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CreatureBailey
October 11th, 2016, 12:09 AM
Hewwo. So. A few nights ago my aunt told me I had no hair. No hair. She meant it as in ''thin''. But still...the choice of words was very insulting. If I didn't have hair I wouldn't be putting oils in it, I wouldn't S&D, or put 32$ mask in it, I wouldn't be part of this freaking community now wouldn't I? Plus my pony circ is 2.5''. I explained to her the science of the pony circ and how that made me into the ''medium'' category rather than in thin. But she kept saying ''don't argue with me, you have no hair''. Excuse me? SCIENCE says I have medium thickness. You can't argue with science. Ugh. She compares me to my cousin. Just cause my cousin has more thickness than me, then automatically I ''have no hair''. Like...I gave a name to my hair, I think, I THINK if I had NONE I couldn't name it now wouldn't I? And I KNOW my hair is NOT thin. It's more than 2'' circ. I know it's freaking medium man but it just hurts to be told something like that when I take care of it and maintain it and such. Like a lot of things I do are specifically my hair. Like the cereals I eat in the morning have a lot of protein and vitamin B. I could eat fruit loops or Reese puffs cereals but I decide to eat what's best for Bailey. I sometimes sleep in a shower cap because of the hair masks. Yet even if I have this hobby, I'm being told something rude like that. It's like some people don't even do nothing for their hair and they just get praised and like you just stand right there remembering the vitamin B complex spoonfuls you took last night and the scalp massage you did and you witness this person not caring about their hair more than that being looked at with a peaceful, angelic smile of someone asking ''Are you gonna let it grow?'' or ''Oh wow your hair is long!'' and you're just standing there like ''hh ghtiv djbk--nribn WHA? My hair is LONGER than hers!!'' and like you're the one who has LHC and such as a lifestyle but you're treated like a joke. Grrrrr. Hmmpphhh. Yeah, maybe she's right. Maybe I have no hair. HEY. Bailey doesn't exist, they're in my head. I'm just hallucinating my tailbone long hair. i'm hallucinating that I'm having this journey for 5 years. No but like seriously, my hair is NOT in the thin category. Just because someone else has it thicker doesn't mean mine is thin. it's medium. And even people with thicker hair have their hair thinner than others too. Doesn't mean THEY have no hair???

It insulted me so much and pissed me off. I want to tell that to my aunt but I don't want her to randomly recieve a long paragraph about my hair? I dunno

Hrrmmpphh :angry:

Rant done

Goodnight

Me and my VERY EXISTING Bailey are gonna water rinse

Shiranshoku
October 11th, 2016, 12:52 AM
Next time, just pet your hair, and say: I might have no hair according to you, but I'm pretty sure you have no manners according to everybody.

Especially the 'don't argue with me' comment is ridiculous, imho. Don't let it get to you! I'm sure your hair is lovely. It cracks me up that you've named it. :-)

Also, try to care for/like your hair for you, don't compare yourself to others. Maybe they have great genetics and can wreck their hair and still look good, or maybe they douse it in serums and work with it for hours in the morning to make it look good. The only hair you know everything about is your own. :-)

Seratopia
October 11th, 2016, 12:56 AM
I'm sorry. I relate so much to you. I've been told I had no hair, (sister had beautiful thick hair but I got the thinner gene of course) and when I pull it up say, in a bun or even a side braid I get these odd bald spots on the side of my head that I have to comb over (my boyfriend and I jokingly refer this as "grandpa hair."

My sister never does oiling, or rinses or anything the LHC suggests. She is blessed with gorgeous hair. Just take whatever people say with a grain of salt and know your hair, Bailey :) is just as beautiful as any other hairtype. Sure the media might advertise that thicker hair is beautiful but so is ours! I had my indian step mom who has really beautiful thick hair tell me she wanted my hair because it's like silk. There are the good and bad of all hair types and all are beautiful. Your aunt is just ignorant of that.

I hope you feel better after your rinse, doing my hair routine always improves my mood. :)

restless
October 11th, 2016, 03:23 AM
Breathe. Let it go. You have hair and you know it. Your aunts silly comment changes nothing.

Ps. theres nothing wrong with having thin hair. Ds.

