My journey has begun! Super damaged hair ready to be babied.

[kickrz22]

I hate posting again -- I feel like I need a lesson in hair or a hair coach.

Looking to create a new hair routine and help figuring things out along the way.
No heat is a given and so far so good.
I even stopped using my brush and comb, so far finger combing works just fine.

Purchased some new shampoo and conditioner and leave in all
Live Clean exotic nector argan oil

Yesterday was the first day styling my hair without heat (I for years have been flat ironing straight) and I have straighter hair on top and curly underneath so trying to embrace the wave I needed to use more product than I liked to :( Kinda crunchy :/
Today I have no idea what to do...lol. It's still crunchy and not sure if I should wash it again (washed yesterday and the day before) or if I can "fix" it and what is the most gentle way to fix it.

I picked up Marc Anthony strictly curls mousse, herbal essences totally twisted curl scrunching gel and marc anthony defrizzing coconut cream curls. One of them HAS to give me good curls without too much crunch.

Last purchase was the aussie 3 minute miracle moist - how often would I need to use something like that? Apple cider vinegar too!

I also have coconut oil - should I warm that up at all? and how often would I use that?

I think I am armed with what I need just need help getting my routine down and I have had the most amazing help here for you all. I feel like you all will help me get back what I damaged so bad!

Thank you!

[Reyesuela]

Coconut oil melts in your hands when they aren't icy cold. A VERY little goes a long way.

[Aredhel]

Everything new that you're experimenting with, I'd really recommend trying one at a time (one a week or every 2 weeks). Certain things may or may not work for you, and it'll be hard to pinpoint which is good or bad if you try everything at once! This happened to me when I was so eager to get a good routine going that I tried 3-4 new things in one week. :o Just take it slow and experiment with caution. :)

[kickrz22]

Everything new that you're experimenting with, I'd really recommend trying one at a time (one a week or every 2 weeks). Certain things may or may not work for you, and it'll be hard to pinpoint which is good or bad if you try everything at once! This happened to me when I was so eager to get a good routine going that I tried 3-4 new things in one week. :o Just take it slow and experiment with caution. :)

So change just my shampoo first? then change conditioner after that?
I am really hair challenged and trying to learn!

The curl stuff I didn't plan to use all but I live in the country and don't go into town as much so just bought a few to see which would give me less crunch!

[Reyesuela]

Exactly! :)

[lapushka]

So change just my shampoo first? then change conditioner after that?
I am really hair challenged and trying to learn!

The curl stuff I didn't plan to use all but I live in the country and don't go into town as much so just bought a few to see which would give me less crunch!

Yes, one thing at a time. It is safe to use a new shampoo (but didn't you get itchy with regular shampoo?) and then see what that gives. If that doesn't work out, please go back to your H&S. Then change your conditioner, and so on and so forth. It will be hard enough with the change of "no heat" so try and get past that first!

[kickrz22]

Yes, one thing at a time. It is safe to use a new shampoo (but didn't you get itchy with regular shampoo?) and then see what that gives. If that doesn't work out, please go back to your H&S. Then change your conditioner, and so on and so forth. It will be hard enough with the change of "no heat" so try and get past that first!

I did get itchy but I am not sure if that is because I left it too long and it was itchy before I washed it. I wanted to at least try a sulphate free and if it doesn't work then I know.

I am good with no heat if I can just get these flatter top pieces to curl! It is crazy how much curl I have underneath that I never really knew existed.

So if I am ONLY changing shampoo to start does that mean I shouldn't being using the leave-in at all? What about the curl stuff - I do need to style it or its just a frizzy mess.
Or just the shampoo change on scalp? the rest are more for my ends so would that be ok?
I really do want to thank you lapushka you have given me such great advice on all my posts <3
A lot of you have helped me so much -- thanks!!

[sumidha]

I would suggest you experiment with coconut oil right before you wash, the first few times, until you're sure about the amount your hair likes. Just take a little bit, like maybe pea sized amount? Rub it between your palms until it's liquid, them run your palms over your hair from the ears down until it's distributed over your hair. You might need to use a brush to distribute it evenly, if you find that just your hands isn't spreading it enough. It should give you an effect similar to a silicone serum when used in moderation. If you use too much and it looks stringy and oily, don't worry, just wash it out. Tons of people use coconut oil as a pre-washing treatment and putting coconut oil in your hair before you wash can actually help prevent damage to already damaged hair that occurs when i's washed.

