Soft water + daughter's hair = no bueno HELP!

[pili]

Ok, so we moved a bit less than a year ago to the country and we now have very soft water. My hair LOVES IT! Seriously? Some of the best hair of my life. Unfortunately, my daughter's hair is suffering. We can't seem to figure out how to fix it either. Her hair is very different than mine. She has 1c/2a/F/ii-iii blond hair. Normally it is so fine and soft that it can't stay in ponytails or braids very well. Normally.

Now it has lost it's shine, has a heavy build-up/waxy texture, especially near the roots, and her scalp is beginning to suffer. I've had her stop using conditioner. She has tried different shampoos, even a hard water one I had from when we lived in a hard water area, and Dr. Bronner's Peppermint liquid Castille soap. Nothing is working. I just bought a shampoo bar from Whole Foods (forget the brand) today to see if that will help. The attendant said I could bring it back if it doesn't work.

The water is from a spring/well and is not due to a water softener, so there is no adjusting it. Also, the rest of up are loving this water. My son (also a mini-long-hair) and I have shiny soft hair now instead of a dried out mess. All I can find on line is what it does, but not how to deal with it. And even that is very little as most water articles are about hard water.

So, please, any help is appreciated. Please note she is 11yo so is not going to want to get very complicated about her routine. We just need something that will make it feel clean and return the shine and softness. She does not wash it every day, maybe once a week.

Again, thanks in advance.
Pili

[lapushka]

Stop trying everything at once.

Keep clarifying with the regular shampoo until it all regulates again, because I'm sure it will.

[spidermom]

Ack; Dr. Bronner's on hair is terrible stuff except for a very few. I second lapushka - use a clarifying shampoo and, if that doesn't seem to be doing the trick, follow with a white vinegar rinse.

[pili]

We've been using it (clarifying) for weeks and it is not working. The Dr. B we only used once. We've been living up here almost a year and this became an evident problem in September, so that's how long I've been trying things.

I was doing some research on the forums and read that some people had a lot of luck clarifying with an egg wash (1 yolk, 1 tsp honey, 1 tsp acid). We have chickens so I can get VERY fresh eggs. Would that be a clarifying option? We need something that will actually strip the hair of all the wax/oil build-up.

[lapushka]

She might be getting "hormonal" at age 11, if not already, and might need a good clarifying wash every day. I'd get the Suave daily clarifying, if I were you, a nice cheap shampoo and stick with that. No, I would *not* try the eggs. Eggs are "nourishing", and sounds to me like she needs something to cut through oil.

[pili]

She might be getting "hormonal" at age 11, if not already, and might need a good clarifying wash every day. I'd get the Suave daily clarifying, if I were you, a nice cheap shampoo and stick with that. No, I would *not* try the eggs. Eggs are "nourishing", and sounds to me like she needs something to cut through oil.
Maybe you're right. It's just hard to tell with water that is so opposite of the hard water we had when her hair was behaving. Hubby even noticed it and he's usually not the kind to notice that. I was hoping the egg wash would be a good natural was to clarify, but maybe not. :/

[lapushka]

I remember when my hormones hit, I had a number of months too where my hair was beyond oily, once my menstruation came through, it settled a bit and then... yeah, lots of washing with a good harsh sulfate.

[Anje]

Built-up waxy texture at the roots and her scalp is suffering?

Honestly, it might be something like seborrheic dermatitis and not related to the soft water at all. You might want to try a medicated dandruff shampoo, ketaconazole if you can find it.

[turtlelover]

Ok, so we moved a bit less than a year ago to the country and we now have very soft water. My hair LOVES IT! Seriously? Some of the best hair of my life. Unfortunately, my daughter's hair is suffering. We can't seem to figure out how to fix it either. Her hair is very different than mine. She has 1c/2a/F/ii-iii blond hair. Normally it is so fine and soft that it can't stay in ponytails or braids very well. Normally.

Now it has lost it's shine, has a heavy build-up/waxy texture, especially near the roots, and her scalp is beginning to suffer. I've had her stop using conditioner. She has tried different shampoos, even a hard water one I had from when we lived in a hard water area, and Dr. Bronner's Peppermint liquid Castille soap. Nothing is working. I just bought a shampoo bar from Whole Foods (forget the brand) today to see if that will help. The attendant said I could bring it back if it doesn't work.

The water is from a spring/well and is not due to a water softener, so there is no adjusting it. Also, the rest of up are loving this water. My son (also a mini-long-hair) and I have shiny soft hair now instead of a dried out mess. All I can find on line is what it does, but not how to deal with it. And even that is very little as most water articles are about hard water.

So, please, any help is appreciated. Please note she is 11yo so is not going to want to get very complicated about her routine. We just need something that will make it feel clean and return the shine and softness. She does not wash it every day, maybe once a week.

Again, thanks in advance.
Pili

I'd actually probably try some good old fashioned Head & Shoulders and just use conditioner on the ends. If she is having scalp issues, she probably has at least a mild case of SD going on.

[pili]

My son get SD. This is not the same.

[turtlelover]

My son get SD. This is not the same.