Mimha
October 11th, 2016, 04:31 AM
Some peopl always find a way to be hurtful, and I found out that the best way to react is either to behave like you don't care (you pet Bailey with a self-satisfied smile and say that for you it is a beautiful treasure and you're gonna grow it to floor length), or you reply using the same harshness than your interlocutor, saying something like "better to have no hair than no head" (or too much a**, or whatever will shut them up once for all).

Banzaï ! :draw:

Kake
October 11th, 2016, 04:41 AM
Your aunt sounds like a very negative person. I hope you can feel better, it's a problem with her, not with your hair.

When I'm in a situation like that I say "I'm happy with it". End of conversation.

lapushka
October 11th, 2016, 05:20 AM
There's no arguing with people that are that determined. Next time, don't try and defend yourself so profusely, it's in one ear and out the other with her, and she'll stick to her guns. So just shrug it off, best you can do.

Not that it doesn't hit you where it hurts. I know. :flower:

lithostoic
October 11th, 2016, 06:10 AM
That's when I hit people with the "You are being so incredibly stupid and ignorant that I don't even know what to say to you."

Flipgirl24
October 11th, 2016, 06:34 AM
Hewwo. So. A few nights ago my aunt told me I had no hair. No hair. She meant it as in ''thin''. But still...the choice of words was very insulting. If I didn't have hair I wouldn't be putting oils in it, I wouldn't S&D, or put 32$ mask in it, I wouldn't be part of this freaking community now wouldn't I? Plus my pony circ is 2.5''. I explained to her the science of the pony circ and how that made me into the ''medium'' category rather than in thin. But she kept saying ''don't argue with me, you have no hair''. Excuse me? SCIENCE says I have medium thickness. You can't argue with science. Ugh. She compares me to my cousin. Just cause my cousin has more thickness than me, then automatically I ''have no hair''. Like...I gave a name to my hair, I think, I THINK if I had NONE I couldn't name it now wouldn't I? And I KNOW my hair is NOT thin. It's more than 2'' circ. I know it's freaking medium man but it just hurts to be told something like that when I take care of it and maintain it and such. Like a lot of things I do are specifically my hair. Like the cereals I eat in the morning have a lot of protein and vitamin B. I could eat fruit loops or Reese puffs cereals but I decide to eat what's best for Bailey. I sometimes sleep in a shower cap because of the hair masks. Yet even if I have this hobby, I'm being told something rude like that. It's like some people don't even do nothing for their hair and they just get praised and like you just stand right there remembering the vitamin B complex spoonfuls you took last night and the scalp massage you did and you witness this person not caring about their hair more than that being looked at with a peaceful, angelic smile of someone asking ''Are you gonna let it grow?'' or ''Oh wow your hair is long!'' and you're just standing there like ''hh ghtiv djbk--nribn WHA? My hair is LONGER than hers!!'' and like you're the one who has LHC and such as a lifestyle but you're treated like a joke. Grrrrr. Hmmpphhh. Yeah, maybe she's right. Maybe I have no hair. HEY. Bailey doesn't exist, they're in my head. I'm just hallucinating my tailbone long hair. i'm hallucinating that I'm having this journey for 5 years. No but like seriously, my hair is NOT in the thin category. Just because someone else has it thicker doesn't mean mine is thin. it's medium. And even people with thicker hair have their hair thinner than others too. Doesn't mean THEY have no hair???

It insulted me so much and pissed me off. I want to tell that to my aunt but I don't want her to randomly recieve a long paragraph about my hair? I dunno

Hrrmmpphh :angry:

Rant done

Goodnight

Me and my VERY EXISTING Bailey are gonna water rinse

When people insult others, it is about them not you. They are usually projecting some hatred of themselves onto you. Consider the source. Just walk away. Don't give in to arguing because the more you do, the more they think they are winning. Say thanks for your comment and walk away. I know it's hard when you're hurt and you want to say something back but if you thank her and pretend it doesn't bother you, it will throw her off. I used to do this to a superior at work. She would tell me all the things I was doing wrong and I would smile and say thank you for the advice. She liked when people shivered in their boots so she was taken aback. But remember, her comments were not about you in truth.

