Worrying about household chemicals touching hair

[diamond_storm]

Hey everyone! Not sure why I'm posting this..... I guess I'm probably just looking for some reassurance/to vent:confused:

I'm so frustrated with myself. I hate to always come back to this... But as I've mentioned in other posts, I have OCD and I often have obsessions that revolve around my hair. I obsess about things (typically soaps and cleaners--I especially worry about laundry detergent, for some reason) touching my hair that could "contaminate" it. It has gotten so bad that I don't even keep any household cleaners at home. I don't use laundry detergent (I have a laundry ball instead) and for household cleaning I use vinegar and water. Obviously it's impossible to avoid all of the "contaminants" completely (toothpaste is another big one of mine, which obviously I can't just get rid of), and if I even suspect for a split second that my hair might have come into contact with a "contaminated" object, I rinse my entire head with water. In my mind, getting something harsh like a laundry detergent or soap on my hair and not washing it off immediately could somehow cause damage to my hair. It might not seem like a big deal, but as I'm sure many of you will understand, washing or rinsing long hair, sometimes multiple times a day, is a huge hassle and waste of time (and is probably causing more mechanical damage than it is helping anything).

Today, for example, I was doing laundry and reached into the dryer. I live in an apartment, and the washer and dryer had been used before I moved in. When I was cleaning it I noticed some spilled laundry detergent on the side of the washer. Even after cleaning it off, ever since then I've obsessed about it and I avoid touching the outside of the washer and dryer. So when I leaned in to the dryer, my head came close to the "contaminated" outside part. Even though I'm pretty sure my hair didn't even touch the dryer (and even if it did, the surface it touched probably didn't have anything on it since I already cleaned it off), I obsessed about it and went to rinse my hair off in the shower. Things like this are an almost daily occurrence.

I'm just at my wits end with myself. OCD is not a logical disorder. Obviously I'm able to discern when there is a legitimate cause for concern or not. But that doesn't stop the illogical response I have to situations.

I think maybe it would help me to know how other long-hairs (or people who highly value their hair) deal with situations like using daily household chemicals and the like. Clearly not everyone obsessively washes their hands/clothing/hair/anything that might have come into contact with soap during the day. Do you guys even consider it at all? What would you consider overkill or not in regards to chemicals touching your hair?

I'm really sorry if this is inappropriate to post here:-( I just kind of have no one else to turn to since obviously this is all ridiculous and crazy.

NOTE: Pretty much most of the time my hair is in a bun, so it's not hanging down into stuff. I do have bangs which hang down, but even if I didn't I'm sure my brain would find a way to twist it into making me think I contaminated my hair somehow.

[rhaena]

Maybe you could get one of those silk sleep caps and wear that when you clean? Thats the only thing I can think of ;P

[diamond_storm]

Sometimes I do wear a shower cap when I clean or do laundry, haha!! That is a good suggestion and I appreciate it:flower: I'm more trying to avoid obsessing about illogical things though, rather than to keep being unreasonable. Sometimes I think it helps just to hear people tell me I'm overreacting about nothing, as silly as that sounds:p

[Nini]

Have you thought about seeking help? It sounds like a good idea to get a handle on this before it bleeds into other parts of your life as well.

[rhaena]

Well then I'm sure it wont hurt your hair!! good luck with everything :)

[diamond_storm]

Have you thought about seeking help? It sounds like a good idea to get a handle on this before it bleeds into other parts of your life as well.

Oh definitely!! I have been in therapy for my OCD for a long time. It definitely affects many other aspects of my life. This part is just particularly annoying and time consuming. Thanks for asking though :)

[diamond_storm]

Well then I'm sure it wont hurt your hair!! good luck with everything :)

Thank you :) I hope I didn't come across as unappreciative!! It was really kind of you to make that suggestion.

[Chromis]

I think maybe it would help me to know how other long-hairs (or people who highly value their hair) deal with situations like using daily household chemicals and the like. Clearly not everyone obsessively washes their hands/clothing/hair/anything that might have come into contact with soap during the day. Do you guys even consider it at all? What would you consider overkill or not in regards to chemicals touching your hair?


I often wear a bandana or a head tubie while doing messy tasks myself, like summer gardening or spraying the shower door down to try yet again to get all the hard water deposits (vinegar is not enough, and even if it was, my spray bottle makes a mist that goes *everywhere* anyhow). I am happy to stretch washes, so it is not so much a cleanliness thing per se, just something that makes sense and keeps any wispies out of my way when I can't be touching my hair a bunch to shove them back under my ears. Also it keeps sweat out of my eyes in the summer!

Wearing a kerchief tied over your hair used to be a very common thing to do while cleaning only a few decades ago it is and pretty practical really. (And before that, think of the ruffled mobcaps and aprons that used to be worn back when cleaning was even messier!) I do also don the apron sometimes and probably should do that more often really. It is so handy when I do!

[mizukitty]

Totally get where you're coming from. I have GAD, but experience "Pure O" thoughts when it comes to specific, really terrifying phobias for me (dentistry.) For example, when I last needed a root canal, like last year, I think I spent 10 hours straight every single day until the procedure googling root canals. From the procedure, to what tools they use specifically, to what the most common tooth infection is, (it's a granuloma, btw *cries*). Just everything. I couldn't stop. So I TOTALLY know how it feels to ruminate constantly and how crappy it feels.

Even if you slathered toothpaste or laundry detergent all over your hair, what is the worst that could happen? Toothpaste goes into your mouth, which is sensitive, and laundry detergent consists of pretty much the same surfactants (albeit in higher concentrations) as your shampoo! They aren't legally obligated to list ingredients, however it's really mostly sulfates. The thing is, they both rinse out in plain water easily. And remember, people bleach their hair!

