Lightening hair without damage?

[- Lizzy -]

I have a really ugly dark shade of dirty blonde hair that has gradually gotten darker as I got older. When I was younger it was platinum blonde, then progressed to light, then dark blonde, then dirty blonde. It has always been something that bothered me (The darkening of my hair) and thats one of the only reasons I like summer is because it lightens my hair again. So to the point of this, is there any recommended lightening techniques that wont damage hair or dye it? I lightly use lemon juice but that is useless without sun in these winter months. I have also tried using chamomile tea on my hair which I have found worked a tiny bit but I need to buy some more.

[Alex Lou]

Besides the sun, honey lightening is the only way I know of without damage:
http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=148&page=110

I personally didn't find honey lightening to be effective, but you can read about the success of others in the linked thread.

I think it's worth saying that dark to medium blonde hair is not ugly. Although it's out of fashion, tricking us into disliking it.

[- Lizzy -]

Yeah, I actually like it on other people but im critical of myself. I used to look one way and now I look another. My goal is just to lighten it back to a lighter dirty blonde so it doesn't appear almost light brown (Not that i dont like that color). Missing that sunshine though :sun:

[meteor]

^ I also think darker dirty blonde is beautiful! :D

If you really want to lighten, I think very few strategically placed highlights/balayage with really low vol. peroxide might be the best bet. But that's damaging, even if you do it over coconut oil with Olaplex and multiple protein treatments for damage control...

Honey lightening (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=148&page=110) is supposed to work because of extremely low content of hydrogen peroxide in honey, but many of us didn't really see any difference at all and there were even a case of two of reported damage on the LHC.
Lemon juice is highly acidic and pretty damaging and very drying, if you leave it on for long. I wouldn't consider it to be a damage-free lightening option. Unlike hydrogen peroxide, which is an oxidizing agent, lemon juice lightening is a reduction–oxidation reaction ("redox" reaction, for short - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Redox).

Honestly, if chamomile tea worked well enough for you, I'd stick with that. :) Chamomile doesn't exactly lighten, but it can brighten by staining, imparting more orangey/warm yellow tones temporarily, and if you like the effect, that's a great non-damaging option.

[lapushka]

I have a really ugly dark shade of dirty blonde hair that has gradually gotten darker as I got older. When I was younger it was platinum blonde, then progressed to light, then dark blonde, then dirty blonde. It has always been something that bothered me (The darkening of my hair) and thats one of the only reasons I like summer is because it lightens my hair again. So to the point of this, is there any recommended lightening techniques that wont damage hair or dye it? I lightly use lemon juice but that is useless without sun in these winter months. I have also tried using chamomile tea on my hair which I have found worked a tiny bit but I need to buy some more.

It's very normal for lighter blondes to get darker - very normal. Is there a chance of you getting used to the color you have. There's an entire thread devoted to this (blonettes thread).

Maybe honey might work, as it contains a tiny bit of peroxide, but Pha had some damage from that "treatment", as I recall.

[Rebel Rebel]

Hi Lizzy,
My boyfriend might have the same color as you. At his roots it's a very very dark ashy blonde and as it's grown out, it's one of the most beautiful blonette shades I've seen. When it was shorter you'd have never known how gorgeous it could become. It has incredible natural bright highlights at shoulder length. He's a hairdresser and his clients always want that color. It's like a color that can't be made except by nature. I totally understand wanting the color of your youth though.

[lapushka]

Hi Lizzy,
My boyfriend might have the same color as you. At his roots it's a very very dark ashy blonde and as it's grown out, it's one of the most beautiful blonette shades I've seen. When it was shorter you'd have never known how gorgeous it could become. It has incredible natural bright highlights at shoulder length. He's a hairdresser and his clients always want that color. It's like a color that can't be made except by nature. I totally understand wanting the color of your youth though.

Back when I colored my hair and wanted to go back to my natural color - it could *never* be done. That's why I think this color is so precious and it's hard to see people go at it with lighteners and darkeners - but it's up to them. I for years didn't accept my natural ash color either. I went all colors, blonde, brown, red, black, ... never being satisfied with the outcome, so coloring again and again. Not a pretty picture, and my hair was in such a state!

I one time did come near my natural color when I was growing it out for the last time, and that was an Indola semi color in dark ash blonde (very dark colors).

[meteor]

^ Oh yes! :agree:
I think one of the tools that helped me appreciate my hair color (which darkened a lot with age, typical for blonettes...) and helped me stop highlighting was just seeing it on others, in magazines and online, in great light. These darker shades of blonde / light-ish shades of brown can be really gorgeous, especially in good light, surrounded by flattering colors, on shiny hair, and they can look both really natural and classy... It's really a question of perspective and getting to appreciate what we've got. :D

[Rebel Rebel]

Back when I colored my hair and wanted to go back to my natural color - it could *never* be done. That's why I think this color is so precious and it's hard to see people go at it with lighteners and darkeners - but it's up to them. I for years didn't accept my natural ash color either. I went all colors, blonde, brown, red, black, ... never being satisfied with the outcome, so coloring again and again. Not a pretty picture, and my hair was in such a state!