Because you're trying to change up your routine so much I'd suggest you use the blog feature of the website to keep a record of what your hair likes. With the combination of multiple products it can sometimes get confusing, and it will help you keep track. Good luck!

[Ophidian]

While you are experimenting with products (slowly, as others have wisely recommended), it might be very helpful to learn to do some protective styles so that if something doesn't give the results that you'd hoped or your just having a blah hair day (which we all have), then you can put it up safely and forget about it for a while. This is what I do when my hair and I need a break from each other. It really helped me when I was getting through my own personal rocky spot with growing out a pixie and had moments where I wanted to cut it all off.

Also, sometimes you might try a product and your hair feels terrible and you just have to wash it again, I get that. But my thought is that getting the styling down may have to take a back seat for a while if your priority is rehabilitating your hair. You may find that you are happier with your hair texture as it is once it starts to get healthier overall. My main point here is just that it is easy to get stuck in a cycle of overwashing if if you don't have a contingency plan for less-than-ideal-hair days :).

Finally (promise), biggest game-changer for me: using my blog here as a tool to keep track of washes. I list products used, method, and results. If I am feeling fancy I add a picture of what my hair looked like the next day. i have learned so much about my hair by doing this. Highly recommend it.

[lapushka]

I did get itchy but I am not sure if that is because I left it too long and it was itchy before I washed it. I wanted to at least try a sulphate free and if it doesn't work then I know.

I am good with no heat if I can just get these flatter top pieces to curl! It is crazy how much curl I have underneath that I never really knew existed.

So if I am ONLY changing shampoo to start does that mean I shouldn't being using the leave-in at all? What about the curl stuff - I do need to style it or its just a frizzy mess.
Or just the shampoo change on scalp? the rest are more for my ends so would that be ok?
I really do want to thank you lapushka you have given me such great advice on all my posts <3
A lot of you have helped me so much -- thanks!!

You're welcome! Absolutely!

I do think that scalp health is the most important thing in hair care. I have seborrheic dermatitis (itchy, flakes, redness) and I need to keep my scalp happy. This means I can keep it at bay by using a strong sulfate shampoo, and when and if I do have a flare-up, I need to use the medicated shampoo, which is Nizoral 2%. And I don't mess with that, when I need it, I need it. I tried to go sulfate-free as well, a long time ago. I also tried CO-washing and even WO, but my scalp flared so bad every time that I just had to stop! If my scalp is not happy, in my case, I shed more, and trust me... it's not worth it.

But it's your time to experiment. You'll have to figure it out for yourself! Good luck. :flower:

[kickrz22]

I would suggest you experiment with coconut oil right before you wash, the first few times, until you're sure about the amount your hair likes. Just take a little bit, like maybe pea sized amount? Rub it between your palms until it's liquid, them run your palms over your hair from the ears down until it's distributed over your hair. You might need to use a brush to distribute it evenly, if you find that just your hands isn't spreading it enough. It should give you an effect similar to a silicone serum when used in moderation. If you use too much and it looks stringy and oily, don't worry, just wash it out. Tons of people use coconut oil as a pre-washing treatment and putting coconut oil in your hair before you wash can actually help prevent damage to already damaged hair that occurs when i's washed.

Because you're trying to change up your routine so much I'd suggest you use the blog feature of the website to keep a record of what your hair likes. With the combination of multiple products it can sometimes get confusing, and it will help you keep track. Good luck!

So I don't want the oil on my scalp at all? or sometimes just not often?

Just wondering - if I am suppose to put it on before I wash my hair if it wouldn't be better to do it the night before I know I am heading out.
That way I can leave it on and wash it in the morning.

[Reyesuela]

Don't oil your scalp with coconut oil. :). It's purpose is to prevent protein loss with washing and combing.

[lapushka]

So I don't want the oil on my scalp at all? or sometimes just not often?

Just wondering - if I am suppose to put it on before I wash my hair if it wouldn't be better to do it the night before I know I am heading out.
That way I can leave it on and wash it in the morning.

