differently (more washing, more length off).

I think she did a pretty good job. But of course, you can be the best judge of how much she actually cut off. And it's OK to be sad about any length you lost.

:flower:


Yeah I guess I was so paranoid and freaked out over the length she said she'd cut so I thought I lot A LOT of length lol. The 5 cm thing was just she messing with me I guess. I do trust her with my hair but she caused me a lot of anxiety and self-doubt this time. She might even think it's fun but it's not. * sigh*.




I think your hair looks super-duper. Don't get hung up on how many months' growth you lost. Hair is funny that way - lots of growth one month, almost none another month. It looks like she gave you a very modest trim. Honestly, I can't even see the loss in length.

If you don't like what she's saying to you, speak up! There's no excuse for being rude, and there's no excuse for silently letting someone insult you.

Thanks supermom , your hair looks super duper, too. I don't get a chance to see it at CL but i can imagine how gorgeous it was and still is.

As for with my friend, I will tell her what I feel trying to not make her feel bad. I recognized she did a good job and not so much length was off . She just cut the cow's tail part off as she said .

Thanks you guys for all your compliments and comments. I always find coming to TLC is the best way to boost my hair confidence and learn about hair. You guys are the best .<3

Groovy Granny
March 16th, 2018, 10:50 PM
Y
As for with my friend, I will tell her what I feel trying to not make her feel bad. I recognized she did a good job and not so much length was off . She just cut the cow's tail part off as she said .

Thanks you guys for all your compliments and comments. I always find coming to TLC is the best way to boost my hair confidence and learn about hair. You guys are the best .<3
Don't be too nice ;)

Not cutting too much off was lucky for you...but calling it a 'cow's tail' ?! :patrol:

I hope you are feeling better :flowers:

Stray_mind
March 17th, 2018, 02:44 AM
Wow, it was really unprofessional of her to say that your hair looks like a cow's tail. Even if she is your friend, when you come to her work, you are her Client first and foremost. That was hella rude and i would Never go back to a hairdresser like that.

She didn't seem to cut too much off, but i don't think your hair Needed that cut anyway. Judging from the pics your hemline looked just fine, and maybe a Tiny trim to even it up a little would have sufficed.

Seriously... A COW'S TAIL? I can't believe it :steam

Even My hairdresser Never said anything like that, except "I am happy you let me cut your hair" to me, even though we Both knew my hair looked AWFUL at that time at least down from the APL, because that's where all the chemical dye damage was left after i grew my hair.

Hairkay
March 17th, 2018, 05:16 AM
That was indeed rude and uncalled for. Valkyrie90, your hair looked beautiful before the cut and after the cut.

Dendra
March 17th, 2018, 05:57 AM
Your hair is stunning valkyrie! I actually think the cut looks pretty smart and neat, and just emphasises your hair's beauty.

Like others have said though, learn from this anxiety-ridden experience and put your foot down next time. I know it's easier said than done, but try.

ReptilianFeline
March 17th, 2018, 09:34 AM
I'm sligthly confused. Cow's tail? Isn't that the same as fairy tail ends put in a braid? What's wrong with that? Not all people have straight hair with a straight cut.

nycelle
March 17th, 2018, 09:53 AM
I'm sligthly confused. Cow's tail? Isn't that the same as fairy tail ends put in a braid? What's wrong with that? Not all people have straight hair with a straight cut.

I'm wondering if she meant "cowlick." That would make a lot more sense with straight hair.

valkyrie90
March 17th, 2018, 09:59 AM
Don't be too nice ;)

Not cutting too much off was lucky for you...but calling it a 'cow's tail' ?! :patrol:

I hope you are feeling better :flowers:

It's just she's also a great friend of mine. Saying annoying things to mess with me is her fav thing but this time she was out of line. I really want us to stay friends , though. So I will talk to her about it. She might think it's nothing rude about it but her cow tail and greasy hair comment really made me feel bad about my hair . But thanks to you guys now I feel so much better.