vpatt
October 11th, 2016, 07:07 AM
Sounds like she has some issues. Is the cousin you refer to her daughter? She may resent your success in life or maybe she just likes to put others down to make herself feel better. I know someone like that.....and also besides trying to uplift herself she just can never admit to being wrong. I would shrug it off...most especially around her, never let them know you are hurt! At least that is my philosophy. And the older I get the more thick skinned I am and I can wonder why they are so negative and pray for them to be a happier person. Stay away from her more if you are able to....I don't know your family situation.

triumphator!
October 11th, 2016, 07:50 AM
Your aunt is comparing you to your cousin because she's competitive on behalf of her own children. Just laugh and do a hairflip and go on being glorious!

spidermom
October 11th, 2016, 07:53 AM
Well that's crap! I'm sorry your aunt insulted your precious.

And I agree with restless: there is NOTHING wrong with thin hair. She was being rude in more ways than one.

AZDesertRose
October 11th, 2016, 08:23 AM
Yeah, that was colossally rude of your aunt. I'd have gone with a response along the lines of "I might have thin hair but you have neither tact nor manners." Yeah, it's rude, but she was rude first, and I feel no obligation to be polite to people who are rude to me.

Enjoy your hair for you and the heck with rude people, even if they are nominally family. From someone with thick hair, sometimes I wish mine were thinner because mine is so unruly, at least in part due to volume. Also, you'll likely be able to do various up-dos at shorter lengths than I can.

calmyogi
October 11th, 2016, 09:47 AM
Your aunt sounds like a very negative person. I hope you can feel better, it's a problem with her, not with your hair.

When I'm in a situation like that I say "I'm happy with it". End of conversation.
I really like this response. It's not rude and it doesn't give them anything to eat into. Nothing in this comment can be argued unless someone was to blatantly say "well it's ugly and you shouldn't like it". In that case be rude back because that's just mean.

People always tell me my hair is thick but I'm really in he medium category as well. It's just poofy. So I guess my point is is no one really knows you more than you.

My first thought about your aunt was that maybe she's envious of how good your hair must look from all the effort and care you put into it so she had to find some way to pick it apart. I'm sure it is really beautiful :)

Stepo_NiNha
October 11th, 2016, 10:15 AM
When those people start arguing about my hair I just say: Yeah, okay, yeah, right, okay, maybe.

I know it's not easy because you may get too emotional and can't contain words but there's no need to argue with these negative people. Comparisons ain't good so you should completely forget it!

I know it's hurtful because it already happened to me and I don't have thin hair either. F/ii (fine or baby fine hair with medium thickness) may confuse people and opinions can get quite ambiguous. Some non-LHC'ers may say you have thin hair. I'm F/ii with 3.3' (8 cm) circ. and I'm yet to find someone that would say my hair is "thickish". But I really don't care anymore because I learned in LHC how thin hair can be awesome and now I wish my hair (from pixie to shoulder) could be a little thinner!

Kajzh
October 11th, 2016, 10:16 AM
Wow, that's terrible! I'm sorry! I hope your aunt learns to respect your bodily choices eventually. A lot of people hate my hair or think it's disgusting. But I know the truth about the effort and care I put into it. So I try my best to ignore it, but sometimes it is hard!

Mirabele
October 11th, 2016, 01:48 PM
So sorry to hear about that negativity. Try to stay strong and believe in yourself and never stop believing you know best for your hair (or your body or your skin or anything else in your body).
My mother is like that. She says that i would look better if i would cut my hair. This time was hard because i am proud of having my hair as long as bsl. But my hair is very long, i say. So what, she says, but it is very thin. Like there is no point in longer hair if it is thin. Aw. Moments like that i feel like i am 14 again not 40 :(

x3leesa
October 11th, 2016, 02:04 PM
I agree with what a PP said, sounds like she's trying to compare you to her own child/children /: LOL and agree, do that long hair flip girl, pfft!!! My mother just told me last night when I was showing her how proud I was that I'd gotten past waist length she said "yeah but the ends aren't all even, so it won't look good unless they are." I was like THEY'RE CALLED FAIRY TALE ENDS MOTHER IT LOOKS FINE ;__; lol!!! Rock on girl!