I one time did come near my natural color when I was growing it out for the last time, and that was an Indola semi color in dark ash blonde (very dark colors).

In my teens and early 20's the last thing I wanted was my natural medium brown color. I played around with all the colors too ( so much damage ) and really the only one that looked good and healthy was jet black. A part of me will always want to be raven haired and IRL that's how a lot of people remember me. Ahh I loved it!

As it is now in my 40's, I've learned to love the cool dark ashy aspect of my brown hair and appreciate the golden tone I see in certain lights. I know I mentioned elsewhere that I cover some greys on top that I color. Even using an ash brown meticulous mix of high quality color, it can never be as pretty as my own natural shade.

I really have such an appreciation for all natural hair colors now knowing how beautiful they look on an individual and how they compliment your skin tone, whatever you're born with. Blonette is some seriously gorgeous color though!

[Rebel Rebel]

Forgot to say that I've only let me natural color come through/grow in the last 4 years. I've colored and some bleached well into my late 30's and why I'm still growing out damage. This is the most I've had of my natural color and I'm going to love it as long as I can.

[marvel-lover]

I totally understand! My family loved my platinum blonde hair, but as I got older, now they just look at it and sigh. Personally, sunlight works the best. I lifeguard outdoors during the summer, so my hair lightens many shades. But, I live in a very cloudy area during the winter, so I find that honey with a bit of lemon can do just fine

[OhSuzi]

If you can learn to love the naturel colour you have, and grow out virgin hair, it may be darker, but the condition will be amazing. I chopped all the bad bleachy stuff off into a pixie which grew a bit and then got chopped again before I am now growing it long.
I have grown out my virgin hair for 7 months so far, it was a much darker colour than I expected compared to the golden colour of my youth. But individual hair strands are so much thicker than My dyed hair was, they don't tangle or break as much, it's been 7 months with no hair cut/ no trims/ not even s & d at all and I've seen very few split ends. I've got a lot of fluffy new growth so I think my hair thickness over all is going to be better, my hair is shinier. As its gotten longer i can see how it reflects in the light, still not as golden as my youth, but lighter than the very dark brown of 2 inch hair.
Over time the sun will lighten your hair a bit, and that is permanent, it shouldn't magically go brown again in the winter.
The new hair you grow in the winter at the roots would be darker, but it'll be lightened by the next lot of summer sunshine.

Even the gentle lightening from the sun will damage your hair mildly.
Anything with ammonia/ peroxide could lighten your hair, so proper bleachy highlights would work but will cause damage.
Watered down bleach, Lemons, camomile tea, raw honey apple cider vinegar, cinnamon wee wee ( yep urine as it has ammonia) or a combination of them could all potentially lighten your hair, but that's usually because of the ammonia in it. Some of those ingredients produce more reddy tones. There's less ammonia, so it'd be more gentle than bleach but still mildly drying and damaging

I have tried some of the natural methods although I did not commit to them for long enough I managed maybe 1-2 months tops. They had 0 effect other than making my hair sticky and smell nice, or vinegary.

Pigeon poop was used by romans to lighten hair, and lead powder was used on faces and wigs later on in history for lightening, but I wouldn't recommend either method.

Sea salty water is is supposed to help? I think salt can make your hair very dry, which is not great, but I remember reading that dry hair looks lighter??? Also when it's sunny if your in the sea the water reflects the sunlight more so more on your hair, but also more risk of sunburn.

[KittyBird]

Back when I colored my hair and wanted to go back to my natural color - it could *never* be done. That's why I think this color is so precious and it's hard to see people go at it with lighteners and darkeners - but it's up to them. I for years didn't accept my natural ash color either. I went all colors, blonde, brown, red, black, ... never being satisfied with the outcome, so coloring again and again. Not a pretty picture, and my hair was in such a state!

I one time did come near my natural color when I was growing it out for the last time, and that was an Indola semi color in dark ash blonde (very dark colors).

Oh yes, I can relate to that! I had pin straight, silky, golden blonde hair as a child, which turned wavy, frizzy and dark ashy blonde when I hit puberty. I hated everything about my hair! I went the same route, started dyeing my hair at 13, and had red, black, blue, purple and brown. Being on this forum made me appreciate my natural hair colour, and I've been growing it out for around 1,5 years now.

Lizzy, maybe you could take some pictures of your hair in different lights? Dark blonde hair can look very different depending on the light, and it might not be as dark as you think it is. Also, check out the blonette pride thread (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=80416), it has really helped me a lot. :)

[lapushka]

Maybe you could take some pictures of your hair in different lights? Dark blonde hair can look very different depending on the light, and it might not be as dark as you think it is. Also, check out the blonette pride thread (http://forums.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=80416), it has really helped me a lot. :)

Oh I've long since learned to accept my hair color. Unless you meant the OP. :o ;)

[LadyCelestina]

Or you could just bleach it and deal with the damage. You can do coconut oil soak before. It's better to have a little damage than hate your hair, right?

[KittyBird]

Oh I've long since learned to accept my hair color. Unless you meant the OP. :o ;)

Ah, yes of course, it was intended for the OP! :o I didn't realize that it might be confusing since I quoted you :lol: