People touching your hair without permission!

[Spinder]

Anyone else ever had this happen? IMO, it's a huge, massive, colossal, major no-no. It is completely unacceptable to touch any part of someone else's body without their consent, and that includes hair. :nono:

I just got home from a trip to Cuba. Late in the evening a few days ago, I felt a little under the weather and wanted orange juice, but the dining room was closed by then, so I had to go to the bar in the lobby. As I was outside walking towards the lobby, I practically jumped three feet in the air when I suddenly felt a hand touching my head. I instinctively smacked it away and looked behind me to see a man who was clearly very, very intoxicated, trying to speak to me in Russian (which unfortunately I cannot understand at all). I ignored him and walked quickly to the bar, but as I'm pouring the juice, he comes up behind me again and starts creepily feeling my hair. Again I slapped his hand away, put down the pitcher, grabbed my cup, and literally sprinted back to my room as fast as I could, spilling most of the juice. I locked the door and didn't set foot outside again until late the next morning. Luckily, I didn't see him again.

When I told a friend about this, their response was "Wow, I was expecting something bad." Well, for me, it WAS bad, it was frightening and upsetting, and if it happened to you, I think you'd be very upset about it too. :steam

[Dark40]

Yes, that has happened to me a lot when I was a kid, and my hair was as long as Mid Back Length. Kids in my class would always touch my hair, and my mother would always tell me to tell them, "No, do not touch my hair!" "Hands off!"

[Suze]

Anyone else ever had this happen? IMO, it's a huge, massive, colossal, major no-no. It is completely unacceptable to touch any part of someone else's body without their consent, and that includes hair. :nono:

I just got home from a trip to Cuba. Late in the evening a few days ago, I felt a little under the weather and wanted orange juice, but the dining room was closed by then, so I had to go to the bar in the lobby. As I was outside walking towards the lobby, I practically jumped three feet in the air when I suddenly felt a hand touching my head. I instinctively smacked it away and looked behind me to see a man who was clearly very, very intoxicated, trying to speak to me in Russian (which unfortunately I cannot understand at all). I ignored him and walked quickly to the bar, but as I'm pouring the juice, he comes up behind me again and starts creepily feeling my hair. Again I slapped his hand away, put down the pitcher, grabbed my cup, and literally sprinted back to my room as fast as I could, spilling most of the juice. I locked the door and didn't set foot outside again until late the next morning. Luckily, I didn't see him again.

When I told a friend about this, their response was "Wow, I was expecting something bad." Well, for me, it WAS bad, it was frightening and upsetting, and if it happened to you, I think you'd be very upset about it too. :steam

That would upset me too. Because it is very invasive!

People always touch my hair too. Sometimes I really hate that and sometimes I love it. Like when my collegue does it and then asks how my hair can be this soft! But it is always people I now and not some creepy drunk stranger!

[AZDesertRose]

I used to have the problem of housemates treating my long braid like a bell-pull, tugging it to get my attention. NO! Say my name, tap my shoulder, do some other socially-acceptable form of asking for my attention. My braid is not a [many vile, profane, vulgar, as creative as possible expletives deleted] bell-pull! Do not tug it to get my attention, for crying out loud!

People I know touching my hair with my permission is a different story. My daughter sometimes likes to try styling my hair before attempting the same style on her own hair because sometimes it's easier to try a new style on not-one's-own-head, and she lets me do the same, experiment with her hair before trying a new style on my own. I've also allowed friends to style my hair; a friend at an SCA event put my hair in its first-ever crown braid, but she also had long hair and I trusted that she knew what she was doing.

Total strangers or even people I know touching my hair without permission get a very firm rebuke. They're lucky if they don't get smacked.

[MidnightMoon]

I hate it too. And it happens more in some cultures and apparently social classes too. I can only think how they're stuffing their germs in it, messing with my style, making it knot or plain just cursing it (not that I really believe in that but I don't think jealousy is healthy). I really appreciate people who ask me before if they can touch. They're also usually the ones to be more delicate about it and make it quick.

[lithostoic]

Yeah, especially in high school and extra-especially when I had (dread)locks. Started a fight with some punk-ass because he touched my lock and pretended it wasn't him.

(Also, I found this amusing, I read the title as "persimmon" XD)

[wispe]

Yes. It's jarring and intrusive, and I hate it. My friends and family I'm totally okay with touching my hair (especially if they ask!), but anybody else, nope. As an art student I did some volunteer work for an organization and met the woman who ran it again then next month at a gallery event. I wouldn't say she greeted me; rather she greeted my hair - by suddenly coming up behind me and raking her fingers through it while I was mid conversation with an artist whose work was on display. She then butted into our conversation to shake (yes, literally shake) my hair at this person (as if perhaps they hadn't noticed it was pink?); it derailed the conversation and I felt totally humiliated. I couldn't shake that upset feeling and ended up leaving shortly afterwards. I was so disappointed as it takes me a fair bit of psyching up to go to such an event and talk to people I don't know (I'm very introverted, and I get really anxious when I socialize).

[Siri]

I don't like people touching me anywhere on my body and my hair is part of my body so absolutely .... NO! :rant:

[Saige]

I get this a lot at work and I hate it! I get a lot of people pulling on my braid like a rope. I've even had someone run their hands over my braid with dirty gloves on (I work in a pathology lab), which was disgusting! I'm certain they wouldn't like it if I did this to their hair, so why do people think they have the right to do it to me? :mad:

[Lady Katherine]

Oh my, that is very scary, especially since he followed you! This happened a few weeks ago at work (retail), a random lady came up behind me and grabbed my hair! Complements are fine, but hair grabbing is not! That being said, I will let the coworkers I consider friend touch it, and my other friends and family. But they have to ask before!

[TheLuckyLurker]

"Wow, I was expecting something bad"... Does your 'friend' not think being accosted by a strange, drunken man is bad? (I put quotes around friend because even if they don't think hair touching is a big deal, you were obviously upset and scared by it, and it wouldn't have cost them anything to be sensitive to that)

[Seeshami]

Yes they do. Generally while apologizing for doing so. And when I care I wear it up. When I don't I wear it down, I stopped being upset for the attention (apart for the lady rubbing it on her face) when I realised that I was asking for it by wearing my hair down. I am also a performer though. I belly dance and accept people hooking money in my belt and straps. I cannot justify treating them differently because if anything petting me is a lot less offensive than trying to stuff money in my bra.

P.S. It doesn't justify societies issues. But is a societal problem that is endemic. People with tattoos face the same weird petting compulsion.

[pailin]

Strangers, yuck. I agree with you. And I really like people playing with my hair- people I know and like, with clean hands. Girls. A guy touching my hair- better be a significant other; to me at least, it's too intimate for a man that I'm not in a relationship with.

[Borgessa]

Pregnant belly syndrome, everyone feels they have a right to touch it, just cause its there.

[CrowningGlory]

Pregnant belly syndrome, everyone feels they have a right to touch it, just cause its there. I immediately thought of this when I started reading this thread. I found it inexplicable that friends thought they had a right to touch my belly (men included) because it was suddenly expanding. I've not had any problems with adults touching my hair (I work with young children and you can't get upset about them touching your hair or other parts of your body - in fact it's often their way of showing trust and connection) but would feel the same sense of violation that I did when people used to touch my belly.

[ephemeri]

That is terrifying and I'm very sorry you had to go through that!

I'm very not ok with people touching my hair who aren't my husband. For one thing, I don't trust them to have clean hands. For another, I don't know what they might do. What if they start yanking? Or something worse? No thanks....

[Fru fru]

Yes, this often happens to me. I wear my hair down a lot because I get headaches wearing it up. People seem to compliment my hair and give it a yank at the same time like it's not attached to my head and I won't feel it :rolleyes:

[marvel-lover]

I can't stand the feeling of men touching me (PTSD) and the last time a man touched me (hair included) without my permission, I almost cracked his jaw. My knuckles were bruised for a solid week, and I felt kind of bad because it was a panic-induced reflex, but don't touch me without my permission.

[Hairkay]

It's very rare that this happens to me. When I was about aged 9 in school there was this one girl with classic length type 1 hair that used to pull all the girls's hair. The teacher talked to her about it. It turned out that in her previous school everyone would pull her hair because it was so long. She decided to retaliate and this habit stuck with her. She stopped. In my teens when I stood in line a few girls would tug at my hair just to see the boing action when they let it go. Then next time I recall is when I was in college and suddenly this woman touched my hair and exclaimed that is was soft in shocked voice. I'd worn it in a half pony tail/puff and it was big and loose. She had type 1b hair and her husband had type 4 hair. Her toddlers had type 3 hair so I wondered why she should be fascinated by my hair. Other times it's just be curious little hands of children. The last time that happened I heard "Ooh, curly hair!", yes she tugged and watched the plait bong back up.

[Kat]

When I told a friend about this, their response was "Wow, I was expecting something bad." Well, for me, it WAS bad, it was frightening and upsetting, and if it happened to you, I think you'd be very upset about it too. :steam

YES it's bad. Not only did a stranger touch you without permission, but when your response was negative (to the point of a violent reaction; there's no mistaking that as anything but "do not touch me"), he not only didn't stop, but *followed* you to do it again. That is not only a disregard for your wishes and autonomy, but frankly frightening-- a message of "I don't care what you want, and I will (and can) do whatever I want." It would be upsetting even from another woman, but from a person probably larger and stronger than you are, who clearly isn't in full control of their faculties (drunk)... yes, it is frightening.



When I don't I wear it down, I stopped being upset for the attention (apart for the lady rubbing it on her face) when I realised that I was asking for it by wearing my hair down.

Nope. Someone doesn't get to touch a part of another person's body just because it's there, or noticeable, or attractive, or unusual. And you are never "asking for it" just because you don't have your hair slicked down tight to your head. I don't want other people touching me without permission, period, and they don't get to decide if they have a right based on what I am wearing or how I am wearing it.

[Fru fru]

Nope. Someone doesn't get to touch a part of another person's body just because it's there, or noticeable, or attractive, or unusual. And you are never "asking for it" just because you don't have your hair slicked down tight to your head. I don't want other people touching me without permission, period, and they don't get to decide if they have a right based on what I am wearing or how I am wearing it.[/QUOTE]

Totally agree with this!

[Cherriezzzzz]

Having my youth spent as a hairdresser I get to touch ALL the beautiful hair :) but all joking aside... being a natural redhead... I got mine touched all the time. No one does it anymore though. My daughter has my red but with hot roller bouncy shiny (insert every word for desirable hair here) long hair. Literally no one has ever yet touched her hair without permission. She's the epitome of "sassy/firey" redhead personality. I honestly think she'd bite someone... and she gives off the vibe of "do not touch me. LoL I feel sorry for the person who tries to touch her hair LoL One time at Wal-Mart she was sitting in the shopping cart looking like a little doll baby and a sweet old couple saw her and smiled and pointed her out. They smiled at me, enjoying her beauty. I smiled back as always, but the poor unsuspecting old man decided to say hello to my daughter... She starred him down in silence for a few moments, not smiling, and yelled as loud as she could, "Bull hog!" He jumped out of his skin and backed up... I apologized to him, but in his wisdom he said it was ok she didn't know him and he was sorry... I reminded my daughter she's allowed to be polite and say hi back, especially since I was right there and he wasn't even within arms length of her. But still, ladies, I think a nice loud "Bull Hog!" shall do the trick with unwanted hair attention :D

[Kat]

Having my youth spent as a hairdresser I get to touch ALL the beautiful hair :) but all joking aside... being a natural redhead... I got mine touched all the time. No one does it anymore though. My daughter has my red but with hot roller bouncy shiny (insert every word for desirable hair here) long hair. Literally no one has ever yet touched her hair without permission. She's the epitome of "sassy/firey" redhead personality. I honestly think she'd bite someone... and she gives off the vibe of "do not touch me. LoL I feel sorry for the person who tries to touch her hair LoL One time at Wal-Mart she was sitting in the shopping cart looking like a little doll baby and a sweet old couple saw her and smiled and pointed her out. They smiled at me, enjoying her beauty. I smiled back as always, but the poor unsuspecting old man decided to say hello to my daughter... She starred him down in silence for a few moments, not smiling, and yelled as loud as she could, "Bull hog!" He jumped out of his skin and backed up... I apologized to him, but in his wisdom he said it was ok she didn't know him and he was sorry... I reminded my daughter she's allowed to be polite and say hi back, especially since I was right there and he wasn't even within arms length of her. But still, ladies, I think a nice loud "Bull Hog!" shall do the trick with unwanted hair attention :D

I just about fell over laughing. I need to try this some time. Just look at them, deadpan... suddenly yell... and then immediately return to calm deadpan as if nothing ever happened. HAHAHAHAAHHA

ETA: Okay, I posted this, went to another tab for a few minutes... came back, and read your quoted post again. And cracked up again.

[Cg]

If some imprudent soul made that mistake with me, he would do it only once. I may be a little old lady but I'm far from defenceless.

[Fairyfern]

I hate when this happens! Big part of why I cut my hair short last year, a few times people would stroke the length of my hair as they got off the bus a most of the time I didn't even see their face- always felt so wrong!

[Aunt Rapunzel]

When I don't I wear it down, I stopped being upset for the attention (apart for the lady rubbing it on her face) when I realised that I was asking for it by wearing my hair down.

Oh, I feel completely differently. Whether I wear my hair up or down, nobody has the right to touch any part of me without my permission.

And yes, this has happened to me before, too. I was standing at the grocery store reading the bulletin board when I felt an unfamiliar hand stroking the length of my hair. :thud:
I turned around, too shocked to say anything, and I just stared at him with what was likely a horrified expression. He didn't seem to notice, and said, "You have the most beautiful hair I've ever seen!" Just then my brother (who happened to be in the military) came up, and the man quickly left. It IS an awful experience to have a stranger stroking a part of your body. I'm more feisty now and would have a far different reaction. But at the time I was terribly shy, and couldn't react quickly enough.

[Kat]

Oh, I feel completely differently. Whether I wear my hair up or down, nobody has the right to touch any part of me without my permission.

And yes, this has happened to me before, too. I was standing at the grocery store reading the bulletin board when I felt an unfamiliar hand stroking the length of my hair. :thud:
I turned around, too shocked to say anything, and I just stared at him with what was likely a horrified expression. He didn't seem to notice, and said, "You have the most beautiful hair I've ever seen!" Just then my brother (who happened to be in the military) came up, and the man quickly left. It IS an awful experience to have a stranger stroking a part of your body. I'm more feisty now and would have a far different reaction. But at the time I was terribly shy, and couldn't react quickly enough.

I might do this, too. Sometimes I am so shocked by something someone says or does that I stand there frozen in disbelief and only think of the perfect thing to say/do five minutes later... too late.

[Ligeia Noire]

I hang them all by the toes.

[enting]

Oh the curl boinging!
But it was pretty much only ever my friends or someone in the same class who was sitting near me. It usually happened right after I washed my hair, when my hair was clearly curly, not a pile of frizz, and I would get annoyed because boinging the fresh curls would frizz them. It was never a complete stranger on the street. I don't know what I would do if a total stranger touched my hair without permission but I would definitely feel violated!

[amiraaah]

well,i felt like i should tell you this accident.my friend was in the underground and a random girl chopped her hair off to BSL from behind,i don't know how but my friend just realized after getting out when she wanted to put her hair up in a ponytail and imagine her reaction:(.this story is very popular my friend just talked about it in some channels on tv

[MoonRabbit]

well,i felt like i should tell you this accident.my friend was in the underground and a random girl chopped her hair off to BSL from behind,i don't know how but my friend just realized after getting out when she wanted to put her hair up in a ponytail and imagine her reaction:(.this story is very popular my friend just talked about it in some channels on tv

WHAAAAT?!?! shudder:

[amiraaah]

we think the girl who did so was a strict muslim don't get me wrong or something,i'm a muslim too but i don't cover my hair and will never do it.

[LaLola73]

Holy cow what is the problem that people think they can touch a stranger's hair (or worse, cut it off)! Such a lack of manners and boundaries.
I hope no-one does it to me if I wear it down when it gets long. I don't know what I would do.

[littlestarface]

we think the girl who did so was a strict muslim don't get me wrong or something,i'm a muslim too but i don't cover my hair and will never do it.

Well it could have been anyone, best not to assume who it might have been.

[amiraaah]

LaLola73 i was really shocked when that happened,but people feel like they can act like god and judge people freely.

[amiraaah]

of-course it can be anyone but here most of girls cover their hairs and it was in muslim-brotherhood period.

[Robi-Bird]

WHAAAAT?!?! shudder:
I cannot imagine someone doing that to me. I think I would lose my ****.

[amiraaah]

i swear my friend cried all day and was in a very bad mood for a long time.

[MoonRabbit]

i swear my friend cried all day and was in a very bad mood for a long time.

I bet! How long was your friends hair before this terrible assault? Honestly, I would be so furious and would hunt that person down even if it took my entire life. I'm getting so heated just thinking about that person waiting around with a pair of scissors, looking for a victim.

[amiraaah]

I bet! How long was your friends hair before this terrible assault? Honestly, I would be so furious and would hunt that person down even if it took my entire life. I'm getting so heated just thinking about that person waiting around with a pair of scissors, looking for a victim.

it was a little longer than hip length.

[Garnetgem]

Yes i have had people touch and they even tug at it..i no longer wear it down in public as it became too much all the touch and tug gave me a sore scalp..but of course not just the physical pain but its the shock of it being tugged by strangers,its now at classic so of course it is easy to be grabbed/touched..not sure why anyone thinks its okay to touch a stranger never mind follow and yes i have had a follow a few times one was by a man who pressed himself against my hair and my body as he followed..it was an invasion of my space i felt threatened that time...scared me so i can understand how you must have felt..sorry it happened to you its something that sticks in our minds for a long time...

[Garnetgem]

well,i felt like i should tell you this accident.my friend was in the underground and a random girl chopped her hair off to BSL from behind,i don't know how but my friend just realized after getting out when she wanted to put her hair up in a ponytail and imagine her reaction:(.this story is very popular my friend just talked about it in some channels on tv

Shocking and so cruel..

[amiraaah]

Shocking and so cruel..

yes it sounds like hurting someone's body part hair is a body part too:(

[maborosi]

Yes. It is really frightening for me if I don't expect it.
It happens occasionally, and I have a very sensitive scalp, so it's doubly rude for me.

[Serimel]

This is such a nightmare thread. I will never go out again. :couch:

[samanthaa]

I've never really had anyone touch my hair unexpectedly and never knew how I would feel about it...until recently, when my mom decided to grab/yank my hair unexpectedly. I had such a sudden, almost violent reaction (i.e., slapping her hand away and snapping verbally)! I couldn't believe how upset it made me--and that was just my mom!

[truepeacenik]

At a concert this weekend (two nights) I had sooo many people just reach out and touch.
Everything from a pat on the head to stroking.
They are saying nice things, or are really, really spun and might not know what they are doing, or what it really is that they are touching.

I'm resigned to this with a bunch of tripping hippies, it's a "Dead" show, after all, but it seems the older I get, the more likely people are to touch longer.
Luckily, they are easily led to a new fascination.

[Aredhel]

It doesn't bother me that much, but it does make me feel a little uncomfortable when people touch my hair without my permission. It's just weird. Like why do you need to pet me, I'm not an animal!:kitten: I'd at least appreciate if people would ask first so that I can have the opportunity to say yes or no.

[M.McDonough]

It could have been worse. Believe me and your friend.

[Katia_k]

I've never really had a total stranger touch my hair. I've had a few acquaintances do it, and it's a little weird, but also is usually just some petting from the desk behind me, and I deal. If a random stranger did it, that would make me feel suuuuuuper violated. And I already get enough of that; for some reason, like having long hair, being blind makes random strangers feel they have the right to grab/touch you out of the blue if they are "helping" you. I can't count the number of times I've been grabbed by a silent stranger when I've gotten on the bus...makes my skin crawl. Am, unfortunately, usually too midwestern to say anything.

[MoonRabbit]

I was telling my mom about this thread..well mostly the creepy chopper story :couch:, She replied " OH I believe it, once when I had knee length hair, as I was walking down the street, some people were walking behind me, and it wasn't until later on that I discovered they had thrown gum all through my hair.


I can't....I just can't understand people.

[EssentialJo]

I was telling my mom about this thread..well mostly the creepy chopper story :couch:, She replied " OH I believe it, once when I had knee length hair, as I was walking down the street, some people were walking behind me, and it wasn't until later on that I discovered they had thrown gum all through my hair.


I can't....I just can't understand people.

I groaned/cringed when I read this. What a *horrible* thing to do to someone. And why??? And for the OP, what a creepy disgusting man! My hair has never been long enough to invite so much attention. I don't know what I would do in those circumstances.

[enting]

This thread makes me even more sure that I always want to wrap up my hair when I go outside. Every once in a while I toy with the idea of going out with it down, but then remembering threads like these make me go NOPE.

[Serimel]

This thread made me remember one of the girls from a martial art club in my youth. She had gorgeous way past classic length black hair. One day that girl and one other club member went to some outdoors festival. The long haired one had packed scissors with her and went cutting pieces of other people's hairs behind their backs. They both thought it was funny and they were telling this story to us laughing. So mean! You would think a long haired person would have more empathy towards other people's hair. As a teenager I didn't criticize them due to the strong will to bond and be friends with them. These days I would know better...

[Garnetgem]

When i was in school the kids on the school bus used to set fire to peoples long hair when they sat behind them..many lost length them days.

[Garnetgem]

Even wearing a braid is not safe from hands either one time a man who was maybe in his 60's gave my long braid a rough hard tug..when i got home to undo my braid i was shedding so yeah like i said rough tug..

[Kat]

When i was in school the kids on the school bus used to set fire to peoples long hair when they sat behind them..many lost length them days.

They're lucky that's all they lost! Having hair on fire can end really badly! I've heard stories-- most of them here-- of people with severe burns on their heads and faces. I can't believe this was tolerated.

[Ephemeron]

Due to my thick bun, I've had people come up behind me and grab my bun and shake my head with it! I love when people play with my hair but only with express permission. Nothing makes me angrier than people touching my hair without asking.

[amiraaah]

i'm so sorry girls,i wanted just to warn you and didn't mean to frighten you.

i apologize and please accept my apology :)

[JadedByEntropy]

I get braid squeezers all the time. my harsh taper past waist doesn't help, but i can always tell the offenders who do it often...because they lift&squeeze thinking if they don't tug it i won't notice that huge weight vanishing. ~.~

But at a festival i had a friend (girl) tell the guy standing next to me not to touch my hair. (he wasn't going to) We all knew each other, and he was adamant he had learned his lesson from doing it to someone he didn't know earlier not to do it ever again xD

[Robi-Bird]

I have never had anyone anyone touch my hair without asking, except for my nieces but only when they were very little. That said when I am in transit, I keep my hair in front of me so it's not like anyone has really had the opportunity.

[AZDesertRose]

I have never had anyone anyone touch my hair without asking, except for my nieces but only when they were very little. That said when I am in transit, I keep my hair in front of me so it's not like anyone has really had the opportunity.

Little children who haven't learned better manners are a different story; it's still annoying, but in my book, it's a little more understandable than older children/adolescents or grown adults who should know better than to touch another person without permission, as with the braid-bell-pull thing I groused about earlier in the thread. The people who were doing that to me were well and truly grown and should have known better, which is part of what irked me so badly about the whole thing (that, and it wasn't exactly comfortable to have my head yanked backwards unexpectedly!).