Pinni
October 11th, 2016, 02:28 PM
I'm sure your hair is beautiful! I thought she is jealous to you when I read your story. She should be the older and wiser but it unfortunately is not always so. Enjoy your beautiful hair and day.:)

HairPlease
October 11th, 2016, 02:28 PM
I have trouble understanding how people can be so rude, so casually, unprovoked. Sorry you had this experience. It's not that you have no hair, it's that she has no idea what hair is. :lol: On a serious note, thin/medium hair is just as pretty as thick hair in more ways than one. Be proud of it no matter what your crotchety aunt says about it. I also wonder if it was subconscious comparison to her own kid/kid's hair. Women can be very competitive beings (actually, human beings in general can be).

sarahthegemini
October 11th, 2016, 02:30 PM
Yet another thread where somebody is disgusted at the thought of being told they have thin hair :rolleyes:

Sarahlabyrinth
October 11th, 2016, 02:34 PM
Yet another thread where somebody is disgusted at the thought of being told they have thin hair :rolleyes:

She was told she had NO hair....

vega
October 11th, 2016, 02:36 PM
What this supposed to mean, one of our community has been insulted any empathy at all...I'm sorry to hear about your Aunts comments my Aunt is always got something to say and mostly I zone out

sarahthegemini
October 11th, 2016, 02:36 PM
She was told she had NO hair....

Which quite clearly isn't the case, and op was constantly reiterating that SHE DOES NOT HAVE THIN HAIR!!! Like, seriously that isn't the worse thing in the world :rolleyes:

sarahthegemini
October 11th, 2016, 02:38 PM
What this supposed to mean, one of our community has been insulted any empathy at all...

Having empathy is one thing but it's pretty irritating the way people act as though thin hair is just an awful trait. We should appreciate all hair types. Especially on a hair forum. ..

Sarahlabyrinth
October 11th, 2016, 02:38 PM
She wasn't complaining about thin hair, she was complaining about being insulted.

sarahthegemini
October 11th, 2016, 02:41 PM
She wasn't complaining about thin hair, she was complaining about being insulted.

The insult being...thin hair :rolleyes:

vampyyri
October 11th, 2016, 02:41 PM
Here we go again with the "stop insulting thin hair" comments... :rolleyes: That's reading too far into it—the girl was insulted, and she's getting slapped on the wrist for feeling offended and venting...? :confused:

Sarahlabyrinth
October 11th, 2016, 02:44 PM
The insult was NO hair. Obviously the aunt was being mean and obnoxious. The OP was not saying that she had thin hair. Because she doesn't. Even if the aunt meant to say thin hair, why would anyone take what she said seriously? Of course there's nothing wrong with thin hair.

sarahthegemini
October 11th, 2016, 02:44 PM
Here we go again with the "stop insulting thin hair" comments... :rolleyes: That's reading too far into it—the girl was insulted, and she's getting slapped on the wrist for feeling offended and venting...? :confused:

Perhaps as you're a thick haired lady it doesn't effect you but being on a forum where your hair is constantly insulted isn't nice. I'm not gunna argue, I'm just saying that LHC sucks sometimes (this isn't the first time) because of the attitude towards those that don't have thick glorious manes.

sarahthegemini
October 11th, 2016, 02:46 PM
The insult was NO hair. Obviously the aunt was being mean and obnoxious. The OP was not saying that she had thin hair. Because she doesn't. Even if the aunt meant to say thin hair, why would anyone take what she said seriously? Of course there's nothing wrong with thin hair.

You've missed my point entirely so I'm just going to leave it here.

Sarahlabyrinth
October 11th, 2016, 02:48 PM
Perhaps as you're a thick haired lady it doesn't effect you but being on a forum where your hair is constantly insulted isn't nice. I'm not gunna argue, I'm just saying that LHC sucks sometimes (this isn't the first time) because of the attitude towards those that don't have thick glorious manes.

Do you get constantly insulted on this forum?

sarahthegemini
October 11th, 2016, 02:51 PM
Do you get constantly insulted on this forum?

There are comments that upset me, yes.

Quixii
October 11th, 2016, 02:56 PM
Honestly, I understand the issue, and did find it a little off-putting.
The implication is that the insult would be valid if she did have thin hair, ergo, having thin hair deserves an insult. Which is not true, and harmful to the tons of people who do have thin hair. There's nothing wrong or less than about thin hair. It's wrong for people to insult hair of any thickness by calling it thin or non-existent, and it's wrong for the implication that someone does have thin hair to be insulting. It's hair, and it comes in many thicknesses and thinnesses. There's nothing wrong or bad or insult-worthy with any of them.

vampyyri
October 11th, 2016, 02:58 PM
Perhaps as you're a thick haired lady it doesn't effect you but being on a forum where your hair is constantly insulted isn't nice. I'm not gunna argue, I'm just saying that LHC sucks sometimes (this isn't the first time) because of the attitude towards those that don't have thick glorious manes.

I do have empathy, so I can understand the frustration... but she was not actively shaming anyone, she was simply stating how something happened and how it made her feel.

I would feel much the same if someone looked at my hair and said "you have no wave" or something along those lines, when I clearly do. I wouldn't be shaming people with straight hair for having straight hair, but I would proclaim that is wasn't straight.

Hopefully that makes sense, I have a head cold and my brain is pretty much cooking right now.

Sarahlabyrinth
October 11th, 2016, 02:58 PM
There are comments on this forum that upset me also. I choose to remain here because the great majority of members are wonderful people. As for the upsetting comments, I usually leave those threads alone. There may be people who think thin hair is bad, but you can choose not to take those comments seriously. They are merely opinions, and that's all. I'm sure most folks here are supportive of all hair types, because they are all beautiful.

KittyBird
October 11th, 2016, 02:59 PM
Perhaps as you're a thick haired lady it doesn't effect you but being on a forum where your hair is constantly insulted isn't nice. I'm not gunna argue, I'm just saying that LHC sucks sometimes (this isn't the first time) because of the attitude towards those that don't have thick glorious manes.
I agree with you. Yes, OP did get insulted and it was not nice, but she then proceeded to repeatedly state that she definitely does not have thin hair, as if having thin hair is the worst thing in the world. It's not the first time this has happened here on this forum.

Cg
October 11th, 2016, 03:12 PM
I may have the thinnest hair of anyone here and I have never felt the least bit insulted by anyone's reference to thin hair.

x3leesa
October 11th, 2016, 03:34 PM
I do have empathy, so I can understand the frustration... but she was not actively shaming anyone, she was simply stating how something happened and how it made her feel.

I would feel much the same if someone looked at my hair and said "you have no wave" or something along those lines, when I clearly do. I wouldn't be shaming people with straight hair for having straight hair, but I would proclaim that is wasn't straight.

Hopefully that makes sense, I have a head cold and my brain is pretty much cooking right now.

I think you explained that well!

Alissalocks
October 11th, 2016, 04:43 PM
Your aunt would call me bald. :p Barely over i into i/ii land on this head.

I still love my hair. You love Bailey too. Screw the world if they don't understand your love. :cheer:

CreatureBailey
October 11th, 2016, 05:18 PM
Hello guys! :) Let me clarify some things

I never meant to seem like I was insulting thin hair.. the thing is my aunt kept repeating my hair was in a certain category when even science proves it's not, and even if I kept trying to explain that to her she kept saying that... I just hate that because my cousins have thick hair, besides them I automatically look like my hair is thin to my family. I don't mean to insult people with thin hair, it's just that I prefer Bailey to be considered medium... there's just something with people calling my hair thin that insults me. But I don't mean to bring down other people with this hair type. I wouldn't mock other people. It's kinda like people that prefer being identified as female, doesn't mean they actually mean to bring down people who are male.

sommer
October 11th, 2016, 05:37 PM
Don't be too frustrated about this :eek: I understand how it's unpleasant in fact because I rather often had conflicts with different people about my dyings obsession, especially in the crazy colours like here here (http://stylemann.com/best-hair-color-ideas/) :( I remember a very similiar conflict when my mother saw me at the first time with this bright green, she was very rude with her comments too...:(

image (hotlinking not permitted) (http://stylemann.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/17-Neon-Greens-650x650.jpg)

Just try not to pay attention on such things, it's simple, what you like is not always liked by others... The most important thing is your love and proudness for your hair :)

Entangled
October 11th, 2016, 05:44 PM
I'm sorry your aunt was unapologetically rude to your face...the nerve of some people.... As someone who generally eschews direct conflict, this boggles me.
I will point out, however, that there's really nothing particularly scientific about the hair typing system. I don't think science has studied the average hair thickness too much.