If your scalp is already itchy as it is, and H&S helps it, chances are you DO NOT want to put oil on your scalp. I can't tolerate an oil or conditioner on my scalp either. But that's just me. If you should have SD, you do not want to put an oil or conditioner on your scalp.

[sumidha]

Just wondering - if I am suppose to put it on before I wash my hair if it wouldn't be better to do it the night before I know I am heading out.
That way I can leave it on and wash it in the morning.

Absolutely! Lots of people leave it in overnight and wash it out in the morning. :)

As others have already covered, if you're having scalp issues it's better not to put oil on your scalp.

[Deborah]

Also, finger combing is not for everyone. Most of us use and love our brushes and combs. I think our scalps need the stimulation and cleaning provided by careful but thorough brushing.

[lapushka]

Also, finger combing is not for everyone. Most of us use and love our brushes and combs. I think our scalps need the stimulation and cleaning provided by careful but thorough brushing.

I finger detangle throughout the week, so not to disturb my wave pattern too much. But once a week, right before a wash, out comes my WT (wide tooth) comb and my Tangle Teezer (TT). I carefully detangle, then hair gets washed, and after it comes out of the towel, right before styling, I go through it with a WT comb once more, for the last time for the week to come.

[kickrz22]

Also, finger combing is not for everyone. Most of us use and love our brushes and combs. I think our scalps need the stimulation and cleaning provided by careful but thorough brushing.

Honestly so far I don't miss my comb or brush! I have super thin hair that's only shoulder length so it doesn't get many tangles. Also because I am trying to embrace the waves using my fingers helps to not pull the waves down. The top of my hair is straighter and the underneath curlier!

I am learning so much about techniques and my own hair it's kinda cool :)

[kickrz22]

Tomorrow I am heading in to have my hair coloured all over for the last time and possibly cut some off. I have been blonde for so long it will be a change for sure. Is there anything I should do to prepare my hair? Deep condition or something?

My roots are pretty dark, I was due for a touch up last month but had to cancel. Last time they were done was Nov/Dec. Since I am trying to go healthier and my dermatologist said I can colour but only 1 shade lighter I might has well just have my stylist dye the ends to match the roots and let it be for a awhile. I should be ok with just root touch ups if I am taking care of it in every other aspect. Who knows maybe I will even like my natural colour ;)

I think I read that your hair grows 1/2 inch per month so if I trim every 3 months I can cut away the damage. Would like to keep some length!

Thanks for reading - I think I am just nervous!

[Reyesuela]

Is there any way your stylist will at least do a semi permanent dye?

[kickrz22]

Is there any way your stylist will at least do a semi permanent dye?

I don't see why not. The goal is just to get the colour even.

[Rowdy]

I also started with very damaged hair and for the first year I used Aussie 3MM (very similar to the Aussie moist) as my regular conditioner with every wash. It worked great with my poor heat/dye trashed hair :) Now that most of my damage is cut out I don't see too much of a difference between conditioners anymore but it was the difference between straw and curls for my old hair. Good luck with your hair journey!

[kickrz22]

Almost a month in!

Things I have been doing
*no heat
* when I wash I condition first and leave it on while only washing my scalp, rinse both and follow up with the Aussie 3mm. If I am pressed for time I do 3 minutes but most times I leave it at longer (hours)
*no brushing - wide tooth comb if needed which isn't often
*said goodbye to being a blonde and now back to my roots ;)

I use a gel to bring out some curl and try to go 2-3 days between washes.

I am not really noticing much of a difference - my main concern is still that the shaft is still so damaged that no matter what I do the breakage will "run up" on the newer healthier stuff and the only way is to chop it ALL off but I guess time will tell.

[kickrz22]

Just got some Peppermint Oil for around the house and someone mentioned it may help with hair growth. I haven't changed anything in the last month and a bit and haven't really noticed any difference in my hair.

Wondering if I should add some peppermint oil to my conditioner? I condition the ends first so i could add it to that bottle or I do the aussie 3 mm at the end and leave it on lots longer - I could add to that as well.
It is suggested to leave it on/in longer?

[Prism]

Hi, kikrz22,

I'm returning after a long time away. I don't have any wisdom to offer, but I wanted to say I'm right there with you, discontinuing use of heat. I'm sure with the helpful people here your hair will be thriving and looking healthy very soon! Welcome!