Wow, it was really unprofessional of her to say that your hair looks like a cow's tail. Even if she is your friend, when you come to her work, you are her Client first and foremost. That was hella rude and i would Never go back to a hairdresser like that.

She didn't seem to cut too much off, but i don't think your hair Needed that cut anyway. Judging from the pics your hemline looked just fine, and maybe a Tiny trim to even it up a little would have sufficed.

Seriously... A COW'S TAIL? I can't believe it :steam

Even My hairdresser Never said anything like that, except "I am happy you let me cut your hair" to me, even though we Both knew my hair looked AWFUL at that time at least down from the APL, because that's where all the chemical dye damage was left after i grew my hair.

Sometimes it's confusing that a stylist has good skill but bad attitude which makes your hair feels good but leave you feel like crap.

3 years ago when I haven't started this hair journey I came to a hair stylist who made my friend's hair beautifuly. I did something really terrible to my hair. I didn't detangle and comb it for so long that I couldn't remember . The ultimate benign neglect haha. It becoz it takes so much of time to detangle my tangly hair and it's painful too . So I threw it in a bun and forgot about it. Until it was all knotted up like a rat nest I decided to chop it off ( Yeah I was so bad toward hair ) . It took the hairdresser like 15 mins something to detangle my hair . He asked me what I did to my hair to make it look like a rat nest ? I didn't comb it for a while I said. Then he chopped of my hair without giving any comments about it. Later on I asked him to style and dye it but to my suprise he declined my request. " No matter how beautiful I do your hair , it will look a rat nest becoz you don't bother comb it. So just like this is enough. I felt like I was being drown in shameness. I just silently paid then left. He did a great job and what he said was true. So I think I deserved that. But now that I care a lot about my hair and try to make it better I still get the same result. That's what makes me sad the most. But I will still keep on and reach my goal. It's not just about hair , it's about self-care , self love and self-aware. It's about learning new things too .

valkyrie90
March 17th, 2018, 10:06 AM
I'm sligthly confused. Cow's tail? Isn't that the same as fairy tail ends put in a braid? What's wrong with that? Not all people have straight hair with a straight cut.

She said the ends are splits and turned to yellowish damaged look like a cow's tail . I think she really meant cow's tail.

leayellena
March 19th, 2018, 01:19 AM
Mom: how much do you chop woman?
Hairdresser: I have to remove your last perm in order to give your hair it's true shape.
Mom: woman, I have curly hair. Original, naturally curly hair.

My faith in any hairdresser is lost forever.


Every hair type works great with layers. Haha not mine. One word: cowlicks.

Wavy hair looks good short. It came out I do not have wavy just frizzy fine (and somewhat on the thicker side) hair.

Hairdresser on YouTube: meh boring straight frizzy hair. -> flat irons then curls it. LOL

TheForestFae
March 19th, 2018, 02:18 AM
I hope you guys don't mind another "bitching about hairdresser " thread . I know I wrote a post asking about should or shouldn't I trim my hair just last night . And now here I'm bitching about the trim . Just bear with me .