Kat-Rinnè Naido
October 12th, 2016, 12:02 AM
We all get sensitive relative to something. Me for example if I'm told my hair looks like a bush or that I have such big hair. Because my hair just has a lot of volume.

So working to achieve greatness in ourselves and not to get noticed for the time and effort we put into it hurts. That is human nature. We just have to rise above everything even over our own emotions which we may feel justified about. It's hard we all make mistakes.

I hope the OP is feeling much better.

Coral Grimes
October 12th, 2016, 03:43 AM
That green though! :heartbeat

I have probably by far the thinnest hair on here, but I just think so what? No one would ever want my hair but it's mine and I like it. I get comments all the time about my hair colour, my clothes, my perfume (BPAL addicts for the win) but if I love something I'm going to wear it, I don't give a flying feck what anyone else thinks.

Also, I love that you named your hair! My ex used to call me Willow (as in Willow the Wisp) because of my frizz. :o

Next time she says you have no hair just smile and say, "Cool. You have no brain."

Hairkay
October 12th, 2016, 04:51 AM
I'd say it's best not to spend time around that rude aunt.

Shiranshoku
October 12th, 2016, 05:04 AM
I think it's pretty obvious that the OP is quite sensitive about her hair. I get that :-)
It's also obvious that she doesn't like it being labelled thin, and gets quite upset when that happens.
TBH, I don't see how such a preference is automatically insulting to people who do have thin hair. She's ranting, she's hurt, she's also young, sooo.. I'd cut her some slack.

That being said, CreatureBailey, the way you word things can indeed come across as callous and inconsiderate.
To continue your comparison:


It's kinda like people that prefer being identified as female, doesn't mean they actually mean to bring down people who are male.

If people like that were to respond to being misgendered with - 'I'm no guy, and I've seen plenty of girls with gross beards and pitiful boobs that didn't get misgendered' it wouldn't really go over that well.

lapushka
October 12th, 2016, 06:09 AM
I think it might be because OP once created a thread that severely insulted the thin haired on this site? Do you all remember that thread? Might be sensitive because of that reason. I think everyone's feelings should be considered here. :flower:

sarahthegemini
October 12th, 2016, 06:09 AM
Don't be too frustrated about this :eek: I understand how it's unpleasant in fact because I rather often had conflicts with different people about my dyings obsession, especially in the crazy colours like here http://stylemann.com/best-hair-color-ideas/ :( I remember a very similiar conflict when my mother saw me at the first time with this bright green, she was very rude with her comments too...:(

http://stylemann.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/17-Neon-Greens-650x650.jpg

Just try not to pay attention on such things, it's simple, what you like is not always liked by others... The most important thing is your love and proudness for your hair :)

That looks phenomenal.

sally_neuf
October 12th, 2016, 06:40 AM
Ohhhhhh CreatureBailey !!! I SOOO get it!!!!!! I know, my rational side now it's silly to pay attention to what others say.. that it's not about me, that they're being rude, that I shouldn't listen. But my heart gets like a pressure cooker about to blow up and I feel like punching people who do this sort of comments in the stomach :slap:

In my case was my sister commenting "Oh you have so little hair!" while smiling like it was something soo weird. Well.. she had just had two pregnancies behind the other so it's quite understandable she has a pony tail comparable to a horses tail. She probably didn't even want to be rude but it was just sooo Ugh, If you have nothing good to say, just don't say it :steam

animetor7
October 12th, 2016, 08:55 AM
I think it's pretty obvious that the OP is quite sensitive about her hair. I get that :-)
It's also obvious that she doesn't like it being labelled thin, and gets quite upset when that happens.
TBH, I don't see how such a preference is automatically insulting to people who do have thin hair. She's ranting, she's hurt, she's also young, sooo.. I'd cut her some slack.

That being said, CreatureBailey, the way you word things can indeed come across as callous and inconsiderate.
To continue your comparison:



If people like that were to respond to being misgendered with - 'I'm no guy, and I've seen plenty of girls with gross beards and pitiful boobs that didn't get misgendered' it wouldn't really go over that well.