So, next time you're doing laundry, ask yourself if the thoughts are reasonable. You will be able to confirm they're not. Think about a logical answer to "what will happen if I get laundry detergent/toothpaste in my hair?" Then try to respond with a reasonable action. Don't wear a shower cap, it will continue to make you think something terrible will happen *if* on the off chance, some ends up in your hair.

Perhaps grab a shed hair, and purposely put toothpaste on it. Leave it on for a minute, and rinse it off. Examine the hair, did it fall apart? Did it even get damaged? The ingredients are not powerful enough to damage your hair, they'll just leave it extra squeaky clean if anything. :)

I hope this was in anyway helpful. I tried to use the same thinking my therapist uses for my intrusive thoughts which is 1. is it logical? 2. is it USEFUL? If you can't answer those two, your worry starts to fall apart. And when it does, you kill it with facts. The fact is, your hair will be completely fine! :flower:

Hugs to you!

[cailinbee]

Before I begin, I'm going to request that a mod a) maybe move this to a mental health support board? and b) If I'm overstepping rules by relating my advice and experiences with OCD therapy, please alert me; I'm trying to put the appropriate disclaimers on this.

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Hey, I have OCD and am very familiar with the household contaminants anxiety! It's very common; I have met lots of people in my life who have experienced it to some degree. I think it's not helped by the cultural reinforcement that anything that is "organic!" or "natural!" is automatically better and less "toxic". My own contaminant anxiety has come and gone throughout my life.

First of all, I recommend seeking a therapist familiar with OCD specifically. If you're interested in learning to lessen the anxiety that household chemicals cause you, a therapist would likely want to talk and walk you through cognitive behavioral therapy and/or mindfulness exercises. Can't stress that enough -- find expert help as a first priority! I sought help at my university when my OCD got so bad that it was turning into agoraphobia and I was skipping classes -- I found a campus therapist who both did CBT with me as well as an OCD support group. Both were incredibly helpful.

However, I realize that depending on what situation or country you're in, it might be hard or too expensive to go for professional help -- in that case, look for reading material by similar experts on thought exercises to help with OCD. I don't want to dish out any further words without being super serious that professional help and advice trumps ANYTHING I say!!

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Okay, with that said -- again, I'm not a medical professional or a therapist -- exposure is actually good for this kind of anxiety. And I don't mean literal dangerous exposure, or actually doing anything that literally would harm your skin or hurt your body with chemicals. Absolutely not. But what broke my own chemical/contaminate anxiety was the fact that I majored in fine arts, and was exposed to chemicals far more dangerous than any soap, etc. on a daily basis to even be qualified to be graded. I had to work with carcinogenic paints and dyes, paint thinners, toxic medium, inks, solvents, even acids to make printing plates. For five years straight! I learned the rules and the OSHA practices for each and every chemical I worked with, and believe me, I freaked out about a lot of it. But after a while I found myself getting to the point where I would get a bit of, say, paint thinner on my hands, or something -- once I even splashed a bit of (diluted) plate-making acid on my bare skin by accident -- and I didn't freak out! Once I think I even got paint thinner on my lip (sometimes things splash in directions you just don't intend!) I would just go about the recommended procedure for cleaning it off of my skin, and move on. The anxiety was just no longer present because I had to be exposed to that stuff every single day, and I was able to handle dangerous chemicals in a rational way. That's what exposure therapy can do.

So, for household chemicals, secondary to seeking professional help, practicing safe exposure paired with mindfulness might help. Maybe take something that you know rationally is safe for skin (or hair), like a drop of common dish soap, and hold it in the palm of your hand. I would never suggest such an exercise with something that is actually unsafe to hold on your skin, but sometimes OCD "safe" and real-world "safe" don't look the same -- pick real-world "safe," something you rationally know can be touched and held. Look at it, observe it, talk about it out loud to yourself, even articulate exactly why you're afraid of it. (These are all taken from things my therapist taught me about my various anxieties -- and talking out loud helps!) See if you can hold in in your palm for ten, twenty, thirty, sixty seconds. See if you can do it in front of a supportive friend or family member, and have a dialogue about it, however silly it seems. My best friend has been amazing with helping me with therapy exercises* -- talking about how silly OCD can be to someone else can really bring it out into the light and help cope. Then let yourself feel free and safe to wash your hands however you need to to be able to go about your day.

*My own biggest fear is flying -- so my best friend booked a private flight in a tiny plane and held my hand for an hour long flight. That was an extreme form of exposure therapy, but I was awfully proud to take that experience back to my support group, LOL!

Edit: Also, I know washing / hand washing due to OCD can get extreme and in itself hurt -- cracked/dry skin being a common result -- so please take care of yourself even when you're not to the point yet where you can resist washing to feel better. Keep your hair and hands moisturized! <3 Many internet hugs, I've been there and understand the OCD experience!

Edit 2: I also know you're specifically asking for help with contaminant anxiety pertaining to your hair; I read into your message and it sounds like you're anxious about contact in general so I just talked about an exercise for skin contact. I think the principle is the same -- find something you are afraid of but is rationally safe for hair, put it on a strand of hair, look at it, talk about it, describe it, etc.

[lapushka]

Before I begin, I'm going to request that a mod a) maybe move this to a mental health support board? and b) If I'm overstepping rules by relating my advice and experiences with OCD therapy, please alert me; I'm trying to put the appropriate disclaimers on this.

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Yes I agree and I am all for the move. This really is about OCD not hair per sé and some people might not want to answer because this is public.