[littlestarface]

OMG I just had this happen to me last night at work. I never had anyone touch my hair before only my boyfriend but last night I was folding clothes and I felt someone tug my hair 3 times in a row as someone walked past me and she said "your hair is so beautiful" then she came to the side of me and thank goodness it was one of the store managers but still, it was quiet scary LOL!

[Robi-Bird]

Little children who haven't learned better manners are a different story; it's still annoying, but in my book, it's a little more understandable than older children/adolescents or grown adults who should know better than to touch another person without permission, as with the braid-bell-pull thing I groused about earlier in the thread. The people who were doing that to me were well and truly grown and should have known better, which is part of what irked me so badly about the whole thing (that, and it wasn't exactly comfortable to have my head yanked backwards unexpectedly!).

Oh It was definitely annoying but at 3 and 5 they have both long learned that Auntie's hair is not a toy. Maybe it's depressing that adult seem to have an issue with this, based on the stories on this thread.

[AZDesertRose]

Oh It was definitely annoying but at 3 and 5 they have both long learned that Auntie's hair is not a toy. Maybe it's depressing that adult seem to have an issue with this, based on the stories on this thread.

Yeah, it's fairly easy to teach even young children that pulling someone's hair hurts and isn't a nice thing to do ("You wouldn't like it if someone pulled your hair, because it hurts, right? So please don't pull Auntie's hair anymore, because it hurts Auntie when you do it," is an explanation that will get through to most children even at 2.5 years of age or so). It's super annoying when people who are way past old enough to know better don't seem to have gotten the message.

[MoniLein]

As an adult I (thankfully) haven't had my hair touched by a stranger - my husband does it (but that's ok for me).

As a child (I was a natural light blond back then) when we were on holliday in Italy, my hair was touched by strangers quite often (about 30 years ago) - they were checking if my hair was dyed (at least that's my mom's theorie). I just remember being annoyed by those unwanted touches and that they mispronounced my name all the time :rolleyes:


As for the OT post: a no has to be accepted (and it is quite frightening when it is not - I would have fled too)

[nat_brunette]

Anyone else ever had this happen? IMO, it's a huge, massive, colossal, major no-no. It is completely unacceptable to touch any part of someone else's body without their consent, and that includes hair. :nono:

I just got home from a trip to Cuba. Late in the evening a few days ago, I felt a little under the weather and wanted orange juice, but the dining room was closed by then, so I had to go to the bar in the lobby. As I was outside walking towards the lobby, I practically jumped three feet in the air when I suddenly felt a hand touching my head. I instinctively smacked it away and looked behind me to see a man who was clearly very, very intoxicated, trying to speak to me in Russian (which unfortunately I cannot understand at all). I ignored him and walked quickly to the bar, but as I'm pouring the juice, he comes up behind me again and starts creepily feeling my hair. Again I slapped his hand away, put down the pitcher, grabbed my cup, and literally sprinted back to my room as fast as I could, spilling most of the juice. I locked the door and didn't set foot outside again until late the next morning. Luckily, I didn't see him again.

When I told a friend about this, their response was "Wow, I was expecting something bad." Well, for me, it WAS bad, it was frightening and upsetting, and if it happened to you, I think you'd be very upset about it too. :steam


I definitely think a stranger coming up and touching my hair is weird.... But even if I know someone only a little, I like for people to touch my hair. Again I know you're talking about strangers which is weird.

My hair isn't quite long enough to spark interest in people who don't know me. When I was younger though, I had hair to my waist and girls would come up to me all the time, not always knowing me too well, and would start playing with my hair. I always thought it was a nice compliment and felt lovely.
But I wasn't loved as a child so maybe that's why.

[twill]

The only strangers I can recall touching my hair were small children. It's quite possible it's happened and I've just forgotten about it.

[SnowDancer]

This happened to me for the first time the other day at work. I have to put my hair up for work and ended up doing a pretty fluffy ponytail the other day and my coworker walked by me and started cupping my fluffy hair. I was pretty surprised since that's never happened to me before.

[mistythebandit]

Yeah, people touching you at all without your permission is really annoying.