With any kind of "gunky" scalp, in my mind, that would lead me to either suspect needing to wash more often, needing a harsher shampoo, or needing some type of medicated shampoo. I don't know of too many pre-adolescents that can wash their hair once a week and not get a pretty greasy, gunky scalp, by the way.

[pili]

With any kind of "gunky" scalp, in my mind, that would lead me to either suspect needing to wash more often, needing a harsher shampoo, or needing some type of medicated shampoo. I don't know of too many pre-adolescents that can wash their hair once a week and not get a pretty greasy, gunky scalp, by the way.

My son, only a year younger has had softer hair and clearer scalp and skin since moving here, his sister went the opposite way, which is what made me think it might be the water. Our landlord also warned us that our hair and skin would be affected. She is actually surprized that my hair loves the soft water.

I'm kinda hoping it's the water and not hormones. I don't think I'm ready to deal with puberty yet.

[pili]

So we got home and we used the shampoo bar from Whole Foods. OMG! It worked beautifully. Her hair is still a little damp now but is is soft and shiny and the wax is gone from her roots. A wooden comb glides through the damp strands with ease.

I HIGHLY recommend this bar if you live with soft water. I'm linking it below. I'd be curious if any of the more chem-savvy members could tell me why it worked.

https://jrliggett.com/tea-tree-hemp-oil-shampoo-bar.html#product_tabs_review_tabbed

[lapushka]

Well, I'm glad you found something that works. I think you really didn't need the advice. :)

[pili]

Well, I'm glad you found something that works. I think you really didn't need the advice. :)

Maybe, but I appreciate it anyway. Now I get to sit here worrying about how her hair will freak out during puberty. :lala:

[mizukitty]

Great news that you got it out! Was going to suggest Lush's shampoo bar made specifically for soft water. Soft water makes it more difficult to completely rinse out the product, so in the future I could only really think to rinse EXTRA long, even parting the hair sections to really ensure product is gone.

[mizukitty]

Also, that 'poo bar you used is a normal bar of real soap. Not detergent like with sulfates, but just saponified vegetables fats. Lye soap. It's quite alkaline, though, which can be harsh on the scalp if used consistently, so definitely follow with a weakened ACV rinse if you can, to restore the pH of the scalp (mildly acidic)

[spidermom]

Also, that 'poo bar you used is a normal bar of real soap. Not detergent like with sulfates, but just saponified vegetables fats. Lye soap. It's quite alkaline, though, which can be harsh on the scalp if used consistently, so definitely follow with a weakened ACV rinse if you can, to restore the pH of the scalp (mildly acidic)

Seconded. Alkaline products can leave the scalp vulnerable to fungal infections. Most shampoos are pH balanced for optimum health of the scalp.

I'm really puzzled as to why people think that soft water makes it harder to rinse. All soft means is that there is very little calcium, iron, etc, which can push the pH toward the alkaline side. I could tell at my father's house (where the water is hard) that my hair had stuff in it after washing and rinsing, although a vinegar rinse did help it feel more normal. With soft water at a neutral pH, I can tell that it rinses clean.

[Anje]

In soft water, the chemistry of the water's interaction with soap is a little different. Additionally, you need less soap or detergent, which can take some adjustment.
http://chemistry.about.com/od/howthingsworkfaqs/a/softwaterrinse.htm (Warning: Dumb video with audio that autoplays. Kill it with fire!)

[pili]

Great news that you got it out! Was going to suggest Lush's shampoo bar made specifically for soft water. Soft water makes it more difficult to completely rinse out the product, so in the future I could only really think to rinse EXTRA long, even parting the hair sections to really ensure product is gone.
I saw something about a Lush soft water bar, but I had trouble finding it on the website. The is a Lush store near me, so if the bar from Whole Foods hadn't worked, that was my next stop.


Also, that 'poo bar you used is a normal bar of real soap. Not detergent like with sulfates, but just saponified vegetables fats. Lye soap. It's quite alkaline, though, which can be harsh on the scalp if used consistently, so definitely follow with a weakened ACV rinse if you can, to restore the pH of the scalp (mildly acidic)
Yeah, I'm going to do that next time. Her hair is a bit poofier this morning, but not greasy or waxy at all. I found the Bar Shampo thread and I'm reading up on a good routin for her.


Seconded. Alkaline products can leave the scalp vulnerable to fungal infections. Most shampoos are pH balanced for optimum health of the scalp.

I'm really puzzled as to why people think that soft water makes it harder to rinse. All soft means is that there is very little calcium, iron, etc, which can push the pH toward the alkaline side. I could tell at my father's house (where the water is hard) that my hair had stuff in it after washing and rinsing, although a vinegar rinse did help it feel more normal. With soft water at a neutral pH, I can tell that it rinses clean.

For us it was the opposite. I would constantly ask her if she had rinsed out everything, but there was still a film on her hair. The bar was the only thing to not leave a film. I will use ACV next time.


In soft water, the chemistry of the water's interaction with soap is a little different. Additionally, you need less soap or detergent, which can take some adjustment.
http://chemistry.about.com/od/howthingsworkfaqs/a/softwaterrinse.htm (Warning: Dumb video with audio that autoplays. Kill it with fire!)
Very cool! Thank you. I always like knowing the why behind things.