[kickrz22]

10 months without ANY heat or colour and I am not seeing any difference in my hair :(

Heading to get a trim and maybe some highlights next week so maybe she will see some miraculous change that I don't.

[*Wednesday*]

10 months without ANY heat or colour and I am not seeing any difference in my hair :(

Heading to get a trim and maybe some highlights next week so maybe she will see some miraculous change that I don't.


Don’t forget that hair which is damaged, unless they are immediately removed (i.e. cut off), that damaged hair continues to grow out. The only thing you can do is use product to treat the damaged areas and be gentle. Not using heat or color is great and you get an A+, this prevents further damage but does not “undo” damage it will be around until like I said grows out. You may need to micro-trim until that damage is grown out.

It takes time, sometimes years. Many of us faced the repercussions hair abuse. What takes years to do cannot be fixed in 10 months.

[Harini]

10 months without ANY heat or colour and I am not seeing any difference in my hair :(

Heading to get a trim and maybe some highlights next week so maybe she will see some miraculous change that I don't.

I don't know your hair history but I sounds like you were bleaching it? (You said you were blonde and now back to your natural, darker color)
Bleaching and heat both destroy hair and split the ends, which can continue to split your hair upwards until/unless they are cut off. I agree with Wednesday, get regular trims to remove the damage.

You mentioned quite a few new products in your first post and may or may not still be experimenting. After my friend bleached my hair and it was falling out (he didn't get to touch it again after that) I re-began my restoration routine. This had happened to me once before many years ago.
Once a week, put coconut oil in damp hair (away from the roots as others have said), and leave it in either all day or overnight. Then when you shower, shampoo once and follow with a rinse out protein treatment (since you've bleached and used heat your hair will need it BUT when you notice your hair has adequate protein, discontinue this step). I got great results with Joico K Pak Reconstructor.
This combo restored protein and moisture for me very well, but I still had to cut off the dead ends of course. They just became less fragile and didn't split the rest of my hair as bad.
In the past I've had very positive results with a Shea Butter leave in but the manufacturer changed the recipe so I'm trying raw Shea butter as a leave in. Can't speak to how well it works yet at restoring but my ends are much softer.

Good luck on your hair journey!! Try not to get discouraged :flower:

[lapushka]

10 months without ANY heat or colour and I am not seeing any difference in my hair :(

Heading to get a trim and maybe some highlights next week so maybe she will see some miraculous change that I don't.

10 months is like 5 inches of growth. That barely comes to the ears, of course the rest of your hair still needs TLC.

I wouldn't get it highlighted if I were you, but that's what I would do. If you are dead set on it, you go for it!

To tell you the truth it is going to take a lot longer than "just" 10 months if you want to see change in the hair. That is why patience is key. This is a process of at least 2/3 years. No joke! :flower:

[kickrz22]

Thanks! I just thought I would see SOME progress, something that would make me feel like it's working. I mean if this is a genetic thing nothing I do will help anyway.
I have spots above both temples that is so short! If it's been growing back healthy then it shouldn't be broken - right? If I pull my hair back the hair on either side is like maybe an inch or 2 long so it must have broken off.

I am really just trying to understand my hair is all.
It looks awful and it's really making me sad. The top is so dark and the ends are blonder now only from the sun as I haven't put any colour in since my hairstylist went darker 10 months ago. Add the grey into it all and I just need some kind of change to make me feel better.

Don't mind the awful state of my hair -- just want to show this area because it's been babied and it so short! Shouldn't new stuff be better?http://i1190.photobucket.com/albums/z457/trimad22/IMG_0151.jpg

[kickrz22]

OMG sorry it's huge!! If anyone knows how to make the pic smaller let me know ..lol

[Nightshade]

No worries, huge is better in this case :)