This. CreatureBailey I understand being young and insulted, and I'm sorry your aunt made you feel bad with her comments. But please realize that the way you phrase things can provoke others' insecurities and make them feel just as terrible. Maybe in the future when you're hurt like this write out the post, but then don't publish it until you've calmed down a bit and then reread it before posting to check how your phrasing sounds. This way you can still get some support if that's what you need, but run less of a risk of making others feel insulted or hurt. As you've just experienced these feelings I'm sure it was not your intention to inflict them on others, but that was the effect. And in the future you can try again and think about phrasing a bit so as not to hurt others.

Cg
October 12th, 2016, 11:17 AM
It's always good to think about how others will respond to our words. It's equally good to choose not to let others' negative or presumed-negative remarks outweigh our own positive thoughts. Everyone is entitled to his own opinion (however incorrect it may be :wink:).

Stepo_NiNha
October 12th, 2016, 12:02 PM
I already commented but now I've been reading the rest of the discussion regarding this topic...

CreatureBailey I agree that talking about thin hair again and again may hurt thin haired people, especially because there's nothing wrong with thin hair.
For all thin haired people (including you since you're one of them), there's a thread about thin hair pics and the thread is very inspiring.
Still, I understand your point. I'm also very emotional and sensitive to comments since I have a little social phobia.

Good luck though :toast:

lithostoic
October 12th, 2016, 12:35 PM
My mom keeps insisting that I have thin hair and it gets really annoying. Her own hair is much thinner and finer than mine and she always says things like "people with OUR hair type" and I'm like ... our hair is nothing alike. My hair is much more similar to my dad's (as is almost every aspect of my personality) and I think she just wants me to be more like her.

There's nothing wrong with thin hair, I think my mother's hair could be beautiful if she treated it nicely, it's just annoying being placed in a category in which you don't belong. It's like if someone was insisting that I have green eyes when they're clearly blue.

alittleprincess
October 12th, 2016, 01:02 PM
I completely understand where you are coming from. My braids and ponytails get snatched up quite frequently by people crowing "Oh you have NO hair," or, "Awww look! There's barely anything there!" etc. etc. My family members are often commenting that I should cut my hair, only because it is thin, not because of it's health! This can get to the point of pulling up old pictures of me with shorter hair just to "show me how much thicker it could look." :rolleyes: I could go on and on with the different variations I've heard over a lifetime of thin hair. I try to tune them out because taking care of my hair makes me feel pampered and happy - but comments like these can make me pretty insecure! My hair actually IS extremely fine. I can't imagine how you must feel knowing that your aunt isn't even correct in her accusation!

Your story and typing this out just makes me think - if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all! Which I need to get better at using as a response! Hope you're feeling better :)

CreatureBailey
October 12th, 2016, 03:23 PM
Thanks guys :P

And umm..yeah...when I write stuff I don't realize it could possibly offend people.? I always think it's innofensive... hmmm... but hey I guess it could have gone the other way around. Let's say I had thicker hair and my aunt would have said I had too much, I would have ranted ''I don't have thick hair!!'' and then people with thick hair would have been insulted...or if I was not a medium and she would have said I was I would have said ''i'm not a medium!!!'' at the end it goes back to being mis-categorized.. :P There's ups and downs for every type, I don't mean to bring down any of them..

AND after explaining why exactly with the proof of a mathematical measurement I'm still mis-categorized. It's like what *lithostoic* said, if someone was insisting her eye color was green when it's blue, she would be annoyed..doesn't mean she's attacking people with green eyes. :shrug::flower:

Sorry for the inconvenience guys :grouphug:

Flipgirl24
October 12th, 2016, 09:31 PM
It's all good.

Apolli
October 13th, 2016, 12:44 AM
I'm sorry you have to deal with stuff like that- it's very annoying to be miscategorized (I'm (a lebanese) arab so i get studf like that a looooot online) and it's even more annoying to be miscategorized by a family member. I'm sure that given the love, dedication and time you give Bailey that it's grown into a wonderful creature :)

CreatureBailey
October 13th, 2016, 08:02 AM
Thanks guys hehehe ^_^