So last night when I wrote that post I made up my mind not to trim my hair for a while . Then my friend ( a hairdresser ) called and I suddenly remembered that I asked her to come over and trim my aunt's hair and mentioned that I was thinking about trimming my hair . So she came to cut my aunt's hair and insisted on trimming my hair as well . I was like Umm I change my mind I dont wanna trim anymore... but she said come on , get on the chair , NOW, you REALLY need this trim ! . I asked her again and again if I really need it . She said sure your hair looks cow tail , all burnt and split and turn yellow-ish. So I moved to the chair feeling really bad about my hair already . My hair was bleached ages ago and yeah my ends have splits and yellowish and all but I thought it's not that bad as you hardly notice unless you look closely. And when I got on the chair my hair nightmare started . I told her that I want her to cut off 2.5 cm AT MOST . She rolled her eyes at me like I'm crazy and said you need to cut off AT LEAST 5cm to get rid of this cow tail. 2.5cm is nothing !!. We're friend and she came over to cut my hair I really appreciate that . I hate to let her down so I sat there quietly thinking hair is gonna grow back in no time. It didn't stop there . Once she touched my hair she asked when's the last time I wash my hair . I said I washed on Tuesday . She said that I should wash my hair more often becoz my hair looks really greasy . I told her I wash my hair once a week and not with shampoo so it might look different from the hair washed with shampoo but it's not greasy. She laughed and say ok ok not greasy . She made me feel like I'm weird and crazy and dirty and don't bother taking care of myself . I wonder if all the hairdresser talk **** about customer hair to get them to cut their hair? What she said even worse than the fact that she cut off at least my 4 months hair growth worth . I still feel bad . Anyways here is my before and after pic. How much of length you guys think I lost ? Idk exactly but I feel like it's at least 4 month of growth . And my ends STILL flippy. Maybe it's just the way it is. Idk...


http://i65.tinypic.com/11gqa1h.jpg

Hi! First, just wanna say i'm Vietnamese too :v Hope that we can be friend together. But since we are still in this forum and i must follow the rule which is using only standard English so everyone else could understand, so yah... Anyway, I really really love your hair, in both pictures it look so amazing, with a person who (just) been through the whole bleaching and dying process, i would say that your hair looks good, i can't barely see any sign of damaged. The whole hair seems so smooth and healthy to be honest.
About the whole hairdresser things, i've been there too :( My mother's hairdresser used to insist me to let my hair for her to be trimming, I have told her that I just want to keep it as natural as possible, let it grow and since i don't see any problem with my hir, I'm fine to just let it be. But that woman just oh hell no baby girl, you shouln't let your hair grow too long because it will makes you look old fashion, nobody had long hair these day anymore, people prefer short hair! You don't believe me? And then she just open her phone, then show me a bunch of photos of Korean idols with short hair. And I was like as if! Like I would let you touch my hair. So she told my mother about it and try to convinced my mother that her daughter need this haircut so so badly!!! And the most unbelievable is... My mother then turn to and told me that just cut it anyway because the hairdresser seems make sense to her. I mean...WHAT?! And then the story end at the moment I have to go on the chair and let her cutting my hair because i just can't say no at that moment :( She took like 5cm of my hair and that a lots of hair since in back there, my hair is naturally healthy and didn't damaged at all. Just don't understand why she took 5cm of my long healthy hair for what :(((
So yeah, I really understand you, it just reminded me about my bad time with that hairdresser :( Luckily I've never get to see her again anymore because my mom has stopped to go there anymore. Yay!!!

Joules
March 19th, 2018, 10:03 AM
This situation is terrible not only because she's a hairdresser, but because she's also a friend! You may give advice to your friend if they ask you to, but being such a female dog is unacceptable.

This is the main reason I started self-trimming. In August 2010 I went to a hairdresser for the last time. It was 9 months after I started actively growing out my hair, before it was the same BSL for years and I was almost physically sick of it. I wanted long beautiful locks, and by that time I managed to grow my hair to waist. Also I should mention that prior to that my hair had been insanely dry due to way too harsh shampoos and way too light conditioners. When I started taking proper care of it it became softer and shinier, but the splits, breakage and taper was still there.

So. August 2010. I have waist-ish length hair for the first time in my life, and even though I know it's not perfect, I'm super proud. I decide to go to a hairdresser and trim just one centimeter to start a new school year with fresher ends. I go to my mom's hairdresser who knows me since I was six years old. I go to her because she always cuts off exactly how much you ask her. It takes her around 40 minutes to trim my hair, but the entire time she trashes my hair as hard as she can. She just won't shut up about the insane taper, the splits, she tells me three times about her daughter who cut her hair to shoulder length and loves it a lot. She points out to my mom how bad and ugly my hair is and basically what an abomination grows out of my scalp, she straight up tells me that I should be ashamed to wear it loose in public. I wasn't even going to wear it loose in public, I was all about those protective styles, but still. When my sweet mother tried to support me and asked her what I could do about it, the hairdresser was like "lol idk, maybe use oil on the ends". And by the way, my hair was in such an awful condition because of that b$#ch, she was the one who kept recommending me those harsh shampoos and good-for-nothing conditioners.

Yeah. My next trim was in my bathroom with manicure scissors, and this experience was so much happier and more satisfying.

valkyrie90
March 19th, 2018, 10:22 AM
Hi! First, just wanna say i'm Vietnamese too :v Hope that we can be friend together. But since we are still in this forum and i must follow the rule which is using only standard English so everyone else could understand, so yah... Anyway, I really really love your hair, in both pictures it look so amazing, with a person who (just) been through the whole bleaching and dying process, i would say that your hair looks good, i can't barely see any sign of damaged. The whole hair seems so smooth and healthy to be honest.
About the whole hairdresser things, i've been there too :( My mother's hairdresser used to insist me to let my hair for her to be trimming, I have told her that I just want to keep it as natural as possible, let it grow and since i don't see any problem with my hir, I'm fine to just let it be. But that woman just oh hell no baby girl, you shouln't let your hair grow too long because it will makes you look old fashion, nobody had long hair these day anymore, people prefer short hair! You don't believe me? And then she just open her phone, then show me a bunch of photos of Korean idols with short hair. And I was like as if! Like I would let you touch my hair. So she told my mother about it and try to convinced my mother that her daughter need this haircut so so badly!!! And the most unbelievable is... My mother then turn to and told me that just cut it anyway because the hairdresser seems make sense to her. I mean...WHAT?! And then the story end at the moment I have to go on the chair and let her cutting my hair because i just can't say no at that moment :( She took like 5cm of my hair and that a lots of hair since in back there, my hair is naturally healthy and didn't damaged at all. Just don't understand why she took 5cm of my long healthy hair for what :(((
So yeah, I really understand you, it just reminded me about my bad time with that hairdresser :( Luckily I've never get to see her again anymore because my mom has stopped to go there anymore. Yay!!!

Hello thereeee ! It's so good to find a fellow Vietnamese here . You know what's worse than going to a hairdresser ? That's going to hairdresser who IS your mom's friend WITH your mom . I've been there , done that too . Bad hair is inevitable. Luckily none of us has to be in that situation anymore. Thanks for your compliments . I've been growing my hair from a short bob to this length and it's quite healthy now ( split ends here and there but I'm working on it )

Stay with us and start your hair journey !

mz_butterfly
March 19th, 2018, 11:07 AM
Your *friend* isn't much of a friend. She sounds like a catty snot who wants to bully people into doing what she desires versus allowing people to live their lives as they wish.

Personally, I wouldn't let her touch a hair on my head, ever again. I doubt I'd speak to her often after her attitude either.

draysmir
March 19th, 2018, 11:40 AM
I'm sorry to hear about your experience. Your hair beforehand looked beautiful and did not need a trim at all in my opinion! All of her rude comments I would guess stem from jealousy, like a couple people mentioned. Your ends look nice beforehand and afterwards, I don't know where she could possibly see all these splits and a yellow "cow's tail", your hair is literally the complete opposite :rolleyes: To me it does look like she trimmed off how much she said she was going to, and while it's not super "drastic", it's still TWICE the amount of hair you wanted trimmed off. And you didn't even want a trim in the first place.

In my opinion, I think you should just grow your hair out from here since you have a nice full hemline, and avoid getting trims from your "friend" anytime soon. If you remember next time she is coming over to trim someone's hair, maybe just plan to be out of the house/area that day, so she can't pressure you into trimming again. You don't need to take this advice, but I would maybe find new friends if I were you. Someone who frequently (it sounds like) belittles you and makes you feel bad about yourself is not a healthy person to be around. Maybe letting her know how you feel will change her treatment towards you, it sounds she is a close friend of yours and hopefully will listen to you.

Your hair looks beautiful and the cut looks nice though, I'm sure it will grow back in no time :D

fhairyqueen
March 19th, 2018, 11:47 AM
That’s so awful I hate “friends” like that
Your hair looks lovely and thankfully she doesn’t appear to have ruined your gorgeous hair
I don’t understand why some people feel the need to try to dictate to others how their hair should be .... if you want it a certain way that’s that
Your hair is hair I could only dream of
Are you sure she isn’t just jealous of your hair ? I’d keep her away from it in future
Big hugs to you for the traumatic experience as I know what it’s like

cm006j
March 19th, 2018, 04:05 PM
I'm thinking about becoming a hairdresser. I would like to be a long-hair-friendly stylist and be someone you can count on to support long hair dreams!

lapushka
March 19th, 2018, 05:04 PM
I'm thinking about becoming a hairdresser. I would like to be a long-hair-friendly stylist and be someone you can count on to support long hair dreams!

That's a nice goal to have. :) You still have to go through all the conventional "wisdoms" though, like how to color, color-correct, cut short hair, etc. ;)

victorian girl
March 19th, 2018, 05:38 PM
It seems that everyone here is more angry at your friend than you are:) I'd say, maybe she was so rude with you because you're friends, so she thought she was being "frank" (that's how things usually are withfriends in my culture, hehe)... but honestly, she must've been looking at your hair in the microscope - there was no "cow's tail" or anything remotely like that. But believe me, 5 cm is not a huge amount of hair, especially with your already impressive length, and it will be back with you in no time! And I think you should talk to your friend about her manners - if she doesn't change, it will cost her clients, and no one wants it, right? (say her that too;))

Carolyn
March 19th, 2018, 07:56 PM
I really can't tell that it's much shorter. I'd say maybe an inch. You said she likes to mess with you and perhaps that's why she was saying all those mean things thinking she was being funny. I know I don't like any one joking about my hair or a trim. My hair is serious to me as I think yours is to you. I think what I would do is have a chat with her and tell her the things she said upset your and hurt your feelings. Then NEVER EVER let her trim your hair again.

TheForestFae
March 20th, 2018, 02:23 AM
Hello thereeee ! It's so good to find a fellow Vietnamese here . You know what's worse than going to a hairdresser ? That's going to hairdresser who IS your mom's friend WITH your mom . I've been there , done that too . Bad hair is inevitable. Luckily none of us has to be in that situation anymore. Thanks for your compliments . I've been growing my hair from a short bob to this length and it's quite healthy now ( split ends here and there but I'm working on it )

Stay with us and start your hair journey !

That's so true! I'm recently trying to grow my hair too, hope that 1 day I could have hair like you :))))

sarahthegemini
March 20th, 2018, 07:44 AM
Your 'friend' acts like a total b!tch and you're worried that confronting her will make her angry???

Death-Within-Me
March 27th, 2022, 12:21 PM
Ahahahaha, yeah this is definitely a culture thing.

Vietnamese people can be extremely...Blunt to say the least. At the expense of our tears and chagrin.

Too bad I can't see the pictures anymore.

Dark40
April 2nd, 2022, 10:35 AM
I agree with, Todd. They are in the hair cutting business, and they are all scissor-happy. I would stay as FAR away as possible! This is the main reason why I don't go to the salon or hairdressers today. Because, they are always trying to tell you your hair needs a trim, and it really doesn't.

I can tell you a story that there are these 2 women I used to work with on my job 12 years ago, and now they are always trying to tell me that I need a trim. Or, my ends are split and damaged just because it's a little frizzy. I have decided like you to not trim or cut my hair for a long long while now, and I just keep on ignoring those 2 women.