The hairs around the edges tend to be shorter like that, I know mine are. Same with the ones at my temples and at the nape of my neck. They just never grow past a few inches, and that's totally normal. You can see my halo of short bits here:

https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/4XnuvoCDvsnQV5h8OWN66ZmRUswGJRqp-Lbs3W6bEcIh-vLjEwWd6MWZtn9H1oDiGYWi6LBJHpkeT2yBH4Qo-HnhdBoCHALm9aHnp7MOPoofxw-1-l5nE9v4JFGvlKJTHdrI7aky5lP6kPq6y6XQzQOaLDSOOPFx205 Le00EtWxeQdCbmexR3u7TLwHx4l6nQnPXwtgDe1ZsTCtUw14sj txb6QEYqFbCS30BAzmnALQbskkYM3q9XlHvABuoRK74Fj9AlDH ae3TCQjcHAKVdQGL4wlGEED1FWgEvnKp0GpmXnv7xVpyeC8ma3 atA-2xnfk2hhHsioduab3rHTcAIHTllpnuC1I6gsoYNTsjpD1aY0Gc EN6umjuDd1tPwi5iQ22evClxaczq8Tz2teJ9OR7S4A2SUkuvYM w93m6YS3H-Fm5hHkd9b7ho5NE5Bw1mBSlTp2kJvta78yQa6AOSjlkrhZbuIt TJOmJsxb4QWBVpGIHGMGXUhCnGJieH-m4BzlgyNbcZawW5YL_Nk8WFp_xHbXIBdUxY7YPuDfPG-rj6NvTE-_HkPtoQP-baTfEYS1l4CDFC7r_ikKi7SZfmSU5YOs_wxzqcRwUyH3QY05tg n78iERIEdUguRAVKQSEaYIAmEkkpZEvpKSuIYEXGqn9EkPKvk1 sj8Ew=w705-h778-no

Neck halo:

https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/R6CmMcfmnP-N6JujIs-GmF7fJmnACg1xEpwXnXswEYUDR6C_8zkMn1g2f2h6u_rnjjtJA-vcnf6Aq1PvsszRkNKBcVc08_Ndpqe2DYeRe_IhFqDAskRaSiPa cpVsiOu86rT2bNHxX2w-dcUuTNDPcJZQLsM36oOQyZaEWUgVxrv0RMNGLNVX8yrOWQk0Wu 8EcuWJqSb2uQp1Smu1jckDZwoywiZiIUZDeh5OzzVfFRJcwGj8 n7wAkrCNAfyA2QSp7ynp7593VX0rY7oLD6uW68WKBSreOduXvk J6TBv70I2u5SeL-y5DF1Vj8ADfikP4Invjg9zVp0kvzKZXejJdUttBs0OUoAme0sg eRWopLK3geooSnkTvwO6-gLl2jX5JTl3TL5o2YKamYbYNhhRpMQJj6_mvj-IfRc7jj9veL-1_wrdgOY9zA0POBG2oNh90_IQUJt_YYqUUydvfDNTh3SshRgyt qn1Xnj8Gy8tDpiTy9SXtTBkAf0YvH_qsSLVJvic73xoCC9Cv4U OPONR4ZaMX6rMZJN0NOjtGKe_3CvYaB__-qUT0Gjs1kI4GABt0UUB1NXzOil9Qjl5ggCYRoCl9_8-l5v7Z0U7djDXImHeEBlQiX0EnnEFlDMO9ieBWUWDy6mWqR0d6W hyTW6Zy3-J4H-zz-smKeA=w542-h778-no

I think the overall health of your new growth (of which it looks you have several inches) is a much better gauge than your baby hairs :)

[lapushka]

I can't see the picture. :( Photobucket has new rules, you can't post on other sites/forums anymore without paying a hefty fee. Might be time to go to another host. I myself have imgur, and so far am pleased with it, just make sure if you make an account there, to set your album to private (otherwise imgur locals will rip you to shreds). You can still post pictures here with the album made private!

[divinedobbie]

I think most everyone has short hair on their temples and nape like nightshade said. And yours are short like normal but they look thick and healthy so that is a good sign. Unfortunately it is a very long process to grow out damage. Honestly I don't think I saw any difference until my new growth was at least to my shoulders so we're talking a year and half for me.

[Nightshade]

It is a very long process. When I came to LHC I was two years into growing out my damage, and it took me a full 5 more years to grow and trim it out all the way.

There's an article I wrote (linked in my siggy) that I literally then expanded into a book, but the main thing is to be patient. The stuff you damaged is damaged. It will stay damaged until it's gone. It's a long, hard process, but over time, does slowly get better and easier :)

[Lisa-K]

Also, finger combing is not for everyone. Most of us use and love our brushes and combs. I think our scalps need the stimulation and cleaning provided by careful but thorough brushing.

I'm one of those people who can't deal with finger combing. :D My hair looks and feels so much better with a solid wooden brush. It's gentle enough so it doesn't pull out hair, yet works beautifully at detangling and smoothing out my hair. I guess it really depends on the texture of your hair. If I finger combed alone, I would always have tangles here and there.

[kickrz22]

Don’t forget that hair which is damaged, unless they are immediately removed (i.e. cut off), that damaged hair continues to grow out. The only thing you can do is use product to treat the damaged areas and be gentle. Not using heat or color is great and you get an A+, this prevents further damage but does not “undo” damage it will be around until like I said grows out. You may need to micro-trim until that damage is grown out.

It takes time, sometimes years. Many of us faced the repercussions hair abuse. What takes years to do cannot be fixed in 10 months.

Thank you. I wasn't expecting it to be all fixed I guess I just assumed I would notice something! Less hair loss, less breakage -- something!!


I don't know your hair history but I sounds like you were bleaching it? (You said you were blonde and now back to your natural, darker color)
Bleaching and heat both destroy hair and split the ends, which can continue to split your hair upwards until/unless they are cut off. I agree with Wednesday, get regular trims to remove the damage.

You mentioned quite a few new products in your first post and may or may not still be experimenting. After my friend bleached my hair and it was falling out (he didn't get to touch it again after that) I re-began my restoration routine. This had happened to me once before many years ago.
Once a week, put coconut oil in damp hair (away from the roots as others have said), and leave it in either all day or overnight. Then when you shower, shampoo once and follow with a rinse out protein treatment (since you've bleached and used heat your hair will need it BUT when you notice your hair has adequate protein, discontinue this step). I got great results with Joico K Pak Reconstructor.
This combo restored protein and moisture for me very well, but I still had to cut off the dead ends of course. They just became less fragile and didn't split the rest of my hair as bad.
In the past I've had very positive results with a Shea Butter leave in but the manufacturer changed the recipe so I'm trying raw Shea butter as a leave in. Can't speak to how well it works yet at restoring but my ends are much softer.

Good luck on your hair journey!! Try not to get discouraged :flower:

I was blonde when I was younger and once the golden highlights came through I started dying it blonder and blonder.
My hair doesn't really have issues growing it's just when it gets to be about 2 inches long it breaks off :(


10 months is like 5 inches of growth. That barely comes to the ears, of course the rest of your hair still needs TLC.

I wouldn't get it highlighted if I were you, but that's what I would do. If you are dead set on it, you go for it!

To tell you the truth it is going to take a lot longer than "just" 10 months if you want to see change in the hair. That is why patience is key. This is a process of at least 2/3 years. No joke! :flower:

Well I can be patient I guess, not like I have much of a choice anyway...lol.
She kept it all dark, no highlights just got rid of my really light ends (from the summer)



I can't see the picture. :( Photobucket has new rules, you can't post on other sites/forums anymore without paying a hefty fee. Might be time to go to another host. I myself have imgur, and so far am pleased with it, just make sure if you make an account there, to set your album to private (otherwise imgur locals will rip you to shreds). You can still post pictures here with the album made private!

Put the pic in the albums here - I think! http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=30261&d=1518663516


It is a very long process. When I came to LHC I was two years into growing out my damage, and it took me a full 5 more years to grow and trim it out all the way.

There's an article I wrote (linked in my siggy) that I literally then expanded into a book, but the main thing is to be patient. The stuff you damaged is damaged. It will stay damaged until it's gone. It's a long, hard process, but over time, does slowly get better and easier :)

Thank you all for your feedback!! I just wanted to see SOMETHING, something that showed it was going to be ok. I wasn't expecting miracles just a sign I was on the right path I guess.
I will keep research, trying things and remain patient :)

[Ophidian]

I have a “halo” too, I think that’s normal for many people. I also noticed when I stopped bleaching/dying/heat straightening my hair years ago that I got a lot of regrowth which stuck up every which way for a while until it grew out a bit. So maybe there’s a silver lining here :)